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Welcome to the Different Skill Notebook Podcast, hosted by Ana Anselma, a smart parenting tool empowering families with vital life skills. In this episode, Ana delves into a transformative approach at the Social Mind Center's Brick Club, where listening first strengthens relationships with neurodivergent and autistic individuals. Reflecting on years of experience, Ana shares how listening and removing expectations create an environment where trust and connection thrive. Listen to inspiring stories of new members like Brian, who overcame past challenges and embraced active participation through the thoughtful and flexible orientation process at Brick Club. Anna reveals how enabling these individuals to take the lead reduces anxiety and fosters engagement and learning. This episode highlights the importance of connecting before teaching and how trust paves the way for meaningful interactions with children. Gain insights on ensuring parents and children feel welcomed, understood, and respected without the pressure of performance during their first visit to the Brick Club. Discover the powerful impact of listening and choice-making in nurturing a supportive and inclusive community.   https://www.socialmindcenter.com/different-skill-notebook-blog/listen-to-neurodivergent  

Welcome to the Different Skill Notebook Podcast, hosted by Ana Anselma, co-owner of the Social Mind Center and an educational consultant. In this episode, Ana delves into the crucial topic of social communication and autism, exploring why it's essential to equip neurodivergent individuals with the skills to communicate their thoughts, needs and desires more effectively. Ana shares insights from her extensive experience, including the consistent narratives from parents seeking help for their children who struggle with social communication despite years of behavioral therapy. She highlights the gap in the school system's approach, which often focuses on minimizing behaviors rather than building communication and self-advocacy skills. Through the story of the Social Mind Center's inception and its mission to provide real-time interaction and practice for children, Ana emphasizes the importance of teaching social communication skills. She outlines the strategies and approaches used at the center, such as social groups, modeling, and understanding the perspectives of individuals on the spectrum. Join Ana as she provides valuable insights into social communication, its significance, and practical ways to support neurodivergent individuals in developing these vital skills. Stay tuned for the next episode, where she will discuss cognitive flexibility and its role in perspective-taking. For additional information, definitions, and references, visit the blog at socialmindcenter.com. Feel free to comment or ask questions on the different skill notebook blog, and Ana will be happy to respond. Thank you for tuning in, and we look forward to our next podcast!

In this episode, Melissa Pascucci shares her success finding and pursuing a profession she loves.  Melissa shares the steps she took to help find her new career.  Melissa never stopped attending events at her school, Marino Campus.  She participated in all professional and community events hosted and promoted by the Dan Marino Campus.  She emphasizes the importance of pursuing learning and growth.  She says that one must stay connected to the community.  Attending events helps you to make new connections with people that can help you find a career that is your passion.  Melissa also stressed the importance of volunteering to obtain experience and exposure.  Melissa connected with a mentor, Gabriella Procci, whom she met through a program Dan Marino Campus had started called the Academy.  The Academy offered continuing education for graduates of the Dan Marino program.  This mentor encouraged Melissa to pursue working with the neurodivergent population.  Gabrielle recommended Melissa for an internship at the Social Mind Center.  The Social Mind Center had not had this type of internship before; we were sure we could all learn from each other.  Melissa started as a paid intern at the Center, coming several days a week to assist in social communication groups.  She would shadow Dr. Savinelli in social groups.  It modeled running a social group, which requires lesson planning, teaching strategies, and promoting opportunities for the kids to engage and connect. There is also the part of managing the sticky situations that arise.  Melissa learned to help children/teens to cope with stressful situations.  Melissa also became a moderator with the Brick Club (Brick-by-Brick Programme).  Becoming a moderator for Brick Club required her to complete a course and additional hands-on training running a group.  The internship gave Melissa a preview of what a career working with a neurodivergent community may be like.  It allowed her the opportunity to experience teaching and managing a group.  We both agreed that the best possible experience to determine your career path is exposure to different opportunities to observe and work in a field of interest, as an intern or even a volunteer.   

