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The love is real. You know you love him. But somewhere between the school pickups, the dinner, dishes, and dogs, and the dozen things on tomorrow's list, you realize something unsettling. You have not actually been with him in days. Not really. You have been in the same house. Maybe even in the same room. But making room for us — for the two of you — has quietly slipped to the bottom of a list that never seems to end. And what gets pushed to the bottom eventually gets forgotten. That is not because you do not care. It is because life is loud. And marriage, by nature, is patient. It does not scream for your attention the way a crying toddler does or the way a work deadline breathes down your neck. Your marriage will wait for you. But here is the truth  — it will not wait forever without cost. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage Marriage often gets whatever time is left — leftover time produces leftover connection. Leftover intimacy. Leftover closeness. And after enough days, weeks, and months of leftovers, you start to feel like roommates instead of lovers. Partners in logistics instead of partners in life. You look across the table and wonder, when did we stop being us? The answer is usually not one dramatic moment. It is a thousand tiny ones, a thousand times something else came first. But you can change that. And you get to start now. Marriage was never meant to survive on scraps. God did not design your covenant to live in the margins of your calendar. He placed it at the center. Before children. Before career. Before ministry or friendships or anything else you pour yourself into. He brought two together and said, this is good. Mark 10:9 says it plainly: "Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." And while we often read that verse in the context of outside threats, let us be honest — sometimes the thing separating us is not another person. It is our schedule. Our busyness. Our unwillingness to slow down long enough to reconnect. Creating space for your marriage is not selfish. It is really being obedient. When you protect time for each other, you are protecting the very thing God called good. You are honoring the covenant He witnessed. You are saying, this matters to me because it matters to Him. But here is where it gets real — this must come between two people. You cannot build connection alone. You can open the door. You can set the table. You can create the space. But someone has to walk through it with you. "It takes one to start, and two to finish." — Kristianne Wargo Maybe you are the one who initiates. Maybe you are the one who says, "Can we just sit together tonight?" That is okay. One person starting is not weakness — it is leadership. But finishing? That requires both of you choosing each other. Think about Song of Solomon 7:10 — "I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me." There is a mutual turning toward one another in that verse. A leaning in. A claiming and being claimed. That does not happen, though, by accident, and it certainly does not happen when every evening is consumed by everything except each other. At some point, you have to realize it's time to protect the space between the two of you. The K.I.S.S. ~ Protect the space between you! It does not have to be extravagant. It does not require a weekend getaway or a reservation at a nice restaurant — though those are wonderful when they happen. Making room can be as simple as deciding that the two of you are worth fifteen uninterrupted minutes. That your marriage deserves more than the tired silence between climbing into bed and falling asleep. Mignon McLaughlin once said, "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." And she was right. But you cannot fall in love with someone you never spend time with. Falling requires presence. It requires showing up — not just physically, but with your full attention, your full heart, your full self. What does it look like in real life to protect the space between you? 1. Schedule a Weekly "Us" Moment Treat it like an appointment you cannot cancel. It does not have to be a fancy date. A walk around the block after the kids are in bed. A cup of coffee on the porch before the day starts. Thirty minutes with no agenda except being together. Put it on the calendar. Block it out. And guard it the way you guard every other commitment that matters. 2. Audit Your Calendar Honestly Pull it up. Look at it. Where is your marriage on the list? If it falls below work, kids' activities, social obligations, church committees, and everything else — something needs to shift. You do not have to overhaul your entire life in one day. But move one thing this week to make space for connection. Cancel one obligation. Say no to one invitation. Trade one hour of screen time for a conversation. Just one. 3. Create a Device-Free Zone or Time Whether it is the dinner table, the bedroom, or the first fifteen minutes when you are reunited at the end of the day — designate a sacred space where it is just the two of you. No scrolling. No notifications. No half-listening while your eyes are glued to a screen. Presence is the most powerful gift you can give your spouse. And it costs you nothing except the willingness to put the phone down. Your marriage does not need more time — it needs protected time. There is a difference. You will never "find" time for your relationship. Life will always fill the gaps. You have to make it. You have to carve it out, fence it in, and refuse to let it be the thing that gets bumped when the week gets full. "Because what you protect, grows. What you neglect, drifts. And the space between you and your spouse is either going to be filled with connection or filled with distance. You choose." ~ Kristianne Wargo So choose us. Choose to make room. Choose to turn toward each other instead of past each other. Choose to stop treating your marriage like it can survive on whatever energy you have left at the end of the day. It won't survive long-term, and honestly, it should not have to. Give of your heart by making room for us! "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

There's a tiredness that sleep doesn't fix. It's not in your body — it's in your soul. It's the kind of exhaustion that shows up when you've been pouring and pouring and no one ever thought to ask if you were empty. You made breakfast, signed the permission slips, held the crying child, smiled through the chaos, late-night conversations — and when the house finally went quiet, you realized you had nothing left. Not for them. Not for yourself. Not for the woman you used to recognize. She gave everything and called it love — and you know her because you've been her or might be her right now.  Question: When was the last time you were still here — fully here — and not just functioning? Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #ConfessionsOfAnUpsetMama #CreateYourNow #TodaysParent Some love looks like sacrifice. Then, there's a version of sacrifice that looks like vanishing. And somewhere along the way, a lot of mamas started confusing the two. You skipped lunch again. You can't remember the last book you read for yourself. You stopped calling your friend back — not because you don't love her, but because you ran out of energy three days ago and you're still running on empty. You surrendered your boundaries, your rest, your identity — and you wrapped it all in a bow and called it love. But here's the truth that might sting before it heals: selfless and self-less are not the same thing. One is generous. The other is gone. One pours from fullness. The other pours from fumes. And your family doesn't need a mama running on fumes. They need a mama who's still in the room — not just in the role. Matthew 22:39 says, "Love your neighbor as yourself." Not instead of yourself. Not at the expense of yourself. As yourself. That little word carries the whole weight of what we've been getting wrong. You cannot love others well from a place of self-neglect. You can't pour into your children's lives what you've already drained from your own. The "as yourself" part isn't a footnote — it's the foundation. You can't serve from an empty cup. And yet, so many of us were taught — directly or indirectly — that good mamas disappear. That the highest expression of love is erasure. That if you still have dreams, needs, desires of your own, you must not be giving enough. That's not scripture. That's not wisdom. That's a lie dressed up in "look at me" clothes. So let's call it what it is. When you give and give and give until there's nothing left, that's not devotion. That's depletion. And depletion doesn't raise whole children — it raises children who learn that love means losing yourself. Is that your living legacy? Proverbs 4:23 warns, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Everything. Your patience flows from it. Your joy flows from it. The way you respond to your toddler at 6 a.m. or your teenager at midnight or your late conversation with your adult child — it flows from whatever is left in your heart. And if you've emptied it for everyone else and kept nothing for yourself, what's left to flow? You can't serve from an empty cup. This isn't a rebuke, mama. This is a rescue. Because the woman who keeps disappearing and calling it love is not being selfless. She's being silent. And silence, over time, turns into resentment, exhaustion, and an identity you can't find anymore beneath the pile of everyone else's needs. DEEP THOUGHT: You can love your family deeply and still be here. Both are possible. Both are necessary. Loving them doesn't require losing you. In fact, the most powerful thing you can do for your children is show them what it looks like to be a whole woman — not a hollow one. The K.I.S.S. ~ Know the difference! So where do you start? How do you draw the line between beautiful sacrifice and slow disappearance? 