Advertise on podcast: Marriage and Intimacy Tips for Christian Couples: Secrets of Happily Ever After
Rating
4.9from
This podcast has
361 episodes
Language
EnglishExplicit
No
Date created
2018/02/06
Latest episode
2026/04/21
Average duration
19 min.
Release period
7 days
Description
Have you ever wondered what makes the difference between those couples who absolutely LOVE to be together and the ones who merely tolorate each other in their old age? I always want to run up to the cute old couples who still hold hands while walking down the street and ask them all their secrets to relationship success. This podcast gives me the opportunity to do just that!I'm Monica Tanner, wife to a super hunky man, mom to 4 kids, weekly podcaster and relationship and intimacy expert/enthusiast. I help couples ditch the resentment and roommate syndrome and increase communication, connection and commitment, so they can write and live out their happily ever after love story. If that sounds like something you want, this podcast is absolutely for YOU! Each week, I'm teasing out the principles that keep couples hopelessly devoted and intoxicatingly in love with each other for a lifetime and beyond. I'm searching high and low for the secrets of happily ever after and sharing those secrets with you right here. Sound marriage advice for Christian couples who want to live happily ever after and achieve a truly intimate friendship and passionate partnership, because an awesome marriage makes life so much sweeter. Let's get to it!
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Podcast episodes
Check latest episodes from Marriage and Intimacy Tips for Christian Couples: Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast
You Can Be Right Or You Can Hold Hands
2026/04/21
In this week's episode, I name the messy middle of a relationship reset and explain why falling into an old fight can be evidence of growth instead of failure. I'm sharing a simple three-step framework to help us respond differently, protect connection, and build a stronger couple identity through repair.
• reframing “nothing’s changing” as an opportunity to do it differently
• treating the return of conflict as the work rather than a setback
• shifting from reacting to taking responsibility without shame or blame
• using the power question: how do I want to respond differently
• moving from winning the argument to protecting the connection
• using the power question: how do I protect us right now
• focusing on who we are becoming as a couple instead of “is this working”
• modelling rupture and repair so kids learn healthy relationship skills
• breaking generational dysfunction and trauma through consistent repair
Make sure you're sending these episodes to your partner and start having these conversations together. I would love to hear about your experiences with the relationship reset.
Get help by downloading my FREE Get Lucky Guide here --> https://monicatanner.com/getlucky
Send us Fan Mail
You Are Not Broken, You Are Stuck In A Pattern
2026/04/14
Today, I'm responding to a listener who’s doing the work to reconnect but still feels a lingering disconnect with his partner. I show how protective patterns keep couples stuck, then share a simple three-step way to interrupt the loop and get back to real closeness.
• why a relationship can feel off even with effort
• how protective patterns form through hurt and unmet needs
• the “adaptive child” and losing strategies like defensiveness or retaliation
• naming the pattern so we fight the loop, not each other
• slowing down in real time to interrupt tension
• translating criticism into the vulnerable need underneath
• building lasting connection through awareness and shared language
Go check out my 14-day Hotter Together challenge at: https://monicatanner.com/hotter.
If this episode resonated with you, send it to your partner or set a time to listen to it together.
I’d love to hear what you’ve decided to name your pattern, so send me an email or reach out on social.
Send us Fan Mail
How to Reset Your Relationship In Three Steps
2026/04/07
Spring invites us to clean out what’s stale in our marriage and start fresh without changing partners. I share a simple three-step relationship reset that replaces blame with honesty, turns complaints into clear requests, and builds momentum through one small win.
• spring cleaning mindset for marriage and relationships
• why most couples are stuck rather than in crisis
• step one naming disconnection honestly without blame
• how criticism creates defensiveness and shuts down repair
• finding the desire underneath a complaint
• step two making requests stupidly specific and actionable
• examples of clear asks for time, help and date nights
• step three choosing one small repeatable win
• why consistency creates momentum and rebuilds trust
• prompts to ask yourself and how to go first
If this episode resonated with you, send it to your partner. Or better yet, suggest that you listen together. And if you decide to try the reset together, I want to hear about it. Shoot me a note on social media or send me an email and let me know what is the one small thing you're gonna do this week to initiate the change.
