Advertise on podcast: Beta Male Revolution

TRIGGER WARNING: THIS EPISODE CONTAINS A DISCUSSION OF SENSITIVE TOPICS PERTAINING TO DEATH AND TRAUMA Have you suppressed your pain and trauma in the past? How does unresolved trauma manifest in reality? Why should you commit to yourself to heal the pain? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak about healing trauma with Madehania Baheta. Meet Madehania Baheta Madehania is a Refugee turned Marine turned Doctoral Candidate. His family escaped war in 1979, and he then lived in a refugee camp, before coming to the USA in 1982. Subsequently, he joined the Marine Corps, where he served for 22 years. Currently, Madehania is pursuing his Doctoral degree. He is also a program manager at Pelaton where he has supervised, supported, and trained over 400 logisticians Connect with Madehania on LinkedIn.   In This Podcast Summary * Healing trauma after the event * Why you should consider working through your trauma * Look to your “why” for inspiration Healing trauma after the event After traumatic events, the stress and anxiety endured settle in the body, and unless we work through those events and “release” the trauma from our bodies, it will remain there. [My mother] had trauma and … she’d go to church, she’d just pray on it, that’s all she could do and that’s all she knew … [the trauma] still manifested somehow through yelling or breaking down. (Madehania Baheta) Studies have shown that people with “stuck” trauma and unresolved emotions are more likely to develop illnesses related to compromised immune systems. Therefore, resolving trauma and healing is both a mental and physical health necessity. Why you should consider working through your trauma Many people just want to move on after experiencing something difficult and have it be done. In the marine corps you don’t have time to deal with your feelings and no one goes and gets help because in the marine corps you’re supposed to just beat your chest and not look weak, but a lot of marines deal with PTSD and personal issues but they don’t get help because of the stigma around it. (Madehania Baheta) Sometimes people avoid talking about their trauma due to cultural clashes or for fear of judgment. However, sometimes people are afraid to resolve their trauma with the help of another person because they do not want to be abandoned, or to open themselves up only to be let down or told to suppress it. That is why you should seek professional help. I’m happy I did [get help] because it definitely helped me process a lot of stuff, grieve for my friend, and try to be a better husband and father at the same time. (Madehania Baheta) Look to your “why” for inspiration Why would you seek help? Who or what is important to you that you want to protect and become better for? Why should you try to be the best version of yourself? When you are struggling in life, look for your why. Look for the people who care about you or who you care about, look at your dreams and goals, and the things you want to experience in your life. Useful links: * Connect with Madehania on LinkedIn. * Moving On After Loss & Becoming a Sudden Caregiver with Karen Warner Schueler * Discover more at The Beta Male Revolution Website Meet Billy Eldridge Meet Billy, the resident beta male. For Billy, this is a place to hang out with other beta males and the people who love them. We’re redefining what beta males look like in the world....

