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When someone you love is struggling with addiction, it may feel like there's often not much room left for you. In this episode, Amber Hollingsworth, founder of the YouTube channel Put The Shovel Down, opens up about growing up as the responsible sibling in an addicted family. She shares what it was like to pay her older half-sister's bills for years, why she dreaded seeing an unknown number on her phone, and the moment she finally said no. We talk about: "Guilt-sment": feeling guilty and resentful at the same time Why siblings are often the last to forgive, and what forgiveness really means Amber's simple test for helping vs. enabling Why boundaries are rules for yourself, not ultimatums for your sibling What parents can do for the child who seems fine If you've ever felt like you had to hold it all together while your brother or sister was in crisis, this one is for you. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok Guest speaker: Amber Hollingsworth Watch Amber's channel: Put the Shovel Down

At 16, when most teens are trying to figure out high school, friendships, and who they want to become, Azlyn became convinced it was her job to help save her brother who was struggling with addiction. She covered for him. Kept tabs on him. Tried to protect him from consequences. Tried to protect her family. And when he went to rehab, she struggled with the idea of letting go of the role she had spent years playing. But recovery wasn’t linear. Neither was relapse. And neither was Azlyn’s own journey of figuring out how to love her brother without losing herself in the process. In this episode, Azlyn joins me to talk candidly about growing up alongside her brother’s addiction, the guilt and responsibility she carried as a young sibling, what relapse looked like from her side, and what she’s still learning about boundaries, self-care, and showing up for herself. Because Azlyn doesn’t have it all figured out—and that’s kind of the point. Sometimes, healing means learning that you can love someone deeply without being responsible for what happens to them. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Azlyn Belisle, younger sibling to a brother in recovery

Drug tests. Revolving doors of rehabs. On and off the street. Judges, and parole officers — to families waiting and hoping for something to change. When a loved one’s treatment is dictated by external forces, why doesn’t it “work”, and what does it look like when it does? Dr. Sheila Vakharia — researcher, social worker, and author of The Harm Reduction Gap — has worked inside outpatient treatment centers, drug courts, and needle exchange programs, giving her a rare, ground-level view of what actually helps people survive addiction, what gets in the way, and the power families have. Together we dig into: Why addiction is the only health condition where people are expected to be "cured" before treatment even starts The stigma around methadone and buprenorphine — and why they're not "trading one drug for another" How the criminal legal system can be both a lifeline and a barrier to real care Why courts, insurance gaps, and fear-based messaging keep failing families What families can actually do — from local pharmacy advocacy to sharing your story with lawmakers and media 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Dr. Sheila Vakharia, author and Deputy Director of the Department of Research and Academic Engagement at the Drug Policy Alliance  Episode resources: Sheila’s book: The Harm Reduction Gap: Helping Individuals Left Behind by Conventional Drug Prevention and Abstinence-Only Treatment Read how you can advocate for your loved one: One parent’s story

When someone you love is struggling with addiction, it's easy to feel like you only have two options: fix it or walk away. But there's a third path—and it starts with understanding that while you can't force recovery, you're not powerless either. In this episode, I'm joined by Pam Lanhart, founder and executive director of Thrive Family Recovery Resources, a nonprofit supporting families affected by substance use and addiction. Pam is the daughter, sister, and mother of loved ones who have struggled with addiction, and after losing her son Jake, she's dedicated her life to helping families create the conditions for lasting recovery through compassionate, evidence-based approaches. Together, we discuss: Why "tough love" often creates more chaos than changeWhat CRAFT and Invitation to Change are—and how families can use themThe role shame plays in relapse, especially during family visitsHow to set firm boundaries without damaging the relationshipWhat ambivalence really means—and why it isn't the same as not wanting recoveryThe neuroscience behind behavior change and building new neural pathwaysPractical ways to respond during moments of crisis without becoming the fixer or crisis managerWhether you're a parent, sibling, partner, or friend, this conversation will help you better understand addiction recovery, communicate more effectively, and support your loved one without losing yourself in the process. If you've ever felt like you were failing someone you love, this episode is for you. You're not powerless—and you don't have to navigate family recovery alone. 📘 Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝 Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲 Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙 Guest speaker: Pam Lanhart, founder and executive director of Thrive Family Recovery Resources Episode resources: Join Thrive’s Family Support Facebook Group About the Invitation to Change (ITC) method About CRAFT

