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If you think you’re a burden for having needs or are worried people will leave if you have them, this episode is for you. I talk about why personal needs are inherently neutral for people who are securely attached. I explain how they view them, communicate them, and feel when they are met or sometimes not met. I explain why needs feel impossible if you have an insecure attachment style and how to inch closer to sharing them so you feel more supported and seen in your relationship. Tune in to start having a safe and secure relationship. Discover your attachment style to create a healthy relationship where you feel safe and supported. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching, I’d love to help drop the doubt that you’re not in the relationship and feel seen and heard by your partner. Get started by booking a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

If you don’t know how to have conflict without it escalating into a big fight, this episode is for you. I talk about my secret weapon to helping you have a productive fight that stays on topic, and that secret is regulating emotions. I know, emotions are scary. But when you learn how to regulate them it makes a world of difference to showing up for your partner and feeling like your fights are safe and getting resolved. Tune in to learn how to start fighting better and feeling safer in your relationship. Discover your attachment style to create a healthy relationship where you feel safe and supported. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching, I’d love to help drop the doubt that you’re not in the relationship and feel seen and heard by your partner. Get started by booking a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

In this episode, I talk about how to stop using control in romantic relationships. Two insecure attachment types have a high need for control and I break down why so you can understand where this pattern comes from. I also share what to do instead in order to get what you want from your partner.And I also share what to do if your partner can’t meet your need. It is possible to drop control and still get your needs met. Tune in to start using unconditional love in your relationship. Discover your attachment style to create a healthy relationship where you feel safe and supported. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching, I’d love to help drop the doubt that you’re not in the relationship and feel seen and heard by your partner. Get started by booking a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Are you curious about what a healthy relationship looks like? Do you have an inkling that something in your relationship is off? This episode peels back the curtain to show you what a healthy and secure relationship looks like. I talk about what arguments look and feel like, how it feels to come home to your person, and the deep belief that comes from knowing you’re with the right person. Tune in to learn more about what secure attachment looks like. Discover your attachment style to create a healthy relationship where you feel safe and supported. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching, I’d love to help drop the doubt that you’re not in the relationship and feel seen and heard by your partner. Get started by booking a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

If you’re not sure if your partner is the right person, this episode is for you. It’s going to help you understand how to make the decision to stay or leave. I share about common patterns that pop up when we make these types of decisions and how to move through them so you don’t get stuck in analysis paralysis. I finish the episode talking about how you figure out how to make a healthy relationship work or decision to walk away. It’s time to get rid of the confusion and indecision. And start finding or making safe relationships where you feel supported. Discover your attachment style to create a healthy relationship where you feel safe and supported. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching, I’d love to help drop the doubt that you’re not in the relationship and feel seen and heard by your partner. Get started by booking a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Do you want more reassurance from your partner? Do you feel like they’re always trying to take space away from you or you’re not sure if they want to be in a relationship with you? This episode will help you understand how to get what you need from your partner without having to be someone different. This is not about getting rid of your need for reassurance but instead knowing how to get them on board to meet your needs while you are also meeting their needs. Tune in to finally feel reassured in your relationship. Discover your attachment style to create a healthy relationship where you feel safe and supported. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching, I’d love to help drop the doubt that you’re not in the relationship and feel seen and heard by your partner. Get started by booking a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

In this episode of Lit AF Relationships, Sarah Cohan breaks down the real reason your partner might not be sharing and the surprising thing you might be doing that makes it harder for them to open up. Through personal stories from her own marriage and powerful client examples, Sarah explains how certain patterns like criticism, emotional reactions, and “weaponized curiosity” can unintentionally shut down the very vulnerability you’re craving. She also shares the mindset shift that transformed her own relationship after betrayal and helped couples she works with move from distance and doubt to deep connection where both partners feel seen and heard. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Do you feel like you can only rely on yourself or that it’s a sign of weakness to share your feelings? If so, this episode is for you. I share why the dismissive avoidant attachment style is brought up to think they need to be independent. I also share why the dismissive-avoidant is cut off from their emotions. If you’re in a relationship with a dismissive avoidant this will help you understand why they need so much space and why feelings are so hard for them. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Lit AF Relationships podcast is your resource for creating healthy relationships full of love, trust, safety, and respect. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Lit AF Relationships podcast is your resource for creating healthy relationships full of love, trust, safety, and respect. So many couples tell me they don’t want to fight as much as they and that their fights never feel resolved, but here’s the truth: fighting is a bid for connection, we’re just going about it in a tense and uncomfortable way. In this episode, I share a real live example of why fights escalate and how to stop them in their tracks. I talk about why we make conflict mean something about us, how anxious and avoidant attachment styles escalate differently, how to catch the difference between having a feeling and reacting to it, and why a short break, no more than ten minutes, can actually protect connection. If you’ve ever watched a small disagreement spiral into something much bigger, this episode will help you fight in a way that brings you closer instead of pulling you apart. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

On today’s episode, Mycah and Ian share how they both overcame their insecure anxious and avoidant attachment styles in order to create a happy and peaceful relationship. Mycah wanted to get engaged, married and start living together within a year. Ian was having doubts about commitment and had fears of making the wrong decision about marriage. She felt impatient about how their relationship was slowly progressing and frustrated that she hadn’t even met Ian’s momyet. When we first started to work together it was hard for them to share how they were feeling without it escalating to a fight. But eventually they learned the tools to validate each other’s emotions, to share vulnerably instead of reacting from their feelings, and to communicate their needs without expectations. These tools built a new level of safety for Ian to feel like the time was finally right to introduce Mycah to his mom. Tune in to hear how they did it and what it’s like to have secure attachment. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

I used to be that person. Raging jealousy. Constant suspicion. Side-eyeing my partner’s female friendships like it was my full-time job. Then I healed my attachment style… and everything changed. These days, jealousy barely shows up in my romantic relationship. But surprise, it still sneaks into friendships, work dynamics, and comparison spirals when I’m not paying attention. In this episode, we’re unpacking what jealousy is actually about. It’s distrust, old betrayal wounds, unmet needs, and the sneaky habit of outsourcing your worth through comparison. We’ll talk about: • Why jealousy is rooted in fear and childhood conditioning • The unmet needs hiding underneath jealousy (attention, loyalty, being chosen) • How comparison quietly steals your joy and self-trust • What happens when you stop measuring yourself against others • The kind of freedom and unconditional love that exists on the other side of jealousy If jealousy has ever made you feel ashamed, reactive, or “too much,” this episode will help you understand it without judging yourself. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Your partner is going to believe things about you that just… aren’t true. And the moment you start worrying about hurting their feelings or believe even a tiny piece of their story, you’re hooked. Guilt kicks in. You over-explain. You bend. You twist. You try to prove something that was never yours to carry. In this episode, I share how being told “we always do what you want” sent me into years of people-pleasing (spoiler: it didn’t change the story), why many of our relationship beliefs come straight from childhood, and how those beliefs shape what we’re able to see and receive in partnership. This episode is about separating fact from belief, untangling your emotions from your partner’s stories, and creating a relationship that’s actually sustainable long-term, not just emotionally reactive in the moment. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Today’s guest shares how she overcame her fearful avoidant attachment style to make big life changes and end a longterm situationship. Jane used to struggle with saying no so she found herself in a soul-sucking job, in a city she didn’t want to live, with an on-again-off-again partner that wasn’t making her happy. She couldn’t say no to her boss, her friends, or her say the ultimate no to her relationship. She shares how she overcame all of this and made big life changes to get her closer to the life she wants to live. If it’s time to end your relationship this one is for you. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Cheating sucks. It can cause alot of pain in your marriage and might feel impossible to overcome. If you’re going through it right now you’re probably stuck in a cycle of punishment and withdrawing or defensiveness. It is possible to overcome the real pain and hurt that you’re experiencing. And there is a specific process to help you speed up the healing. My hope is that this episode helps you understand how to move forward and gives you hope that when you overcome it you will have a better marriage than before the cheating. That was my own experience. Stop the suffering and start feeling better, tune in now. Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043 Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/ If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform