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Aquarius – Stoner Astrological Horoscope

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Rating
★★★★★
4.6
from
5 reviews
This podcast has
63 episodes
Language
English
Date created
2017/02/27
Latest episode
2022/05/29
Average duration
5 min.
Release period
31 days

Description

Air Sign – The Water-Bearer – January 20 – February 18 The stoner Aquarius is the fired up activist within the smoke circle. They are the stoner star sign most likely to bring conspiracy theories to the smoke session conversation. Although eccentric and nonconformist in their lifestyle and attitude, the stoner Aquarius is always ready to match bowls and toke time for others. The stoner water-bearer always keeps a portable smoke kit on hand. They never know when a protest might break out, or the next turn in their eccentric adventure. These terrestrial tokers are considered aloof by many star signs. With all the large changes required in the world, who has time for pleasantries! The Bubba Kush Indica strain is a perfect match for the complex Aquarius. Large perspectives and elaborate concepts are not lost on this stoner. However, meditative smoke sessions with the sacred herb can ground the stoner Aqaurius, and help them to slow down to appreciate immediate surroundings.

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Aquarius Stoner Horoscope June
2022/05/29
Stoner Aquarius most who know you would consider you to be a generally open minded being. But this June, with a little help from the sacred herb, and a few meditative smoke sessions, you will be able to fully awaken your third eye sight. Whether you are working on an important project at work, or picking up on the vibes of your cannabis companions during your weekly smoke sesh, your enhanced attention to even the smallest details will be a big help to everyone. Just be careful my burdened Water-Bearer.  Even if you are seeing things clearly from a lifted perspective, you don’t want your confidence and clarity to come across as being condescending. Sometimes it takes passing the peace pipe around the circle a few times in order to get everyone on the same level. These are the times when the connection of cannabis can help to calm everyone, and be the catalyst needed to open the lines of communication. Just be aware stoner Aquarius:  There may be a few conversations this season that should be more talking and less toking.  Be on the lookout for a partner-in-chronic whose vibe is feeling a little off. You might be ready to blaze into the Summer sesh. Ready to pack the pipe, grab your sticky stash, and hit the open road.  Maybe it’s to light up at your favorite smoke spot for old times' sake.  Or, perhaps you’re feeling adventurous and have no particular destination in mind. However, there is someone in your inner smoke circle who isn’t quite prepared for the hot and hazy days of Summer ahead.  Rest assured stoner Aquarius, this person will get their groove back, in no small part because of your kind words and listening ear. But, while it’s great to supply a bud loving buddy with good green, just remember sometimes being a good friend is all that a person really needs.
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope May
2022/04/29
They say April showers bring May flowers. And you can be certain this month, stoner Aquarius, will be full of all kinds of flowers!  The kind that smell good, the kind you smoke, and the kind that smell good when you smoke them! While other signs are trying to feel their way through the lingering cosmic clouds this Spring, you will get to light up and breathe easy throughout the rest of the season. Stoner Aquarius, you have the Sun to thank for the warming days, but this month, it is the celestial alignment that ensures this May will be a chronically good one. Stoner Aquarius, since you will be the one whose spirit feels light and shines bright, it will be up to you to serve as a gleaming guide to your fellow terrestrial cannanauts. Your positivity will be a beacon of calm to all your road weary cannabis companions.  Allow your shining aura to show them the way to a more peaceful destination. And if any of your cannabis companions do fall behind, they will always find their way back by following the scent of that sweet sinsemilla. You don’t have to wait for summer to hit the trails my wandering Water Bearer. If the sun is shining, you should be out exploring!  Grab your travel piece, some grade-A ganja, and take your stoney sessions back to your favorite outdoors smoke spots. The Full Moon happens on the 16th this month. It will be a great night to get together with all your partners-in-chronic to celebrate the Lunar Eclipse. You don’t have to go wild stoner Aquarius, just toke the time to light up, look to the sky, and let everyone’s troubles float away with the smoke.
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope April
2022/03/30
Stoner Aquarius, if in March you finally felt like you were heating up, April finds you blazing bright, and moving full speed ahead. It’s no longer about breaking out of your funk, this month the goal is to keep your groove growing. The winning recipe this season is pretty simple:  Keep doing more of what’s been working, and let the things that aren’t flowing, float away with the smoke. This includes sticking with the strains that uplift and invigorate you, while avoiding those that call you back to the sluggish sanctuary of your couch. It all depends upon the kind of motivation you are looking for my ambitious Water-Bearer. Here are a few strains to seek out and toke up this month, depending upon your mood! Super Lemon Haze:  For when you are looking for inspiration, or wanting to unleash your creativity. Just like biting into the most sour citrus fruit, this strain will have you feeling invigorated and thinking:  ‘What can’t I do?!’ Strawberry Cough Diesel:  Don’t be fooled by the name, this strain can be an amazingly smooth smoke.  Stoner Aquarius you can expect a full-bodied warm feeling leaving you maximally relaxed, while also freeing your mind to soar to new heights. Harlequin GDP:  A personal favorite, and recommendation for those who have been skeptical of Sativa dominant varieties in the past. Never too racy, this strain is an excellent specimen for when you are looking for that ‘mellow yellow’ kind of vibe. This one is for when you want to get in the zone without feeling overzealous. Of course, stoner Aquarius, you can smoke any kind and variety of cannabis you want. But, if I could offer one piece of advice this month it would be:  No matter what dutchie you choose to puff on, know that it will be even better when you get to pass it to a cannabis companion sitting on your left-hand side.
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope March
2022/02/27
Stoner Aquarius, if your cannabis companions want to find you this month, all they will have to do is look up! It may be true that you’ve been toking it low and slow up to this point, but as long as you aim for the stars, you will find yourself blazing to new heights in March.  Your upward trajectory will have your fellow terrestrial travelers watching you closely.  Don’t fret my judicious Water-Bearer, observers might have red-eyes, but their stares aren’t critical. Actually, it is quite the opposite; you will have the admiring gazes of all who come into your orbit. Because of this universal admiration, you will have the opportunity to raise up those around you. So, you will need to lead by example stoner Aquarius. This means top shelf buds only this month! You don’t want others to see you smoking sad, shwaggy green. Remember, my chronic-loving Aquarius:  Friends don’t let their cannabis companions smoke bunk weed! In fact, accumulating the best green bud will coincide with a cosmic mission to collect green paper as well. It takes effort to accumulate the sacred green as well as the matrix money.  But you are up to the challenge stoner Aquarius. With all the prosperity you can expect this March, it will be important to remember the sacred stoner mantra:  Sharing IS caring. Be mindful of your spending stoner Aquarius.  You don’t need to go overboard and burn through your stash and savings just to please others. The point is to help when you can. To share a bowl with those who find their own stash jar low, or to cover the pizza when your partner-in-chronic has had a long week, and just need a night of great ganja and good people. Whatever you do this month, be sure to pay it forward stoner Aquarius. Now is your time to shine, but you never know when you will be the one who will need that kindness repaid.
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope February
2022/01/28
Stoner Aquarius, have you ever been smoking your preroll, inhaling the sweet vapors of the sacred sinsemilla, only to start coughing because you realized you smoked it down so much that you had started burning into the paper crutch?  January was much like this: it started off smooth, fulfilling and enjoyable. But you may have burned too hot, too quickly and by the end of the month you found yourself out of energy with an empty stash jar. Stoner Aquarius, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, as you were highly successful in lifting the spirits of those around you. You shared your bright aura and good ganja with all of your fellow tokin’ terrestrials. You spread good vibes and shared high times with those in your orbit who really needed help rising above rough times.  You don’t need to change your attitude or your optimism my water-pipe bearer, just try to slow your roll a little as you move through February. Right now, you will need to swing your focus from serving others to self-care. Spend whatever time you need to rest and recharge your own cosmic spacesuit stoner Aquarius.  Because health and healing are the goal, Indica dominant strains should be your go-to ganja selection during this season. Of course, you can seek out the consciousness-expanding Sativas when it is spiritual healing you want to focus on, but overall relaxation and recreation should be your highest priority. Don’t worry though stoner Aquarius, low-key doesn’t mean you have to be lazy or that the month will be lame. You can still join your cannabis companions to share a joint or two, or enjoy late night bong rips with your best buds. Just don’t neglect your solo smoke sessions.  You have an exciting and fulfilling year ahead where you will play the role of ganja guru, guiding your partners-in-chronic on countless endo-adventures. So, my stoner Aquarius, toke it easy now so your fire doesn’t burn out before you reach your final destination.
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope January
2021/12/30
Stoner Aquarius January will be a month of personal revelations.  As the new year begins, the universe will be sending positive waves of personal growth. What a wonderful way to start the year my curious WaterBearer.  Open your stash jar.  Inhale the consciousness expanding gifts of the sacred herb.  Open yourself to the positivity flowing into your being. The cannabis strain does not matter this month stoner Aquarius.  Toke time throughout the month to sink deep within when you spark a bowl to get lifted. Your curiosity for outward puzzles will turn inward this month.  Don't fight the feeling to find secluded moments for solo smoke sessions.  Use your cannabis copilot to guide your inquiry within.  There is still so much to learn about yourself stoner Aquarius. This medicated meditative practice of self inquiry will be as illuminating as the Sun bringing warm rays on a cold day.  With self discovery, the terrestrial plane, and the broader smoke circle, will be unveiled with new sight.  That should make solving terrestrial puzzles so much easier! Warning Stoner Aquarius:  The positive cosmic vibes will illuminate your aura this month.  It will seem as if your fellow terrestrial astronauts see you in a new light.  Like a magnet with positive attraction, be ready for people to gravitate toward you.  But you must find your inner chill stoner Aquarius.  Frivolous escapades will take you off your progressive mission this month.   Find new discoveries within, and allow your inner voice to sing.
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope December
2021/11/29
Stoner Aquarius, like many of your four-twenty friendly peers, you may look back on the past eleven months wondering, ‘what just happened?!’ How is it that a year can seem so long, and also like it was January just three months ago? With the final days of 2021 upon us, you may be torn between making the most of it by going out in a blaze of glory, or by smoking endless bowls from the comfort of your couch. Stoner Aquarius, the best answer is a bit of both. You don’t want to commit yourself to couchlock too early in the month, and miss out on the final endo-excursions of 2021. There will always be those partners-in-chronic with endless energy who are ready anytime to journey to a remote recreational smoke spot. You don’t have to join every adventure. You can let your cannabis companions make the plans and when you want, simply pack some snacks, bring some green, and join them for the ride. Remember, my indecisive Water-Pipe Bearer, you can reserve the right to pass on the grass if you’re not feeling particularly social that day. Because you can’t always predict what the day will bring, or how energetic you will be feeling, you should stick consistently to hybrid strains this season. If you stray too far into Sativa dominant territory, you may over exert yourself with ambition, only to need more time spent on recovery. Go too deep into the Indica heavy strains, and you may deplete your motivation.  Missing out on the fun, and finding yourself later saying: ‘I should have just gone!’ Stoner Aquarius, with new strains being created and hyped seemingly every other week, it can be hard to know which to pick. Now is not the time to play herbal roulette and end up smoking something that throws off your delicate groove. I say, stay with the sticky classic hybrids like Chemdog, OG Kush, or the tried and true, frosty White Widow. Since you can’t be quite sure of what vibe the next moment will bring, you want to avoid the intensity of radical highs and lows.  This month, seek balance and just stick to the middle path. Tweet
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope November
2021/10/31
Stoner Aquarius, when given the choice between smoking the roaches, or a fresh bowl, who wouldn’t choose to go with the good green?  Make sure you apply the same logic when deciding your schedule as you head into the final stretch of 2021. You want to be able to start the New Year working on new endeavors, not wasting time hurrying to finish yesterday’s to-do list. Throughout the month, pay close attention to your cosmic spacesuit stoner Aquarius. In order to make sure the future you is energized and ready to grind, you have to make sure you are taking care of what your mind and body needs in the present. The best prescription for finishing up the year on a high note, is to make sure your herbal medicine cabinet includes a variety of strains:  Indica, Sativa and Hybrids. The sacred herb is as diverse in it’s forms as the effects it can induce. There is a strain for every occasion, but remember that not every strain will be right for every occasion. My diligent Water-Bearer, when it is time to get things done, select the uplifting and inspiring Sativa cannabis species. Stick to classics like Super Silver Haze when you know that you have a full and fast paced day ahead. Sour Diesel is good for those moments when you want to let your mind get lost in the clouds of imagination, but don’t necessarily want to become too hazy, in case your daydreaming gets interrupted with pertinent business. Stoner Aquarius when it’s time to relax and recharge your cosmic spacesuit, Indica is the best way to go. Fall back and fire up anything Kush:  Whether it’s the ancient Afghan Kush or that true original, OG Kush.  If you want something classic, yet modern, there’s always the LA Confidential cannabis strain. Be forewarned stoner Aquarius:  Only toke-up the most relaxing version of the sacred herb when you have plenty of time on your hands. Otherwise you may find yourself having to clear your calendar when you find yourself more chill than you expected. But, if you find that this month requires a more middle-of-the-road approach, you should definitely have plenty of cannabis hybrids on hand. Even when we plan out every moment, our cosmic adventure can be filled with roadblocks and detours, pleasing highs and unwanted lows. Those well balanced buds, that can be both healing and heady, are always a safe choice when you’re not sure what may lie ahead. Tweet
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope October
2021/09/30
It’s October stoner Aquarius!  The first full month of Fall.  The days are growing shorter while the trees are shedding their leaves in anticipation of the frosty winter blanket they will soon be wearing. As you look around you will notice most others in your orbit are stocking up their stash jars, pulling out their warmer wardrobe, and generally preparing to be holed up in their smokey sanctuaries until the Sun returns. But not you stoner Aquarius. You might switch out your rope sandals for cozy mukluks, trade your bathing suit for the warmth of your comfy hoodie, and make sure that your own stash is both frosty and FULL; but you have no plans of letting a little cold or cloudy weather slow your roll this month! While your more complacent cannabis cohorts may be content spending hours on the couch binging shows, you will be busy making moves and manifesting the change you want to see. Heady Halloween Glass Giveaway Remember this on your stellar journey:  Sometimes it is the changes you can’t see which will be the most significant. You play the role of the mindful marijuana mediator, and cannabis confidant to the smoke circle. You are there for the canna-fam.  Whether they just need someone to share a bowl with, or a sounding board of empathy, your well-balanced wisdom is appreciated. But, this month stoner Aquarius, before you start in on your selfless service of others, you have to ask yourself a most quintessential question:  What do YOU need? This season, it is your turn under the magnifying glass. Not only in a critical light, but with a contemplative gaze, and constructive intent. You are always ready with sage advice for others, but identifying and working through your own emotions can feel like a foreign concept. This month you must toke time for self.  Maybe you are contemplating a substantial switch up; like changing your occupation or career path. It could be as simple as diversifying your smoking credentials by switching from Indica to Sativa strains. Or, something somewhere in between; like telling your cannabis companion that you just need a little more space. Toke time for solo smoke sessions to calm and clear your mind.  Just you, the sacred herb, and your favorite pipe. My well-meaning Water Bearer, by no means should you skip out on social smoke circles, or actively avoid helping your cannabis companions grow and rise above.  Just make sure you are putting in the care required to make your own garden flourish and thrive. Tweet
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope September
2021/08/30
Stoner Aquarius, you are familiar with, and likely partake in, some form of annual Spring cleaning.  How about the concept of Fall foundation building?  Are you ready?  It might sound like it’s still a long way away, but just like objects in the mirror, 2022 is much closer than it appears! After the past few months spent on the grind: Working, playing and toking in equal measure.  You may be tempted to light up, kick back, and slow your roll as you move through September. While you have certainly earned a few celebratory bowls for all you accomplished during the simmering Summer season.  But at the risk of harshing your high, my dear stoner Aquarius, I must forewarn that there is still much to be done. Even if you are feeling satisfied with the spiritual and financial progress you have recently achieved, now is the time to plant the seeds for the prosperity you want to manifest in the future. In the early days of the month, it will be important to take a physical and mental inventory of everything from the levels of your stash, to your bank account balances, to recent accomplishments, and even current goals. Instead of planting yourself on the couch, resigned to hiding from the oncoming cold in the safety of your smokey oasis, find what inspires you stoner Aquarius. Find what ignites your inner spark, and motivates you to keep it growin’ and groovin’. Just be sure to not take yourself too seriously my judicious Water-Bearer. You will definitely see a great harvest from all the effort and energy you invest into your worthwhile endeavors. Use the sacred herb as a counterbalance to your daily terrestrial discipline.  Toke time to relax with a freshly packed bowl, or a topshelf pre-roll, to recharge your cosmic spacesuit.  These marijuana moments are all that is needed to maintain your upward trajectory. It will take effort and focus to strike a balance between imagining infinite possibilities for the future, and transferring the diligent work into fully realized results. Big dreams and high aspirations are a great start, but they don’t amount to much if you never take action to make them happen. Just remember stoner Aquarius, you are in the captain’s chair:  YOU are the only one who is in control of your cosmic spacesuit.  YOU decide how far or how high you fly. No one else can force you to aim higher.  No one else can hold you down. So, if you decide to take a break from reaching for the stars, that is okay. Just know that when you shoot for the moon, even if you don’t make it, the view will be all the more spectacular from greater heights. Tweet
