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today we’re covering one of the most confusing and emotionally loaded topics in eating disorder recovery: exercise. because movement can genuinely help anxiety. and it can also quietly become another way the eating disorder stays in control. in this episode, we talk about the role exercise plays in eating disorders, why stopping movement can feel terrifying, and how to tell the difference between moving to feel connected vs moving to control your body. i also share my personal relationship with exercise — from loving movement as a kid, to compulsive exercise in my eating disorder, to why i needed time away from exercise in treatment before i could ever rebuild a safer relationship with it. this is not a “never exercise again” episode. and it’s not a “just move intuitively” conversation either. it’s a nuanced look at intention, identity, and embodiment — and how to know when exercise is supporting recovery versus quietly running it. ⚠️ content note this episode is intentionally non-triggering: no numbers (weight, calories, vitals) no detailed behaviors no body comparison or before/after content in this episode, i talk about: – the “ED to gym girly pipeline” – how exercise can become compensatory – when movement shifts from regulating to controlling – identity and morality around being “disciplined” or “healthy” – why motivation matters more than the movement itself – why some people need a full break from exercise in recovery – my treatment experience with stopping and reintroducing movement – yoga, embodiment, and reconnecting with the body – how to recognize when exercise is becoming disordered again – questions to assess your relationship with movement ⏱️ episode timestamps 0:00 Intro 2:45 Why Exercise Is So Confusing in Recovery 9:20 My Early Relationship With Movement 13:30 When Exercise Became Compulsive 18:30 Exercise as Compensation 23:10 Identity, Morality, and “Discipline” 28:20 Treatment, Rest, and Why I Had to Stop 34:00 Reintroducing Movement Safely 39:45 When the Eating Disorder Wakes Back Up 43:15 Exercise Relationship Audit 49:30 Closing Reflections sponsor / resources Recovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recovery get $57 off with code PODCAST 👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloe

hi! welcome back to recovered-ish. this episode is about one of the most common thoughts that keeps people stuck in eating disorders: it’s not that bad. it could be worse. i’m not sick enough for help. we talk about where this belief comes from, why it feels so convincing, and how it’s reinforced by medical providers, mental health systems, social media, and comparison — even when someone’s inner world is completely consumed by food, body, and fear. i also share personal stories from my own experience, including being complimented on my body at a moment when i was close to asking for help, and later being told by a doctor that i was healthy despite being the most sick — moments that delayed care when i was deeply unwell. ⚠️ content note this episode is intentionally non-graphic: no numbers (weight, calories, vitals) no detailed behaviors no body comparison or before/after content in this episode, i talk about: – how eating disorders often begin from a well-intentioned place – the “honeymoon phase” where restriction can feel rewarding – when it stops feeling good and starts taking over – why physical markers aren’t reliable indicators of severity – medical and mental health invalidation – gaps in provider education around eating disorders – social media and the “not sick enough” comparison spiral – the eating disorder’s agenda and why it survives on delay – anosognosia (loss of insight) and why it’s so dangerous – wanting your pain to be visible – why you deserve care now, not later ⏱️ episode timestamps 0:00 Cold Open: The Lie 00:40 Introduction 03:20 The Honeymoon Phase 06:58 When It Stops Feeling Good 10:52 My Story: The Beach Compliment 12:59 Medical Invalidation 14:20 The Mental Illness Reality 17:13 Provider Education Gap 21:04 Social Media & Recovery Content 26:10 The Eating Disorder’s Agenda 31:33 Anosognosia: Loss of Insight 33:58 Wanting to Be Sick 36:55 You Deserve Care Now 37:42 Q&A: First Steps in Recovery sponsor / resources Recovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recovery get $57 off with code PODCAST 👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.c... follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloe

in this episode, we’re talking about the fear of weight gain — and why you can’t just “get over it.” if you’ve ever thought i want recovery, but i can’t handle my body changing, this episode is for you. we unpack why weight gain can feel like danger (not just discomfort), how avoidance wires fear, and why waiting to feel “okay” before taking action keeps people stuck for years. i also want to name this clearly: i recovered into a smaller body, and that comes with privilege. my experience is not universal. the fear, however, is something many of us share — and it deserves compassion, not shame. in this episode, we cover: why weight gain fear feels paralyzing, not superficial how avoidance makes food and body change feel unsafe the identity layer behind the fear (being “the small one,” the disciplined one, the acceptable one) thinness as protection in a cruel culture why you can’t think your way out of this fear why exposure — not confidence — is what actually reduces fear why body neutrality is a win (you don’t need body love to recover) the moment i accidentally saw my weight years into recovery — and what it taught me takeaway i want you to sit with: you don’t have to want your body to change. you don’t have to feel ready. you don’t have to love your body. actually, recovery happens when you do it afraid. fear in one hand. fork in the other. if this episode brought up insight, familiarity, or emotion — i’d love to hear from you. dm me or leave a comment wherever you’re listening. this podcast is a conversation. follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloe Creators + resources: i’m linking a few creators and clinicians i deeply respect who speak about recovery, body change, and weight stigma from perspectives beyond my own — including diverse body sizes, racial identities, and queer experiences: shira rosenbluth, lcsw — eating disorder therapist speaking openly about recovery into a larger body dr. rachel millner — body trust provider focusing on fear, safety, and weight stigma food psych podcast (christy harrison) — recovery, culture, and weight stigma conversations sonya renee taylor — body liberation through racial justice and collective healing megan jayne crabbe — lived recovery experience and body change narratives

in this episode, i share my eating disorder + recovery story — but not in the “before/after, numbers, shock value” way. i’m not here to give you content you can compare yourself to. i’m here to give you context, meaning, and the parts that actually matter. i talk about the early moments where body awareness and objectification started showing up way before food did, how perfectionism and high achievement shaped my brain, and how passion (for me: musical theatre) quietly morphed into an eating disorder before i even realized what was happening. this episode is about the function of the eating disorder — not just what it looked like. important note before you listen i do not share weights, numbers, behavior details, or “sick photos.” my goal is for you to leave feeling less alone, not more activated. in this episode, we cover: the earliest body memory i can still remember (and why it mattered)how objectification and “being perceived” can wire body shame earlyperfectionism: not the drive to achieve — the fear of failingpassion + obsession: how a “good trait” can become a risk factorthe perfect storm: temperament + stress + environment (college, change, isolation)how my eating disorder became intertwined with identity and performancethe moment i realized i had achieved my dream… and felt trapped by ithow the eating disorder functioned like an escape hatch (and why that’s so hard to let go of)what actually helped: support, treatment, and building a life i didn’t need to be saved fromthe question i want you to sit with: what is your eating disorder doing for you?sponsor / resources mentioned if you want real tools (not just insight), Recovery Skills Training is my step-by-step program that teaches the skills of recovery: food guilt, fear, identity, internal leadership, exercise, real-life situations, and more. get $57 off with code PODCAST: https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/ follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloe (instagram.com/recoverwithchloe) timestamps  00:00 intro + how i’m sharing this safely 02:34 why “ed storytime” can be harmful 06:06 early body awareness 12:27 perfectionism + high achievement 15:12 passion → disorder 18:47 the perfect storm in college 25:04 broadway + identity crisis 30:15 the eating disorder as an emergency exit 32:54 treatment + recovery 37:34 the questions 39:12 closing thoughts if anything in this episode brings up insight, familiarity, or emotion — i’d love to hear from you. comment wherever you’re listening, or DM me your thoughts. your story matters too.

welcome to the first episode of recovered-ish. in this episode, i share why i started this podcast, what recovered-ish actually means, and why the idea of “full recovery” isn’t as clear-cut as we’re often told. i’m 30 years old, over a decade into eating disorder recovery, and both a therapist and recovery coach. if you asked me today whether i’m fully recovered, my answer wouldn’t be a simple yes or no — and that nuance is exactly what this episode explores. this conversation focuses on the messy middle of recovery. the part that rarely gets talked about. the years where life expands and gets more meaningful, while food and body thoughts can still show up. in this episode, we cover: why i named this podcast recovered-ishwhy recovery isn’t linear and doesn’t have one finish linethe pressure to be “fully recovered” and how it can backfirehow perfectionism sneaks into recoveryredefining recovery in a way that’s sustainable and realwhat progress actually looks like without chasing perfectionsponsor / resources mentioned if this episode resonates and you want more structure, tools, and support, check out Recovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program that teaches the practical skills of eating disorder recovery. get $57 off with code PODCAST: https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/ timestamps 00:00 intro to recovered-ish  00:25 why i started this podcast  02:20 the reality of eating disorder recovery  03:15 is full recovery even possible?  05:24 my personal recovery journey  11:44 perfectionism in recovery  15:05 redefining what recovery means  20:16 learning to stay in the process  29:11 final thoughts + what’s next follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloe if you’ve ever felt stuck in the in-between or questioned whether you’re doing recovery “right,” this episode is for you.