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Conor Gallagher is a successful businessman, author, and father of 17 children. But despite his success at work, he admits that for years, he was giving his best to his business while his family got the worst version of him. That realization led him to develop Well-Ordered Family, a system that applies proven business principles to family life. In this episode, Conor reveals how he manages his large family, reduces chaos, and creates a more peaceful, joyful home using practical tools that any family can adopt. In this episode, you'll learn: How Conor manages a household with 17 childrenWhy he believes families should operate more like businessesThe simple systems that reduce stress, chaos, and conflict at homeWhy busyness might be quietly destroying your familyHow to build a healthy family, even if you grew up in a broken oneIf you come from a broken or dysfunctional family and wonder whether you could ever build a happy, healthy family of your own, this episode is for you. Resources mentioned: Conor's books, videos, and family resources: https://wellorderedfamily.comJoin Restored's healing program: https://restoredministry.com/programGet It's Not Your Fault or download free chapters: https://restoredministry.com/booksListen to the full episode to discover the practical principles Conor uses to manage his family of 17 children—and how you can use them to build the family you want.

When Michael Comstock was 17, he discovered that his mom was having an affair. The betrayal didn’t just affect his parents’ marriage—it shattered his sense of safety, trust, and family. Years later, Michael realized the fallout was still affecting him. He struggled to trust women, sabotaged relationships, feared marriage, and wondered if he was doomed to repeat his parents’ story. In this episode, we talk about: Why a parent’s affair can feel like a betrayal of the children tooHow divorce wounds can surface years later in dating and relationshipsWhy Michael felt guilty building a relationship with his stepfatherWhat helped him forgive his mom and stepfather without excusing what happenedHow he went from fearing marriage to becoming a husband and fatherIf your parent cheated, if you struggle with anger or trust because of what happened in your family, or if you’re afraid you’ll repeat your parents’ mistakes, this episode is for you. Resources: Learn more about Restored’s healing program for young adults: https://restoredministry.com/program You can also anonymously share your story with Restored: https://restoredministry.com/story

Confident people still feel fear. The difference is how they respond to it. In this episode, Trevor Ragan explains why fear, anxiety, and discomfort don’t necessarily mean you’re weak, unprepared, or on the wrong path. In fact, trying to suppress those emotions can make them even stronger. Trevor is the founder of The Learner Lab and has spent nearly a decade studying learning, performance, resilience, and difficult emotions. He’s worked with professional and Olympic athletes, Major League Baseball teams, and leaders at the United Nations. In this episode, you’ll learn: How confident people handle fear differentlyWhy trying to eliminate fear can backfireHow to move forward even when you don’t feel readyWhy confidence isn’t the absence of difficult emotionsHow to build skills you may not have learned growing up If fear keeps you from taking risks, having difficult conversations, pursuing relationships, or building the life you want, this episode is for you. More resources: Join our 6-week healing program  https://restoredministry.com/program Free guide: 10 Tips to Help Someone Whose Parents Are Separating or Divorcing https://restoredministry.com/10tips Learn more about Trevor: https://thelearnerlab.com Shownotes https://restoredministry.com/blog/184

If you grew up in a broken or dysfunctional family, you may have entered adulthood without ever seeing what healthy conflict looks like. But avoiding conflict isn’t the answer. In fact, healthy conflict can be one of the main ways couples build trust, deepen intimacy, and discover whether they can actually build a life together. Our guest, Adam Lane Smith, is a former licensed marriage and family therapist, bestselling author, and attachment specialist whose work has attracted more than 1.3 million followers across social media. In this conversation, Adam breaks down the practical relationship skills many people never learned growing up. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why people from broken families often struggle in relationshipsHow healthy couples handle conflict differentlyWhy avoiding conflict can actually weaken trustWhat conflict reveals about whether someone is marriage materialHow to communicate, repair, and build trust after things go wrongIf conflict makes you shut down, blow up, people-please, or wonder whether you’re capable of building the healthy marriage you never saw growing up, this episode is for you. Resources mentioned in this episode: 👉 Join the waitlist for our new healing program for young adults impacted by their parents’ divorce or family dysfunction: RestoredMinistry.com/program 👉 Get the free guide: 10 Tips to Help Someone Whose Parents Are Separating or Divorcing: RestoredMinistry.com/10Tips 👉 Learn more from Adam Lane Smith, including his Secure Circle, relationship resources, programs, and coaching: AdamLaneSmith.com 👉 Shownotes https://restoredministry.com/blog/183

What if you’ve understood your wounds intellectually—but your body is still carrying them? After her parents’ divorce, Annie Sarlo spent years hiding her family’s dysfunction, struggling with anger, anxiety, perfectionism, and difficulty receiving love. Her healing eventually taught her something surprising: we’re wounded in relationship, and we often heal in relationship—but talking alone isn’t always enough. In this episode, Annie shares: Why safe relationships can heal wounds caused by broken relationshipsHow family dysfunction can make receiving love difficultWhy movement, martial arts, breathing, and nature became part of her healingThe path from self-knowledge → self-possession → self-giftHow to find a person or place where you finally feel safe enough to exhaleIf you’ve done a lot of thinking or talking about your past but still feel anxious, guarded, or stuck, this episode is for you. Resources: 👉 Learn more about Annie Sarlo and her whole-person coaching: anniesarlo.org https://sandamianocoaching.com 👉 Join the waitlist for our new healing program for young adults impacted by their parents’ divorce or family dysfunction: https://restoredministry.com/program  👉 Get the free guide: 10 Tips to Help Someone Whose Parents Are Separating or Divorcing: https://restoredministry.com/10tips  Shownotes

When dysfunction is all you know, it can feel normal. For Michaela, growing up with a narcissistic father meant fear, control, walking on eggshells, protecting her younger siblings, and even parenting her own parents. For years, she didn’t realize how unhealthy her family dynamics were. It wasn’t until she encountered healthy families that she began to see how different love could look. In this episode, Michaela shares how those relationships helped reshape her understanding of family, love, boundaries, and healing. We talk about: Why unhealthy family dynamics can feel normal when you grow up inside themWhat it’s like growing up with a narcissistic and controlling parentHow healthy families and mentors can show you a different way to loveHow to stop carrying responsibility for everyone around youWhy forgiveness doesn’t always require reconciliationIf you grew up with a narcissistic, abusive, or deeply dysfunctional parent and want to build something healthier, this episode is for you. Resources Mentioned Free Guide: 7 Ways to Work Through the Pain of Your Parents’ Divorce Book: It’s Not Your Fault Share Your Story with Restored

Divorce is traumatic for children at every age—but parents can either deepen that wound or help their children heal. In this conversation, licensed clinical social worker and psychoanalyst Erica Komisar explains why a “good divorce” requires parents to stop focusing on what feels fair to them and start prioritizing what their children actually need. She shares practical ways to create stability, reduce emotional damage, and protect children from being pulled into adult conflict. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why frequent transitions between homes can destabilize childrenHow to tell children about a divorce without overwhelming themWhy parents must avoid oversharing, badmouthing, and using children as messengersHow a parent’s emotional regulation affects a child’s ability to copeWhy flexibility, sacrifice, and stability matter more than rigid ideas of fairnessIf you’re divorced, considering divorce, or trying to help your child adjust to a family breakup, this episode is for you. Learn more about Erica Komisar, her books, and her work Get the free guide, “7 Ways to Work Through the Pain of Your Parents’ Divorce” Get the free guide, “10 Tips to Help Someone Whose Parents Are Separating or Divorcing”

If your parents are divorced and seeking a Catholic annulment, it can feel confusing — and even scary. What is an annulment? Is it just “Catholic divorce”? Does it erase your parents’ marriage? And the question many children of divorce are afraid to ask: Does this mean I’m illegitimate? In this episode, I’m joined by Anthony St. Louis-Sanchez, JCL, Director of the Metropolitan Tribunal of Denver, to explain what annulments are, how the process works, and what they do — and do not — mean for the children of divorced parents. In this episode, we discuss: What a Catholic annulment actually isWhy an annulment is not the same thing as divorceWhether an annulment makes children “illegitimate”How the annulment process worksHow to cling to Christ when your family story feels confusing or painfulIf you’re a child of divorce who has ever wondered what your parents’ annulment means about your family, your identity, or your worth — this episode is for you. Free guide: 7 Ways to Work Through the Pain of Your Parents’ Divorce Book: It’s Not Your Fault Restored resources Book Anthony recommended: When Is Marriage Null? by Paolo Bianchi Shownotes

