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She fell in love with her best friend, flatmate, and confidant over three years and he likes her too, just not in the same way... In this episode, I'm answering an AudaciTea submission from a listener going through one of the most quietly devastating situations: loving someone deeply, having that love somewhat reciprocated, and still having to say goodbye, maybe forever. If you've ever loved someone you couldn't have, whether because of timing, circumstance, or distance, this episode is for you. 💬 Got a question? Submit it here: https://tally.so/r/WOZ1zv 📱 Follow along on Instagram @itsjanani for more.

We are the first generation of women who might actually stay single, not because we can't find love, but because we’re done settling. In this episode, I get into why modern women are choosing themselves over outdated gender roles, and how men still benefit from a version of patriarchy they’ve never had to question. From emotional unavailability to weaponized incompetence, I talk about how so many men are still operating from a playbook handed down by their dads, while we’ve had to rewrite ours from scratch. It’s not that we hate men... we just want them to catch up. This one’s for the girls who feel like the bar is in hell, and the men who might just be ready to listen.

Ever heard the phrase "You can do so much better than him" from your girlfriends? Yeah...maybe that's not really nice to tell someone. I know this might not seem like the best thing to hear, it might even feel like I'm betraying my girls who make dating in today's world, so much more bearable. I know that I rely on my female friendships to get me through this crazy time. But you ever wonder if maybe their advice is actually stopping you from getting the love you want? Maybe there's some projections of insecurities happening? Sometimes, even though the intentions are good, it feels like getting shamed for the choices you make. Whatever you want from a relationship is personal to you and your partner. You don't owe anyone any explanations.

No one can dumb-b*tch harder than this bish. In my journey of dating in a more healthy way, I kinda sorta self sabotaged myself. Luckily I made it out with a slightly bruised ego but learn from my mistakes. If you like a guy, probably don't tell him at a SINGLES MIXER event that was CURATED for both of you to find other potential mates. It's like bringing sand to the beach. Dating is a meat market whether its on the apps or on the field. But I stand by asking for what you want, just a bit more strategically I guess.

Happy New Year! It's time to get focused and get ready for a new chapter for the podcast. Join me in my journey to disassemble the patriarchy, get educated, get less hostile and more communicative through this podcast. This year I want to not just talk about the topics we should be talking about but also build resources, have important takeaways and solutions or at the least, cultivate a support system. Expect more social commentary, more lewd jokes ( I will never stop making dirty jokes), laughter and lighthearted heaviness.

It's time to detox from toxic dating cycles. I really can't deal with the dating app culture anymore, it just leaves me feeling so empty and worthless. An endless cycle of situationships, half-getting to know someone, silently stalking them on social media for years just to avoid the feeling that you'll never find love - I am sick of it. There is so much more I want to do with my time and energy and so much that I've wasted on the idea of "happily ever after". Time to take it off the pedestal and call out the apps for how much they seem to be profiting off of our insecurities. I need a time out in 2025.

This is the story of a boy, a girl, goatees and really hard nipples. What better way to start Virgo season than spilling the tea on a Virgo boy and my cougar crush. I just had to get this story out there because this is the only way I turn lemons into juicy content. I do wanna say though, who's not an idiot at 24? I know I was. Fair warning however, don't date people who's prefrontal cortex still has some developing to do. Disclaimer: all people mentioned in this story who probably know who they are, I just wanna say - this is definitely not about you. Everything is purely coincidental.

I am back after a looong break and boy have I missed recording my ramblings. It has been a crazy two years filled with failure, heartbreak, loss of jobs, an ADHD diagnosis and turning 30 - basically still having no idea where my life is headed and no plan for it either. But I can't help but think of this as an opportunity to get back to the things I love and sharing my stories to make someone feel less alone but most importantly, help me make sense of this chaotic life and all that comes with it.