Are you someone’s primary caregiver? How do you move forward in life after suffering a big loss? What are the important protocols to set up to help you sustain yourself while caring for someone else? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak with Karen Warner Schueler about becoming a sudden caregiver and moving on after loss. Meet Karen Warner Schueler On the day Karen became a sudden caregiver, she was a wife, a mom, a consultant and business owner, a coach, a runner, a friend, and a consumer of too much Starbucks coffee. She was not a caregiver. Until she was. On that day when her late husband was diagnosed — out of the blue — with stage IV cancer, Karen certainly had no idea that she had instantaneously joined a silent army of informal, unpaid family caregivers around the world who had also been pressed into sudden service. Karen’s book, The Sudden Caregiver, is a practical and proven guide, a roadmap, and a source of comfort for anyone who is caring for a loved one. Visit The Sudden Caregiver website as well as Tangible Group. Connect with Karen on LinkedIn. FREEBIE: Access these Free Caregiver Resources and redeem a free e-book or paperback book by reaching out to [email protected] In This Podcast Summary * The structure of Karen’s book * Moving forward in life after a loss * Protocols of becoming a sudden caregiver The structure of Karen’s book The Sudden Caregiver was written in three parts: 1 – Pathways to wellbeing: Building a level of resilience to deal with the crisis of having to treat an illness and care for the person going through it. 2 – The roadmap: dealing with the sudden stress with the acronym CARE: C – crisis A – as normal as possible R – resolution, hopefully positive E – evolve back into your life 3 – Evolution: what are the kinds of things you can do to integrate the lessons that you have learned? Because caregiving impacts and changes you profoundly. Moving forward in life after a loss The number one thing is to accept that there is a caregiving paradox. The paradox is that [in] everything you read when you research caregiving and what you can do … a lot of things [say that things] are going to be incredibly negative for the caregiver. But at the same time, that wasn’t my whole experience. (Karen Warner Schueler) The caregiver’s paradox is that the caregiver is constantly in crisis, but the crises will not always feel the same, because you learn to cope with each problem that arises. The caring is both a source of distress and burnout as well as a source of well-being if you can reframe it for yourself – with a lot of positive psychology. There will be moments of softness and love amidst the stress and frustration. Protocols of becoming a sudden caregiver * Expect the best but prepare for the worst * Find your group of core friends or loved ones who will support you We tend as caregivers to not reach out to other people … about half of all caregivers just go it alone and don’t ask for help. (Karen Warner Schueler) * Be honest with yourself about what you need help with and delegate tasks out to loved ones who will help you to do them * Do not let people into your inner core group who are going to take time, energy, or resources away from you. Useful links: * BOOK | Karen Warner Schueler – a href="https://www.amazon.

How do you maintain your faith and hope in the church when you have been hurt by it in the past? Is there a difference between following the teachings of Jesus and feeling obliged by the church community? Are you willing to fully love yourself and those around you? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak about the other side of the church with Lathan Craft. Meet Lathan Craft Lathan Craft is the author of the Amazon best-seller The Leper in the Church, host of The Other Side Of The Church Podcast, and founder of Heartbeat from Hope, a non-profit organization giving individualized hope to the most hopeless of places. Lathan is also the owner of Made for Purpose, a coaching and consulting company founded to help clients find their dream job. Lathan has a heart for motivational speaking, ministry, and reaching others through transparent and hope-filled discussion. Visit The Other Side Of The Church and connect them on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn.   In This Podcast Summary * Maintaining hope in the church * Can you follow Jesus and not the church? * If you see or sense an issue in the church, report it Maintaining hope in the church How do you keep hope? You read the gospels. I think Jesus is literally the complete antonym of the American church in so many different ways, and if we really are preaching from our church to follow Jesus, I really hope people follow Jesus, and not just the construct we make church out to be. (Lathan Craft) The church as an organization and the teachings of Jesus are not synonymous. You can follow Jesus and be faithful to God without being affiliated with a church or church as a construct. Sometimes people try to convince you that to withdraw from the church community is to turn your back on Jesus, but that is not true. Jesus is a part of you and your journey and is not something that the church should weaponize to keep you within the community. If we keep saying, “follow Jesus”, I really hope Jesus changes our hearts and says, “okay, if you want to follow me then follow me … don’t follow what you think I am … the American flag or organized religion, follow me” … if we really want hope, we follow in his footsteps and we see how he loved people and what he did. (Lathan Craft) Can you follow Jesus and not the church? To follow Jesus means to champion and support those whom society says are not good enough, and to love those that the church might even say are not good enough. Jesus loved people and their stories and welcomed them into His space. You can follow Jesus by embodying his teachings in your life instead of keeping to what the church says you should or should not do. This idea and this reality of loving those who everyone else, in our culture, in Texas, in America, says, “they don’t fit what our church is or what our society is, therefore, we have nothing to do with them”, actually Jesus has everything to do with them. (Lathan Craft) Jesus teaches people to love one another for who they are and not for who they want them to be. If you see or sense an issue in the church, report it

How do you move on from a mistake? How can you negotiate a big change in yourself that separates you from the community you are part of? Are you raising your children with openness or with fear? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak with Joshua Harris about negotiating changes in yourself while moving forward holistically. Meet Joshua Harris Joshua Harris brings his scars to work. A former author, his books have sold more than 2 million copies in dozens of languages — books he later discontinued when he realized the damage they were causing. He has led a staff of 50 people in a megachurch and experienced the relational pain caused by organizational dysfunction — and he has ultimately distanced himself from Christianity. Now, Joshua is publicly deconstructing long-held religious beliefs through the power of living an authentic story. His personal mission is to support people whose voices have been stifled and to help them share their message with the world. Visit Joshua Harris’ website and connect with him on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Youtube. In This Podcast Summary * The journey of reconciling * Negotiating a change in community * Raising your children with openness The journey of reconciling I will continue to encounter people who, for the first time, are finding out about the ways that my thinking has changed, or I’m interacting with people who are unpacking parts of their lives that were negatively affected by my book and purity culture. (Joshua Harris) Making amends after creating a big impact is a journey for everyone involved, from the person who sparked the event to the people that it impacted. While Joshua is moving on with his life and committing to good work, he is still available to people who were impacted in the past by the book. As they are processing that grief and dealing with that pain, and maybe ticked off at me for the part that I played in that, I want to be a part of encouraging healing in them. (Joshua Harris) Rather than feel like Joshua has to perpetually be apologetic, he is working alongside people who were affected by his old book and helping them to heal. We can’t live in regret forever and we can’t live in the past forever, but I’m also trying to recognize that part of having published a book and let it be in existence for so long is that I have to try to be a part of the cleanup of some of that fallout. (Joshua Harris) Negotiating a change in community When things happen in life that disrupts your environment, finding equilibrium can take some time, especially within your community if it is close-knit or perhaps insular. [People] change in some way and then they’re constantly aware of this pressure [or] disapproval … from that community, and that’s a unique challenge. (Joshua Harris) Negotiate this shift by remaining your fully authentic and loving self. Committing to who you are may exile you from the community, but committing to the community may exile you from yourself if that community is not aligned with your authenticity. Who comprises the community that you want to be a part of? Can you create it if you are struggling to find it? Raising your children with openness There is no “right” or “wrong” way. No one can guarantee you a way that you should raise your children for success and openness.

Have you experienced a “life apocalypse” event? What are the steps to overcoming and making the most of a life apocalypse event? How has the pandemic encouraged a massive shift in people’s approaches to life? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak with Jim Kukral about life defining apocalypses. Meet Jim Kukral For 25-years Jim Kukral has been writing books (10), keynote speaking (150+), and building successful lifestyle businesses as a marketing entrepreneur. But the pandemic and a near-death diagnosis of colon cancer changed everything for him in 2020, so he threw away all his past success to start something completely different, a new brand called Life Apocalypse. As an almost fifty-year-old successful businessman, husband, and father of two, Jim realized that he needed to spend his remaining days on this planet helping people figure out how to live a life of significance, impact, and purpose. Jim created Life Apocalypse to help people like him who are thinking about legacy, death, lifestyle, and life purpose. Visit Jim Kukral’s website and connect with him on Instagram, Twitter, Youtube, and LinkedIn. FREEBIE: Take Jim’s Free Text Based Life Apocalypse Challenge In This Podcast Summary * 22 minutes to a life apocalypse * What is a life apocalypse? * Life is changing * The steps to overcoming a life apocalypse event 22 minutes to a Life Apocalypse When Jim was diagnosed with cancer in 2020 and scheduled for operation, he was left alone in a hallway before his operation started for 22 minutes. I was in my thoughts for 22 minutes. I [didn’t] think about the money or things like that. I thought, “what did I leave for my family in terms of legacy?” Meaning, what are my kids going to remember me by? (Jim Kukral) That period of reflection, in the face of not knowing if he would survive, brought incredible insight into his life. During those 22 minutes, Jim reconnected with the things that he realized were actually the most important in life, for him, and probably for other people as well. Those 22 minutes were really the most important in my life because they allowed me to look and really think about what meant the most to me. (Kim Kukral) Most people will experience this moment in life, where – due to life-threatening circumstances or unforeseen challenges – they realize what is truly important to them in this world. That is a life apocalypse event. What is a Life Apocalypse? Apocalypse is not only about zombies. It is also about a revolution and revelations. These are what I call life apocalyptic events. A life apocalypse is a transitional moment in your life that’s usually not self-imposed that greatly directs how your life will move forward. (Jim Kukral) Everyone will experience a life apocalypse at some point in their lives. These can be positive moments such as the birth of your children, as well as negative moments, such as being diagnosed with cancer. After traumatic experiences, people can experience post-traumatic stress disorder, PTSD. What they can also experience is post-traumatic growth, PTG. When you change your mindset and think about how you can grow from a trauma, you can learn to change your life for the better a...

Where do emotions come from? What happens in the brain during high stress and anxiety? Why is feeling your negative emotions the key to reducing their intensity and frequency? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak about emotional resolution with Cedric Bertelli. Meet Cedric Bertelli Cedric Bertelli is the Founder and Director of the Emotional Health Institute. He began his studies around the understanding of emotional functioning in 2009 in France and has continued his work in the United States since 2011. In collaboration with several other professionals, he developed the Emotional Resolution™ method (or EmRes™), which is designed to permanently release disruptive emotional patterns within minutes. In addition to working with clients individually, Cedric trains mental health professionals and educators across the United States on Emotional Resolution. Visit the Emotional Health Institute and connect with them on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Youtube. Visit Cedric Bertelli’s website and connect with him on Instagram. In This Podcast Summary * What are emotions? * What happens in the brain during high stress? * Why must you feel your emotions? What are emotions? Emotional difficulty and emotions in general … are obsolete predictions from the brain. An emotion that keeps on coming back is a prediction from the brain. (Cedric Bertelli) In life, people have experiences, and the brain uses those experiences to update its predictions about the future. That is what learning is. In this sense, an emotional difficulty is a prediction from the brain that has not yet been updated. The brain is having the same emotional response to different situations. How does one update a “stuck” prediction? We know today that at the origin of every single one of our disruptive emotional patterns [such as] depression, anxiety, anger, stress … is a [similar] event. It is always a moment of very high stress, like trauma. (Cedric Bertelli) Some things that are traumatic for babies and children are not traumatic for adults, but trauma experienced as a child can follow someone’s development into adulthood if it is not resolved. What happens in the brain during high stress? When the body cannot handle the amount of stress in a moment, there is a short period of disassociation. In other words, a cognitive shutdown. What you and I are aware of consciously [and] cognitively would represent about 2000 bits of data and information per second. [This] is what the cognitive [brain] can manage … the subconscious brain can gather about four hundred billion bits of information per second. (Cedric Bertelli) The conscious mind, so as not to overload us, filters information down into a much smaller portion so that we can function without being overwhelmed. Therefore, when we experience trauma and the prefrontal cortex shuts down for half a second or more, we experience that heightened sense of experiencing life because the prefrontal cortex is not active to filter out s...

