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“The white gaze is upon us at all times, and the ways in which Black bodies have been destroyed by whiteness are many. But this is just one of them.” - Sirius Bonner   One thing to get straight: divorcing yourself from diet culture isn’t just about being fat, loud, and proud. Sirius Bonner, who joins Hilary Kinavey and Dana Sturtevant for Part 2 of this two-part Inclusive Life podcast, drives home the importance of rooting our own relationship with our bodies in the broader political context. The context? Fat bodies are subjected to systemic oppression.   Sirius deepens the conversation Nicole, Hilary and Dana began in Part 1 around diet culture and racism. She shares “...There is a deeply connected root of anti-fatness and anti-Blackness from the time of slavery in the United States.” The conversation weaves from there into the complex ways anti-fatness shows up in the Black community—similar to the way colorism exists—as a means to keep themselves and their loved ones safe.   Internalized oppression in the shape of internalized anti-fatness is tragically logical: Sonya Renee Taylor, in her book The Body is Not an Apology, writes:    “We must not minimize or negate the impact of being told to hate or fear our bodies and the bodies of others. Living in a society structured to profit from our self-hate creates a dynamic in which we are so terrified of being ourselves that we adopt terror-based ways of being in our bodies.”   These terror-based ways of being in our bodies cause so much daily suffering, resulting from, as Nicole says, “...living in a system that consistently tells you that from the moment of birth, you’re never going to be enough.”   What’s difficult to see are the ways that white body supremacy couples' health and size.  High blood pressure?  A person with a thin body is provided medication and other medical advice. A person with a large body is told to lose weight and then come back for additional medical care. Both fat and thin people develop high blood pressure, so identifying fatness as causative doesn’t make sense. Yet doctors still center weight as the cause of disease and weight loss as the cure. Just like the war on drugs, the war on obesity is a war on people, both rooted in anti-Blackness.   Where can we begin to decouple fat and health? Fat and laziness? Fat and “you should try harder?” Fat and “it’s your fault?”   First, we can each begin by developing and deepening an appreciation for the diversity of bodies. Body diversity has always existed and will always exist. We can lay down our arms.   Second, we can shift our focus away from size and onto the social determinants of health, to understand the impact of fatphobia on fat folks’ health outcomes.    Third, we can continually center the voices and lived experiences of Black queer women in this conversation.    In this episode, Nicole, Sirius, Hilary, and Dana talk about: What’s beyond Body Positivity The marginalization of fat, Black, queer women in the Health at Every Size and Body Positivity movements De-centering the pursuit of health Taking an intersectional approach to size bias Rejecting dieting without an analysis The root of anti-fatness is anti-Blackness How diet culture shows up in a Black culture Fatness and proximity to whiteness Decoupling size and health Shifting the conversation to the social determinants of health Learning to become one’s own advocate   Bios:   Sirius Bonner is a passionate and noted presenter and facilitator. Sirius’ work focuses on the intersections between social justice issues such as racial oppression, reproductive justice, queer rights, anti-fat bias, educational equity, poverty, sexism, and liberation, recognizing that as we begin to untangle one issue, we can untangle them all. Sirius’ currently works at Planned Parenthood Columbia Willamette as the Vice President of Equity and Inclusion.   You can find Sir

“We all eat for emotional reasons. That’s normal. Food is flavored with complex meanings. It connects us with our culture and our ancestry and heritage. We eat to celebrate. We eat to grieve. Food is an emotional thing for human beings. When we dumb it down to its nutritional components and see it only as a vehicle to give us nutrients, we are missing so much.”  - Dana Sturtevant   If you haven’t yet considered weight stigma as a social justice issue, today is the day you begin. Diet culture is an insidious arm of white supremacy culture that has removed us from our bodies, from pleasure, and from our connection to our heritage. It has caused untold suffering to folks in fat bodies, impacting access to health care services, opportunities, and access to simply feeling good moving about in the world without shame and blame.   This conversation between Nicole and Dana Sturtevant and Hilary Kinavey, part one of a two-part episode, is one that lifts the lid on grief and loss. We have been fed so many lies.    Diet culture shapeshifts when we start to catch onto its oppression. We may have given up on counting calories and tracking points, but we strive to “eat clean” and “make healthy lifestyle changes” or go paleo or do intermittent fasting…whatever the latest trend to make our own bodies more acceptable or to weaponize against folks in larger bodies.    We learn early on that our bodies are problems to be solved, and that restricting food or eating just the right combination of nutrients will solve the problem. We are taught that there are right and wrong ways to live in a body.   Hilary shares, “People who occupy [fat bodies] are not able to function in the culture or pursue their joys, their lives, their bliss in the culture because fatness is considered something they have to resolve before they can get access to what they need.”   