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🎙 Silence ModeSeason 24: Lost & Found | Guest: Tom Sö What happens when the noise finally stops? For years, Tom Sö knew how to keep moving. Work harder. Chase success. Make more money. Push through whatever was happening internally and keep going. From the outside, that can look like ambition. From the inside, it can become exhausting. Eventually, Tom reached a point where pushing harder was no longer working. The life he had built could not quiet what was happening underneath it. And then came a sentence that changed his trajectory: “I need help.” Season 24 of Other People’s Shoes, Lost & Found, explores the things we lose that cannot be replaced by simply buying another one—identity, purpose, hope, direction, faith, or even our sense of who we are. Tom’s story brings another possibility into that conversation: What if we become so surrounded by noise that we lose the ability to hear ourselves? In “Silence Mode,” Tom and I explore the road from striving and suppression toward vulnerability, meditation, healing, stillness, and learning to relate differently to the thoughts constantly competing for our attention. Because sometimes getting found does not require another answer. Sometimes it requires enough silence to finally hear the question. 🧭 GUEST INTRODUCTIONTom Sö is the founder of MiddleWave® and the owner of Awakened Energy Healing. For more than a decade, Tom has worked in areas including trauma healing, meditation, energy work, mindfulness, and spiritual growth. His own journey through emotional struggle, meditation, and seeking help has shaped the way he now works with others. MiddleWave® was created around a challenge familiar to a lot of us: How do we quiet a mind that never seems to switch off? Tom’s work focuses less on eliminating thoughts and more on changing our relationship with them creating enough space to recognize what is happening internally and respond with greater awareness instead of simply reacting. 🧭 EPISODE DETAILSIn “Silence Mode,” Neil and Tom explore: 🔇 What happens when external success does not match what is happening internally 🏃 The danger of believing the answer to every problem is simply to work harder 💰 What chasing money and achievement can provide and what they cannot 🫀 The moment Tom finally acknowledged that he needed help 🧠 Why our thoughts do not necessarily have to control our attention or our decisions 🧘 How meditation became part of Tom’s journey toward stillness and greater self-awareness 🤝 Why asking for help can be an act of strength rather than weakness 🌊 The thinking behind Tom’s MiddleWave® approach to meditation and mind training 🔁 How patterns, conditioning, and mental noise can quietly shape the way we experience life 👟 What it means to spend less time lost inside our own heads and become more present for the life happening around us And underneath the entire conversation sits a question: When everything inside us is demanding our attention, what might we discover if we stop long enough to listen? 🧭 MEMORABLE TAKEAWAYSilence is not the absence of something. Sometimes it is where we finally notice what has been there all along. We spend a lot of life trying to turn the volume up. More achievement. More productivity. More distraction. More answers. But there are moments when finding our way forward may require the exact opposite. Quiet. Space. Honesty. And enough courage to admit that we do not have to navigate everything alone. Maybe going into Silence Mode is not about escaping life. Maybe it is about finally becoming present enough to live it. 🧭 CONNECT WITH TOM SÖ🌐 Website 📸 Instagram Tom’s work through Awakened Energy Healing and MiddleWave® focuses on meditation, healing, mental patterns, and developing a healthier relationship with the thoughts constantly competing for our attention. Thank you, Tom, for being willing to talk honestly about what happens when pushing harder stops working—and for reminding us that sometimes one of the strongest things we can say is: I need help. 🧭 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES👟 Website 📘 Facebook 📸 Instagram 𝕏 X 🎬 TikTok 🎧 Apple Podcasts Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts and continue walking with us through Season 24: Lost & Found. Every story is an invitation to hear another point of view and see life from a different perspective. 🧭 LEAVE US A REVIEWIf “Silence Mode” made you think about the noise in your own life, the things competing for your attention, or whether it might be time to stop trying to carry everything alone, we’d love to hear from you. 📝 Leave a Review Your words help more people discover Other People’s Shoes and the stories being shared each week. Thank you for walking in Other People’s Shoes. 👟🩵 Sometimes getting found starts by turning down the noise.

🎙 More to LifeSeason 24: Lost & Found | Guest: Mia Godfrey ⚠️ CONTENT WARNING: This episode discusses childhood trauma, abuse, addiction, grief, death, loss, and emotional pain. What if surviving is only the beginning? For much of Mia Godfrey’s life, survival was something she became very good at. Growing up in Romania under communist rule, Mia experienced poverty, trauma, instability, and pain at an early age. Alcohol eventually became one of the ways she learned to escape what she was carrying. But leaving one place does not necessarily mean leaving everything behind. Mia would experience profound loss, including the death of her first husband and later the illness and loss of her sister. Through grief, addiction, faith, therapy, and the difficult work of finally confronting what had been buried, Mia began discovering that simply getting through another day was not the same thing as truly living. Season 24 of Other People’s Shoes, Lost & Found, explores what happens when people lose something deeper than possessions—identity, purpose, hope, direction, faith, or the life they thought they would have—and what they discover as they begin finding a new way forward. For Mia, getting found meant becoming willing to look honestly at what she had survived, the ways she had learned to numb the pain, and the possibility that the hardest parts of her story could become something more than wounds she carried. The title “More to Life” is a nod to Steven Curtis Chapman’s More to This Life and to the question underneath this entire conversation: Is simply making it through life really all there is? Mia’s story suggests there is more. Welcome to “More to Life.” 🧭 GUEST INTRODUCTIONMia Godfrey is an author, speaker, Bible counselor, and life coach whose story has been shaped by trauma, addiction, grief, faith, healing, and starting over. Her memoir, Buried, Not Broken: A Memoir of Survival, Sisterhood, and Starting Over, grew from experiences Mia spent years carrying quietly and from a promise connected to her sister. Today, Mia uses her story to remind others that being buried beneath painful circumstances does not mean we are permanently broken by them. Sometimes the things we thought would remain hidden become the very things that help someone else feel less alone. 🧭 EPISODE DETAILSIn “More to Life,” Neil and Mia explore: 🇷🇴 Growing up in Romania under communist rule and the experiences that shaped Mia early in life 🍷 How alcohol became a way of escaping pain rather than actually processing it 🧳 Why changing circumstances or geography does not automatically leave trauma behind 💔 The devastating losses Mia experienced and what grief revealed about the pain she had been carrying 🎭 What happens when we become good at surviving while quietly struggling underneath the surface 🧠 The role therapy played in helping Mia confront things she had spent years trying to bury 🙏 How faith became part of Mia’s journey toward healing, purpose, and a different way of seeing her story 📖 Why telling the truth about her life eventually became Buried, Not Broken 🌱 The difference between being buried by circumstances and believing those circumstances have broken you 👟 What it means to move beyond simply surviving and begin asking what life can still become And underneath the entire conversation is a question that sits right at the heart of Lost & Found: What if finding your way forward does not require forgetting what happened but discovering that what happened does not get to decide what your life becomes? 🧭 MEMORABLE TAKEAWAYBeing buried is not the same thing as being broken. There are seasons when life can leave us feeling covered by grief, trauma, addiction, disappointment, or loss. But sometimes what feels like burial may actually be the beginning of something being planted. Survival can keep us here. Healing can help us discover why we are still here. And maybe that is where we begin finding that there really is more to life. 🧭 CONNECT WITH MIA GODFREY🌐 Mia Godfrey Website 📸 Mia Godfrey on Instagram 📖 Buried, Not Broken: A Memoir of Survival, Sisterhood, and Starting Over Learn more about Mia, her story, writing, coaching, speaking, and the message behind Buried, Not Broken. Thank you, Mia, for trusting us with the difficult parts of your story and for reminding us that what has been buried does not have to remain hidden and what has been hurt does not have to remain broken. 🧭 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES👟 Other People’s Shoes Website 📘 Facebook 📸 Instagram 𝕏 X / Twitter 🎬 TikTok 🎧 Apple Podcasts Subscribe to Other People’s Shoes wherever you listen to podcasts and continue walking with us through Season 24: Lost & Found. Every story is an invitation to look closer, listen longer, and see life from a different perspective. 🧭 LEAVE US A REVIEWIf “More to Life” made you think about something you have survived, something you have buried, or whether there might still be more waiting on the other side of what you have been through, we’d love to hear from you. 📝 Leave Other People’s Shoes a Review Your words help more people discover Other People’s Shoes and the stories being shared here each week. Thank you for walking in Other People’s Shoes. 👟🩵 Maybe getting found begins when we stop asking only how we survived and start asking what we are still here to become.

