The Place We Find Ourselves

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1771 reviews
This podcast has
114 episodes
Date created
Last published
Average duration
40 min.
Release period
12 days


The Place We Find Ourselves podcast features private practice therapist Adam Young (LCSW, MDiv) and interview guests as they discuss all things related to story, trauma, attachment, and interpersonal neurobiology. Listen in as Adam unpacks how trauma and abuse impact the heart and mind, as well as how to navigate the path toward healing, wholeness, and restoration. Interview episodes give you a sacred glimpse into the real-life stories of guests who have engaged their own experiences of trauma and abuse. Drawing from the work of neuroscientists such as Allan Schore, Dan Siegel, and Bessel van der Kolk, as well as Christian thought leaders Dan Allender and John Eldredge, this podcast will equip and inspire you to engage your own stories of harm in deep, transformative ways.

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Why It’s So Important To Tell Your Story To An Attuned Listener with Curt Thompson
I am joined today by Christian neuroscientist Curt Thompson. In this vulnerable conversation, Curt and I talk about: why our brains change when we share our story with another human being who is attuned to us, why engaging your story is the single best way to become a better parent, and why it’s so important to pay attention to the younger parts of ourselves.
Making Sense of Your Story: Why It's Necessary To Name Intentionality Part 2
This is part 2 of a discussion on the necessity of naming intentional harm. You can’t heal until your brain has constructed an accurate and coherent autobiographical narrative of your life. Today I introduce the idea of antisocial empathy, which is a very important concept from David Schnarch’s book Brain Talk. I also talk about how to heal when traumatic mind-mapping results in gaps in your memory.
Making Sense of Your Story: Why It’s Necessary to Name Intentionality Part 1
Naming intentionality matters because if you are unsure about whether or not the other person meant to hurt you, it will be very difficult for you to heal from your wounds. This is because you can’t heal until your brain has constructed an accurate and coherent autobiographical narrative of your life: the narrative has to be true and it has to make sense. Drawing from David Schnarch’s book Brain Talk, I explain two important concepts: mind-mapping and traumatic mind-mapping. Mind-mapping refers to your ability to map out the thoughts and feelings of another person. Traumatic mind-mapping is a collapse of your brain’s normal mind mapping abilities that occurs when you are mind-mapping someone and what you see is terrible.
The Power of Compassion and Curiosity Toward Ourselves with Aundi Kolber
I am joined today by Aundi Kolber, the author of Try Softer: A Fresh Approach to Move Us out of Anxiety, Stress, and Survival Mode — and into a Life of Connection and Joy. We discuss the importance of paying attention to what is happening inside your body, as well as having a posture of compassion and curiosity toward your internal experience. We often respond to our life experiences by “trying harder.” Aundi invites us into the very counter-cultural practice of trying softer. 
Redeeming Heartache: How Goodness Can Come Out Of Trauma
Bonus episode! Cathy Loerzel and I dive into why it’s crucial to take your wounds seriously, and how your wounds lead to the “orphan experience,” “stranger experience,” and/or “widow experience.” We also talk about what redemption looks like for each of these three types of wounding. Jesus takes our experiences of trauma and redeems them. That is, God creates glory, meaning and calling out of the very things that were designed to hurt us. If you want to better understand what redemption can look like for you, Cathy and I will be co-leading a live Redeeming Heartache event on May 21, 2022, in Fort Collins, CO. You can sign up here.
How Do You Move Through Past Trauma?
Jerry Sittser is the author of A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows Through Loss. He is no stranger to trauma. Jerry and I cover the following topics in this episode: our tendency to try to muscle our way through pain; how adversity in our present life invites us to return to our past story; and how to keep going when facing sadness, anger, exhaustion, and longing.
Anxiety: What It Is and How To Respond To It
Anxiety can be so debilitating. But what exactly is it? Why do we feel anxious? And how can we address it? Anxiety is what you feel when you are avoiding important unfelt emotions. And your anxiety is almost always related to some particular part of your story. 
Your Story And Your Sexuality
I am joined today by Jay Stringer to talk about the relationship between our current sexual difficulties and our attachment histories. At some point in our lives, each of us will encounter difficulties in our sexual life. It might be the compulsive use of unwanted sexual behavior or a struggle to locate any sexual desire at all. Sexual struggles are rooted in our stories—and, very often, our stories of attachment to our primary caretakers and adverse childhood experiences. If you want to explore this material in more depth, please sign up for the Sexual Attachment Conference on Saturday, April 30. You can sign up here. 
107 Racial Trauma: What's Going On? Part 2
This is part 2 of my interview with Wendell Moss about racial trauma. Today we continue to discuss the importance of naming what has been true of the past so that we might be free from it. We also begin to talk about what the path toward healing looks like, including the role of lament in the healing process.
106 Racial Trauma: What's Going On? Part 1
I am joined today by Wendell Moss. Wendell is a therapist, an instructor at the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology, and part of The Allender Center teaching staff. We discuss a blog post Wendell wrote for The Allender Center called, “Racial Trauma: The Marks We Bear.” Topics covered include the importance of naming what has been true of our collective past and what is required for healing to begin to occur.
105 Complicity: Why Sexual Abuse Is So Damaging and How To Address It
Complicity often haunts people with a history of trauma more than anything else. The essence of complicity is the sense that I volitionally participated in my own abuse. In today’s episode, I outline four ways in which we may feel complicit in our abuse, and then talk about how to address the feeling of complicity by blessing arousal.
When The Church Harms You
Rebecca Wheeler Walston joins me today to talk about how she came to engage her story in more depth. She also shares a story of significant harm at the hands of fellow Christians. It is a story of harm from those in a position of spiritual authority. Rebecca and I talk about how hard it is to make sense of experiences of spiritual abuse. We also ponder the role that envy may have played in her story.

Podcast Reviews

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4.9 out of 5
1771 reviews
WifeyKayla 2022/06/01
I listened to the two episodes specifically about talking to your kids about sex, and I felt some much more prepared for those conversations!
mediumashlyn 2022/05/20
Healing on all levels
Love this podcast! I just found it and it's all I can listen to now.
Jazmin_Azalea 2022/04/26
Very helpful.
Listened to one episode and I’m hooked. I love learning about my brain and why things are the way they are. Learning psychology and how to heal one ep...
Christalone89 2022/04/01
Incredibly helpful
The tone of this podcast is incredibly helpful. I have learned so much about myself and how I’ve dealt with my story through this podcast. I’ve learne...
tirvine 2022/02/20
So educational
I’ve only listened to a few episodes so far, and Adam explains trauma in a clear, succinct, and educational way. I’ve had my fair share of therapy for...
cjditjcjjsjtjf 2022/02/27
Who determines what reparations look like? Because I’m white I owe a black person something for how his ancestors were treated? If I have wronged a p...
dimplekids 2022/02/16
Well explained and incredibly helpful
As someone whose seen a therapist for three years no, I can say that Adam thoughtfully and carefully explains trauma, attachment, relationships, and ...
KNSMP 2022/02/17
Excellent but….
This is truly an excellent podcast with deep insights to what the Bible really means to our every day lives in relationships. However, I am surprised ...
Fluffygooey 2022/02/06
This podcast is inspired
Every now and then I hear a speaker that is so insightful there is no doubt the Holy Spirit has provided wisdom and insight. I recommend listening wit...
Fantastic resource 2022/01/31
Listen to How Healing Happens Part 1-3
I’m so grateful for Adam Young and his team who work so hard to give us the depth and relevance of the Gospel in this manner.


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