Advertise on podcast: Love Isn't Enough

Just days before their wedding, Joree and John sit down to reflect on how they transformed their insecure attachment - hers anxious, his avoidant - into a secure partnership. They share what it looked like to move from fear and defensiveness to trust and safety, and why the work of healing old wounds is the foundation for a lasting relationship. In this heartfelt conversation, John and Joree open up about what each of them had to face within themselves: John's struggle with shame and defensiveness, Joree's fear of losing independence, and how those patterns used to collide. They also talk about the turning points that transformed their relationship, such as the courage to look inward, the commitment to repair quickly, and the practice of listening without defensiveness. Along the way, they explore the deeper meaning of emotional safety that allows for the ability to be fully seen, to bring anything to your partner without fear of rejection, and to believe in one another's good intentions. You'll also hear a fascinating new finding about early friendships shaping adult attachment, why putting the "us" first (per Terry Real) creates two stronger individuals, and how trust and transparency (including access to each other's phone) becomes a non-issue when safety is real. If you've ever wondered whether anxious/avoidant pairs can become secure, this is your playbook, equal parts science, story, and skills. Connect with Joree & John: •: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this intimate, story-driven episode, Joree and John explore three complementary paths to a good life: pleasure (hedonic happiness), purpose (meaning), and the often-overlooked third path: psychological richness. Drawing on positive psychology research from Dr. Shigehiro Oishi's "Life in Three Dimensions," they unpack how novelty, challenge, and perspective shifts can transform not only your mood, but your worldview. You'll hear the mindset shifts behind their next big leap - relocating to Portugal - and how they moved from what was "pushing" them (escaping comfort and routine) to what was "pulling" them (following intuitive breadcrumbs, synchronicity, and community). They explore further what it means to be stuck on the hedonic treadmill, and how gratitude and savoring can interrupt it; why meaning without balance can narrow your life; and simple ways to diversify your daily experiences so you're changed by the way you choose to live. This episode blends candid storytelling including wrong turns, roundabouts, and serendipity, science-backed tools in areas of mindfulness, values, strengths, and relationship wisdom. If you've been craving more aliveness, adventure, and connection in your life, consider this your invitation to design a psychologically rich one. Connect with Joree & John: •: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this episode of Love Isn't Enough, Joree and John continue sharing the dating advice they followed in their own journey, along with the tips they give their clients on how to find - and maintain - the love you're looking for. While some of this episode is for those dating later in life, and specifically for those who are divorced, much of what they share will apply to anyone in the dating world. They talk about what green flags to look for, how to set up an authentic dating profile, how to not get attached too quickly to someone you just met, ways to ensure safety, and most importantly, being aware of the healing work you need to do prior to getting into a relationship and how to vet out someone to see if they have done their work; this is a key foundation for building a secure attachment. One tricky area for people newly dating is how to talk about sex - if you're sleeping with others, STI's or STD's, and what your boundaries are; these topics can feel especially vulnerable in a new relationship, and yet it's very necessary! Lastly, tune in to hear the #1 thing you need to know about yourself when out in the dating world. If you're ready to attract the partner of your dreams, this episode is for you.   Connect with Joree & John: •: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

Dating after divorce is a whole new game, with real wounds, real wisdom, and (yes) real hope. In this straight-talking, compassionate episode, John and Joree share their own post-divorce dating stories and how they guide their clients: what to put on your dating profile, how to spot genuine interest vs. mixed signals, and why behavior, not words, should guide your choices. They unpack red flags (inconsistency, judgment, defensiveness, love-bombing), safety must-dos, and the mindset shift that turns dating from desperate to discerning. This is Part 1 of a two-part series; next up: green flags, pacing intimacy, consent cues, and building something secure from the start. You'll learn: Profile basics that attract the right matches (cast a narrow, values-aligned net) How to read actions over explanations,and stop giving endless "benefit of the doubt" Safety first: practical ground rules for first meetings 10 common red flags after divorce (and what they look like early) The difference between interest, availability, and readiness Why your top 5 must-haves & 3 deal-breakers protect your peace Want deeper support? Explore our 12-part couples masterclass or therapy options at loveisntenough.net—and catch the video on YouTube. Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