As Dana and Hilary share, the healthcare industry has centered “health care” around the Body Mass Index, the creation of a white statistician and founder of phrenology, a racist pseudoscience. The BMI was created not as a measurement of individual health, but as a tool to track populations for the insurance industry. The Body Mass Index has now been used for years in doctors' offices, in the field of dietetics, by the diet industry, and by professional trainers as a tool to measure health by means of body size. It’s bogus. It’s racist.    One alternative to the conventional paradigm of food, body image, and weight-centered health care is Body Trust, a process by which we can all learn to live more peacefully and compassionately in our bodies.   As with all our social justice work, in the work of fat liberation, we must center the voices, work, and lived experiences of the most marginalized, namely fat Black queer femmes.    We encourage you to disrupt diet culture and weight stigma in your own life by listening to the folks most harmed and developing an analysis so you can see the ways in which diet culture is expressing itself in your relationship with your body and other bodies.    It is time to divest. As a community, let’s hold one another in generous accountability for doing this work.   In this episode, Nicole, Hilary, and Dana talk about: • The origin story of Be Nourished • “Healthy lifestyle” behavior is dieting behavior • The empty promises of weight loss • What happens when we compliment someone’s body after weight loss • The racist roots of the BMI (see sources below for further reading) • Our indoctrination into diet culture • Diet culture’s focus on pathologizing foods of Black and Brown people • White dominance in dietetics • Weight stigma as a social justice issue • Reclaiming “fat” as a neutral descriptor • Beginning the journey of body trust   About Dana and Hilary:   Dana Sturtevant is the co-founder of Be Nourished, LLC and co-creator of Body Trust®. She

"Creativity and engaging in creativity can offer insight into how we move forward." - Jennifer Davis   There’s a sturdy and subversive thread woven through Jennifer Davis’s life and work: Where there’s an expectation to do things a certain way, of conformity or straight lines, because that’s how it’s always been done, Jennifer’s life is all about saying, “Nope. I’m doing it differently.”    It feels like the “yes” and the path for Jennifer is in the joy, in the curvy unpatterned strokes of her paintbrush, in the “let’s try this and see what happens.”    In her work and life, Jennifer is exploring where creativity and liberation intersect, asking how creativity as a practice can inform the work of liberation.    She shares, “Creativity, in so many ways, is almost the exact opposite of oppression and oppressive systems, which demand perfection and accuracy and get-it-right-everytime.”  In her work alone and with other folks, she explores how creativity can provide a way forward, with its space for play, questions, and mistakes that turn out to be openings for something new to emerge.   And although social justice is a serious endeavor, the “work of liberation” has to be infused with play and joy.  Nicole identifies this in Jennifer’s art, this pairing of the whimsical and innocent with powerful political statements.    The conversation lands on a “press pause” moment when they identify that their ability as Black women to find joy, innovation, and art is inherent in the struggle-- a truth that’s easy to miss if you’re not living it. Jennifer makes it harder to miss. In this conversation, in Jennifer’s work, in her love of texture and color, in her completely joyful lip synch/dance thing on Instagram, there’s an irresistible invitation into joy and play.    Joy and revolution now. Joy is the revolution now.   Please listen in, and after you do, let us know how the conversation surfaces for you. We’d love to hear from you.   We also invite you to check out Jennifer’s Play and Healing at the Intersections: Conversations on Creativity and Liberation, monthly gatherings where folks convene to talk and “make marks” together.   In this episode, Nicole and Jennifer touch on: • Jennifer’s intention in pairing the whimsical and the political in her art • How getting stuck in outgrown ideologies can steal the joy • Art and healing • The importance of “marrying joy and challenges” • Jennifer’s insistence on centering her existence on joy and community, not oppression • Exploring the intersection of creativity and liberation • Their refusal to engage in “trauma wasting”  • “Get in bitches. We’re being inclusive.”   Bio: Jennifer Price Davis is a Cleveland-based painter, illustrator, and writer.  As a primarily self-taught artist, as a practice, Jennifer paints what pops into her soul and demands to come to life.  Jennifer has a BA in psychology and an MA in art therapy counseling. Until very recently, she was a teacher of 1st through 3rd graders. Prior to her work as a teacher, she was a career counselor.    Jennifer’s work focuses primarily on black culture and what it means to exist in black bodies, with emphasis on black women and girls. She is particularly interested in illuminating the ordinary. In the ordinary, Jennnifer sees something both achingly beautiful, immensely political, and even revolutionary, about the ability to exist and move about the world safely and confidently in ordinary ways.     Her goal is to participate in the progress of liberation through every bit of her work.   You can find Jennifer at jenniferpricedavis.com On Instagram: @jenpdavis  You can purchase her products at Redbubble: JenPriceDavis  Learn more about Play and Healing at the Intersections: Conversations on Creativity and Liberation You can support her work at Patreon