Is a niche necessary? How does taking a step back help to reinvigorate creativity and help you to see the broader picture more clearly? Where can people have genuine, open discussions without judgment? Billy and Brandy Eldridge are back from taking a break from the podcast. Today they chat about what’s happened during their break, their thoughts and feelings about doing the podcast in the way they want to, and what you can expect from the Beta Male Revolution Podcast! In This Podcast Summary * Taking a step back to breathe * To niche or not to niche? * Loving people where they are at Taking a step back to breathe Life can get busy. So busy, that you begin to stuff things away with the hope of coming back to it later but you never do, so all the systems, garages, and relationships get clogged up with life. I think that’s what happened when we took a break. We [then] had time to breathe a little bit and could see things that we had ignored with our kids, ignored with ourselves … they didn’t need to be band-aided, they needed to be worked through. (Brandy Eldridge) Taking a step back from the podcast allowed Billy and Brandy to reexamine their life, clean out the metaphorical – and physical – garage, and get on track with what was important to them. Remember that even though life can be, and will be, difficult, you have an abundance of blessings. You do not need to berate yourself for your problems. You can deal with them while you are grateful for the blessings you have. To niche or not to niche? What we’re going to do is just to do this podcast the way we want to … we’re going to talk about things we want to talk about, and hopefully [they’re] things you want to listen to. (Billy Eldridge) Billy and Brandy wanted to create great content, but they pressured themselves to make great content before they really knew what they wanted to make. The direction now is to make the content that they want to and then embolden it with greatness. Loving people where they are at The Beta Male Revolution Podcast is a space where topics are spoken about without judgment. Billy and Brandy welcome discussions around marriage, relationships, life, and faith deconstruction. I want to love people where they are and not where I think they should be … I want to get rid of that timeline and belief system that people have to change to move towards me and my belief systems. (Billy Eldridge) Are you ready to find the freedom to be yourself as a beta male? Do you want permission and tools to be your best beta? Are you ready to join the revolution to find strength as a beta? If you want to be comfortable in your skin and be the most authentic beta male, then our free beta revolution course is for you. Sign up for free. Useful links: * Check out the Man Enough Podcast * Discover more at The Beta Male Revolution Website * Sign up here for the free Beta Male Course Meet Billy Eldridge Meet Billy, the resident beta male. For Billy, this is a place to hang out with other beta males and the people who love them. We’re redefining what beta males look like in the world. I have learned to embrace my best beta self, and I can help you to do the same. As a therapist, I understand the need to belong. You belong here. Join the REVOLUTION.   Meet Brandy Eldridge Hello, Beta friends. I am an alpha personality who is embracing the beta way of life. I feel alive when connected with people,

Our goal with this podcast was to bring connection and to know that people are going through things, and share our experiences. We’ve had tons of disagreements, shared our story, and been vulnerable. But we are still learning and growing… So we are pivoting. After 51 episodes we have decided to pivot and we’re taking a short break. We’ll be back with a new podcast and we’d love to hear your thoughts. Give us some feedback, and let us know what you want us to talk about and dig into? Our focus is creating a community of like-minded people who are willing to trudge this road to a happy destiny and support one another through life, growth, and change. We look forward to our next chapter! Email us at [email protected] Useful links: * Analyzing the Human Condition Through Art with Michael Aaron Ulmer | Episode 51 * Olive Tree Counseling * Sign up here for the free Beta Male Course Meet Billy Eldridge Meet Billy, the resident beta male. For Billy, this is a place to hang out with other beta males and the people who love them. We’re redefining what beta males look like in the world. I have learned to embrace my best beta self, and I can help you to do the same. As a therapist, I understand the need to belong. You belong here. Join the REVOLUTION.   Meet Brandy Eldridge Hello, Beta friends. I am an alpha personality who is embracing the beta way of life. I feel alive when connected with people, whether that is listening to their stories or learning about their passions. Forget small talk, let’s go deep together. Come to the table and let’s have some life-changing conversations.   