What makes you feel loved might not be what your partner needs to feel loved - and that's where so many couples miss each other. In this playful, practical episode (yes, complete with Joree's giggles and Dr. John's faces 🙃), we revisit Gary Chapman's five love languages - Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, and Gifts - and talk through five powerful additional love languages from Dr. Elizabeth Frederick: Consistency, Nurture, Attunement, Vulnerability, and Foreplay (the all-day kind, not just the 10 minutes before sex). You'll hear real-life examples, how to stop giving what you want and start giving what lands for your partner, and learn simple scripts to ask for love in ways that actually get met. Watch this one on YouTube to see the antics - and stay for the tools that deepen safety, intimacy, and connection. You'll learn: How to identify your top 2 love languages—and your partner's (they likely will differ!) The "positive lens" shift that turns small annoyances into bids for closeness A quick check for consistency (actions > words) that builds everyday trust Gentle, non-defensive scripts to share needs and receive them with grace Why attunement + vulnerability = faster repairs and hotter chemistry Easy, all-day foreplay ideas across emotional, mental, and physical realms If you're ready to give and receive real and authentic love, this episode is for you - and be sure to catch the full video on YouTube. Want to go deeper with us? Visit loveisntenough.net for our 12-part masterclass or to explore couples therapy. Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

Intimacy isn't just physical, it's the courageous act of sharing your inner landscape: the thoughts, feelings, fears, and messy in-between moments most of us keep tucked away. In this candid, funny, and deeply vulnerable episode, John and Joree unpack why so many couples get stuck in transactional chatter (calendars, chores, carpools) and how to shift back into connection through everyday openness and non-defensive listening. They explore what makes intimacy so scary (hi, vulnerability!), how the first 90 seconds of your response shapes long-term safety, and why "two conversations" often work better than one: lead with validation, then explain or share concerns later. You'll hear stories from their work with couples, the power of bearing witness to your partner's life, and practical ways to make sharing easier, including their favorite relationship card decks. The episode ends with a fun and playful twist you won't want to miss; you'll have to hear to believe. You'll learn: What intimacy really is (and isn't) How to replace transactional talk with connection talk A simple "two-conversation" framework to reduce defensiveness The micro-skills that build emotional safety in the first moments Low-pressure tools (card decks, gentle prompts) to spark deeper sharing If you've ever thought, "We talk all the time, so why don't I feel close?" then this episode for you. Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this 3rd episode in our series on attachment styles, Joree and John take attachment theory off the page and into real life, breaking down patterns into tangible examples of how anxious and avoidant patterns play out in the middle of an argument. As we know, arguments in love are never just about the dishes or the eye rolls; they're often old wounds and hidden fears playing out in real time. A very common pattern underneath the dynamics is the anxious partner's fear of abandonment, the avoidant partner's shame and shutdown, and the painful stories of being "too much" or "not enough" that fuel disconnection. With humor, vulnerability, and hard-won lessons from their own relationship, Joree and John unpack how to slow down reactivity, spot the deeper patterns, and ways to practice repair that leads to true secure attachment. This isn't theory — it's the messy, human reality of how fights can either break you apart or bring you closer.   Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

What happens when someone who feels "too much" falls in love with someone who feels "not enough"? For years, that was us - Joree, the anxious partner, and John, the avoidant partner - stuck in the push–pull dance neither of us fully understood. It created disconnection, frustration, and the same repetitive patterns… until we learned what was really going on beneath the surface. In this episode, we take you deeper into the understanding of attachment styles and why they matter; we share what it means to have attachment needs, and how when they are unmet, form attachment wounds and ultimately negative patterns in your relationship. If you've ever wondered why you keep getting stuck, and want to know the best thing you can do to shift into a better connection, this conversation will change the way you see your relationship, and yourself, and ultimately guide you in how to feel safe and secure.   Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this heartfelt and vulnerable joint episode, we share our personal journey of healing from deep-rooted attachment wounds. We open up about the patterns we carried into our relationship—especially the anxious/avoidant dynamic that kept us stuck in cycles of disconnection—and how we consciously did the work to break free from it. Through honest reflection and therapeutic tools, we reveal what it took to stop reacting from old wounds and start relating from a place of safety and trust. We discuss how healing isn't just an individual journey, but a relational one, and why creating a secure attachment—within ourselves and with each other—is the foundation for a thriving partnership. Whether you're in a relationship, seeking one, or doing the inner work to heal your past, this episode offers hope, insight, and practical tools for growing into deeper connection. Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this honest episode, Joree and John share vulnerably (once again - they're always being vulnerable!) how they've been feeling lately. It's been a mixture of grief, sadness and fear about the state of the world, dealing with aging parents, being in physical pain, stress and navigating difficult family dynamics. Without awareness or tools, couples can either deal with these real-life stressors feeling alone in their pain, or even worse, turn their negative emotions onto each other, creating additional stressors for them to face. Luckily that doesn't have to be the case, and Joree and John share many tangible tools that can support couples, but individually and together. Here's a favorite tip: share with your partner where you're at (your mood, energy levels or capacity) so that your partner can depersonalize your mood and do their best to pick up with the if they are able For many more effective strategies, check out this episode, especially if you and your partner are feeling the weight of the world.    Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

On this raw and revealing episode of Love Isn't Enough, Joree opens up about a powerful realization that shook her to the core: she's a high-functioning codependent. Together, John and Joree explore what high-functioning codependency actually looks like—especially in women who seem to have it all together—and how it can quietly erode your sense of peace, boundaries, and self-worth. They dive into Terri Cole's definition of HFCs, how childhood trauma and anxious attachment fuel overgiving, perfectionism, and people-pleasing, and the cost of constantly putting others' needs ahead of your own. With vulnerability, real-life stories, and therapeutic tools, they unpack the emotional toll and begin the path toward healing. If you've ever felt exhausted by doing it all, unsure of where your needs fit in, or afraid to stop performing for love—this episode will feel like a mirror… and a lifeline. And remember, you don't have to earn love by doing. You are already worthy—just as you are. Listen now to learn: What high-functioning codependency is (and how it sneaks up on you) The roots of HFC: childhood dynamics, hyper-responsibility, and fear of abandonment How to begin healing through boundaries, self-worth, and inner reparenting Why awareness is the first act of liberation What to do in your relationship when one of you realizes you are a HFC Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

Your mindset shapes your relationship more than you might realize. In this episode of Love Isn't Enough, we unpack the powerful research on mindset and how your beliefs about growth, change, and learning directly influence the success of your relationship. Do you believe yourself or your partner to "just be the way you/they are"? Or do you approach challenges as opportunities to grow, both individually and together? We explore how a growth mindset is essential when it comes to developing the emotional and relational skills that lead to a thriving partnership. From conflict repair to deeper intimacy, we'll show you why being open to learning, rather than needing to be right, is the real secret to long-term connection. Tune in to shift your thinking—and strengthen your love. Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this episode of Love Isn't Enough, we're diving deep into the final two of Gottman's Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse—contempt and stonewalling—and exploring why these are the most damaging dynamics in relationships. We break down what they look like, why they show up, and how they silently erode connection, intimacy, and trust over time.   If you've ever felt dismissed, shut out, belittled, or emotionally abandoned by your partner—or maybe you've done it yourself—this episode will help you recognize these harmful patterns and start shifting toward repair and reconnection.   Tune in to learn the antidotes to contempt and stonewalling, and take one step closer to building a relationship that can truly thrive   Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this episode of Love Isn't Enough, Dr. John Schinnerer and Joree Rose take a deep dive into two of the biggest relationship killers: defensiveness and criticism. These behaviors, identified by Dr. John Gottman as part of the "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse," are major predictors of relationship dissatisfaction and conflict. But the good news? With awareness and intentionality, couples can break these toxic patterns and create healthier, more connected communication.   We explore: • What the Four Horsemen are and why they matter in relationships. • How criticism differs from constructive feedback—and why it often leads to defensiveness. • The underlying fears and wounds that drive defensiveness (and how to shift out of it). • Practical tools to replace criticism with compassionate communication. • How to create emotional safety so both partners feel heard and valued.   If you and your partner ever find yourselves stuck in a cycle of blame, frustration, or misunderstanding, this episode is packed with insights to help you break free and build a stronger, more resilient relationship.   Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

What if your love story started with a contest? In this episode of Love Isn't Enough, we're joined by Evin Rose and Alex Terranova, a couple whose unique journey to love is anything but ordinary. Alex, a coach and podcast host, decided to run a contest to find a date to bring to Tulum, Mexico—and Evin, a dating and self-worth coach, entered on a whim. What started as an unconventional experiment turned into a deep and meaningful relationship.   We dive into: • The inspiration behind Alex's contest and why he chose this unconventional approach to dating. • What made Evin say "yes" to entering—and how she navigated the experience. • How their relationship evolved from a playful beginning into something real and lasting. • The power of intention, trust, and alignment in building a healthy partnership. • Lessons they've learned about love, vulnerability, and creating a relationship that thrives.   This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking for love in unexpected ways—or who simply loves a great modern love story!   Connect with Evin Rose & Alex Terranova: • Evin's Instagram: @evinrose • Evin's website: https://www.evinrosecoaching.com/ • Alex's Instagram: @inspirationalalex • Alex's website: https://www.alexterranovacoaching.com/ Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn't Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/ If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who believes in love showing up in the most unexpected ways!