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"I MUST EXPRESS MYSELF. IF YOU DON'T LET ME, I WILL GO INSANE AND I WILL TAKE YOU WITH ME!!!" This, of course, is a slightly modified line from Beetlejuice (1988) spoken by the late Catherine O'Hara. Yes, unfortunately we have lost another icon. Everyone pay your respects to this fabulous diva by watching one of her many great works in both film and television. She deserves it! In other, slightly more uplifting news, the Grammys happened. Well... Addison did not win :( . At least we got to see Chappell Roan flashing her tits on the red carpet! She really ate up all those other hoes. Most importantly, I saw Charli XCX's new film The Moment (2026) and I can confidently tell you that this film IS, in fact, the moment. Also, how about the Kylie Jenner cameo?! She's definitely giving Kim a run for her money with the acting chops! Lastly, I try out a new podcast ending by establishing the "Girlblogger lesson learned of the week". Can you guess what I decided on for this episode? Listen now! 3

THE WORLD IS IN PERIL! Well, at least we have a woman on TikTok to entertain us with her bizarre eating habits. Through the dark times we must always find a bit of light to guide us forward, and for me, that light is a blonde english teacher named Courtney Cook. She eats soup dumplings, she drenches everything in mayo, and she reassures us that we're "not stressin'". After I gab about Courtney, I move on to a more disappointing topic. As suspected, Ryan Murphy's new show The Beauty is a flop. However, it was quite fun to see Bella Hadid drink out of a public toilet! Also, in case you didn't hear, Sydney Sweeney might be in legal trouble for vandalizing the Hollywood sign with bras from her new lingerie line, SYRN. I don't know about you, but I'm about as sick of Sydney's tits as I am of the weak water pressure in my off-price bidet. Lastly, I get into the new trailer that just dropped for the upcoming America's Next Top Model documentary on Netflix. Fingers crossed we get to see the full outrageousness of Tyra's crazy! Listen now 3

I DO NOT WANT TO RECONCILE WITH MY FAMILY!!! That's what I texted my family group chat after they criticized my Ambrosia salad on Christmas. Similarly, the son of our queen Victoria Beckham has also severed ties with his family. The majority of this episode is all about the current drama between Brooklyn Beckham and his fam. There's so much to cover! Like how his wife Nicola tried to unalive her nanny. After that drama, I move on to the gay spectacle happening with the cast of Queer Eye. Karamo really said "I HATE YOU ALL" and dipped. Lastly, I have to touch on the recently released text conversations between Blake Lively and Taylor Swift. Spoiler alert: they're not that interesting, but I do respect Taylor for being cvnty via text. Listen now! 3

Jennifer Lopez looks like sh!t and Julia Roberts spewed hate during her award presentation! Well, not exactly, but both of those statements are versions of takes I have on this year's Golden Globes. Listen to me share my thoughts on host Nikki Glaser, Ariana Grande's eyebrows, and Paul Thomas Anderson's tendency to flip-flop in catering between gays and straights. After all that noise, I move on to the more peaceful topic of a violent horror film about a rabid chimpanzee. I highly suggest everyone go see the movie Primate (2025) if you want to develop a phobia of monkeys! Then on to more serious things like Mattel's new autistic Barbie. I just ordered one! I cannot wait to play with her fidget spinner and her alternative communication tablet! Lastly, I play some clips of Hilary Duff's raunchy new single, "Roommates". Who knew that Lizzie McGuire could be such a little harlot! Listen now 3

"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullsh!t" These are the words we're living by in our year of 2026! Please pray that this year will bring goodness into our world other than a show about gay hockey players. Things were pretty bleak in 2025! Anyway, this episode has a great handful of fun topics. First, I must dive into Bianca Censori's latest endeavors as an on-stage performance artist. Apparently, if you want to put on a show, all you need is five contortionist models to wear masks of your face and then pose as furniture. It's a surefire way to turn heads! Next, I can't help but bring up Nicki Minaj's bizarre and unfortunate new political identity. Does she really think a red hat over a pink wig is going to make the Barbz happy?! Because it has not. Next I discuss the new Josh Safdie film, Marty Supreme (2025). The film is the equivalent to a chicken with it's head cutoff. That said, I very much enjoyed the movie and Timothée did not use a butt double for his spanking scene! Lastly, I have to pick apart the "toxic mom group" article that Ashley Tisdale (French?) insisted on writing for The Cut. Spoiler alert: Ashley is tone-deaf. Listen now! 3

We came to the cottage... and our lives changed forever. This episode me and my gay bff Connor (@connorxbowman) do a deep dive into the best show ever created. I am of course talking about the gay hockey romance sensation that is known as Heated Rivalry. I mention several times in this episode that this show has changed my body chemistry, and I assure you that I'm being completely sincere. That's because not only does this show tantalize us with perfectly sculpted hockey asses, but it also delivers the most powerful love story ever told. That is the love between yearning athletes, and a smoothie barista, as they try to navigate the stigma around homosexual romance. Needless to say, we cannot get enough of this show, so we break down each episode and share every last thought we have to give on this masterpiece. Listen now! 3

What exactly is love? Well, apparently it consists of workplace infidelity, HR violations, language barriers, and confessing your infatuation to your best friend's wife via cue cards. Yes! This episode me and my girl Olivia Krauss (@oliviakrauss) discuss not only the morally corrupt film Love, Actually (2003) but also the timeless classic, Home Alone (1990) which we discover is an equally odd film when analyzed with an ounce of logic. Why exactly do we love this movie about an abandoned 8-year-old that physically abuses home intruders? Regardless, we watch both these films every year. They both bring us Christmas cheer whether we are hate watching or love watching. Merry Christmas! Listen now! 3

Just when you think things can't get nay more bleak... they do! Yes, we have more unfortunate news. Sadly, we have lost yet another Hollywood icon with the passing of Rob Reiner. Also, to add insult to injury, he was allegedly stabbed to death by his own son alongside his wife. It's not exactly the type of surprise we like to receive during the holidays, but here we are. Pour one out for Rob Reiner by rewatching Misery (1990). Next up is not much more uplifting, Diddy: The Reckoning! The new doc series all about Diddy on Netflix really captures who Puff Daddy really is... a desperate wannabe! After that, I recap another Netflix program called The Beast In Me which stars Claire Danes. Was anyone else confusing her with Aileen Wuornos while watching this? Finally, I give my harsh critique on both the book and the new film adaptation of The Housemaid (2025). Is it too much to ask that a twisted suburban psychological thriller just be a little more flamboyant?! So many missed opportunities. Oh, and I also tell a story about how my best friend gaslit me into a fit of delirium. Listen now! 3

Nothing says Christmas like forbidden sapphic love in the 1950s! Well, at least thats how I feel. Tune into this special Holiday episode where me and my cinephile bestie, Marcus Cole (@marcus_t_cole), unpack Carol (2015) and *National Lampoon's* Christmas Vacation (1989). Sure, some may argue that the former is not a proper Christmas film, but it takes place around Christmas, so that's all it takes for me to label it a holiday classic. By the way, would you order poached eggs over creamed spinach with a dry martini for an early lunch while simultaneously chain smoking cigarettes? Carol certainly would! After chatting about queer prejudice for awhile we begin to discuss Christmas Vacation (1989). A film that highlights Chevy Chase's physical comedy strengths, despite him being a total a$$hole IRL. Also, do you think Todd and Margo had exciting s€x? We vote: absolutely not. Listen now! 3

Do I need God and religion? No! Why would I when I have Heated Rivalry?! Yes, I'm back again talking about the best show of all time that centers around secretive gay hockey romance. Also, congrats to us on the recent news that the show has been renewed for a second season! We really cannot get enough of the hockey butts. In addition to the new Heated Rivalry, I cannot help but comment on the latest episodes of All's Fair. Specifically, the wildly raunchy scene in which Sarah Paulson lets a fireman penetrate her "emergency exit" with his big hose... their words, not mine. Next up is some semi-scandalous fashion news about how Dario Vitale is already out at Versace after one bombshell collection. Im not sure which is gayer: Heated Rivalry or Dario's singular 80s Miami Gigolo collection that dropped earlier this year. Google it. Then I get into the new trailer for Mother Mary (2026). It's one of 200 movies that Anne Hathaway will be starring in this coming year, and it looks like it has potential! Lastly, for my EPCOT segment, I discuss the haunting experience of being face with your own Spotify wrapped. Listen now! 3

