Advertise on podcast: Static Radio

Bob gets surrounded by Josh Gates look-alikes at a Josh Gates appearance, while Miles gets served nachos from Harry Potter in the deep suburbs of Chicago. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/WfCzknOjFtE Static Radio – Scouser Gates Bob gets surrounded by Josh Gates look-alikes at a Josh Gates appearance, while Miles gets served nachos from Harry Potter in the deep suburbs of Chicago. Scouser Gates Bad AI Transcript Let’s turn this up a little bit. Oh, my talk is slow. Welcome to Static. This is Miles. Are you sure? Yes. one of these days you’re gonna get on here and you’re not gonna know who you are. I have this feeling I have the like you’re you’re gonna lose your marbles like all in like a weekend. I believe it yeah you’re gonna come and you’re like, I don’t even know how I got here. Yeah. You’re right. I’m already getting like that. I’m already getting like that shot well between that and, you know, multiple doctor visits. mm-hmm so you know, and you like going to for a colonoscopy like every year and a half or something, you know. I think you’re supposed to have it every year and a half right now 18 like a 18-month rotation no you’re not. Like every 10 years. Oh. Well, who the hell is that guy i’ve been going to that’s right who is that? He doesn’t even have any equipment. Just give Linda your $50 and come on back. Listen, kid, I don’t have time. I don’t have time. He always wears that gray alien mask. I don’t know what’s going on. Hey, speaking of adventures. Yes, yes. A segue, yes. Speaking of adventures, I had a slight adventure, as much of an adventure as an old white man could have this weekend. Yeah. I flew over to Thailand. No, I went to see. I’m the most falling for it. I’m like, what, really? What? We went to see Josh Gates. Oh, I just saw a blurb on that up in Peoria or something, right? Up in Peoria. That’s right. Cool. Yeah. Peoria. And went and saw the Josh Gates extravaganza. I don’t know what he calls it. Josh Gates, I’m here. Josh Gates, I’m taking a break from traveling. I don’t know what the name of the show was, honestly. Cool. Cool. Yeah, so we just drove there and back, and I kept going. So my son saw this a while back, and he kind of mentioned it, and then I think he was going to go with some friends, and they’re all like, who’s Josh Gates? Of course. And then he was telling us about that, and my wife was like, well, I’ll go. Yeah. And then I’m like, I guess I’m going, right? Yeah. And they’re like, well, it’s in Peoria. And I go, oh, we got to get a hotel. I can’t. Yeah, right. No, neither one of them. No, no, we don’t need a hotel. No, no. That was over the weekend? Yeah, it was on Saturday. Oh, wow. That’s really cool. So we drove all the way up to Peoria, which is like two and a half hours or something, maybe a little bit. more depending on who’s driving. And, uh, and drove back all in a day and in between had the dinner and saw josh gates live. You were just in Peoria. I know. That’s the weird thing, right? Isn’t that how things go, right? You just yeah weird like get into these things where it’s like, yeah. Well, first of all, The best part of the night was we got free parking. That’s not too hard. Okay. That’s not too hard. Okay. No, I don’t think it’s too hard. Okay. Well, because we stayed at that hotel and we noticed that none of the parking gates were working and none of the machinery was functioning. So we just parked there. Yeah. Right. Right. And it has a skywalk over to the convention center thing or whatever it’s called. Mm-hmm. The Peoria, everyone, you know, Peoria Huddle House right there. But the weird thing was, so we drove up and we went to Monocle’s, which, of course, is one of my favorite things, right? Oh, yeah, that little shopping center, yeah. No, Monocle’s, the pizza place. Yeah, it’s a little shopping thing, yeah. Well, we went to the one in Morton. Oh, I don’t know. I don’t know if you’ve been to that one. It is in the shopping center as well, but I had some delicious Monocle’s pizza, which actually you and I had one time, I remember. It’s right by a big thrift store. Yeah, it was. You’re right. Yeah, that’s where we ate, yeah. Oh, well, anyway, it was very good, although I will say not the speediest service. Yeah. Food was really, really good. But our lady who was supposed to be taking care of us seemed to disappear for long periods of time. I don’t know what was going on. Oh, Mel? Yeah. And then a couple of times I saw her coming out of the kitchen eating. Your food. Maybe she had it. Maybe that’s what took so long. She ate my pizza and then had to go make another one. Wait, did she make eye contact and, like, turn around and, like, run away? Yeah. Like, oh, shit. Like, oh, no, I’m eating a salad. We’re still waiting. Is that my salad? No. In the meantime, there was, like, three other – because this place was busy. I mean, it was really – it was packed, and it was busy. Yeah, yeah. And there was, like, three other waitress people, and they were buzzing around like little bees, giving everybody everything. And then they’re like, you know, what the hell? We got, you know – sally slow-mo over here eating pizza in the back. Another mess up. Everybody take us live. So, you know and then and then it’s getting to where we’re having to make a decision. You know, we get our food and everything and then we ask for the check right like after she brings the food. We’re like, we’ll take the check yeah and then the check sits there. Because she doesn’t come pick it up. And it’s getting to be time where we need to hustle. Right, right, yeah. And then this whole big, like, you know, damn family comes in and heads back to the rumpus room. Yeah. And guess who follows them? Oh, I’m here to help you tonight. I’m like, oh, we’re never going to get out of here. And so my wife’s like, I’m just taking it to the front. Oh, ballsy. Yeah. So she just took it up front and we paid up front rather than having her come pick it up. So I’m like, okay, I mean, that’s breaking protocol, but, uh, was she wearing her next generation uh workout no no she was not for this event. Although then we, uh, we, we head over to the free parking spot in the, uh, hotel garage, uh, And, um, there’s like people everywhere. There’s all these people. And I’m like, holy moly, this thing must really be popular oh yeah i’m like this is this is crazy well uh it wasn’t that popular really yeah two they had two things going on. There was a hockey game and the josh gates thing on the same night in different parts of this big building. And I’m like, it was two of the widest audiences. They all looked like they could go to either one. I’m thinking half the people had like those stupid Indiana Jones hats. Yes, they did. And with vests. And the others had hockey jerseys and baseball caps probably. And so we thought it was like all for this thing. But then the guards are yelling, hockey people stay to the left and keep going. And the rest of you nerdy bastards. All you nerds go in here. I just met all these wannabe people dressed up like Indiana Jones. There was quite a few people with the hat. And so we get in, you know, and it was probably about half full-ish, I would say. Um, certainly the, the main level was half full. That’s where we were at. And then they had like upper levels, which there was nobody up there so yeah and uh and so yeah and yes there were people with the hats and the crazy thing was, it’s like everybody was either in the front or in the back and the middle was just kind of empty. Yeah. I was like, well, that’s, That’s interesting. I mean, there’s your demographic, right? The people who are so into it, they got to get in the front row. Which is you. No, I was in the back. Or cheap bastards like me who are sitting in the back because those were the cheaper tickets. Which are still like $60 or something. Right, they’re still like $60, exactly. So then the other thing is we get in, you know, and the row we have to go in… I want to put a plea out there to anybody who’s making an auditorium. I know it cuts into your profits, but always, always, always have a center aisle. No. This thing is like side to side, solid chairs. Yeah. There’s only two side aisles. And of course, when you get there and there’s a whole like f*****g family right there at the end. Of course. Then we have to climb over. Ha ha ha ha ha. and so we’re like, okay, here we go. Right. And so we, you know, we’re kind of towards the middle, I guess. And so we’re going down the row and there’s like, I don’t know, there’s had to be like eight of them or something like that. Well, everybody gets up, but this old guy, he doesn’t get up. I’m not getting up for you you dumb he rude the day that he did not get up. Oh, grandpa. So I’m like, You know, these size 12 feet cannot fit down this f*****g aisle shuffling sideways without a little bit of space. And I stepped fully, and I mean fully, on both of his f*****g feet. Oh, you bastard. This guy had to be like a bad diabetic or something because he didn’t even make a noise. Yeah. I’m like, sorry, sorry. And I’m like, crunch, crunch. Oh, my God. I mean, you weigh like 400 pounds. That’s better. I felt his toenails crackling. Yeah, he’s probably a tough guy. I was a nom. Yeah, he was tough then. I don’t know. I’m assuming he was like neuropathy is like. severe or something. I was on pork chop hill god damn it. I could take a fat guy walk across my feet. I’ve still got a bullet in my butt cheek. Yeah. We make our way down to our seats and we sit down and amazingly enough, my butt fit in th

Miles tells a political pollster that his wife has passed away, while Bob skates through a convenience-store wedding party. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/RHPNZU5jnsw Static Radio – Judy’s Kitchen Miles tells a political pollster that his wife has passed away, while Bob skates through a convenience-store wedding party. Greasy Pollster Bad AI Transcript rrrrrrrrrrrrrr You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. Hey everyone, this is Miles. Welcome to Static. Thank you. I’m going to get all misty-eyed here. I know. That’s what I was hoping for. Goodness gracious. You don’t hear things like that every day. Well, I just thought, you know, you might need it after you travel so much. The truth comes out eventually, everyone. Yep. The truth comes out. It comes out. How you doing, Miles? You doing okay tonight? How’s your, you know, frailties? You know, had not all my friends left me, you would be further down the list, unfortunately. Lucky for me. Yeah. Yeah, thank you. I’m kind of divorced from all my friends at this point, so yeah. Well, yeah. I’m stuck with you, so. Maybe I should get divorced, because then I can get some alimony at least. I mean, you’re kind of like my Wilson. You know what I’m saying? Wilson! I mean, you’re just like this stupid head with a stupid face. You have to think. The Wilson thing. That’s Tom Hanks. Just move it to bosom buddies. Exact same expressions at everything. There’s no… His acting, there’s no difference between Tom Hanks in Bosom Buddies and Tom Hanks… Castaway. Absolutely none. Peter! Peter Scolari! Right? Buffy! Buffy and Hildy! Hildy or something. I watched that show. I did watch that show. I don’t care what they say anymore. This is my life. leave me alone yeah there’s no, I don’t know how tom hanks is, everybody’s like, he’s so great because i mean you can, you can play these things together and they would be the exact same. You just have buffy and Wilson. Just swap some word you know, names in there. Yeah, I was watching Gray Wolf or Gray Lady or whatever the hell it’s called. It’s like the movie, by the way. I go, man, that’s his exact same role as Booth and Buddies. I mean, you put them side by side. That captain fighting the Nazis is just like Hildy. He always plays a character named Kip. He was Captain Kip. Yeah, right. Even in the one where he gets the pirates come and get him. Captain Kip. You know, he mixed in Captain Phillips, Grey Lady. What is that? Is it Grey Lady? Or what is that called? Grey Lady. Grey Lady. No, come on. What is that called? Is that Grey Lady? Grey Lady Town, I think is what it was called. He plays the same character in every movie. It’s weird. I was watching that, and then I watched Bachelor Party. I’m like, oh, my God. It’s insane. It is the same performance. From Decatur, Illinois. Oh, my God. Yeah. See, Wolf Captain. Same performance. Same guy, so limited. I love it when it came through the, you know, the little airlock area, and he’s holding the door because you guys, oh, what’s going on? Oh, no. There’s a topless woman on the bridge. What? It’s all like more your Barney Fife. I know. Unfortunately, I don’t really have a good time. Do Barney Fife doing that line again. I want to hear that again. Which one? There’s a topless woman on the roof. What? There’s a topless woman on the roof? foster girl. I think they need to recast that whole movie. That great lady. I have to work on my tom hanks impression well son there you go. You see the nazis submarine and the dude. Colin Hanks has more range than tom Hanks, which is interesting. No, I don’t know. Oh yeah. Oh, Chet Hanks. Anyway. No, Chet Hanks, I will agree with you. Yes, he’s a star. Did you notice Woody is the same as the guy in Philadelphia? Did you notice that at all? I didn’t notice that. I did. Settle down, man. Settle down. Oh, man. He’s like, there’s a snake in my boot. That line was in Philadelphia, the courtroom. Yeah, all right. Trails your snake. All right. We didn’t even get into Polar Express. Damn it. That’s right. All right, we better cut it. Even worse, the Polar Express is the creepiest thing ever. Yeah. Why people like that is beyond me. It’s so freaking creepy. Oh, you just like Eddie Deason. Yeah, well… Although I’ve met Eddie Deason, actually. Have you really? Yes, I did. I had to wait. He was late showing up, believe it or not. Sorry, I’m late. I stuck on the Ferris wheel. Mike, you stupid. Oh, my goodness. Well, I don’t have any stories about celebrities this week, but. Well, that’s the end of the show. Thank you, everyone, for listening, and good night. I did meet Tom Hanks at a Dickie Bub’s store. No, I didn’t. So I complained about having to work over the weekend before we started recording, and then you, of course, mentioned it and everything. i drive across for my work, I have to, I go all over Missouri. Sometimes I go other places, right? I had to go to texas and you know, I go various places. I’ve had to go to las vegas and california and all this kind of stuff so hollywood redwood that’s right yeah i love l.a um so anyway i had to go to jefferson city in missouri state Capitol. And I took a picture of the state capital out my hotel window and sent it to you. And you’re like, what’s that? There’s a snake in my boot. There’s one in my pants. And so anyway, I had to spend my Saturday in Jefferson City. And so then whenever I got done, I drive Highway 70. Highway 70 is the main highway that bisects from east to west the state of Missouri. And it is a killer highway. A lot of people die on it. There’s always traffic jams and things backed up for miles and everything. And I’ve had to drive it now for over 30 some years. So anyway, I get done with my thing in Jefferson city and I’ve always been told all these years are like, don’t go down 70, go down this high, like rural highway 50. Especially in the fall. Right. It’s beautiful. It’s beautiful. Was it like a man in like a Nazi uniform that told you that? My friend Belak, he told me. No, no. People have told me this over the years. And I’ve never gone down Highway 50. And so I was there. And I got to leave a little bit early, which is not the norm. And I’m like, it’s only about 10 or 15 minutes longer, it says on the map, you know. I’ve told all these years, never had a maps option until recently. But anyway, I’m like, I’m going to go down Highway 50 on the way home. And I do. It was beautiful. It’s rolling hills. You go up and down. You and Bellock. Yeah. You and Bellock from Raiders. Go ahead. Blow it back. Go ahead. Go ahead, Bob. Eat onion rings. Blow it back to God. Let’s blow it back to God. To God. And so I’m driving down highway 50. It’s just, it’s beautiful. It’s great. You know, you should, you should drive it. I was, they were all right. And I’ve been ignoring them for, you know, decades. Yeah. And so I’m enjoying myself now, you know, I’m like, wait a minute. I’m going to have to get gas. Yeah. I didn’t even think of this. I didn’t even think about this. You know, and I’m also, I’m very hyper vigilant about where I stop, you know. I believe this to use the restroom, and I know all the restrooms that I like to stop at on highway 70, which I got a new one. I talked about it a few weeks ago. I don’t know any restrooms on highway 50, and I don’t even know if there’s going to be a gas station. I mean, this is like not a major highway. This is, you know, a county, you know, state highway kind of situation. Luckily though, there was plenty of little towns along the way, you know, but you know, I, I like Casey’s, but they don’t always have the cleanest bathrooms. Agreed. Agreed. So they’re not like, they’re like emergency stop, not high on the list. Right. Um, And so I passed a few cases, and then I was coming up on the biggest town on this route until I got to, you know, closer to St. Louis, which was called Union, Missouri. All right. Have you ever been to Union, Missouri? Thankfully, no. Oh, it’s a nice little town. I would love to live in Union. What struck me, two things struck me. One was good. One was bad. I was driving by the local college, probably a community college in days gone by that’s now just a college. I don’t know how they changed the names. I have no idea. They had a big sign, like one of those electronic signs, and it said, come tonight to watch Blade Runner with film discussion afterwards. Ooh, I’m there. I’m like, why did they do cool shit like that whenever I was, you know? I know. I’d stay and watch Blade Runner again. Oh, yes. Anyway, so I thought that was really cool, and I thought, this is the place to stop. Look, they have Blade Runner playing at the college for free, and they’re going to discuss it. And I think you’re a replicant. That’s right. That’s right. I’m sure you’re not human. I’m sure you’re a replicant. Yeah. What do you, how do you react whenever you see a snake? All right. Yeah. I go, it’s in my boot. And then, uh, so then I come up to like the, the, you know, kind of the bigger area of businesses, you know, with all the different McDonald’s and all that kind of stuff. And there’s several gas stations and I, I’m low on gas at this point. Cause I didn’t fill up ahead of time and I have to take a whiz. And so I pull in, I’m like, I got like mobile, you know, 66 and they have a QT. Yeah. QT is called quick trip here in the area. I don’t know if people have those elsewhere, but QT. And I’m like, I’m choosing the, I’m choosing the QT. Yeah. It looks to be the biggest convenience store amongst the corner gas stations. And I’m going to choose the QT. Beca

Salida UFO Footage 1995 In this episode of Mondo Freako, host Bob LeMent is joined by Houston Pierce, creator of the interview-based podcast 1,000 Crazy Questions, to discuss paranormal trivia and the infamous 1995 Salida, Colorado UFO footage. Houston participates in a high-stakes trivia quiz testing his knowledge of the legendary daylight sighting recorded by resident Tim Edwards after being alerted by his six-year-old daughter. Despite missteps on cigar-shaped craft classifications and missing out on final points, Houston defends his choices with sharp wit and skepticism. Transitioning from the quiz to the actual video, Bob and Houston analyze the grainy, historic footage of the mysterious hovering craft. The conversation broadens into a lively debate touching on secret military anti-gravity technology, defense economics, submarine-shaped naval concepts, and Occam’s razor. Throughout the banter, Houston promotes his ongoing project at thousandcrazyquestions.com and via Instagram, while Bob guides listeners through another deep dive into the weird world of UFO lore and unexplainable aerial phenomena. 1000 Crazy Questions @1000CrazyQuestions https://youtube.com/live/ASqiKx7gEEw UFO Witness Game (Click Graphic to Start) Transcript (AI transcription) Houston. How can there be Houston in Colorado? I think it’s kind of like there’s a weird in Texas and there’s a Colorado in Alabama. I don’t know. Words are made up. Words are Rico. I got Houston Pierce from 1000 Crazy Questions with me. Hey, Houston. Hey, how’s it going, Bob? Good. I hope you’re doing well. It’s starting to get cold. Not enjoying that too much, although it is 81 degrees still here at the moment. Is it cool where you’re at? It’s just now starting to get cool. But unlike you, I do like it. I mean, it gives me a chance to break out, you know, the winter gear. I don’t know about you, but Most of my wardrobe is like jackets, hoodies, and stuff like that. It goes with my wardrobe, totally. Exactly, yeah. And my wardrobe is naturally built for the cold, so I’m fine. Oh, well, then good. Now, everybody doesn’t know, Houston’s got a show called Thousand Crazy Questions. You can catch it right here, thousandcrazyquestions.com, or… at on the Insta and other places, thousand crazy questions. Look at that. I can’t believe it. You want to help give people a real quick brief synopsis on what do you really have? How many questions have you asked so far? I mean, what number are you keeping track of the numbers? There’s no way I can keep track. There’s no way. I think if I did have a, I think I have 83 episodes up. i’ve recorded over, I think i’ve recorded about a hundred and i’m passing up 90 really soon in this next season. So if i do the math, uh, with about seven episodes, average times 83 being recorded and fully asked, then eight, seven times 83, I have asked a math. seven times 83 i’ve asked is 581, according to my calculator then i have and i have asked on air, on camera, and at least recorded 583 questions. There you go. Okay, well, hey, you’re making a lot of headway then you you’re halfway more than halfway there. Yeah, more or less. That’s why that’s What I’ve asked within the collective career of what’s been on there. Actually, I know I’ve asked more than that, but that’s what you can find. That’s what’s documented is what you’re saying. The show is an interview-based podcast where I ask different guests every week a bunch of would-you-rather questions and just different hypothetical scenarios to interview them. And it gets weird. It gets deep. it gets silly and, uh, yeah, just always try to be entertaining on it. But that’s, that’s for sure. I’ve been on, I think at least twice. I can’t remember now, but at least yeah Yeah. And Houston asked me some very naughty questions. One time he’s like, are you okay for these kind of really, uh, terrible? I go, sure. Whatever. Do you remember that I remember. That might have been the first time I was on. You’re like, yeah, I’m going to ask you these horrible questions. I’m like, oh, okay. Yeah, because I remember I think it was near the end or something. You were like, you, I think you said you lulled me in with the good ones. Right. And then at the end you’re like, these questions are terrible. It was a horrible question, but I answered it. Everybody’s like, I couldn’t stop laughing at that. Like, you lulled me. You’re like, oh, these cutesy questions. And then, boom, a hardcore, you know, nasty question. I tried to warn him. But also, yeah. But also, I don’t know, I was talking to a blue cat. And I remember I had a fever that day, too. So that was definitely a vibe. Right. You’ll have to go back and check and see if it happened. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like i think i think this cartoon cat can answer this question, I think. He answers anything, goodness gracious. He’s such a weirdo. But everybody check it out, A Thousand Crazy Questions. It’s a lot of fun if you’re you know, want to be on the show, you know, just reach out through Instagram. Oh, yeah. You still have you on. He’ll ask you some terrible, horrible question. Yeah. I’m just joking this is okay Only if you’re able to take it. That’s right. We don’t want anybody crying. There’s no crying on a thousand crazy questions. No, no. Unless it’s funny. And then which case maybe, but I’m kidding. But yeah, reach out to me at one K crazy questions at Gmail. That’s another one. I got to type in here. You don’t have to type. It’s just the email. If you want to reach out directly, otherwise Instagram is just fine to be on the show. If you want to reach out to me, um, but yeah let’s see if this is that look correct uh yeah yeah that’s it there you go. We’ll throw it up there. So yeah, if you want to reach out, be on the show. But this show is mondo frico and um we’re going to talk about something weird. You always have a choice at the beginning of mondo Frico. We talk about something strange. It’s usually in the world of the paranormal, in the world of the cryptids, or in the world of the UFOs, which is almost kind of like, well, I guess it could be in the water, but it’s kind of like sky, land, and ether, maybe, with paranormal. But we always try to, everybody else, if you want to take the quiz first, or do you want to take the quiz after we talk about what we’re going to talk about? I think… I think all the times I’ve been on before, I’ve asked for it first because I’m a sociopath who likes challenging myself. Okay. Well, I’m not a true sociopath. I shouldn’t say that. But I do like the challenge of going in completely blind. I’ll do it again. Doing the quiz? Yeah. Quiz. Quiz. Quiz. Quiz. There you go. Houston’s going to do the quiz. Here we are with the quiz. This is about the Salada. I hope I’m saying that correctly. Video footage from 1995. I know in 1995 you may not have been in existence yet, but it’s something to be, you know, to pay attention to. The Salada video footage in 1995. I’m going to start. We’ve got five questions here. We’re going to see how Houston does. And if you look here, Houston, it may be hard on your screen, but there’s a little easy button here, right? So it’ll be easy, medium, or hard. First question for you is easy. I always have a hint. Here is your first question. Are you ready, sir? I’m ready. In August 1995, which Salada, Colorado resident famously recorded a widely discussed daylight video of an anomalous flying object? Was it… Tim Edwards, Dale Salata, Arthur Cooper, or George Adamski. And I have a hint if you want to. Okay. So this is called the Salata video footage. And there’s a guy named Dale Salata in the options. Yeah. But something is telling me to not pick number D. I’ll probably go with Dale. I’m probably going to say it’s a guy named Dale. You want to go with Dale? I feel like. You sure? I feel like Dales are the people who just do this. Nothing to do with it. The king of the hill. Yeah. Great job, our boy. Love you. There is a UFO out there, Hank. Yeah. I have a hint if you want to do the hint. There’s no shame in doing the hint. I will not shame myself by doing the hint. I think this is a Dale. The last name has nothing to do with it. I think this is a Dale thing. Okay. Let’s see. Let’s reveal. Oh, no. It’s Tim Edwards. Hey, Tim Edwards recorded the footage in August 1995 after his six-year-old daughter alerted him. Look, daddy, UFO. There you go. He has a cool last name. Is there really, Dale Salata, or is that fully made up? I think it’s just made up. Okay. Because Salata is like, that means like to exit or something, right? That’s like Spanish for exit. Okay. Like Dale… Exit. georgia damski is a real person. Uh, I mean, they’re all real people. I’m sure with this names, but, uh, georgia damski is actually somebody, and i can’t remember why, what he is noted for but he’s somebody so got it all right you ready for ready for number two or no, I don’t know if that was easy. I may be cooked. Well, you don’t know anything about the topic. It just got sprung on you. So there you know what i mean? It’s hard. I’m trying. You’re going in blind, you know? So this was a medium question. It may be easier. Who knows? These little buttons, I think they just randomly pepper them in there. I don’t know. What general geometric shape is commonly used to describe the prominent UFO captured in the 1995 Salada video footage? Is it A, a triangle? B, a cigar or tube shaped? C, a perfect sphere? Or D, a flat disc? i do have a hint if you want it. This is all very a lot of classic ufo shapes there. Yeah. There was a cigar shaped uh asteroid that was going to kill us some years ago oh yeah yeah yeah I don’t know if it was going to kill us, but yeah. All right. I think it was just headed towards us. It did come

Bob and Miles meet for dinner at TikTok influencer Judy’s Kitchen in Galesburg, IL, for an impromptu gathering. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/nPO-PsG9g08 Static Radio – Judy’s Kitchen Bob and Miles meet for dinner at TikTok influencer Judy’s Kitchen in Galesburg, IL, for an impromptu gathering. Judys Kitchen Bad AI Transcript You can play with Bob’s balls if you want to. You can leave your friends behind. Hey, everyone, this is Miles with Static Radio. Probably would leave your friends behind if that was the case. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Another week. Another week. A week in the life. Here we are. Here we go. Here we go. Another week. Yeah. Miles and I had dinner together. Yes. Not even a week ago now. Bacon shake. No. No, we had Judy’s Kitchen or whatever, wasn’t it? Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy. Believe it or not, we actually saw each other, uh, in our human form in Galesburg. Bob was like, I didn’t know you’d like pina coladas. So, yeah, so that’s been weird. So I was in Peoria tagging along on a junket. Yeah. With my wife. And I’m like, hey, you know. Yeah. Well, my wife wanted to go to Judy’s Kitchen. Right. If you don’t know who Judy’s Kitchen is, you’re not from around these parts because she’s like a famous TikToker. Influencer. Influencer, yeah. And she’s like, we’re close enough. It’s only like 40 minutes away. I’m like, okay. I’m like, wait a minute. Miles lives about the same distance on the other side of Galesburg. And so I said, would it be okay if we met Miles at Judy’s? And my wife said, f**k no. Oh. Oh, no, she didn’t say that. She said, if you must. Oh, yeah. Which is worse? Which reaction is worse to you? Oh, f**k. I don’t know. That would be nice. It would be nice if you boys got together. Well, that’s nice. I’m glad. Yeah. So anyway, I said you know, I, I sent you a note and we’re like yeah we’re gonna do this. We had, we were a little bit late because, uh, you know, festivities and whatnot yeah so you know, you and i met up, uh, yeah. Right. Right. Which I will say was actually not, you know, I was hoping for more the dinner part. Okay. I was hoping it would be better. It was just kind of there, you know what I mean? How was yours, by the way? Delicious. Really? I had the Kung Pao. You had Kung Pao. Mm-hmm. I had General Tso’s. Mm-hmm. I can’t remember what my wife got. I don’t know. Your son had orange chicken because I was sitting across from him. Mm-hmm. I don’t even remember what my wife had. Now I’m thinking about it. I should probably remember that above all. She had some crab Rangoon. Oh yeah. I had the crab Rangoons. Yeah. Yeah. And your son got a free glass. Did he? Well, I don’t think he stole it, but I told him he should. Nah, he doesn’t. He’s better than me. He wouldn’t do that. I would do it. Yeah, you were like, hey, I got these sweatpants on, son. They’ll fit right here in the old crotch. No, I got in trouble once because I did steal a knife from Sizzler once. I got kind of yelled at for doing that. Those Sizzler knives, they were collector’s items. They’re like red plastic handled. Like a freaking clown knife or something. So yeah, we met for dinner, which is an unusual occurrence. Yeah. I know, and I almost pretended like I was going to honk your wife’s nose when she walked by. Uh-oh. Yeah, that wouldn’t have went over. She’s not in the nose play. Yeah, I don’t think that would have went over very well. I didn’t touch her, but I imagined I did. Well, I think you could probably say that about a lot of people. She’s got such a little teeny tiny nose, though. What? Okay. She’s got a small nose. Really? Well, compared to you. Well, no, my whole family’s got like these big polack noses. But she doesn’t, you know i mean well yeah i don’t know, I’m just saying i’ll tell you about that, but anyhow. No, I’m just saying. I’m getting a little weirded out by this nose talk. I have this weird feeling that you’re combing, you know weird tiktok instagram pages about noses or something. I don’t know what’s going on it’s all kinds of weird things going on. I’m grooming her for her nose. Yeah, I don’t know what, you know. Is there a nose fetish? I don’t know. No, I’m just saying she has a proportional nose she’s oh that’s very nice. I’ve got like this carol malden nose like everyone in my family, and i’m jealous i’m like wow i was cursed like one of those uh one of those elephant seals. Cha-cha-cha-cha-cha. It’s like flapping around. You’re like… You lean your head back. You’re trying to… Every time you try to drink, you just get a glass full in your nose. No, these credits are no good. That’s me. Yeah. That’s me. Yeah. So, yeah, I’m sorry. I quite a lot. Oh, but yeah. But no, we had dinner. It was it was nice. I was nice. I will say. Yeah. Out of the four of us at the table, you were the weirdo. I know what you’re going to say. I know what you’re going to say. Because my son and I had this conversation on the way home. Oh, did you? Yes. I’m like, maybe I should do this more often. He makes me look normal. Yeah. With his actions. He’s like such a weirdo at dinner. He’s so weird. I’m like, have you ever leave the house? I mean, you go out more than I do. Yeah. You got like your eyes are wiggling and your hands are doing things and making weird gestures. And you’re like making these noises. And it’s like, I’m like, what is wrong? I’m like David Byrne and stop making sense. I’m doing a little thing where I’m chopping my arm. You know, you might ask yourself. And then. You’re like, you know, I don’t know if this was like some kind of weird flirting you were doing with the waitress. I don’t know. But I mean, obviously she wasn’t taking it that way. She was taking it that you possibly had some kind of brain problems. It’s asking you questions because your wife was not feeling well. She didn’t make it in. You got her some egg rolls. It took you like 15 f*****g minutes to say, can I order egg rolls to go? I was, you know, just trying to be dramatic pausing. It was like Shatner times 10. It was a sous serre. It was a sous serre. It was a dramatic pause. I would like to have an order of what you might call… F*****g epileptic Hugh Grant over here. I… i would like even your son was like, what the hell with you old man yeah well i remember egg rolls and you’re driving oh my lord i thought i was all right yeah and i was just like, ah, it’s just like, you know, you’re like i just didn’t want the waitress to leave, you know, like, Vera, don’t know oh no! I just shined up my shoes. Oh, no. Yeah. Thankfully, you know, she, but she thought you were weird too. I could tell, I could tell with her demeanor. Oh, I think she thought, no, I don’t know. I don’t know. Yeah. I’m pretty sure. No, I think she’s used to it. She kept stepping back away from me. Yeah. She’d scoot back every time you moved your hand. Like it was going to reach out and grab her or something. She was pulling away from my gravitational pull. She’s like, oh, f**k. Gravity. What the f**k? Get away. Yeah. What’s in this Kung Pao? Holy shit. It’s like a black hole over here. I’m just reading your shirt. Yeah. You’re so weird. I’m like, he’s really weird. When we left, I’m like, God, Miles is really weird. That’s normal, isn’t it? I go, no, he’s weirder than usual. She’s like, really? I go, yes. If that f****r talks about your nose, I’m going to punch him out. She has a very nice nose. She has a nice nose. But no, yeah, you were all, you know, I don’t know. You have not hit on what my son and I were talking about, though. Well, did you touch yourself a bunch? I don’t know. I was at the table. Okay. Did you fart? I don’t know. No. Are those your main points, first of all? Well, your eyes were very shifty. You kept looking around. You made weird hand gestures. You couldn’t think with any kind of clarity. I’m like, is he choking out? What did your son say? No, no, I brought this up to him. You ate like a pig. You’re like, rah, rah. And I was like, hmm. No. So we all ordered different things, as you touched upon. And everyone. We shared, honestly. We had so much food. Yeah. And you guys all got rice, right? Right. Oh, the noodles. Oh, you and the f*****g noodles. And I ordered little Maine. They have a name. It’s called little Maine. It’s not called Chinese spaghetti, by the way, which you kept saying, which I thought was a little racist. I’m like, all right. Well, for the sake of show, he didn’t wink. And, uh, I see you’re even winking. Now you’re winking there. You’re winking. Now I have, I have some eating issues. I have to eat slower than everyone else. Okay. And, uh, did your mom told you or something? I don’t know. No, it’s just, it is a problem I have, which is not a big deal, but I don’t, you know, it’s not a big deal. And so can you explain this? Why slower? And the new, I have a swallowing problem. I do. No, I don’t laugh. If you want, I have a swallowing, right? Slower. Exactly why you should never go to prison. I used to be the fastest eater at the table, and now I’ve gone to by far the slowest. So these guys get their rice in a separate bowl, and my noodles come in a separate bowl, right? Right. They’re in a bowl. They’re in a bowl. Okay. I don’t know. I should have just thrown that in with my my main course. I should have just mixed it all together because like I’d eaten most of my main course, but I really hadn’t had the noodles. So I thought, well, maybe I’ll just start scooching noodles over from the plate that came on into the main plate. Right. And so I’m trying

Miles experiences reality differently than his wife, while Bob goes out to eat in his own section at the restaurant. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://www.youtube.com/live/lz2qqNO-uH8?si=E7TzGCvmIhYnKliq Static Radio – Pharmacy Walk Miles experiences reality differently than his wife, while Bob goes out to eat in his own section at the restaurant. Restaurant Jerk Bad AI Transcript Do, do, do, do, do, do. Who farted? Well, it’s not going to go, so. So we’ll just have to do it manually. Yeah, clear your throat a few more times. And then have a little static noise. And then, oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. You got it, guys. Static. Hey, everybody. Welcome to the show. This is Bob. Hey, Miles with Static Radio here. I’m traveling, and so we’ve got the lesser setup. I have a lesser setup. Miles has the exact same setup. It’s a fart-free podcast, so enjoy yourself. Yeah. What do you mean by that? I was saying, you know, there was some suspect odor, apparently. Yeah. On your end of things there, but apparently that’s when you cleared up or something. Yeah, apparently the ventilation has kicked in, so we’re all good here. We’re all fine here. How are you? Blast them! Conversation was going nowhere. Yeah. So, yeah, welcome, everybody. It’s… October. Can you believe it? Yeah, it is October. It’s that getting the Halloween season now? Yeah. Which is nice. Are you planning your Halloween costume for this year? Maybe, yeah. Are you going to put up your AT-AT in the front yard or your elephant, whatever it is? No, I was going to shave my head, though, and go as Baby New Year. Okay. I think you can pull that off, actually. Get some tighty-whities I was going to wear. Well, possibly some Depends. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Baby New Year. Probably be like… Yeah. Yeah. I got my pumpkins ready to go. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You went to the pumpkin patch recently. A few skeletons. I’m ready to go. Oh, good. Yeah. Ready. That’s fantastic. Well, we, uh, my daughter was recently in town and, you know, uh, We don’t get to see her in person that often. And so when she’s in town, we usually take her to wherever she wants to go to eat. And we took her to this wood fireplace. Everything’s wood fired. Oh, sure. You ever been to one of those? I thought I saw it in a magazine once, yeah. I know you don’t get out much. Yeah, I’m not allowed. If it’s not like fast food… I had to be jealous of you. I know. I know. That’s how sad my life is. I know. So we go, we’re, we’re go out to this wood fired place and, uh, you know, it’s nice. It’s a nice place. And, um, you know, we’re, uh, there’s a group of us, several of us. And so, um, they, you know, we’re a little bit early on the early side of dinner, perhaps I like to be early, you know, Oh, wait. Is this the picture you sent me the other day? No, no. That was another place we went to. Oh, my God. Jesus. How much steak can one guy eat in one week? Well, we didn’t know. This was pizza. We had a wood fire pizza. Oh, shit. I thought we were eating steak all week. No, no. I did have a steak. I have a story about that place, but it’s not as funny as this story. So we get seated. everything’s good. We’re kind of in an area. There’s some other people in the, in that, you know, the dining rooms, they got to divide it up into several things. And so we’re, you know, having a good time talking and, and getting our appetite, you know, my daughter is so spoiled. It’s like, we normally, when we go out, we get nothing, right. We just get something to eat barely, you know, bear sustenance. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I’m usually, all I get is the captain’s crackers. Doubtful. Doubtful. Whenever she’s in town, it’s like appetizers and desserts and, you know, third course and all this kind of stuff. Let’s have some appetinis. So we got the appetizers going and everything. And so then more people are showing up because it’s now, it’s going to be, you know, regular dinner time. Yeah. We get drinks. Yeah. Everybody gets drinks. So, So they come in the little area that we’re in and they’re going to sit them at a table, not too far from us, you know, the next table over and the people are like, um, now can we move? Okay. They weren’t, they weren’t being rude or anything. They were just like, no. And they pointed, you know, someplace else in the, in the area. And so then they go away and it was just like a couple. I guess they didn’t want to be over in a corner or whatever. Didn’t think anything of it. And then we get our food. We’re eating. Another group comes in, a bigger group. And they sit at the bigger table on the other side of us. Oh, no. No, no. We want to go over. We want to go over to the other side of the restaurant. So you were farting? No. I was like, And so then my daughter’s like, what is going on? No one wants to sit by you. No one wants to sit by us. Like Charlie Brown’s family up for. Yeah. Pig pen. So then. Yeah. So then another family comes in. No, no. And there are four people. There’s a table. It’s not right next to us. It’s a little ways away. It’s within acceptable Midwestern dining limits. Right, right. This isn’t New York where you sit hip to hip. You know what I mean? Right, right. This is cornfield country where you’re like half a mile away, for Christ’s sake, at the next table. And they’re like, no, we don’t want to sit there. And the guy goes, you have to. he made him sit there. The waiter did. He’s got nothing else. I don’t want to sit next to that big, ugly broad. Oh, that’s a man? Oh, I’m sorry. So yeah, my daughter was like, is there something wrong? What is going on? I’m like, I barely even noticed, to be honest. They told me, and then I’m like, yeah, I guess you’re right. They didn’t want to seem to sit over there, and then they didn’t want to sit, you know. And, yeah, I guess you’re right, you know. I’m oblivious. She’s like, what is wrong? What are you people doing? They were all intimidated with all you guys eating salad, probably. They’re like, oh. Ah. Well, actually, I’m the only one that didn’t eat salad that night. These fancy people eating salad? There was a bunch of salad going on the table. Not for me. But yeah, I couldn’t believe it. I don’t know what the deal was. I was not farting. I did not stink. You weren’t telling dirty jokes. We weren’t even talking about saying the F-bomb or anything. Hey, f**k, f**k, f**k, f**k. My family, yeah. Yeah, none of that. We’re very polite, cordial, nice people. There was other people sitting behind us. They didn’t seem to have a problem. They were having a good old time. Wait, that is the lady who yelled at us on the boat in Germany. I remember her. She told us to get out of the way. Yeah, so I don’t know what was going on, but nobody wanted to sit in that area. And they’ve got it all, you know, like five tables in a section or something. It’s crazy. It’s so sectioned off. But yeah, the last people, they’re like, no. This is it. It’s this or out. We’ve laid down the law. And those people were noisy. They were all hairy and they were eating this wood-fired food being extremely noisy. Yes. Like the f*****g Morlocks moved in or something. That’s right. You’re like the Eloy, and they’re like the Morlocks. Yeah, Morlocks. Everybody read Time Machine by H.G. Wells. Yeah, no one will know what the f**k that is. What? One of the few books I’ve read. Yeah, same, same. I’m like, yeah, I don’t know what was going on. Nobody stunk. It was bizarre. And my daughter seemed a little bit upset about it. Did you quiz these people? Like, excuse me. Yeah, I will pay for your dinner if you tell me why the f**k won’t you sit next to me. I can’t do that. I cannot do it, sir. Were they like hoity-toity people? No, they’re all morons like everybody else. They don’t meet our high standards here in East St. Louis. Yeah, they all look like they’re half a click off. No, they’re just regular people, I guess. I don’t know what the deal was. I mean, we weren’t even near the bathroom or anything. The bathroom, they actually went closer to the bathroom. I’d rather sit right by the s*****r than sit with them people over there. Well, we were close to the kitchen, I suppose, but it wasn’t that close. It wasn’t like you were getting hit by a swinging door or anything. It’s just, you know. Three random sets of people said, I don’t want to sit here. Yeah, and they laid down the law on the last one. But you have no idea why? No idea why. No idea. It seems a little strange, don’t you think? Well, no, because I don’t think I would have even noticed had my daughter not brought it to my attention. This may actually be what happens every time I go out to eat, and I just never pay attention to it. Yeah, right. It may just be the constant revolving door of people not wanting to sit next to me. I don’t know. I can’t remember that ever happening to us. Really? I’m surprised. I mean, I actually ate with you and wanted to move tables. Yeah. Well, that’s all right. Yeah. I’m like, maybe I’ll take my half of the garlic bread and go over there. I’m used to eating by myself. I don’t care. There’s a reason. Yeah. Yeah, the French toast stick reason. Well, yeah, there is that. So what’s going on with you, sir? No one wants to eat with me. Yeah. I don’t know how… This is like the Polish version of shallow hell, I guess, or something I’m going to go into. The Polish version of shallow hell? Yeah, I guess. I don’t… So, like… My wife was having some knee issues, and so… Oh, no. Horrible. We had to travel a little bit up to Des Moines and see, like, this specialist, and it’s kind of a… kind of a ho

Ozark Howler In this episode of Mondo Freako, host Bob LeMent welcomes Jeff Ponder to discuss his newly rebranded hockey show, Hockey Night in St. Louis, following a 15-year run with Let’s Go Blues Radio. Ponder shares insights into covering local and regional hockey, including unique segments dedicated to beer leagues and St. Louis natives playing across professional and collegiate circuits. The conversation then shifts into a deep dive on Missouri folklore as Ponder takes on a five-question trivia quiz about the legendary Ozark Howler, scoring a respectable 60% by relying on his knowledge of regional geography and history. Following the quiz, Bob and Jeff explore the origins and cultural impact of the Ozark Howler, debating whether the bear-sized, horned cryptid was originally dreamed up as a clever cover story by Prohibition-era moonshiners to deter trespassers. They also touch upon remote wilderness conservation, comparing regional legends to Bigfoot lore and the logistics of audio waveform analysis for cryptid calls. The episode concludes with details on where listeners can find Hockey Night in St. Louis across social media platforms and streaming channels, blending sports commentary with classic paranormal folklore. Pondcast Hockey Night in St. Louis https://youtube.com/live/_fdF4C25TnA UFO Witness Game (Click Graphic to Start) Transcript (AI transcription) Hey, Ponder, what’s shaking? Me. This music is getting me. Oh, my goodness. Mondo Freako. Hey everybody, welcome to Mondo Freako. I’ve got Jeff Ponder with me here from the podcast and the newly live, almost live St. Louis hockey tonight. Hockey night in St. Louis. I’m making a new name. Yes. You know what? That’ll be next season. We’ll change the name. Hockey night, St. Louis. I knew I looked at it actually like about 10 minutes ago. Yep. That’s all right. Of course, it did not stick. in my head, and i just made something up apparently. I apologize. Say it again now hockey night in st louis okay hockey night in st louis we cover all hockey and all of St. Louis. So, you know, we’ve even got a beer league segment really like me can be like, hey, people talked about me on a on a dinky little podcast. Really? I didn’t really Actually, I know some people who are in kind of the beer league hockey situation, besides yourself. So I will make sure I mention it. Hockey Night St. Louis. Hockey Night in St. Louis, yes. In St. Louis. I forgot the N. Is it just a letter N or is it I-N? I-N. It’s not like in and out. No, Hockey Night in St. Louis. In St. Louis. All right. That will be the third season. We’ll change it to that. All right. Well, and don’t forget the podcast. Jeff does a podcast. Been doing that for a while. The hockey stuff, you’ve done a variation and this is the new variation, I believe. Yes. So we did a let’s go blues radio. We did that for 15 years, over 550 episodes, which was insane that people actually wanted to hear me talk about sports that much. But yeah, we started this season. We kind of, Reformatted, so we decided to rebrand, and we are now hockey night in St. Louis, and as you mentioned, the podcast how you and i met uh conversations that go nowhere. You can find us on any of the social media, or i guess any of the podcasting platforms, and uh yes it’s literally random guest random topic, and we just talk about silly stuff, which uh it seems, Bob, like you’re kind of into that. I do love silly stuff, that’s for sure. Yep. Definitely. So here’s the podcast. What’s the social handle for podcast? It is podcastconvos. So it’s what you have there and then C-O-N-V-O-S. All together. All together now. Here we go. Podcastconvos. There you go. There it is. All right. Hey, what is it? You got a cactus or something popping up? I got a kitty right here. He’s very interested in what you have to say, Bobby. He sees the cartoon cat and he’s like, what is going on? What is happening? I’m like, hey, my friend. Well, this is Mondo Frico, but don’t forget to check out the podcast right here, here and there. And I’m going to ask you, do you want to do the quiz first or hear the story first? You know, we did the quiz first last time. Let’s do it again. Oh, you want to go with the quiz? Oh, yeah. Quiz. Quiz. Quiz. at the quiz this week is about the Ozark Howler. Have you heard of this? Can you see the questions on there? I’ve heard of it, but I’ll admit my memory is fuzzy if I have memory of it at all, but I know I’ve heard of the Ozark Howler. Well, we’ve got five questions for you here, and let’s see how you do. about the Ozark Howler. I figured we’d do something that was Missouri-centric because we’re both in the area. Yes. And here’s your first question of five. Let’s see how it goes. This is an easy question. Which unusual physical feature is most commonly attributed to the Ozark Howler in local folklore? Is it thick ram-like horns on his head, leathery bat wings on its back, a long scaly reptilian tail, or Or feathered talons on its front paws. What do you think? Or I got a hint if you want to take a hint. Let’s just go for it. I’m going to go with the feathered talons on its front paws. Feathered talons. Oh, man. Sorry. That buzzer is kind of harsh today. Witness accounts commonly describe the howler as a stocky, bear-sized feline sporting prominent horns. Interesting. Okay. Oh, boy. I’ve made it too big here. Okay. Next question, another easy question for you, number 205. You know, kind of a slow start, but that’s fine. You’ll be fine. You just got to get more than 50% to win here. I’ll get it. In what primary geographic region is the Ozark Howler said to roam? The Pine Barrens of southern New Jersey? The Plateau and Mountain region of Arkansas and Missouri? the deep bayous and swamps of southern Louisiana, or the high desert plateaus of northern Mexico? I have a hint. Well, I think I know this one. I’m going to guess by its name. I mean, it makes sense to be New Jersey. I’m kidding. Don’t quit. No, I’m going to go with the plateau and mountain region of Arkansas and Missouri. There you go. That’s right. The Ozark Haller is tied specifically to the Ozark Plateau. Go figure. Across Arkansas, Missouri, Oklahoma, and Kansas. Interesting. Well, I most know it from Missouri. Right. I don’t know how big the Ozarks are. I mean, it’s a big space. We may look that up here in a minute. All right. This is a hard question. Number three. So you got one right, one wrong. Going into question three. In the 1990s and early 2000s, who orchestrated elaborate hoaxes involving fake sightings and emails about the Ozark Howler? Was it Chad Arment, Lauren Coleman, Ivan T. Sanderson, or Ray Wallace? I have a hint if you want it. Let’s go with the hint. Cryptozoologist Lauren Coleman identified this trickster who flooded message boards with manufactured tails. Okay, so it’s got to be Lauren Coleman. I’m kidding. Sorry. I guess he didn’t say self-identified. Right. I think I got to go. My gut originally said Ivan T. Sanderson. So let’s go with it. Are you sure? Want to call a friend or anything? Sounds like I should be. Let’s go with it. Yes, let’s go with Ivan T. Sanders. Oh, no. Of course, it’s Chad. Chad Arment confessed to fabricating numerous accounts and sightings across Internet cryptozoology, zoological forums. Ivan T. Sanders is actually another cryptid explorer guy. He died a while back. Yes, his name was… with me. You never trust a Chad. Of course it’s Chad. Yeah, it’s always Chad. In every 80s movie ever, Chad is the jerk. That’s right. Anyone whose name is Charles but chooses to go by Chad is a terrible person. That’s right. It wasn’t Chad in charge. It was Charles in charge. That’s right. Everyone loved Charles. That’s right. Charles, good. Chad, bad. Lauren Coleman is also a rather renowned cryptozoological researcher. And Alina from Decatur, Illinois. Anyhow. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Next. Vocalization is a medium question. How do traditional legends describe the signature sound made by the Ozark howler? Is it a rhythmic clicking sound like a giant mechanical clock? B, a combination of a wolf’s howl and an elk’s bugle. Or C, a piercing whistle reminiscent of a runaway steam locomotive. Finally, D, a harsh screech echoing across between an owl and an elk. I do have a hint if you’d like it. Okay. Using deductive reasoning, if it’s called the Ozark Howler, I would think it’s going to be between B and D. Okay. And I will say I’m starting to kind of get a picture in my head of what this Ozark howler looks like. I would imagine it would look kind of like a wolf. So let’s go with the wolf’s howl and an elk’s bugle. Bugle. Okay, B. That’s right. Pales describes its vocalization as an eerie mix of an elk’s hollow bugle and a deep wolf howl. There you go. Nice. All right. Good deductive reasoning on your part there, Pounder. That’s what I do. Ponder. I said Pounder. I’m sorry. All right. Next. So you got two. Get this one right. You get over your 50% and you win. Bragging rights, I suppose. Ready? Medium question. Which famous frontiersman was rumored in early tall tales to have shot and encountered the Ozark Howler in Missouri or Missouri, depending on which part of the state you’re from. A. Davy Crockett. B, Daniel Boone? C, Jim Bridger? Or D, Kit Carson? I have a hint if you’d like it. Okay. So again, using deductive reasoning, there’s a lot of tales of Daniel Boone traveling through Missouri. So that’s what I’m thinking, but let’s use the hint. Oh, you’re going to go with the hint? Here we go. I’m going to go with the hint. He is renowned for his coonskin cap legend and settling along the Missouri River. That’s… Well, yeah, I’m going to go Daniel Boone. Yep. That’s right. Of course it’s Daniel Boone. Daniel Boone. Folk stories claim Daniel Boone encountered and shot t

Bob jets back from San Antonio and has a few interesting experiences, while Miles cuts to the front of the seniors’ line at the pharmacy. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/OcUuaUnMZ_A Static Radio – Pharmacy Walk Bob jets back from San Antonio and has a few interesting experiences, while Miles cuts to the front of the seniors’ line at the pharmacy. Pharmacy Walk Bad AI Transcript no sex no drugs no wine no women no one this is mine welcome to daddy does it sound like one of Marge’s sisters there yeah Thelma yeah Thelma Thelma Thelma and Thelma yeah Marge you got a good breakup with Homer. Divorce him. Yeah. Welcome, everybody, to the Miles title extravaganza. Welcome to my playhouse house. Miles is going to sing Rammstein for us this week. Take it away, Miles. Oh, sometimes the sausages in the playhouse. Tug, tug, tug, tug, tug, tug, tug, tug. very good. Right. Yeah. Love the ramstein i don’t i don’t know i don’t really listen. My son does i don’t seems a little bit too dark for me. So I don’t know if i don’t know i don’t know well i was uh in the city of Lights, oh, wait a minute, I wasn’t, I was in the city of uh the dead recently east st louis that’s right that’s right city of unmarked graves that’s east st louis yeah yeah city of no return yeah that’s right right right some people say. Oddly enough, though, a lot of the people they find are not from the area. They’re from other places across the river. Hmm. It’s kind of like having a wish sandwich. Mm-hmm. Bow, bow, bow, bow. No, I was down at San Antonio, Texas until just a few hours ago. Has anyone gone down to San Antonio? I’ve been telling everybody that I’m like, you know, the Phil Collins Alamo collection is available to view. What? Phil Collins has an Alamo collection? It’s crew t-shirts. Yeah, and he had all these artifacts he donated to the Alamo. Nobody believes me. They’re like, what? I don’t know. I still haven’t looked this up yet. I don’t know. I’m kind of skeptical here. You mentioned this off the air. I’m pretty skeptical on this. I’m like, oh, look it up. It’s there. It’s there. Yeah. So I was in the hottest hotel room I’ve been in in a long time. uh i mean you had like a lady of the night temperature wise i mean what temperature wise it’s like oh okay you didn’t okay you didn’t have like a lady boy or something with you there? okay Come on now and then i don’t know i don’t know what you do there so i was there and uh like the air conditioner couldn’t keep up in my room. It never got the lowest. I turned the thing all the way down, which maybe I shouldn’t have done that. But I mean, are you like me? Whenever I go, I travel, especially in the summertime. As soon as I get in my, my room, I turn the air conditioner all the way down. And then I dropped my pad. No. And then, you know, you go to dinner or whatever, you come back. It’s like crisp. It’s like you’re walking into a frozen wonderland. Right. Right, right. So I did that, and then I come back, and it’s like a sauna. A sauna. It’s a sauna. So then I suffered with the sauna for a few nights. I was there for almost a week. Yeah. And then, like, on the third night, somebody I was with were like, hey, I saw people getting fans on my floor, like box tickets. And I’m like, what? No, they’re fans of Phil Collins. Genesis. So I immediately called the desk and asked for a fan. I got one. I got a box fan. It was mildly better. At least the hot air was moving around a little more. But I have not had that kind of experience. Now, this hotel was supposedly haunted. I did not have any haunted experiences, though. You didn’t bring your equipment with you? I always bring my equipment, Miles. Oh, you mean my ghost hunting equipment? No, I’m not your dick. Yeah, no, I know. I’m just joking. No, I did not, because I heard it. I vaguely heard it was haunted, and as we were going from the airport into the hotel, our Uber driver was regaling us with the haunted stories from the hotel. Hey, man. No, she was a very nice lady, and we stayed at the Menger Hotel, which is a weird name, but Menger, which is like a really, really old hotel right next door to the Alamo. Oh, okay. You know, you could spit on the Alamo from the distance we were. Oh, nice. Yeah, exactly. If you really want to be a jerk. Yeah, well, you excel at that. So, yeah, we were right next to the Alamo and right across the street from the Crockett Hotel, which is another old, old hotel. Yeah. And I had dinner there one night, so… So you threw your weight around like, excuse me, I don’t know if you know who I am, but I like a fan. I need a fan. That oscillates. Why do I sound like the family guy? Huh? You sound like the family guy. You sound like your Chief Wiggum. Oh, I’m Chief Wiggum, all right. No, so I got a fan, which was really, it cut the, you know, because the lowest my room got was 73. And it’s like 90, you know, like 100 degrees outside. That’s not acceptable for me. And I wouldn’t even look at the thermostat after a while because it was so hot in there, like in the upper 70s. Yeah. But, you know, whatever. You’re going to be all right? Yeah, I’ll be all right. But it was an interesting old hotel, lots of cool stuff. But apparently there was some Sally, somebody who haunts the hotel. But I did not see anything. I was too busy upskirting in the lobby. I was too busy. I was there for work. Yeah, you always play that card. I didn’t go out. I was there for work. I didn’t do nothing. I’m the boss. I did go out to dinner on Saturday night. Oh, here we go. Salad. The salad rundown. Here we go. Salad rundown. Okay. Well, you’re always bragging about your salad intake, so I’m waiting for it. I didn’t eat salad on Saturday. Really? It was some type of crazy Mexican lasagna or something. I don’t know what it was. I didn’t. like it too much. Mexican lasagna. That’s what see well that’s the only way i could describe it. Okay. It was like had chicken and cheese and, uh, all your okay so what other stuff some kind of stuff in there. I don’t know. So, uh, I was on my, I walked because it’s about i don’t So I was walking back and got to see all the good nightlife of San Antonio. Oh, okay. Like this one poor guy throwing up, leaning up against the building. It was a good one. Was it your brother? No, it wasn’t. It was not your brother. It was some random guy. He was like… Wait, what did you have? The Mexican lasagna. It was like 1130, something like that. I got really late for me and made my way back. And there was a couple of Puerto Rican girls who were dying to meet me. They seemed to be looking for a good time or something. Somebody to have a good time. But there is… Okay, go ahead. Go ahead. There was quite the unhoused situation down there. But I’ll tell you, now, you know, there’s one thing that I cannot stand. Oh, here we go. Well, no, there’s more than one thing. There’s one thing in this story that I cannot stand. And that’s panhandling. But all of the unhoused individuals, as the proper way to say it now, nobody panhandled me at all. But they all seem to be very hot. Like overwhelmingly hot sitting outside. It’s too hot to panhandle. Yeah, it’s so hot. How hot is it? It’s too hot to panhandle. San Antonio is too hot to panhandle. Right. Even on the Riverwalk with the people who were hiding underneath the bridges that didn’t get shooed away by the police did not panhandle. Too hot, man. Like, eh. Which I found rather intriguing, considering. I get peed almost everywhere else I go. Because I thought you were a woman. Like, I don’t want any boob money, you know? I don’t want any sweaty titty money. Yeah, we don’t want that. So we’re not going to… Here’s a dollar. Liz Ugly Broad. Liz Ugly Broad. She ain’t got no money. So yesterday evening on Sunday… The people that I was with, they wanted to do the little boat ride. Yeah. And so we did do that. And it was so sad. It was probably the saddest boat ride I’ve ever been on. You know, most of the time when you go on a boat, it’s a joyous occasion. Okay. I’ve been on many boats. And every time people are smiling, it’s a fun situation. Yeah. Right? Love something exciting and new. So our guide was Sisto. Let me, uh, Cisco. I’m sorry. Sisto is different. Okay. Was he a friend of yours? No, he wasn’t a friend of mine. Cisco friend, friend, friend of mine. And Cisco was our guide. And we somehow, there was three of us all together. We somehow snuck on in front of a bunch of other people. Oh, nice. They line up to get on the boat, right? They fill up the boat. Yeah. Like, is there a group of three? And the first one of the people I was with was like, yes, we have three. And then we got to walk past all of these people who were really mad and get on that boat. Oh, I believe this. I 100% believe this. And then Sisto led us on. And he was really quite a good guy. So if you’re down the Riverwalk, ask for Sisto. He’s a good guy. But the boat was dead. It was a dead boat. Like all these hundred-year-old people there or something like that? No, it was young people. I mean, there was old people, but there was young people. And we were sitting back there laughing, and he was telling corny jokes and stuff. But I thought he was very clever, and he had a whole routine that he was doing. All these people, silence. Silence. They’re on their tablets. Probably boring. And I’m like, God, I’m like this poor system. I gave him, I actually gave him a $5 tip. Wow. That you found. No, I didn’t find. Yeah. You probably found it. Yeah. Wow. Five bucks. Wow. Dang cash money. Mark this day down. Mark this day down, man. This guy’s, I thought he

