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Ever picked up your phone for a quick 5 minute scroll, only to realise 45 minutes have disappeared? Or found yourself scrolling even when you're not actually enjoying it? Our ADHD brains crave novelty, stimulation & rewards - and our smartphones offer an endless supply... But at what cost? In this episode, we're exploring: Why ADHD brains are so drawn to our phones & the dopamine they offer.How scrolling becomes an automatic habit, even when we want to stop.The impact constant stimulation can have on our attention, relationships & ADHD symptoms.Why scrolling isn't always the rest we think it is.How our phones can become a way to escape uncomfortable thoughts & feelings.What we might be missing when we fill every spare moment with stimulation. This isn't about ditching your phone or adding another thing to feel guilty about. It's about getting curious about our phone use & asking one important question: Where do I WANT to spend my attention? > Click here for the Smartphone Compulsion Test mentioned in this episode. LINKS TO GOOD SH*T FROM NAVIGATING ADULT ADHD: *Discover how to work with your ADHD brain - checkout our ADHD tools, workbooks & resources  *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Ever feel like you can't trust yourself to follow through, make good decisions or stick to your plans? When you have ADHD, years of forgotten appointments, abandoned projects & broken promises to yourself can leave you feeling like you're the one person you can't rely on. But what if self-trust isn't about getting everything right? In this episode, we're talking about: Why adults with ADHD often struggle with self-trustThe sneaky ways low self-trust shows up in everyday lifeHow seeking other people's approval can undermine our confidenceWhy validating your feelings & honouring your needs mattersTwo simple ways to start rebuilding trust in yourself Because self-trust isn't about knowing you'll never mess up. It's about knowing you can handle things when you do. LINKS TO MORE STUFF FROM US: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

In this episode, we're talking about why so many adults with ADHD struggle with self-confidence, the sneaky ways we destroy it & how to start building it without needing to become a completely different person. We'll explore: Why your thoughts about yourself matter more than you realise3 things that destroy self-confidence (hello, perfectionism!)3 practical ways to start building confidenceWhy self-acceptance doesn't mean giving up on improvingHow courage & self-compassion help you have your own back Because self-confidence isn't built by never messing up. It's built by knowing that even when you mess up, you'll support yourself. [Xena also suggests checking out episode #49: ADHD & Self-esteem] LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Do you struggle to speak up, ask for what you need or worry that advocating for yourself will make you seem “difficult”? In this episode, we’re talking about self-advocacy with ADHD & why learning to have your own back can be especially important when you’ve spent years believing you were the problem. We’ll cover: Why late-diagnosed ADHDers can find self-advocacy so uncomfortableThe difference between being assertive & aggressiveHow self-awareness helps you figure out what you actually needMy 2 questions for navigating difficult conversationsPractical ways to advocate for yourself at work, home & medical appointmentsWhy speaking up is still a win, even when you don’t get the answer you wanted Plus, the story of a very disappointing glass of bubbles that sparked this whole conversation 🥂 LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Ever spend the whole day exhausted, promise yourself an early night… then suddenly it’s midnight & your brain has decided NOW is the perfect time to come alive?  In this episode, we’re talking about ADHD & sleep & why getting to bed, falling asleep & actually feeling rested can be such a bloody struggle. We’ll cover: Why some ADHD body clocks naturally run laterBedtime procrastination, time blindness & the “just one more thing” trapWhy nighttime can feel like the only part of the day that’s actually yoursRacing thoughts, stimulation & why lying quietly in the dark doesn’t always helpPractical, ADHD-friendly ways to make sleep easierWhy poor sleep can make ADHD feel even louderWhen sleep problems might be worth looking into properly Plus, plenty of very relatable examples of what our brains get up to when they should be sleeping. LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Why can your ADHD brain receive 10 lovely comments… then obsess over the ONE person who criticised you? In this episode, we’re talking about RSD, its lesser-known flip side RRE (Recognition Responsive Euphoria) & why genuine recognition can have such a powerful impact on ADHD brains. We’ll cover: Why rejection & criticism can hit so bloody hardWhy ADHD brains can forget the good & cling to the badHow recognition can boost motivation, energy & confidenceWhy you need to create your own File of Fantastic ShitWhat to put in it & when to use it Because sometimes your brain needs reminding of the evidence it conveniently forgot… LINKS TO GOOD SH*T FROM XENA: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Ever wondered why one tiny thing can suddenly send you from “I’m fine” to “I absolutely cannot deal with this”? In this episode, we’re talking about the Window of Tolerance & why understanding this is incredibly helpful when you have ADHD. You’ll learn: Why your capacity can look completely different from one day to the nextThe difference between the red zone, blue zone & being inside your windowHow stress, sensory overload, emotions and everyday ADHD demands can push us outside itWhy feeling safe matters to our nervous systemSimple ways to regulate, build capacity & widen your window of tolerance Resource mentioned:  Breathing Techniques to Reduce Stress and Anxiety - Dr. Andrew Huberman on the Physiological Sigh CONNECT WITH & WORK WITH XENA: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Dopamine gets ALL the attention in the ADHD world… but what about endorphins? These little feel-good chemicals can help take the edge off stress, support your mood & make life feel just a bit easier. And the best part? Some of the easiest ways to get them are actually pretty fun. In this episode, we’re talking about: What endorphins actually are & why they matterWhy movement can help shift your ADHD stateThe very legitimate benefits of laughing your arse offHow singing, music & dancing can help when you’re stressed or stuckWhy doing something slightly hard can leave you feeling surprisingly goodHow to bring more play into your life  Plus, I’m setting you a simple 7-day Endorphin Experiment so you can find out what genuinely helps YOU feel better. LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM XENA: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

