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“The biggest differentiator between people who do well in a pressure moment versus people who do below their capability is perception of the situation. You have to befriend it.” - Dr. Hendrie Weisinger   Dr. Hendrie Weisinger is a world-renowned psychologist and author of the recent New York Times Bestseller, Performing Under Pressure. He has spent three decades helping individuals and organizations enhance their performance through his innovative applications based in clinical, counseling, social, organizational and evolutionary psychology. He’s a popular blogger for Psychology Today, Huffington Post, Execunet.com and Lifehack.org.   In this episode, Dr. Weisinger and I talk about the pressure athletes feel during and leading up to the games and how it impacts their mental health. Dr. Weisinger discusses the pressure from parents of athletes and how it differs from supportive parenting, drawing from practical applications from his book. He also provides advice and suggestions for parents who want to switch things up and for athletes who want to instill confidence in themselves.    Resources: Performing Under Pressure: The Science of Doing Your Best When It Matters Most by Dr. Hendrie Weisinger and J. P. Pawliw-Fry The Unlikely Art of Parental Pressure: A Positive Approach to Pushing Your Child to Be Their Best Self by Christopher A. Thurber and Hendrie Weisinger Dr. Hendrie Weisinger’s other books

“They need someone outside of their sport to talk to about it. I never want my kids to feel like if they had a bad practice that I’m also going to be mad that they had a bad practice. How can we be that support? We should be their biggest advocate, but that does not mean that we’re marching onto the fields demanding more playing time or more personal attention. That’s a different kind of thing. We need to be making sure that holistically they’re doing ok as a human being. That’s the most important job that we have.” - Shari Medini   Shari Medini is the co-author of Parenting While Working from Home: A Monthly Guide to Help Parents Balance Their Careers, Connect with Their Kids, and Establish Their Inner Strength and the co-owner of AdoreThemParenting.com. Her parenting articles have been published in dozens of print and online publications. Shari’s past experience includes working with children and families in the mental health field, mentoring and speaking as a mindset coach and working as a freelance writer and marketing strategist for companies across the country.   In this episode, Shari and I talk about raising young athletes. Shari is a former collegiate gymnast and is a mind coach. She discusses the role her parents and her experiences as an athlete play into how she’s raising her young athletes. She also shares about her book and what kind of feedback she has received from readers. Listen to her advice for parents of young athletes and what they need to do in July to prepare for youth sports season in the upcoming year.   Resources: Adore Them Parenting Co-author of Parenting While Working from Home: A Monthly Guide to Help Parents Balance Their Careers, Connect with Their Kids, and Establish Their Inner Strength by Karissa Tunis and Shari Medini

“As parents, you guys are probably the best monitors of your children’s behavior because you’ve been watching them from the time they were born, and honestly, you’re a better expert on your child than I am so I tend to trust parents on that.” - Dr. Rolando Gonzalez Dr. Rolando Gonzalez is a sports psychiatrist who provides mental health care for children through young adulthood with the Lee Physician Group and Golisano Children's Hospital in Fort Myers, Florida. He previously worked at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and the University of Miami, where he completed his fellowship training in child and adolescent psychiatry. He provides mental health care and treatment for elite and competitive athletes through all competitive levels, including athletes with disabilities. He provides initial consultation with a focus on specialized care that compasses diagnostic clarification, medication management, and individual therapy. He serves on both the Youth and Outreach Committees of the International Society for Sports Psychiatry. In this episode, Rolando and I talk about the difference between sports psychology and sports psychiatry and some of the common disorders he sees among the athletes he works with. We also discuss what parents need to know about traumatic brain injuries and his position on performance enhancing drugs. Join us as he also explains why it’s important for parents to help their child cope with the changes and maintain structure and a routine during the COVID-19 pandemic. Resources: International Society of Sport Psychology (ISSP)’s ​International Journal of Sport & Exercise Psychology Sports Psychiatry: Strategies for Life Balance and Peak Performance by David R. McDuff

“We’ve asked the kids - do you like it better here now that your parents are outside? And, unfortunately, a lot of them say ‘yes.’” -- Anthony Telford  Anthony Telford spent 9 seasons as a MLB pitcher, but now he’s a father and a coach who works closely with both up-and-coming athletes and their parents.  So how does Anthony perceive the parent-athlete relationship? What are the pandemic restrictions teaching him about his athlete’s relationships with their parents?  Why does he have a Parent Penalty Box at his training facility?  In this episode, Anthony details his journey to and through the MLB as well as his current role as a coach of both young athletes and their parents. This discussion is challenging, convicting, and well worth a listen, so take some notes and be sure to share your perspective with me on Instagram at @sportpsychworks or leave comments at https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact.  About Former MLB Pitcher Anthony Telford  Anthony Telford, a retired MLB pitcher who played for the Baltimore Orioles, the Montreal Expos, and the Texas Rangers over the course of his career in professional baseball. In college he played for San José State University. Today, Anthony has a renown training facility - The Zone - in Tampa Bay, Florida - where he coaches players of all ages and levels. 

“You’re a lot more than the sport you play. You’re a human being too, and sometimes that gets lost.” - Nick Buonocore  For a lot of families, their traditional view of sports has changed. What was once a tool for exercise, discipline, and fun is now perceived as a vehicle to college scholarships. The mindsets of athletes, and sports parents, have shifted as a result.  With us today is Nick Buonocore, a former professional athlete and the founder of Reformed Sports Parent, a collective of former coaches and athletes with the mission of providing “information, expertise, and first-hand insight to support responsible decision-making and thoughtful planning for the well-rounded personal development of young athletes.” Join us as we discuss Nick’s athletic history, parenting, and what it means to be a reformed sports parent.  What’s Your Take?  Let us know what you took from today’s episode by contacting Kathy at @sportpsychworks or leave comments at https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact. 

“I would get nervous for the kids. I wanted them to succeed so much because that’s what I wanted. I hated losing when I was in high school. I didn’t want the kids to feel that. I wanted them to win.” --Scott Eyre  35% on any academic test is a failure. In baseball, batting 300 (or having a 3/10 success rate at the plate) is excellent - even in the MLB.   Former major league baseball pitcher Scott Eyre knows this all too well. The left-handed pitcher played for the Chicago White Sox, Toronto Blue Jays, San Francisco Giants, Chicago Cubs, and Philadelphia Phillies. Eyre played from 1997 - 2009, ending his career on game 6 of the World Series. Eyre won a World Series Championship the year prior with the Phillies, appearing in game 2 with no runs and no hits.  Now, Eyre is a husband with two sons attending Purdue University in the fall. Scott has been a baseball coach since 2011 and is currently continuing his coaching career.   In this episode, Scott and I talk through… His journey to professional baseball  Watching his children play sports after living the professional athlete dream  Being competitive and growing up in an athletically-competent family  Coaching baseball after playing in the Major Leagues  How excellence in baseball is still “failure”   This episode will curb your curiosity about life as a professional athlete while offering powerful insights on parenting and coaching after your own sports career is complete.  Questions? Comments? Let’s talk!   Want to dive deeper into today’s episode? Connect with us on Instagram at @sportpsychworks or leave comments at https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact. 

“When someone tells you who they are or someone tells you what they want, believe them.” -- Jill Wheeler It’s a new year, a new decade, and a new special series for Parenting Peak Performers. We couldn’t be more thrilled about this episode with adventure therapist, speaker, writer, athlete, and yoga instructor, Jill Wheeler. As the founder and director of the Wellfit Institute, Jill combines life coaching and the power of nature to produce impactful adult therapy. Jill is a licensed mental health and licensed professional counselor, who creates transformational and empowering experiences for individuals, groups, and communities in personal and business sectors.  When the new year comes around, we tell ourselves we’ll try new things. Conquering a new task is thrilling, and a great way to build confidence. As parents, we want our kids to feel that success, and when we spot talent in them, we’re quick to take them to tryouts.  But what happens when your teen tells you they don’t want to go?  Today, Jill and I discuss  Expedition mentality  How to make an agreement with your teen about trying something new  The benefits of self-enrollment and empowering your teen to choose  How forced entry into sports can break relationships, motivation, and trust  And so much more!  Keep up with Jill at jillwheeler.com and learn more about Wellfit Girls here.  Let's Talk About It! I love your questions, comments, and reviews. If something in this episode got you thinking, let’s talk about it! Send your questions and comments to @sportpsychworks or  https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact. 

“I realized that people needed more than just fitness to reach their health and wellness goals.” --Chris Edwards  How can we be healthy? Really? It’s a question humans have been asking for most of history - and yet, it always seems like there are new quick fixes or conflicting research. During his studies in professional training, Chris Edwards realized that fitness - while vital - isn’t enough to take people to their peak level of health.  So what is? And how can we help our kids get there? Chris believes health and wellness is a family matter, and he gives three tips for success in family health.  1.Everyone has to be on board.  2.Gain an education (don’t worry - Chris will give legitimate resources) 3.Focus on nutrition first.  Information is power, and Chris drops a lot of it in this episode.  About Chris and TriCore Wellness  Chris Edwards is a Fitness and Wellness Professional with over 14 years of experience specializing in personal fitness and wellness management. He holds multiple certifications and achievements in the fitness and wellness industry, is an accomplished competitive powerlifter, and is the owner and founder of TriCore Wellness. TriCore Wellness is a wellness management company that specializes in Personalized Health Coaching. TriCore captures and analyzes information about your Fitness, Nutrition, and Recovery to develop plans, coaching, and analysis for you to achieve any health and wellness goals. Keep the Conversation Going  The episode is over, but the conversation doesn’t have to be. Send me your thoughts or questions about this episode at @sportpsychworks or https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact. 

How can we keep our kids safe while they play the sports they love?  Today marks the end of Parenting Peak Performer’s 4th season, and as we wrap up, we’re going to pivot away from talking about the coach’s perspective. Instead, we’re closing our season with another vital topic for parents of athletically-involved kids.  Safety.  No incredible athletic achievement is worth it if our kids’ health is at stake.  To help me process how parents can keep their kids safe on the court and field, I’ve brought in Dr. Greg Rubin. Dr. Rubin is a board-certified internal medicine physician with added qualifications in sport medicine. He established and staffs a walk-in clinic in Naples Florida. He’s the co-founder of The Sports Med Review, a website focused on providing open-access information to sports medicine physicians.    In this episode, you’re going to hear Dr. Rubin discuss perhaps the most frequent injury in sports medicine: concussions.  Today, We’re Answering Key Questions about Concussions  What is a concussion? And what is “second impact syndrome?”  How can you identify them?  How should a concussion be treated?  What can parents do to prevent them?  What can we do to speed up recovery?    There’s so much we can do to prevent and treat concussions for young athletes, which is why this episode is absolutely essential for any parent with sports-active children.  Want to join the conversation? Let me know what you like in this episode or what you’re curious about by sending your questions and comments to @sportpsychworks or  https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact.  

“When I was a high school basketball coach, I wrote down on a napkin one day that a child with confidence will try anything. Whether they succeed or not, they will try. An insecure child will always contract to a place of comfort, a place of security, a place of complacency.”    -Micheal Burt    When it comes to understanding what makes peak performers tick, there’s no one better than Coach Micheal Burt. Burt, a former championship women’s basketball coach, is used to coaching go-getters, so it’s no surprise to learn that his track record is filled with outstanding accomplishments.  The 13x best-selling author of titles like “Person of Interest,” “Million Dollar Follow Up,” and “Inside the Mind of a Monster” also holds the world record for the most speaking engagements in one day: 41. If you’re scratching your head at how anyone can fit 41 talks in a 24 hour period, you’re not alone. Burt has a long list of near-impossible accomplishments that give him compelling stories and keen insights for driving success.  Burt has mastered the art of instilling contagious confidence in those he communicates with. He knows how to “inner engineer” people to win at the highest levels. With deep methodology in coaching the whole person, Burt retired at age 31 to create the coaching program Monster Producer which has quickly grown to over 700 participants around the world. Today Michael talks with us about confidence - what it is, how to build it, and how to get it back when it’s been lost. This conversation speaks to me so deeply because it’s applicable not only to those peak performers were trying to raise, but also to ourselves.  If something in this podcast ignited your confidence, tell me about it. Share what stood out to you through https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact. You can also keep up with Coach Burt on his website at  http://www.coachburt.com or find him on facebook as MICHEALBURT. 

