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Today's Scripture: Ephesians 6:10–18 How do you become stronger on the inside when fear, doubt, or temptation threatens to pull you off course? In today's episode, we explore Paul's powerful image of the armor of God—and what it means to develop inner strength without relying on willpower alone. We explore: What it really means to be strong in God The surprising connection between our choices and God's power How to understand spiritual warfare without becoming fixated What helps us stand firm when life feels overwhelming Go Deeper: Read: The Secure Soul and The Secure Soul Companion Guide Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Would we rather be in control than happy? What happens when science, therapy, and sheer determination can't fix what's broken? Is there another way forward? Dr. Anna Lembke, Stanford psychiatrist and bestselling author of Dopamine Nation, joins us for a fascinating conversation about her new book, Radical Surrender: Letting Go in a World Addicted to Control. Anna shares how profound personal loss challenged everything she believed about control, accomplishment, and her place in the world—and led her to an unexpected spiritual awakening. We explore: Why our best efforts sometimes aren't enough When control becomes a substitute for faith The surprising connection between surrender and transformation How to let go of control without giving up our agency How surrender changes us and our relationships How prayer can become a practice of surrender Together, Dr. Alison and Dr. Lembke explore the surprising intersection of psychology, neuroscience, and spirituality. About Dr. Anna Lembke: Dr. Anna Lembke is a professor of psychiatry at Stanford University School of Medicine and Chief of the Stanford Addiction Medicine Dual Diagnosis Clinic. An internationally recognized expert in addiction medicine, she has published more than 100 scholarly works. She is the author of the New York Times bestseller Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence. Get Dr. Anna Lembke’s new book: Radical Surrender: Letting Go in a World Addicted to Control  Learn more about Dr. Anna Lembke here. Get exclusive access to the first 2 chapters of Dr. Alison’s newest book, ⁠The Secure Soul⁠.  Connect further with ⁠@dralisoncook⁠ on Instagram 📖 Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode⁠ here Don't forget to browse this week's sponsors, who make it possible for me to bring you these resources for free + provide you with additional discounts! StoryWorth - Give your loved ones a unique keepsake you’ll all cherish for years—Storyworth! Right now, save up to $20 during Storyworth’s Holiday sale when you go to STORYWORTH.com/bestofyou!  That’s STORYWORTH.com/bestofyou to save up to $20 on your order!  Remi - Use code BESTOFYOU to get 55% off your new night guard from now until the end of this month with Remi Club. Go to shopremi.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 55% off this month with Remi Club. Don’t miss out on the opportunity to save up to 75% this month on select bundles while supplies last! Quince - How you dress affects your mood and you can trust that Quince has you covered in every day sustainable wardrobe staples. Go to ⁠⁠Quince.com/bestofyou⁠⁠ for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! *Some of the links above are Amazon affiliate links. If you choose to purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Jonah 4:1–11 What happens when your anger is justified—but begins to take over? Anger can alert us to injustice, protect us from harm, and help us recognize what matters. But it can also keep us trapped in our own perspective. Through the surprising story of Jonah, we explore what happens when anger becomes entitlement—and how to find a wiser way forward. We explore: The difference between feeling anger and becoming consumed by it Why needing to be "right" can keep us stuck What anger reveals about our need for control How to honor anger without losing perspective Go Deeper: Read Boundaries for Your Soul Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Luke 12:1–7 What happens when the people who are supposed to represent God's love use fear, shame, or control instead? Jesus has some surprisingly strong words for religious leaders who misuse their influence. Today, we explore what happens when religious hypocrisy distorts our view of God—and how to begin finding our way back to what is true. We explore: The hidden danger of religious hypocrisy When spiritual authority becomes manipulation Why questioning a leader can feel so threatening What Jesus says to those who've been hurt Go Deeper: Read The Best of You: Breaking Free from Painful Patterns, Mending the Past, and Discovering Your True Self in God Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Psalm 142:1–5 How do you learn to be content when you're lonely and longing for companionship? Inspired by a listener's heartfelt question, today's episode explores how to honor the ache of loneliness without letting fear determine the rest of your story. We explore: Why loneliness isn't a failure of faith What