Thanks for listening! Did you enjoy this podcast? Feel free to leave a comment below or share this podcast on social media! You can also leave a review of the Beta Male Revolution Podcast on iTunes and subscribe! Podcast Transcription [BILLY ELDRIDGE] Beta Male Revolution is part of the Practice of the Practice podcast network, a family of podcasts seeking to change the world. To hear other podcasts like the Bomb Mom podcast, Imperfect Thriving or Empowered and Unapologetic, go to practiceofthepractice.com/network. Hey, Beta Male Revolution. It’s me Billy and I’m with a lovely and talented wife, Brandy Eldridge. Hey Brandy. [BRANDY ELDRIDGE] Hi Billy. [BILLY] Well, we’ve got some surprising news for you guys, and then we’ll get to our current mood and temperature in the room. [BRANDY] It’s fine. Everything is fine. [BILLY] Man, we started this podcast on a, was it a high note? [BRANDY] No. [BILLY] No, we were, not this one. The very first one. In the very beginning, we couldn’t agree on anything. [BRANDY] Well, in the very beginning, before we recorded the podcast, we agreed on a lot of stuff. [BILLY] Yes, but when we get this mic in front of us — [BRANDY] Do you want me to tell you what the problem is because I will? The problem is you don’t articulate your thoughts. You keep your thoughts in your head and you expect me to mind-read them and you don’t tell me complete thoughts. So I have no clue what you’re trying to say, what do you want to do, and then you throw it on me last minute. “This is what we’re doing.” But you never said this prior. Like just now you said, “Well, are you going to be able to do this,

Is art by nature therapeutic? How can the creative process help people engage with and articulate unspoken aspects of their inner world? Why is letting go one of the most important things a parent can do for their child? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak with Michael Ulmer about analyzing the human condition through art. Meet Michael Aaron Ulmer Michael Aaron Ulmer is a visual creator passionate about sharing stories that analyze the human condition by crafting thought-provoking stylized self-portraits. Michael uses his self-portraits as a therapeutic outlet to study and convey his journey and his battle for mental wellness. With each and every piece he creates visual reminders of his own problematic areas he needs to work on, as well as builds bridges for people to be able to self-reflect and understand themselves better. His short films & documentaries have won international awards and he has created commercial & documentary work with global brands such as WD-40, National Geographic, Green Giant, Cooper Tire, Bissell, Melitta, and more. Visit his website and connect on Instagram and Facebook. In This Podcast Summary * Concept of ‘comfort’ * Tap into your creative side to help you process * Advice for parents from a son Concept of ‘comfort’ The concept of comfort is a difficult one to navigate because as much as comfort is something that we enjoy, we protect it at all costs, and sometimes that means consciously turning away from those who suffer because we do not want them to “spoil” our comfort, or break the illusion of comfort. It’s one of those things where it hurts to look at because I know that was my frame of mind and so I had to sit there, sit in that emotion and be like ‘okay, this is how I feel. Okay, I need to work on this’. (Michael Aaron Ulmer) We can become so accustomed to our comfort that we do not want anything to interfere with it or for anything to remind us that outside of our comfort is other people’s discomfort. That is where empathy comes in – we sometimes need to step out of our comfort, or broaden it, to encompass more people. I think when we sit in our own circles and we don’t confront our own inconvenience or the things in the world that inconvenience us, I realize how fragile my ego is and how when I’m going about my day and taking care of my stuff and I see calamity in the world and I have to pause and look at it, sometimes I don’t lean into the pain, I want to look away … yet the world is calling out and saying ‘we’re hurting, things need to change’. (Billy Eldridge) We then need to examine our role in participating in other people’s disenfranchisement for our comfort, because if we are really true to ourselves, we find that true comfort cannot come at the cost of other people’s happiness or security. Tap into your creative side to help you process You can experience a therapeutic process in many different ways, from going to see a traditional therapist to exploring your creativity because when you tap into your creativity, you tap into your emotions, your feeling mind, and your explorative side. That’s one of the things that we recommend for people to tap into their more creative side and find ways to process that – all we are doing is helping people [to] articulate the untold parts of their soul, and what is that but art? Trying to articulate a thing that you do not have words for that you can’t quite say. (Billy Eldridge) Advice for parents from a son I meet with broken children all the time and its because parents try to use their children as a way t...