I have been changed FOR GOOD... after watching two bubble butt hockey players immerse themselves in a secret s€x partnership! The new erotic series, Heated Rivalry, has not only taken over the internet, but also my twisted mind. Who knew that closeted gay (bi?) men on ice are exactly what I need to calm my nerves on a Friday night. Before I get into all that, I first address a different queer act of fellatio... Trump blew Bubba! Just when you think the world is as weird as it can get, things get all the more bizarre. Then of course I do a deep dive on the global impact of Wicked: For Good and it's kooky press tour. Also, did you know that if you flip Madame Morrible's initials "MM" upside down to "WW" you get Wicked Witch?! Wild! Finally, the EPCOT this week is all about a dowdy Karen that practically hijacked my flight back to LA. Listen now! 3

When all else fails - return to your hometown and attempt to homewreck your ex's marriage in a delusional ploy to win him back! That's right, this episode me and my s€xsi friend Brent Tarnol (@tomahawktarnol) are recapping two underrated gems. The first being Young Adult (2011). Despite Charlize Theron's character, Mavis Gary, being a horrible person in this film, we still somehow aspire to be like this self-destructive queen. The third act of this film is not only something I'll remember forever, but I will mentally replay it in the shower after a particularly stressful evening. The next movie we get into is Clifford (1994) which contains an unmatched performance by the great Martin Short. Martin's convincing portrayal of a 10-year-old monster child is something that the Academy most definitely overlooked. Also, for God's sake, why didn't they just let poor Clifford go to Dinosaur World in the first place and avoid all the mess?! Sometimes you just need to let a boy have fun. Listen now! 3

Seeing Timothée's Vogue cover felt like someone threw acid in my eyes! Well, maybe not that bad, but still pretty terrible! Listen to me tear apart this magazine travesty and explain exactly why this cover is so flawed. Then I move onto some different fashion news by discussing the new teaser trailer for The Devil Wears Prada 2 (2026). The trailer is almost perfect, but with one MAJOR mistake. In what world would Miranda f**king Priestly be wearing these dated Valentino pumps? Such a faux pas. Then I give my review on the new Lynne Ramsay flick starring Jennifer Lawrence, Die My Love (2025). If postpartum can really make a b!tch this crazy, it's no wonder some mothers become Karens! Lastly, I talk about the new show on HBO Max, I Love LA. I do love LA myself, but unclear if I really love this show just yet. I'm hopeful it improves! I also share a harrowing tale about me and a friend's vehicular whoopsie at Palm Springs pride last weekend. Listen now! 3

Kim Kardashian is going to win an Emmy! All's Fair is the best legal drama series in the history of television!!! Just kidding. The show is kind of awful. That said, I loved it and I plan to watch it for as long as it gets renewed. However, before I get into that Ryan Murphy mess, I recap halloween and the costumes I hated the most. After that, I dive into my new favorite album by my favorite English pop star, Lily Allen (who I actually totally forgot about until the album dropped several weeks ago). These songs are fire! Miss Lily does not hold back on exposing her trifling ex-hubby. Next, I can't help but touch on Britney Spears and the recent drama surrounding her ex. Can someone read K-Fed's memoir for me? I refuse to financially contribute to that (but I am curious). Lastly, hear about my new amputee fetish and the reality star husband that inspired it! Listen now 3

Katy Perry is already connected to love... Again! I kick off this week's episode with the hard launch between Katy and the s€xsi Canadian politician, Justin Trudeau. Maybe our pop girlie will try her hand at politics next! After discussing that news, I move onto even more confusing topics like Vogue World. WTF even is Vogue World? Well, apparently it consists of Nicole Kidman in Gilda (1946) cosplay and Gabbriette looking very hot. After I talk about other (better) ideas Vogue should be pursuing, I get side tracked and start going on about Megan Fox's recent appearance at a screening of Jennifer's Body (2009). What are your thoughts on Megan's getup to the event? Then I get back on track and dive into my new favorite collab between Emma Stone and Yorgos Lanthimos, Bugonia (2025). Conspiracy theories are lit! Lastly, I tell a very juicy story in my final EPCOT segment about a middle-aged esthetician and a cheating male pop star. Listen now! 3 NICOLE KIDMAN AT VOGUE WORLD GABBRIETTE AT VOGUE WORLD