Miles enjoys his BK breakfast a little too much, while Bob deals with a hungover repairman. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/9_Q9VSVkKF0 Miles enjoys his BK breakfast a little too much, while Bob deals with a hungover repairman. Sticky Nyet Bad AI Transcript It’s on. It’s on. It’s on. Hey, you shaved your bush. Hey everyone. This is miles. Thanks for noticing. Thanks. Yeah. It’s always nice to get compliments. Yeah. On the topiary. Yeah. Thanks for showing me. It’s like a bonsai tree. Yeah. Kind of sparse. Yeah. Who says stuff like that? I mean, do you say this in your regular life? No, it’s just a trend that was going on about a month ago. Oh, okay. It’s women, like women talking to women, but they’re using like different inflections. Like you’re mad and you’re surprised and then you’re angry and happy. You know, it’s like, Oh, what is the, what is your fascination with the tech talk? um you know, I’ve not been banned from tick tock before unlike Facebook. I like them. They don’t ban me. Yeah. You know, I just, I’ve like twice now been like in the naughty chair, you know? Yeah. That’s why i don’t really post it on there anymore. The naughty chair I thought you would love to be in the naughty chair. It seems like a place you like to be. I don’t like to be muted like that, no. You can’t silence me. I can say whatever I want. Pull this phone out of my pocket. I’m going over to TikTok where I can say any goddamn thing I want. That’s right. Yeah. Oh, that’s nice. I say let’s murder the Etruscans, and I mean it. a little harsh they’ll kill all of their trust in yourself oh my goodness. Yeah. Anyhow. Yeah. So, uh, well, I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself over on the tick tock i do. I can find like-minded people to hang out with except the live tick tock people they are so boring. Oh, really? People with nothing to do, just sitting there watching their monitors. No, I won’t get naked. No, these are my real tattoos. Miles, quit putting your chats in. I don’t want to read them anymore. I’m going to block you, Miles. Don’t block me. It’s my first fear. I will be silenced. Yeah, right? Yeah. Anyway. any news? I can’t believe you sit and watch that stuff. Oh my gosh. I know. I have no, you wonder you you complain to me like how come you have so much time to make all those goddamn cartoons? And it’s like, well, because i’m not sitting aimlessly watching people. All right. I have a little bit of a thing now with this anyway, because i forget what the name of the picture is, but the, The naked girl in the clamshell, the giant clamshell. I’m in the clamshell nude, like, covering up my whatever. And you’re, like, totally shocked. Yeah. I thought that was funny. I didn’t even read what the captions said. I’m like, I’m not reading this. This is so weird. This is getting so, you know. I went through a phase where I was, like, taking famous artworks and putting our little characters in them. Yeah. Like there’s a good one of Nighthawks, you know, in the diner. That’s a good one. I’m the girl with the pearl earring in one of them. You’re out playing and I’m the girl with the pearl earring. That was a good one. Yeah, I’ve tried hard to be this guy’s friend over the years. It’s not been easy. But I thought, oh, I can’t remember what the name of that was. It’s Venus. I only have like three or four friends left in this world. Unfortunately, this is one of them. Yeah. I’ve tried so hard. I’ll do something else. You want me to do like dogs playing poker or something? No, you’ll probably have me bent over the table or something. I have done nothing inappropriate with your avatar. Me nude in a clamshell covering myself. It’s a classic piece of art. I don’t want to be in it. It’s not you. It’s the snowman. That’s me, yeah. That’s the character of me, yeah. Okay. I can take the picture you have here and put it in there if you want. It’s creepy and disturbing, okay? It’s creepy and disturbing. Oh, come on. You’d be surprised how, you know, you always are on TikTok. You know where I’m at. Yeah, I think I do know where I’m at. I’m on Insta, and they love it over on the Instagram, on the gram. Yeah, no one likes these pictures. Like, nobody. There’s, like, no likes to these pictures at all. Zero. Zero. Every day. It doesn’t mean it’s good, you know? I’m not saying it’s good. I’m just saying it’s there. Because you can doesn’t mean you should. You know what I’m saying? Oh, okay. Okay, let me just give you some tough love. Okay, yes, okay. Let your old Uncle Miles tell you. Yeah, okay. Well, I’m just having fun, and I’m not sitting around mindlessly staring at TikTok. If we agreed on everything, then it would be a boring show. We can’t agree on everything. Yeah, that’s true. Which forms we like and don’t like. Yeah, I don’t know what your hang-up is. It’s just classic artworks. I’m trying to think of other ones. What’s that one with John the Baptist or something? Can you do that? Were you holding the head? Yeah, put my head on. Do that one. I don’t think I want to do that. I don’t want to get into the religious stuff. I have my eyes like X’s. I’m dead. I don’t want to get into religious things. I did actually make one of us in the Sistine Chapel. Did you see that one? As much as I try to avoid it, I’m like… I tried. I can’t even. Well, I’m going to go in a new direction. I don’t know. Maybe I’ll only do Remington pieces from now on. You’re probably like Mapplethorpe or something. Oh, come on now. Now you gave me an idea. Oh, I’m sure you already thought of it. You shouldn’t have mentioned that. It’s so creepy. Even Ted Bundy would be like, God damn. Shit. Well, I’m sorry I’m offending you with our works of art that I’m placing us in. It’s a little weird. It’s a little weird. I don’t know. I think it’s fun. Okay. Speaking of fun, I had some fun over the weekend. Yeah. Or maybe not. So… For reasons that I will not go into, we still have a satellite dish. here at the house. Not one of those big old-time ones. No, no, no. A new, you know, the small one. The small one, yeah, yeah. And something went wrong with it. And unfortunately, something, you know, well, you know how much I hate people coming to the house. Yes, on a scale of 1 to 10. It’s like at least 11 or 12. Yeah, yeah. and so because it wasn’t working right and and couldn’t get it figured out, I had to have them over. Yeah. Which the weird thing was, is we had to wait like a week or something before they came out, which i thought was odd. And then the second odd thing was they came on a sunday Which I’m like, at this point in time, there’s no day of relaxation for anyone. We get packages on Sunday. Amazon will stop by the house on Sunday two, three times sometimes to drop off trinkets. And then now the satellite guy stops by on Sunday. I’m like, what kind of world are we living in? They probably had to fly him in from, like, Ukraine or something. He’s like, all right. You say that, which is funny. Because he was Russian. I knew it. I knew it. So I’m, like, working. I get up in the morning. It’s been godly hot around these parts. So I get up early, and I’m out working in the yard. And this guy, you know, they have a window. show up and it is in the morning. So they’re going to show up sometime before lunch and i’m like well i’m gonna go do some stuff whenever they pull that i’ll you know, stop that and go, you know, do, do my due diligence as the man of the house and, uh, you know, show this guy around or what happened. And, um, so I’m, you know, doing my work and then, and then, i’m I’m mowing some grass and, uh, I’m like, I mean, it’s Sunday. I’m like thinking about this, right? I’m like, God, it’s Sunday. I can’t believe they’re coming on a Sunday. I got nothing to do when I’m mowing the grass, but think about, you know, putting you in a clamshell and, and, uh, you know, and I’m like Sunday, I go, I hope this guy isn’t hung over, you know, what’s that? What is this? Decatur? Yeah. What is this? I did actually, I saw, not on TikTok, but I saw a reel where somebody was listing the 10 worst cities in Illinois, and Decatur was like number five. Right before Danville, I think. Danville was on the list as well. I watched the whole list anyway. Oh, I know. I’ve seen this list before. Aurora was on it too, by the way. Yeah, I know. So, but anyway. I digress. So I’m waiting for this guy to show up. I’m like, gosh, what if he’s hung over? And so then I finished the front yard where I can see people coming and going. So I stopped because I’m like, if I go in the backyard, everybody’s going to be mad at me for not paying attention because I can’t see the driveway and everything. So I’m like, I’ll just go and get something to drink and hang out because he’s supposed to be there. And so… I go in for a few minutes, and then he shows up. And I open the front door, and this guy, I swear to God, he really looked like he was struggling. I want to work on your computer. Exactly. He sounded like Chekhov or whatever. he’s like, uh, the dish and i go yeah yeah and so uh i you know show him okay uh where is uh you know and i go it’s out here. So I’ll take him outside. And I mean, this guy looks like he’s, you know, had about two hours of sleep. This guy’s case in your house. Yeah. Well, No, actually, I don’t think so. He turned out to be a really, really nice guy, but he, you know, I think he overdid it, you know, Saturday. Yeah. And so then, you know, we go outside and I don’t have the dish on the roof anymore. I had it on the

Bob meets his friends for lunch and gets the worst lunch pitch ever, while Miles has a very non-conversational chiropractor visit. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here – https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/CPj_fLbu5xo Bob meets his friends for lunch and gets the worst lunch pitch ever, while Miles has a very non-conversational chiropractor visit. Back Crackers Bad AI Transcript Like a measuring cup? Mm-hmm. Are you measuring what you’re eating, or is it just convenient? I just like to measure it. I’m measuring things. Mm-hmm. I’m sorry. organizations. Go ahead, Jones. Blow it back to God. Hey everyone, this is Miles. I thought maybe you’d sing the Honeycomb song again. No. Oh, okay. I’m going to have a little bit of cereal tonight. Yeah, I was… What was your dinner? What did you have for dinner? Chicken strips. I had some chicken strips. You created a monster, Chick-fil-A. Oh, my God. This guy, I swear to God, he spends like half his paycheck on fast food these days. I’ll just have to get some of that homemade lemonade as well. Yeah. And a cookie for $1.50. Didn’t you used to eat out quite a bit? I still do from time to time, but yeah. But there’s another issue where I have to travel, and so I’m forced to eat out. I can’t take a kitchen with me. Really? I just can have protein shakes, I guess. I could just take a bunch of Slim Fast or… under your chins. Oh my gosh. You shouldn’t really be eating this late, honestly. I like to do things that you disapprove of. Well, you’re doing a good job. See, like, I don’t work for you. Like, these stupid people have to work under you all the time. They have to kiss your ass. Like, yes, Mr. Lamont. I mean, I’m like, f**k, you don’t own me, dude. You know, f**k it. If I want to eat at 930 some super sugar crisps, I will. At 930, MFR. And if you don’t like it. Whatever I want. I shop after 7 p.m., which you don’t like. You can do that. It’s like, why? Why are you doing this to yourself? I enjoy it. I like to go shopping. I think of funny stuff. When I drive around by myself, I think of funny stuff. Well, that’s good. Yeah, it’s like creative for me. Well, that’s fantastic. I can appreciate that. I mean, it’s not really funny, but I mean, you know, I think it’s funny. I’m laughing at the grocery store. Yeah. That’s me. Buy some sugar smacks. I pulled a muscle laughing in the grocery store. That’s right. Like that schnooks. I pulled a muscle in the dairy aisle. Ha ha ha! All these cheese jokes came into my mind. You see, you see. Jello pudding. Oh, my Lord. Yeah. I’m just. Hey, you know, I was going to tell you here. You are, you know, a trendsetter. I’ve been told. Go on. Who told you that? My mom. Oh, okay. Yeah. Those tough skins are going to make you a trendsetter at school. Really? You don’t need Levi’s. You need Cavaricci. Tough skins. No, I went to lunch with some friends of mine. Oh, this guy with the lunch in front. Geez. I love to go to lunch with friends. This is so… I’m just jealous I have no friends. That’s why I’m so jealous. You’re not going to go to lunch with friends. I think I’ll invite my invisible friends and they won’t even go. I’m like, God damn it. So, Hefe met me for lunch and another friend, Erk. And the funny thing is we all came from different directions. So, we met in the middle because Hefe lives close to me, but Erk doesn’t. And So he came south, I came north, and then Jefe was screwing around out west, and so then he came east. And we all met for a lunch in a little town. Mm-hmm. Ferguson? What’s that? Ferguson? No. Ferguson? No, it wasn’t Ferguson. No, it wasn’t Ferguson. Go ahead. Go ahead. Not Ferguson, no. I mean, a little, you know, like farmer town kind of place. Oh, I see. And a bump in the road, as it were. But it was on Labor Day. Oh, fancy. And so we’re like, let’s go to the cafe. And it was closed. And then let’s go to the pizza place. It was closed. So we’re in this little town trying to find some place that’s open on Labor Day. It was kind of a tough thing. But while… We were waiting for Hefe because he’s kind of late. We were at the pizza place waiting for him. And this guy comes walking. We were just sitting outside. They were closed. And they have a bench outside. So we sat down on the bench and we’re just chatting, waiting for Hefe to show up. And… This guy from over at a body shop or something, some kind of mechanic thing, right? He’s wearing the shirt with his name on it, and he’s all dirty looking. He’s obviously a very hardworking man compared to myself. Yeah. Who’s just sitting on this bench wishing that pizza was open. Yeah. around lunchtime. Uh, Hefe is, uh, violating one of your rules of being late. Oh, Hefe is always late. I don’t know what it is about me and my friends who are always late. You, you have like certain strong likes and dislikes. I’m just telling the audience this, whoever might be listening, but, uh, this is one of them you you have to be you have to be early 10 minutes early. If you’re going to meet this nitwit, make it 10 minutes early. We continue on. Hefe’s always late. It’s only gotten worse since he’s semi-retired. He’s out of the game, man. He’s like, I don’t care. I want to show up whenever I want to. He’s kind of like that before. We’re sitting there and this guy from the… I don’t know, auto place over there. It crosses the street. Wow. He’s making a beeline for us, and I’m sitting there, and I’m like, I wonder what’s going to happen now. Are you the male prostitutes I ordered? Yeah. I don’t know if that was the case. Are you Irk and Bob? Yeah, a little small town kind of thing. And Hefe drives in at the same time. And it was, you know, kind of like everybody was meeting, you know, all meeting out in the desert or something. And… Yeah. It’s like the good and bad and the ugly at the end. Exactly. Blondie. Hey, Blondie. Blondie, Blondie. Shoot, shoot. So Hefe’s… pulling in this guy’s crossing the street. Me and eric are sitting there chatting and i’m kind of keeping an eye on this guy, you know, trying to figure out what the hell’s gonna happen yeah like are we in his favorite spot or something? Is it break time? Is it smoking time? I don’t know what’s going on. Bob does like strangers either. Oh no. Yes. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I had, yeah, I’m, you know, I’m the situation I’m sizing up the situation, deciding what needs to happen. Your bingo card is filling up quickly. I can tell on this adventure. And so, uh, so he gets over clay. He doesn’t come too close. Thank goodness. He, he did, uh, you know, I live my life like a celebrity. You can’t come within certain amount of feet from me. Right. Yes. This is true. This is all 100% true. I like to have a good distance between me and the regular folk. This is true. Even though I’m not a celebrity per se, I do like to live my life as if I am one. And you should know not to look at me, not to talk to me. Correct. And be more than two arms length away from me at all times. No hugging. No hugging. Yeah. No kissing. Yeah. none of that stuff. So he does keep a good distance and he stops. He’s like, Hey, guys, did you know that the pizza place was closed? Newsflash? Yeah, newsflash. And I’m like, Yeah, pretty, we’re aware of that. And he’s like, Oh, I wasn’t sure if you thought maybe somebody was coming to open it up. And I’m like, No, they got a sign. And I go, we’re just waiting on our friend. And at the time he just pulled in and he was getting out of his truck, walking towards us. I go, we’re just waiting for a friend here. And he’s like, well, this was like the most awkward sales pitch I’ve ever been heard. Sounds like a Rolling Stones song. So he’s like, well, he kind of looks around and, I don’t know what’s going to happen. My wife, and again, not sure where this is going, has opened this bowl place downtown. I’m like, bowl place? I didn’t say anything, but I’m like, what is a bowl place? Like a haircut? No, like you get a bowl and you put some rice and some chicken in it. Oh, he’s the… Uh, hype man for the, yeah well, he was the most awkward hype man i’ve ever seen. This is closed. You go downtown. Well, I’ve got a bowl shop. Like having goober pile. Tell me about a bowl shop surprise surprise surprise that’s gomer i’m talking about Cooper. Oh, sorry. I don’t know what i go ahead. That’s that predates me. I don’t know. I’m like, huh? He’s kind of kicking the dirt and looking around. Yes, you got it. Hands in his pockets. Shucks. Shucks. You got it. hype man. And I’m like, huh? You know, I’m still trying to figure this out. Yeah. Yeah, the bowl you know. And then, you know, Jefe walks up and he does, Jefe dismisses everybody. Yeah. He’s like, looking at the guy like, what the hell is he talking about you know I mean, yeah. Hefe does not care about anybody in the vicinity most of the time. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. And so, so yeah. And the guy’s like, go on. She’s open up now. And I’m like, and Eric is just, I don’t think anything. He’s just like looking at him and I’m like, And out of the three of us, to be honest with you, Erk is the most worldly person. He’s been all over the world because he was in the military, so he made him go all over the world. And it was a little forced world tour he had to go on there. I think he’s probably got sealed carry, so he’s not the least bit scared. He’s like, mm-hmm. Well, yeah, that’s yeah. No, I, I bet. No, I bet you right now. The two of the three people probably had uh weapons within reach yeah and i’m not one of them. So yeah, I don’t want to see a weapon yeah so yeah they they had no, uh, qualms abou

This Week On this episode of LeMent Tonight, host Bob LeMent welcomes Las Vegas comedian, bartender, and street musician Steve K. for a candid, wide-ranging conversation on navigating the comedy world. Steve opens with a self-deprecating monologue touching on getting older, the indignities of open mics, and feeling like an outsider in entertainment. The discussion quickly pivots into an honest dive into Steve’s 20-year obsession with stand-up, where Bob challenges Steve’s tendency to get trapped in his own head and hyper-focus on local scene politics. Offering tough-love mentorship, Bob encourages him to stop obsessing over peer validation, lean into his unique raw perspective much like Rodney Dangerfield did, and measure success by the creative act rather than the pursuit of fame. @tomedy601 https://youtube.com/live/0EaFjA6ayF4 Bad AI Transcript Hey, everybody, it’s Lament Tonight. I’ve got my special guest tonight, Steve K. Steve comes from Las Vegas, Nevada. he’s an eligible bachelor there in las Vegas. he uh part-time uh drag queen, full-time bartender, I think, right? So, let me read you a quick bio that he has here. He’s a comedian who just does not feel like he fits into the comedy scene. Isn’t that all comedian Steve? But I cannot stop thinking about doing comedy. So, here i am. Maybe I can feel part of a community here. That’s his plausible bio. Steve K. from Vegas. How’s it going, Steve? Um, well, thank you, Bob. Thank you for having me and hello to all your listeners out there. Well, I was gonna you can do a little monologue here if you’d like. I’ll just kick it over to you. Oh, I feel like we’re on the Jimmy Fallon show or Jimmy Killen. I get to go out on the stage. Yeah. Where’s the band? Well, here, hold on a second. Let’s see. Gary, are you there? And that’s what she said. Oh, yeah, that’s true. Bob, you are a great a*****e. Thank you, Gary. All right. Go ahead, Steve. Okay, I’m just going to read some crap to you guys. I’m reading right off a piece of paper. I can afford to do that here because you can’t see me and my glasses. I just want you to know that I am competing very hard for my next gig. as a shopping cart attendant. I believe I got what it takes. I won’t let anything or anyone stand in my way. Not even my comedy career. I really feel I got this. And between the busting music on the street and DoorDash, I won’t need to work anywhere else and I can focus more on my open mic career. There we go. Hey, thank you. Give me the light. In comedy, we have the light, Bob. So give me the light when my time’s up, all right? Oh, I’ll just, I’ll give you the hook, but go right ahead. Yeah, give me the hook. You know, they used to say when we were young, don’t trust anyone over 30. Now it’s the opposite. We’re being erased. Okay, look at a magazine, 40 successful people under 40. Every time there’s an acting gig, they don’t want us. The jobs I work, young people ride around in golf carts, three, four of them, or they’re hiding and they come around to make sure that I’m not leaning up against the wall. In speed dating, all the groups of 25 to 35, 35 to 42, you don’t have anything really above 42. Maybe incorporate a 55 plus island but we will be the final generation. I know, don’t laugh at your own words. Thank you. Some foods know not to enter my mouth because my body is like the Hotel California. You can check in anytime you want, but it can never leave. It takes me two days to shit out a slice of pizza. Passing gas is your body’s way of saying, hey, I got food trapped inside of me. Sometimes I feel like a rocket ship that keeps trying to take off, but it can’t, so it keeps shooting out flames. Never ask a woman… Thank you, Bob. Thank you for the mercy laugh, the mercy symbols. Two more jokes and you’ll be out of your misery, everybody. Never ask a woman her age. We should all know that by now. It’s written somewhere. in the Ten Commandments, but it’s a double standard. Just like it’s okay for a woman to clean a men’s room when men are urinating. Recently, a woman bluntly asked me how old I was. I told her the truth. She replied, still kicking it. Huh? As she looked me up and down, I said, stop sizing me up. What the hell does that mean, still kicking it? anyway you haven’t you haven’t kicked a bucket yet? You haven’t kicked over? Yeah, but i i’m still kicking it. I’m kicking it hard. Thank you. When I was a child, they were tearing up the woods. So I tried putting up uh flyers oh they’re tearing up the woods, right? And every time they’re tearing up the woods, I thought, wow, you know, new kids are gonna move in and i’m gonna make some new friends because i didn’t have any friends. That’s why i was riding my bicycle around in the woods, right? Well, these kids, they would not be friends with me. They were rich kids. They became friends with the popular kids. So then not only did I not have any friends, but I didn’t have any more woods to ride through. So I tried putting up flyers, like for a flag football league. Nobody showed up. You know, this is before the internet. I don’t know. Oh, oh, wait, one more thing and I’ll stop, all right? Well, I’m going to bring it up. I’m going to turn it around, okay? I got an email from Plausible. Anybody, you should all join Plausible because you’ll get it on the email list. You can participate in, like, workshops and comedy. And they sent out emails. Who’s on your comedy team? And I had to think about it. Nobody but me. If I were in a bubblegum shrimp boat… Not even Lieutenant Dan without his legs would come join me. I try to start an open mic here. Applause will go to Forrest and friends. I get everybody one day notice. I sat there for one hour. Nobody’s sure. This is my career in a nutshell. I will hand it back to you, Bob. Thank you. Oh, okay. Let me give you some applause there. Well, I was wondering at one point there during your monologue if we weren’t going to be starting a support group here. Well, that’s what it is. Comedy is a support group. I’m not going to lie. It’s just something I do. I think you’ve got a couple of different divergent support groups going. You have the constipation support group and then also the comedy slash support group. So maybe you can combine the two. Why not? I mean, I try to start an open mic implausible, but apparently I’m not cool here. I’m not popular. Well, nobody is. You know how it goes, Steve. I know. I try not to take it personally. I’m trying to find a funny in it, Bob. You’d be on TikTok if you were really popular. I’ve been on TikTok. It’s a horrible app. That’s where Miles is right now. Miles Title, my co-host for Static Radio. He’s over on TikTok right now. I guarantee it. We won’t touch him, will we? Oh, no, I judge him constantly. Totally judge him. All right. Well, let’s not talk about him. Let’s talk about you, Steve. So you’ve been doing comedy for how long now? I started in 2006. Really? 2006? And what was the catalyst to do this? Well, I was always a writer from a time I was 12. But I went on a website for a local comedy club where I lived. And it was like a little ad site. comedy classes. You too can become a comedian. I think it was $250 for the class. Now, I never thought about how do you become a comedian. I like some comedy. I’m like, wow, you could take a class and you could actually do comedy. I never thought about it. Wow, I’m going to take this class. I made up my mind when I saw that ad. I was 39 years old and I took the class. And ever since then, I quit many times. I walked away, but I’ve been obsessed. I’ve been obsessed with comedy for the last 20 years. Interesting. But it sounds like, I mean, is comedy… It’s not doing it for you. You have all these kind of, you know, bad experiences. Because of me. I have to take accountability for what I did. What were you doing? I’m just like a piece of wood that needed to be sanded down. I was rough around the edges. I’m the guy… who goes from one extreme to the other, who doesn’t talk much or talks your ear off, who doesn’t know how to make things, who’s too real maybe, too open about himself. There’s too much for people to handle. Gotcha. Well, that’s a good question. So you thought that maybe you were touching on subjects that people were uncomfortable with? Uh, yeah, I, I believe it wasn’t funny. And, and, uh, you know, I’ve been told many times, this is not your therapy session, Steven. You have to talk about things that people can relate to it. That’s part of my problem. I have to, I have to let go of my narcissism and, you know, make it about other people. That’s how you get people to like you. That’s why I’m so alone. You know, I’m, I’m too self involved. Well, how can you get out of your head? That’s what you always got to do. You got to get out of your head, you know? Have you tried anything else? I mean, you took a comedy class. So, I mean, you showed some initiative to do something, right? That you thought, oh, this will be interesting. I like comedy. I want to do this, right? And now you’ve just told me one of the issues that you’re having. So why haven’t you attacked that issue the way you attacked the comedy thing? I think I finally found the formula. It took 20 years because I mean, I told you I’ve been going to open mics on and off, and I was the awkward, clumsy kid who couldn’t fit in at these mics. I always made maybe one or two friends, or I would get paranoid. I thought I was too popular, and I would just disappear and hide for two years. And in comedy, when you disappear, when you stop coming around, it’s like you’re erased when you come back. You know, nobody knows you. You’re a couple years older, too, and people don’t like old people. So that’s, you know, I’m just… I… Now, why do y

Miles plumbs around and finds out at the local big-box hardware store, while Bob is trying to figure out what Miles is up to. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here - https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ _ultp_btn_ic_right_circle_line_ultp_btn_ic_end_Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KybzZT8qwn4 Miles plumbs around and find out at the local big-box hardware store, while Bob is trying to figure out what Miles it up to. Bad AI Transcript Whoa, balloon. Hello? Hey, I got one black, one white, one black, one white, one black, and one white picture of you. You're going to go ahead and catch your breath. Yeah, that was... I was writing this song in my head yesterday. Man, I got to get my friend Smidge to do the guitar for me. It's very upbeat. Your friend Smidge, who you ignore until you want something? Oh, Pot, Cone, Kettle, Black... And Miles... Hey, Miles, you got a truck? You got something for me? Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. I thought it was funny. Yeah, I guess so. Is that the whole song or you got more to it? It's going to be along those lines. I mean, you know, I'm going to sing about my dog too, you know. Okay. I saw it originally. I was singing about my dog. So I got one black and one brown and one black and brown and one black and one brown.Or your country classic, I'm nothing but my dog's bitch. I'm nothing but my dog's bitch. Yeah. i'm glad i could be of service. I'm glad i could be of service. For scratching your itch i'm nothing but my dog. I'm just gonna be on the b side of my song. Sounds a lot like a rapid rod. Yeah. So static radio smiles. Oh, you're here. Okay. Yeah. I just, I'm writing movies. I write songs. I'm very creative. Yeah. You're very, you're well, I like to think of different scenarios to put myself in just for fun. So you write a lot of porno movies? Is that what you're saying? In my head? Yes. No. No, come on. And I'm going to go into the Hallmark store. Frank! No, Frank! Gretchen. Frank from Blue Velvet? They're going to have the new2026 ornaments. Yeah. Yeah. Well, anyway, that's it. Interesting. No, you're a very creative guy. You don't have a very good record of getting things actually done, but you think of a lot of things. If I can just impose on people and get them to do the work, then... Yeah, well, yeah, then that's your... You know, I'm an idea guy, Chuck. I'm the idea guy, yeah. Yeah, okay. I'm the Tom Holtz of parenthood, you know. Yeah, that's probably for sure. That is for sure, yeah. Everyone's going to have to Google this whole show and be like, I don't know what the hell he's talking about. The reference thing, like movies that are like 100 years old. Night Shift? What do you mean? Who's the Fonz? He's still on TV. He's on Hazardous History or something like that. Oh, that guy works a lot. Yeah.Nowadays, he does. Yeah, he does. Henry Winkler. The Wink. The Wink Man, yeah. Well, you had a story. I don't really have a story this week. I can't think of anything. I mean, I could talk about you making fun of me. That's about it right now. You know, I don't know. Yeah. So you said you had a big story today, and then you did not like my response. You're going up on story. Yeah, this jabroni reminds me that we're recording tonight, which I had forgotten. Yeah, well, every time there's a holiday. I do. It screws me up, man. It's like me. I'm like one day behind. Your work doesn't call you and go, are you going to show up? Miles, now get down here. We had a three-day weekend. I thought I didn't work anymore. Yeah, get down here, Miles.Somebody's got to make the donuts, Miles. Another old reference. Thank you. Everyone's going to be lost in this. I went to a big box store for my plumbing needs. What kind of plumbing needs did you have? I got like a leaky shower thing going on. And it's been going on. Is it leaking in the shower or outside the shower? No, in the shower. Like the faucet part is like... To me, that is... If I was going to channel Miles' title, I would say that's taking care of itself because there's a drain right there. Everything is working. Yeah, it's perfect. Why do I need to deal with it? Because it's working still. After about two weeks of this, I'm like, I better fix this. And a water bill that went through the roof. Yeah, I know. Because I just paid the water bill and it was like 20 bucks higher. I'm like, what the f**k? Everyone is showering all day while this leak is happening. I haven't showered for a week because of the leak. And I went to the first big box store, which...know it's like a huge store, but there's only like four people that work there. So there's like no help, you know, like, okay, well this well then just go to YouTube. That's what i do. Well, I had to get the part and stuff. I had to figure out what i had to get. I I'm old school. I go to places okay no problem and uh so i went to the second box store because, uh, my, Like, my oldest son's best friend works there i'm like oh hey yeah you know, Big Dave will help me out, you know. Well, what's up, Miles? I heard you got a leaky flower. Even though it's the wrong department, you know, I always bug this guy anyway he's like i all i do is water the flowers. That's it. That's all i do. I just get the carts. Why do you insist on asking me these stupid, like, this makes up the answer. That's why i'm out here. I don't know i was like,I don't know. I'll three. I don't know. F**k. I don't know. I've never, I didn't even, I only, I just walked through. I go to the break room. That's it. I take a crap. I come back out. I get the cards and water the shit. And yeah, that's it. And, uh, I realized early on the big Dave is not at work. I'm like, Oh, so I went to the actual department by myself. Like a big boy. Big boy. And I found the desk that the help should have been at. And it was unoccupied. Of course. And it says, today's crew members for your needs will be Christy and Susie or something like that. like oh that sounds nice. You know, it's probably too, you know, young lady. Very efficient, uh, licensed plumbers yeah yeah i'm like i'm like i don't care. You know, anybody could work here. I don't care. I don't want to talk to no broad plumber. And I, uh, no, I did not play that card, but anyway, I, uh,I cannot find anyone in this department. So I go to the next department and there's like, dude, it looks like a very young Santana working there. Hey, Santana. I go, Hey, I showed him a picture of my nasty bathtub. He's like, Oh, you guys ever hear a soft scrub? Yeah. Like, wow. What the f**k? You may just want to replace all that. Yeah. Yeah. Good deal. Yeah. Did they have a bathtub from Ed Gein's house? What's with all the toenails? Yeah, what is that? He's cutting toenails in there like 24-7. Yeah, right. So I explained it to him. He's like, oh, well, I'll just summon one of these ladies over to help you. Right, yeah, the experts. I'm like, oh, okay. I'll just sashay my way back over there, you know.I go there and I'm hanging out looking all cool. You know, you sashay is very funny. Yeah. I'm walking like some geisha, you know, it's like, yeah. Yeah. If you've ever seen the old Warner brothers cartoons, the guy, the big guy kind of dancing around Ferdinand, the bull. Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, Uh, so I wasn't there too long. Right. And just out of nowhere, this lady like is be lining over there. Like literally, literally, I didn't even say anything. Right. This is her. I'll like, this is her coming in and she's like, yeah. Okay. Well, what I got called over here. What do you need? Yeah. I'm like, I'm thinking this isn't, you know, it's Christy or Susie, I don't think. And I say this to everyone. This is not a sexist remark. I go, what do you know about plumbing? Which I think she really took the wrong way because that kind of amplified. You ever hear the term f**k around and find out? Yeah, that's a different.This is what happened. She watched you sashay across the store. She's like, oh, all right. We got a jackass right here. Some sexist jackass, you know, sashaying around. Well, I'm here. I got him here for your question. Where's your important question at? Where is it at? Come on. You don't even know what you need. I was a little intimidated by this woman. I'm going to be honest. It looked like she was in her early 30s. Okay. And she was not having it with me at all. She probably had a tough day with a bunch of jackasses like you. Sashaying around. Sashaying around the plumbing department asking stupid-ass questions. I told my wife, I go, either she was getting ready to eat lunch or she's trying to take a crap or something and got coming over to help me. Right? Yeah.And oh my God. Yeah. I don't know what I interrupted, but I really regretted the whole, I'm like, you know, uh, I'm not, yeah, I don't want to come back here anymore. I'm like, I didn't think I'm going to get bullied, bullied three knuckles deep in a DeWalt sander. Yeah, no shit. So, uh, I finally would, you know, get out what I wanted to tell her. Like, excuse me. I know. I know. It's like a bad Woody Allen film. You're going to have to take it apart and you have to bring it in and I got to see it because as you can see over here, there's 800 types of these things. Literally, literally, literally. Do you know how to turn off your water, young man? I said, hey, do I need to turn off the water with this? Yes, you do.He goes, yeah. I was like trying so hard to defuse it. I'm like, okay, how do I get out of this? Let's stop for just a moment. Why in the world were you trying to fix your shower yourself? This is not a Miles job. I don't know. Well, We had an alcoholic try to fix it like five years ago, and apparently whatever he did did not hold. It did not hold, unfortunately. It held for five years. I think that's pretty good, considering. Yeah. I was just like, man. I thought it was a put-on....