1. AUDIT Your Sacrifice. Ask yourself: "Am I giving from love, or am I giving because I'm afraid of what happens if I stop?" Fear-driven giving isn't generosity — it's survival mode. There's a difference between choosing to serve your family and feeling like you'll fall apart — or they'll fall apart — if you don't. One is love. The other is a cage you built with your own hands and forgot you hold the key to.  "When you stop long enough to ask why you're giving, you'll finally see what you've been giving away." — Kristianne Wargo 2. RECLAIM One Thing. Choose one thing you gave up that wasn't yours to surrender — a friendship, a hobby, a boundary, a dream. You don't have to rebuild it today. Just name it. Say it out loud. Write it down. Decide that it still belongs to you, because it does. Motherhood asked for your commitment — it never asked for your disappearance.  "Reclaiming who you are is not selfish. It's the bravest thing a mama can do for the people she loves most." — Kristianne Wargo 3. REDEFINE Love Out Loud. Tell someone — your spouse, your friend, your journal — "Loving my family and loving myself are not in competition. I can do both." Say it even if your voice shakes. Say it even if you don't fully believe it yet. Because the moment you speak it, you start building a new definition of love — one that includes you.  "The love that erases you was never love at all. Real love has room for everyone in the house — including you." — Kristianne Wargo If you've been disappearing and dressing it up as devotion, know this isn't condemnation. It's a heart and an invitation. You get to come back. You get to take up space in your own life. You get to love fiercely and still have something left for the woman in the mirror. "Sacrifice is beautiful. Disappearing is not. Know the difference." ~ Kristianne Wargo Your children don't need a ghost of who you used to be. They need the living, breathing, whole version of their mama — the one who laughs and dreams and rests and stays. The one who teaches them by example that love never asks you to vanish. The love that's present because of your presence. You're still here. And that matters more than you know. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Some seasons ask you to keep going when nothing around you looks any different. The bills are still there. The relationship still aches. The answer you've been praying for hasn't shown up at your door with a bow on it; no overnight delivery. And somewhere in the quiet of another ordinary morning, you wonder if anything is actually happening at all. My friend — you can hold on to what you cannot see. Because the most important work rarely announces itself. It moves underground, in the places your eyes will never reach, building something your circumstances haven't caught up to yet. Think about roots for a moment. They don't have eyes. They don't see sunlight. They don't know what the bloom will look like or when it's coming. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #Inspiration #CreateYourNow #DailyMotivation But they grow anyway. They reach. They stretch into soil that is dark and dense and offers no applause for the effort. And every single thing that will ever stand tall in a garden stands tall because of what happened down there first — unseen, unclapped for, unnoticed by everyone except the One who designed the seed. That's where you are right now. And it's not a punishment. It's a process. Hebrews 11:1 says, "Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." Faith is not wishful thinking. It's not crossing your fingers and hoping something sticks. Faith is confidence. Faith is assurance. Faith is standing with your feet planted on ground that the world says is shaky and knowing in your spirit that God already poured the foundation. You just can't see it yet — and you were never meant to. If you could see it all, you wouldn't need faith. And if you didn't need faith, you would never discover how deeply you are held. That's the part the enemy doesn't want you to know. He wants you measuring progress with your eyes. He wants you scanning your life like a scoreboard — checking the numbers, tallying the wins and losses, and deciding that if the visible results aren't there, then God must not be working. But God has never operated on your timeline, and He has certainly never operated on your scoreboard. He operates on covenant. And covenant doesn't expire because you had a hard week. So what do you do when you can't see it? You hold on anyway. You pray when the prayer feels like it's hitting the ceiling. You worship when your heart feels flat.  You get up and take the next step even though the path ahead looks exactly like the path behind. Because faith isn't a feeling. It's a decision. And every time you decide to trust God when nothing visible backs it up, your roots go deeper. You are becoming more anchored than you realize. The K.I.S.S. ~ Hold on to what you cannot see! Ben Stein once said, "Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will." There's a canyon of difference between those two things. Believing God can is theology. Knowing God will is relationship. It's the difference between reading about someone's faithfulness and having lived through enough dark nights to say, "He showed up before, and He will show up again." That kind of knowing doesn't come from a comfortable life. It comes from exactly the kind of season you might be standing in right now — the one where you can't see what's next but you refuse to let go. And maybe that's the invitation. Not to figure it all out. Not to force the breakthrough. But to simply hold on. To let your roots do what roots were made to do — reach for water in the dark, grip the soil a little tighter, and trust that the surface will catch up to what's already been established underneath. You are not stuck. You are stabilizing. There is a difference, and heaven knows it even when your mirror doesn't. The woman who holds on when she cannot see is not naive. She is brave. She is not ignoring reality — she is choosing a higher one. She is saying, "My God is bigger than my circumstance, and I will not let go of His hand just because I can't see His plan." That is not weakness. That is the deepest kind of strength there is. And it is building something in you that nothing — no delay, no disappointment, no detour — can take away. So hold on, my sweet friend. Not because the answers are coming tomorrow — maybe they are, maybe they aren't. Hold on because the God who planted you has never once forgotten where He put you. He is watering what He started. He is tending what He promised. And one day — maybe sooner than you think — what has been growing in the dark is going to break through the surface and take your breath away. Until then, keep reaching. Keep trusting. Keep becoming. You were never meant to see it all. You were meant to hold on to the One who does. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

You see it happening. Something in you is shifting — the way you pray, the way you respond, the way you hold your peace when you used to lose it. There's new growth forming in your spirit, and it's real. But before you rush to show the world, before you post it, proclaim it, or perform it for an audience, don't pick the bud. "The bloom's beauty comes from its budded heart that has had time to become. You can't rush what is not ready." ~ Kristianne Wargo Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #WellspringWednesday #CreateYourNow #HealthAndWellness And that's where so many of us stumble. Not in the growing — we're doing that. The stumbling happens when we try to speed up what God is still shaping. We see the first green of something beautiful and we want to yank it into full flower overnight. We want the testimony before the test is over. We want the fruit before the season is finished. But that's not how any of it works — not in a garden, and not in your soul. Ecclesiastes 3:11 reminds us, "He has made everything beautiful in its time." Not in your time. Not when you feel ready. Not when someone else's bloom makes you feel behind. In His time. And His time has never once been late. Think about it like this. A rosebud doesn't open because someone pulls its petals apart. It opens because the sun, the soil, and the season all come together at the right moment. You are that bud. God is the gardener. And the process you're in? It's not a delay — it's development. The temptation is real, though, isn't it? You start doing the inner work, and something in you wants credit for it. You want people to see the change. You want validation that all this quiet wrestling has been worth it. But when you perform growth that hasn't fully settled, you