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Chris is getting married on Friday. More important, though: He might be getting Sirius for an entire year. Jarrod has him ready to go. They talk about Shark Tank and watch some Vines. Jarrod gets kicked out of the Goodwill store for a day -- because he's 12 -- and Chris predicts he'll be a big baby on his special day.

You've got to be 16 years old to get a driver's license in Pennsylvania. But no one ever said you had to be emotionally mature. Ride along with Jarrod while he plays The Jimmy Game and listen to Chris ruin a woman's life by spite-driving. Plus they discover the true winner of Madden football. Also, a friendly tip for the fans: If you plan on listening to Bush around middle-aged dads, wear protection. You'll be glad you did. 

The boys are alone with their thoughts and you're gonna hear all of them. Chris and Jarrod brainstorm a Three's Company reimagining and an idea for an Al Pacino movie. Jarrod dreams of one day having his own gas station and Chris would be the most considerate wrestler to ever take his spot in the ring. Plus they get political. It's got everything Manny ... What's-His-Name wants. 

Erick Sanchez and Rob Cibik return to the podcast to discuss their favorite fast-food places, gas stations and just how much child abuse is too much child abuse. Jarrod dives deep on pizza and knows where to find the best sushi. Erick got spit on by his friends, but it's all right because he had his weed-scented pencil. Rob saved a Chuckie doll from suffocating in a hot car.  Chris' mom finds her national pastime and it's called abandonment and neglect. 

The phone lines are open. For now. You people are weird, so it might not last much longer. Chris and Jarrod didn't feel like doing the work, so they put it on you. They had good reasons, though. Chris learned his booty is "looking so biiiiig" and Jarrod is been watching We Own This City and learning to offend a new region with an attempt at an accent. Plus he compares The Wire to the Andy Griffith Show. Take that, Baltimore. 

Mike O'Donnell came to Phantom Power to talk wrestling, guns and the glitzy history of the military with Jarrod and Chris. Jarrod missed a murder on TikTok, but he knows all about Elvis Aaron Presley now. Mike's roommate and podcast co-host, Manny Santiago, lost a near-fatal bet about a cake. Chris is afraid of video games. But don't worry because Rob Riggle is going to protect them all. 

Kyle Shahan joins Chris and Jarrod and the three of them talk about farming, French people and Pennsylvania Dutch. Jarrod unveils the test of true love -- and it involves a canoe. Chris believes women actually belong in the gaming community, ultimately jeopardizing his standing within the gaming community. Will this be the time Kyle's podcast episode finally airs? Are you reading this? Then yes, you idiot. 

Did you ever wonder how tall Metallica is? Of course not. You've got better things to think about. That's why you've got Riffbusters. Does Simple Plan feel awkward singing "I'm Just a Kid" minutes after signing up for AARP membership? Who showed up at Jarrod's comedy show? Is Zach Braff really an a*****e? Jarrod and Chris discuss. 

Jarrod and Chris are back in person and at it again -- this time in song form. Is it Kenny Loggins? Is it Don Henley? Is it Jim Croce? Eh. Whatever. It really doesn't matter because we're exploring Chris' prostate in this one. They rename the cream pie and have a unique vision for the future. 

Antonio is back with the guys and Chris teaches him all about aphantasia while Jarrod eats trail mix and waits for the noise to stop. Chris accuses Jarrod of having skinny privilege. Jarrod takes a hard stance against Target fashion and accuses Chris of having an affliction simply for attention. To be fair: Who gets lost in a Buffalo Wild Wings? 

Antonio joins Jarrod and Chris from Arizona to talk about gaming and Taco Bell. Jarrod reveals the whitest Subway order of all time and they develop a new use for the pocket protector, specifically targeted for the fitness-challenged person. Plus the crying native American is Italian? The horror.

The guys are back and, well, they're pretty much the same. Is Madonna still sexy at 63? Why did Betty White die? Do you want to hear Hank Hill rap? How about we have a Mumford & Sons sing-along? The answer to all of these questions is yes. Especially the one about Betty White. All that and a hot tip on a new magazine.