Don't forget to download the Get Lucky Guide at https://monicatanner.com/getlucky
Send us Fan Mail
Spark The Fling In A Faithful Marriage with Katie Runyan
2026/03/31
In this interview with Katie Runyan of Faithful Fling, we explore how faithful love gets hotter when you add playful novelty. Katie shows how role play dates can break roommate syndrome, wake up the erotic mind, and turn ordinary nights into lasting memories.
• safety and novelty as twin needs for desire
• Katie’s origin story and the first costume
• awkwardness as fuel for laughter and bonding
• tapping the erotic mind with small cues
• how to invite your partner to try it
• preventing unmet expectations with separate guides
• pursuer role swaps and first‑date butterflies
• simple follow‑ups that create inside jokes
• fringe dates for couples who prefer “themselves”
• building a cadence for pattern interrupts
Visit www.faithfulfling.com and get your first role play date is FREE for 21 days. If you don’t love it, cancel before day 21 and you won’t be charged.
Send us Fan Mail
Stop Fighting About Sex And Start Enjoying It with Jessa Zimmerman
2026/03/24
In this interview with Jessa Zimmerman, we reframe desire discrepancy as normal, not a defect, and show how couples can move from pressure to play with clear tools, language, and empathy. She explains proactive vs reactive desire, why “no” should be celebrated, and how to build a buffet of intimate options.
• normalising libido differences across long-term relationships
• shifting control dynamics away from pressure and blame
• identifying health, stress, and relational obstacles to desire
• understanding proactive and reactive desire patterns
• starting with higher desire partner’s mindset and behaviours
• redefining sex as shared pleasure over goal-driven outcomes
• using the playground metaphor and “maybe” starts
• broadening options between all and nothing
• handling disappointment without punishment or withdrawal
• practicing self-validation to reduce validation seeking
• creating a safe container for exploration and communication
• restoring hope through shared responsibility and small wins
You can go to www.intimacywithease.com for free resources, guides for higher and lower desire partners, and details on courses and therapy availability
Send us Fan Mail
Create Your Own Luck By Making Intimacy Lighter
2026/03/17
In this week's episode, I'm talking about how to keep sex and connection from turning into a pressure-filled project by bringing back laughter, flirting, and lightness. I share why playfulness builds emotional safety and give three simple ways to create more “luck” in your love life.
• how seriousness turns intimacy into pressure
• why laughter signals safety and reconnects couples
• shifting from obligation to anticipation with small playful moments
• the lap dance story and why imperfection can spark desire
• three practical tools: flirt more, revive inside jokes, do something silly together
You can download the Get Lucky Guide by going to https://monicatanner.com/getlucky.
Send us Fan Mail
Desire Differences are NOT Dealbreakers
2026/03/10
This week I explore why desire differences are normal, how pressure shuts things down, and how pursuit and emotional safety rebuild connection. I share the Yes And method, practical scripts, and a simple weekly check-in to help couples design intimacy that works for both of them.
• naming the rejection–pressure cycle
• spontaneous desire vs responsive desire
• why pressure kills desire and pursuit builds it
• safety, choice, and autonomy as turn-ons
• the Yes And method for intimacy talks
• sample pursuit phrases and script swaps
• a 20-minute weekly intimacy check-in
• using green-light lists to set context
Download the Get Lucky Guide at https://monicatanner.com/getlucky
Send us Fan Mail
How to Get Lucky by Creating More Emotional Safety
2026/03/03
I'm kicking off a March series on “getting lucky” by showing why great intimacy isn’t luck at all. Real emotional safety and compassionate curiosity create the right context for desire to grow, and I'm giving you my Green Light Conversation tool to help you start.