end up exhausted — holding up a version of yourself that isn't finished yet and wondering why it feels so heavy. Some things need to stay between you and God a little longer. Not because they're secret, but because they're sacred. "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still" (Exodus 14:14). Stillness isn't passive. It's protective. It gives your roots time to go deeper so that when the bloom does open, it holds. There's a difference between growing and performing growth. Growing is quiet. It happens in the mornings when nobody's watching, in the prayers you whisper in the car, in the choice to forgive before you feel like it. Performing growth is louder — it's the social media post about your healing journey before you've actually healed, the declaration of change before the change has cost you anything. You don't owe anyone a progress report on your becoming. Galatians 6:9 says, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." The proper time. Not the premature time. Not the "I'm tired of waiting" time. The proper time. And that harvest? It's worth the wait. The K.I.S.S. ~ Let it unfold! So what does it look like to let your becoming stay unhurried this week? 1. Resist the Urge to announce, perform, or prove your growth — hold it quietly this week and let it deepen. The next time you feel the pull to share your progress with the world, pause and ask yourself: Am I sharing because this is ready, or because I need someone to tell me it's real? Your growth doesn't need an audience to be valid. God sees every inch of it. That's enough for now. Journal it instead. Pray over it. Let the roots go one layer deeper before you invite the wind. 2. Practice Patience with your own process by choosing one area where you stop pushing and simply allow. Maybe it's your prayer life — you've been forcing discipline when what you really need is surrender. Maybe it's a relationship you keep trying to fix on your own timetable. Pick one thing this week where you consciously take your hands off the wheel and say, "God, I trust Your pace more than my plan." Patience isn't giving up. Patience is giving over. As the psalmist wrote, "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him" (Psalm 37:7). Practice that stillness. Let it teach you something. 3. Trust God's Timing for your reveal is better than yours — and rest in the waiting. Rest doesn't mean nothing is happening. Rest means you believe so deeply in the Gardener that you can stop trying to do His job. Think of it this way: a seed doesn't strain to become a tree. It simply stays planted and lets the process do its work. You are planted, not stalled. Hidden, not forgotten.  "A bloom forced open by human hands will wilt by morning. A bloom opened by the Son will stand through every season." ~ Kristianne Wargo Rest in that. Your reveal is coming — and it will be breathtaking because it will be ready. Impatience kills more growth than failure ever will. Failure just means you tried. Impatience means you didn't give what you tried time to become what it was meant to be. And you — the woman reading this right now — you are becoming something. Don't rob yourself of the fullness of it by rushing the reveal. Let the bud be a bud. Let the roots do their work. Let the quiet season finish what it started. Because when that bloom finally opens — and it will — it won't be forced. It won't be fragile. It will be the kind of beauty that only comes from a woman who trusted the process, stayed planted, and let God do what only God can do. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Pretending takes so much more energy than people realize. It's not just one lie — it's a thousand tiny adjustments every single day. You've been carrying it for a while now, haven't you? That careful smile. That practiced answer — I'm good, I'm fine, everything's great. And maybe you've gotten so good at wearing it that even you've started to believe it. But it's time to put the mask down because you're finally ready to be whole. Otherwise, you find youself adjusting your voice and your posture. You rearrange your face before you walk into the room. You swallow the hard thing and smile over the top of it, and then you wonder why you're so tired by noon. That is the weight of carrying something you were never meant to hold. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #Inspiration #CreateYourNow #DailyMotivation And here's something you must remember about the mask: it doesn't just hide your pain from other people. It hides you from God's work. Because it's harder to heal what we refuse to uncover. God is not going to force His way past the walls we build with our bright smiles and our "I've got this" speeches. He waits. He's patient like that. But He's also persistent — and every time that mask slips, even just a little, grace is already rushing in. Paul understood this. He had been given a thorn — something painful, something he begged God to take away. Three times he asked. And instead of removing the struggle, God whispered something that changed everything: My grace is enough for you. My power shows up best when you stop pretending you've got it all together. (2 Corinthians 12:9, NIV.) God is telling you to stop performing strength, and let Him be strong through you. The very thing you're trying to hide is the exact place where His power wants to be. Be present. Think about that for a moment. You've been exhausting yourself trying to prove you're unbreakable — and all along, the broken places were the entry points for something far greater than anything you could manufacture on your own. There's a line that says, "She was powerful not because she wasn't scared, but because she went on so strongly, despite the fear." Atticus  wrote that, and it lands differently when you read it in this light. Because when you put the mask down, it doesn't mean you stop being brave. It means you redefine what brave looks like. Brave isn't the woman who never struggles. Brave is the woman who says, I'm struggling — and I'm still here. I'm still showing up. I'm still trusting God with the parts of me that don't look polished enough for public display. That's real strength. Not the manufactured kind that crumbles in private, but the kind that's rooted in truth — the kind that can hold weight because it's honest about what it's carrying. The K.I.S.S. ~ Put the mask down! When you set the mask on the table and let people see you, you might be surprised. The world doesn't end. The people who love you don't walk away. And the ones who do walk away? They were loving the mask, not you. But the people who stay — and more importantly, the God who has always stayed — they meet you in a place that pretending could never reach. You start breathing again, not the shallow ones, but the deep, full, honest breaths. The kind that comes when you stop holding everything in. The kind that sounds a lot like surrender — and feels a lot like freedom. You don't have to have it all figured out this week. You don't have to stand on a stage and announce your mess. But you can start small. You can answer honestly the next time someone asks how you're doing. You can sit in prayer without performing for God — just showing up, raw, real, and open-handed. You can let one tear fall without immediately wiping it away and apologizing for it. Because every time you choose truth over performance, you make room. Room for healing. Room for grace. Room to become the woman you already are underneath all the pretending. And that's the woman God has been speaking to this whole time, even when you couldn't hear Him over the noise of keeping it all together. Put the mask down, my sweet friend. You don't need it anymore. What's underneath it is more beautiful, more powerful, and more loved than anything you could ever pretend to be. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

You've done it before: lying awake at night replaying a conversation that hasn't happened yet, mapping out every worst-case scenario before getting out of bed. You've carried the weight of what-if, and you didn't even realize how heavy it was until you couldn't stand up straight anymore. Fear-based thinking doesn't always look like panic. Sometimes it looks like planning. What a concept!  Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #MindsetMonday #CreateYourNow #PersonalDevelopment It's the mental rehearsal of everything that could go wrong — the "what if" spiral that quietly hijacks your peace and steals the present moment right out of your hands. And it's time to set it down. "If everything is lived in what is not, how can you be present with what you've got?" ~ Kristianne Wargo That's the danger of "what-if." It sabotages the present, only leaving the past and the future to deal with — both of which you have zero control over. You can't undo yesterday. You can't micromanage tomorrow. But you can lose today trying. And that's what worry does. It doesn't protect you. It doesn't prepare you. It robs you. Corrie ten Boom once said, "Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength." Every ounce of energy you're spending on "what if" is an ounce you don't have for "what is." You are draining yourself of the very strength you need for the moment you're actually standing in. And God's Word is clear about this. 2 Timothy 1:7 tells us, "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind" (KJV). Listen up! God hath not given you the spirit of fear. He gave you power. Love. A sound mind. That means every time you spiral into "what if," you're picking up something He never handed you. You're carrying a weight He never placed on your shoulders. Jesus Himself addressed this head-on: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" — Matthew 6:25–26 (NIV). If God feeds the birds, how much more will He take care of you - the one who calls His own? Don't get caught up in the what-if. Think about what happens after trusting in faith. W.H.A.T.