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope August
2021/07/30
Stoner Aquarius, you have spent the first months of Summer doing what you do best:  Helping all of your closest cannabis companions to weather the cosmic storms, and maintaining cooler heads in the face of increased tension and turmoil. You don’t have to completely abandon your friends when they’re in need, but during the remaining Summer days of August, you should focus more on manifesting and maintaining your own peace. The days of dropping what you’re working on to help your partners-in-chronic work through their issues are over. Light one up stoner Aquarius, and let go of the guilty feelings that you have to be the one who fixes everything. Once you have freed yourself from the self-inflicted sense of obligation to others, you will be able to lean wholeheartedly into your own passion projects. Remember my burdened Water-Bearer, self-care isn’t selfish. There might be a brief adjustment period as you make your own well-being a higher priority, but with a little cannabis propelled perseverance you will find your ganja-guided-groove soon enough. Without having to keep watch over all of your fellow tokin’ terrestrial astronauts, you will be able to turn your sights to the wider, wondrous world around you. Get up and get out there stoner Aquarius. Maybe you take an extra day off to escape to the beach for a roast on the coast.  Or, perhaps you’d prefer to keep it as local as the couch in your living room, and enjoy a marijuana and munchies fueled stoner movie marathon. It really doesn’t matter what you choose to do, as long as you toke a little time for yourself. Don’t worry stoner Aquarius, not all of your smoke sessions have to be solo. All the energy and optimism you invest into your own well being is sure to attract the gaze of that special type of cannabis companion. Perhaps it’s your undeniably vibrant, groovy vibes emanating into the cosmos?  Or maybe it’s the sweet scent of those sticky buds you’re tokin’ on that will attract those hazy eyes your way? Stoner Aquarius, whether you are single or already have a partner, this month, you are certain to be packing more than just one bowl. Tweet
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope July
2021/06/30
Stoner Aquarius throughout the month you are sure to be a cool oasis for your fellow tokin terrestrial astronauts journeying throughout the hot, hazy days of July. Being in your presence will be as refreshing as the first sip of water after hours spent melting in the sun; as invigorating as the first puff after an extended tolerance break. You can expect the other stoner star signs to seek out your rejuvenating waters. Others might be looking for refuge from the blazing sun, but you are ready to soak up some rays, and light up those jays!  It doesn’t matter if your destination is a far-off secluded smoke spot by the sea, or a familiar trail close to home; any moment enjoying some good trees in the great outdoors will be time well spent. The only thing greater than your need to be out in nature, will be your desire for social interaction. Smokin Js Online Headshop Now Accepts Bitcoin and Ethereum You will need to stock up your stash jars early in the month stoner Aquarius. If you show up to a partner-in-chronic’s smoke circle, you want to be ready to match bowls. And if you’re the host of the hotbox, you want to make sure you have enough cannabis to ensure everyone reaches the next level. Nothing will end the smoke session early like running out of the sticky sensimilla before maximum liftoff is achieved. There is one word of caution this month stoner Aquarius:  Don’t let your eagerness to be the friend with weed result in you being the friend in need. You are always ready to help your cannabis companions.  Whether it be a listening ear when the daily grind is wearing them down, or to celebrate the big milestones during times of flourishing growth. But, this also means that you are often prone to putting your own needs behind those of others. Amidst all of your endo-excursions and being the cool-headed cannabis confidant to your fellow stoner star signs, don’t forget to toke time to relax and rejuvenate your own spirit. Stoner Aquarius could find themselves reaching for the peace pipe with the canna-crew before the month is over. Balancing the Water-Bearer positivity with their cannabis cohorts, and spending enough time on self-care, may unintentionally cause others to feel neglected. Let the sacred herb be the catalyst for communication.  Remember stoner Aquarius, those who are willing to pass the pipe to one another will always be able to rise above, and let any hard feelings pass them by. Tweet

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