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This week I'm answering a question from Doby, a mom of four boys, as a follow-up to our recent episode on tattling. She wants to know how to handle tattling when her kids are different ages: should consequences be the same or tailored to each child, and should both kids be held responsible when only one tattles? I walk through both approaches, including how to scale a consequence by age and how to use each child's "currency" so it actually lands. Doby also tells me about her 7-year-old, who is sensitive, rigid, and anxious and who constantly finds fault with his easygoing 4-year-old brother, tattles, and provokes him into breaking rules. We talk about what birth order may be adding to the picture: an oldest child who has been "dethroned" three times, the pressure that falls on oldest kids, and the natural rivalry between same-sex siblings close in age. Then I give her a practical plan for helping him feel more secure, including why encouragement works better than praise and the exact kinds of "you" statements to use that build a stronger sense of self. Episode Reference: Richardson, R. W., & Richardson, L. A. (2000). Birth order & you: Discover how your sex and position in the family affects your personality, career, relationships, and parenting. Self-Counsel Press. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I share an experience from a recent flight that reminded me how easy it is for parents to focus on a child's behavior while missing what the child is actually trying to communicate. I watched a young child become increasingly upset as his attempts to communicate were repeatedly ignored until his behavior escalated. It was a powerful reminder that whining, crying, and tantrums are often not the real problem—they can be the result of a child feeling unheard, misunderstood, or powerless. I talk about how simple child-centered parenting skills like acknowledging what a child is saying, reflecting their feelings, setting a calm limit, and offering an appropriate choice can completely change these interactions. We can't always give our children what they want, but we can make sure they know their thoughts, feelings, and experiences matter. Sometimes the moments when we are most frustrated with our children are exactly the moments when they most need us to come down to their level and meet them where they are. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose six-year-old can be cooperative one minute and completely defiant the next. I explain why behavior like refusing to get in the car, undoing something positive after being praised, or digging in when asked to do something is often less about "bad behavior" and more about a child's need for power and control. When we understand what is driving the behavior, we can respond differently instead of getting pulled into the power struggle. I also share how intentional choice giving can help children feel more empowered throughout the day, even when the actual expectation is not negotiable. I walk through what that can look like in a real-life situation like getting into the car, why staying calm and neutral matters, and why encouragement is more helpful than praise when we want children to develop confidence, responsibility, and internal motivation. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose 3- and 5-year-old children are constantly tattling on each other over every little thing. I explain why telling young children to "work it out" usually doesn't work—they simply don't have the developmental capacity yet to reason through sibling conflict on their own. Instead, I share how parents can use clear, consistent choices to help children begin developing self-control and responsibility without turning Mom or Dad into the household referee. I also talk about the importance of keeping consequences immediate and age-appropriate, especially with very young children, and why the parent's tone matters just as much as the limit itself. The goal is not to punish children for tattling, but to help them learn that their choices have outcomes and that they can begin taking more responsibility for how they handle minor sibling conflicts. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose 7- and 9-year-old daughters are experiencing significant anxiety around going to school. We talk about the difference between choosing homeschooling because it genuinely fits a child better versus using homeschooling to avoid an anxiety-producing situation, and why that distinction matters. I also explain how anxiety can show up physically through things like stomachaches or behaviorally through crying, clinging, and refusing to enter school, and how those patterns can grow over time if the underlying fear isn't addressed. I also talk about the importance of involving anxious children in major decisions that affect them. Kids with anxiety tend to do better with predictability, clear expectations, and some sense of control, so whether a family chooses traditional school, homeschooling, or a hybrid option, communication and buy-in matter. The goal is not simply to eliminate discomfort, but to make a thoughtful decision about what environment will help the child thrive while also addressing the anxiety itself. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a follow-up question from a mom who recently reduced screen time for her 8- and 10-year-old children and is now seeing an unexpected result: her son wants to spend much more time outside with friends. That is a huge win, but it has created a new parenting challenge—how much freedom and independence should a 10-year-old actually have? I talk through ways to gradually increase independence without ignoring legitimate safety concerns, including starting with one approved activity, setting clear expectations, and allowing children to earn greater freedom by demonstrating responsibility. I also discuss why there is no single age when every child is suddenly ready to roam independently. The neighborhood, the friends involved, the child's maturity, the ability to communicate with you, and your own comfort level all matter. The goal is not to eliminate every possible risk or give children unlimited freedom, but to find a balance where they can practice independence while knowing that increased freedom comes with increased responsibility. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose seven-year-old has become frustrated with her play therapist and says the therapist treats her "like a baby." I explain why seven is still right in the sweet spot for child-centered play therapy, and why complaints about therapy are often less about the therapist or the approach and more about the child's resistance to doing difficult emotional work. Children don't always have the words to explain what they are feeling, so we have to listen beyond the complaint and consider what it may actually be communicating. I also talk about why resistance can look very different from one child to another—avoiding eye contact, refusing to enter the playroom, calling therapy boring, or saying the therapist is annoying—and why that doesn't necessarily mean therapy is a bad fit. Sometimes resistance is simply a sign that something important is being stirred up. Rather than rushing to change approaches, I encourage parents to trust the process, give their child time, and remember that meaningful therapeutic work often requires courage before a child is ready to fully engage. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a collection of parent questions around one central concern: what do we do when a child seems to be struggling with who they are? I talk about signs that can point to a shaky sense of identity, including anxiety, negative self-talk, constantly changing how they present socially, and difficulty believing in their own competence. I introduce the concept of the "looking glass self" and explain how children gradually form beliefs about themselves based on what is reflected back to them by the people around them. I also explain why both criticism and excessive praise can interfere with healthy self-concept development, and why encouragement is so powerful. When parents consistently communicate messages like "I trust you," "I believe in you," and "you can figure this out," children begin to internalize those beliefs for themselves. What we reflect back to our children matters, and over time, those reflections help shape who they believe they are becoming. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom who realizes that screens have gradually become a major part of her children's daily lives and now wants to make a change. I talk about what to expect when you begin reducing screen time, why children may push back so strongly, and how to use child-centered parenting skills like reflecting feelings, setting limits, giving choices, and encouragement to help them through the transition. I also explain how to talk with children about screen limits in a way they can understand. Rather than arguing about whether screens are "good" or "bad," I encourage parents to return to a simple message: it is our job to keep our children safe. Changing long-established screen habits may not be easy, but once we know more, we can make different choices—and we can confidently hold boundaries that protect our children's developing brains. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose 9-year-old daughter experiences intense anxiety every morning before school—even though she does well once she gets there and usually comes home saying she had a good day. I explain why this pattern often points to anticipatory anxiety: the fear of what might happen becomes far more overwhelming than what actually happens. Over time, children can even begin to fear the physical feelings of anxiety themselves, creating a cycle of stomach aches, tears, worry, and resistance every morning. I also share what parents can do to help break that cycle. Rather than focusing solely on getting the morning behavior to stop, I explain why we need to address the anxiety underneath it by staying calm ourselves, reflecting our child's feelings, and building their confidence in their own ability to handle difficult things. Combined with child-centered play therapy, these simple shifts can help children develop the emotional vocabulary, self-esteem, and regulation they need so anxiety no longer controls their daily lives. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a homeschooling mom whose six-year-old becomes angry, disruptive, and resistant whenever it's time to do schoolwork. I explain why his behavior may be less about academics and more about vulnerability, power and control, and figuring out where he fits within the family. We also talk about how sibling roles, birth order, and the comparison that naturally happens between older and younger children can affect a child's developing sense of identity. I also share why homeschooling can create a unique challenge when a parent is both mom and teacher, and why the same approach that worked with older siblings may not work for a younger child. Rather than forcing every child into the same learning environment, I encourage parents to become students of their children—paying attention to how they learn, what they need, and where some creativity, individual attention, choices, and clear boundaries may help everyone succeed. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose toddler struggles every time it's time to transition to the other parent's home for a custody exchange. We talk about why these transitions are so difficult for young children, how toddlers experience time differently than adults, and why resisting the handoff doesn't necessarily mean they don't love or enjoy being with the other parent. I explain how validating your child's feelings, giving them as much age-appropriate control as possible, and providing clear, predictable expectations can make these transitions feel safer and less overwhelming. I also share practical ways to use child-centered parenting during custody exchanges without trying to distract, persuade, or "fix" your child's emotions. Whether you're navigating a court-ordered custody schedule or simply trying to make transitions between homes less stressful, this episode will help you better understand what your child is experiencing and how to support them with confidence and compassion. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom whose son has struggled with aggression, sadness, and emotional regulation for years. She wonders why he's so different from his peers and why therapy hasn't uncovered the "reason" behind his behavior. I explain why behavior is always communication, how aggression and withdrawal are often signs of emotional pain rather than defiance, and why our goal isn't to uncover every cause of a child's struggles, but to provide the relationship and environment where healing can naturally take place. I also discuss the connection between self-esteem, identity, and healthy peer relationships, and why children who don't yet know who they are often have difficulty connecting with others. You'll learn how encouragement, choice giving, and unconditional acceptance at home work alongside play therapy to help children become more regulated, more confident, and ultimately a healthier version of themselves over time. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from an adoptive mom who is learning how to use child-centered parenting techniques with her daughter, who struggles with aggression, big emotions, and sensory challenges. We talk about why children often can't think clearly when they're emotionally overwhelmed, how to use empowerment choices before conflict begins, and how to create meaningful enforcement choices that teach responsibility without relying on punishment. If you've ever wondered how to put child-centered parenting into practice in everyday life, this episode is full of practical examples you can start using right away. I also answer questions about setting limits when children hit, kick, or lash out, supporting a spouse who is learning these parenting skills at a different pace, and adapting child-centered parenting for children with developmental delays. Whether you're new to this parenting approach or trying to become more consistent, this episode will help you understand how small changes in your responses can strengthen your relationship with your child and encourage healthier emotional growth over time. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I answer a question from a mom who feels like she's constantly butting heads with her ten-year-old daughter. We talk about why the preteen years often bring a strong desire for independence, how to balance growing autonomy with healthy boundaries, and why behaviors like arguing, disrespect, and constantly saying, "You're not the boss of me," are often signs of a child trying to figure out who they are rather than simply being defiant. I also share practical ways to strengthen your relationship during this important stage of development, including how encouragement builds confidence, why some reward systems can unintentionally discourage struggling children, and one simple weekly habit that can transform your connection with your child. If you're parenting a strong-willed preteen and wondering how to navigate the growing push for independence without constant conflict, this episode will give you both perspective and practical tools. Ask Me Questions: Call (813) 812-5525, or email: [email protected] My New Book! Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Want to go deeper into the concepts discussed in this series? Check out Parent Companion for Play Therapy, created to help parents better understand their child, the play therapy process, and how lasting emotional growth takes place. https://www.amazon.com/Parent-Companion-Play-Therapy-Understanding/dp/B0H2D98F18/ My First Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/ Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.