-I.F.! The K.I.S.S. ~ W.H.A.T.-I.F.! DOWNLOAD WHAT-IF? What happens after trusting in faith? So let's get honest for a second. What is too heavy for you to carry alone? What keeps you up at night? What do you need to let go of in order to be fully present — right here, right now? Because those "what-ifs" are not just thoughts. They are weights. And if you want to drop the weight, you start with the what-ifs. WRITE down every "what-if" running through your mind right now. Get it out of your head and onto paper. When worry lives only in your thoughts, it grows in the dark. Naming it brings it into the light — and light is where God does His best work. HAND each one to God in prayer. Literally say it out loud: "I can't carry this. It's Yours." Don't just think it — speak it. There is power in surrender that is spoken, because the same mouth that spirals into fear can declare faith. ANCHOR yourself in one truth today. Choose one scripture — maybe 2 Timothy 1:7, maybe Matthew 6:25–26 — and come back to it every single time the "what-if" tries to pull you away. Truth is your tether. Let it hold you. Here's what I want you to walk away with today. "What-if" is not discernment. It is not wisdom. It is worry dressed up in productivity's clothing. And you were never meant to carry it. God didn't design you to live in a future that doesn't exist yet. He designed you for now — create your now — this breath, this moment, this day. So flip the script. Instead of asking, "What if everything falls apart?" — ask, "What happens after I trust God with it?" That's the real W.H.A.T. I.F.: What Happens After Trusting In Faith. You know the answer: freedom, peace, and presence. The ability to actually live instead of just bracing for impact. Drop the weight. Pick up the truth. And create your now. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

You know that moment right before the words leave your mouth —  your pulse is up, your thoughts are racing, and everything in you wants to say the thing. To set the record straight. To be heard. To fire back. But before you say a word, what if the most powerful thing you could do in that moment is nothing at all? What if the gap between the feeling and the speaking is actually one of the wisest places God has given you to stand? Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #SweetSpirit #CreateYourNow #SoulfulSunday We live in a world that celebrates the quick comeback. The sharp reply. The person who always has something to say and says it loudly. "Wisdom has never been about being the loudest voice in the room. Wisdom is about being the most anchored one." ~ Kristianne Wargo Scroll through any comment section and you'll see it — everyone rushing to speak, and very few stopping to listen.  James 1:19–20 puts it plainly: "My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires."  Quick to listen. Slow to speak. Slow to become angry. Notice the order. It's intentional. God doesn't start with what comes out of your mouth. He starts with what you let into your heart. Listening comes first — listening to Him, listening to others, listening to what's really happening beneath the surface of a situation — before a single word is formed. And here's the thing about listening: it's not passive. Real listening, the kind that wisdom requires, takes more strength than speaking ever will. It means setting your own agenda aside. It means not rehearsing your response while someone else is still talking. It means trusting that God can handle the silence while you sit in it long enough to hear what He's actually saying. Think about the people in your life who have spoken the most life into you. Chances are, they weren't the ones who talked the most. They listened deeply and then offered words that carried weight. That's not an accident. Proverbs 17:28 tells us, "Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues." There is a credibility, a gravity, that comes with restraint. When you don't react to everything, when you choose your words carefully, people lean in. They trust what you say because you don't waste it. "Words carry wisdom. And wisdom carries weight. Walk in wisdom." ~ Kristianne Wargo The K.I.S.S. ~ Before you say a word! Now, let's be honest. This is hard. Especially when someone has hurt you. Especially when you know you're right. Especially when the situation feels urgent and your emotions are telling you that if you don't speak now, the moment will pass. But wisdom is not afraid of the moment passing. Wisdom knows that the right word at the wrong time can do just as much damage as the wrong word altogether. Proverbs 15:1 reminds us, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Gentle doesn't mean weak. Gentle means measured. Intentional. Held in the hands of God before it's released into the world. Before you say a word might look like: It looks like pausing before you send that text. It looks like taking a breath before you respond to your teenager, your spouse, your coworker, your friend. It looks like asking God, "What do You want me to say here?" — and being genuinely willing to hear the answer, even when that answer is "Nothing right now." It looks like valuing the relationship more than being right and valuing God's righteousness more than your own vindication. Walking in wisdom means understanding that your words carry weight. Every single one of them. And the woman who walks with God doesn't throw her words around carelessly. She holds them. She weighs them. She offers them when they will build and withholds them when they will break. That is not silence born from fear. That is silence born from faith — faith that God sees, God hears, and God will make all things right in His timing. Today, before you say a word, give yourself permission to pause. You don't have to have the last word. You don't have to respond in the heat of the moment. You don't have to prove anything to anyone. The God who created the universe with His words is the same God who invites you to steward yours. Listen first. Breathe. Pray. And when you do speak, let it be life. Let it be truth wrapped in grace. Let it be wisdom made audible. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Something powerful happens in a marriage when one person turns to the other and says, with quiet, deliberate presence — I see you. The power of "I see you" is not about fixing anything, solving a problem, or checking something off a list. It is about pausing long enough to notice the human being standing right in front of you.  The one who shows up day after day, doing the things no one claps for. The one who carries burdens they have not fully named. When was the last time you looked at your spouse and let them know that who they are matters to you? Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage We live in a world that is loud and fast. Between work and kids and bills and schedules and the sheer weight of just keeping life together, it is easy to fall into the rhythm of coexisting. You are both in the same house, sitting on the same couch, sleeping in the same bed — and still somehow missing each other. Not because you do not care. But because exhaustion has a way of pulling your eyes to everything except the person beside you. And over time, when someone does not feel seen, they start to disappear. Not physically — but emotionally. They pull back. They stop sharing. They stop hoping that you will notice. That is why this matters so much. Genesis 16:13 tells us, "She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: 'You are the God who sees me.'" Hagar — alone, afraid, cast out — was met by a God who did not look away. And the very thing that changed everything for her was not that He rescued her from her circumstance in that moment. It was that He saw her. He saw the real her. The struggling, scared, overlooked her. And she was never the same. Your spouse needs that from you. Not perfection. Not performance. Just presence. Think about it — When was the last time you acknowledged the things your spouse does that nobody else sees? The way they check the locks before bed. The way they push through their own exhaustion to make sure the kids are cared for. The small, steady, unspectacular acts of love that hold your household together. These things are easy to overlook because they are consistent. But consistent does not mean unimportant. Consistent means faithful. And faithfulness deserves to be honored. Proverbs 20:5 says, "The purposes of a person's heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out." That is what seeing your spouse is all about. It is not just watching — it is drawing out. It is going beneath the surface of "I'm fine" and "It was a long day" and pressing in with curiosity and care. It is choosing to know them at a level that no one else gets to reach. Lao Tzu once said, "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." Seeing your spouse deeply—and letting them know — is one of the humble, kindest things you can do in your marriage. Because it requires vulnerability. It requires slowing down. It requires letting go of your own agenda long enough to be fully present with someone else's heart. Notice what matters. The K.I.S.S. ~ Notice what matters! So how do you actually do this in real life? How do you move from intention to action? 1. Acknowledge What Goes Unnoticed. Maybe it is the way they always lock the door at night, how they make sure the kids have what they need, or the quiet sacrifices they make when no one is watching. Do not let it stay silent. Say it out loud: "I see what you do, and it matters." Those words land differently than "thanks." They say, I am paying attention. You are not invisible to me. 2. Eyes Up, Heart Open. Put your phone down for one full conversation this week. No multitasking. No half-listening. No scrolling while they are mid-sentence. Give them the gift of your undivided attention. Eye contact is powerful — it tells the other person, right now, you are the most important thing in my world. One real conversation will do more for your connection than a dozen distracted ones. 3. Ask a Deeper Question. Go beyond "How was your day?" Try something that actually opens the door: "What is on your heart right now?" or "What is one thing I can do to make this week easier for you?" or "What can I do to serve you?" You might be surprised at what they share when they realize you genuinely want to hear the answer. TRUTH — Your spouse is not asking you to be perfect. They are asking you to be present. They are asking you to look up from the noise and see them standing there. Not the version of them that shows up at work or at church or at the family dinner. The real one. The one who is tired and hopeful and doing their best and wondering if anyone notices. You get to be the one who notices. Marriage is not built on the big moments alone. It is built on the Tuesday nights when you turn to each other and say, "I see you. I am glad it is you." It is built in the ordinary, unremarkable, sacred space of choosing each other — over and over again. So this week, slow down. Look closer. Speak life into the person who shares your life. Because when your spouse feels seen, they feel safe. And safety helps love grow deeper.  Just keep falling in love all over again. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Somewhere along the way, somebody decided that the holiest version of motherhood looks like a woman who has nothing left. Pour out. Give more. Skip the meal. Skip the rest. Run yourself completely dry and call it faithfulness. And if you've ever whispered a prayer through clenched teeth because you had nothing left to give — then you've already bumped into the myth of the empty vessel.  But today, you're dismantling it — because that myth was never God's design for you. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #ConfessionsOfAnUpsetMama #CreateYourNow #TodaysParent Think about this: Jesus had a world to save. Literally. And yet, in the middle of pressing crowds and desperate needs, He told His disciples, "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest" (Mark 6:31). He didn't push through until He collapsed. He didn't wear exhaustion like a badge of honor. He withdrew. He rested. He refilled. If the Savior of the world needed replenishment, why on earth are we pretending we don't? Let's be real! The culture says an empty mama is a sacrificial mama. But God says something different. He says, "Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint" (Isaiah 40:31). He didn't say, "Those who grind themselves into dust will finally earn My approval." He said those who hope — those who pause long enough to turn back to Him — those are the ones who soar. You were never meant to be a vessel that only empties. God created you to overflow. But overflow requires something inside first. When the tank is bone-dry, what comes out isn't patience — it's survival. It's white-knuckle parenting. It's going through the motions of bedtime and breakfast with nothing behind your eyes but exhaustion. And somewhere in the back of your mind, a quiet voice says, *This is all there is.* But that voice is a liar. So here's the truth that got lost somewhere between the first positive pregnancy test and the thousandth packed lunch and the millionth text message: replenishment is not a reward you earn after you've given enough. It's the design. It's how God built you to function. A tree doesn't apologize for drawing water from the soil before it bears fruit — it *has* to. And you are no different. The life that flows from you to your family has to come from somewhere. If the roots are dry, the fruit will be too. You gotta stop running dry! The K.I.S.S. ~ Stop running D.R.Y.! So what does it look like to stop running dry? D — DETECT Your Empty Indicator. What's the first sign that you're running on fumes? Snapping at the kids over something small? Crying in the car before you pull into the driveway? Dreading the morning before your head even hits the pillow? Every woman has a signal — that early warning light on the dashboard of her soul. Name yours. Write it down. When you can recognize it early, you can respond before you hit empty. R — REFILL with One Sustainable Practice. This isn't about booking a spa weekend. It's about building one real, repeatable refill into your week. A 20-minute walk while the kids are at practice. A chapter of a book before bed. Coffee alone on a Saturday morning before anyone else wakes up. Schedule it like you would a pediatrician appointment—because it is that important. You wouldn't skip your child's checkup. Don't skip your own replenishment either. Y — YIELD to Truth Over the Lie. Every time the thought "a good mom gives everything" surfaces — and it will — replace it. Say it out loud if you have to: "A whole mom gives from a place of fullness, not obligation."  The enemy wants you to believe that emptiness equals devotion. But God's Word says renewal equals strength. Yield to what's true, not to what the world has told you to carry. You were not designed to run on empty. Rest is not retreat — it's how you keep going. — Kristianne Wargo It's how you show up for bedtime stories without resentment. It's how you hold the crying baby and still have something left for the conversation with your husband. It's how you teach your children — not just with your words but with your life — that wholeness matters; raising them well by living whole. Your kids don't need a mama who's running on fumes and calling it love. They need a mama who's full enough to overflow. And that overflow starts with one brave, holy decision: to stop glorifying empty and start honoring the way God made you. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

There comes a point in every season where you have to stop and take an honest look at what you've been carrying. Not everything that weighed you down was meant to travel this far with you. And today, right here, right now — it's time to release what buried you. But some of what pressed you into the ground was soil. God placed it there with purpose. It was the covering you needed, so the seed inside you could crack open, stretch its roots, and begin to grow into something only He could design. Yet some of it was never soil at all. It was just weight. Dead weight. And you've been dragging it along as if letting it go means letting go of who you are. You are not letting go of who you are! Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #Inspiration #CreateYourNow #DailyMotivation Think about the things you carry into every new morning. The guilt from a chapter you've already repented for but keep rereading. The expectations someone else wrote for your life — expectations that never had your name on them to begin with. The grief you hold so tightly because releasing it feels like forgetting. None of that is fuel, friend. It's friction. And friction will wear you down long before it ever moves you forward. God never asked you to run this race with your arms full of yesterday. Hebrews 12:1 says it plain: "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." Throw it off. Don't set it down gently or tuck it in your back pocket just in case. Throw it off — like something that has no right to be on you anymore. Because it doesn't. So how do you know the difference between what God is using and what you've been carrying that was never yours to hold? Start here: what God uses grows you. It challenges you, yes. It stretches you past comfort, absolutely. But there's fruit in it. There's movement. There's a stirring in your spirit that whispers, "This is hard, but I'm becoming something." What was never yours to hold just exhausts you. It replays the same scenes. It keeps you circling the same guilt, the same fear, the same narrative that says you'll never be enough. That's not the voice of your Father. That's the echo of a lie you were never supposed to memorize. The K.I.S.S. ~ Release what you buried! Old guilt tells you that who you were disqualifies who you're becoming. But God already handled