When one child is struggling with addiction, the fear and focus can consume everything — but what happens to the other kids in the house, the siblings who are angry, the ones who seem fine but aren't? In this episode, Kathleen Cochran, a mother and founder of Moms For All Paths to Recovery talks about one of the hardest and least-discussed realities of family addiction: how do you show up for all of your children when one of them is in crisis? Kathleen speaks honestly about the impossible triage of parenting under pressure — protecting one child while not losing another, supporting the siblings who are angry, grieving, or quietly holding everything together, and recognizing the weight carried by the child who always seemed fine. She also opens up about the guilt that comes with realizing you unintentionally forced your other children to grow up too soon and carry the burden of being the parentified child. This episode is for parents in the thick of trying to save their child but realize their other children need their support too, and parents who are ready to rebuild their relationship with their kids. 📘 Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Kathleen Cochran, founder of "Moms for All Paths to Recovery" Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsforallpaths/  Join our live discussion on July 1st at 4pm EST / 7pm PST  Learn about how Narcan (Naloxone) saves lives: https://www.cdc.gov/opioids/naloxone.html

Is Al-Anon and 12-Step the best approach for families navigating their loved one’s addiction? The pressure to issue ultimatums or cut them off entirely can feel like the only path forward. But what if the advice you've been given is outdated, incomplete, not for you, or just wrong? In this episode, Jane Mackey, CEO and founder of We The Village and certified family coach, challenges what families are told about loving someone through addiction, and how to move beyond the 12-step approach used in Al-Anon and Nar-Anon.  Jane found CRAFT (Community Reinforcement and Family Training) after desperately searching for real tools to help someone she loved, and has since built an accessible family coaching program around it. Together, we get into: Why "tough love" and "rock bottom" became the default, and where they actually fall short The enabling myth: how to tell the difference between hurting and helping How to respond to their substance use without losing control Why cutting someone off makes it harder for them to get help and can reduce your influence over their recovery Whether CRAFT and 12-step can coexist, or if they're fundamentally at odds How families report feeling less anxious and depressed through CRAFT — even when their loved one never gets help If you've ever felt like you're choosing between abandoning someone you love and losing yourself entirely, this episode is for you. We The Village is offering listeners 20% off their programs — use code FLOR at wethevillage.co 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Jane Macky, founder and CEO of We The Village

This episode is for anyone navigating a sibling's addiction, early sobriety, or the complicated road of family recovery. A year ago, I wasn't sure where my brother Justin would be today — or if he'd make it to his 21st birthday. This episode, releasing in honor of National Sibling Day (April 10th), is one I've been waiting to record for a long time. Justin is 21, one year sober, and six months into a long-term young adult treatment program — and for the first time, he's sharing his story of addiction and early sobriety in his own words. We recorded this together during a family visit upstate, and what came out of it was more honest, more raw, and more hopeful than I could have scripted. We talk about: What the past year of young adult addiction recovery has actually looked like — the hard parts and the proud onesHow drug addiction shaped his relationships, his sense of self, and what friendship even meansThe loneliness and shame in early sobriety that don't get talked about enoughWhat he wishes people understood about addiction before judging someone going through it 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Justin Dajer Related content: Episode: My brother’s addiction: Learning how to be his sister—not mom