Bob fixes the dryer, really, while Miles gives his work neighbor a Rorschach test. GAMES, like old-school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here - https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ _ultp_btn_ic_right_circle_line_ultp_btn_ic_end_Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/AM-WcL92ULc Bob fixes the dryer, really, while Miles gives his work neighbor a Rorschach test. Bad AI Transcript There you go. There you go. Thank you. Hey, everyone. This is Jebediah Yoder singing your favorite rap hits. This week, I will sing Up In Here by the great DMX. Let's hear it, Jebediah. Your grandma's going to be wishing you were fishing something. I don't know. Let me digest your holes in your chest and... Maybe you need to print out the lyrics, Jebediah. I don't know the lyrics. Jebediah doesn't have printer. He doesn't have to print out. Maybe you should get that hammer and chisel and a rock. I'll have to talk to my son, Noah. Noah, you're there. Oh, my God. Hey, everybody. Welcome, Orienta. We have... Yeah, I don't know. It's funny voice night tonight, everybody. Have to do a funny voice to be on the show tonight very funny so uh how's everybody doing? It's like 100 degrees around here hey a lot of ball sweat Yeah, it's very sweaty. That's for sure. I'd like trying not to be outside because it's so oppressive.How about you, Miles? Is it hot in there? It is hot in the city tonight, Bob. Yeah. Hey, I read a statistic that people in Iowa are more likely to die of cancer, like they're the fourth leading state out of the 50 for people dying of cancer. I think that actually is true, yes. Yeah, it is. It's true. We're right up there, yes. Yeah, you're way up there. That's for certain. Yeah. I wouldn't be surprised. Man. Yeah. Yikes. What are you doing against that? But we're 50th in autoerotic asphyxiation deaths. Oh, really? I don't know. How'd that happen? I don't know how that is. It's really skewed. It's weird. It makes no sense. Do you think there's any kind of correlation between the two? Well, when you're good at one, yes. I don't know. I've got the cancer, but I'm not going to wank myself to death. I can't do it. I've got prostate cancer. No wanking.It's just me. Well, I hope you're doing okay. Don't drink the water. I think that's the problem. Too late. I drink this freaking iced tea every day around here. Oh, my gosh. Boy, if you get the new Lipton Ivermectin blend, you'll probably be all right. Oh, yeah. No, it will never happen. You'll probably be fine. It takes care of the cancer, and the COVID, and a million other things that you could possibly run into, you know, brain-eating amoebas and all that kind of stuff. I choose death over taking a horse tranquilizer for my health. Really? Or a horse, not a tranquilizer, but a... Horse medicine? Be warmer, whatever the f**k it is. Be warmer, yeah. You know, I've always said, do they have the rural king up there by you? No, come on, we can't afford that. You got Farm and Fleet?farm fleet some shit. Yeah. I don't know perhaps yeah I've heard of it okay any one of those places I've mentioned, if you know, if the shit goes down, get yourself to one of the TSC tractor supply. Any one of those places is going to be your refuge. Whenever, you know, stuff starts going south. Oh, Because they have, number one, they have weapons. Yeah. They got medicine. Right. Now it's for animals, but that's okay. They got clothing and food that'll last forever. Yeah. Because it's all uber processed and like packaged individually. You know what I mean? And they got bait. I didn't really put that much thought into it, but okay. Jail and otherwise. I've never seen that, but okay. That's fine. No, I've always said if everything goes to hell, head right for the rural king and barricade yourself in there. You'll be fine. It's like that old James Brolin movie where he's locked in that department store with those Dobermans. He's got to kill him with their bows and arrows and stuff. Oh, yeah. That's a great one.I was thinking more of Dawn of the Dead, but that's okay with the zombies. I was thinking more of Killdozer, but I don't know. He was in that as well. I love the 70s. I love the 70s. You know me. True enough. I fixed my dryer last night. You can fix anything. Well, from the looks on people's faces inside this house, that would be a shocking statement, I think. Dad, shut up. You're stupid, Dad. So the dryer was making this hellacious noise as if there were owls being crushed. Oh, God. And I'm like, well, let me look this up. Oh, Jesus. And sure enough, I figured out, well, there's these little rollers in your dryer that hold the drum so it turns, you know, smoothly. Yeah. And sometimes their bearings go out and then they get stuck. And then, of course, it just goes... Anyway. Yeah. And so I'm like, well, just order me the parts. So we get the parts ordered, you know, and then they were supposed to show up, I don't know, days ago or whatever. Anyway, they...I love how Amazon delivers on Sunday, which just blows my mind. You know, living my whole life where you don't get any deliveries on Sunday. Right. Now, all of a sudden, Amazon's like, f**k that. I'm delivering everything. And we get like three deliveries on Sunday. I'm like, what are these people doing in my house? They're not allowed. It's Sunday for Christ's sake. Go home. Leave me alone. Don't look behind that curtain. Yeah. Yeah. Quit looking in my window. Quit taking pictures of my porch, for Christ's sake. I was thinking about more Wizard of Oz. Don't look behind that curtain. Anyway, go ahead. So anyway, they deliver everything late on Sunday. As well, they work late on Sunday. I'm like, God, these poor people. Everything's gone to hell as far as jobs and stuff. Right. You got to work late on Sunday? I mean, what kind of world are we living in? Anyway...They leave it there, and so I'm like, well, you know, I got to get this done, right? I watched a video on YouTube of this guy who bumbled through it, and I'm like, God damn, this guy is the worst. He had to take things apart like three. Like, why is this video the number one video for fixing a dryer? This guy basically took this thing apart like two or three times, and then, well, I had to start over again. Wow, Christ. Here's the next house fire story. Jesus. F**k. So it took him, he said it took him like an hour and a half. And I'm like, I'm not very good at this kind of stuff, right? So I like at least two hours, two and a half hours, I figured. And so I start, I dig into it. Yeah. Because basically you have to disassemble the dryer, right?Yeah, that seems hard. That'd be hard. Yeah, I know this is not. We're out of Miles title territory. Yeah, about five minutes ago, I'm like, f**k, I don't want to call the guy over immediately. Like, you fix it. Here's 50 bucks. So I start taking it. I figure out and start taking apart. Now, the problem is the model that the guy in the video had is not the model that I have, of course. Oh, of course. Top of the line. So I got to figure out how to pop open this m**********r. And so I finally get it apart. And actually, mine was better made because it had extra parts in the video they didn't have holding things together, bracing and whatnot. And so I was like, hey, we paid top dollar for this. Yeah. This is great.You're like a combination of Professor and Mr. Howell from Gilligan's Island, I think. That's right. Oh, my God. Lovey. Bring me my wrench, Lovey. No, I'm – so this gives me a throwback. I grew up being the wrench guy. Yeah. And I did not like it one goddamn bit. Right. Right. Because I was the youngest. And so my brother, my father, I was always the fetcher. I would fetch things. So now that I am the one, you know, I guess in command or whatever. Command. Yeah, in command. I do not have a fetcher usually. It's a very rare occasion that I actually ask somebody to fetch me things. We're busy. I just usually use that opportunity to take a break and get something to drink. You know what I mean? I was a gopher. Yes, thanks, Michael. And so I'll take that opportunity when I have to go get the other wrench to go down, get something to drink, get something to eat or whatever, some chips or what have you. It's just a little break at that point since I have to walk out to the garage and go get stuff. Waddle.Well, yeah. So the weird thing is I'm really not, I mean, you say I fix anything. I'm not a fixer, although I will try historically speaking, but as I've gotten older, I'm like really grouchy about these things. And I'm just like, I'm just going to do it. Oh, you're getting your serious face. You get like your, your crunched up eyes. You get. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like Clint Eastwood of handyman. Yes. Yeah. I can't whistle. Anyway. Trying to do the good, the bad, and the ugly there. Anyway, so I'm like, yeah, I'll just do it. And everybody's like, you can't fix that. You can't fix that. You know what I mean? It's like, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm going to fix this. It's going to take a while because I don't move very fast, but I'll get it fixed. And what I've noticed is now...that I'm, you know, Mr. Gotta fix it. I'm also Mr. Always hurt myself. Oh, here we go. The bad knee. Here we go. No, no. Thankfully I did not hurt my, I am very careful on the knee. Yeah. I dropped the, uh, I had to take the whole front of the dryer off to get to this drum. I think the whole thing apart, take the front off. You can take this brace off, take the drum out. You got to take all this shit out. Right. Right. There's not really much to a dryer that I found out. And I was like, God, you know, even though I got the best one, it looked like I paid too much probably. But anyway, I dropped one of the panels right on my hand. So now my hands all bruised up. I look like, you know, I don't know what I look like. So it seems that just comes with the territory. You know what I mean? Yeah....

Miles gets a back rub for his sore arm at the chiropractor's while Bob can't believe how old everyone looks. GAMES, like old school games, play a few with the Static Radio twist here - https://www.staticradio.com/category/games/ _ultp_btn_ic_right_circle_line_ultp_btn_ic_end_Subscribe Random Show Click Below https://youtube.com/live/6IeXljXyIu4 Bob gets his stupidity outed on speakerphone while Miles singing gets him in more trouble than he expected. Bad AI Transcript Nobody knows where things are going to happen. You'll never find a love quite like mine. Hey everyone, this is Miles. Let's start a game. No truer words have ever been sung. Oh, my Lord. You're going to miss my love. Yeah. You're going to miss? You're going to miss? Maybe not miss, but you'll never find. It's definitely your song. You'll never find. It's like it was made for you. It's like you're my way, if you were singing. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So are you walking around singing any more songs in the house? Yeah. I'm going to sing all I want. I'm going to sing all I want. I'm going to sing my last week. I thought maybe you'd cut it out. No, we got over it. Oh, good. Oh, good. That's so good to hear. Yeah. It's tough when you guys are in turmoil over there in the title household. Yeah, I know. I don't like to fight over rock and roll. Tough on us. Innocence here, you know, I mean, let's have a,fight about, you know, infidelity or finances or something else, but not Rolling Stones, okay? Please don't. Please don't fight with Rolling Stones. That's what I say. I think your infidelity fight would be a bit one-sided. Yeah. Unless you included self-love. Um… Are you referring to gooning? Well, I think you mentioned that we were going to talk about this. Gooning, yeah. No, I'm not going to talk about gooning. Oh, okay. You know, there's a cartoon character, the goon. Yeah. In Popeye. Popeye cartoon. And? In the Jeep, yeah. And in college, there was this gentleman who had like some physical things going on, I guess. And my friends of Chicago, which i will not name, but they would yell out the window, hey, goon. Was this in chicago or was this uh this would be at a certain college, not Carbondale, though. Oh, okay, gotcha, I gotcha.And DeKalb, Illinois. Yeah, northern. Like northern Illinois area. Illinois, yeah. This poor guy. DeKalb went there, you know, so. Yeah. Can't be all bad, I suppose. I guess. I don't know. He was never in any of my classes. I don't know. Yeah. I'm sure you would have written it down had she been in your little notebook. Make up your mind. Miles was telling me about his masturbation notebook today before we started the show. You know, all I did before the show was I mentioned, I know Bob had worked some places and done some stuff, and I just had asked him a few questions. He got very uncomfortable about it. And so, because now I'm not allowed to mention that either to people. Oh, no, come on. I'm just like, out of the blue, you asked me these questions. I'm like…Do you sit around all day thinking of these things? Is this what you do with your time? It's like, really? All day long, I sit around. Things come to mind. God forbid you learn how to use artificial intelligence. I don't need it. The kind of weird crap you'd be pulling out of there. I just drive around and think of funny stuff. Okay. Gosh. I don't know. I'm trying to think if i got a story tonight. Do you have a story? Yeah. Oh, well then let's go with your story. Let's talk about who's in those, uh, in your mola skinny with your rubber bands around it. You know, and there's a, you know, Indiana Jones and, uh, the third one, which i'm blanking on the name of now, uh,The book of the Holy Grail that Indiana Jones' father has, you have something like that, I think. Oh, I see. I see. The Last Crusade? Yeah, The Last Crusade, that was it. I'm blanking out the name. Well, I didn't want to say anything that had anything to do with the Lord in reference to what you're talking about. Yeah. What's your story, son? Let's hear it. You know, and I don't, you know, I don't really like these cartoons you're making of me. What? Because they hit too close. Everybody loves them. No, this one is hitting way too close to home. There was one about me having a bad back. Oh, that was a good one. And that hit way too, because I have had some back issues. Yeah. And I actually injured my arm also the night of my birthday, the day I almost died.Right, yeah. I was playing air hockey and I injured myself, but I didn't really… I know. It wasn't my fault. I didn't hurt you. I injured myself, seriously. I f****d up my arm playing air hockey that night. I'm like, this guy's decrepit. It's like going to the Crypt Keeper's birthday, for Christ's sake. I know. And… As time went on, I was just having more increasingly painful arm pain. Which arm is this? Is this your… This is Monique. Right or left? Right. Really? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Okay. And just, you know, turn it around your left, but turn it a certain way. You'll be like, oh, yeah, but… How about your hand? How's your grip? My grip is great. Okay. Just checking. But anywho, so, you know, I said to my doctor, like, can I just get, you know, looked at? He's like, well, I don't know. What am I? Am I here to serve you? What am I? It's to pull the muscle or you're having a heart attack. I'm not sure. He's like, with everything you've got going on, this is the least you're aware of. You should just forget about this. Let's concentrate on the big things. Yeah, you're fine. Don't worry about it. I'm like, okay. Yeah.You've got insurance. Don't worry about it. You're fine. Come back next week. And so I said, screw it. There's this new multiplex chiropractor thing not too far away. Oh, my God. You with the chiropractors. Oh, my good Lord. And it's got a big staff. I'm like, oh, wow. It's like a big place. Chiropractors are us. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. And so they're like, oh, we can get you in right away. We can wrench your arm for you. You don't have to do it yourself anymore. We'll do it for you. We'll do it for you, bud. Come on. And so I get in there, you know. Do you do any x-rays? No, no. And the receptionist is like, very nice. Hi, I'm Julie. And fill out these papers. What's your problem today, Mr. Title? I bet. Another one of those people. So, yeah, I fill it out. Get done. And so I meet the guy. I got this guy. Hey, Miles, I'm Steve. Come on in.Dr. Crackers. He looked like a wrestler or something. Like a high school wrestler. Dr. Crackers. He had no neck. What is this guy? No neck to all arms. I'll be your chiropractor today. He goes, all right, come on. Is he like Macho Man? Oh, yeah. We're going to crack some back. He goes, I'm going to use AI to record you. What? I'm not going to make any notes. I'm going to use AI. Subject seems to be 75% to 85% flab. No muscle tone. I'm talking to this guy. Degenerative bone disease. No cartilage. I'm thinking I think me and this guy are probably about the same age, but he's definitely older than me. Looking at like the giant bags under his eyes and stuff. I go, he's definitely like older than you even, you know, he's got giant bags under his eyes. Yeah. Like he's packed his bags ready to go. Right. So anyway, why have bags under my, I don't think so. No, you don't. You're you've been blessed. Thank you. With, uh, sexy hair and no bags under your eyes. Oh, well that's, I am such a, you've got sexy hair, like Leanne.Yeah. Yeah. And, uh, anyway, he tells me his age. No, this guy is like almost like four years younger than me. I'm like, oh, wow. Oh, the chiropractor though yeah this wrestler it's a rusty character he looks like he could have been like maybe at one time, you know, I'm just saying. Yeah. Well, you're like, like a regular high school type wrestler, not like a professional wrestler. Maybe. I don't know. He said he was like a traffic field or something i traveled you know? Okay. Now this is where it gets juicy. So I was like, well, lay down. We're going to, you know, look at stuff or do stuff like that. Okay. All right. Why do you, how can I, why do you like all these people touching you? Is this a thing? Oh, you would have lost your shit, man. Okay. At first, you know, I'm getting kind of the pat on the arm. Like, Hey bud, listen, I'm going to get you going again. Yeah. Hey buddy, you're going to get going. Now the rubbing starts, you know, buddy. Okay. You're going to get going. Okay. And let me,Hey, let's look at that back, okay? Oh, yeah, you're tight. Let me rub that. Let me rub it. I'm getting like a rubdown now. I'm like, is this like a service? I'm like, is this extra? Did I go in the wrong place or something? I mean… Is this across the hidden hallway that… Yeah. I wish I would have had this much action in high school. Where's the AI come into this situation? This guy is like an OnlyFans going on or something. I don't know what it was like. Hey, you want some pictures of my feet? Yeah, you like that? You like it, Miles? Well, I guess. You like girls? Yeah. This guy's giving you a rub down. He's fine. He's He's combing your hairy back. Yeah, I don't think he's realizing how much he's doing this. He's patting my arm, patting my back. If he touches my V-hole or something, I'm out of here. I'm out of here. I'm the hell out of here. I don't think in chiropractic school, I don't think there's a V-hole. There you go.it might've been Larry Nassar, you know, I don't know. Today students, you graduated to the B hole. I was just, I, you know, I, I am, I, okay. Self-admitted. I am a little homophobic. Okay. I'm just going to say it right now. I'm a little bit, I'm a little bit, I know. I know it's not contagious. Okay. Just, no, I don't know. I just, I said, okay, well, If Bob Lament was here, he would not return. I know it. Number one, I wouldn't be there. You're a man. I wouldn't be at the chiropractor. You're a man. I know you're a man. I've s