that. He doesn't bring up what He's already buried in grace — so why do you keep exhuming it? Someone else's expectations tell you that unless you look a certain way, achieve a certain thing, or follow a certain path, you've failed. But their blueprint was never your calling. And grief — grief is sacred, and no one is asking you to stop loving what you've lost. But there is a difference between honoring what was and refusing to live in what is. You can carry love forward without carrying pain as your identity. Lysa TerKeurst put it this way: "You can't hold on to what God is asking you to lay down and still receive what He has for you next." God has something for you next. But your hands have to be open to receive it. And they can't be open if they're still gripping what should have been released two seasons ago. This is your permission — not that you need it, but sometimes it helps to hear it — to put it down. The shame. The striving. The grief that has overstayed its welcome. The version of yourself that someone else demanded you be. Lay it down. Not because it didn't matter, but because it doesn't get to define what comes next. You are not the sum of what buried you. You are the life that pushed through it. And that push? That's God. That's His hand beneath the soil, guiding the root, directing the reach, whispering over you, "Keep going. I'm not done with you yet." So release what buried you — and watch what He grows in its place. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

In every garden, the gardeners watch carefully for the first buds to appear. Not the full bloom. Not the sturdy stem. But the bud. It's the plant's most vulnerable part because it hasn't hardened yet. It's new and exposed, full of potential, yet not strong enough to withstand a late frost or a careless hand. And if you've been doing the interior work lately — pulling up old roots, tilling hard ground, planting seeds of faith in places that used to grow nothing but fear — then you may be approaching a season of tending what's tender. Because what's beginning to emerge in you right now is holy. And it's fragile. And it needs your fierce, unapologetic protection. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #WellspringWednesday #CreateYourNow #HealthAndWellness Here's what most people won't tell you about growth: the most dangerous season isn't the waiting. It's the almost. It's when the green starts to push through, and you can finally see something changing — but it hasn't taken full shape yet. That's when the voices get loudest. Not just the ones outside of you, though those come too. The ones inside. The whisper that says, Who do you think you are? The comparison that sneaks in through a screen and steals your peace before you've even finished your morning coffee. The well-meaning comment from someone who only knows the old version of you and can't quite make sense of what's different. You feel it, don't you? That strange tension between excitement and exposure. Between finally and what if I can't sustain this? That tension is normal. It doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. It means you're doing it all. Scripture tells us God begins a good work—and He is faithful to complete it (Philippians 1:6). But notice the language. He begins it. Which means there is a beginning stage. A budding stage. A season where what He's building in you is real but not yet finished. And in that season, you are not called to perform your growth for an audience. You're called to guard it. The K.I.S.S. ~ Guard the new growth! Think about how a gardener handles a new bud. She doesn't yank it open to prove it's going to bloom. She doesn't invite the whole neighborhood over to watch it unfold in real time. She adjusts the conditions. She watches for threats. She keeps the soil moist and the stakes in place. She tends. That's your assignment right now. Not every space you've been occupying deserves access to what God is growing in you. Not every voice that has spoken into your life up to this point has earned the right to speak into this next chapter. And that's not bitterness — it's wisdom. Proverbs 4:23 says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Guarding isn't hiding. It isn't shrinking back. It's recognizing that some things are too sacred to leave unprotected, and some seasons require a smaller circle and a quieter rhythm. You don't owe anyone a front-row seat to your transformation. You don't have to explain the shift before you've even fully lived it. And you certainly don't need to defend what God is doing in you to people who haven't been invited into the process. Let them wonder. Let it unfold. Let the bud become what it was always meant to become — in its own time, under the care of the One who planted it. So where does that leave you this week? What would it look like to stop exposing the tender things to harsh conditions — and start treating your own growth with the same gentleness you'd give a garden? What does it look like in real life? 1. LIMIT Your Exposure this week to one voice, space, or habit that consistently makes you doubt what God is doing in you. You already know what it is. Maybe it's the social media account that always leaves you feeling behind. Maybe it's the group text that drains more than it fills. Maybe it's the internal habit of replaying old criticism every time you try something new. You don't have to make a dramatic exit or burn anything down. You just have to create a little distance — enough breathing room for the new thing to keep growing without something toxic pressing against it. Mute the account. Step back from the conversation. Set a boundary with your own thought life. One intentional limit this week can change the atmosphere around your becoming. 2. NURTURE the New Thing by spending time with someone who sees and speaks to who you're becoming, not just who you've been. New growth needs the right environment, and part of that environment is the people around you. This week, reach out to someone who calls out the woman you're growing into — not the one you used to be. Someone who doesn't try to pull you back into old patterns because that version was more comfortable for them. You need voices around you who water what God is doing, not people who keep you small because your growth makes them uneasy. One phone call. One coffee. One honest conversation with someone who makes you feel more like yourself, not less. 3. ASK God to Show You what needs protecting right now — and then protect it fiercely and without apology. This one takes courage, because protection often looks like saying no. No to overexplaining. No to performing. No to letting everyone in on something that's still forming. Sit with God this week and ask Him plainly: What are You growing in me that I need to guard right now? And when He shows you — a dream, a shift, a healing, a conviction, a calling — treat it like the tender bud it is. Don't pluck it open for someone else's timeline. Don't shrink it down to fit a room that was never meant to hold it. Guard it. Fiercely. Without apology. You were not meant to bloom under pressure from everyone else's opinions. You were meant to bloom under the faithful hand of a God who started something beautiful in you and has every intention of finishing it. So tend what's tender. Protect what's forming. And trust that what He's doing doesn't need your defense — it just needs your devotion. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

You woke up this morning, and before your feet even hit the floor, there was already noise. Not the alarm. Not the kids. Something deeper, quieter, meaner — a thought that slid in before you had the chance to decide what kind of day this was going to be. And if you're not careful, that thought will try to run the whole show. But you don't have to let it. Today is your invitation to refuse the verdict, because you were named before the noise ever began. WOW!! Sit with that for a minute. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #Inspiration #CreateYourNow #DailyMotivation Every single one of us has a thought life. And if we're being real, some of what lives in that thought life is not pretty. There are thoughts that accuse. Thoughts that shame. Thoughts that drag up the worst version of yesterday and try to convince you that's who you are today. You're not doing enough. You're falling behind. Everyone else has it figured out and you're just faking it. Sound too familiar? THINK NOW: A thought that passes through your mind is not a truth that was spoken over your life. Those two things could not be more different. One is noise. The other is a name. And you need to know the difference, because the enemy will work overtime to blur the line between them. He wants you to hear an accusation and call it an identity. He wants you to feel shame and call it a fact. He wants you to mistake his whisper for God's verdict. But he doesn't get that power. He never did. Imagine you're standing in a courtroom and someone is reading off a list of charges against you. Every mistake, every failure, every moment you wish you could take back — it's all right there, spoken out loud. And just when the weight of it feels like it might crush you, the Judge stands up and says, Case dismissed. No condemnation. Not now. Not ever. Romans 8:1 — "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." It's not about less condemnation on your good days or even a lighter sentence when you've been trying really hard. It's NO condemnation. Case closed. The gavel came down. And it came down in your favor — not because of anything you did, but because of everything He already did. The K.I.S.S. ~ Refuse the verdict! So what does that mean for you today? Right now? Well, that thought that tried to define you this morning doesn't get the last word. The shame that keeps circling back around doesn't get to sit at your table. You get to choose how you show up in your own life — and you get to show up as who God says you are, not as who the enemy tries to convince you that you've become. You are chosen. You are loved. You are called. Before the foundation of the world, God knew your name — and it was not failure. It wasn't not enough. It wasn't too far gone. It was beloved. It was daughter. It was mine. That's the name that was spoken over you before the noise ever started. And that name doesn't change based on what crossed your mind at two o'clock in the morning. So the next time a dark thought shows up and tries to hand you a verdict you were never meant to carry, stand in the truth of who you are. Open your mouth and say it out loud if you have to: I am not what passed through my mind. I am what my Father declared over my life. And His word doesn't return void. Because you get to choose. Every morning, every evening, every moment, every breath — you get to choose whose voice you agree with. The noise will always be there. The accusations will knock on the door. But you are not obligated to answer. You are not required to let them in. And you are certainly not defined by them. You were named before any of it. And the One who named you is not taking it back. Rise with truth today. Refuse the verdict that was never yours. And walk forward knowing truly that the only voice with the authority to define you already spoke. And what He said was enough. That's how you create your now. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Some lies announce themselves. They crash into your day with a voice so sharp you know immediately something is wrong. But the most dangerous lies aren't shouted out loud. They whisper. They've been whispering so long you stopped recognizing them as anything other than your own voice — and that is exactly what makes the lies that feel like home so hard to leave behind. You know the ones. I'm not enough. It's too late for me. Everyone else has it figured out. They don't feel like attacks. They feel like facts. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #MindsetMonday #CreateYourNow #PersonalDevelopment They've lived in you for so long — through rejection, through loss, through seasons that knocked the wind out of you — that they've settled in like furniture. You don't even bump into them anymore. You just walk around them. But here's what I need you to hear today: just because a thought has been with you for years doesn't mean it belongs to you. As Jennie Allen reminds us in Get Out of Your Head, the most dangerous lies aren't the ones we fight — they're the ones we never think to question. And she's right. When a lie has lived in you long enough, it stops sounding like an intruder. It sounds like you. It wears your voice, carries your memories, and uses your worst moments as evidence. Think about it. Nobody sat you down one day and said, "Here — believe this about yourself." It happened slowly. A rejection in middle school. A careless comment from someone you trusted. A failure that confirmed what you were already afraid of. And then one day, without ever making a conscious decision, you accepted it. You stopped questioning it. You started building your life around it. That's how lies become home. Not because they're true, but because they're familiar. But God never called you to live in a house built on lies. John 8:32 says, "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." Free. Not managed. Not coped with. Free. The truth doesn't just challenge the lie — it dismantles it. But you have to be willing to name what you've been carrying before you can set it down. And here's where it gets beautifully personal. The truth God speaks over you isn't generic. It's specific. It's intimate. 1 John 3:1 says, "See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!" That's not a suggestion. That's a declaration. You are not what the lie says. You are what your Father says. And He says you are His. So let it go, and name it to break it. The K.I.S.S. ~ Name it to break it! So let me ask you this: if someone handed you a script right now — every negative thing you believe about yourself, written in black and white — would you hand it to your daughter? Would you read it over your best friend? Then why are you still reading it over yourself? It's time to call the lies out. Not next month. Not when you feel ready. Right now. Here's your Keep It Simple Strategy for this week. DOWNLOAD HERE! 1. Tell the Truth about the Lies. Grab a journal or even the back of an envelope — whatever's close. Write down the three statements you most often say about yourself when no one is listening. Not the polished version. Not the one you'd share in a small group. The raw, unfiltered script that runs on repeat when you're alone in the car or staring at the ceiling at 2 a.m. Be honest — don't soften them. You can't evict a lie you won't name. Seeing it in your own handwriting is the first act of courage. 2. Let God Talk Back. Next to each lie, write what God says about you instead — and use Scripture as your source, not your feelings. Feelings shift; His Word doesn't. If the lie is "I'm not enough," counter it with Ephesians 2:10: "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works." If it's "It's too late," try Jeremiah 29:11 or Isaiah 43:19.  If it's "Nobody really sees me," anchor into 1 John 3:1: "See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!" Don't rush this step. Let the contrast sit on the page — lies on the left, truth on the right — and notice how different they sound when they're side by side. 3. Replace One Lie — Out Loud. You don't have to conquer all three this week. Pick the one that has the deepest grip — the lie that shows up most often or hurts the most — and commit to actively replacing it. Every single time it surfaces, speak the truth out loud. In your kitchen. In the car. In the mirror. Your ears need to hear your mouth agree with God, even if your voice shakes while you say it. Repetition isn't weakness — it's retraining. You didn't learn the lie overnight, and you won't unlearn it overnight either. But every time you speak truth over that lie, you loosen its hold. The lies you've been living with don't deserve the space they've been taking up. They moved in uninvited, and they've overstayed their welcome. You have the authority — through Christ — to show them the door. Not because you're strong enough on your own, but because the One who lives in you is stronger than the voice that's been lying to you. You don't have to have it all figured out by Friday. You just have to start. One lie. One truth. One brave, shaky declaration spoken out loud in your kitchen while the coffee brews. You are enough! "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

There's an old saying that you become like the five people you spend the most time with. And while that might sound like something from a self-help book on a clearance rack, there's actually deep, biblical truth tucked inside it. The company you keep matters more than most of us are willing to admit. And it's not because the people around us define us, but because they shape the atmosphere we breathe, the thoughts we entertain, and the steps we're willing to take. And if we're serious about walking in wisdom, we have to be honest about who's walking beside us. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #SweetSpirit #CreateYourNow #SoulfulSunday Proverbs 13:20 puts it plainly: "Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm." There's no gray area there. No wiggle room. The company you keep doesn't just affect your mood on a Tuesday afternoon — it affects the trajectory of your life. Wisdom isn't only something we read or study. Wisdom is something we absorb through proximity. We catch it the way we catch courage — by being close to someone who carries it. And then Paul echoes this truth centuries later in his letter to the Corinthians: "Do not be misled: bad company corrupts good character." He wasn't writing to people living recklessly. He was writing to believers — people who loved God but were being slowly pulled off course by the voices around them. That's the part that should make us pause. You don't have to abandon your faith to drift from it. Sometimes you just have to surround yourself with people who quietly make it easier not to grow. Now let's talk about Ruth — because her story is one of the most beautiful pictures of what it looks like to choose your company wisely. When Naomi told her daughters-in-law to go back to their families, it would've been perfectly reasonable for Ruth to leave. She had every right. Every logical reason. Orpah kissed Naomi goodbye and turned around, and nobody blamed her. But Ruth? Ruth held on tighter. She said, "Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God." That wasn't just loyalty. That was wisdom wrapped in love. Ruth looked at Naomi — a grieving widow with empty hands and a broken heart — and she didn't see a liability. She saw a woman whose faith had weathered the storm. She saw someone worth walking with. And that decision, that one holy choice to stay close to a wise woman, changed the entire course of Ruth's life. It led her to Bethlehem. It led her to Boaz. It led her to the lineage of Jesus Christ. Think about that for a moment. Ruth didn't end up in the genealogy of our Savior because she had a five-year plan. She ended up there because she chose the right company. She attached herself to someone whose life pointed toward God — and God honored that. The K.I.S.S. ~ The company you keep! So here's the question that deserves more than a quick answer: Who are you walking with? Not who's in your contact list. Not who you wave to at church or laugh with at brunch. Who are the people shaping your inner world? Who do you call when the bottom falls out? Whose voice plays on repeat in your head when you're making a hard decision? Those are the people who matter — because those are the ones influencing the direction you're actually walking in. Some of us have been pouring into friendships that quietly pull us away from the woman God is calling us to become. Not because those people are bad, but because they're comfortable. And comfort, when it replaces growth, becomes its own kind of cage. Wisdom asks us to be brave enough to evaluate — with grace, not judgment — whether the people closest to us are sharpening our faith or dulling it. This isn't about cutting people off coldly or ranking your relationships like a corporate org chart. It's about being intentional. It's about recognizing that who you walk with will determine where you end up. And if you want to end up somewhere that honors the calling on your life, you need people around you who remind you of that calling — even when you're tempted to forget it. Ruth didn't just tag along with Naomi for the company. She committed to a journey that required sacrifice, humility, and faith she couldn't yet see the fruit of. But she trusted that walking with a woman of God would lead her somewhere good. And it did. Beyond anything she could have imagined. The wisdom here isn't complicated, but it is convicting. Walk with the wise, and you will become wise. Walk with those who take their faith seriously, and you'll find your own faith deepening in ways you didn't plan. Walk with people who speak life, who point you to Scripture when you're spiraling, who love you enough to tell you the truth — and watch how your path straightens. You were never meant to walk this journey alone, and you were never meant to walk it with just anyone. The company you keep is one of the most important decisions you'll make — not once, but every single day. Choose wisely. Choose people who make you want to be more of who God created you to be. And then be that person for someone else. Because wisdom doesn't just sit on a shelf. It walks. And it walks best when it walks together. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.

You can love your spouse deeply, consistently, and sincerely, yet they still feel unloved. This has nothing to do with doing it right or wrong; it's about speaking your love language instead of theirs. How you express love matters, especially when nobody is keeping score. So speak your spouse's language. Most of us default to loving people the way we want to be loved. It makes sense. If words of encouragement fill your cup, you naturally pour words into your spouse. If you feel most connected through quality time, you assume sitting together on the couch is the ultimate act of devotion. Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com #RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage But what if your spouse's cup has a completely different shape? What if the love you are pouring is spilling right over the edges because the container does not match? This is not about doing more. It is about doing it differently. Think about it this way. Imagine someone speaking to you passionately, urgently, with everything in them — but in a language you have never heard. You can see the effort. You can feel the emotion. But you cannot understand a single word. That is what happens in a marriage when two people are expressing love fluently — but in two completely different love languages. Whether it is words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, receiving gifts, or physical touch — every person has a primary way they receive love. And your spouse's way may look nothing like yours. Here is where it gets uncomfortable. It is not your spouse's job to translate your love into something they can feel. It is your job to learn how they hear it — and then love them that way on purpose. That does not mean your way of loving is wrong. It means it is yours. And marriage is not about loving for yourself. It is about loving for the person standing next to you. Philippians 2:3–4 puts it plainly: "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." That is the posture of a marriage that lasts. Not "here is what I need from you," but "tell me what love sounds like in your world, and I will learn to speak it." Now, does that mean your needs do not matter? Absolutely not. This goes both ways. But someone has to go first. Someone has to be the one who stops assuming and starts asking. Why not let that someone be you? And honestly? Most couples have never even had the conversation. You have been married for years — maybe decades — and you have never sat across from each other and said, "What makes you feel most loved by me?" We plan vacations. We talk about finances. We negotiate bedtimes and grocery lists. But we skip the one conversation that could change the temperature of our entire home. "Love spoken in the wrong language still sounds like silence." ~ Kristianne Wargo And silence in a marriage — especially an unintentional one — creates distance that nobody meant to build. So how do we close that gap? The K.I.S.S. ~ Learn to love fluently What do you do fluently now? What is working and what is not? If you are willing to experiment with how to love your spouse, it will strengthen your marriage from the bottom up. 1. CONVERSE with your spouse. Ask your spouse directly: "What makes you feel most loved by me?" Do not assume you already know. Their answer might surprise you — and it will certainly guide you. Sit with it. Write it down if you need to. This is not a quiz. It is an invitation to know them more deeply than you did yesterday. 2. IDENTIFY your own love language and share it. Marriage is a two-way street. Let your spouse know what fills your cup so they are not guessing either. When you both have the words for what you need, you stop playing a guessing game that nobody wins. 3. PRACTICE one deliberate act in your spouse's love language every day this week. If their language is acts of service, handle something on their list without being asked. If it is words of affirmation, leave a note where they will find it. If it is physical touch, reach for their hand before they reach for yours. Small and consistent beats grand and occasional every time. Fluency does not happen overnight. You are going to fumble. You are going to default back to your own language because it is comfortable and it is what you know. That is okay. Love is patient, love is kind — and love is also a practice. 1 Corinthians 13 reminds us that love does not insist on its own way. It does not keep a record of who did what first or who got it right. It just keeps showing up. And that is all this is. Showing up — not with what is easy for you, but with what matters to your spouse. Rainer Maria Rilke once wrote, "The highest form of love is to be the protector of another person's solitude." Think about that for a moment. The highest form of love is not filling every silence or fixing every problem. Sometimes it is simply knowing your person well enough to give them exactly what their soul needs — even when it looks nothing like what yours would ask for. That is fluency. That is what it means to speak your spouse's language. QUESTION: What language has your spouse been speaking that you might have been missing? And what would it look like to answer them back in the one they actually hear? You do not need a perfect plan. You need a willing heart and an open mouth. Willing to ask Willing to listen Willing to love differently than you have been loved before Until next time — keep falling in love all over again. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   🔔 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https://createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https://form.jotform.com/62988215824163) 🙏  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https://pray.com) 🎥  Create Your Now on YouTube (https://youtube.com/createyournow) 🎧 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. 🎶  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http://www.iheart.com/show/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best/) ✍️  [email protected]  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http://www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.