🎙 PermanentSeason 24: Lost & Found | Guest: Dean Sikes ⚠️ CONTENT WARNING: This episode discusses childhood sexual abuse, trauma, suicide, suicidal thoughts, and emotional pain. Sixty seconds can feel permanent. At 15 years old, Dean Sikes experienced sexual abuse. In the aftermath, he made himself a promise: he would never tell anyone what happened. He kept that secret for 22 years. The abuse was over in a moment.The silence lasted decades. Then an unexpected encounter with the person who abused him brought everything Dean had buried back to the surface. Season 24 of Other People’s Shoes, Lost & Found, explores what happens when people lose something deeper than possessions—identity, purpose, hope, direction, faith, or the life they thought they would have—and what they discover as they find a new way forward. For Dean, finding his way forward meant confronting something he had spent years trying not to face: what happened to him could not be changed, but it did not have to control the rest of his story. Today, Dean has spent more than three decades carrying a message of hope to young people around the world: You matter. But what happens when pain has been with you for so long that it begins to feel permanent? And can healing change what something means without changing what happened? Welcome to “Permanent.” 🧭 GUEST INTRODUCTIONDean Sikes is an author, speaker, and longtime advocate for young people who feel unseen, unheard, or without hope. Since 1993, Dean has spoken at thousands of events in schools, churches, Teen Challenge centers, prisons, and communities around the world, sharing the You Matter message with millions of people. His work centers on helping young people understand their value, confront hopelessness, discover purpose, and recognize that the painful chapters of their lives do not have to become the final chapters. Dean's message comes from more than three decades of ministry—but it also comes from his own experience with trauma, secrecy, shame, forgiveness, and healing. 🧭 EPISODE DETAILSIn “Permanent,” Neil and Dean explore: 🕰️ How an experience lasting only moments affected Dean for decades 🤐 Why Dean decided at 15 that he would never tell anyone about the abuse 🎭 What happens when we become skilled at hiding pain while appearing okay to everyone around us 🏠 The unexpected encounter with his abuser 22 years later that forced Dean to confront what he had buried 🧠 Why emotions we refuse to deal with can eventually begin dealing with us 🗣️ The importance of bringing hidden pain into the light instead of carrying it alone 🙏 The role Dean's faith played in his journey toward healing 🔓 Why forgiveness became connected to freedom without pretending that what happened was acceptable ❤️ Why Dean has dedicated his life to reminding young people that they matter 🌱 How something that shaped your story does not have to permanently define your identity And underneath the entire conversation is a question that sits right at the heart of Lost & Found: What if the thing you thought would mark you forever doesn't get the final word? 🧭 MEMORABLE QUOTE“You matter.” Two simple words. But for someone who feels invisible, ashamed, hopeless, or convinced that their story has already been written, they can mean everything. 🧭 CONNECT WITH DEAN SIKES🌐 Dean Sikes / You Matter | 🩵 You Matter | 🎧 The YouMatter Podcast Learn more about Dean's speaking, books, resources, and the You Matter mission to bring hope to young people and help eradicate hopelessness. Thank you, Dean, for trusting us with your story and for reminding people that what happened to them does not have to be where their story ends. 🧭 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok 🧭 LEAVE US A REVIEWIf “Permanent” made you think about something you have carried, something you have kept hidden, or the possibility that your past does not have to permanently define your future, we'd love to hear from you. 📝 Leave a Review Thank you for walking in Other People's Shoes. 👟🩵

🎙 Best FriendSeason 24: Lost & Found | Guest: Elke Scholz What if the person you spend the most time with is also the person you are hardest on? For Elke Scholz, anxiety wasn't always something she could easily identify or explain. It could show up as exhaustion, fear, self-criticism, overthinking, or simply the feeling that something wasn't right. And somewhere along the way came a painful description: your own worst enemy. But what happens when that relationship begins to change? Season 24, Lost & Found, explores what happens when people lose something deeper than possessions—identity, purpose, hope, direction, faith, or the life they thought they would have—and what they discover as they find a new way forward. In this conversation, Elke and I explore anxiety, the way we speak to ourselves, the importance of curiosity, and what it might mean to stop constantly fighting the person in the mirror. What would it look like to become your own best friend instead? 🧭 GUEST INTRODUCTIONElke Scholz is a registered psychotherapist, author, expressive arts consultant and educator, and EMDR therapist whose work centers around anxiety, resilience, creativity, and emotional well-being. Her professional experience gives her tools for helping others understand what is happening beneath the surface, but this conversation goes beyond credentials. Elke also shares from her own experiences and what she has learned about the relationship we build with ourselves. Because knowing how to care for other people doesn't automatically mean we know how to extend that same care inward. 🧭 EPISODE DETAILS🧠 Recognizing AnxietyAnxiety doesn't always introduce itself clearly. Elke talks about becoming aware of what is happening emotionally and physically instead of simply assuming something is wrong with us. 🗣️ The Voice We Live WithWe spend every day listening to our own internal dialogue. The question becomes whether that voice sounds like someone who is for us or someone constantly working against us. 🔎 Choosing CuriosityInstead of immediately judging a feeling, reaction, or difficult moment, Elke encourages curiosity. What is happening? Where is this coming from? What might I need right now? ❤️ Offering Yourself CompassionWe often give patience and grace to people we love while withholding those same things from ourselves. Becoming your own best friend doesn't mean avoiding responsibility. It means learning to respond to yourself with honesty without cruelty. 🎨 Finding Tools That HelpElke shares how creativity, expressive arts, awareness, and practical tools can help us process what we're carrying rather than simply trying to push it away. 👟 From Worst Enemy to Best FriendPerhaps getting found isn't always about discovering someone new. Sometimes it's about changing the relationship with the person who has been walking with you the entire time. 🧭 MEMORABLE TAKEAWAYThere is a difference between challenging yourself and constantly attacking yourself. A best friend doesn't tell you that everything you do is perfect. A best friend can tell you the truth, challenge you, encourage you, sit with you when things hurt, and still refuse to abandon you. Maybe we deserve to learn how to do some of that for ourselves. The person you've been fighting might also be the person you need to learn how to stand beside. 🧭 CONNECT WITH ELKE SCHOLZ🌐 Visit Elke Scholz | 📚 Explore Elke's Books | 🧠 Anxiety Warrior Project | ▶️ YouTube 🧭 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES👟 Websie | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok 🧭 LEAVE US A REVIEWIf this conversation gave you a different perspective, we'd love to hear from you. Your review helps more people discover Other People's Shoes and the stories being shared here each week. 📝 Leave a Review Thank you for walking in Other People's Shoes. 👟🩵 Maybe becoming found begins when you stop treating yourself like the enemy and start learning how to be your own best friend.

