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The first month of the reading death match has passed, and your fighters are already at each other's throats. Sarah promises that this time she's really going to do it. Cyrus swears that everyone's hatred only makes them stronger. Who is in the lead? Who will end up full of knife wounds at the bottom of the stairs??? Only time will tell... Support the show

Ole Sarah needs a win, and by GOD she is going to get one. Or else she is making that everyone else's problem. In this episode, we hash out the rules for the contest that will finally tear us apart: Who Can Read More Books This Year. First half of the episode, we litigate exactly that that means. Second half of the episode? Establishing the stakes. Come 2027, this house might have a soft serve machine or PS5, but it will DEFINITELY have a homemade garden statue of one of us with the word "WINNER" underneath.  Support the show

We're back on that Animorphs grind, this time covering The Test, The Unexpected, The Revelation, The Deception, and The Resistance. And guys, these books that are meant for children are getting DEEP into what constitutes a war crime, what it means to sacrifice a loved one for the greater good, and how cool it would be to be a kangaroo.  Support the show

It doesn't get much zeitgeist-ier than this episode's book, Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir, a non-political (press f to doubt) hard sci-fi about overcoming your own pathetic cowardice and saving the universe all by yourself except with ten thousand other people and also an alien. Also it's REALLY HOT, but our hosts only complain about it a little bit, I swear.  Support the show

This week, Sarah and Cyrus take a look at back at their lofty goals for 2026 and see how far along they're getting in their TBR piles - as expected, it quickly devolves into a competition, as these things often to. Come and hang out with us as we go over the books our intrepid readers have loved and hated so far this year, with a sidebar into abusing the cat and contemplating whether or not it's time to use the Desk Gun.  Support the show

In this episode, EPIC HIGHS AND LOWS! The heady rush of triumph, the crushing blow of betrayal, the anguish of stealing failure from the jaws of success: all this and more can be found in Sarah's beloved HelloChinese app. We discuss Sarah's attempts at teaching herself Chinese, through the lens of "Fluent Forever: How to Learn Any Language Fast and Never Forget It" by Gabriel Wyner. You'd be surprised at how much you can learn from Arnold Schwarzenegger exploding a dog.  Support the show

This week, two idiots discuss a third. We read Apparently, Sir Cameron Needs to Die by Greer Stothers, the story of a craven buffoon and the a*****e he's pestering. We saw a lot of ourselves in the characters. But first, we take a long walk through the Wichita airport, fast food moral failings, and United's war of attrition on the human psyche. Like we do talk about the book to be clear, but much like us on our recent travel day, it sure does take us a while to get anywhere.  Support the show

Want to know a secret? Cleaning sucks. Want to know an even bigger secret? There are books that are supposed to help you deal with how much cleaning sucks! This week, Cyrus and Sarah dive into a few different nonfiction books about how to keep your space clean to see if any of it seems helpful. Spoiler alert - a huge chunk of this episode is about vibrators. You've been warned.  Support the show

This week we're talking about the ultimate topic writers love to talk about: writing. God, writers love talking about writing. Cyrus takes a break from cranking out their novel to issue death threats and discuss their evolving take on imposter syndrome. Sarah indulges in a little therapy and discloses her top five coping techniques. Suicide Squad and Tremors both feature more than you might expect. All statements about killing Tom Cruise are just quirky lil jokes :3 Support the show

Hello, everyone, welcome to this episode posted exactly on time where Sarah and Cyrus discuss the romance series of the moment, The Gay Hockey One That Now Has a TV Show. But first, 13 minutes of b******t. We really make you wait for it. And we also spend a lot of time on Game Changers, the first book in the series which Sarah read and Cyrus didn't. You know how bad books sometimes demand conversation more than good ones? Also. Sweat. We discuss a lot of sweat. My dudes, this episode is all over the place. Enjoy? Support the show

Dark romance should be DARKER!!! But where is the line? This week we approach that age-old question through the lens of Captive Prince, a 2016 novel by C.S. Pacat, especially in comparison to the dark/taboo romance more popular today. We talk about censorship, purity politics, and the way that Amazon's restrictions on self-publishing content shapes the trends and tropes in romance today. Featuring a special guest star who finally SOLVES the issue of censorship vs freedom of expression forever! Yippee, we did it!  (This episode contains spoilers for the three books in the Captive Prince trilogy) Content warnings: Discussions involving sexual assault, bestiality, and pedophilia.  Support the show

It's a book! An actual book! Can you believe it? This week, Sarah and Cyrus read 'There Is No Antimemetics Division" by qntm, a novel that was originally a web serial about the SCP foundation, but has since found a home with its serial numbers filed off in tradpublishing. Sarah knows a little bit about SCP, Cyrus knows nothing, and they spend a good chunk of the episode trying and failing to come up with a tagline for this podcast.  Support the show

This week Cyrus and Sarah each bring their book stacks to the table to discuss what they are planning to read this year. They get immediately sidetracked into an argument about how many books you should have in your "to read" pile, how many books you should have in general, when you should decide to give a book away, and--most importantly--the most recent ways Cyrus nearly died due to hubris. Sarah is literally stunned speechless. Cyrus has learned nothing. They both have some ambitious reading goals for 2026.  Support the show

At long last, the moment we've all been waiting for: Cyrus has finally obtained their white whale du jour, two specimens of the world's tallest chicken. Also it's the end of the year! Here is the big breakdown of all the books we read, enjoyed, were let down by, and thought about a lot. Cyrus has detailed stats from their spreadsheets and Sarah will die before giving up her beloved Book of Books. It's not a numbers game, but Sarah won.  Support the show

Hello, gang, time for the annual oopsie episode where we acknowledge the sins of our past (not uploading podcast episodes) and lay out our plans to change in the future (start three more podcast?). We catch up on life then eventually discuss THE question we return to again and again: what do you do when your TBR list gets too daunting. Cyrus discusses the frustration of false starts. Sarah gives up on the young adult genre. No shovels were harmed in the making of this episode, which makes these 50 or so minutes completely unique compared to the rest of Cyrus's enterprises.  Support the show