“If you’re designing a space for the most marginalized folks, by definition, the entire experience is going to be more inclusive for everybody.”   It is a gift to have Pamela Slim as our guest for the official start of Inclusive Life Podcast Season 2.    The conversation illuminates Pam’s skills at disrupting business as usual. She points out over and over again the choices business owner’s can make to cultivate one’s business as an ecosystem versus approaching business building as an empire, amassing market power through competition, extraction, and hierarchy.   The conversation opens with the metaphorical opening of Pam’s new book, The Widest Net, which she’s dedicated to her dearest friend, Desiree Adaway. Pam holds up Desiree as a model for inclusive business leadership. Clarity, honesty, and revolutionary love are what she brings both to their friendship and to those she manages. What Pam and Nicole are highlighting in this opening tribute to Desiree is the tap root of a thriving ecosystem: companionship and community built around shared values. As listeners, you will feel the strong weaving of the net.    A competitive, scarcity-based, transactional approach to business success is isolating and rigid. There is little room for mistakes or authenticity. And if there is no room for authenticity, then there truly is no room for inclusion.   Many of us are in the process of building business, with all the insecurity and fear that accompany this journey. Often, equity and inclusion are values we want to work in AFTER our businesses have reached a certain level of stability. Once we get “there,” we’ll really focus on equity. What Pam has seen in her long career in coaching business owners is that it doesn’t get easier to prioritize equity and inclusion later. In fact, without centering equity and inclusion at the outset (or starting now), business owners inadvertently build their businesses with practices that center whiteness and hierarchy.    Nicole and Pam weed out the central themes of The Widest Net and Pam’s evolving approach to business and coaching. They identify that practicing clarity, consistency, and ecosystems in an iterative, synergistic, and curiosity-fueled cycle is a way to weave a wide supportive, inclusive net.   Mind you, Pam is not talking about casting a net, which is much more of an empire building approach. She’s talking about weaving a net that draws folks (including you!) into a supportive, connected community where everyone’s unique gifts and lived experiences are valued and each can thrive.    This is not easy work. And that’s exactly why we need a wide net.   Listen in. We can’t wait to hear your takeaways.   The conversation also includes: Equity and inclusion: not “nice to haves” but qualities and practices that fuel businesses The validation that all of us business owners and managers are agents of change doing transformational work  The importance of being open  Why there is never a better time than now to build an inclusive and equitable business Choosing curiosity as a posture when leaning into inclusion and equity, especially as a new business owner Disrupting empire building while building our businesses A discussion of transformation and transaction that transcends the binary The three themes of The Widest Net   Bio:   Pamela Slim is an award-winner author, speaker and business coach who works with small business owners ready to scale their businesses and IP.    She is the author of Escape from Cubicle Nation (Penguin Portfolio, 2009), Body of Work (Penguin Portfolio, 2014) and The Widest Net (McGraw Hill, November, 2021).   Pam and her husband Darryl Slim co-founded the K’é Main Street Learning Lab in Mesa, Arizona, where they host scores of diverse community leaders and regular small business programming.   You can find Pam at: PamelaSlim.com Twitter: @pamslim Facebook: @pamela.slim Linked

For many people alarmed at the very visible anti-Black racism at the outset of the Russian invasion of Ukraine two weeks ago, it’s important to understand more about the history of Afro Ukrainians and Africans in Ukraine. This conversation between Dr. Clarence Lusane and Nicole Lee sheds some light. We’ll learn that it is not a new history.   Dr. Lusane, who has traveled and taught in Ukraine and all over the world, shared that after Ghana became independent from British colonial rule in 1957, and in 1960 when 17 other African countries gained their independence from colonial rule, thousands of students arrived in both Russia and Ukraine to study from countries all over Africa, including South Africa, Morocco and Tanzania. Thousands.   African students over the years have been drawn to Ukraine for studies including in STEM and medicine because it was relatively welcoming, inexpensive and easy to study there.   In 2014, after Russia invaded Crimea, pro-Russian, fascist, nationalistic militias rose up in eastern Ukraine, taking over the Donetsk and Luhansk republics. It was here in the east that African students were kidnapped and violently abused by these pro-right insurgents.    Now, in addition to these Africans having arrived to study 60-65 years ago, there are second and third generation Afro-Ukrainians in Ukraine, as well as other diasporic Africans.   When Putin refers to neo-Nazism in Ukraine he is, not surprisingly, twisting facts and history. As is true most everywhere in the world, there are neo-Nazis in Ukraine, even serving in the Ukrainian government. Despite that, neo-Nazism does not drive Ukrainian public policy.   This conversation gets to the important nuance missed in reporting and social media.    There is an important challenge toward the end responding to the question “What is the way forward for progressives?”    We hope you’ll listen in.   About Dr. Clarence Lusane:   Dr. Clarence Lusane is a full Professor and former Chairman of Howard University’s Department of Political Science.  