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Two Crones And A Book

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Rating
★★★★★
5
from
1 reviews
Categories
Country
United States
This podcast has
132 episodes
Language
English
Explicit
Yes
Date created
2021/07/12
Latest episode
2026/10/13
Average duration
22 min.
Release period
14 days

Description

Your hosts Chell and Annette will give you honest reviews and share book‑themed rambles that may or may not, on occasions, take a dark and twisty, if not bizarre turn. Be warned: episodes may contain spoilers and language that some listeners may find offensive, thus the explicit rating. Consider yourself warned! Now take a seat and buckle up, buttercup…

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Ep 128 Ramble If you could force one fictional character to go to therapy, who would it be?
2026/10/13
In this Ramble, the crones tackle a question that feelsboth necessary and deeply unhinged: If you could force one fictionalcharacter to go to therapy, who would it be?   Naturally, Annette and Chell take this prompt far beyond reason, dragging some of literature and film’s most iconic characters straight onto the therapist’s couch whether they like it or not. 🧙‍♀️Annette’s Pick The Body SnatchersAnnette decides the entire alien hive‑mind from Invasion of the BodySnatchers needs therapy not for their behaviour, but for their completeinability to respect personal boundaries, emotional nuance, or the concept of “maybe don’t replace people with pods.” 🧙‍♀️ Chell’s Picks Rebecca (from Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier) Chell argues that Rebecca needs therapy mostly for her selfesteem issues Tom Ripley (from The Talented Mr. Ripley by Patricia Highsmith) Tom Ripley is marched into therapy for chronic identity theft, pathological lying, and his habit of solving interpersonal conflict with delusion. Katniss Everdeen (from The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins) Katniss doesn’t get dragged she gets gently escorted. Chell gives her the compassionate therapy she deserved from page one It’s a ramble full of laughter, literary chaos, and fictional characters being lovingly forced into much‑needed mental health care. Grab a drink, settle in, and enjoy the crones as they psychoanalyse their way through pop culture.
Ep 127 Bingo A book that’s been on your shelf or TBR for far too long
2026/09/29
This week on Two Crones and a Book, the bingo wheel called the crones out — loudly. The theme? A book that’s been sitting on your shelf or lurking on your TBR for far, far too long. And oh, did the crones have some literary skeletons to drag into the light. Chell finally tackled Scare Streets, Ron Ripley’s Berkley Street series — a gritty, ghost‑ridden dive into a supernatural underbelly. Annette, meanwhile, read Small Things Like These by Claire Keegan — a quiet, devastating, beautifully crafted novella that packs more emotional punch into its slim pages than most books three times its size. It’s a cosy, emotional, slightly guilt‑tinged bingo episode full of cackles, confessions, and crone‑level insight. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #BookPodcast #BookDiscussion #BookCommunity #BookBingo #ReadingBingo #TBRShame #FinallyReadingIt #SacredStreets #RonRipley #BerkleyStreetSeries #SmallThingsLikeThese #ClaireKeegan #NovellaLove #GhostStories #IrishFiction #CroneEnergy #ChaoticReaders #BookishChaos #CronesWhoRead
Ep 126 Ramble If you could give one fictional character a completely unnecessary makeover, who are you glam‑croning and why?
2026/09/15
In this Ramble, the crones unleash their most chaotic creative energy yet as they tackle the question nobody asked but everybody should: If you could give one fictional character a completely unnecessary makeover, who are you glam‑croning and why? Naturally, Chell and Annette take this prompt to unhinged heights transforming iconic characters into versions of themselves that absolutely did not need to exist. 🧙‍♀️Annette’s Glam‑Crone Makeover Phantom of the Opera → Modern‑Day Tech Billionaire Annette drags the dramatic masked menace straight into Silicon Valley, where he becomes a brooding tech mogul disrupting opera with questionable apps, algorithmic angst, and venture‑capital cape couture. 🧙‍♀️Chell’s Glam‑Crone Makeovers Miss Havisham → Decay‑Positive Lifestyle Guru Great Expectations by Charles Dickens Chell reimagines Miss Havisham as a rot‑core wellness influencer who turns mould into a mindset and heartbreak into a brand. Lisa Evans → Liminal Transit Witch Platform 7 by Louise Doughty Lisa becomes a spectral commuter‑crone haunting train stations with petty magic and emotional wisdom. Hercule Poirot → Fussy Hedge Witch Detective The Mysterious Affair at Styles (and many others) by Agatha Christie Poirot becomes a cottage‑core witch solving tiny village disputes withherb lore and passive‑aggressive tea readings. It’s a ramble full of laughter, witchy nonsense, and makeovers nobody asked for but everyone will enjoy. Grab a drink, settle in, and let the crones glam‑crone their way through literature’s most unsuspecting characters.