What key traits make a person successful inside and outside of athletics? And how can athletes find an identity outside of their sport? My conversation with LSU assistant swim coach Steve Mellor addresses these questions, as well as the important relationship between an athlete and coach. In addition, we discuss how parents can encourage their students to speak up, in a respectful manner, in the pressure-filled collegiate sports environment. I’m thrilled to have Steve Mellor on the show today because he has deep experience as both a high-level competitor and coach. Mellor began his illustrious swimming career in his home country, England, where he competed at an international level before making his way to the States to swim for North Carolina State in 2005. During his time as a collegiate swimmer, Mellor racked in an astonishing list of achievements. Set two NC State swim records — one for the 200-back and another for the 400 IM Received All - ACC honors from 2007 to 2009 Qualified for the NCAA three times, with a top - 18 finish in the 200-back in 2008 Achieved a world-ranked status in 2005 and 2008, being named in the top 50 for the 200- meter backstroke Competed as a finalist in 2008’s US Open Mellor has now served as LSU’s Assistant Swim Coach for 5 years, where he’s helped guide a number of student-athletes to SEC and NCAA Championships. You’re going to love Mellor’s unique, dual insights as both an athlete and a coach, and if you want more of what you heard today, go check out Steve’s podcast Career Competitor. It offers personal interviews that help reveal shared traits among competitors in high-level sports, and how those traits can be applied to careers outside of athletic competition. Have a question or comment about today’s episode, or have a topic you’d love for me to cover on an upcoming show? Reach out to me on social media at @sportpsychworks or through https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact. We’ll see you again next week!

“There are boundaries, there are expectations, and there’s a balance between play and work.” -Melissa Jackson For nationally and internationally acclaimed dressage competitor, horse trainer, and my guest today Melissa Jackson, the quote applies to both building a relationship with a horse partner and parenting kids. On today’s podcast, I talk with Jackson about a variety of topics including: The crossover between training horses and coaching kids What her career as a professional athlete taught her kids about flexibility, understanding, and sacrifice Processing her younger daughter’s decision to end her basketball career after high school Learning how to play a parenting role rather than a coaching role, and communicating with her daughters after basketball games The biggest challenge for sports parents today (it starts with a B) I’ve been honored to know Melissa Jackson, my guest today, for more than 20 years, both as my own daughter’s dressage coach and as a friend. What is dressage? It’s an artistic and competitive style of horseback riding that requires intense skill and dedication to master. Jackson has undoubtedly achieved that mastery. Jackson is a USDF Bronze, Silver and Gold Medalist and a graduate of the L Judges program. Her great success in both National and International competitions earned her and her partner at the time, Wellington, invitations to the Festival of Champions in 2006 and 2007. This partnership went on to Germany to successfully compete and train under Hubertus Schmidt, at the Grand Prix Level. Melissa secured the ride on Whirlpool, aka “Hooli” in August 2013. She now competes with her new partner, Domani. In their first year at the FEI level Melissa and Domani qualified and competed in the Markel/USDF Developing Prix St. George championships, finishing 4th overall in the country. I’ve learned so much from Jackson over the years, and I know you’re going to walk away from today’s episode with a great perspective to pull you through the week. If something strikes you during our conversation, I’d love to hear from you! Connect with me on social media @sportpsychworks or through https://www.kafcounselingandsportperformance.com/contact. Melissa Jackson Bio Melissa Jackson a USDF Bronze, Silver and Gold Medalist and a graduate from the L Judges program, has had great success at the National and International levels. She has earned several regional titles and horse of the year awards. She owns and operates Windfall Farms, a small dressage training facility, located in Parrish, Fl. Melissa has trained with many top dressage athletes and trainers such as Hubertus Schmidt and Johann Hinnemann. She is most known for the success she achieved with her past dressage partner, Wellington. Highlighting their career with an invitation to the Festival of Champions in 2006 and 2007. This partnership went on to Germany to successfully compete and train under Hubertus Schmidt, at the Grand Prix Level. Melissa secured the ride on Whirlpool, aka “Hooli” in August 2013. With many career highlights together including USDF Region 3 Intermediate Champion and Prix St. George reserve Champion. They competed in the 2014 Festival of Champions, finishing 11th. And finish their career together by competing back to back years in the 2015 Festival of Champions. With the support of her husband, John, and daughters, Jessica and Faith, Melissa is able to pursue her lifelong dream of one day representing the United States. They have recently purchased a new partner, Domani. In their first year at the FEI level Melissa and Domani qualified and competed in the Markel/USDF Developing Prix St. George championships, finishing 4th overall in the country. She feels thankful and blessed to have an amazing family, happy, healthy horses, and such supportive clients and friends.