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In this episode, we're talking about that awful feeling that your anxious attachment is going to push someone away, and what happens when you're so afraid of being "too much" that you start making yourself smaller. Because there's a difference between having needs, experiencing relationship anxiety, and letting your fear decide how you show up in love. And babe, you don't have to become the world's chillest, lowest-maintenance girlfriend to have a secure relationship. 🫶🏽 Not sure if it's your anxiety or something actually wrong in your relationship? I made you a 2-minute quiz to help you start figuring that out. Take it here: https://secure-love-quiz.vercel.app 💗

You know that feeling when your partner takes a little longer to text back, seems slightly less affectionate, or doesn't send the usual goodnight emoji and suddenly your brain is screaming SOMETHING IS WRONG?! 😭 Babe. I've BEEN there. In this episode, we're talking about what to do when your partner feels distant, why even perfectly normal space can feel like rejection when you have anxious attachment, and how our desperate attempts to feel closer can actually push connection further away. I'm sharing what dating my husband Craig taught me about navigating distance, why trying to keep every text conversation going isn't necessarily creating intimacy, and the difference between being proactive in your relationship and straight-up micromanaging it. 🙃 Because here's the thing: Zero distance isn't intimacy. And giving someone space isn't the same as playing hard to get. You don't need to pretend you don't care, ignore their texts, or become the world's chillest girlfriend. But you CAN learn to stop treating every little bit of distance like a five-alarm relationship emergency. Sometimes your relationship doesn't need fixing. It just needs a little room to BREATHE. 🫶🏽 💗 Ready to stop spiraling every time your relationship feels a little off? Learn more about Secure Love Lab: https://www.healinggirlgang.com/sll

Have you ever worried that you're just... TOO MUCH in your relationship? 😭 Too needy. Too sensitive. Too emotional. Too many questions. Too much reassurance. Meanwhile, you're a fully functioning, independent, successful woman in literally every other area of your life. MAKE IT MAKE SENSE. In this episode, we're talking about that awful feeling that your anxious attachment is going to push someone away, and what happens when you're so afraid of being "too much" that you start making yourself smaller. Because there's a difference between having needs, experiencing relationship anxiety, and letting your fear decide how you show up in love. And babe, you don't have to become the world's chillest, lowest-maintenance girlfriend to have a secure relationship. 🫶🏽 Not sure if it's your anxiety or something actually wrong in your relationship? I made you a 2-minute quiz to help you start figuring that out. Take it here: https://secure-love-quiz.vercel.app  ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ SECURE LOVE LAB   FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

You rearrange your schedule. Keep your weekends open. Make sure there’s time to see them. And somehow you’re STILL sitting there thinking… why don’t I feel like a priority?! 😭 In this episode, we’re talking about what can actually be happening when you feel unimportant or unchosen in your relationship, even when your partner is kind, considerate, and showing up for you. Because sometimes the problem isn’t that they stopped prioritizing you. It’s that somewhere along the way, you stopped prioritizing yourself. I’m getting into why anxious attachment can make us completely merge with our relationships, the “cool chill girlfriend” trap, why knowing you self-abandon isn’t the same as knowing how to STOP doing it when the stakes feel high, and what my own relationship with Craig taught me about keeping your own damn life. Because secure attachment isn’t caring less about your relationship. It’s realizing you don’t have to abandon yourself to feel chosen by someone else. 🫶🏽 ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ SECURE LOVE LAB   FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

You know when your partner has told you they love you, shown you they love you, and your anxious attachment is STILL like... okay but can you tell me again? 😭 In this episode, we’re talking about why you crave constant reassurance in your relationship and why trying to force yourself to “stop being needy” doesn’t actually solve what’s happening underneath. I’m breaking down why reassurance can start to feel like a caffeine tolerance, the difference between wanting reassurance and needing proof, and how learning to sit with discomfort and trust yourself can help you move toward secure attachment. Plus, I’m answering: “My partner says I ask for reassurance too much and it’s pushing them away. I know it’s a problem, but I can’t stop. What do I do?” Because secure attachment isn’t never wanting reassurance again. It’s being able to receive the love that’s already there without needing them to prove it to you 15 more times. 🫶🏽   ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ https://www.healinggirlgang.com/sll ✅ SUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlsubscribe      JOIN THE HEALING JOURNEY 💗Follow on Instagram: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlinsta 💖Follow on TikTok: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirltiktok WORK WITH CLARE ⭐️ VIP 1:1 Session https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlVIP

You’ve read the books. Saved the posts. You KNOW you have anxious attachment. So why are you still overthinking everything?! 😭 In this episode, we’re talking about the frustrating gap between knowing your patterns and actually changing them. Because being wildly self-aware doesn’t necessarily stop you from analyzing the text, replaying the conversation, or wondering if something is wrong. At some point, we have to stop becoming experts in why we spiral and start changing what happens when we do. If you’re a high-achieving, self-aware girlie who is very tired of knowing better and still doing the thing... hiiiii. This one’s for you. 🫶🏽 ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ SECURE LOVE LAB   FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

In this episode, I’m sharing the 3 things I learned to tell myself when my anxious attachment was triggered that helped me stop turning one tiny vibe shift into an entire relationship spiral. We’re talking about why you can’t out-logic your nervous system, why what feels hysteric can be historic, and the BIG one: urgency does not equal truth. I’m also answering a listener question about catching feelings during the talking stage and how to stop anxiety from rushing you into treating someone like a committed partner before you actually know them. Because the goal isn’t to never get triggered. It’s learning how to feel the trigger without letting it write the entire story. 🫶🏽 ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ https://www.healinggirlgang.com/sll ✅ SUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlsubscribe      JOIN THE HEALING JOURNEY 💗Follow on Instagram: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlinsta 💖Follow on TikTok: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirltiktok WORK WITH CLARE ⭐️ VIP 1:1 Session https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlVIP

You know that feeling when they haven't texted back and suddenly your brain is doing A Beautiful Mind level calculations trying to figure out what it means? 😭 They told you they have a busy day. They've consistently shown you they care. You KNOW logically that nothing is wrong. But your anxious attachment is like... okay but why are they being quiet??? In this episode of the Be That Healing Girl Podcast, we're talking about why your partner's silence can feel SO freaking unbearable when you have anxious attachment, and why a delayed text, a little distance, or them needing space can suddenly feel like proof that they're pulling away. Because the problem usually isn't actually the silence. It's what your internal system has learned to make the silence mean. For me, silence used to mean: You're alone. No one's coming. Figure it out yourself. And no amount of telling myself, “Craig is probably just busy” could make that feeling disappear. Inside this episode, we're getting into: ✨ Why your partner not texting back can trigger an anxious attachment spiral ✨ Why you can be wildly confident at work and completely unravel in your relationship ✨ The “girl math” we do with response times when we're looking for reassurance ✨ Why your brain starts hunting for evidence that they're pulling away ✨ How people pleasing and overfunctioning can become ways of trying to earn safety in love ✨ Why “just communicate” isn't always the answer ✨ Why reassurance can feel amazing... until they go quiet again ✨ The childhood experience that helped me understand why silence felt so threatening to me ✨ My motion-sensor-light analogy for understanding relationship anxiety ✨ What secure attachment actually looks like when your partner needs space I also answer a question from inside Secure Love Lab: “Every time they need space, I immediately assume they're pulling away for good. How do I know if it's real?” Because secure attachment doesn't mean your partner never goes quiet. It means their silence doesn't automatically become a story about your worth, their feelings, or the future of your relationship. And THAT is what we're working toward. If you're a high-achieving woman who can run the meeting, manage the team, make the diagnosis, close the deal... but one unanswered text has you wondering if the relationship is over, hiiiii babe. This one's for you. 😂 🎧 Subscribe to the Be That Healing Girl Podcast for more on anxious attachment, relationship anxiety, overthinking, secure attachment, emotional safety, and learning how to actually relax into a healthy relationship. ✨ Is this my anxiety or is something actually wrong? Quiz coming soon! #AnxiousAttachment #RelationshipAnxiety #Overthinking #SecureAttachment #AttachmentStyles #RelationshipAdvice #TextingAnxiety #FearOfAbandonment #HealthyRelationships #BeThatHealingGirl