In this episode, Melissa shares her journey after high school to find her place and purpose in the world.  Her employment experiences and career ambitions.  Her story is one of perseverance and hope. She expresses the need for autistics to be consistently exposed to different experiences and opportunities.  This helps them to figure out what may be the best fit for them.  She says independence for autistics requires their parents to allow them to do life their way.  There are multiple pathways to finding one's place and purpose in life.  Parents must believe in their children's ability to find their way.  Autistics may need more time and different opportunities to find their path.  Melissa was candid on how parents can be too controlling and struggle to listen and respect their autistic young adult as an individual—respecting that they may have different desires than you.  Also, to respect that they may know autism best, so their perspective and voice matter.  Melissa continues to advocate for herself and her students.  She deeply desires to help autistic people find a career they love and self-realize.  As an advocate, she believes in and encourages her students.  She emphasizes how parents can support new experiences, listen, and respect their young adult.  In our next episode, Melissa will share her internship at the Social Mind Center and her new career.       

Before the term neurodiversity and neurodivergent came to be, I used the term autism mind. My son taught me 18 years ago that autism was a different kind of mind. He had a different process in which he approached his daily life. I realized the strategy was to equip him to navigate the neurotypical world. I taught him how the neurotypical world worked. How does the world work, and what does it expect of you? I taught him the neurotypical perspective, and he showed me the autism mind perspective. My most appreciated aspect of his process was to take breaks. From age three, he understood what he needed; he just needed words to express his needs. His process and pace influenced mine. I learned that you can still get plenty done at a slower pace. Thanks to him, I changed my pace and learned to live in the moment rather than my days defined by a list of tasks.  We bridged the gap between his process and the neurotypical expectations with strategies to help them adapt. There is more than one pathway to learning and living. Both Gaby and Nick needed strategies to help them navigate their school days. Gaby required more information to manage her anxiety, and Nick needed breaks throughout the day to sustain attention and stay on task. Eventually, Gaby learned to locate the additional information she needed, and Nick learned to get through the day without breaks.    We devised ways for them to meet their needs and work through the neurotypical expectations. And it was okay if they could not meet the neurotypical expectations, especially when the NT person was dealing with had no compassion and was highly rigid. Together we learned different ways to get things done. We learned together. I hope the information in this episode will help you help your child thrive.   More often than not, my children would not meet the neurotypical expectations. Amazingly enough, you can still thrive without meeting neurotypical expectations.        

      Seventeen years ago was the first time I heard the word autism. This episode shares the events that lead me to seek an evaluation for my son.  How did I know my son needed an evaluation? What did I do when I heard the word autism?  This series of episodes will discuss the start of my journey in seeking to know autism. Reflecting on what I have learned from my children and thousands of other children. This past year, I believe there has been a significant pivot in my perspective in advocating and educating autistics to be independent and self-realize their dreams. Ana Anselma         

    In this episode, Gaby Anselma joins us again to continue our conversation on anxiety. We discuss medication as a tool to deal with anxiety symptoms. Some of the other points discussed in this episode:  Medication is a tool, not a total solution to anxiety management. When do you decide to take medication?  What are some of the symptoms or signs that lead one to consider medication?  clouded thinking frozen and unable to act How can medication help you?  Stop the extreme symptoms and  Allow you to explore the source of your anxiety more and use coping strategies to manage your anxiety Understand that some of us are wired to worry When the medication started helping manage my anxiety, I could better plan and expand my activities to manage my anxiety. Anxiety impacts your ability to think clearly.   How did tennis help me understand and manage my anxiety?  Help you understand how your thinking drove my anxiety How I would self-sabotage my tennis game What was your breakthrough for you in managing your anxiety?  Understanding that your thinking can heighten your anxiety Sometimes our anxiety is physiological. Your body is anxious outside of your thinking Do you believe medication helped you gain the skills to manage your anxiety effectively?    When did you stop taking medication?    How do you manage your anxiety now?    Thank you for listening.    www.socialmindcenter.com  

  Considering medication for your child is a serious decision. In this episode, we discuss the different factors and considerations involved. 1. Does your child/teen struggle with?  Attending or focusing Anxiety Self-regulation - organizing mind and body to achieve goal-directed behavior Emotional regulation Irritability Impulse control Cognitive inflexibility- restrictive behaviors Depression   2. Do these symptoms impact their quality of life and ability to navigate daily activities?   Most notably, are these symptoms/behaviors a barrier to learning?    3. What is the intensity and frequency of the symptoms impacting your child?    4. What systems are in place in your child's home and learning environment to help minimize these symptoms and struggles?  0rder, structure, and predictability Consistency  Individual Education Plan IEP Smaller classroom  Individualized instruction/tutoring Interventions/coaching focusing on skills to cope and manage symptoms   5. Journal as many details relating to the symptoms and the impact on daily activities. Specifically, document the frequency and intensity of symptoms and behaviors. Have someone else observe your child in the classroom to assist you in gathering data.    6. Consult with either?  Behavioral Pediatrician Psychiatrist Neurologist   7. Pursue diagnostic evaluation with a psychologist to seek the source of symptoms and behaviors.  Spending some time reflecting and examining the information from the above list can help you make a more informed decision. Sometimes the answer to improving your child's quality of life and learning is more related to implementing systems, building coping skills, and altering their environments. Medication is a tool that should be combined with other tools to increase success. Medication is not a tool that teaches skills. It alleviates barriers to learning.   