Get It...Season 24: Lost & Found | Steve Wormer What if confidence isn’t about convincing everyone else that you have it all together? What if it’s simply learning to believe that you’re worthy enough to take the next step? In this episode of Other People’s Shoes, I sit down with Steve Wormer, founder of the You Are Worthy Network, for a conversation about confidence, empathy, action, and what happens when we begin seeing value not only in ourselves, but in the people around us. Steve’s mission is to enlighten people, heal hearts, and bring hope into their lives. Through the You Are Worthy Network, he creates space for people to share their stories, reflect on what they’ve walked through, and hopefully discover that their story still has value. And maybe that’s where confidence begins. Not with arrogance. Not with having all the answers. But with knowing who you are and being willing to move. 🧭 Confidence or Arrogance?There’s a difference between believing in yourself and believing you’re better than everyone else. Steve and I unpack the line between confidence and arrogance, and how healthy confidence doesn’t require us to diminish another person in order to feel secure ourselves. Real confidence can actually make room for empathy. It allows us to listen, remain curious, and recognize that the person across from us is carrying a story every bit as important as our own. 🧭 Vision Needs MovementSteve shares a quote during our conversation that stopped me in my tracks: “Vision without action is simply hallucination.” We can dream. We can plan. We can talk about what we want our lives to become. But eventually, something has to move. The vision needs a step. And sometimes that step doesn’t have to be huge. 🧭 Baby StepsThat brought us to one of the great lessons from the movie What About Bob? Baby steps. You don’t have to fix everything today. You don’t have to know exactly where the road ends. Sometimes confidence looks like having enough courage to take one small step, and then another. Maybe getting found doesn’t happen all at once. Maybe we find pieces of ourselves along the way. 🧭 In This ConversationSteve and I talk about: The difference between confidence and arroganceWhy empathy creates genuine human connectionRecognizing your own worthTurning vision into actionWhy sharing our stories can help bring healingCreating spaces where people feel heard and valuedThe power of taking baby stepsHow confidence can change the way we move forward🧭 Connect With Steve WormerSteve is the founder of the You Are Worthy Network, where he works to uplift others by giving people a place to share their stories, heal, reflect, and encourage one another. 📘 You Are Worthy Network Facebook Community ▶️ You Are Worthy Network on YouTube 🧭 Follow Other People’s Shoes👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts 🧭 Leave Your FootprintIf Other People’s Shoes has encouraged you, challenged you, or helped you see life from a different perspective, I’d love for you to leave a review. ⭐ Leave Your Footprint Thank you for walking in Other People’s Shoes. 👟🩵 Sometimes the biggest change begins with the smallest step.

🎙 Fore! On a golf course, that word is a warning. Something is coming. Pay attention. Protect yourself. Get ready. But life doesn't always shout “Fore!” before something comes flying toward us. For Kym Coco, there was no way to fully prepare for losing her husband, Stephen “Steve” Thompson. After Steve became seriously ill, the two of them realized their time together was limited. Their priorities changed. Schedules became simpler. Mornings became sacred. They chose to spend the time they had loving one another and writing together. Steve's transition on November 24, 2023, changed the course of Kym's life. This season of Other People's Shoes, Lost & Found, explores what happens when we lose something deeper than possessions. Identity. Purpose. Hope. Direction. Faith. Even the life we thought we'd have. More importantly, we're asking what we discover as we begin finding a new way forward. For Kym, that road has included writing, movement, yoga, and a familiar place where you learn very quickly that not every shot goes where you planned: the golf course. So what happens when life doesn't give you a warning? When nobody yells “Fore!” before the thing that changes everything? And after the impact, how do you find the courage to take another swing?   🧭 GUEST INTRODUCTION Kym Coco has spent much of her life exploring the connection between the body, mind, and spirit. With bachelor's and master's degrees in sports kinesiology, Kym's search for optimal health eventually led her to yoga, where she discovered not only greater physical strength and balance, but a way to quiet an overactive mind. That journey also introduced her to Stephen “Steve” Thompson. Their friendship became a marriage in 2011, and together they traveled, taught, and shared what they were learning about living with greater clarity and purpose. Their work eventually became the book It Just Makes Sense: 7 Principles for a Joyful and Stress-Free Life. Kym later created Swagtail, blending her experience in kinesiology, yoga, business, and her love of golf. In 2021, she published The Flexible Golfer. Then life changed. Only months after the book's release, Steve became seriously ill. Knowing their remaining time together might be short, Kym and Steve intentionally shifted their lives toward what mattered most: each other. Today, Kym continues carrying what they built together while learning what it means to move forward without the person who had walked beside her for so many years.   🧭 EPISODE DETAILS 🕰️ What changed when Kym and Steve realized their time together was limited 🏌️ The role golf has played in giving Kym somewhere to keep moving, focusing, and finding herself again 💔 The difference between preparing for someone's death and actually living in their absence 🧭 What it means to find a new direction when the life you expected is no longer available to you 👣 How grief changes the way we walk without necessarily ending the journey   🧭 MEMORABLE TAKEAWAY “Sometimes life doesn't shout ‘Fore!’ before impact. It just happens, and then we have to decide how we're going to take the next step.”   🧭 CONNECT WITH GUEST 🌿 Swagtail | 📖 Miracle on the Mountainside: A True Story of Tragedy Transformed into Life's Greatest Gift Kym's newest book, Miracle on the Mountainside, honors Steve's bold life and the remarkable story they shared.   🧭 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts Subscribe to Other People's Shoes wherever you listen to podcasts and continue walking with us through Season 24: Lost & Found. Sometimes understanding another person's journey begins simply by being willing to walk in Other People's Shoes.   🧭 LEAVE US A REVIEW If Lost & Found has made you think differently about loss, grief, identity, or what it means to find your way forward, I'd love to hear about your experience with the season. ⭐ Leave a review for Other People's Shoes Your words help more people discover these conversations and remind us that none of us walks through life entirely alone.