Addiction is hard. But the stories we tell about it can make it even harder. When someone you love is struggling with substance use, the questions feel endless:  Do they deserve my love right now? Am I enabling them? Should I cut them off? In this episode, we unpack one of the most dangerous parts of addiction — the narrative around it. Because sometimes what harms our loved ones isn’t just the substances. It’s the shame. The labels. The fear-driven decisions. The belief that love must be earned. In this episode with Joseph Green, a person in recovery and spoken word artist, we explore 5 powerful mindset shifts that can change how you show up: Moving from “deserving” to inherent worth Treating addiction as a mental health condition — not a moral failue Reframing “enabling” vs. compassionate care and harm reduction Rethinking cutting someone off vs. being there when they’re ready Choosing people-first language over labels like “junkie” or “addict” If you’ve ever felt torn between protecting yourself and loving someone through addiction, this conversation will challenge you to look at the story you’re telling — about them and about yourself. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Joseph Green Related content: About LMS Voice: https://lmsvoice.com/productions/ Start WIth Hope stories: https://startwithhope.com/stories-of-hope Take the Stories of Hope course and own your story: https://ncmwpic.learnupon.com/store/4553158-stories-of-hope-a-value-centered-approach-to-storytelling

If your sibling is sober, or you’ve finally put those boundaries up, but you still feel on edge, you’re not alone. Many siblings experience lingering anxiety after addiction—even when life finally feels calm. The chaos may be gone, but your body hasn’t caught up. In this episode, Shahem McLaurin digs into what happens after the crisis phase ends: why your nervous system stays on high alert, how years of unpredictability create hypervigilance, and why “nothing happening” can feel unsafe. We also explore boundaries, trust, and learning to feel safe again in recovery—at your own pace. This conversation is for siblings who are tired of waiting for the other shoe to drop and want language for what they’re feeling. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Shahem Mclaurin Related content: Book: “It Didn’t Start With You” by Mark Wolynn

What does it mean to grieve a parent who is still alive—but was never able to show up the way you needed? In this episode, Marci Hopkins shares how childhood abuse, emotional neglect, and a parent’s addiction quietly shaped her relationship with alcohol—and how drinking became a way to survive grief she didn’t yet have language for. For years, Marci’s drinking didn’t look extreme or chaotic. It looked normal. It looked functional. It looked like coping. As many people enter Dry January questioning their own relationship with alcohol, this conversation offers a deeper lens—one that moves beyond willpower or labels and into the emotional roots of why we drink. We talk about: How alcohol can become a socially acceptable way to numb unresolved traumaGrieving the parent you needed, not just the one you hadWhy addiction often masks deeper grief and unmet childhood needsLetting go of the hope that someone will one day become who you needed them to beFinding peace and sobriety without the closure you thought you’d need This episode is for anyone who has loved someone struggling with addiction, questioned their own drinking, or felt the quiet, complicated grief of losing someone—while they’re still alive. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Marci Hopkins Related content: Marci’s book: “Chaos to Clarity: Seeing the Signs and Breaking the Cycles”Family resources: Shatterproof Find a family group: Al-Anon Family Groups

What if everything you’ve been taught about recovery is wrong? What if the thing your family fears —medication—might actually be the one thing that could help save your loved one’s life? You might recognize names like methadone, suboxone, sublocade, buprenorphine, and others. In this episode, we strip away the sugarcoating and talk honestly about how these work, and what exactly medically assisted treatment (MAT) is: what it does, why it works, and why so many families still judge it. We dig into the hard truths—how detox alone sets people up to fail, how shame keeps loved ones stuck, and how MAT creates the chemical stability that recovery literally cannot happen without. We confront the biggest stigma head-on: “Isn’t this just swapping one drug for another?” And we break down, in real language, why that belief is not only outdated—but dangerous. If you’re a sibling or family member watching someone you love fight addiction, this episode gives you the clarity you’ve been craving and the honesty you deserve. You’ll walk away with: The real science behind MAT and why it stabilizes the brain when nothing else doesA breakdown of the biggest stigmas, including why the “one drug for another” myth does more harm than goodWhat recovery actually requires beyond detox, tough love, or willpowerClear ways to support your loved one without shame, judgment, or outdated beliefs 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Dr. Sarah Nasir, DO Related content: Watch Dr. Nasir break down “Opioid Addiction & 3 Phases of Treatment”Download her Opioid Recovery Guide

“How’s your brother? How are your parents?” Sound familiar? If you’ve ever felt like people are quick to ask about the loved one struggling with substance use—but rarely ask how you’re doing—you’re not alone. Or maybe they jump straight into offering advice. I know that feeling well. In this episode, I’m answering the questions I get asked most about my brother’s addiction—and the ones I wish people asked instead. The ones I hear all the time sound like: “Do you think he’s ready for treatment this time?” “What caused him to use?” “Is your family doing better now?” But those aren’t the questions I wish people asked. Because it’s not about blame—it’s about being seen. This episode is for every sibling who’s tired of being the messenger, the fixer, or the spokesperson. It’s for the ones who want to talk about their relationship with their sibling as they see it—not through the lens of addiction, but through love, boundaries, and truth. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok

What does it really mean to love someone through addiction — and how do we move beyond the idea that rehab is the only way forward? The answer is rarely simple. We want to show up, to help, to protect — but sometimes our love feels heavy, confusing, or not enough. Joanna and I talk about the complicated love of siblings — the guilt, the hope, the heartbreak — and how stories like hers and mine can remind us that none of us are alone in this. In The Opioid Trilogy, Joanna brings these stories to life with unflinching honesty: Brother captures her intimate phone calls with her brother as he navigates the fragile cycle of recovery; Do No Harm follows Raina McMahan’s 17-year struggle with heroin and the healing power of connection over punishment; and Coming Home traces Tahira Malik’s journey of rebuilding after addiction and incarceration, and her creation of a safe space for women reentering society. Together we dig into: The complicated love of siblings — the guilt, the hope, the heartbreak Paths to recovery beyond rehab The failures of the rehab industry How to help and support a loved one in early recovery, or sober curious And what it means to love someone through addiction, even when you don’t have the answers If you’ve ever wrestled with the idea of tough love, or questioned, “Am I loving them the right way?” this conversation is for you. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Joanna Rudnick Watch The Opioid Trilogy’s short films: Ep 1: Brother Ep 2:  Do No Harm Ep 3: Coming Home “Rat Park,” explained: TED Talk: “Everything you know about addiction is wrong” by Johann Hari

What happens to the child who’s always told to “be good” while all the attention goes to their sibling? They grow up invisible. They become the Glass Child. In the third and final episode of our Parentification Series, I talk with TEDx speaker Alicia Meneses Maples, who coined the term glass child, about what it’s really like to be the sibling who carries the burden quietly. We go deep into: The crushing pressure of being “the good kid” Parents leaning on you like their therapist The silence and shame of having no space for your own emotions How it all shows up later in toxic relationships and burnout And what healing, boundaries, and acceptance actually look like If you’ve ever felt unseen in your own family, this one will hit home. 📘Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙Guest speaker: Alicia Meneses Maples Related content: Alicia’s TEDx on recognizing the “Glass Child” “The parentified child: Why they’re often the eldest daughter”

What if the version of you that kept your family functioning — the fixer, the peacemaker, the one who never asked for anything — isn't the version you want to be anymore? Psychotherapist Kate Nichols joins Dominique to unpack what it really means to be a cycle breaker when you grew up in a family shaped by addiction. They dig into the guilt that comes with changing, the grief of leaving old roles behind, and the specific challenges siblings face when they decide to stop absorbing everyone else's pain. If you've ever felt responsible for your family's peace — this episode is for you. Topics: breaking generational trauma, cycle breaker, family addiction patterns, people pleasing and addiction, setting boundaries with family, healing from a dysfunctional family. 🎯 This episode will help you: Identify the role you played in your family—and how it’s still shaping youDetermine whether you’re ready to get comfortable with making uncomfortable changes Practical ways to start tuning into what you want and need (instead of what others expect)Discover what free or low-cost mental health tools are available to you 📘 Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey 🤝 Join our FREE and PRIVATE sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery 📲 Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok 🎙 Guest speaker: Kate Nichols, LCSW Related content: “Beyond Blame: Family dynamics 101” “The parentified child: Why they’re often the eldest daughter” Find affordable therapy through OpenPath CollectiveHow to identify if you’re a cyclebreaker