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***Trigger Warning: Domestic Violence - 39:00-39:44 Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 214 - "Self Love Series - What do to when wounds pop up along the way?" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide As we've talked about in previous episodes, it takes mindful effort and work to achieve self love. When we feel as though we may be moving backwards on our journey, it can have us questioning where we're truly at. The good news is, not everything is as it appears on the surface. Join us as we continue our series on self love and discuss how to use the antidotes found in our self connection layers to heal our past wounds and become more solid in our self love journey. In this episode we cover: Why Claire is now accessorizing with a crownWhen life happens along our self love journeyThe main indicator that a past wound needs healingThe antidote and healing our past woundsHealing through the layers of self connectionHow to get the donkey out of the wellSurpassing the experience to get to the goalSwitching focus from working the process to enjoying itTrigger Warning - Domestic Violence - 39:00-39:44Looking at the bigger picture - our client's experience as she goes through this processSome context for our next episodes about the relationship connection journeyJoe questions his love of SerenaThe experience of love we know vs the experience of love that is possibleThe difference between loving energy and being in relationship Episode References: The tah-dah list episode - Episode 153 - The power of whimsy when meeting your needsPodcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 213 - "Self Love Series: The behaviors that can heal your self love wounds" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide How can we love ourselves if we don't even like ourselves? Well, the short answer is we can't. The good news is, now that we know about the unsupportive and supportive levels of self connection, we can learn how to actually move from unsupportive to supportive. Join us this week as we discuss the behaviors that heal our self love wounds, and how to use these behaviors to move through the layers on our self love journey. In this episode we cover: Claire's confession and why we're not getting into our level of connection with others this weekWhere our inability to love ourselves usually stems fromAcknowledging the level we're truly atThe positive and negative relationships between self love and needs being metUsing the layers of self connection to move along our self love journeyHow do you stop hating yourself?The antidotes for beginning to release toxic behaviorsThe simple phrase that has helped many of our clientsThe behaviors that can heal the self love woundsCreating the next layers of connection with ourselvesEmbracing our inner weirdosTaking the time to create, sustain and embody our self connection Episode References: The unsupportive self connection episode - Episode 211 - Self Love Series: Unsupportive self connectionThe supportive self connection episode - Episode 212 - Self Love Series: Supportive self connectionTrauma series -Episode 86 - What is trauma?Episode 87 - How do you identify trauma Episode 88 - How to heal trauma and triggersThe toxic positivity episode - Episode 39 - Just HOW toxic is Toxic Positivity?The episode about hard and soft boundaries - Episode 101 - Boundaries Series: What exactly ARE boundaries?The episode where we talk about the Star Trek shields - Episode 28 - An antidote to anxietyThe but/and episode - Episode 143 - Get your But out of here Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 212 - "Self love Series: Supportive self connection" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide As the episode title says, self love is a journey and our journey together continues. This week we'll be discussing the supportive end of the self connection spectrum. Tune in to find out how we can begin creating our own paths to self love. In this episode we cover: Review of the self-connection spectrumSerena learns a new wordWhat levels are in the supportive self connection spectrum?The behaviors that show up in each of the supportive spectrum layersWhy the layers are ordered as they areHow we can begin to create and move closer to self loveThe levels of learning and how they apply to the self love journeyAntidotes to the unsupportive self connection spectrumWhat's got Serena thinking of ballsThe client who thought they were further along their self love journeyFeeling vs showing - how do you treat yourself when you are at these levels Episode References: The unsupportive self connection episode - Episode 211 - Self Love Journey - Unsupportive self connectionThe Selfirst Series - Episode 20 - Selfirst Series: What is Selfirst? Let's get specific…Episode 21 - Selfirst Series: The difference between doing harm and not meeting needs that were never your responsibilityEpisode 22 - Selfirst Series: A safe space vs a comfortable space, how a comfortable space can actually cost your needsThe episode about the difference between nice and kind - Episode 67 - People Pleasing Series - The problem with putting others firstThe Guilt and Shame Series -Episode 43 - The difference between guilt and shameEpisode 44 - That's not guilt, it's shame in disguiseEpisode 45 - That's not guilt, it's an attempt at manipulating your humanityThe episode where we talk about the levels of learning - Episode 35 - Self worth Series: The link between self worth and self careThe episode about the Love Need variation - Episode 200 - One of the Universal Needs is CHANGING!The Shapes Series - Episode 159 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 1) - The Victim ApproachEpisode 160 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 2) - The Persecutor ApproachEpisode 161 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 3) - The Rescuer ApproachEpisode 162 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 4) - Why the Rescuer Approach is so harmfulThe Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe Supporter Approach episode - Episode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 6) - The Supporter ApproachThe Contributor Approach episode - Episode 165 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 7) - The Contributor ApproachThe other "shapes" episodes -Moving from disempowering to empowering - Episode 166 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 8) - How to move from a disempowering approach to meeting your needs to an empowering oneThe Harm Dynamic episode - Episode 167 - The Harm Dynamic (AKA the abuse dynamic) - focusing on actual harm and the impact of it (Shapes 9)Episode 168 - How do the Interaction Dynamics apply to children and power dynamics? (Shapes 10)Episode 169 - Understanding the shapes in the context of movies Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 211 - "Self love Series: Unsupportive self connection" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Weeeeeeeee're Baaaaaaaaaack! It's the first episode of season 5 and we're going on a journey...a self love journey that is. There's a lot of pressure in today's society to love ourselves and the truth of the matter is, many people don't love themselves. On this episode we're going to get into the unsupportive stops along our self love journey that are important in getting to our destination. Tune in to find out how just because we don't feel the love doesn't mean we are not on the journey to do so. In this episode we cover: How one "simple" slide in our program turned into (at least) a four episode seriesThe misconceptions about self loveThe three parts to the self-connection spectrumWhat levels are in the unsupportive self connection spectrum?The behaviors that show up in each of the unsupportive spectrum layersStarting with the small wins, small steps and small thingsOwning where we are at, not where we "should be" and moving in the direction of self loveNot realizing when we're actually on the self love journeyFaking it till we make itThe action of loveHow to begin showing love to ourselves Episode References: The episode on the small wins and small steps - Episode 174 - Just one small thingThe episode about not meeting needs that aren't your responsibility - Episode 21 - Selfirst Series: The difference between doing harm and not meeting needs that were never your responsibilityThe Empowerment Ecosystem episodes -The Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe Supporter Approach episode - Episode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 6) - The Supporter ApproachThe Contributor Approach episode - Episode 165 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 7) - The Contributor Approach Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 210 - "SEASON FINALE: Why you're never to old to learn how to meet your needs (or to benefit from them being met)" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Do you believe it's too late to make a significant change in your life? If so, you're not alone. Change can be hard and uncomfortable and it can also be the thing that leads us to true happiness and fulfillment. Join us on this episode where we're talking all about change and how it's never too late to learn to begin meeting your needs and start making the changes in your life and relationships that will have you living your best life. In this episode we cover: What's in store for our season breakThe difference between something working and just being familiarUsing tools to get us to our destination fasterComing to terms with change and the best time to make changeHow to change and navigate those changesThe importance of choice in changeLetting go of what isn't workingMicrodosing changeStarting where we have the capacity and then testing your capacityAn invitation for during the break Episode References: The episode on microdosing discomfort - Episode 209 - Microdosing discomfort to build your capacity for itThe episode on supportive discomfort - Episode 188 - What is supportive discomfort?The episode about the life conveyor belt - 136 - Why you might not WANT the goal that you THINK you do…especially when it comes to weight lossThe episode on resilience - Episode 51 - How to increase your resilienceThe Empowerment Ecosystem episodes -The Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe Supporter Approach episode - Episode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 6) - The Supporter ApproachThe Contributor Approach episode - Episode 165 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 7) - The Contributor ApproachPodcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 209 - "How you can microdose supportive discomfort to build your capacity for it" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Most of us do not like being uncomfortable and will do whatever we can to avoid it. What if we told you the path to comfort often lies in being uncomfortable. Tune in to today's episode where we discuss how to build our capacity for supportive discomfort and find out how microdosing discomfort can actually help us to create more of what we want in life. In this episode we cover: The seasons are changing...ours not the weatherThe comfort we want to be focusing on and whyWhat we mean when we say microdose discomfortIdentifying the needs that are up when we are uncomfortableHow we can begin microdosing discomfortMicrodosing discomfort in your relationshipsChoosing the right people to microdose withClearing niggles with others and yourselfWhat to consider before microdosing discomfortAcknowledging the discomfortComing out on the other side of microdosing discomfortThe role our nervous system plays in microdosingWhen we're on the receiving end of the uncomfortable conversation Episode References: The episode on supportive discomfort - Episode 188 - What is supportive discomfort?The episode on unsupportive discomfort - Episode 189 - Why it's not always helpful to get comfortable with being uncomfortableThe clearing niggles episode - Episode 61 - Friendship Series: Clearing NigglesThe shoulda, woulda, coulda episode - Episode 208 - Shoulda, woulda, coulda down the shame spiralThe gremlin episode - Episode 199 - Do you have an inner Gremlin? Are you feeding it without realizing?The episode about the relationship orbits - Episode 17 - Apology Series: What to do when you're waiting for an apology that will never comePodcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

***Trigger Warning - Death of parent, caring for sick parent Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 208 - "Shoulding Series - Shoulda, woulda, coulda down the shame spiral" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Shoulda, woulda, coulda...we know we've said it more than once and we don't believe we are alone in that. The past can be full of shoulda, woulda, couldas that are impacting our needs in the present. In this episode we're going to talk about facing and dealing with our shoulds and how to turn shoulda, woulda, coulda into something that will actually support our needs. In this episode we cover: Looking at and resourcing your needs in the presentThe guilt and shame tracks and where they both leadCatching yourself on the shame spiralIs it better to stay in the present or return to the pastDealing with shoulds when we can't redo themSerena's trip down the shame spiral when her mom passed awayThe importance of giving ourselves graceFinding which unresolved barriers are holding us backThe gifts within the shouldsDealing with shoulds when we can redo themApplying past shoulds to present actionsThe alternative to shoulda, woulda, coulda Episode References: The first episode in our Shoulding Series - Episode 206 - Shoulding Series - Why shoulding on yourself, or others, negatively impacts your needsThe second episode in our Shoulding Series - Episode 207 - How to shift your shouldsThe Guilt and Shame Series -Episode 43 - The Guilt & Shame Series: The difference between guilt and shameEpisode 44 - The Guilt & Shame Series: That's not guilt, it's shame in disguiseEpisode 45 - The Guilt & Shame Series: That's not guilt, it's an attempt at manipulating your humanityThe episode we refer to the inner critic - Episode 92 - How to deal with the inner critic and inner saboteurThe Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe Shapes Series - Episode 159 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 1) - The Victim ApproachEpisode 160 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 2) - The Persecutor ApproachEpisode 161 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 3) - The Rescuer ApproachEpisode 162 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 4) - Why the Rescuer Approach is so harmfulThe Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe Supporter Approach episode - Episode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 6) - The Supporter ApproachThe Contributor Approach episode - Episode 165 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 7) - The Contributor ApproachThe other "shapes" episodes -Moving from disempowering to empowering - Episode 166 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 8) - How to move from a disempowering approach to meeting your needs to an empowering oneThe Harm Dynamic episode - Episode 167 - The Harm Dynamic (AKA the abuse dynamic) - focusing on actual harm and the impact of it (Shapes 9)Episode 168 - How do the Interaction Dynamics apply to children and power dynamics? (Shapes 10)Episode 169 - Understanding the shapes in the context of movies Notes: Download The Apology Blueprint PDF here: https://theuniversalneeds.com/Apology Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 207 - "Shoulding Series - How to shift your shoulds" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Sometimes we just have too much content. Well, we don't actually think that's a thing and if you tuned in last week you know we did have too much for one episode. Join us this week as we continue our conversation about the impact the word "should" has on our needs (and the needs of others) and begin to learn how to shift our shoulds into something that will actually serve us.  In this episode we cover: Identifying where the "should" is coming from (only if you want to)If a "should" causes a rift in a relationshipReplacing the word should and connecting with Personal PowerBeing aware of shoulds close friendsHow we shift language and dismantle the "should"The importance of finishing the sentenceDetermining the consequences of doing or not doing the "should"Shoulds rightful place in apologiesWhy "should not" isn't any betterWhen the "should" is focused on you Episode References: The first episode in our Shoulding Series - Episode 206 - Shoulding Series - Why shoulding on yourself, or others, negatively impacts your needsThe episode on boundaries and control - Episode Episode 101 - Boundaries Series: What exactly ARE boundaries?The Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe relationship orbits episode - Episode 17 - Apology Series: What to do when you're waiting for an apology that will never come The Supporter Approach episode - Episode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 6) - The Supporter Approach Notes: Phrases that seem to be one thing but mean another when you add the end of the sentenceA jack of all trades is a master of none, but often times better than a master of oneThe blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the wombCuriosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 206 - "Shoulding Series - Why shoulding on yourself, or others, negatively impacts your needs" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide We should on ourselves, we should on others and we let people should on us...it's just shouldy all around. If you haven't guessed, today we're talking about the word "should". Join us on this episode where we're getting into "should", it's impact on our needs and what we can do if we find ourselves in a shouldy situation. In this episode we cover: Shoulding all over ourselvesWhat's the problem with "should"?Removing the perception of choiceIntroducing expectationsThe impact of "should" on our needsHow the needs work allowed Serena to eat chocolate cake without guiltFeeling guilt and shame around "should"The subtext of "should"Figuring out what is really right for us in a situationUniversal social norms and self conditioningWhy people "should" on othersFiguring out what the choice is, so we can make the choice that best meets our needsRe-wording the "should" with yourselfRe-wording the "should" with othersHow to approach beginning to shift our language around "should" Episode References: The episodes about guilt and shame -Episode 43 - The Guilt & Shame Series: The difference between guilt and shameEpisode 44 - The Guilt & Shame Series: That's not guilt, it's shame in disguiseEpisode 45 - The Guilt & Shame Series: That's not guilt, it's an attempt at manipulating your humanityThe episode about interconnectedness - Episode 202 - What is interconnectedness and why is it so critical to getting our needs met?The shapes episode about creating - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe dark side of questions episode: Episode 172 - The darker side of questionsThe episodes about shifting our language - Episode 19 - The C-wordEpisode 40 - Let's absolutely lose the absolutes (although not ALWAYS absolutely...)Episode 113 - Are you struggling with things that you 'have to', 'need to' or 'should' do?Episode 143 - Get your But out of here Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 205 - "Why needs are like cleaning...and how to get motivated to do both" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Many people don't enjoy cleaning but do enjoy the benefits from doing so. The same is often true when it comes to meeting our needs. Tune into today's episode to find out just how much needs and cleaning are a like and how acknowledgement can create progress and progress can create acknowledgement. Sounds like a win-win if you ask us. In this episode we cover: When your needs (or cleaning) take a dip and you're in the holeListening to our capacity instead of our brainHow to begin the journey out of the holeWhat can really help the processClaire's house purseThe importance of acknowledging yourselfCompounding benefits of something without having to do moreHelping to create "bonuses" for the people in our livesGetting stuck in the holeHow to begin getting out of the holeRewiring our brainsWhy acknowledgement is like a boulderTaking the first step, and what to know before doing so Episode References: The just one small thing episode - Episode 174 - Just one small thingThe acknowledgement episode Serena was talking about - Episode 198 - How to acknowledge someone (also check out episode 176 - Why acknowledgment is more important than most people realize)The shapes episodes -The Drama Triangle episodes -The Victim Approach episode - Episode 159 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 1) - The Victim ApproachThe Persecutor Approach episode - 160 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 2) - The Persecutor ApproachThe Rescuer Approach episode - 161 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 3) - The Rescuer ApproachThe Rescuer Approach harm episode - Episode 162 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering (Shapes 4) - Why the Rescuer Approach is so harmfulThe Empowerment Dynamic episodes - The Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachThe Supporter Approach episode - Episode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 6) - The Supporter ApproachThe Contributor Approach episode - Episode 165 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 7) - The Contributor ApproachThe other "shapes" episodes -Moving from disempowering to empowering - Episode 166 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 8) - How to move from a disempowering approach to meeting your needs to an empowering oneThe Harm Dynamic episode - Episode 167 - The Harm Dynamic (AKA the abuse dynamic) - focusing on actual harm and the impact of it (Shapes 9)Episode 168 - How do the Interaction Dynamics apply to children and power dynamics? (Shapes 10)Episode 169 - Understanding the shapes in the context of movies (Shapes 11) Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 204 - "How to navigate your villain era" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide If you joined us last episode, you know we've embraced our villain era and we're back talking about our villainous ways again. This week we're discussing how becoming the best version of yourself in your story can lead you to be the villain in someone else's. Tune in to discover how you can navigate this villain era and possibly help rewrite the storyline so that both people have the opportunity to have the happy ending that serves them best. In this episode we cover: The salad that confuses ClaireBecoming the villain by bettering yourselfWhen you're no longer the person you wereHow linear healing journeys can bring relationships closer together or farther apartOne person's healing can be another person's kryptoniteHealing and removing a trauma bondTrying to convince someone to go on a healing journey they aren't ready or wanting to go onFinding the right professional to support you in your journeyHow Serena's marriage was effected by her own growth and healing journeyWhy you have to really want what is on the other side of a healing/growth journeyHealing isn't one size fits all - why healing the self doesn't necessarily mean healing the relationshipThe threat you pose to others when you are trying to be being a better version of yourselfPlaying out a storyline that is set in stoneChanging the shared storyline and what it takes to do soThe ironic twist some villain stories takeAdmitting and addressing when we're the villain  Episode References: The episode where we talk about how to address things when you screw up - The Apology Blueprint episode - Episode 156 - The 6 essential parts of an effective apology Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 203 - "Why no matter how good you are, you're the villain in someones story" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Have you ever been made into the villain when you didn't do anything wrong? Been there and wore the cape and mask for that. We're now proudly in our villain era and even wearing our green and purple for the occasion. If you aren't sure what we're talking about tune into today's episode where we are going to discuss what it's like to be villainized when you've actually done nothing wrong, why people villainize others and how to check if you are truly in villain status and doing harm to others or just not meeting someone else's needs for them.  In this episode we cover: Why Claire and Serena are ok with being the villain in some people's storyThe role interconnectedness plays in determining a villainThe difference between identity and behaviorInterpreting someones actions through the lens of one's own unmet needsBeing seen as a villain when we were younger vs being seen as one nowDoubling down and creating a super villainVillainizing someone to avoid (potentially) uncomfortable communicationPlacing blame instead of facing accountabilityWhy so many people need a villain to blameWhen setting boundaries gets villainizedImpact over intentionDropping into the Drama TriangleWhy Serena's often considered even more of an a*****e nowGetting labeled the assholeBeing made out to be the villain doesn't mean it's valid and why it's OK to have feelings about this Episode References: The episode on interconnectedness - Episode 202 - What is interconnectedness and why is it so critical to getting our needs met?The selfirst episodes -The Selfirst series- Episode 20 - Selfirst Series: What is Selfirst? Let's get specific…Episode 21 - Selfirst Series: The difference between doing harm and not meeting needs that were never your responsibilityEpisode 22 - Selfirst Series: A safe space vs a comfortable space, how a comfortable space can actually cost your needsThe Shapes Series -The Drama Triangle episodes -The Victim Approach episode - Episode 159 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering - The Victim ApproachThe Persecutor Approach episode - 160 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering - The Persecutor ApproachThe Rescuer Approach episode - 161 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering - The Rescuer ApproachThe Rescuer Approach harm episode - Episode 162 - How to know if the way you're meeting your needs is disempowering - Why the Rescuer Approach is so harmfulThe Empowerment Dynamic episodes -The Creator Approach episode - Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways - The Creator ApproachThe Supporter Approach episode - Episode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways - The Supporter ApproachThe Contributor Approach episode - Episode 165 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways - The Contributor ApproachThe other "shapes" episodes -Moving from disempowering to empowering - Episode 166 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways - How to move from a disempowering approach to meeting your needs to an empowering oneThe Harm Dynamic episode - Episode 167 - The Harm Dynamic (AKA the abuse dynamic) - focusing on actual harm and the impact of it Episode 168 - How do the Interaction Dynamics apply to children and power dynamics? (Shapes 10)Episode 169 - Understanding the shapes in the context of moviesThe episodes on prioritizing short term comfort but creating long term conflict - Episode 188 - What is supportive discomfort?The Boundaries Series - Episode 101 - Boundaries Series: What exactly ARE boundaries?Episode 102 - Boundaries Series: How to know what your boundaries areEpisode 103 - Boundaries Series: How to communicate your boundariesImpact over intention - Episode 41 - Why your intention REALLY doesn’t matter… Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

***Trigger Warning - Abusive relationship dynamics Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 202 - "What is interconnectedness and why is it so critical to getting our needs met?" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Well Shit! This is another one of those topics we could have sworn we recorded, because we reference the topic so much, yet here we are. Not only can this information be helpful, it's literally a foundational piece of the needs work. Today we're talking about interconnectedness. Join us as we get into what interconnectedness is, why it is so critical in getting our needs met and how to apply it to your everyday life. In this episode we cover: What is interconnectednessThe Universal Needs EcosystemPlugging the hole(s) in your bucket that you may not even know existsInterconnectedness in the context of selfirstThe difference between negatively impacting needs and not meeting needs that weren't your responsibilityThe return of the inner child and inner teenagerRecognizing toxic dynamics and creating mutually supportive relationshipsThe "sugar rush" of toxic dynamicsUsing interconnectedness as a lens for making decisionsMaking someones job harder because "it's their job" and its impact to your needsThe feeling of interconnectednessThe roles both action and inaction play in interconnectednessCreating and dismantling environments of permissibility and complicitySeparating the artist from the art - the role interconnectedness plays in the entertainment we choose to support Episode References: The episode where we talk about The Universal Needs Ecosystem - Episode 36 - Self worth Series: Why it's so hard to feel 'enough'The episode where we talk about a bucket with a hole in the bottom - Episode 108 - Why am I so depleted series: What drains your needsThe selfirst episodes -The Selfirst series- Episode 20 - Selfirst Series: What is Selfirst? Let's get specific…Episode 21 - Selfirst Series: The difference between doing harm and not meeting needs that were never your responsibilityEpisode 22 - Selfirst Series: A safe space vs a comfortable space, how a comfortable space can actually cost your needsThe episode about the difference in doing harm and not meeting others needs - Episode 21 - Selfirst Series: The difference between doing harm and not meeting needs that were never your responsibilityThe episode on your inner child - Episode 183 - How to support your inner childThe episode on your inner teenager - Episode 184 - How to support your inner teenagerThe inner critic episode - Episode 92 - How to deal with the inner critic and inner saboteurThe guilt and shame series -Episode 43 - The difference between guilt and shameEpisode 44 - That's not guilt, it's shame in disguiseEpisode 45 - That's not guilt, it's an attempt at manipulating your humanity Notes: Good Place spoiler - 1:22:09-1:25:51 Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 201 - "Why we sometimes hate walking our talk" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide We pride ourselves on walking our talk however, it doesn't mean we always like to do it. Sometimes doing what we know is right for our needs conflicts with what we really want to do. Tune in to find out how getting pissed can mean we get to walk our talk and make the choice that meets our needs best. In this episode we cover: The annoyance of going from "blissful ignorance" to knowing betterWhy Claire recently hated the thought of walking her talkWhat it means when we're looking for reasons to do or not to do somethingWeighing out the optionsThe importance of acknowledging and processing when something sucksThe most important commitment Claire has madeStaying present with where your needs are currently atHow to support your needs best when making difficult decisions Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Sh*t. It really is that simple - Episode 200 - "One of the Universal Needs is CHANGING!" is now LIVE! Full Show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide It's our 200th episode and we're doing something we have never done before. Join us on today's episode as new content is created live and be the first to hear about the change to one of our Universal Needs. This is such an important change that we are doing in 200 episodes in! So this episode is definitely one to watch... In this episode we cover: How far we've come from Serena's bathroom floorOne of the needs is changing...kindaThe need for both love AND connectionThe two aspects of the need - self and othersThe difference between connection and our communityHow to deepen the fulfillment of needs we already have metWhy real connection isn't always possibleMeeting your needs in the context of the Red-Green SpectrumDifferent ways of creating connection and communityThe difference between relationships of convenience and relationships of effortHow issues in relationships can be opportunities to build trustThe difference between being part of community and in communityTricking ourselves into hollow experiences of community Episode References: The origin of Maslow's Hierarchy - Episode 1 - Move over Maslow there are new needs in townThe relationship orbits episode - Episode 154 - What are your relationship orbits, and how can they protect you?The Empowerment Ecosystem episodes -Episode 163 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 5) - The Creator ApproachEpisode 164 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 6) - The Supporter ApproachEpisode 165 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 7) - The Contributor ApproachEpisode 166 - How to meet your needs in empowering ways (Shapes 8) - How to move from a disempowering approach to meeting your needs to an empowering oneThe relationship bank episode - Episode 158 - When giving a second chance is a good idea...and when it isn'tThe Selfirst episode - Episode 20 - Selfirst Series: What is Selfirst? Let's get specific…Podcast Episode guide and full show notes: https://bit.ly/WellShitEpisodeGuide Find our website and connect with us on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/theuniversalneeds Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.