• debunking the myth of effortless, spontaneous intimacy
• how stress, resentment, and distraction cool desire
• why desire needs safety and play to thrive
• what blocks safety: criticism, pressure, feeling unseen
• the rejection–pressure spiral between partners
• shifting from obligation to compassionate curiosity
• green light questions that build anticipation
• listening without fixing or defending
• emotional safety as real foreplay
• practical ways to reduce pressure and increase appreciation
• preview of desire discrepancy and upcoming interview
Go to https://monicatanner.com/getlucky to download the Get Lucky Guide
Send us Fan Mail
Dr. Gary Chapman On The Love Language That Matters Most
2026/02/24
Today I welcome Dr Gary Chapman to explore why love languages still matter and how dialects and personality shape whether love actually lands. We share a simple love tank ritual, a practical daily connection plan, and ways to listen without fixing so both partners feel seen.
• why dialects within the five love languages change impact
• the attitude of love versus manipulation
• the 0–10 love tank question and follow‑up
• listening as posture, not problem‑solving
• tailoring love to introvert and extrovert needs
• the 20‑minute daily check‑in, weekly dates, annual getaway
• seasons of marriage and updating dialects over time
• stories showing sincerity missing without fluency
• practicing a language you never received growing up
Go to www.5lovelanguages.com to take the free quiz or the premium assessment and to purchase Love Languages That Matter Most
Send us Fan Mail
Understanding Your Partner Doesn’t Mean Agreeing With Them
2026/02/17
This week, I'm sharing how compassionate curiosity turns conflict into connection and why understanding your partner does not require you to agree. Practical scripts, clear definitions, and real examples show how to stay on the same team while holding different views.
• use post‑Valentine’s expectations and disappointment as a chance to communicate
• compassionate curiosity as the path to intimate friendship and passionate partnership
• difference between understanding and agreement
• story of taking a friend’s side and how stance changes feedback
• faith shift case study and fear of being “tainted” by new views
• ping pong versus softball dialogue and why pacing matters
• both‑and language with sample phrases and questions
• applying the tools to money, parenting, sex, and tech boundaries
• building safety, respect and teamwork without forced consensus
Make sure that if this episode was helpful, you share it with a friend or leave a review.
Send us Fan Mail
Valentine’s Day Doesn’t Have to End in Disappointment
2026/02/10
This week, I'm talking about why February magnifies stress and how silent expectations turn Valentine’s Day into a painful guessing game. I share three steps, speak hopes out loud, name no‑gos, and define success together, plus simple date ideas and thoughtful, affordable gifts.
• February’s emotional slump and money stress
• how silent expectations create resentment
• say what you want in clear, specific words
• name what you don’t want and offer alternatives
• collaborate on a shared definition of success
• low‑cost at‑home and out‑of‑home date ideas
• practical gifts: date night journal, restocks, roleplay
• honesty and safety as the path to intimacy
Go to https://monicatanner.com/51Questions and download some questions there.
Look up the Date Night Journal on Amazon or send me an email and I will send one right to you.
Restock or try Evree Intimate Massage Cream and get 14% off by using the code: LOVE at check out. https://evreesensation.com/moni
Or try a subscription to Faithful Fling Role-Play Dates here: Faithful Fling
Make sure you comment on social media or shoot me an email and let me know how your Valentine's Day ended up.
Send us Fan Mail
You’re Both Trying… You’re Just Missing Each Other
2026/02/03
This week, I'm sharing why generous effort can still miss the mark and how a simple meaning check turns intention into real connection. Practical scripts, everyday examples, and a clear path to feel loved without guesswork.
• early chemistry fading into real differences
• clashing stories and nervous system triggers
• feeling unloved versus being unloved
• problem solving versus emotional presence
• love as subjective; unique blueprints
• five love languages as a starting point
• the meaning check skill and script
• starting small and scaling to bigger topics
• appreciation to reinforce what works
• monthly reset to review what lands
If this episode resonates, please write a review for the podcast and share it with someone you love who could use this information.
Send us Fan Mail
How Healthy Couples Use Conflict to Grow with Dana Che
2026/01/27
In this interview with Dana Che, we break the myth that happy couples don’t fight and show how conflict, handled well, can deepen intimacy. We share mindset shifts, practical language, and simple steps to move from defensiveness to understanding.