🎙 Choose Your Hard Season 24: Lost and Found | Guest: Cory Young Would you rather is a dangerous game to play. So, let’s play. Would you rather give up walking or give up the hobby you’re most passionate about? For most of us, it’s just a question. For Cory Young, something close to that choice became his life. This season of Other People's Shoes, Lost and Found, explores what happens when we lose more than something we can replace. Identity. Purpose. Hope. Direction. Faith. Sometimes even the life we thought we'd have. Through each story, we’ll discover that being lost doesn’t always mean the story is over. Sometimes losing what we knew is where we begin to find who we’re becoming. At just 20 years old, a surfing accident left Cory paralyzed from the neck down. The odds were staggering: roughly a one-in-a-million chance of breaking his spine and about a one-in-one-hundred chance of being left with permanent spinal damage requiring a wheelchair. Cory didn’t choose the accident. He didn’t choose what came with it. But he still had choices to make. How do you choose your hard when hard has already chosen you? Welcome to “Choose Your Hard,” an episode of Lost and Found.   🧭 GUEST INTRODUCTION Cory Young is an inspirational speaker, mentor, coach, disability adviser, and advocate whose life changed dramatically after a surfing accident at age 20. In the years that followed, Cory faced addiction, depression, anxiety, PTSD, financial hardship, and the difficult process of figuring out who he was and what life could still become. Today, nearly three decades after his accident, Cory has built a life filled with purpose, marriage, travel, service, and a desire to help others navigate their own adversity. His vision is to create a global ripple effect of hope, emotional fitness, service to others, and a genuine love and appreciation of life.   🧭 EPISODE DETAILS In “Choose Your Hard,” Neil and Cory explore: 🏄 The surfing accident that changed Cory’s life at just 20 years old 🎲 The incredible odds surrounding the spinal injury that left him paralyzed 🥊 What it really means to choose your hard when the hard wasn’t your choice 🧠 Why finding a new perspective can be difficult, but necessary 🌊 Whether life truly goes on after a life-altering accident 🎯 How Cory began finding purpose again after losing the future he expected 👟 Why moving forward doesn’t necessarily mean getting back what you lost 🔥 How Cory continues to chase the feeling of being fully alive And underneath the entire conversation is a question that sits right at the heart of Lost and Found: When life takes something you never thought you would lose, how do you decide what is still worth chasing?   🧭 MEMORABLE QUOTE “Choose your hard.”   🧭 CONNECT WITH GUEST 📘 Facebook | 🎬 YouTube Learn more about Cory Young, his story, mentoring, speaking, growth mindset development, water safety advocacy, and his mission to create a ripple effect of hope and appreciation for life.   🧭 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts   🧭 LEAVE US A REVIEW If Lost and Found has made you think about something you’ve lost, something you’re still searching for, or the hard you’re making in your own life, we’d love to hear from you.   📝 Leave a Review Thank you, Cory, for sharing your story and allowing us to see life from a different perspective. Thank you for walking in Other People's Shoes. 👟🩵

🎙 Growth Season 23: The List | Guest: Greg Pihs What if forgiveness is something we have to grow into? All season long, The List has asked us to think about the names we carry. The people who hurt us. The people who disappointed us. The people whose names we might rather cross out than forgive. For our season finale, Greg Pihs brings us face-to-face with one of the hardest questions of the entire season: Can we grow beyond what someone did to us without pretending it didn't hurt? Greg's person on The List is someone many of us would find incredibly difficult to forgive. We're not going to tell you who. That's part of the story you need to hear for yourself. But much like so many conversations this season, Neil walks away wondering: How on earth do you forgive that? Welcome to “Growth,” the season finale of The List.   📝 GUEST INTRODUCTION Greg Pihs is a U.S. Marine veteran, NLP trainer, bestselling author, and founder of the 4th Dimension Mastermind. After surviving a deeply traumatic childhood and navigating life after multiple combat deployments, Greg dedicated his life to understanding the way our minds shape the reality we experience and how we can begin taking that power back. He is the bestselling author of The Power In The Pain and creator of Step Into Your Power. With this live breakthrough experience, participants confront limiting beliefs, including literally walking across fire. Today, Greg works with entrepreneurs, coaches, and leaders to help them reprogram their identity, own their stories, and build lives rooted in personal power.   📝 EPISODE DETAILS In “Growth,” Neil and Greg explore: 🌱 Why forgiveness may be something we grow into rather than arrive at overnight 🧠 How our beliefs and internal stories shape the way we experience pain 🎒 What happens when childhood trauma follows us into adulthood 🇺🇸 The impact of Greg's experiences as a U.S. Marine and multiple combat deployments 🔥 Why confronting limiting beliefs can require us to walk directly toward what scares us 👟 How we can acknowledge what someone did without allowing it to define the rest of our lives 📝 The person on Greg's list and the difficult road toward forgiveness 💭 What it means to develop a growth mindset around pain, hurt, identity, and healing 🌱 How our deepest pain can become part of our growth without becoming our identity And underneath the entire conversation is the question that has followed us throughout this season: What do we do with the names that are hardest to take off our list?   📝 MEMORABLE QUOTE “Maybe forgiveness isn't where growth ends. Maybe growth is how we get there.”   📝 CONNECT WITH GUEST 🌐 Website | 📸 Instagram Learn more about Greg Pihs, The Power In The Pain, the 4th Dimension Mastermind, and his work at Power In The Pain.   📝 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts   📝 LEAVE US A REVIEW If The List has challenged you to think differently about forgiveness, empathy, or one of the names you've been carrying, we'd love to hear from you. 📝 Leave a Review Twenty-three seasons have brought us here. We have talked about the names we write down, the names we hold onto, the names we struggle to forgive, and sometimes the hardest name of all: our own. Maybe we don't finish The List because every name suddenly disappears. Maybe we finish because we've grown enough to stop letting the list determine how we walk forward. Thank you, Greg, for helping us close this season with a conversation worthy of the journey. And thank you for walking through The List with us. Thank you for walking in other people's shoes. 👟🩵

