Advertise on podcast: Learning Curve with Mr. Chazz

The Six-Part Prevention Framework (Mr. Chazz’s Synthesis of the conversation) Consent culture and checking in, embedded from toddlerhood Safe adults: regulated, non-punitive, curious, able to repair Safe peer communities, fostered by connected parents and teachers Sexual health values: adults clarify what they want to model before conversations arrive Advocacy and reporting: teaching kids to speak up, with language and practice Identifying safe relationships and groups: the foundation for navigating fraternities, group chats, and beyond All six are interdependent; none works without the others Guest’s closing note: these lessons happen in small daily moments, not just formal book readings Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why Children Stay Silent Belonging need overrides safety rules Kids will violate known rules to preserve a friendship or peer connection Fear of losing the group is neurologically equivalent to exile Tattling vs. reporting distinction never taught Tattling: getting someone in trouble for non-safety issues Reporting: telling a trusted adult about something unsafe, to or from anyone Kids fear getting a friend in trouble, not just themselves Fear of consequences compounds silence Losing devices, games, or friendships if they disclose Punishment-based parenting makes disclosure feel risky 90% of abuse is by someone the child knows and trusts Child often wants the behavior to stop, not the person removed Fear of the unknown outcome keeps them quiet Consent Culture in Early Childhood Birdhouse (Chazz’s Brooklyn school) models consent from ages 2-5 Adults prompt: “Do you like that?” then shift to peer-to-peer checking in Mixed-age groups create natural power dynamic teaching moments Goal: children eventually check in without adult prompting Checking in changes the receiver’s experience too Being asked “do you like this?” opens kids to genuine self-reflection Same behavior lands differently when consent is sought vs. assumed Tickling example: don’t remove the experience, teach the check-in Sensory-seeking kids may want touch; the lesson is voice, not avoidance Intervention, Redirection, and Education Three-part framework when boundary crossing occurs: a. Intervention: name what’s not okay b. Redirection: offer an alternative way to play c. Education: explain why, without shaming either child Root cause matters: was it curiosity, desire for connection, or coercion? Coercive behavior (knowing it’s wrong and continuing) is a red flag requiring escalation Most peer sexual play is exploratory, not predatory Chazz’s preschool story illustrates the dynamic Friend used “I won’t be your best friend” as leverage, a learned threat pattern Adult intervention happened but education was incomplete Threat behavior in a 3-year-old reflects what she absorbed from her own environment Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I go through the 5 steps of Self Regulation with a specific parenting example Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this podcast episode I share about a $35 Brooklyn Parenting and Teaching Q&A event with Dr. Shefali. However, I can get you into the even for FREE, if you reach out to me with you name and email through instagram or email. This is the event link https://www.eventbrite.com/e/dr-shefali-with-lindsey-simcik-radha-agrawal-at-lapc-tickets-1998514748411?aff=oddtdtcreator&keep_tld=true I also discuss how to assess if you or someone else is improving their skill of assertiveness Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode I talk about the unique benefits we provide to our Teachers/Safekeepers and the process of continuing to improve benefits for Safekeepers in a Conscious Discipline way. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Mr. Chazz and Sydney reflect on how birdhouse was started. We reflect on some of the adult skills that were needed to even start birdhouse. The same skills we open this school to teach children, were the same skills we needed to just start the school. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is a reintroduction podcast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Child readiness for toilet learning Toilet Learning Philosophy & Readiness Adult readiness more critical than child readiness     •    Adults must have bandwidth to support child through incompetence-to-competence phase     •    Adult anxiety transfers to child, reducing learning capacity     •    Key question: Can adult maintain calm during transitional space? Child readiness indicators     •    Natural curiosity about potty (wanting to sit, try, emulate adults)     •    Curiosity wanes when effort feels challenging     •    Can child tolerate discomfort when effort > reward? Three learning stages     1    Effort much greater than reward (hardest phase)     2    Effort equals reward     3    Effort becomes easier, reward greater (integrated/automatic) Direct vs Indirect Learning Strategy Maximize indirect learning before potty expectations     •    Healthy adult modeling and body talk outside bathroom     •    Play props and toys around potty concepts (not in bathroom)     •    Books, songs, visuals about body processes     •    Reduces performance anxiety in actual bathroom moments Formal learning begins with underwear transition     •    Children learn by doing, not just observing (swimming pool analogy)     •    Must wear underwear before mastering skills (expect accidents initially)     •    Keeping diapers while expecting consistent potty requests is unrealistic     •    Children understand: diapers = pee/poop, underwear = different expectation Body Boss Language Framework Replace “big kid” language with “body boss”     •    Avoids developmental struggle of wanting to be big vs baby     •    Emphasizes empowerment and body ownership     •    “You have an important job” vs “you’re a big kid”     •    Normalize “listening to your body” and “taking care of your body” across all activities Key phrases to use     •    “Missing the signal” instead of asking “did you poop?”     •    “Your body’s figuring out how to feel comfortable” vs “you should be able to…”     •    “It’s not happening yet” vs “it’s not happening”     •    Tag words: yet, soon, just a matter of time Handling Poop Resistance Treat peeing and pooping as separate skills     •    Different body parts, consistency, pressure     •    Give permission to ask for pull-up when feeling poop urge     •    Celebrate progress: “toilet bowl is half full” Prevent withholding behaviors     •    Getting poop out of body trumps potty success     •    Withholding causes constipation, behavioral issues, reduced bandwidth     •    Offer dignified alternatives (pull-up, permission to soil underwear) Response approach     •    Reduce adult energy/focus around the struggle area     •    Slow things down, reduce urgency     •    Continue indirect learning without performance pressure Practical Implementation Potty equipment choices     •    Offer both little potty and toilet seat attachment     •    Let child choose which feels safer     •    Feet firmly planted important for bowel movements Nighttime readiness     •    5 consecutive nights of dry pull-ups     •    Check earlier than usual wake time to distinguish holding vs morning release Launching process     •    Start at home, not school     •    Long weekend good for formal launch     •    Don’t go back and forth between diapers/underwear (confusing)     •    Reset to diapers okay if stress becomes excessive Resources & Support Diaper Doggy book     •    Creates ritual for transition (like Tooth Fairy)     •    Uses body boss language throughout     •    Available at Barnes & Noble (not Amazon) Joan’s consultation services     •    Virtual coaching: $25/30min, $50/hour through medical practice     •    Personalized social stories available     •    Works with families nationwide Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join her Teen Parenting Series here! https://forms.office.com/pages/responsepage.aspx?id=DQSIkWdsW0yxEjajBLZtrQAAAAAAAAAAAANAATFIR4xURU9NQkc4WUVOSklLMURaVlJNUkdCWjZXMC4u&route=shorturl Mindy's Website https://growwithusacademy.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

www.patreon.com/mrchazz Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices