Ep 171: Parenting and Birthing Gently with Caitlyn Doerksen
How do we go about decision-making in pregnancy and parenthood? Do we float along on the wave of current culture, or is there possibly another way?
This week we’re speaking with Caitlyn Doerksen, a wife of almost seven years, a mom of 3 kids, who is passionate about all things surrounding the home. Home schooling, home birth, and a dream to one day soon home stead. She has such a beautiful way of looking at and interacting with her family, and I know you’re going to gain so much insight from this incredible episode.
It’s okay to do things differently from other families and to focus on works in your family’s culture. Just because your aunt or mother in law or neighbor did things one way doesn’t mean you have to follow suit. It’s not disrespectful to choose your own path. I’m sure many of you resonate with that already– I mean, we’ve probably all had the experience of a little backlash to our birthing decisions, am I right?
Next, I loved the way Caitlyn truly tuned into her intuition. She didn’t push the voice away, she leaned in and listened harder. She had her husband pray over her and encourage her, and together they worked on honing in on their God-given parental intuitions. We were designed to disciple our babies, and when we tune out the noise and tune into what is working for our family, I think we often times do know how to do that so beautifully well.
And finally, let’s discuss the beautiful balance of Caitlyn’s births. What did we learn? Well, we learned that birth CAN be exactly what you want, pray for, ask for, envision, meditate upon… It can be. There is so much power and excitement and thrill in that! It happened for Caitlyn three times, despite difficult external circumstances with her most recent birth. And now… on to the flip side. Not everyone is going to experience this, and if your mind is SET on having a very specific experience that does not pan out that way, it can sometimes lead to disappointment or a fear that maybe you didn’t do something right, or you didn’t deserve a good birth or, or, or. And just like Caitlyn so beautifully affirmed, that is straight up false. I like to remind myself that every birth has a lesson for us. Sometimes those lessons go down easy like a spoonful of honey, and others feel a bit more abrasive. But, no matter the specific events our birth holds, please remember… we are the one who chooses how we get to integrate the experience. We can choose what our birth means to us, and we can choose to approach birth with the knowledge that however it unfolds, there is beauty in it. I hope that makes sense. Every mother, every baby, every labor are different. But whatever our labor brings us, we can take those lessons and apply them to our lives, to our motherhood, to grow and stretch us in the most beautiful ways.
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