Ep 125 Chat n Cackle – Summer Finds
2026/09/01
📚Chat n Cackle: Summer Reads & What’s Next (and it’s a long one!) This Chat n Cackle is a gloriously oversized one, a full hour of bookish chaos as Chell and Annette unpack everything they devoured over the summer, what they’re currently reading, and the titles already haunting their TBRs. It’s longer than usual because, frankly, the crones had a lot to say. 🧙‍♀️ Chell’s Summer Stack Chell takes a tour through courtroom suspense in Judge Stone by Viola Davies & James Patterson, the creeping dread of Starving Saints by Caitlin Starling, and the reflective emotional journey of The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. She also shares two bite-sized horrors, Helpmeet by Naben Ruthnum and Crossroads by Laurel Hightower, plus the vampiric chills of The Brides by Charlotte Cross, the powerful historical fiction of The Women by Kristin Hannah, and the tense mystery of The Caretaker by Marcus Kiewer. 📖 Now Reading:  Cabin in the Woods by Sarah Alderson  🔮 Next Up:  The House at Phantom Park by Graham Masterton  🧙‍♀️ Annette’s Recent Reads Annette brings an equally eclectic pile, starting with the uncanny and unmatched Knock Knock Open Wide by Neil Sharpson and the eerie and wonderfully bizarre Crypt of the Moon Spider by Nathan Ballingrud. She also dives into epic adventures of The HMRC (Her Majesty's Royal Coven) Trilogy by Juno Dawson, the survival-driven tension of What We Did to Survive by Megan Lally, and the heartfelt contemporary fiction of Things You Save in a Fire by Katherine Center. 📖 Now Reading:  Graveyard Shifts by M. L. Rio, Helen of Nowhere by Makenna Goodman, and Mythos by Stephen Fry  🔮 Next Up: Clown in a Cornfield 4 – Lights! Camera! Frendo! by Adam Cesare It’s a longer episode, but that just means more laughs, more recommendations, and more chances to grow your already unmanageable TBR pile. Grab a drink, get comfy, and settle in for an hour with the Two Crones. #twocronesandabook #summerreads # books #podcast #funny
Ep 124 Ramble - What’s the most unhinged place you’ve ever read a book
2026/08/18
This week on Two Crones and a Book, we’re confessing thetruly unhinged places we’ve cracked open a book. From questionable public seating to wildly inconvenient life moments, we reveal the spots where our need to read absolutely overpowered common sense.   Expect cackling, judgement (mostly of ourselves), and the comforting knowledge that no matter where you’ve read… we’ve probably readsomewhere stranger.   SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠   #TwoCronesAndABook #ChaoticReaders #UnhingedReadingSpots#BookishRamble #CroneEnergy
Ep 123 Bingo A book published in a decade before you were born
2026/08/04
This week on Two Crones and a Book, the bingo wheel whisked the crones back in time — to stories born long before either of them arrived on this earth. And oh, did they dig up some strange treasures. Chell plunged into The Beetle by Richard Marsh, a gloriously bizarre slice of Victorian horror packed with melodrama, shapeshifting menace, and enough gothic chaos to make even Dracula look like he needs to up his game. She unravels the wild plot twists, the theatrical dread, and the deliciously unhinged energy that only 1890s fiction can deliver. Annette, meanwhile, explored The Birds by Frank Baker — the eerie, atmospheric novel that pre‑dated Hitchcock and brought a quieter, more creeping sense of dread to the idea of nature turning against us. She dives into its slow‑burn tension, its uncanny mood, and the unsettling feeling that something feathered is always watching. Together, the crones compare two very different flavours of vintage terror — one campy and chaotic, one quiet and creeping — and celebrate the strange magic of reading stories from decades past. It’s another bingo adventure full of cackles, analysis, and peak crone energy. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠⁠[email protected]⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #BookPodcast #BookDiscussion #BookCommunity #BookBingo #ReadingBingo #VintageReads #BeforeWeWereBorn #TheBeetle #RichardMarsh #VictorianHorror #GothicFiction #TheBirds #FrankBaker #ClassicCreeps #OldSchoolHorror #CroneEnergy #ChaoticReaders #BookishChaos #CronesWhoRead
Ep 122 Ramble - Which book would you confidently lie about having read
2026/07/21
This week on Two Crones and a Book, we open the dustycupboard of literary shame and ask the big question: Which book would you confidently lie about having read? Join us as we confess the classics we’ve dodged, the doorstoppers we’ve pretended to ‘love’ and the titles we only know from memes. Expect cackling, guilt‑free honesty, and the occasional dramatic gasp as weexpose each other’s bookish secrets. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠   #TwoCronesAndABook #BookishConfessions #RambleEpisode#LiteraryLies #BookPodcast
Ep 121 Bingo A book recommended by someone you know
2026/07/07