🎙 WHY   SEASON 23: THE LIST Close your eyes for a moment. Only do that if you are not driving right now. How do you picture your forever? For Oriana Sparks, forever looked like sitting on a dock, sipping a beer, and growing old beside the man she loved. Then, only days after giving birth to their third child, her husband was tragically taken from her. The dream disappeared in a moment. The future she had pictured was gone. How do you rebuild after that? How do you forgive the person responsible for taking your forever away? And when life leaves you asking why, how do you learn to sit still long enough to hear what your heart truly needs?   📝 GUEST INTRODUCTION Oriana Sparks is a mindfulness facilitator, speaker, and coach based in Toronto. For more than 20 years, mindfulness has been her anchor through everyday stress and life’s deepest challenges. After becoming a widow only days after giving birth to her third child, Oriana turned to meditation, breathwork, fitness, and yoga. These practices became more than healthy habits. They became lifelines. Through grief, resilience, and rebuilding, she discovered a truth that now sits at the heart of her work: Self-love is not indulgence. It is discipline. And it is what gives us real freedom. With a B.A. in Psychology, a decade of experience in corporate communications, and certifications in yoga and mindfulness facilitation, Oriana blends the science of the mind with the practice of slowing down, becoming present, and learning to live again.   📝 EPISODE DETAILS In this episode, Oriana shares the future she once imagined and what happened when that vision was suddenly taken from her. She and Neil explore grief, forgiveness, mindfulness, self-love, and the difficult questions that do not always come with simple answers. Why did this happen? How do you forgive? How do you move forward without leaving the person you lost behind? And how do you slow down long enough to be honest about what really matters?   📝 MICRO PAUSES Oriana introduces the practice of taking small, intentional pauses before entering a meeting, conversation, or meaningful moment. Ask yourself: Why am I here, and what is truly important? What do I want to give in this moment? What do I want to receive? How do I want to feel? How do I want others to feel? These questions help us step out of autopilot and become more present with ourselves and the people around us. Sometimes healing does not begin with a big breakthrough. Sometimes it begins with one breath. One pause. One honest question.   📝 MEMORABLE QUOTE   “Self-love isn’t indulgence. It’s discipline, and it’s what gives us real freedom.”   📝 CONNECT WITH ORIANA SPARKS ✨ Visit Oriana Sparks Joy   📝  FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES Walk with us as we continue exploring the names, wounds, and questions we carry on The List. Sometimes the hardest question is not who hurt us. It is what we do with the life that remains. 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts   📝 LEAVE US A REVIEW Has Other People’s Shoes helped you see life from a different perspective? Your rating and review help more people discover stories that inspire empathy, growth, and understanding. ⭐ Leave a Review Share this episode with someone who may be walking through grief, forgiveness, or a season filled with unanswered questions. One story can change the way someone walks.

⚠️ LISTENER WARNING This episode contains a raw and detailed conversation about depression, grief, self-hatred, suicidal ideation, access to a firearm, and a specific suicide plan. It also discusses the death of someone by suicide. Some listeners may find this episode difficult or triggering. Listener discretion is strongly advised. If you or someone you know is struggling in the United States, call or text 988 or connect through the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Conversations are confidential, and support is available anytime, day or night. If someone is in immediate danger, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department. (988 Lifeline) 🎙 HATE MYSELF   Season 23: The List The hardest name on The List was mine. For years, I have sat behind this microphone and asked people to tell the truth about the hardest parts of their lives. This time, I handed the microphone to someone else. For the first time in the history of Other People’s Shoes, Dr. Amy Watson steps into the role of host. She asks the difficult questions, and I become the guest. There is no one else’s story for me to hide behind. One Sunday morning at the beginning of April, something inside me began to unravel. Depression, grief, shame, and self-hatred became a downward spiral. One week later, I was sitting in a hotel room in Portland, Oregon, confessing to my wife, Elizabeth, that I had made a plan to take my handgun and end my life. That sentence is difficult to write. It was even harder to say out loud. I borrowed the title Hate Myself from NF because those two words gave language to something I had been afraid to admit. The hardest person on my list to forgive was me.   📝 GUEST HOST INTRODUCTION Dr. Amy Watson is a trusted friend, a previous guest of Other People’s Shoes, and the host of Wednesdays with Watson. Through her work, Amy creates honest conversations about trauma, mental health, faith, healing, and the hope that can still be found after tremendous pain. (Wednesdays With Watson) In this episode, Amy does something no one has ever done before. She takes my chair. She becomes the host of Other People’s Shoes. With compassion, understanding, and a willingness to ask questions I might otherwise avoid, Amy helps me walk back into one of the darkest moments of my life. This time, I am the one being asked to walk honestly in my own shoes.   📝 EPISODE DETAILS In this deeply personal conversation, Amy and I discuss: The Sunday morning when my emotional spiral began The depression and grief I had been carrying quietly When suicidal thoughts became a specific plan Sitting in a Portland hotel room and finally telling Elizabeth the truth The fear and shame that made asking for help feel almost impossible What it was like to struggle while continuing to encourage other people Why I trusted Amy to take control of my show The role my faith played while I was struggling to hold on Why the hardest person on The List to forgive was myself The people and promises that reminded me there were still things worth living for This is not a polished story with an easy answer. It is a retelling of what happened when the person who normally asks the questions finally had to answer them. It is raw. It is vulnerable. It is real. Most importantly, I am still here to tell it.   📝 BEHIND THE TITLE The title of this episode was inspired by NF’s song “Hate Myself.” I did not choose it simply because it sounded dramatic. I chose it because it was honest. During that period of my life, I was not only fighting depression. I was fighting the belief that I was a burden, a failure, and someone who could not be forgiven. I have spent years encouraging people to believe that their stories matter. In this episode, I have to confront the fact that I had stopped believing my own did.   📝 THE STORY BEHIND THE ARTWORK The artwork for this episode was created for me as a gift by Amy’s friend, Hollis. Before we began recording, Amy told me that Hollis had died by suicide. That news forever changed the way I see this picture. What was already a meaningful representation of Other People’s Shoes now carries a weight I cannot fully explain. It reminds me that we do not always know what someone is carrying. It reminds me why conversations about depression, suicide, grief, and mental health cannot remain hidden behind shame. It reminds me that every pair of shoes holds a story, including the stories that ended before we were ready to say goodbye. We share Hollis’s artwork with gratitude for the gift she created and with tenderness toward everyone who knew and loved her. When I look at it now, I see a reminder that there are still people to reach for, truths to speak, steps to take, and things worth living for.   📝 MEMORABLE QUOTE “The hardest person on my list to forgive was me, because there were moments when I truly hated myself.”   📝 CONNECT WITH DR. AMY WATSON 🎙 Wednesdays with Watson 🎧 Wisdom From Watson 🤟🏼 Hand Model   📝 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES Every person has a story. Sometimes the story we most need to hear is the one someone is most afraid to tell. Thank you for giving me the space to tell mine. 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts   📝 LEAVE US A REVIEW   This was the most difficult episode I have ever shared. My hope is that telling the truth about my darkest moment will help someone else feel less alone in theirs. If this conversation encouraged you to speak honestly, ask for help, or check on someone you love, please consider leaving a review. Your words may help another person find this episode when they need it most. 📝 Leave a Review You may hate where you are. You may even hate yourself. But your life is still worth living. Please stay. Your story is not over.