Healing  and Managing your Anxiety!   This is our second episode in the series of Anxiety Management. In this episode Gaby discusses what her anxiety looks like now in college. She has dealt with anxiety most of her life. In every season it looks different.  Gaby discusses what her anxiety feels like and how it impacts her thinking and effectiveness on a daily basis. Then she details for us 5 different strategies that have helped her cope with the anxiety.  Understanding whether your anxiety is significantly impacting your quality of life is an important place to start. Gaby also discusses the importance of seeking help to make this determination as anxiety impacts your clarity of thought.  Gaby shares how counseling has helped her understand her anxiety throughout her life and how to manage it to have a more fulfilling life.  Please join us as we explore anxiety management in teens and young adults.   

WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT SOCIAL SKILL? When I think about our work at the Center teaching social competency, there are many layers to teaching these skills. For those who have social communication skills come easy. We never give much thought to what it feels like for those who struggle with social, emotional, communication, and self-management skills. If I were to pick one most important skill in developing social competency, that would be turn-taking. All socialization and communication is a back and forth. Children with social competency difficulties can struggle with this with fundamental skills. There is no social interaction that does not require turn-taking. Social-emotional reciprocity is the back and forth interaction that takes place in communication. (Norris, 2018) We take a social approach to have conversations with others, and we share our interests in our discussions. Part of that social-emotional reciprocity is knowing how and when to initiate or respond to others' social interactions (Norris, 2018). Some of the skills necessary to engage in social-emotional reciprocity include: Waiting for a turn to speak in school or meeting Talking to someone Making eye contact Demonstrating something Writing a note, email, etc. These are all examples of back and forth in communication and social situations. Turn-taking and waiting are fundamental skills to navigate every day in our communities. Turn-taking should be incorporated into all teaching as it is essential to social competency (Norris, 2018). Skill: Turn-taking In the Anselma home, we focused on turn-taking daily. In prioritizing helping Nick develop communication, we sat and played every day. The play was part of so many aspects of our home life as turning-taking is part of all play. The underlying foundational turn-taking skills are cognitive flexibility (transitioning -shifting mindsets), thinking of others (perspective), and impulse control. Start by playing what they love to play or doing what they love to do. Strategy: Turn-taking takes much practice for all kids. There is no clarity as to when it will be their turn. I prefer to take a favor, and/or my turn then your turn. Often the word sharing is used; however, for kids with weaknesses in social communication, sharing can be a more abstract concept. It's a bit more precise. A foundational component of communication and socializing is taking a turn. It is not a conversation or playing if there is no turn-taking/back and forth. Build: Consistently and repeatedly model turn-taking and thinking of others. There is a why to turn-taking: we need to think of others. It is perspective-taking thinking of others' thoughts and emotions. The family unit is the first social group your child will encounter. When my kids were young and during our teen years which we are still in, I would say "your turn" to pick the restaurant, activity, or game. When my kids were toddlers and early elementary, I would join in whatever they were doing, and then I would ask them can I have a turn now. With homework, I would help them by doing a problem or sampling/modeling the task so they could see it being done. I would say can I help you get started, then I would say now it is your turn; you continue. I would also get things started and let them finish. Our family often traveled, so we would say your turn to pick a place to eat or visit since you accompanied us on our adventure. We would take turns on whose activity would go first in the day. For siblings, one child mustn't control the family. That you take turns with their requests. When they are young, it needs to be more literal and physical, as if you would pass a ball back and forth. As they become preteens and teens, you need to discuss more the thinking of others. I constantly shared my perspective with my kids and what the other person's perspective may be. It was a three-part exchange: What am I thinking and feeling about this situation? What are you thinking and feeling about this situation? What do you think they are thinking and feeling about it? It is developmentally appropriate to be self-centered during the teen years, so requiring your kids to take a turn is even more critical. You cannot allow your home to become child-centered. You must help them acknowledge all family members and that they have preferences as well. Social media does not help with monologues since they can have a one-way conversation all day. I frequently see parents letting young children and teens monopolize the conversation. They never redirect or say, " Let's hear what your friend has to say. Social turn-taking and sharing space: When my kids were having difficulty sharing space or engaging with us. I would join them and sit there for a while with them so that they grow accustomed to me in their area. sharing space in close proximity is vital to establish joint attention (paying attention to the same thing) Ask to look at what they are looking at or doing use the language "my turn" and "your turn." give them a turn when doing anything together, even if they don't ask for it Some children or teens have difficulty turn-taking when in situations where the environment is unfamiliar, or many people. In these situations, the child/teen feels that they have less control which may make them feel extremely uncomfortable. In these situations, they will seek to take control, and the response may not always be socially expectable. Their reaction may be to engage their peer group, disrupting play or conversation abruptly. They intend to join in, but the sudden abruptness disregards peers' space and exchange. The best way to help your child/teen ease into these situations is to teach them to observe. Before participating one can be an observer. When entering a social situation, practice with them entering, greeting, waiting, looking, and observing before jumping in. the greeting is important sets the tone, and asking questions, "what are you all up to" practice observing, listening, and imitating before joining situations so that you can model for them provide information on expectations and what are some exit options if they do not feel comfortable or need a break When your child mentions that they are having difficulties with peers, gather information on how they approach and engage peers. Commonly, they may not be waiting their turn and this causes conflicts with peers. Practice conversational turn-taking with your child as often as you can. Model asking about their day, needs and challenges. Share about your day, needs and challenges. Spend time listening and be a part of their moment or interests especially with teens. Listening and observing in the teen years is important because there is so much going on in their environment. They may need help navigating this new season in their life, and they may not know how to ask for the assistance they need. I find they need much coaching on what to say and when to say it. Self-advocacy is very important in the teen years, learning to speak up for yourself and your needs. Works Cited: K. Norris, BS, MEd, Autism Basics, July 24, 2018. The excerpt was taken from this course answering the question What is social-emotional reciprocity. Resource: This entire excerpt was taken from Norris's Autism Basic's course Let's examine some foundational skills that underlie these methods of information sharing.: Joint attention. One of the basic skills involved in social-emotional reciprocity is joint attention. This typically develops in the first year or two of life. Joint attention is actively paying attention to the same object or activity at the same time with another person. We see babies do this all the time. As you're holding a baby, for example, and he hears an airplane in the sky and sees you look up, he'll also look up to see what it is. He may point at the airplane and look back at you, wanting you to look back at that. This tends to be a skill that children with autism are missing. The lack of joint attention may be one of the early signs of autism. Imitation. Imitation is another basic skill for social-emotional reciprocity. Parents, teachers, and peers are all people that young children will imitate. Imitation is one of the ways that children learn. If children with autism have that break in that social-emotional reciprocity, if they have that break in that ability to imitate others, then their social communication is negatively impacted. Reciprocal engagement. Once we have joint attention in place and we have imitation in place, then we usually enter into that reciprocal engagement. Again, it's the back and forth that we need to maintain long enough to learn something, enjoy something, and share something with another person. It's paying attention to people versus paying attention to objects. Children with autism have a tendency to focus strongly on objects. Objects are much more predictable than people and much easier for them to understand because of the deficits in their social communication. Non-verbal communication. Another area that can be affected in social communication is non-verbal communication. This would include facial expressions, as well as tone of voice. Using a single finger to point to an object is a non-verbal gesture that's important for young children to develop. You'll see very young children indicating what they want by pointing to it. They'll look at the object and then they'll look back at their caregiver to say, "Hey, pay attention to this. This is what I want. I'm pointing right at it." This often happens even before they can tell you the name of the object. Eye contact is a significant part of non-verbal communication and is often something that children with autism will try to avoid. Maintaining eye contact with someone is very uncomfortable for them, mainly because

  Teen Anxiety in High School Podcast Episode Summary: Over the last couple of years, there has been an increase in teenage anxiety and depression. Personally, we have seen the impact of this increase at the Center.  After seeing so many children and teens struggling with anxiety it is critical to prioritize:  Listening to a child or teen Understand all their needs Ensure that they have the words to communicate thoughts and emotions Anxiety: is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.  We all have anxiety at different times in our lives for different reasons. Anxiety is a normal response. When anxiety impacts one’s ability to perform daily life tasks and activities this is outside the healthy range. Nick shares on the different skill podcast his experience with anxiety during his transition to high school.    Story:  When did you notice anxiety was impacting your quality of life? In my Freshman year of high school, I started at a new school. I had spent the last 8 years in a small elementary and middle school Bethany Christian School. My graduating middle school class was 20 kids. I was entering a freshman class of 200 students.  I was very concerned with fitting in and making new friends. Two of my friends came with me to Calvary which provided some ease and needed support. I really wanted to succeed socially but my anxiety would stop me from meeting people.  The anxiety was impacting my quality of life. I was constantly overthinking just saying hi to peers. I would be nervous and uneasy. I would wonder how I looked to other people. I would stay in this loop overthinking the interaction till I froze. What did you do first?  I got tired of freezing up and not taking action. I wanted to meet people and have a successful social life. I decided to start to take small steps by: ·      Identify different ways that I could meet people joined track team: teams and clubs make the school smaller ·      Approach peers that were in my classes ·      Challenge myself to go up to someone new at lunch and sit with them How would you avoid the overthinking loop that led to freeze mode?  Focus on acting vs. thinking small steps Positive self-talk What else did you do? Share my struggle with my family.  Sharing makes you feel better and you discover you are not the only one that is struggling. Sought advice from my older sister. She struggled with anxiety all throughout elementary school and high school freshman year was a big transition for her as well. Gaby inspired me she was courageous and would go to school social events on her own.  Gaby was solution-focused she would make a plan and then act. Her approach was small steps as well. One of my classes was strength and conditioning. This class ignited my interest in weightlifting. In middle school, I boxed and did calisthenics. Boxing was an outlet for my stress and anxiety. With this new level of stress and anxiety, I needed something more intense. The weightlifting really helped me cope and release the stress. It also built my confidence and improve my physical appearance.    The gym at my school was also a very social place, I was able to make new friends with shared interests.        

Is it Non-Compliance or inability to Self-Regulate?    In the last two months, I may have had more than two or three dozen conversations where parents share that they are getting notes home from the teacher that their child is non-compliant. In most cases, the child or teen is avoiding the task they are being asked to complete. It has always been my belief that no child wants to fail. There is always a reason for the behavior so finding the reason is important. With an autistic child, the question should always be what is the skill needed to complete the task and do they have this skill. The mindset should be a skill gap leads to task avoidance. Task initiation, avoidance, completion, and endurance all fall under the skill set of self-regulation. Autism impacts self-regulation and the gravity varies depending on the child’s autism profile. This impact results in skill gaps in the executive function which is the mental processes that are involved in managing oneself. In autism self-regulation and self-management will require support to organize their mind and bodies to complete tasks. The question to ask when there is task avoidance: what tool, strategy, resource or support does the child need to be more constructive? Not how do we manage the behavior? Self -regulation is a process internal to one’s self that involves “controlling one’s behavior, emotions and the thoughts in pursuit of long term goals. Self-regulation is the core aspect of adaptive behavior-meaning adjusting to the situation. Executive Function is a set of mental processes that have to do with managing oneself and one's resources in order to achieve a goal and involves mental control and self-regulation In the last few years, we have really placed an enormous emphasis on behaviors in autism. To the detriment of identifying the skill deficit that results in this behavior. The most common behaviors that are identified by a teacher for an autistic child are: BIG SKILL: underlying all these other skills is language acquisition (what words mean and how to put them together), for example asking for help, or a break when needed BEHAVIOR: does not transition from one task/activity to another SKILL: focus/attention, impulse control, cognitive flexibility BEHAVIOR: does not follow directions SKILL: attention, focus, listening, language processing and comprehension, working memory, impulse control BEHAVIOR: unable to get started independently or does not want to do work SKILL: initiate task -getting started independently requires sustained attention, impulse control (block distracting thoughts), and cognitive flexibility BEHAVIOR: not staying on task, scattered attention, getting up or distracted from the task with other thoughts SKILL: staying on task requires sustained attention, impulse control, and cognitive flexibility (shift attention back) BEHAVIOR: not completing work or tasks SKILL: task completion/finishing requires staying on task, sustained attention, impulse control, and cognitive flexibility (shift attention back) skills Story: Both of my kids have an incredibly unique and diverse learning style. When it comes to their ability to self-manage/self-regulate they are polar opposites. We all have unique ways to get goals accomplished. Self-regulation is goal-driven behavior. There are many skills involved in accomplishing goals. My son was under-responsive to his environment. What that means is he had difficulty getting his mind and body organized to tackle the day. Each child on the autism spectrum uniquely navigates their daily differently depending on their needs. They all need support with self-regulation/self-management because autism impacts self-regulation. So the inability to initiate or get started is not always behavior. The level of difficulty in self-regulating is impacted in autism by the level of deficit in: social communication, the inflexibility of behavior, difficulty coping with change, or other restricted/repetitive behaviors . In my son’s case, his social communication was greatly impacted at a young age, however, there was not a high level of inflexibility, coping with change, and/or restricted or repetitive behaviors. There may be several explanations for this but due to him being non-verbal we provided tools and supports that possibly allowed more flexibility in dealing with change very early in the diagnosis. We implemented the visual schedule and communication system PECS at 2 years old. This made his daily life predictable and consistent. Since Nick was really not one to engage his environment we set up a routine that would promote engagement. He was a good baby and toddler he stayed where you left him. So much of our intervention was increased exposure and experience exploring the world. I viewed them as guided interactions and I was the tour guide. We engaged him frequently and consistently we did not allow him to be zoned out in his own world for too long. There are children that are over-responsive to their environment and we can characterize them as extremely active and engaging their environment not always appropriately. With this profile, the focus would be on activities and strategies to increase focus, calming, coping, and exercise. The over-responsive child can struggle in an academic environment where you are expected to stay seated for long periods of time. Sensory integration difficulties can make a child over-responsive since they are seeking to feed their sensory needs. Meeting these needs with a daily sensory diet is important to help bring balance to the child's mind and body. Ignoring sensory needs will lead to behaviors that can be managed. In both scenarios over-responsive or under-responsive, what is important to know and understand is that the regulation/organization will need to come from the outside in for our autistic children. The level of support will vary depending on their level of dysregulation. Why is this so important? Dysregulation is the first thing that is seen, typically called behaviors. Why do I not call it behaviors because everything in autism is not a behavior although it may appear that way to so many? What presents as behaviors is an autistic person attempting to navigate their surroundings with no tools. My son’s toolbox was extensive. Since he was not able to communicate substantially till age 4 we started with PECS at age 2 and continued with a communication device. We also invested much time in teaching him to meet his own needs. His intervention plan prioritized language development, communication, and independent function over all other interventions. The communication tools made his world more organized, and predictable as well as outline social expectations. They also repeated the language for him that applied to that situation. It gave him the order he needed to proceed and explore the world more safely. Skill: Self-Regulation Self -regulation is a process internal to one’s self that involves “controlling one’s behavior, emotions and the thoughts in pursuit of long term goals. Promoting self-managing in autism requires focusing on building independent functioning skills. This requires intervention planning that prioritizes these skills over academic instruction. It is critical in autism that the child can navigate their classroom or any environment as independently as possible. Initiating a task and completing a task independently is more important than advanced academics. Having an advanced reading level is great however, if the child cannot read independently. With autism know how to do a task is just as important as doing task independently. Strategy: Providing a support system to help the child organize, manage sensory needs and engage. This is a toolbox that will evolve with your child’s development. Having an autistic mind means that you learn differently so you must have the tools to support this learning style. The expectation cannot be that the child will develop a skill independently without instruction or support. The expectation that a child with autism will self-manage independently continuously and consistently without organizational tools and strategies is the same as you expecting to navigate your day without your smartphone, laptop, or planner. Thinking tools! schedule: provide a structured learning environment that is predictable with advance notice visual schedule, checklists, and reminders in lieu of verbal prompting additional time makes the world of difference for a child that is trying to organize their mind and body continuously providing additional time for transitions providing additional time for initiation of task written instructions or steps for tasks that are difficult such as writing or reading comprehension that require the child to generate and organize language story maps - outlines the story writing prompts to get started on an essay reading and writing tasks are split into sections/steps work folder - organize tasks