Altamaha-ha On this episode of Mondo Freako, the host welcomes guest Julian (host of the Not Enough Questions podcast) for an episode exploring Georgia’s celebrated river cryptid, the Altamahaha—affectionately known as "Alti." After kicking things off with a debate on the horrors of Atlanta traffic and a 5-question trivia quiz, the discussion shifts to the lore surrounding the 20- to 30-foot serpentine creature said to haunt the brackish marshes near Darien in McIntosh County. Deeply rooted in indigenous Muscogee Creek and Yamasee oral histories, Alti is often described as a river-dwelling, plesiosaur-like beast with a snout resembling an alligator or gar, contrasting with skeptical theories pointing to misidentified Atlantic sturgeon or manatees. The pair examine the broader global phenomenon of freshwater "Nessie" sightings before diving into a map breakdown of the remote Georgia coast. While Julian questions how such a massive creature could evade modern surveillance, the host argues that the sparse, winding waterways and potential ocean migration routes offer plenty of hiding space. Weighing ancient folklore against modern skepticism, the episode closes with final verdicts on a 1-to-10 scale: Julian lands at a skeptical 3/10, while the host rates Alti at a 6/10, giving weight to centuries of indigenous testimony and the vastness of the coastal swamps. Not Enough Questions https://youtube.com/live/rcGEpwZTsbE UFO Witness Game (Click Graphic to Start) Transcript (AI transcription) Julian, how's traffic in Atlanta? It's going well. It's going well. Mondo Frico. Hey, everybody. Welcome to Mondo Frico. I am here with Julian. Julian, how are you doing tonight? I heard you had some traffic problems today, no? Yes, yes. Atlanta is known for its traffic. Everybody talks about Los Angeles and New York when it comes to traffic, but I can tell you I've never been in any worse traffic than in Atlanta. You were right. You will not find anything worse than Atlanta. I would say a second close, oddly, was Nashville. Really? I've never been to Nashville. Oh, literally on the highway, come to a complete stop. You can't even see Nashville. It looks like you're in the middle of nowhere. Everything stops. And then you just creep along until you finally see the skyline for Nashville. It's just kind of like Atlanta because Atlanta is that way too on the highway. Sometimes you'll just stop in the middle of nowhere close to Atlanta and really not even see the city. Where in Los Angeles and New York and everything, at least you see a city. That's very true. That is very true. And I haven't heard Nashville is a…Tennessee, Atlanta. Yeah, exactly. It is Atlanta and Tennessee. You're correct. I think you're right. But, yeah, it's the worst traffic, yeah. And I've been in all of the places I mentioned. I've sat in traffic in all of them. And, I mean, even New York City traffic wasn't as bad as Atlanta traffic or Los Angeles traffic. Mm-hmm. It's amazing. Don't they also have more lanes as well? They do. They do. But, I mean, there's a lot of lanes in Atlanta. I can't remember. Los Angeles has like seven lanes. I don't know. It's just crazy. But, you know, still, it doesn't matter if you have 100 lanes. If they're all stopped, nobody cares. They're like, this is terrible. Terrible if everyone has an accident and you can't make a left turn. Yeah. Exactly.It's pretty bad. Well, welcome to Mondo Freako, Julian. And we have a topic tonight. So on the show, just a real base to catch everybody up in case they've never seen it before. We talk about cryptids, UFOs, the supernatural, the paranormal, typically in a bit of a humorous way. But also we talk about, you know, what's happening with these things. And at the end of it, you and I will have a quick discussion on what we think about it. Is it real? Is it fake? Is it legend? We'll find out. Now, I always give everybody a choice at the beginning of this show. Well, first of all, tell us a little bit about Not Enough Questions and EQ Pods. I always like to get these things at the front because then if people don't listen to the whole thing, at least they get to hear what you've got going on. All right. Not Enough Questions is a podcast that I run.And I say it's, what do I say? It's a podcast where you can find, not every episode is for everyone, but you find a piece of humanity in every episode. We talk about… Well, it's a serial killer podcast. Is that what you're saying? No, no, no. Oh, okay. Sorry. It's more so a perspective-based critical thought question. Oh, okay. Thank you. Yeah, I should have said that. Yeah. Maybe I'll get a merger on there. You know it. A piece of humanity in every fight. Yes. Questions range from what is your dream job? Can you have two feelings at once? What crime would you commit knowing you're going to get caught? And some more funny ones, some more serious ones. It's a great time. It's an hour. Yeah, it's an hour podcast.Oh, there you go. See, look at that. I've actually been on the show with Julian at least twice. Twice, twice. Yeah, I was just saying, I think it's twice. And it's a lot of fun. And I can't, I'm sorry, I don't remember my question, but I think there was not enough of those questions. I can guarantee you there's more to come, right? I think the questions I said actually were the ones that you were on. What was your dream job? Oh, right. Okay. And then came how to feelings at once. And I said, professional Tanner sitting in the sunshine. That was my dream job. Something like that. No, I don't think I said that at all, but everybody should check it out at any Q pod on the socials, or you can follow this link tree, not,It seems longer than it really is. Not enough questions podcast. So when you say it, it's like, wow, that really rolls off the tongue. When you look at it, you're like, gosh, there's a lot of letters there. But it's all good. All good. So at the beginning of the show, I always ask the guests, we always have a quiz. And I'm going to give you the option of either doing the quiz before you even know the topic or… We'll talk a little bit about the topic. I'll tell you about the topic, and then you can take the quiz. I'd rather take the quiz now. Oh, he's going to take the quiz. Quiz. Quiz. Quiz. Quiz right off the bat. All right, let me get the quiz up here for you. Tell me if you can see it.You might not be able to read all of it. I'll try to make it bigger for you here. Okay. Let's see if I can. Oh, my goodness. I hit the wrong button. Hold on a second. Let's start that over. Don't give that answer. Here. Is that a little bit better? It's better. I'll read them off. Don't worry. I'll read them all off to you so you don't have to memorize them. And you already heard the wrong answer. If you get the wrong answer, what you hear is a buzzer. I love the hint. You can take a hint. Okay. The legendary creature Ultimahaha, affectionately nicknamed Ulti, is a cryptid reported to inhabit which state in the American South? Is it Georgia, Ohio, Idaho, or Alaska? And if you notice there, it says easy. Yeah, because I'm like, I'm knowing these questions like this. No, no, no, no, no, no. I think Georgia. Georgia should beThe only southern American state in here. Yeah, I don't think Alaska is in the southern part. There you go. Correct. Altamaha is Georgia's most famous river monster legend. Primarily with the Altamaha River and coastal marshes around Darien and McIntosh County. Now you kind of know what we're talking about tonight, right? So… According to eyewitness folklore, this is question number two so far. You got one correct. According to eyewitness folklore, which physical description fits how Ultima Ha-Ha is typically described? Is it A, 20 to 30 feet serpentine river creature with flippers, ridged skin, and an alligator or dolphin-like snout? B, a giant eight-legged turtle wearing sunglasses? No. C, a winged lizard that nests in high pine trees and only feeds on acorns. Or D, a miniature freshwater shark covered in bright neon feathers. I have a hint if you want it. These all sound very interesting. And I'm trying to think which one would I more likely see. I want to say a winged lizard. You want to go with C, a winged lizard? A winged lizard. Okay. And I have a hint. You sure you don't want the hint?I don't want to take the hint right now. All right. Oh, sorry. Witnesses usually report a 20 to 30 foot aquatic creature that undulates vertically through the water, sporting paddle-like flippers and a long snout. All right. You got one right and you got one incorrect. It's fine. You're doing fine. You're doing fine. That's why I wanted to take the quiz now. Okay. Now, this one's a hard question. It says, long before European settlers documented sightings, legends of a giant snake-like river creature in this region originated with which Native American group? Was it A, the Muscogee or Creek, and the Yamase peoples, B, the Inuit of Northern Canada, C, the Hawaiian monarchy, or D, the Aztec Empire? I have a hint. I'm going with my gut and saying A.All right. The Muscogee Creek and Yamasee oral histories describe a large water serpent or river beast inhabiting the waterways of coastal Georgia centuries before any modern sightings. Hey, you're doing good there. You got two correct. We got a couple more to go. We got five questions altogether. Which historic coastal Georgia town serves as the cultural hub of Altamahaha, lore, even featuring a dedicated statue and adopting the monster as its local mascot. Is it A, Darien, B, Paris, C, Honolulu, or D, Reykjavik? I have a hint. I would take a hint. Yeah, please give me the hint. This small port city sits right at the mouth of the Altamaha River in McIntosh County. Well, since I don't know this county… I'm going to go with A. There you go, right again. Darien, Georgia celebrates Alty with public artwork, museum displays, and tourism merchandise, of

This Week In this episode of LeMent Tonight, host Bob interviews Southern California stand-up comedian John Liu, exploring his background as a first-generation Filipino-Chinese American and his journey in comedy. The conversation touches on John's day job as an auditor—which he deliberately keeps separate from his stand-up routines—as well as his experiences performing across the United States and internationally in Taiwan and the Philippines. After playing a lighthearted improv game where John offers intentionally terrible advice for dating and dinner parties, the discussion shifts to his love for cooking traditional Filipino dishes like adobo and kare-kare, followed by reflections on vegetarianism, religion, and the practical challenges of owning and operating an independent comedy club. https://JohnLiuComedy.com https://youtube.com/live/lSicf2OlkSo Bad AI Transcript Hey, everybody, it's Lament Tonight. guest tonight is john Blue. Or is it live? Now, how would you pronounce this, John? I pronounce it it makes it easier for my neighbors. Yes, sir. Oh, okay. You're totally ignoring the eye pretty much. I'm trying to be less central me i'm not trying to be less egocentric. Let's talk about you So John Liu is a first-generation Asian American. You give your heritage as Filipino and Chinese on your bio. You're based in Southern California. You have a sharper tongue, as we just heard. And your comedy centers around growing up in a multicultural background, being a first-generation immigrant, current events, and dealing with the ever-changing American zeitgeist. You can catch him… at JohnLiuComedyLiu.com. John Liu, how are you doing tonight? Cheers. I'm doing great. I'm chilling in a city called Anaheim, which is, as if you may know, may or may not know, is the hometown of Disneyland. Lovely, beautiful day in Southern California. The heat is finally letting up. The humidity is letting up. And there's some wild parrots hanging around outside. It is a good day.Were you at Disneyland today? No, no, no, no. A friend of mine is running a comedy show. So before I showed up, before I logged in, I dropped in to say hello. Support local comics, support my friends, all that good stuff. Well, that was awful nice. I do what I can. Were you just there for support or did you do something else? No, it's a theme night, actually. I have a friend. His name is Eric Escobar, Hilarious Comics. plug for him uh he run he's doing a special comedy night uh at a local brewery called cast comedy night these are all current or former disney performers so i went down to catch you know catch his comedy and you know see see some comics and now i'm here with you and this is a wonderful setup thanks again for having me bob you're so gracious my goodness are you your mother must be very proud of you. I hope soYou're so polite. So now you just said for current or former Disney performers. Now, what do you mean by that? Well, OK, so when you go to Disneyland, they have people working, you know, staff members. They also have crew members. These are the forward facing people like the tour guides on the Jungle Cruise or, you know, people manning, you know, dressed up as characters, things like that. Oh, okay. Cast members, as they like to say, so they don't have to pay them. It's true. But funny enough, I do believe they're part of the actors' union, too. They're actually considered acting. It's an acting job, I think. Oh, really? Okay. It's fascinating. That's a good move on their part, is to pull that in, right? So the whole cast member thing was kind of a dodge, I think, originally. And so now they're going, yeah, well, wait.If we're cast members, we're acting. Have you ever worked at Disney or no? No. Oh, my gosh, no. I have no patience for that kind of thing. I wear my heart on my sleeve and my contempt on my face, so it's kind of like I can't do that. It's very difficult for me to be in a customer-facing position. You're so polite. You've been so polite to me tonight. And here you're saying, oh, no, I can't do that. It's a lot of work, Bob. So you've got like five minutes of pleasantries and then after that it's all venom or what? Well, I don't know what to say. I really don't. I'm not much of a conversationalist. That's why I'm in stand-up and not improv. Oh, my goodness. It's working right now, John. Well, cheers. Thank you. Now, since you're a Filipino-Chinese, is John your first name or is this an Americanized name for you?Well, here's the thing you got to know really quickly about the Philippines. We are an English-speaking country. English is one of the languages that we speak, so we do have a lot of crossover. John is actually my given birth name. So, yeah. I do have a Chinese name, but I don't use it too much, mainly because I can barely speak Chinese. It's like at a four-year-old level, if I'm lucky. It's terrible. What level of Chinese do you speak, John? Oh, four-year-old. I don't know. I really don't know. My wife describes it as, my wife says I understand half of the conversation. Unfortunately, I understand the useless half. I only know the words and, the, and. Right. I can count to a decent extent. I know important phrases, some words, because I did go to school where they taught Chinese, butPart of the difficulty is that I didn't get a lot of practice. I moved to the States when I was a teen, and where I moved to, there weren't a lot of Chinese speakers, so it kind of fell by the wayside, and I wasn't that good to begin with. So where did you grow up in your teens? Can you tell me an area? Southern California, through and through. Okay, so dude, whoa, hey. Pretty much, pretty much. There's no Chinese words for that. No, if there are, I don't know them. So would you in the Southern California culture, would you what would you describe yourself as? So like, you know, there's skater, surfer, you know, beach. I think the closest thing I don't know if they still have them. But, you know, when I was younger, I was definitely more in the nerd slash preppy kind of thing. Oh, OK. Yeah.And I was a kid. I had my fun, but I wasn't much into skating, wasn't much into sports. I was a bit of a nerd. I was into comic books, toys, that kind of thing. And I'm not – the why doesn't apply anymore, but I would certainly be – could have been classified as a yuppie back in the day. I think you and I are of the same generation that you know what a yuppie is. Oh, yeah. And for the younger folks, a yuppie – Young Urban Professional. Oh, I thought you were going to say it was a wet puppy. No, no, no, no, no. No, I know. Young Urban Professional. Exactly. You drove your Beamer. And your girlfriend was named Buffy. No, I don't have money. That's why I'm here. No offense. But otherwise, I would have bought myself a comedy club and called it a day. Oh, well, that's interesting.Why are you waiting? What is stopping you from realizing this dream? My bank account. Well, no. Banks will give anybody money. You could go get a loan. They want me to pay it back eventually. That's the part you've got to figure out. Respect anyone that runs a comedy venue. It's not easy. It isn't. Well, you just sell drugs in the back and you're all set. Everything works out. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, no, it's not for me. Plus, it's a lot of logistics that I don't really want to deal with. I want to be free. I want to be happy. You know what? You can have the John Liu comedy car. It's like Uber, except you get comedy on the way to your destination. Actually, a friend of mine had this idea recently.of taking, like, you know, one of those creepy, gigantic vans, you know, and just opening up the door and having, like, a pop-up comedy show, have the speakers and the mic in there, and just drive wherever, park somewhere, and set up a comedy show that way. Yeah. I mean, they did the cash cab on television for I don't know how long. You could do the comedy cab. Talk about a captive audience. Just lock the doors, have the choppers. That's right. And then if they want to get out, they got to pay you. Yeah. Oh, my God. We could be like those crazy people that preach on planes. Have you been seeing that on the news? No. We could do that. We could just put on a comedy show. They preach on a plane? Is that allowed? No. It's absolutely not. Explain this to me. Do they just, like, bother the person next to them, or do they stand up and tell the whole plane? No, they stand up and tell the whole plane. Oh, my word.one lady, she got put on the no-fly list forever because she was pretty much preaching the entire time. She would get up, preach to the plane, and just she just refused to sit down. You know, all that stuff. And there are a couple people doing that so i'll be honest with you. I would rather have it happen in a plane than anywhere else because, I mean, you never know. That's fair. You look like a 50 50 that you may need that at that moment. That's true. That's true. You know, but it, yeah, it's all about that captive audience, getting that group of people together. And I like to perform, I'll be honest. I like to perform, you know, I, it's the advertising, the marketing that doesn't appeal to me, you know? Oh no. Well, I think this, I think this, you know, comedy Uber thing is the way to go. Cause then, I mean, you like to go places, right?Absolutely. Travel is one of the perks. I've gotten to go to so many places and see so many things that I wouldn't have if I wasn't in comedy. It gives me that incentive to travel. Tell me some of the places you've gone. Have you gone to Macau? I have not. I've only recently started traveling for comedy. Let's see. I've performed in the Philippines. I've been to open mics in Taiwan. Wow. in terms of shows, proper shows, I've done shows in washington dc maryland uh arizona nevada yeah washington you know, and of course, California, Minnesota, just traveling all over and i'm trying to do more. I love how do you, in Taiwa