He is an author, activist, scholar, lecturer, and journalist.    He has been in the fight for national and international human rights and justice for well over 40 years. He is a pioneer in anti-racism politics. He has written about and been active in U.S. foreign policy, democracy building, and social justice issues such as education, criminal justice, and drug policy.  His research focuses on the intersection of race and politics in the US and globally ranging from human rights and social equity to social movements and public policy.   As a scholar, researcher, policy-advocate, and activist, he has traveled to over 70 nations. He has lectured on U.S. race relations and human rights in Brazil, Colombia, China, Cuba, Germany, Guyana, Guadeloupe, Ireland, Japan, the Netherlands, New Zealand, North Korea, Pakistan, Panama, Rwanda, South Africa, South Korea, Switzerland, Turkey, and Ukraine among others.  He has taught and been on the faculty at Medgar Evers College, Columbia University and American University, and been a visiting professor and lecturer in the UK, Ukraine, France, Russia, South Korea, New Zealand and Japan.   In addition to his forthcoming book,Twenty Dollars and Change: Harriet Tubman vs. Andrew Jackson, and the Future of American Democracy, he is also the author of The Black History of the White House, Colin Powell and Condoleezza Rice: Foreign Policy, Race, and the New American Century; Hitler’s Black Victims: The Experiences of Afro-Germans, Africans, Afro-Europeans and African Americans During the Nazi Era; Race in the Global Era: African Americans at the Millennium; and Pipe Dream Blues:  Racism and the War on Drugs among others.

“There’s a way that we can meet urgent moments without the spirit of urgency. That requires a competency and capacity that comes from deep grounding and regulation. Being able to show up consistently in ritual, rhythm and routine.” This conversation with Jen Lemen feels like strong medicine. With so many of us understandably depleted and exhausted, this topic of rest and sensitively responding to the needs of our bodies is so important and resonant.  Jen has learned, through her own relationships forged in times of urgency and danger, to “interrupt” urgency. The interruption can be as simple as an intentional step outside, or a deliberate hand on the heart while taking a deep breath. But these interruptions can not be a “one and done” deal. What was fascinating is that Jen talks about stepping away and resting as a ”competency,” which suggests that rest is a learnable skill acquired through practice. If we practice day to day, in the form of simple supportive rhythms, rituals and routines, we cultivate stamina and resilience, thus equipping ourselves to arrive in urgent times with clarity and creativity. What Jen is talking about is taking some level of ownership over our nervous system regulation. She shares, “Regulation is the secret sauce.” This regulation can be sourced from one’s own competence, and also from co-regulation, or synching to the nervous systems of others. We do this naturally, whether the people we are with are well-regulated or not. Thus we can see our own self-tending as a way to care for our people as well.  The activity of our pre-frontal lobe is inhibited in times of fear and heightened stress. This is the part of our brains that is associated with impulse control, critical thinking, long term planning and even optimism -- all necessary components to imagining and creating new systems of care. With rhythms, rituals and routines, the body is coaxed out of a fight or flight mode. We instinctively lean on rhythms, rituals and routines for babies and small children, but we lose sight of these vital practices. Actually, white supremacy culture, with its emphasis on perfectionism, urgency and relentless productivity, socialize us to let go of these practices, making stopping and resting seem superfluous and self-indulgent. A Black leader of this counter-cultural rest movement is Tricia Hersey, the founder of the Nap Ministry, who promotes rest for individuals and napping as a public communal practice. The need for rest is of particular importance for Black Americans whose ability to rest and sleep deeply has been damaged over generations by white supremacy culture, with significant physical and psychological health fall out. Not only is rest more difficult because of the trauma of anti-Black racism, but Hersey says, “...Black people...have been socialized to believe you have to do more and work harder to equalize yourself....It’s a disservice to paint it that way because it’s not true. It’s a lie. It adds to the sleep deprivation that is mental and psychological that we don’t deserve rest.” The reminders and exhortation to rest, to pause, to create deliberate interruptions to busy-ness are so helpful to hear. It may take time to unlearn urgency and busy-ness. That’s why Jen’s reminder to begin with self-compassion feels like a good starting place. It doesn’t make sense to berate ourselves into taking a nap or getting some sunshine on our faces. We can’t wait for you to listen in and share your takeaways with us.   Nicole and Jen talked about: Being grounded and rested as a core competency of activism Practicing rest as an act of resistance How to meet urgent moments without the spirit of urgency The ways in which white supremacy culture show up in movement spaces The power of stillness and co-regulation to move our movements forward How not to use this practice to bypass people’s pain and harm “Above the Line/Below the line” Mutual aide: what