When your parents’ divorce or separation hurts deeply, it can raise painful questions about God: Where was He when my family fell apart? Why didn’t He stop it? And if faith matters so much, why didn’t it save my family? In this episode, Joey talks with Dr. Daniel Meola, co-founder of Life-Giving Wounds, about suffering, anger, grief, spiritual bypassing, and the struggle many adult children of divorce face in their relationship with God. They discuss: Why divorce can feel like abandonment by GodWhat to do when faith was used to minimize your painWhy anger and grief aren’t signs of weak faithHow to avoid getting stuck in victimhood or spiritual bypassingWhy acknowledging your pain may be the first step toward healingHow God can transform wounds into strength, love, and purposeIf you’re an adult child of divorce or separation who has ever asked, “God, where were You when my family fell apart?” this episode is for you. Learn more about Life-Giving Wounds Get the book Life-Giving Wounds: A Catholic Guide to Healing for Adult Children of Divorce or Separation Get Joey’s free guide, 7 Ways to Work Through the Pain of Your Parents’ Divorce: Get Joey’s book, It’s Not Your Fault Subscribe to the Restored podcast: Get the Book: Searching for and Maintaining Peace: A Small Treatise on Peace of Heart Get the Book: Interior Freedom Show notes

When your family breaks apart, especially through years of fighting, manipulation, or emotional chaos, you can learn to survive by staying busy, shutting down, or pretending it didn’t affect you. But what happens when that pain starts showing up in your marriage, your parenting, your confidence, or the way you handle conflict? In this episode, Billy shares how her parents’ long, painful divorce began after years of intense conflict, manipulation, and isolation. She opens up about coping through overachievement, the safe adults who helped her heal, and the boundaries she’s had to learn with an unsafe parent. We discuss: Why Billy expected her parents to divorce, even as a childHow she coped by becoming highly involved, successful, and busyThe loneliness of growing up without safe adults nearbyHow one pastor’s wife helped her feel truly loved for the first timeWhy journaling helped her process, remember, and healHow her husband helped her learn to handle conflict without fearWhat boundaries with a parent can look like as an adultHow Billy is building a healthy family, even though she didn’t come from oneIf you’ve ever wondered how to honor your parents without letting them control you, or how to build something healthier than what you came from, this episode is for you. Resources Mentioned: Share Your Story with Restored:  https://restoredministry.com/story 7 Ways to Work Through the Pain of Your Parents’ Divorce or Separation: https://restoredministry.com/7ways The Gottman Institute:  https://www.gottman.com/ Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts by Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott: https://amzn.to/3PPRy9J The Anatomy of Peace by The Arbinger Institute: https://amzn.to/4aEsBVE Show notes: https://restoredministry.com/blog/177

When a parent cheats, it doesn’t just wound the marriage. It can wound the children too. For many young people from broken families, infidelity creates a terrifying fear: What if I get cheated on too? Or worse, what if I become the one who cheats? In this episode, Joey talks with marriage and family therapist Doug Hinderer about how affairs happen, why betrayal damages a child’s ability to trust, and how young people from broken families can avoid repeating their parents’ mistakes. They discuss: Why affairs often begin long before anything physical happensHow infidelity affects children, even years laterWhy love feels unsafe after betrayalThe role of forgiveness in healing from a parent’s affairHow to talk about the fear of infidelity in dating or marriageThe three habits that help build a faithful, lasting marriageWhy you are not doomed to repeat your parents’ storyIf you’re afraid of being cheated on, afraid of becoming your parents, or unsure if lasting love is even possible after what you witnessed growing up, this episode is for you. Restored Resources It’s Not Your Fault | Restored Book Happy Marriage for Life | Doug Hinderer Marriage Unhindered | Relevant Radio How to Forgive | International Forgiveness Institute “Impossible” Marriages Redeemed: They Didn’t End the Story in the Middle | Leila Miller “Impossible” Marriages Redeemed | Amazon Doug Hinderer’s email [email protected] Shownotes

