Advertise on podcast: Seeing Other People

What if the way we experience dating and relationships has less to do with the other person and more to do with the state we’re in when we experience them? Dr. Sue Morter joins Seeing Other People to talk about how our internal state, nervous system, and relationship with ourselves can shape the way we communicate, make decisions, respond to triggers, and connect with other people. We talk about what happens when we’re operating from fear, anxiety, or the need to be chosen, and how becoming more grounded in ourselves can change the way we show up in relationships. Dr. Sue walks us through practical grounding techniques, including deep belly breathing, posture, and Mula Bandha, and explains how practicing these tools can help us get out of our heads and become more present in our bodies. We also talk about breaking patterns, changing the way we respond to difficult relationship dynamics, knowing when to stay or leave, and why the question might not be “How do I find the right person?” but “How do I become the right person for me?” Dr. Sue Morter Instagram YouTube All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order.  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on Cohosts for Life, we're getting into a conversation we've been having more and more as we get closer to becoming parents: will we be sharing our baby on social media? We're talking about where we stand, the boundaries we're considering, and why it's such a complicated decision. Plus, we're catching up on pregnancy life, nesting, and the little things that make marriage entertaining. Then we're answering your listener questions, including an update from the girl who went on a date with her ex's friend, and a tough situation about what to do when you and your partner want the same future but can't seem to get on the same timeline. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order.  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Ready to clean out your closet and make some extra cash? Download the Vinted app for free, start selling clothes you no longer wear, and keep everything you earn! 3 Million Butts Love TUSHY! Get 10% off your first bidet order with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE at https://hellotushy.com/SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Have you ever been so focused on whether someone likes you that you forgot to ask yourself if you even like them? In this solo episode, I’m breaking down how easy it is to confuse validation, attention, and the excitement of being chosen with actually liking someone. We’ll talk about why dating can start to feel like an audition, how to shift your focus from “Do they like me?” to “Do I like them?”, and the questions to ask yourself after a date to figure out how you really feel. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order.  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Cohosts for Life is officially moving to Tuesdays! This week, we're catching up on life lately, pregnancy struggles, nursery prep, and Ilana's trip to North Carolina before diving into your listener questions. We're talking about how to keep the excitement alive in a relationship once you've settled into a routine, sharing our favorite ways to plan dates and date card days, and giving advice to a listener who's had a series of missed connections with a woman who just popped up on Hinge. Plus, a wedding etiquette update from a listener and a very real look at what happens when we try to decide what to eat for dinner. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order.  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE 3 Million Butts Love TUSHY! Get 10% off your first bidet order with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE at https://hellotushy.com/SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Are you constantly thinking you should be married by now, should be over your ex, should know how you feel after a few dates, or should be further along in your life Dr. Lucette Beall joins me to break down what all of this “shoulding” actually does to our brains and how it can impact the choices we make in dating and relationships. We talk about societal timelines, learning to separate what you actually want from what you think you’re supposed to want, trusting yourself when dating, and how to stop measuring your life against everyone else’s. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Who keeps track of everything that needs to get done in your relationship? Ilana sits down with InvisiBILL – Anxiety Receipts founder Lisa Virginia Anderson to talk about mental load, invisible labor, and what happens when one person becomes the project manager of the relationship. They discuss why “just tell me what you need” isn't always as helpful as it sounds, how resentment builds when one person feels responsible for everything, and the signs to look for while dating that someone will actually be an equal partner. www.getinvisibill.com  All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ilana and Jake are coming to you from a rainy weekend in the Hamptons with lots to catch up on: Ilana officially understands football, someone finally offered her a subway seat at six and a half months pregnant, she took her glucose test, and they toured their first daycare. Then, they get into your listener questions about how to stop internalizing rejection as proof that you weren’t “enough,” whether you can really stay close friends with someone who rejected you, wedding etiquette when your ideal date is close to a family member’s wedding, and what to do when you’ve spent three years in a situationship, know he’s not your person, but still can’t bring yourself to let him go. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order.  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Rejection can make you question everything about yourself. Was I too much? Not enough? Did I do something wrong? And why did they choose someone else instead of me? In this solo episode, I’m talking about why someone not choosing you doesn’t mean you weren’t good enough, how to stop looking to everyone else for answers, and what rejection actually does and doesn’t say about you. Plus, I’m answering your questions about compatibility, self-trust, comparison, and learning when to take feedback to heart versus when to let it go. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Stefanos Sifandos, relationship coach, speaker, and author of Tuned In and Turned On, joins Seeing Other People to talk about what happens after you find the right person. We dive into why a relationship isn’t the finish line, how healthy relationships can bring unresolved patterns to the surface, and how to tell the difference between something you need to work through and something your partner needs to change. We also talk about knowing yourself before dating, finding alignment in values instead of relying on a checklist, and why sometimes the best thing you can do for your dating life is pause dating altogether. Stefanos shares how to navigate conflict, communicate your needs, move through a fear of being alone, and stay connected through major life transitions. Plus, he shares the relationship advice that has stuck with him most: don’t contort yourself to impress someone else. Find Stefanos at tunedinandturnedonbook.com, stefanossifandos.com and @stefanossifandos All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week, we’re talking daycare waitlists, baby registry decisions, why Ilana is becoming a baby product expert, and the realities of figuring out taxes when you’re self-employed. Then we answer your questions: Is the second date too soon to say you’re serious about having kids? How do you stop finding love from becoming the one thing you can’t stop thinking about? And should you write someone off for sending a low-effort like on a dating app? Plus, our advice for making your dating profile actually give people something to respond to.  All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

An anonymous guest joins the podcast to talk about navigating a long-term relationship in a big city — from taking their first trip together just two months into dating, to moving in together before getting engaged, to ultimately buying a home together. We talk about the pressure of the “relationship escalator,” making major decisions on your own timeline, navigating family members who don’t understand your choices, and how communication, trust, and knowing when something feels right can matter more than doing things in the “right” order. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jane Garnett, former Hollywood producer turned psychotherapist and author of This Time With Feeling, joins the podcast to talk about how to get unstuck — from old emotional patterns, the stories we tell ourselves, and the idea that our lives are supposed to look a certain way. We talk about why understanding our patterns doesn’t always stop us from repeating them, how disappointment can become a gateway to the next chapter, and why getting back in touch with our bodies, intuition, and curiosity can help us move forward. Plus, Jane shares how to rewrite the stories we’ve created about ourselves, stop waiting for life to begin, become the protagonist of our own stories, and why sometimes we need to explore rather than nix when it comes to relationships. Get Jane’s memoir, This Time With Feeling: This Time With Feeling Website: janegarnett.com Instagram: @thebananajane See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ilana and Jake catch up on baby prep, their first stroller arrival, Ilana’s newfound obsession with baby clothes, Jake’s thoughts on being married to a content creator, and why apparently having a twin bed until age 26 builds character. Then, they get into your listener questions. If they were single today, how would they actually go about finding their person? They talk dating apps, singles events, meeting people organically, getting set up by friends, and why going out with the sole mission of meeting someone might actually make dating harder. Plus, they weigh in on a messy Hinge situation: is your ex’s friend fair game? Shop Joolz strollers at www.joolz.com and check out our Joolz Aer² lightweight stroller! All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Missing someone after a breakup can make you question everything. Did you make a mistake? Does still loving them mean you should try again? And if nobody else compares, does that mean they were actually your person? In this solo episode, I’m talking about why missing someone doesn’t mean you should be together, how nostalgia can make us forget why things ended, and how to tell the difference between genuinely wanting someone back and simply missing what you had. Plus, I’m answering your questions about exes, second chances, and moving on when you still care. Mentioned in this episode: Juice Glasses with Lid & Glasses without lid All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Erica Shea is back on Seeing Other People, and this time she’s married. After years of dating, heartbreak, situationships, and wondering if she was ever going to find her person, Erica is now on the other side of the story—and realizing that finding your person is only the beginning. We talk about what it feels like to finally have the life you spent so much time hoping for, why she wishes she could tell her younger self that she wasn’t as behind as she felt, and how all those moments that felt like setbacks eventually led somewhere she never could have planned. We also get into getting fired and finding the happiest place she’s ever been in her career, moving to Denver, trusting the next chapter even when it’s scary, and what marriage actually looks like once the wedding is over. Erica opens up about navigating two families, holidays, the pressure around having kids, and the ways our brains—and social media—can convince us that everything is going wrong. Plus, we revisit the dating advice that helped her find her husband: sometimes you really should go on one more date.  Follow Erica Shea: @ericasheaaa on Instagram All links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more) Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE  Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.