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Rating
4.8from
This podcast has
193 episodes
Language
EnglishPublisher
Lola PhoenixExplicit
Yes
Date created
2019/01/28
Latest episode
2026/10/09
Average duration
25 min.
Release period
15 days
Description
Non-Monogamy Help is a relationship advice podcast for people in non-monogamous or polyamorous relationships. With the help of a therapist with over a decade of experience, your host Lola Phoenix, answers the questions your questions about rules, hierarchies, unicorns and more.
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Episode 192 - Long Distance Priority
2026/10/09
A partner with a long-distance, hierarchical dynamic wonders if wanting dedicated phone calls and a family introduction is asking too much. It isn't.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 191 - Cheating, Not Polyamory
2026/09/25
Repeated cheating, gaslighting, and coerced sex get dressed up as non-monogamy. On telling the difference, setting a boundary, and when to bring in outside support.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 190 - Anxiety Misfiring
2026/09/11
Anxiety about a partner's other relationships isn't a malfunction. It's a fear shaped by a monogamy-centric upbringing. On self-compassion, control, and what you can actually manage.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 189 - Pre-Approving Partners
2026/08/28
A partner accused of cheating despite following the rules asks how much control is too much. On confronting, consenting, or cutting ties with a controlling agreement.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 188 - Coming Out Later
2026/08/14
A crumb seems like a feast to someone who's starving, but the meals you actually deserve change what you're willing to accept. That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 187 - Ex Becomes a Metamour
2026/07/31
Take the Beducated quiz and sign up with my link here: https://beduc.at/pd2627-lola
No relationship is inherently safer than any other, and trying to control every possible outcome only breeds the fear it's meant to prevent.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 186 - Communication Versus Gaslighting
2026/07/17
Telling someone they're wrong when they see withdrawal of affection is gaslighting-adjacent, even if unintentional.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by the BeMoreKinky app. BeMoreKinky is the leading app for helping couples in kinky or non-monogamous relationships to understand their kinks, communicate them with their partners, and organize play. Learn more at https://bemorekinky.com.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 185 - Relationship Anarchy and Autonomy
2026/07/03
Autonomy means freedom to make choices, but those choices have consequences for the people affected by them
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by the BeMoreKinky app. BeMoreKinky is the leading app for helping couples in kinky or non-monogamous relationships to understand their kinks, communicate them with their partners, and organize play. Learn more at https://bemorekinky.com.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 184 - Dating a Co-Worker
2026/06/19
Shrinking to make space in a partner's life only suffocates oneself and creates resentment that will eventually become unavoidable.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by the BeMoreKinky app. BeMoreKinky is the leading app for helping couples in kinky or non-monogamous relationships to understand their kinks, communicate them with their partners, and organize play. Learn more at https://bemorekinky.com.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 183 - Disclosure and Privacy in Polyamory
2026/06/05
Sometimes the best way to address fear of missing out is to invite partners to share new experiences, rather than tell them afterwards.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on Non-Monogamy Help.
This episode is sponsored by the BeMoreKinky app. BeMoreKinky is the leading app for helping couples in kinky or non-monogomous relationships to understand their kinks, communicate them with their partners, and organize play. Learn more at https://bemorekinky.com.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 182 - Permission in Polyamory
2026/05/22
Consideration means giving the reins over and allowing emotions to decide whether a partner is allowed to go on a date, which isn't fair.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on my website.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 181 - One P*nis Policies
2026/05/08
Allowing a partner's anxieties to control behaviour is unfair not only to oneself, but also to the people being dated.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on my website.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 180 - From Cheating to Polyamory
2026/04/17
Unresolved betrayal needs to be addressed before moving forward into polyamory, or it will easily become a tit-for-tat situation.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on my website.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 179 - Disability and Non-Monogamy
2026/04/03
Partners and friends can help with the admin burden of checking accessibility. That's what mutual aid is all about.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on my website.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Episode 178 - Relationship Anarchy for Newbies
2026/03/20
Two people could both be relationship anarchists and still not be compatible in terms of what they want or need out of a relationship.
That's what's on this week of Non-Monogamy Help. Find the full audio transcription of this episode on my website.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Check my affiliate link at https://betterhelp.com/nonmonogamyhelp for 10% off your first month.
Our discussion question this week came from the Odder Being Polyamory Conversation Cards. Pick up your own copy using my affiliate link and use NONMONOHELP at checkout for 10% off.
Music for this podcast has been provided by Chris Albery-Jones at albery-jones.com.
Email [email protected] with your question or record your question on nonmonogamyhelp.com/contact
Podcast reviews
Read Non-Monogamy Help podcast reviews
Justin Kalm 2023/03/29
Compassionate, Sensible Advice
Lola Phoenix’s podcast is an excellent supplement to their book, “The Anxious Person’s Guide to Non-Monogamy.” They help readers and listeners to feel...
for the bunnies 2022/12/30
Wonderful!
I adore the podcast! I just wish the episodes were longer, cause they’re so good! ✨
tghotefhu 2022/04/27
She’s a stalwart
Lola has a wealth of experience. I’ve followed some her work now for some years ( I think least 7). Really at the forefront of helping people carve...
curiousfae 2021/07/27
Wise and insightful
Finding this podcast has changed the way I think about non monogamy in such a positive and helpful way. I would go as far to say, it’s changed my life...
JasonHuntChicago 2021/05/23
Love
Your work!!
Dragonblossom 2020/12/31
You’ve Saved My Relationship
Lola, thank you. Your podcast and columns are helping me feel comfortable and ready to become non monogamous. I have mental health issues and that’s b...
Natynatslol 2020/09/18
Best podcast ever
I find your insights so wise and extremely helpful. I absolutely adore listening to these episodes and reading your column. You dispel so many myths a...
Kiwiiiii.1 2020/09/01
❤️
I absolutely love this podcast. I wish there were more polyamory podcasts like yours because most of the one I’ve found are really boring and not as i...
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