When your family breaks apart, anger makes sense. But if it has nowhere to go, it can turn into bitterness, depression, addiction, relationship fear, and despair. In this episode, Autumn shares how her parents’ divorce, her father’s infidelity, generational dysfunction, and sexual abuse shaped the way she saw men, love, marriage, God, and herself. She opens up about the rage she carried, her struggle with pornography addiction, suicidal thoughts, and the fear that she was doomed to repeat her parents’ mistakes. But her story does not end there. Autumn also shares how faith, writing, friendship, therapy, forgiveness, and a healthy marriage helped her heal and build a life that looks completely different from the brokenness she came from. In this episode, we discuss: Why anger after divorce is often a response to real loss and injusticeHow divorce can feel like a death, even when it was “necessary”Why fear of repeating your parents’ mistakes is so commonHow pornography addiction can be connected to deeper woundsWhat Autumn learned to look for in a spouseHow she forgave her father without pretending the hurt didn’t happenWhy your parents’ divorce is part of your story, but not your identityIf you’re from a broken family, angry about what happened, afraid of repeating your parents’ story, or wondering if healthy love is even possible for you, this episode is for you. Share Your Story Get the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your Fault

What if the person you fall for isn’t just a choice, but a pattern? Most people think love is about chemistry, attraction, or finding “the one.” But according to today’s guest, the heart alone is not enough. If you come from a divorced or dysfunctional family, your wounds can shape who you trust, who you’re attracted to, and what feels “normal” in a relationship. Without realizing it, you might be drawn to someone familiar, not because they’re good for you, but because they feel like the past. In this episode, we explore how to build love with both your heart and your head. We talk about repetition compulsion, red flags, rushing trust or physical intimacy, and how to tell whether someone is actually capable of healthy love. My guest is Dr. John Van Epp, relationship expert, counselor, and author of How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk. If you’ve ever wondered, “Why am I attracted to people who aren’t good for me?” or “How do I avoid repeating my parents’ marriage?” this episode is for you. Get our book Check other free resources: How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk by Dr. John Van Epp: Love Thinks Head Meets Heart course: Shownotes

In this episode, I mentor three people LIVE through the problems they’re facing in their broken families: One caller asks how to deal with a dad who avoids the reality of his divorce, and whether it’s his place to confront him or let that battle go.Another asks a question people are afraid to say out loud: Can I actually heal? And if so, how does healing really happen?And finally, a young woman opens up about starting her first relationship while watching her divorced parents repeat unhealthy patterns, and asks, “Who do I go to for relationship advice when my parents haven’t modeled a healthy relationship themselves?”If you’ve ever felt torn, stuck, or unsure how to navigate the pain and dysfunction of your broken family, this episode is for you.  View details for Healing Retreat May 1-3 in Philly Ask a question anonymously on the show Get Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to Avoid Get the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your Fault Shownotes

At 14 or 15 years old, Celeste learned her parents’ marriage was unraveling. Affairs. Addiction. Secrets. Her siblings didn’t know. But she did — because she was the oldest daughter. And before long, she wasn’t just watching the marriage fall apart… she was managing it. In this episode, Celeste shares what it was like to grow up as the “third parent” in a family where divorce was unthinkable — and what that responsibility did to her nervous system, her faith, and her ability to trust. We talk about: Carrying secrets to protect the family’s imagePanic attacks and anxiety that she didn’t know how to nameThe guilt of moving away and “leaving siblings in a burning building”Why even a “necessary” divorce still deeply wounds childrenAnd why dating now triggers intense anxietyCeleste’s story is honest, raw, and hopeful. Because while you can survive being the third parent… At some point, you have to stop carrying everyone else. If you were the responsible one… If you feel guilty for wanting your own life… If anxiety follows you into relationships… Or if you’re afraid you’ll repeat your parents’ marriage… This episode is for you. Suicide Hotline: Call or Text 988 (English or Spanish) Share Your Story Get the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your Fault Get Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to Avoid Watch the Documentary: Kenny Watch the Trailer: Kenny (3:31 min) Shownotes