breaks - a child with autism uses their brain for social, emotional, and academic so frequently there is mental exhaustion incorporating movement, sensory or quiet space breaks can restore focus and endurance Build To build self-management skills it’s critical to use the same systems, strategies, and tools consistently. Secondly, use the same systems, strategies, and tools across environments. The goal is to build independence and help your child to manage their own needs. The biggest challenge in setting up these systems is that you need to self-organize to sustain a home environment that can follow the system that you set up. Consistency is the hardest for families for obvious reasons. Better to teach one skill consistently than teach 10 skills inconsistently. The autism learning style requires varied repetition. Not just repeating the task in the same way but var

Please Welcome! Cynthia Tobar shares with us the structure and routines that she has implemented in their daily lives to help Jackson, her son, build self-regulation/management skills.  Self -regulation is a process internal to one’s self that involves “controlling one’s behavior, emotions and the thoughts in pursuit of long term goals. Self-regulation is the core aspect of adaptive behavior-meaning adjusting to the situation. Executive Function is a set of mental processes that have to do with managing oneself and one's resources in order to achieve a goal and involves mental control and self-regulation Self-regulation is the result of executive function skills working together. Working memory, cognitive flexibility, and inhibitory control work together to help us self-manage. A significant fact is that we are not born with these skills; we acquire them incrementally over time. Some experiences and conditions can impact the development of these skills. For example, those on the autism spectrum, ADHD, learning disabilities, and early childhood neglect or trauma have difficulty acquiring these skills. The individual may experience different challenges with either flexibility, working memory, or impulse control. No matter the condition or learning differences, the child can learn these skills. Some children may require different instructional strategies and additional tools; however, systems can be in place to equip them with these skills. As essential as they are, we aren’t born with the skills that enable us to control impulses, make plans, and stay focused. We are born with the potential to develop these capacities—or not—depending on our experiences during infancy, throughout childhood, and into adolescence. Our genes provide the blueprint, but the early environments in which children live leave a lasting signature on those genes. ! Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University (2011). Building the Brain’s “Air Traffic Control” System: How Early Experiences Shape the Development of Executive Function: Working Paper No. 11. Retrieved from www.developingchild.harvard.edu. Some children require that systems be implemented to promote self-regulate/manage more effectively. Join us as we will explore strategies to build self-regulation for independent living. 

Self -regulation is a process internal to one’s self that involves “controlling one’s behavior, emotions and the thoughts in pursuit of long term goals What are the skills behind successful learning in and out of a school environment? Self -regulation is a process internal to one’s self that involves “controlling one’s behavior, emotions and the thoughts in pursuit of long term goals. Self-regulation is the core aspect of adaptive behavior-meaning adjusting to the situation. Executive Function is a set of mental processes that have to do with managing oneself and one's resources in order to achieve a goal and involves mental control and self-regulation Self-regulation is the result of executive function skills working together. Working memory, cognitive flexibility, and inhibitory control work together to help us self-manage. A significant fact to know is that we are not born with these skills; we acquire them incrementally over time. Some experiences and conditions can impact the development of these skills. For example, those on the autism spectrum, ADHD, learning disabilities, and early childhood neglect or trauma have difficulty acquiring these skills. The individual may experience different challenges with either flexibility, working memory, or impulse control. No matter the condition or learning differences, the child can learn these skills. Some children may require different instructional strategies and additional tools; however, systems can be in place to equip them with these skills. As essential as they are, we aren’t born with the skills that enable us to control impulses, make plans, and stay focused. We are born with the potential to develop these capacities—or not—depending on our experiences during infancy, throughout childhood, and into adolescence. Our genes provide the blueprint, but the early environments in which children live leave a lasting signature on those genes. ! Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University (2011). Building the Brain’s “Air Traffic Control” System: How Early Experiences Shape the Development of Executive Function: Working Paper No. 11. Retrieved from www.developingchild.harvard.edu. In this post, we will focus on identifying and defining these skills. Several future posts will cover instructional strategies and tools to teach self-regulation skills. You can find the rest of the post on our different skill notebook blog at https://www.socialmindcenter.com/differentskillnotebook-1/2022/1/3/self-regulation  

FREEZE: ANXIETY IN THE CLASSROOM We have all played the freeze game. When the music stops playing you remain still (Freeze) in place. The person who moves is out of the game. It has been approximately 9 weeks since school started and in this time we have had a common thread in many calls from our families’ teachers claiming non-compliance during certain sessions during the school day. The teacher claims that they have tried everything and the child is still refusing to work. One of the amazingly enlightening experiences for me is having the opportunity to meet so many children with varying learning differences and work with their families. We have the opportunity to spend extended periods of time with them and observer them in stressful situations. We frequently witness the freeze we interpret as means of coping with information overload and/or anxiety regarding demands placed outside of their skill set. Children with anxiety and sensory integration challenges can freeze when presented with a task that is unfamiliar or difficult for them. The most common call we have had in the last two months is our parents sharing that their child’s teacher contacted them to notify them that their child is non-compliant and refusing to work. Additionally, the teacher will state that they have tried everything and they still refuse to work. On our end, we do not refer to this response to certain tasks as non-compliance. We prefer the term task avoidance. A child or teen that has an Individual Education Plan (IEP) has learning differences that impact their performance at school. With this advance notice, there cannot be an expectation that this child will perform at the same pace or ease as peers without IEP’s. The intent of an IEP is that the child will be provided with the tools, resources, and instruction to bridge the skills gaps resulting from the learning difference. The teacher should be aware that this child’s performance will vary initially till some of these skill gaps can be bridged. So at the beginning of the school year after a pandemic with many children being out of school for a significant amount of time children with IEP’s should have additional time allotted for adaptatie. When there is an IEP in place the progress of this child should be based on skill acquisition based on their individualized goals as outlined in their individual education plan. Their performance should never be compared to a neurotypical peer. So in this article, I want to discuss the situation of anxiety in the classroom and how that can often look like a child is frozen. When the child remains still it appears as if they are refusing to work. When a child is not performing the question to ask oneself is where is the skill gap or what is the skill needed. Then the next step is what strategy that can help the child overcome the anxiety they are experiencing in relation to these tasks. We very often when seeing this freeze reaction there is a demand placed that is outside the child’s ability. Skill: Defrost Strategy: Reduce pace and task So when working with a child with anxiety it is so important to know that when the anxiety is high and they are not performing this is not a time to press forward and insist. The response should be to pause and allow some time for them to adjust to the situation. Give them a few minutes and perhaps allow an opportunity to go to the bathroom splash some water on the face or break for a few minutes. Pause - allow a few minutes. After a pause and consider minimizing the task. However, prior to minimizing the task repeat directions and do one problem with the child (sample). If it is a writing assignment get them started with a writing prompt. For example, write out the first sentence. When children have self-regulation challenges they have a difficult time organizing their mind and body to start a task. Giving them additional time and a sampling of the work can help them get started. Also, assuring them that if they are not certain what they need to do they can ask for help. This is a model for self-advocacy. Depending on the child’s IEP they may require additional instruction or a visual checklist (to-do list) to self-initiate and work toward building task endurance. Some children struggle with attention and language processing therefore they require more direction. I prefer a checklist so the teacher does not have to repeat themselves and it promotes independence. Build: coping skills to defrost Allowing time to defrost and settle into new routines and expectations. Some children take longer to adjust to new routines. When implementing any strategy note it should be consistently used for several weeks to know if is effective. In our experience anxiety is experienced when there is an independent working task involving writing or a long worksheet. It truly depends on the child’s learning difference. In our experience children with focus/attention struggle to stay on task for long periods and require task endurance to be built up in increments. Children with language deficits including those with autism take a longer time to process language and directions. For tasks suck as writing requiring generating and organizing language, you may witness task avoidance. Tools: create task endurance and focus checklists highlight instructions and areas to be completed choose either odd and even numbers of problems to reduce the length of the worksheet first and then visual (could be post-it note separating task in two) folder with one pocket labeling one side to do and finished When students struggle with self-regulation it impacts their ability to organize and initiate tasks visuals such as checklists, folders and breaking down tasks into steps increases task endurance.