This conversation amongst friends is a peek into the deep complexities of keeping Black, Indigenous, People of Color, and other marginalized folks safe while they activate and organize for liberation. Black Movement Law Project is about the intentional and deliberate work of first protecting (physically and legally) the people in movement spaces. At the same time, the work of BMLP is supporting local communities to develop sustainable infrastructure so that the people within movement spaces are empowered and cared for. BMLP’s origins thread back to Ferguson and with nash, even further back into the Occupy Movement.  Their work has been fundamental across the country as people protest police brutality and the terrorizing of Black and other mariginalized people by police. What surfaces in this conversation is the strategy and forward-thinking necessary to liberate marginalized folks when working within systems that are designed to subjugate them. Every move must be carefully turned over, anticipating the fall-out way down the road. Historically, as Abi asserts, the very institutions that cause the crises usually come out twice as strong in the end. Thus, with loud calls for accountability for the crimes of the white supremacist insurrectionists, movement people must be mindful of the unintended consequences. During this conversation, for example, Tanay, Nicole, Abi, nash, and Marques carefully turn over how policies regulating hate speech can eventually be used to clamp down on marginalized people trying to organize around systems of oppression. It was fascinating to listen to this “think tank” do its thinking. and see their understanding of the current state of anti-oppression work evolve. Their strategizing and BMLP operations are rooted in their lived experiences as People of Color on the ground during uprisings and their desire to support movement spaces from a place of relationship. No one gets thrown away. As nash says, “Liberation is collective or it’s non-existent.”   In this episode, we talked about: The origin story of the Black Movement Law Project, with its intention to create a proactive space for Black leadership in jail and legal support for the Black Lives Matter activists The priority and focus of  BMLP: to help build up the capacities and infrastructure in local Black-led communities to make movement work sustainable The work now in movement work: to create opportunities for entry The glaring differences in policing white supremacists v. Black activists fighting for their lives and Constitutional rights Monitoring hate speech on social media platforms The level of organization amongst white supremacists during the insurrection and the likelihood of support from the inside How white supremacist mobs in DC highlight Washingtonian’s need for statehood, a community that is mostly Black and without representation in the federal government The very complex difficulties in demanding accountability for the traitors while not putting Black and other marginalized folks at greater risk long term. The systems of accountability are built to oppress marginalized people. The way discernment and intuition guides each of their decision making in dangerous, critical moments What it means to live an inclusive life   Bio:   Tanay Lynn Harris Tanay Lynn Harris is the Founder and Principal Strategist of Tenacity Consulting. As a facilitator, organizer, and abolitionist, she advises and supports organizations to achieve equitable and transformative change through learning journeys and critical social consciousness. She is committed to holistic approaches to cultivating change-makers and ushering in liberation and transformation through the building and cultivation of relationships and reimagining a world anew. Tanay worked for the Center for African American Research and Public Policy at Temple University as a co-coordinator and was an educator in Philadelphia. Her time as a grassroots organizer in

We’ve all heard the phrase “stay in your lane,” an admonition that can actually cause paralysis for people just stepping into social change work. When thinking about activism, I wanted to share a framework that holds the concept of “lanes” more loosely and graciously. Deepa Iyer, author of We Too Sing America: South Asian, Arab, Muslim and Sikh Immigrants Shape Our Multiracial Future and creator of the podcast Solidarity Is This, created a tool, “Mapping our Roles in Social Change Ecosystems” in 2017.  Deepa describes the framework as a tool that “can help individuals, networks, and organizations align and get in right relationship with social change values, individual roles, and the broader ecosystem.” It is a framework that can deepen our understanding of the many necessary roles that people play in social change. The Social Change Ecosystem Map can be a mirror we hold up to ourselves, prompting necessary introspection. Looking at the wheel of roles I might ask myself: Is my “occupation” of multiple roles actually harming the success of this organization? Is there someone else who might step into a role I’ve traditionally held onto? Is the role I play the best use of my interests and skills? Does it give me joy? A map is also a tool that helps us understand the nuance and dynamism of social change organizations. Importantly, it can help each of us respond more confidently to the question “Where do I fit in? What is my role?” Like most frameworks, the Social Change Ecosystem allows for fluidity and change. For example, we might find that in one organization or area of social change, we play one role. In another organization, we may find we fit most comfortably into another role. In addition, our roles may change over time.  