• redefining conflict as a growth path
• the costs of avoidance and silent treatment
• modern marriage and renegotiating roles
• separating facts from feelings and stories
• understanding over agreement as the goal
• curiosity and vulnerability as a creation formula
• practical I statements and safer starts
• building trust to share real fears
• how to be genuinely curious, not performative
• scripts and next steps for tough talks
Check out Dana's new book here: Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples, https://TriedAndTrueMarriageBook.com
If you enjoyed this episode, please be sure to share it with a friend and join the conversation on Instagram.
Send us Fan Mail
Boundaries Are What Make Intimacy Possible
2026/01/20
Today, I'm talking about how boundaries are a loving skill that prevents resentment and creates safety, respect, and passion. Clear, simple steps show how to set limits without threats, using everyday examples and a weekly challenge to practice.
• emotional regulation steps that precede boundary setting
• common end-of-life regrets linked to people pleasing
• redefining boundaries as self-care rather than control
• how resentment replaces intimacy without clear limits
• the mesh analogy: connected and protected
• the sock example as a practical boundary script
• structure: if or when X, I will Y
• choosing action over explanation to reduce conflict
• setting boundaries for tone, volume, and time protection
• weekly challenge to pick one recurring frustration
If this episode was helpful for you, I would love if you would share it with a friend or a coworker or a loved one, somebody that you feel like could benefit from these relational skills.
Let me know what healthy boundaries you are setting this week. If you have questions about healthy boundaries, email me at: [email protected].
Send us Fan Mail
You Can’t Control Your Partner, But You’re Not Powerless
2026/01/13
This episode speaks directly to one of the most exhausting parts of being in a relationship: realizing you can’t control your partner and wondering what that means for you.
For a lot of people, that realization feels defeating. Like your hands are tied. Like you’re stuck waiting or reacting or hoping things improve.
This week I talk about why not being able to control your partner does not mean you are powerless. In fact, your real influence in a relationship has very little to do with managing or controlling other people and how you manage yourself, which is the real flex. I also mention:
• the regret of managing others instead of living authentically
• what you can control versus what you can only influence
• common control tactics that backfire in relationships
• regulation over reactivity to build safety and trust
• the three-step power move: pause, name, choose
• my real-life gym moment from this morning
• aligning responses with values and intentions
Go to https://monicatanner.com/call and let's see if you're a good fit for one of my remaining time slots.
Send us Fan Mail
Podcast reviews
Read Marriage and Intimacy Tips for Christian Couples: Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast reviews
Sanya Bari 2025/06/14
Anyone Who Wants To Have A Good Relationship Can Benefit
There are so many short snippets of advice everywhere but it’s rare to find someone who’s doing deep and thorough work. As a relationship therapist en...
SamBGuia 2024/11/04
A Must-Listen for Couples Who Want a Happily Ever After!
Monica Tanner is not only relatable but also incredibly insightful! And her passion for helping couples reconnect, increase intimacy, and strengthen t...
HengamStanfield 2023/10/30
Happily Every After
Love this podcast and its purpose. Helping people fortify their marriages and have a love filled happily ever after. Thanks Monica
JennyJPB 2024/05/03
Sales pitch 😔
This podcast is a constant sales pitch for her company. Every interview is interrupted with “don’t forget I have this…..”. We want good content, not a...
jillfreestone 2023/09/05
Great tips easy to apply!
Your podcast is fantastic! I love your focus on helping couples create their own happily ever after, with very specific actionable tools. Your tone is...
GratefulSamsey 2023/04/21
Brilliant
Monica shines in person and on her podcast. You'll find golden nuggets in evvery episode.
E&K-Hunsak 2022/10/19
Action!
Monica is nice to listen to and I love that she is all about action. That is what is most important! Not matter where you are in your relationship, yo...
Kaylee McArthur 2022/10/17
Amazing
Monica is an amazing coach and truly cares about all those she comes in contact with. This podcast is so worth listening too and give great ideas on h...
Aliciamaedavon 2022/01/21
Super high quality and life-giving podcst!
Monica is a bright, energetic and intelligent podcast host. Her material is super encouraging, and also practical so when you listen, you can take con...
EricaBushwell 2021/06/22
Awesome podcast!
Monica, host of the On the Brighter Side podcast, highlights all aspects of self imrprovement and more in this can’t miss podcast! The host and exper...
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