I hate to admit it, but it's good. Like indulging in a snack that's definitely not good for you, sex with toxic guys is like Mcdonalds at midnight. But it goes deeper than that. Wanting connection is in our nature as human beings, but insecurities are the tricky part of the equation that our animal instincts don't know how to configure. We are taught how to love and be loved, that plays a pivotal role in our sex lives. So when we learn that love is conditional or to be earned, we end up in toxic relationships with mind blowing sex. But are we doomed to be in the loop of toxic relationships? Will I be able to accept healthy relationships with love that is unconditional? And why is the perfect recipe for an orgasm, anxiety and attachment issues?  SUPPORT THE PODCAST ☼ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notallowed.in/ ☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/ ☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani

I love New Years because it feels like we all collectively hit the refresh button. And if there's anything I want, it's hitting refresh on the last few months of 2022. Entering this new year wasn't the most exciting time for some of us going through rougher parts of life. Getting fired, being dumped, losing someone - you feel like you're drowning and suddenly it's a new year and you have to figure it out. You desperately want a fresh start but some old wounds are still healing. I'm here to remind you that you *don't* need to figure it all out. What you do need to do, is be less ashamed of where you are, less critical of your desires and more optimistic that you're trying your best. A new year can be a new start, but it can also be a chance to change your perspective and do an inventory of things you're truly grateful for.  ☼ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notallowed.in/ ☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/ ☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani

Welcome to SEASON 3 BABY!! With more real and (hopefully) relatable stories and experiences - in conversation with friends, family and the real people experiencing the world that celebrities aren't. We're kicking off this season with my Leo, bad bitch, 26F friend Veena. We talk all about our dating stories -matching with the same guy, lets call him Mr Pringles, sending 'thank you' messages after sex, being into the tall-skinny-with-glasses boy, and discussing the possibility of considering arranged marriages.  We had so much conversation to cover that THIS IS ONLY PART 1! Stay tuned for Part 2. ☼ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notallowed.in/ ☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/ ☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani

Is it worth risking a friendship to pursue something more? I never really got the people that say that their partner is their best friend. On paper it seems like a good idea to date a friend but to me friendships have a different dynamic. Conversely, could we remain friends with an ex? It's hard to switch relationship dynamics back and forth because feelings are complicated and things get messy. Then of course, there's always that ONE friend you wonder about. The one you have insane chemistry with, palpable sexual tension, you can't stand when they're with someone else - yet it never goes anywhere beyond a friendship. But a part of you always longs for it. If we cross the friendship line, is there any going back? Will it be the most passionate, beautiful love affair? Or do we risk losing both the friendship and the person? ☼ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notallowed.in/ ☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/ ☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani

Why do we feel like a failure when we aren't in a relationship or haven't found the 'one'. We have put traditional monogamous relationship structures on a pedestal and failed to give credit to new relationship structures that might actually work for us and our modern lives. Entering the dating world, expecting to find the ONE just sends us on a spiral of constant disappointments and slowly shattering our self esteem. But what if for a change, we didn't see ourselves as failures. Is it possible to re-wire our outlook on what kind of relationships work for us? What kind of partners we're subconsciously attracting? And how traditional relationship structures could be a trap people are stuck in, but find it hard to get out of because society rewards them for being in it. ☼ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notallowed.in/ ☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/ ☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani

Quitting a job is not always easy, the mental exhaustion of the decision, taking the step that's right for you and disrupting a cushy stable routine. It's not easy but it is something we all have done or will do at some point. Our jobs and careers can be strongly tied to our self worth and sense of purpose in this world. Quitting can therefore feel like a failure, when in reality it is an opportunity. An opportunity to re-asses, re-build and get on the path that was meant for us instead of the path we 'think' we should be on.  ☼ Blog - https://www.notallowed.in/ ☼ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notallowed.in/ ☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/ ☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani

Honestly, “taking it slow” can mean “this is never happening”. Some of us have been benched, waiting on guys to finally be ready to commit, finally be ready to be in a relationship if we just hold out long enough. But the truth is that no one has the f*cking time. If its not a hell yes then its a hell no. We got shit to do, dreams to make come true and careers to build. No one is worth the wait, and you’re too worthy to be waiting. ☼ Blog - https://www.notallowed.in/ ☼ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/notallowed.in/ ☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/ ☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani