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What if your anxiety, panic, or depression isn't something you need to get rid of—but something you need to learn to listen to? In this Extended Edition of Winning the War for Your Heart, Laura Duncan shares what to listen for in Brian  story as he recounts the night panic entered his life and the four words— “It’s as bad as it feels” —that became his first experience with real compassion. Laura returns at the end to go deeper into what it means to process emotional pain instead of pushing it away and how we can begin listening to what our pain is trying to tell us. 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

What if emotional healing isn’t about fixing your pain — but discovering who you were created to be? In this episode of Winning the War for Your Heart, Brian Freise — author of Above All Else — sits down with Laura Duncan, creator of the Compassion Method and the person who walked Brian through his own healing journey. Together, they explore what happens when we stop trying to fix, suppress, or shame our pain and instead learn to bring compassion, comfort, and connection to what’s happening inside us. Brian shares how emotional healing changed his relationship with himself, his family, his faith, and even the way he sees other people's differences. He opens up about the vulnerability of writing Above All Else, why men and leaders often feel pressure to hide their emotions, and how learning to feel his pain helped him become more connected to his true self. At the heart of the conversation is a powerful question: What if healing isn't the final destination? What if healing is the doorway to becoming fully who you were created to be? 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

Your greatest superpower is learning to be okay when it's not okay all around you. In Episode 6 of Winning the War for Your Heart, Brian Freise — author of Above All Else — gives you the most practical tool in the Compassion Method arsenal: the Remote Control Exercise. Brian walks through the exact 5-step process he uses every time a trigger fires, the 3 tender emotions hiding underneath every reaction, and the moment he realized his rice-picking-up reflex was the same pattern running his entire life. If you've ever felt like you can't be okay until your external world is fixed — this is the episode that gives you back your power.  📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

What if even the conditions that feel most hopeless, the ones you've been told no one can help, aren't the end of your story? In this episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Freise open the mailbag for a wide-ranging round of listener questions, from mental health to matters of faith. It's an honest, compassionate conversation that meets people right where they're stuck and offers real hope without ever over-promising. They begin with a tender one: does the Compassion Method help someone with OCD; the "doubting disease" where hope can feel scarce?  Laura responds with deep empathy and reframes obsessive thinking as a protector, a survival strategy a child built to counter a world that felt too out of control, and explains how bringing in love and unmet needs can help the brain rewire and let those thoughts go.  She extends the same hope to bipolar and other conditions she's encountered across 15 years of clients, always alongside, never in place of, the medical care people need.  Then two faith questions: first, a listener worried that "using God as medicine" meant they shouldn't bring their pain to Him.  Laura clarifies that it's the opposite, that medicating with God meant not actually bringing Him her pain. The second, whether the method is built on universalism, which Laura answers plainly (it isn't), while sharing her belief in Jesus and her wonder at the free will God preserves in us. In this episode:  🔹 Can the Compassion Method help with OCD? Reframing obsessive thinking as a protector the brain can rewire  🔹 Why the same hope extends to bipolar and other conditions — always alongside, never replacing, medical care  🔹 "Using God as medicine," clarified: why it means bringing Him your pain, not staying away from Him  🔹 Is the method based on universalism? Laura answers directly — and on free will and the Garden  🔹 Why separation from God can come through unhealed pain, not just obvious sin Dive deeper with these two great resources! 👇 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book! 📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion  Two quick notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868

Compassion is what love feels like in the trenches. In Episode 5 of Winning the War for Your Heart, Brian Freise — author of Above All Else — exposes the most misunderstood force in the universe. Brian breaks down the difference between pity and compassion, the brutal truth that enablement is not compassion (it's selfishness in disguise), and the Jesus story that wrecked his entire view of what it means to be tender. If you've ever dismissed compassion as soft, weak, or "not for real men" — Episode 5 is your wake-up call. If you've ever felt like love is just a feeling, this is the episode that turns it into a force. 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

You're not the horrible person you think you are. In Episode 4 of Winning the War for Your Heart, Brian Freise — author of Above All Else — exposes the origins of shame and the prison it builds inside every human heart. Brian walks through the Genesis 3 moment when Adam and Eve's eyes were opened to a story of deficiency God never intended, the cosmic blame game that's been echoing through every family argument since, and the inside-out reframe that broke his own shame cycle: "No one or nothing shames us from the outside. We do it to ourselves." If you've ever felt like your failures define you — this is where you start to untangle who you are from what you do. 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

You're not broken. You were never broken. In Episode 3 of Winning the War for Your Heart, Brian Freise — author of Above All Else — shares the first words Laura Duncan said to him when he walked into her office asking to be fixed. Brian opens up about the 8-year-old photo exercise that cracked his heart open, the four core deficiencies he discovered in his own childhood, and the orphanage analogy that explains why so many Christians feel stuck despite knowing the truth of their new identity in Christ. If you've ever felt like the Bible's promises don't match your reality — this is where the disconnect starts to make sense. 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

Why do we do the stupid things we do? And why, in the moment, does it feel so impossible to stop? In Episode 2 of Winning the War for Your Heart, Brian Freise shares the story of a Starbucks fight that he was afraid would end his marriage—and the surprising conversation with Laura that helped him understand what was really happening beneath his reaction. Brian explores what happens when your primal brain takes over, how to recognize when you're triggered, and why understanding your reactions can change the way you respond. He also shares the “fun sucker” nickname his family had given him, and how that uncomfortable realization helped him discover that he wasn't simply a grumpy person—he was hurting. If you've ever looked back after a reaction and thought, Why did I just do that? this episode will help you understand where that reaction may have come from. 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

Welcome to Winning the War for Your Heart, a special series based on Brian Freise's book, Above All Else. What if your anxiety, panic, or depression isn't something you need to get rid of—but something you actually need to learn to listen to? In Episode 1, Brian tells the story of the night pain invaded his life in a way he could no longer ignore, numb, or outrun. Brian takes us back to November 2018, when panic walked into his life uninvited, the ER visit he was ashamed to make, and the moment four words—"It's as bad as it feels"—became his first brush with real compassion. If you've ever felt broken, behind, or completely out of control, this is where Brian's journey begins. In this episode, you'll discover: Why "I'm going to push through this" can actually keep you from healingHow Brian's "Great Awakening" changed his relationship with emotionThe difference between soul neglect and genuine self-careWhy "Above all else, guard your heart" is about stewardship—not simply protectionWhy emotional pain doesn't heal the same way physical pain doesWhat to do when anxiety shows up in the middle of the night📕 Get the book that started the journey Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book!

What if feeling stuck, like you've slipped backward in your healing, isn't a sign the work has failed, but a sign it's finally you've grown more than you think? In this episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Friese continue their series on how the Compassion Method brings biblical truths to life, this time turning to perseverance, and what to do when your emotional and spiritual growth feels like it's stalled. Brian talks openly about the very human urge to give up when the process feels slow, when no clear milestone appears to be reached, and when people find it tempting to think, "This just isn't working for me." It's learning to be: with yourself, with others, and with God. Together they unpack why we get the order backward, trying to "do to be" instead of "being to do", and why understanding without application only medicates our pain instead of healing it.  Laura explains why simplicity creates the consistency that actually rewires the heart and brain, and why chasing the next book or the next technique can feel like progress while quietly keeping us stuck. They dive into the freeing truth for anyone ready to walk away: many of us try to escape our pain by cutting off the marriage, the job, or the church.  But drawing on James 1 and Brian's own writing, Laura invites a braver path—turning into the storm within, letting it do its work, and discovering we can often be okay in the very relationships we thought we had to leave.  Like the "wax on, wax off" of the Karate Kid, the unseen work is building the muscle for the "I get it" moment, and the times we most want to give up are usually right before it finally clicks. In this episode:  🔹 Why hitting a plateau—or feeling like you've gone backward—is normal, and often a sign that genuine change is happening  🔹 The myth of "arriving," and the shift from "doing to be" to "being to do"  🔹 What "being" actually looks like day to day—and why understanding without application only medicates the pain  🔹 Why simplicity and consistency, not more information, are what truly rewire the heart and brain  🔹 How to "turn into the storm within you" and persevere—so you rarely have to cut off the relationships, churches, or jobs you thought you had to leave Dive deeper with these two great resources! 👇 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book! 📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion — two short notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868

What if the reason prayer feels so difficult has less to do with your faith—and more to do with the wounds you've carried since childhood? In this episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Friese continue their series on how the Compassion Method brings biblical truths to life by exploring prayer, forgiveness, loving your enemies, and other commands that often feel impossible to live out. Brian vulnerably shares a childhood memory that helped him understand why prayer had always felt like talking into the void. Although he believed God loved him, he struggled to believe God truly cared to hear him.  Laura helps trace that struggle back to a past experience of not feeling heard, revealing how our relationships with earthly caregivers often shape the way we experience our relationship with God. Together, they unpack a freeing truth: many of the hardest commands in Scripture become natural—not through trying harder—but through healing the places in our hearts that keep us from experiencing God's love.  When our wounds receive compassion, obedience becomes the fruit of relationship instead of the burden of performance. In this episode: 🔹 Brian's personal story of why prayer felt so difficult—and the childhood wound that helped explain it 🔹 How early experiences with parents and caregivers can shape the way we relate to God 🔹 Why biblical commands like prayer, forgiveness, and loving your enemies become possible through healing rather than willpower 🔹 The difference between behavior management and allowing God to transform your heart from the inside out 🔹 How the Compassion Method helps remove the barriers that keep you from experiencing a deeper relationship with God and others Dive deeper with these two great resources! 👇 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book! 📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion — two short notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868

What if the Christian life was never meant to be about trying harder, but about healing deeply enough that love becomes natural? In this episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Friese continue their conversation about faith and emotional healing by exploring one of the biggest misunderstandings in the Christian life: the difference between producing the fruit of the Spirit and trying to manufacture it through willpower. Using Galatians 5 as the foundation, Laura explains why Scripture calls love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, and self-control fruit—not accomplishments.  Fruit isn't something we force; it's the natural result of a healthy root. In the same way, emotional healing and a deep relationship with God create the conditions where Christlike character grows from the inside out. Rather than leaving listeners with another list of spiritual behaviors to achieve, this episode offers a freeing invitation: stop striving to look like Jesus, and begin allowing Him to heal the places that keep His life from flowing naturally through you. In this episode: 🔹 Why the fruit of the Spirit is something God grows in us—not something we produce through willpower 🔹 How emotional healing removes the wounded patterns that keep Christlike character from flowing naturally 🔹 The connection between the Compassion Method, inner healing, and spiritual transformation 🔹 Why trying harder often leads to frustration—and why a relationship with God leads to lasting change 🔹 How healing your heart allows love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, and self-control to become the natural overflow of your life Dive deeper with these two great resources! 👇 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book! 📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion — two short notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868

What if the healing that's transforming your heart is more biblical than you've been led to believe? In this episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Friese continue their conversation about common objections to the Compassion Method by addressing one of the biggest questions they hear from Christians: Is this process actually biblical? Laura shares her own faith journey and explains how her relationship with God shaped the development of the Compassion Method from the very beginning.  Together, she and Brian explore why emotional healing and Christian faith never compete with one another—they have always been connected. Looking at Scripture through the lens of relationship rather than performance, they unpack how compassion, emotional awareness, and healing have been woven into God's heart all along. Rather than asking listeners to take their word for it, Laura points back to the life of Jesus, the Garden of Eden, and the consistent biblical pattern of God moving toward people in their pain before inviting them into transformation.  It's a conversation for anyone who's wondered whether emotional healing can truly deepen—not diminish—their walk with God. In this episode: 🔹 Laura shares how her own relationship with God led to the development of the Compassion Method 🔹 Why the Compassion Method is rooted in biblical principles of relationship, compassion, and restoration rather than self-improvement 🔹 What Scripture reveals about God's response to shame, pain, and emotional brokenness—from the Garden of Eden to the life of Jesus 🔹 The difference between healing through relationships and striving through performance or religious obligation 🔹 How emotional awareness and self-compassion can strengthen your Christian faith by helping you experience God's love more personally Dive deeper with these two great resources! 👇 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book! 📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion — two short notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868

What if the emotions you've spent your whole life trying to avoid are actually trying to help you heal? In this episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Friese tackle one of the most common objections to the Compassion Method: "Shouldn't I ignore my feelings instead of paying attention to them?"  Together, they unpack why so many of us fear our emotions, where that fear comes from, and why learning to feel your pain is essential to emotional healing—not a threat to it. Laura explains that most of us didn't learn to distrust our emotions as adults—we learned it as children. When our feelings were ignored, shamed, or met with disconnection, we naturally came to believe that emotions were dangerous.  But emotions themselves aren't the problem. They're faithful messengers, revealing what's happening in our hearts and pointing us toward the places that still need compassion and comfort. Rather than letting emotions "drive the car," Laura offers a healthier picture: your true self stays in the driver's seat while your emotions are finally welcomed into the conversation.  Healing begins when we stop fighting what we feel and start understanding why we feel it. In this episode: 🔹 Why so many people believe feeling their emotions is dangerous—and where that belief usually begins 🔹 The difference between letting emotions guide your decisions and allowing them to reveal what your heart needs 🔹 How childhood experiences of shame and disconnection teach us to suppress our feelings instead of processing them 🔹 Why emotions are reliable indicators of what's happening inside you—even when they aren't telling you what to do 🔹 How the Compassion Method helps you feel your pain, receive comfort, and respond from your true self instead of your triggered self Dive deeper with these two great resources! 👇 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book! 📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion — two short notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868

What if the questions you keep asking are actually pointing you toward the healing you've been looking for? In this special Q&A episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Friese answer listener questions about emotional healing, the Compassion Method, trauma, learning, and what it really looks like to grow when life feels overwhelming. From navigating new challenges and emotional triggers to understanding how the brain learns, Laura offers practical, compassionate guidance for questions many listeners wrestle with every day.  Along the way, the conversation reminds us that healing isn't about getting everything right the first time—it's about becoming curious, staying present with yourself, and allowing each challenge to become an opportunity for growth. Whether you're wondering why certain situations keep triggering you, how to apply the Compassion Method in real life, or simply need encouragement to keep going, this episode offers honest answers and hope-filled perspectives rooted in both neuroscience and compassion. In this episode: 🔹 Why learning something new often feels emotionally triggering—and what your brain is doing in those moments 🔹 Listener questions about trauma, emotional healing, and applying the Compassion Method in everyday life 🔹 The difference between reacting from old survival patterns and responding from your true self 🔹 Why curiosity and self-compassion create lasting growth far better than self-criticism or perfectionism 🔹 Practical encouragement for anyone who feels stuck, discouraged, or unsure whether healing is really happening Dive deeper with these two great resources! 👇 📕 Get your copy of  Brian's book Above All Else: Winning the War for Your Heart Click here to get the book! 📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion — two short notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868