How can you move through insecurities to meet yourself, confident and clear? What can you do to create a workspace that encourages personal growth and honest, beneficial communication? Can you lean into the discomfort to better yourself? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak with Molly Tschang who is a powerhouse of kindness. Meet Molly Tschang Founder and CEO of Abella Consulting, Molly Tschang helps senior management to Win As One—which companies often never even try to do—guiding them to commit to each other’s success and build powerful chemistry to lead together. She is also creator and host of the Say It Skillfully® Radio Show and video series, and a member of Marshall Goldsmith’s 100 Coaches initiative. Molly serves on the boards of several privately-held companies and the Cornell Engineering College Council and is a CornellTech guest lecturer on teams and leadership. Molly has held executive leadership positions at Cisco Systems and U.S. Filter, where she led the integration of over 80 acquisitions globally and helped management navigate rapid change and uncertainty in high growth environments. An advocate of social enterprise, she also served as the executive director for NetHope and is a fellow of the RSA (royal society for the arts, manufactures and commerce) and board member of Community Solutions, a finalist for the 2021 $100 million MacArthur Foundation “100 & Change” award for accelerating the end of homelessness. Visit her website and Say It Skillfully. Connect on LinkedIn and Twitter. In This Podcast Summary * Being able to be your full self * Helping people through their insecurities * Throw ‘should’ out the window Being able to be your full self I find that to be so core, to be your full self is the way forward. If we had that in the world, even 5% more, we’d be in a crazy better place and so I really wish that for all the people I know: to be comfortable in your own skin, to love yourself first and to be able to have that confidence which then enables you to serve. It is very hard to serve if you are worried about yourself. (Molly Tschang) We all have insecurities at times and move through spaces in our lives where we feel better or worse, but there comes a point in our journey towards ourselves where we know – regardless of unpredictable life – that we are going to be okay. Helping people through their insecurities If you’re not leaning into some kinds of discomfort, discomfort is a sign of growth and we’re not trying to make it super painful but I do encourage that for folks and the curiosity, not the judging, the curiosity to say ‘hey, what’s out there, what could be better?’ (Molly Tschang) When something painful comes up, it is very easy to point the finger and place the blame of the discomfort on someone or something else. Molly offers that when you find yourself doing this, change the focus from them onto you and see what is going on for you in this situation. Be curious and don’t judge yourself because self-awareness is a key attribute among some of the world’s most successful people, and it is especially amplified when it is connected to self-compassion. It takes courage to go into that space of looking at yourself in these tough situations. Some people will set themselves free and other people will hold onto the tension. Please be your best friend and not your worst enemy … you can choose to traumatize yourself, totally your call, I would just ask [you] to ask yourself: ‘would you ...