This week on Two Crones and a Book, the bingo wheel sent the crones down the path of personal recommendations — and the results could not have been more unsettling, eerie, or deliciously crone‑appropriate. Chell tackled I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman, a stark, haunting, post‑apocalyptic tale that blends isolation, mystery, and existential dread. She dives into the emotional weight, the unanswered questions, and the quiet devastation that makes this slim novel linger long after the final page. Annette, meanwhile, read Victorian Psycho by Virginia Feito, a stylish psychological thriller dripping with gothic tension and razor‑sharp character work. She explores the spiralling mind games, the creeping paranoia, and the elegant menace that defines Feito’s storytelling. Together, the crones unpack how recommendations from friends can lead to wildly different reading experiences — from bleak dystopian introspection to lush psychological unraveling. It’s another bingo episode full of cackles, opinions, and peak crone energy. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #BookPodcast #BookDiscussion #BookCommunity #ReadersOfInstagram #BookChat #BookTalk #BookBingo #ReadingBingo #RecommendedReads #FriendRecs #IWhoHaveNeverKnownMen #JacquelineHarpman #DystopianReads #PostApocalypticFiction #VictorianPsycho #VirginiaFeito #PsychologicalThriller #GothicVibes #CroneEnergy #ChaoticReaders #BookishChaos #CronesWhoRead
Ep 120 Ramble - What’s a book title that perfectly sums up your life or at least your last week
2026/06/23
In this week’s ramble, the crones dive into the strangely therapeutic art of diagnosing your life with book titles. Because sometimes the only way to make sense of a week is to let literature do the talking.   Annette arrives armed with a trio of titles that paint a picture all on their own: the existential haze of The Plague by Albert Camus, the tender exhaustion of If the Body Allows It by Megan Cummins and the slow, contemplative survival energy of The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating by Elisabeth Tova Bailey. If that doesn’t sum up a week, what does.   Chell, meanwhile, needs only one title to capture the full emotional landscape: A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snickett. Sometimes simplicity is the most honest form of storytelling.   Together, the crones unpack why these titles hit so hard,how books become emotional shorthand and what it means when your life starts sounding like a syllabus of chaos.   Settle in for a cozy, candid, and slightly unhinged chat because if you can’t laugh at your own plot twists, what’s the point. #BookTitlesAsMood #LifeInBookTitles #BookishRamble #TwoCronesAndABook #ThePlague #AlbertCamus#IfTheBodyAllowsIt #MeganCummins #TheSoundOfAWildSnailEating #ElisabethTovaBailey#ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents #LemonySnicket #ChaoticWeekReads #ExistentialReads #BookishHumor #ReadersOfInstagram #BookPodcast
Ep 119 BINGO A book with a colour in the title
2026/06/14
This week on Two Crones and a Book, the bingo wheel demanded colour and the crones delivered. Chell dives into Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey, a memoir‑meets‑life‑philosophy mashup full of wild stories, questionable decisions and the kind of cosmic yee‑haw wisdom only McConaughey can get away with. Was it profound? Was it unhinged? Was it both? Chell has thoughts. Meanwhile, Annette ventures into the haunting world of The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. She unpacks the creeping dread, the feminist fury, and the wallpaper pattern that absolutely refuses to mind its own business. Together, the crones compare notes on colour, chaos, and how two books with hues in their titles can live on completely different ends of the literary spectrum. Grab your bingo cards, settle in, and let the crones guide you through another gloriously bookish adventure. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #BookPodcast #ReadersOfInstagram #BookDiscussion #BookCommunity #PodcastLife #BookChat #BookTalk #BookBingo #ReadingBingo #ColourInTheTitle #ColourReads #ThemedReading #Greenlights #MatthewMcConaughey #McConaugheyMemoir #AlrightAlrightAlright #MemoirLovers #TheYellowWallpaper #CharlottePerkinsGilman #ClassicLit #FeministLit #GothicFiction #CroneEnergy #ChaoticReaders #BookishChaos #CronesWhoRead
Ep 118 Ramble Imagine you could teleport into a book during its most dramatic moment what would you do to help (or cause more trouble)
2026/05/26
This week on Two Crones and a Book, we ask the only question that truly matters: If you could teleport into a book’s most dramatic moment… would you help, or would you absolutely make it worse? Spoiler: we chose chaos. And trouble. And maybe a little light meddling that would make any author weep. Join us as we insert ourselves into iconic scenes, derail plot lines, rescue characters who didn’t ask for it and accidentally (on purpose) spark new disasters. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE.   Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠   #TwoCronesAndABook #BookChaos #TeleportTrouble #FictionalMeddling #BookPodcast #CroneEnergy
Ep 117 Bingo - A book outside your comfort zone
2026/05/12