Ever have one of those weekends where everything was amazing... and then Sunday rolls around and suddenly your brain is convinced something is wrong? Yeah. I know that spiral. Your partner is kind. They're consistent. Their words match their actions. They've given you absolutely no reason to question the relationship. ...and somehow your brain is still waiting for the other shoe to drop. In this week's episode, I'm unpacking why we create problems when there aren't any, why healthy relationships can actually feel harder for anxious attachment, and the hidden habits that quietly fuel your spirals long before they explode. Because here's the thing: Your spiral didn't come out of nowhere. It was building long before the overthinking started. In this episode, we talk about: ✨ Why you create conflict when your relationship is actually going well ✨ The invisible habits quietly fueling your anxious attachment ✨ Why reassurance isn't the thing you're actually looking for ✨ The surprising reason healthy relationships can feel uncomfortable ✨ Why "just stop overthinking" has never worked ✨ How to build real emotional safety instead of white-knuckling your way through a good relationship ✨ The phone battery analogy that completely changed how I think about spirals ✨ A client story about finally letting herself receive love instead of always earning it One of the biggest lessons I've learned is that anxious attachment doesn't just show up when something is wrong. Sometimes it shows up because everything is finally right. And if you've ever found yourself picking fights after a great weekend, questioning a genuinely good partner, or wondering why you can't just relax... I made this episode for you. 💛 Ready to stop overthinking and start feeling secure? The Secure Love Lab is my 6-month coaching experience for high-achieving women who are exhausted from relationship anxiety, overthinking every text, and waiting for the other shoe to drop. If you're ready to stop understanding your patterns and finally start changing them, I'd love to support you.

Ever feel like your partner gets quiet and suddenly your entire nervous system decides the relationship is ending? Yep. Been there. In this episode, I'm sharing one of the biggest shifts that helped me stop spiraling every time I thought something felt "off" in my relationship. If you're a high achiever who can solve problems at work all day long but finds yourself replaying texts, analyzing their tone, or convincing yourself they're pulling away, this episode is for you. We're talking about why your brain keeps trying to "logic" its way out of relationship anxiety, why reassurance only works temporarily, and the emotional skill that actually creates lasting security. Inside this episode: ✨ Why your partner feeling distant can hijack your entire day ✨ The hidden pattern that keeps anxious attachment alive ✨ Why overthinking and reassurance are keeping you stuck ✨ The mistake high achievers make when anxiety shows up ✨ How to build real emotional safety instead of chasing temporary relief If you've ever caught yourself wondering, "Are they mad at me?" or convinced yourself the relationship was over because they took longer to text back, I promise you're not alone. Hit subscribe for weekly episodes on anxious attachment, relationship anxiety, emotional regulation, and building secure, healthy relationships. 💛 If this episode helped you, I'd love if you left a 5-star review. It helps me keep this podcast free and helps more people find the support they need.   ✨🧪💚 GET EARLY ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ SECURE LOVE LAB   FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

Hey Girlies! It's your girl Clare back at it with another episode of the BeThatHealingGirl Podcast where we're diving into the real and sometimes messy parts of our love lives. 🌟 This week is all about self-sabotage. Yep, been there, sabotaged that... especially with those sweet, secure types who just wanted to love us, right? Wondering why things seem to implode just when they're getting good? Girl, you're not alone, and this episode is here to unpack all of that mess with you. We're talking about the signs, the whys, and how to finally stop self-sabotaging our love lives. 🚫💔 Whether you're the queen of 'big city moves' but can't seem to hold down a city boy, or you're married and picking fights over who left the cap off the toothpaste...this chat is for you. Plus, I'm sharing some super personal stories and client experiences that'll make you say, "Omg, that's totally me!" Ready to kick those bad habits and start owning your love story? Press play, and let's get into it! And hey, if you love what you hear, don't forget to hit that subscribe button 🎧✨ #SelfSabotage #RelationshipAdvice #LoveLife #HealingJourney #PodcastLife #GirlTalk #RealTalk #empowerment   ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ https://www.healinggirlgang.com/sll   ✅ SUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlsubscribe        JOIN THE HEALING JOURNEY 💗Follow on Instagram: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlinsta 💖Follow on TikTok: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirltiktok   WORK WITH CLARE ⭐️ VIP 1:1 Session https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlVIP

Have you ever been convinced something was wrong in your relationship... only to realize later your brain completely made it up? Maybe they took longer to text back. Maybe they seemed quieter than usual. Maybe one tiny moment turned into a full-blown story that had you convinced they were losing interest, pulling away... or worse. If you've ever felt trapped in those spirals, this episode is for you. In this episode of the Be That Healing Girl Podcast, I'm sharing one of the most personal stories I've ever told. During a solo wilderness retreat, my anxious brain convinced me—with absolutely zero evidence—that my husband was having an affair. It felt completely real... until I was finally able to watch my mind create the story in real time. We dive into why anxious attachment doesn't just react to reality—it often fills in the blanks, creating stories that feel true even when they aren't. In this episode, we cover: ✨ Why your anxious brain creates fake relationship scenarios ✨ The difference between intuition and anxiety ✨ Why your brain always assumes the worst ✨ How anxious attachment turns uncertainty into "proof" ✨ Why distraction isn't the same as healing ✨ The fear loop that keeps reinforcing relationship anxiety ✨ How to recognize when you're reacting to a story instead of reality ✨ The first step toward breaking the cycle If you're a high-achieving woman who's exhausted from overthinking every text, replaying conversations, or waiting for the other shoe to drop—even in a healthy relationship—this episode will help you understand what's really happening beneath the surface. 💚 Want to stop living in false alarms and finally feel safe in love? Check out the Secure Love Lab, my coaching program designed to help you break free from anxious attachment, stop spiraling, and build lasting emotional security.   ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ https://www.healinggirlgang.com/sll   ✅ SUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlsubscribe        JOIN THE HEALING JOURNEY 💗Follow on Instagram: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlinsta 💖Follow on TikTok: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirltiktok   WORK WITH CLARE ⭐️ VIP 1:1 Session https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlVIP

Hey Girlies! It's your girl Clare back at it with another episode of the BeThatHEalingGirl Podcast where we're diving into the real and sometimes messy parts of our love lives. 🌟 This week is all about self-sabotage. Yep, been there, sabotaged that especially with those sweet, secure types who just wanted to love us, right? Wondering why things seem to implode just when they're getting good? Girl, you're not alone, and this episode is here to unpack all of that mess with you. We're talking about the signs, the whys, and how to finally stop self-sabotaging our love lives. 🚫💔 Whether you're the queen of 'big city moves' but can't seem to hold down a city boy, or you're married and picking fights over who left the cap off the toothpaste - this chat is for you. Plus, I'm sharing some super personal stories and client experiences that'll make you say, "Omg, that's totally me!" Ready to kick those bad habits and start owning your love story? Press play, and let's get into it! And hey, if you love what you hear, don't forget to hit that subscribe button 🎧✨ #SelfSabotage #RelationshipAdvice #LoveLife #HealingJourney #PodcastLife #GirlTalk #RealTalk #empowerment   ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ https://www.healinggirlgang.com/sll   ✅ SUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlsubscribe        JOIN THE HEALING JOURNEY 💗Follow on Instagram: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlinsta 💖Follow on TikTok: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirltiktok   WORK WITH CLARE ⭐️ VIP 1:1 Session https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlVIP

In this week's episode, I'm unpacking why reassurance never seems to stick and why asking for more isn't actually the thing that's going to make you feel safe. One of the biggest mindset shifts I ever had was realizing I wasn't really asking: "Do you love me?" I was asking: "Am I safe?" And those are two completely different questions. We get into: ✨ Why reassurance feels good... for about five minutes ✨ The anxious attachment loop that keeps resetting itself ✨ Why your partner can't fix something that isn't actually coming from them ✨ The difference between communicating your needs and chasing reassurance ✨ How to build the kind of internal safety that doesn't disappear every time they take three hours to text back If you've ever felt embarrassed by how much reassurance you need or wondered why you can absolutely crush it at work but completely unravel over one delayed text... this episode is for you. And if you're tired of understanding your patterns but still feeling trapped by them... I have something coming that's built exactly for that. 🎧 Let's get into it!   ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ https://www.healinggirlgang.com/sll   ✅ SUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlsubscribe        JOIN THE HEALING JOURNEY 💗Follow on Instagram: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlinsta 💖Follow on TikTok: https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirltiktok   WORK WITH CLARE ⭐️ VIP 1:1 Session https://bit.ly/bethathealinggirlVIP

If you've ever felt like you're pushing a good person away because of your anxiety, or if you're caught in the same argument cycle every few weeks, this episode is a must-listen for you. Whether you're dating, in a relationship, or even married and finding those anxious triggers popping up, I'm here to guide you through it. 💖 In today's episode, I get real about my own journey with anxious attachment, share insights on how these symptoms can sabotage a good thing, and offer strategies to not only stop pushing your partner away but to actually bring them closer. Plus, don't miss the hot tip at the end where I reveal the internal shift that changed everything for me!!! 🔍 Inside This Episode: - Personal anecdotes and lessons learned from my own relationship struggles 📚 - Understanding the impact of anxiously attached symptoms on your love life 💔 - Strategies to manage triggers and avoid pushing your partner away 🛑 - A transformative hot tip that will help you bring your partner closer instead of driving them away 🔥 If you're a high-achieving, overthinking girly who's slaying in every area of your life except romantically, then you're in the perfect spot. Let's navigate these choppy waters together and turn your relationship anxiety into a source of strength. #BeThatHealingGirl #AnxiousAttachment #RelationshipAnxiety #LoveHealing #PodcastLove ✨🧪💚 GET ACCESS TO THE SECURE LOVE LAB 🧪💚✨ SECURE LOVE LAB   FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session