Are you going back into the dating world, or you have been in the dating scene for a while? Which crucial skills and steps are men taught in order to help them succeed in the dating world? What is a piece of advice that women can take when it comes to dating men? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak with the LA Dating Coach, Tripp Kramer about how he helps men gain the confidence to succeed in the world of dating. Meet Tripp Kramer Tripp Kramer is an international dating coach for men. He created his “TED system” to help shy men confidently attract the women they desire. In his earlier years, he was a shy guy who figured out through trial and error how to get better and meeting, dating, and finding the right type of woman for you. He currently has a popular podcast on iTunes called “How To Talk To Girls” and has a book called Magnetic which teaches all his secrets on dating and attraction. Visit his website and sign up to work with him here. Connect on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, and Twitter. Listen to his podcast here. In This Podcast Summary * Building confidence * How to properly approach women * Who pays for the date? * Some common insecurities Building confidence I do believe that confidence – and the reason why anyone becomes confident – is because they become competent in something, so confidence comes from competence. In order to become confident with women, it’s like getting confident with anything else that we do … the more you go out and talk to them, converse with them [the easier it gets] …. And guys don’t do that because its very hard [initially]. (Trip Kramer) When you first start talking to women and getting used to the discomfort of doing something new that you are not used to, some men feel intimidated and judged by other men who are more comfortable than they are in that situation. Tripp coaches men to become used to rejection, and learn to overcome the fear of rejection, not in the way that they then become complacent, but that they do not let it stop them from continuing to speak to women and grow their confidence. When men become more confident in the things they do, they become more confident with themselves. How to properly approach women * Do not rely on something external: Avoid drinking and drugs to give you that momentary confidence boost, no matter how helpful it may be because it is not sustainable and can turn into a bad habit of needing to have a drink in your hand just to speak to a woman. * Tripp takes his clients through a system of desensitization, which is essentially practicing something over and over again until you are no longer afraid of it. Who pays for the date? In Tripp’s opinion, it is a question of decency, and who set up the date. If the man asks the woman out, he should pay. If a few dates down the line the woman asks the man out on a date, she should pay. There is also an element of attractiveness when someone is able to pay the bill, whether they are male or female because it shows success and a type of caring-dominance. In Tripp’s experience and opinion though, on the first date, the man should pay.

How does a pastor deconstruct their faith, are you on a path of deconstruction too? If God is what we think He is, is there, maybe, something that is beyond our idea of God? Is the God we believe in perhaps a reflection of who we are more than a separate entity to ourselves? In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak with David Hayward aka NakedPastor. Meet David Hayward aka the NakedPastor After 30 years in the church, he left the ministry to pursue his passion for art. NakedPastor uses words and images to challenge the status quo, deconstruct dogma, and offer hope for those who struggle and suffer under it. David is no stranger to belief systems – he holds a Masters in Theological Studies, as well as Diplomas in Religious Studies and Ministry, and University Teaching. His art expresses the stories and struggles of spiritual refugees and independent thinkers who question, doubt, or oppose the confines of religion. Each piece encourages difficult conversations and acts as a catalyst for critical thinking. He is an artist and writer who supports LGBTQ+ people and groups, BIPOC and women artists, creatives, journalists, and more, and encourages others to do the same. Visit his website. Connect on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, YouTube, and Twitter. In This Podcast Summary * Why the NakedPastor? * Be aware that abuse can happen anywhere, even in church * We pick our own Gods Why the NakedPastor? For David, the NakedPastor, the title was won in an auction that he was not even aware of being a part of, but it developed into a title that he uses in order to portray real, raw honesty for him behind the role of pastor. Not only to share the victories and the growth but to also share the struggles, doubts, and conflicts in his blog with his followers, sharing brutal and sincere honesty behind the role of being a pastor while being fully clothed. Be aware that abuse can happen anywhere, even in church I say the church is the perfect culture for abuse to occur and you have to work against it, pastors and leaders and churches have to work and they have to be diligent 100% of the time because the gravitational pull towards communities is towards the dehumanization of its members. (David Hayward aka NakedPastor) With spiritual abuse, there is no evidence of it, because it is all a strange feeling of questioning and doubting yourself, feeling the need to submit and putting your needs aside or it can be an unquestionable adoration of a leader: these are all examples of spiritual abuse in David’s experience. For Billy, his faith was only based on what he had been taught and told and nothing more. As an adult, the cognitive dissonance began to set in where he saw the inconsistencies but did not feel he had the space to question them, and so began his suffering. [It was like] if you open your mind up too much your brain might fall out, why did they have to keep us from things? Why did they have to control us? It was more about fear and coercion, it wasn’t about being consecrated into something beautiful and free, we were being shackled. (Billy Eldridge) We pick our own Gods We pick and choose to believe in the type of God that we feel worthy of following. Some people who are vengeful, hateful, and deeply dislike themselves may believe that God is punishing them or wants the...