🎙 PARTY Season 23: The List | Episode 400 Four hundred episodes. Four hundred conversations created through early mornings, late nights, searching for guests, recording stories, editing audio, and believing that empathy can change the way we see one another. First and foremost, I want to thank my wife, Elizabeth. Other People’s Shoes began because she inspired me to stop talking about starting a podcast and finally take the first step. I am grateful for every guest who has trusted me with their story and allowed us to walk in their shoes. I also want to thank Garrett for his dedication throughout the early years of the show. I want to thank someone we have not talked about nearly enough, Gary, who gave me the gift of teaching me how to edit. Unfortunately, he was unable to teach me how to enjoy editing, but I will always be grateful for what he taught me. Most importantly, I thank Jesus for being the Lord of my life and continuing to inspire me to walk with empathy, love people well, and follow in His sandals every day. Whether this is your first episode or your 400th episode with us, thank you for listening, supporting the show, and being willing to walk in other people’s shoes. Now, let’s get this Party started.   📝 GUEST INTRODUCTION Have you ever heard something on the radio that caused you to stop everything and immediately respond? Maybe it was an advertisement, a speaker, a song, or simply a sentence that arrived at exactly the right moment. For Shā Sparks, something she heard on the radio led her to grab a pen and begin writing on a napkin. That small act became a defining moment in her life. The power of a pen, a napkin, and a message she was finally ready to hear began changing the way she understood her voice, her pain, and her future. What started as a quiet moment of recognition eventually became a party of change. Shā Sparks is a Certified Fearless Living Coach, speaker, facilitator, award-winning podcast host, and author. She is the proud daughter of a Vietnam War veteran, the co-founder of The Makers Machine, and the CEO, or Chief Excitement Officer, of Sparks of Fire International. After spending years finding her own voice, Shā now helps leaders, veterans, and entrepreneurs reclaim theirs. She meets people where they are because she understands what it feels like to lose your voice and fight to find it again.   📝 EPISODE DETAILS In this milestone conversation, Shā and I explore what anger may be trying to reveal beneath the surface. Is anger always the real emotion, or is it sometimes the armor we place over hurt? Are we willing to become silent long enough to hear what our anger is trying to tell us? Is anger poison that slowly damages us? Is anger a mirror that reflects something unresolved inside us? Could anger become a teacher that points us toward healing, understanding, and change? Shā shares how recognizing the hurt underneath her anger helped her begin reclaiming her voice. She reminds us that transformation does not always begin with a grand announcement. Sometimes it begins with something as simple as hearing the right words, finding a pen, and writing on a napkin. The moment may appear small, but it could be the invitation that changes everything. Welcome to the Party. 📝 KEY TAKEAWAYS 🔥 Anger is often protecting a deeper hurt. 🔥 Silence can help us hear what our emotions are trying to communicate. 🔥 Anger can become poisonous when it is ignored, buried, or allowed to control us. 🔥 Anger can act as a mirror, revealing wounds that still need attention. 🔥 Anger can become a teacher when we are willing to listen and learn. 🔥 Finding your voice begins with believing your story deserves to be heard. 🔥 One small decision can become the beginning of lasting change.   📝 MEMORABLE QUOTE “Every hero needs a guide.”— Shā Sparks   📝 CONNECT WITH SHĀ SPARKS Learn more about Shā’s coaching, speaking, books, podcasts, and the work she is doing to help people reclaim their voices. 🌐 Website 📩 To book a free session with Shā, send her a direct message on Instagram. 📸 Instagram   📝 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES Every person has a story. Every story offers a different perspective. When we are willing to walk in Other People’s Shoes, we may discover something new about another person, ourselves, and the world around us. 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | ▶️ YouTube | 🎧 Apple Podcasts Listen, grow, and gain a different perspective on life by walking in other people’s shoes. 📝 LEAVE US A REVIEW Has Other People’s Shoes helped you see someone, or yourself, differently? Your rating and review help more people discover these conversations and remind listeners that they are not alone in what they are walking through. ⭐️ Leave Us a Review Thank you for helping us reach 400 episodes. Here’s to the next pair of shoes. 👟🩵

⚠️ CONTENT WARNING This episode contains candid conversations about depression, grief, suicidal ideation, and suicide. Please listen with care. This conversation reflects personal experiences and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are experiencing a suicidal crisis or emotional distress in the United States or its territories, call or text 988, or visit the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.   🎙 FLASHLIGHT Season 23: The List I did a quick Google search for the best flashlight on the market. According to Ava’s review, the LiteForce Flashlight is one of the most powerful and versatile handheld lighting solutions available. Its LED produces up to 20,000 lumens, and its zoomable beam can shift between a wide floodlight and a focused spotlight. It is compact, durable, rechargeable, and designed to provide light when someone needs it most. But this episode is not really about finding the best flashlight on the market. It is about recognizing when we need one. My guest this week, Patrick Lomantini, describes himself as someone who became a great liar. He lied to other people, created different versions of himself, and deceived those around him. But before many of those lies were spoken out loud, Patrick had already started believing the lies he told himself. “I’m fine.” “I have everything under control.” “It isn’t that dark.” “It isn’t that bad.” Maybe that is what makes darkness so dangerous. We can spend so much time convincing ourselves that we can still see clearly that we fail to recognize how far out of focus our lives have become. We adjust to the darkness. We hide what we are feeling. We keep walking as though we know where we are going. Until one day, we realize we cannot find our way out alone. Sometimes the most powerful flashlight is the truth. Truth exposes what we have been hiding. It brings the lies into focus, reveals how dark things have become, and gives us enough light to ask for help and take the next step.   📝 GUEST INTRODUCTION Patrick Lomantini is the author of The First Lie I Ever Told. Patrick openly shares how lying became part of the way he survived, performed, and presented himself to the world. He became skilled at deceiving others, but the deeper problem was that he had also become skilled at deceiving himself. Over time, those lies affected his identity, relationships, decisions, and the way he viewed his own life. Patrick’s story asks an uncomfortable question: What was the first lie you ever told yourself? Maybe it was a lie about who you needed to become. Maybe it was a lie about what success would give you. Maybe it was a lie about how much pain you could carry alone. Maybe it was simply: “I’m okay.” Patrick’s journey is not only about the lies he told. It is about what happened when those lies could no longer hold his life together. This is a story about deception, grief, depression, suicidal thoughts, survival, accountability, and the difficult work of bringing a life back into focus.   📝 EPISODE DETAILS In this episode, Patrick and I discuss: ✔️ The first lie Patrick remembers telling himself ✔️ How the lies we tell others often begin with the lies we believe about ourselves ✔️ Becoming so comfortable with deception that it begins to feel normal ✔️ The different identities Patrick created and performed ✔️ The difference between appearing successful and actually being healthy ✔️ Why we minimize our pain by saying, “It isn’t that bad” ✔️ Patrick’s experiences with grief, depression, and suicidal ideation ✔️ What happens when the performance can no longer hold everything together ✔️ Taking responsibility without allowing shame to become another prison ✔️ Why telling the truth can be the first step toward healing ✔️ Recognizing when we need help ✔️ Finding enough light to take one more step Throughout Season 23, we have been exploring The List. The names of those who hurt us. The people we resent. The people we blame. The people we struggle to forgive. Patrick’s story adds another difficult layer to that conversation: What happens when our own name appears on The List? How do we face the lies we told, the people we deceived, and the damage we caused? How do we accept responsibility while learning to forgive ourselves? And how do we rebuild a life after finally admitting that it is darker than we wanted anyone to know?   📝 MEMORABLE QUOTE “What is the first lie you ever told yourself?” Every lie we tell someone else may begin with a lie we have already accepted about ourselves. We tell ourselves that we need to perform to be accepted. We tell ourselves that telling the truth will cost too much. We tell ourselves that no one will understand. We tell ourselves that we can handle the darkness alone. But lies do not lead us out of darkness. They only convince us that we do not need a flashlight. The truth may not illuminate the entire road at once. It may not immediately repair every relationship or remove every consequence. But it can give us enough light to see where we are standing. Enough light to recognize the next step. Enough light to reach for someone else’s hand. Enough light to keep going.   📝 CONNECT WITH PATRICK LOMANTINI Learn more about Patrick, his story, and his work. 🌐 Patrick Lomantini’s Website | 📖 The First Lie I Ever Told | 🔦 KYLI   📝 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES   You do not need a flashlight when everything is already bright. You need one when the darkness has made it difficult to see what is true, where you are standing, and which direction you should take next. Sometimes that flashlight is a friend. Sometimes it is a counselor. Sometimes it is a spouse or family member. Sometimes it is a crisis counselor answering the phone. Sometimes it begins by finally saying: “It really is that dark, and I need help.” We may not be able to remove someone else’s darkness, but we can sit beside them, listen to them, and help them find enough light to take the next step. That is what it means to walk in Other People’s Shoes. 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts   📝 LEAVE US A REVIEW 📝 Leave a Review Did Patrick’s story challenge you to recognize a lie you have been telling yourself? Did this episode encourage you to stop minimizing the darkness and reach for help? Your rating and review help more people discover these conversations. Your words may help someone find a little light when they are struggling to see a way forward. 📝  Thank you for listening, sharing, and walking in Other People’s Shoes.

🎙 ANOTHER BRICK SEASON 23: THE LIST The third little pig built with bricks because bricks kept the wolf out. That is what walls are supposed to do. Protect us. But the same bricks that keep danger out can also keep everyone else away. In 1961, the Berlin Wall divided a city, separating friends, families, and loved ones for twenty-eight years. When it finally came down in 1989, it was dismantled one piece at a time. We build emotional walls the same way. One betrayal. One loss. One painful memory at a time. At first, the wall protects us. Eventually, it may keep love, trust, and healing from reaching us too. This week on Other People’s Shoes, Neil walks in the shoes of Ann Oickle, founder of Dynamic Living Lifestyles, for a conversation about grief, protection, and what it takes to slowly remove the bricks we have spent years putting into place. Not all at once. Just one brick at a time.   📝 GUEST INTRODUCTION Ann grew up with four brothers, but grief became part of her story before she was even born. While Ann’s mother was pregnant with her, she learned that two of her sons had a fatal illness that would eventually take their lives. Ann describes herself as a “stress baby,” carried by a mother already living with the weight of future loss. Ann was only five years old when one brother passed away. She was nine when she lost the other. Those early losses shaped how Ann understood family, safety, and connection. As more pain came through family members, coworkers, and others she trusted, Ann began building a wall around her heart. Each experience became another brick. The wall helped her feel safe. But eventually, it also kept people out.   📝 SOMETHING TO TAKE AWAY 👟 Will the painful things we experience define us, or can they refine us? 👟 Do we learn more from what we see for ourselves or from what others tell us? 👟 What can death, loss, and disappearance teach us about grief and healing? 👟 How do the threats we face shape the way we see ourselves, others, and the world around us?   📝 MEMORABLE QUOTE “Will what happened to us define us, or will it refine us?”   📝 CONNECT WITH ANN OICKLE Learn more about Ann, Dynamic Living Lifestyles, and the work she is doing to help people move from survival toward healthier, more connected lives. 📘 Facebook | 👥 Dynamic Living Community | 💼 LinkedIn   📝 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES Every person has a story. Every story offers a different perspective. When we are willing to walk in other people’s shoes, we may discover that the person behind the wall is not cold, distant, or uncaring. They may simply be protecting a heart that has already been hurt. 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts   📝 LEAVE US A REVIEW Has Other People’s Shoes helped you see life from a different perspective? Your rating and review help more people discover these conversations and remind listeners that they are not alone in what they are walking through. 📝 Leave a Review

🎙 POP SEASON 23: THE LIST Some names are difficult to forgive because of what someone did. Others are difficult because of everything they failed to do. For Terrence Newby, the hardest person on his list is his own father, a man whose addiction repeatedly came before having a relationship with his son. In this episode of Other People’s Shoes, Terrence opens up about growing up around addiction, watching drugs affect his father and other members of his family, and carrying those experiences with him into adulthood. Forgiveness does not erase what happened. It does not excuse the choices someone made. But it may decide how long those choices continue to shape our lives. Terrence also takes us inside Carolina basketball, shares what he learned from legendary coach Dean Smith, and answers one of the most impossible questions of all time: What exactly is a Tar Heel? 📝 GUEST INTRODUCTION Terrence Newby played four years of basketball at the University of North Carolina under legendary head coach Dean Smith. A talented and versatile guard, Terrence could play both the point guard and shooting guard positions. He was one of two seniors on the team alongside Ed Cota and helped provide depth after an injury to Ronald Curry. Terrence was also a strong perimeter shooter, a solid defensive player, and an exceptional all-around athlete who could have played Division I football or baseball in addition to basketball. During his time at Carolina, Terrence was part of three Final Four teams and shared the court with Tar Heel legends including Vince Carter, Ed Cota, Antawn Jamison, and many others. But behind the Carolina jersey was a son trying to understand why his father continued choosing drugs over having a relationship with him. 📝 EPISODE DETAILS In this episode, Terrence and Neil discuss: Growing up with a father who struggled with drug addiction Watching addiction affect multiple members of his family Why his father became the hardest person on his list to forgive The pain of wanting a relationship with a parent who continued making destructive choices The difference between forgiveness and pretending the damage never happened Playing four years of basketball at the University of North Carolina Being part of three Final Four teams Sharing the court with Vince Carter, Ed Cota, Antawn Jamison, and other Carolina greats Playing for legendary coach Dean Smith What made Coach Smith’s leadership different An unforgettable Dean Smith story The lesson Terrence carried with him long after leaving Chapel Hill How our response to a mistake can matter more than the mistake itself The answer to the nearly impossible question: What is a Tar Heel? 📝 MEMORABLE QUOTE Four things you do with a mistake: Recognize it. Admit it. Learn from it. Forget it. Coach Dean Smith taught his players four things to do with a mistake. The lesson was meant for basketball, but Terrence discovered that it applies far beyond the court. Recognize what happened. Admit your part in it. Learn what it came to teach you. Then stop allowing it to define you. 📝 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts 📝 LEAVE US A REVIEW Your review helps more people discover the show and join us in walking in other people’s shoes. 📝 Leave a Review

LISTENER WARNING Dr. Carron talks openly about being sexually abused. This episode also includes conversation around domestic violence, trauma, police brutality, and political violence. Please listen with care. 🎙 POSSIBLE SEASON 23: THE LIST   IS FORGIVENESS POSSIBLE WHEN THE COST IS HIGH? That is the question this episode sits with. Not cheap forgiveness. Not quick forgiveness. Not the kind that asks someone to pretend the pain did not happen. This week on Other People’s Shoes, Neil walks in the shoes of Dr. Carron Silva, whose life began in South Africa in 1966 and was shaped by deep trauma from a very young age. Her story includes sexual abuse, domestic violence, separation from her parents, police brutality, and the harsh reality of political violence under Apartheid. But this conversation does not stay in the pain. It moves toward healing. It moves toward freedom. It moves toward what is possible.   GUEST INTRODUCTION Dr. Carron is a forgiveness guide, coach, author, speaker, and retreat leader who helps people navigate emotional and betrayal trauma. Her story is not one of easy answers or overnight healing. Dr. Carron has walked through deep pain, and even today, her brain can still respond to certain situations through trauma responses. But she is no longer bound by anger. She is no longer ruled by bitterness. She is no longer carrying grudges against those who hurt her. That does not mean the trauma disappeared. It means freedom became possible. Today, Dr. Carron helps others through life coaching and half-day forgiveness retreats, both virtual and in-person. She teaches forgiveness as a practical life skill, not as a shallow phrase, spiritual shortcut, or emotional cover-up. Dr. Carron is also the author of With You Always: A Journey with Jesus, a devotional memoir that reflects her journey of faith through scripture, story, poetry, and reflection.   KEY TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE   THE WORD “AS” IN THE LORD’S PRAYER One of the most important moments in this conversation centers around one small word: “As.” “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” That word carries weight. It asks us to look honestly at the connection between the forgiveness we receive and the forgiveness we are called to extend. Not because forgiveness is easy. Not because the offense was small. But because forgiveness is part of the way Jesus teaches us to live free.   FORGIVENESS IS HARD WHEN THE COST IS HIGH Forgiveness sounds beautiful until the wound has a name. Until the story is personal. Until the cost is high. Dr. Carron’s story reminds us that forgiveness is not weakness, denial, or saying what happened was okay. Forgiveness is choosing not to let the people who hurt you keep holding the pen over the rest of your story. That kind of forgiveness takes courage, honesty, time, and sometimes walking through the same door of healing more than once. WHY DOES NELSON MANDELA FORGIVE?   Because Dr. Carron grew up in South Africa, this conversation also touches the larger pain of Apartheid, political violence, and the long road toward healing. That raises a powerful question: Why does Nelson Mandela forgive? After years of imprisonment and injustice, why not choose revenge? Why not hold onto hate? Mandela’s example reminds us that forgiveness is not only personal. Sometimes forgiveness becomes part of how people, families, and even nations begin to heal. It does not erase what happened. It does not remove the need for truth. But it can break the cycle of bitterness before bitterness becomes another prison.   WHAT DOES BEING WHOLE LOOK LIKE? What does being whole actually look like? Maybe being whole does not mean you never remember. Maybe it does not mean you never feel the pain. Maybe it does not mean your body never reacts to trauma again. For Dr. Carron, wholeness looks like freedom. A clear conscience. A heart no longer chained to grudges. A life no longer defined only by what happened to her. Being whole does not mean the wound was never there. It means the wound is no longer the whole story.   MEMORABLE QUOTE “My conscience is free, and I no longer carry grudges against those who hurt me.”   CONNECT WITH Dr. Carron WebsiteInstagramBook: With You Always: A Journey with Jesus   LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts   LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode encouraged you, challenged you, or helped you see forgiveness from a different perspective, we would be honored if you left a review. Your review helps more people discover Other People’s Shoes and continues the mission of building empathy by walking in other people’s shoes. 📝 Leave a Review Thank you for walking in other people’s shoes.