The beauty of this framework is that it compels us to see these roles as equally important, even though traditionally, we may hold up Frontline Responders or Disruptors as more important than, say, the Caregivers or Storytellers. It is interesting to consider the ways that white patriarchal supremacy has infiltrated the social change ecosystem, causing us to hold certain roles as more or less valuable. Deepa and I begin the conversation by talking about co-liberation and the importance of centering anti-Black liberation as a means of liberation for all. At the same time, centering anti-Black liberation does not mean that understanding other forms of oppression is not important. Again, we must be on the lookout for the ways that supremacy divides us even in our anti-racism work. We’d be delighted to hear what questions this conversation raises for you and encourage you to take advantage of the Roles for Social Change Map and Reflection Guide (see below). Consider not only your role in your organization but also in your family and community. In this podcast, Deepa and I talked about: How galvanizing moments invite us to integrate action into our lives; What solidarity means: a bridge between our internal commitment and an active commitment to end anti-Black racism; Why a commitment to ending anti-Black racism is a commitment to ending racism altogether against everyone; Why social change work is at its core relationship building; Deepa’s Social Change Ecosystem and its roles; How to use it personally and within organizations How it can push a person to step more deeply into a role, or let go of outgrown or less aligned roles; How organizations can use it as a tool for analysis about its ecosystem Why the Ecosystem of Social Change disrupts the concept of hierarchy in social change   Bio: Deepa Iyer is a South Asian American writer, strategist, lawyer, and racial justice advocate. Currently, Deepa is a Strategic Advisor at Building Movement Project and Director of Solidarity Is, a project that provides trainings, narratives, and resources on building deep and lasting multiracial solidarity. Deepa’s areas of expertise include the post 9/11 America e

In this conversation with Ericka Hines and Heather Laine Talley, we are looking at Holidays 2020 as a new and different creature. We are approaching the holidays desperately needing connection and yet we are divided not only by our political beliefs but our differing boundaries around COVID social distancing and even our varying attachments to reality. It is tough terrain. Obviously, we need to think this through and reexamine the tools we usually bring to navigate holiday gatherings. What isn’t working? What tools might work better at bridging divides at the holiday table? For one, Ericka, Heather, and Nicole discuss the need to make our fluid and implicit boundaries clear and explicit. Will we gather in the same room with masks? Get tested prior to meeting? Skip in-person celebrations all together? We have to say out loud what we need to feel safe this season. Second, we need to shift our understanding of boundaries. Ericka brilliantly suggests that we see boundaries as a form of cooperation, not separation. For example, how might we see one’s decision to wear a mask as a “tiny gesture of care” rather than a political statement?  Third, how can we enter spaces in a way that invites our own and others’ humanity? Where “being right” isn’t as important as connecting and listening? This doesn’t mean that we avoid difficult topics, but instead, we employ curiosity, compassion, and empathy as tactics to create opportunities for transformation. No matter how righteous we feel in our beliefs, as Heather puts it, “How can I be a pleasant person that others want to be in conversation with?” We move into a fascinating exploration of “cancel culture.” We look at what “cancel culture” as a solution actually accomplishes. For example, what happens to the Amy Coopers of the world after their social media takedowns fade? Are they more or less open to antiracist practices? How is “cancel culture” supported by Black queer feminist pedagogy with its teaching “All of us or none of us”?  This holiday season, no matter how exhausted and stressed we might be, it’s so important to soften to one another’s humanity. After the bleakness of 2020, it’s medicinal to look at creative solutions for healing and thriving. Ericka Hines’ work provides us with an opportunity to do that. Black Womxn Thriving is a research and solution generating project that was born from Ericka’s own need in the workforce. Over the next decade, Ericka will be looking at what keeps Black womxn from thriving and then coming up with data-driven solutions to help Black womxn to thrive in their chosen work environments. We are thrilled to support this work Ericka was born to do. Knowing how the country’s election results were determined by the strategizing, organizing, and work of Black womxn, the very least we can do is support their care and healing through this project.  Support Black Womxn Thriving Fund: Ericka, Heather, and I talked about: Vigilance, introversion, and loneliness The need for explicit boundaries Navigating boundaries in a time where people can’t agree on what’s real Wearing masks as a gesture of care Entering conversations to create shift and possibility Compassion and empathy as tactics rather than feelings “Cancel Culture” Black queer feminists: “It’s going to be all of us or none of us.” Ericka’s new research project, Black Womxn Thriving, and its inherent optimism and vision What it means to live an “inclusive life”   Ericka Hines Ericka Hines, Principal of Every Level Leadership, is a consultant, advisor, strategist, and senior trainer who works with organizations to align their commitment to inclusion and equity with their everyday actions and operations. She has worked with government agencies, nonprofits and foundations across the country to help their staff and stakeholders learn how to work in more inclusive cultures. To date, she has trained over 8,000 indivi

“This is part of parenting. This is part of the process. If we are raising humans to live in this multicultural, multiracial society, we have an obligation first to them, but also frankly to humanity, to be willing to be vulnerable and have those deep conversations.” In celebration of Nicole’s new book, Raising Antiracist Kids: The Power of Intentional Conversations about Race and Parenting, DEI expert Desiree Adaway interviews Nicole about how to have difficult conversations with children about race. What is revealed: the research is well established and uncontroversial when it comes to what children need to understand and better navigate race and racism. They need consistent, imperfect engagement throughout their lives with their parents.  What gets in the way?  The discomfort of adults.  Throughout this conversation it becomes more and more clear: we begin with our young children with simple, basic explanations and conversations, and as they mature, so do the conversations. We weave in more nuance and complexity. This seems obvious, and yet parents and caregivers get bogged down with not having all the answers upfront, or are silenced by myths such as “my kids don’t see race” or “talking about race will scare my child.” Desiree and Nicole together make it clear that even though these conversations may be difficult for parents, for our children it eases a burden. Parents can and need to create a space for children to come and grapple without shame. Rather than having to make meaning on their own, they learn they can rely on and trust their parents for support.  Parents’ avoidance and silence give children information as well. Children learn what we believe by our body language, “shushing” and facial expressions. They learn there are certain topics that are bad or shameful. Add in racist messaging (whether implicit or explicit) from the media, our schools, and houses of worship, and with yet another generation, we’ve perpetuated a cycle of harm rather than interrupted it. This conversation is a rich one. It will give you tools and more confidence to jump in. And yet, because we are working against generations of avoidance, you may need more support. Purchase a copy of Raising Antiracist Kids: The Power of Intentional Conversations about Race and Parenting  and get in community. Gather some parenting friends together to read and support one another. Share a copy with someone else in your family to begin to shift the culture in your own extended family. And please join us in the Inclusive Life community on Facebook where you will find like minded people who are devoted to their antiracist journeys. Desiree and Nicole talked about: The origin story of Raising Antiracist Kids: The Power of Intentional Conversations about Race and Parenting Nicole’s interview project with white parents and her findings The importance of white parents learning to talk to kids about being white How children are learning about race from our non-verbal cues Why it’s important to talk to your children about race before they’re 10 years old (and actually much earlier!) How kids who say or do racist things most often are not being raised by racist parents The importance of reading children’s books about Black brilliance and Black people living normal lives The research is clear and established: we know what children need when it comes to conversations about race Doing antiracism work in community. Read Raising Antiracist Kids: The Power of Intentional Conversations About Race and Parenting with your friends and family Bio: Desiree Adaway (she/her/hers), Founder of The Adaway Group,  is a seasoned non-profit consultant, trainer, coach and speaker building resilient equitable and inclusive organizations. She has over 25 years of experience creating, leading and managing international, multicultural teams through major organizational changes in over 40 countries. Desiree has crafted and administered p

“Inclusive Life for me means our movements have an understanding that it’s your vulnerabilities that make you strong.” This conversation with Rebecca Cokley is, in part, a peek into the disability rights movement from the intimate perspective of Rebecca’s childhood. Rebecca is an only child of two disabled and rather subversive activists whose family core value was speaking up when something wrong was happening to someone else.  Cokley learns from her parents’ modeling how to navigate across movements, building coalitions to “rebuild a table that works for all of us.” She’s become a powerful and skilled advocate and policy expert for the disability community. It was fun to hear of her first encounter with Barack Obama, and how her work as his Diversity Officer in the Obama Administration made it possible for her to attend the best parties in DC all  to advance Obama’s diversity agenda. Rebecca wrote Obama’s special education policy and helped him develop his platform for people with disabilities. She has been instrumental in shaping the disability platforms of the  2020 US Presidential candidates. In fact, twelve of the candidates developed disability platforms. Rebecca was pleased to note that even as the candidates exited the Presidential race, many are still involved in politics and are showing  commitment to the platforms they adopted, influencing their work in response to the COVID pandemic. Rebecca walks us back through some of the important learnings of the disability community stemming from the AIDS epidemic and further back to the elders of the disability community: those who suffered from polio.  This is a fascinating conversation and one that will help us all better understand that liberation movements are about people, and more than anything else, we’ve got to hold onto our people. Rebecca and I talked about: How her family shaped Rebecca as a leader and connector of movements; How the activism of the disability community laid the groundwork for necessary accommodations during COVID; Rebecca’s early work promoting diversity in Victoria’s Secret, of all places; Rebecca’s work in the Obama administration as the President’s Diversity Officer; Allyship; Strategies for pushing forward change; Why Rebecca’s work writing policy for 2020 US Presidential candidates has built an important foundation for people suffering as a result of the pandemic; Why Elizabeth Warren called; What’s at stake if the Affordable Care Act is dismantled; John Lewis’s inspiring words of advice to Rebecca BIO: Rebecca Cokley is the Director of the Disability Justice Initiative at The Center for American Progress, where her work focuses on disability policy. Most recently, she served as the Executive Director of the National Council on Disability (NCD), an independent agency charged with advising Congress and the White House on issues of national disability public policy. She joined the NCD in 2013 after serving in the Obama administration for four years, including time at the Department of Education and the Department of Health and Human Services, as well as a successful stint at the White House where she oversaw diversity and inclusion efforts.  Cokley got her feet wet in advocacy while working at the Institute for Educational Leadership, where she built a number of tools and resources designed to empower and educate youth with disabilities and their adult allies. Since then, she has spent the last 15 years helping make stronger and deeper connections across civil rights communities and continues to see cross-movement solidarity as the only means of surviving these next four years. She is also currently working on her first book. In 2015, she was inducted into the inaugural class of the Susan M. Daniels Disability Mentoring Hall of Fame and was the recipient of the Frank Harkin Memorial Award by the National Council on Independent Living. Cokley has a Bachelor of Arts in politics from the Un

“I’ve got my eye on the future. The future that keeps me going forward is one that is built in a more loving way. A more compassionate world is the one that I keep in my mind’s eye as my guidepost and my true north.” – Sarah Love Politics and spirituality have a long-standing dysfunctional relationship. In this conversation with artist and writer Sarah Love and Lindsay Pera, founder of the Modern Mystic Institute, we begin to dig for the roots of this dysfunction.  We already know the damage: On the right, spirituality has been manipulated and melded with politics and patriotism to oppress people and rigidly control the narrative about values in our country. The consequences are disempowering. On one hand, we’ve got the “love and light” spiritual practitioners who resist analysis and truth-telling about political and social realities. On the other hand, we have political activists who have rejected spirituality because it’s been used to bypass the harsh realities of white supremacy, cis-hetero patriarchy, and capitalism. It’s time to rewrite the narrative and to push back on constructs that narrowly define what it means to love and what it means to be a peacemaker. What if we refuse to be divided by the pundits and politicians who insist that protest, patriotism and action have to look just so? That our protestations must be polite and palatable? What if we get super clear amidst the gaslighting about what loving our country looks like? If we are going to change the trajectory of our country, we’ve got to move forward as whole people, not as people who are compartmentalized, divided and constricted. It’s time to unapologetically reclaim, redefine and sharpen our tools. We can unapologetically infuse love and spirituality with politics and politics with spirituality. The Way Station, with Lindsay, Sarah and I as your guides, will take you deeper into this re-tooling and revision of our narrative.  The Way Station is a place for those working to dismantle systems of oppression can gather, refuel, get tools and get grounded in strategy. Participants will be bringing our political expertise as well as our embodied wisdom and intuitive tools. We will explore the ways in which we can stay active, involved, creative and aligned in this moment of flux and crisis. Expect rigor and magic, love and analysis. No matter the outcome on November 3rd, our work is not over.  We are in it for the long haul of liberation.Please join us. Sarah, Lindsay and I talked about: The ways in which we’ve been socialized to avoid discussing politics and systems of oppression; Why politically progressive people shy away from spirituality; How spirituality and politics, when used together, have historically been weaponized to oppress people; The importance of questioning, pushing back, redefining and expanding our understanding of engaging politically with the tools of faith, peacemaking and love; Our “pivot points”: those moments in our lives where we saw more clearly our role as activists and how we could wield spirituality as a powerful force for change; Our upcoming retreat, Way Station, on October 30th, which is an opportunity to come together to refuel, get tools, and ground strategies for the work ahead; Linday’s and Sarah’s divination on the energies of 2021. About Sarah and Lindsay: Sarah Love McCoy is an artist, writer and teacher working on expanding and awakening the power of love in herself and human hearts the world over. Creator of the “I Stand for Love” Calendar (in its 17th year in print!), Sarah’s best known for her daily nuggets of inspiration. The belief that healing our inner wounds, learning to trust our hearts, moving energy through our hands (while getting out of our heads) and coming together in a community as a path towards a more loving tomorrow is the philosophy behind Sarah’s mission and purpose. Lindsay Pera is the CEO of the Modern Mystics Institute and founder of