One Saturday morning, I ended up in the ER saying, “I think I’m having a heart attack.” Two weeks later, I had a diagnosis I’d barely heard of: POTS, Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome. In this episode, I’m sharing what happened, what POTS actually is & the interesting overlap researchers are seeing between POTS, ADHD & other neurodivergent conditions. We’ll talk about: The weird symptoms that finally made me realise something wasn’t rightWhat POTS actually does to your bodyThe connection between POTS and neurodivergenceCommon symptoms, triggers and co-occurring conditionsWhat diagnosis & management can look likeWhy understanding what your body is doing can change everything If you’ve ever thought, “Why does my body do this weird sh*t?” this one is worth a listen. RESOURCE MENTIONED: https://www.dysautonomianz.co.nz/ Important: POTS symptoms can overlap with other medical conditions, so please don’t diagnose yourself from a podcast or smartwatch. If something here sounds familiar, speak with your doctor. LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM XENA: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Your brain does some weird shit. The good news? A lot of it makes more sense once you understand what’s actually going on behind the scenes. In this episode, I’m sharing 15 fascinating brain facts, psychology quirks & simple hacks that explain why we think, feel & behave the way we do. We cover: Why asking someone for a small favour can actually make them like you moreWhy embarrassing memories seem to stick around foreverThe spotlight effect & why people notice you far less than you thinkHow naming an emotion can help turn down its intensityWhy walking can boost creativity & help you get unstuckA few surprisingly simple ways to support focus, memory & learning (including chewing gum!) Basically, your brain is doing weird sh*t for surprisingly logical reasons. And once you know what it’s up to, you can start working with it. WANT MORE? *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

I named my ADHD brain Kevin. Why? Because when Kevin tells me I’m a failure, catastrophises over one tiny mistake or starts replaying something embarrassing I said three days ago, it’s much easier to go, “Yep, Kevin’s being dramatic again”… And create some separation. In this episode, I’m sharing why naming your brain can be such a powerful way to create distance from your inner critic, reduce rumination & stop treating yourself like an a*****e. We cover: Why that mean voice in your head can slowly erode your self-esteemThe science & psychology behind naming your brainHow naming your brain helps you separate you from the mental noiseThe 3 simple steps to name your own brain, notice its patterns & talk back to it Because your brain is a storyteller, not a fortune teller. And sometimes Kevin needs to sit the f*ck down. WANT TO WORK WITH XENA? *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

When both partners have ADHD, relationships can be full of fun, spontaneity, creativity & a deep sense of “you just get me.”  But two ADHD brains can also mean double the executive dysfunction, emotional dysregulation, RSD, impulsivity & forgotten life admin. In this episode, I’m exploring what happens when ADHD meets ADHD in a relationship & why having the same diagnosis doesn’t mean having the same brain. We’ll talk about: Why RSD + RSD can turn a conversation about dirty dishes into a full-blown relationship argumentWhat happens when two emotionally dysregulated brains trigger each otherExecutive dysfunction, unequal mental loads and the dreaded “I thought YOU were doing it”How completely different ADHD profiles can clashMoney, impulsivity, sex & intimacy The genuinely GOOD parts of being with someone whose brain works a little like yours8 practical tools to help you communicate, regulate, stay connected & build systems that actually work for both of you FOR MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US - CHECK OUT:  *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

When we talk about ADHD, we spend a lot of time talking about dopamine... but what if we've been overlooking another brain chemical that could make a real difference? In this episode, we're exploring oxytocin. Often called the connection chemical or the love drug,  oxytocin plays an important role in helping us feel safe & connected. It also works closely alongside dopamine, making it especially relevant for ADHD brains. We'll unpack what oxytocin is, why it matters & simple, practical ways you can increase it in everyday life. From hugs & pets to voice notes, nature walks & meaningful conversations, you'll discover why connection isn't just a nice idea... it may actually help support your ADHD brain. In this episode you'll learn: How oxytocin and dopamine work together in the ADHD brainWhy connection can support emotional regulation, relationships, motivation & impulse controlThe surprising difference between texting & hearing someone's voiceWhy walking with a friend might be one of the best things you can do for your brainSimple, ADHD-friendly ways to increase oxytocin every day LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Why is it that we can be calm, focused & capable in a crisis, but feel completely paralysed by a simple phone call? In this episode, I share the story of breaking down alone on a pitch-black country road & how I handled it like a f*cking boss.  In this episode, we cover: Why ADHD brains can work better in a crisisThe role of dopamine, norepinephrine & stimulationWhy clear, urgent problems can feel easier than vague everyday tasksHow relying on panic & last-minute pressure can lead to burnoutWhy coping well in the moment does not mean your body is not stressedHow to borrow from “crisis mode” without creating an actual crisis HERE'S MORE GOOD SH*T FROM NAVIGATING ADULT ADHD: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

ADHD is often described as a problem with focus, organisation & hyperactivity, but that leaves out a huge part of the picture. In this episode, we are exploring five things doctors can still get wrong about adult ADHD, including: Why emotional dysregulation is a major part of ADHDWhy success does not rule out a diagnosisHow ADHD in women can hide behind anxiety, depression & competenceThe impact hormones can have on symptoms & medicationWhy ADHD is not an inability to pay attention We also look at why lived experience matters, how outdated assumptions can lead to people being dismissed & what a fuller understanding of ADHD can look like. LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US: *Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain *Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool) *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD *Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List *Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena *Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community  *Come hang out with me on Instagram!