This week on Two Crones and a Book, we dust off our bingo cards and dive headfirst into the square that made us both sweat a little: Read Something Out of Your Comfort Zone.   Chell wandered into the wild world of small‑town secrets and menopausal mayhem with A Hot Flash of Homicide by Dawn Dugle and let’s just say the title does not exaggerate. Meanwhile, Annette took a hard left turn into the unsettling, unforgettable, and deeply disturbing with Let’s Go Play at the Adams by Mendal W. Johnson.   Join us as we unpack what shocked us, what surprised us and what we’ll never emotionally recover from. Expect cackles, side‑eye and the occasional existential crisis.   SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE.   Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠   #TwoCronesAndABook #BookBingo #OutOfYourComfortZone#PodcastReads #BookishChaos #HotFlashOfHomicide #LetsGoPlayAtTheAdams#ReadingChallenge
Ep 116 Ramble - If your life were a book what would be the first line of the prologue
2026/04/28
This week, the crones crack open the metaphorical spineof their own lives and ask the ultimate storytelling question: If your life were a book, what would be the first line of the prologue?   From dramatic declarations to dry sarcasm, Annette andChell explore how one sentence can set the tone for an entire existence or at least the current chapter. Expect existential musings, chaotic energy, and a few lines that probably belong in a gothic novella or a dark comedy.   Whether your prologue starts with “It wasn’t supposed togo like this…” or “She woke up already tired of everything,” this episode is a celebration of the weird, wonderful ways we narrate our own lives.   Grab your imaginary quill, your emotional baggage, andyour favourite cup of tea this one’s a cozy spiral into literaryself-reflection.   #LifeAsABook #PrologueEnergy #FirstLineVibes#TwoCronesAndABook #BookishRamble #BookishHumor #ReadersOfInstagram#BookPodcast #NarrateYourLife #StoryOfMyLife #ChaoticPrologue #CozyChaos#BookishThoughts #LiteraryLife #SelfNarration
Ep 115 Bingo - A book set in a place you've never visited
2026/04/14
This week on Two Crones and a Book, Annette and Chell spin the bingo wheel and land on the prompt: A place you’ve never been. From the depths of the ocean to the winding paths of a magical house, theCrones take you on a journey through two wildly different realms of fantasy.     🧠 Annette dives into the abyss with Point Nemo by Jeremy Robinson, narrated by R.C. Bray. It’s a mind-bending, bioluminescent romp through the most remote spot on Earth, where science fiction meets cosmic horror and the mushrooms glow withmenace.     🏡 Chell wanders the whimsical corridors of Howls Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones, specifically the illustrated Folio Society edition. With its enchanting artwork and classic Wynne Jones charm, this tale of magical misdirection and reluctant heroism offers a cozy counterpoint to Annette’s deep-sea dread.     Together, they explore how unfamiliar settings shape character, tone, and reader experience—and how fantasy lets us travel to places we may never physically reach, but can always visit in story.     SPOLIERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANUGAUGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠        TwoCronesAndABook #BookBingo #FantasyReads #ReadingChallenge#APlaceYouveNeverBeen #ImaginaryPlaces #FantasyWorlds #MagicalJourneys #PointNemo #JeremyRobinson #RCBray #HouseOfManyWays #DianaWynneJones #FolioSociety #HowlsMovingCastle #AudiobookLove #IllustratedEdition#BookDiscussion #FantasyPodcast
Ep 114 Chat N Cackle - Our Year In Reads (So Far)
2026/03/31
In this delightfully chaotic 'Chat n’ Cackle' episode, Annette and Chell settle in with cups of something cosy and dive into the books that have shaped their reading year so far. From eerie horror valleys to motel mysteries, from heartfelt memoirs to unsettling classics, the Crones cover a stack of stories that made them gasp, giggle, or stay up far too late. This episode’s reading pile includes: This Wretched Valley by Jenny Kiefer Dungeon Crawler Carl by Matt Dinniman The Lamb by Lucy Rose Come Closer by Sara Gran The Sun Down Motel by Simone St. James Half His Age by Jennette McCurdy The Plague Dogs by Richard Adams Play Nice by Rachel Harrison • Raising Hare by Chloe Dalton We Call Them Witches by India-Rose Bower Expect tangents, laughter, strong opinions, and the kind of bookish chaos only Annette and Chell can conjure. Whether you’ve read these titles or are just here for the cackles, this episode is a warm, witty wander through their current literary landscape. SPOLIERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANUGAUGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠[email protected]⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #ChatNCackle #CroneEnergy #BookPodcast #BookishCrones #ReadingCrones #WhatWeRead #CurrentReads #BookChat #BookDiscussion #HorrorBooks #FantasyReads #MemoirReads #BookTalk #IndiePodcasters #WomenWhoPodcast #BookishCommunity #BookLovers #TBRPile #BookRecs

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5 out of 5
1 reviews
★★★★★
Bluepatter 2025/05/30
Charmers
Absolutely adore these ladies. Charming, smart, and saucy.
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