to do with the fear of being alone forever What contentment really means How to hold both longing and hope Go Deeper: Ryan Kuja's post Episode 134: A Personal Journey Through OCD with Therapist Ryan Kuja Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Romans 7:15 Have you ever wondered why you keep repeating a behavior you genuinely want to change? Sometimes it feels like there's a whole committee meeting inside your mind, with different parts of you pulling in different directions. Understanding these inner tensions can help you break free from old patterns without getting caught in shame and self-criticism. Why different parts of you can want conflicting things What's underneath the habits you can't seem to break How curiosity and compassion create room for change What Paul's words about grace teach us about inner transformation Go Deeper: For more on understanding and caring for the different parts of your soul, read Boundaries for Your Soul and The Secure Soul Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when you believe God loves you, but deep down, you still feel like you have to earn it? For many of us, the way we experienced love growing up shapes the way we relate to God. We may know the right things about his love, yet find ourselves striving to be good enough, serve enough, or do enough to deserve it. In today's conversation, Dr. Alison is joined by beloved author and speaker Stasi Eldredge, whose new book, The Ladder of Love, explores the many ways Scripture invites us into a deeper, more intimate relationship with God. We explore: *How your childhood experiences shape the way you see God *Why knowing you're loved and feeling loved can be so different *7 surprising ways Scripture describes our relationship with God *What it looks like to grow closer to God in everyday life *What Stasi wishes she'd known about God's love years ago Stasi shares her own remarkable journey—from encountering Jesus as a young woman, to struggling with depression and wounds from her childhood, to discovering a relationship with God as Father that transformed how she understood herself and his love. About Stasi Eldredge: Stasi Eldredge is an author and speaker passionate about helping women experience the goodness of God and the transforming love of Jesus. With a background in sociology and decades of ministry experience spanning youth, women, children, and crisis pregnancy support, she is dedicated to helping others grow deeper in their faith and discover the freedom found in Christ.  More Resources: Get Stasi’s new book: Ladder of Love. Learn more about Stasi Eldredge here. Get exclusive access to the first 2 chapters of Dr. Alison’s newest book, ⁠The Secure Soul⁠.  Connect further with ⁠@dralisoncook⁠ on Instagram 📖 Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode⁠ here Don't forget to browse this week's sponsors, who make it possible for me to bring you these resources for free + provide you with additional discounts! Quince - How you dress affects your mood and you can trust that Quince has you covered in every day sustainable wardrobe staples. Go to ⁠⁠Quince.com/bestofyou⁠⁠ for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! *Some of the links above are Amazon affiliate links. If you choose to purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Exodus 16:4, 16, 19 When you're facing an uncertain future, it's natural to want a plan, some reassurance, or a glimpse of how everything will turn out. But what happens when God doesn't give you the clarity you're hoping for? The Israelites' experience in the wilderness offers a surprising lesson about uncertainty, daily provision, and learning to trust God one day at a time. We explore: Why uncertainty can make us long for the familiarity of the past The difference between wise planning and trying to control the future What the Israelites' daily manna teaches us about trusting God How to recognize what's yours to do today—and what isn't yours to control Go Deeper: Episode 208 Spiritual Dryness, Burnout, and the Desert Seasons of Faith with Tish Harrison Warren Read I Shouldn't Feel This Way Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: John 15:12–13 Jesus calls us to love sacrificially. But how do you know when you're making a healthy sacrifice for someone you love—and when you're slowly losing yourself in the process? The distinction matters, especially when you've learned to equate being a good Christian with always putting yourself last. We explore: What Jesus' own sense of belovedness teaches us about sacrificial love The subtle difference between healthy sacrifice and over-functioning Why denying yourself doesn't mean abandoning yourself How to discern what love is actually asking of you in a relationship Go Deeper: For more on loving others without losing yourself, read The Best of You Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Proverbs 29:25 Have you ever said yes when you wanted to say no—or agreed with someone just to avoid conflict? People-pleasing can become an automatic response, especially when you've learned that keeping others happy is the safest way to maintain connection. But you can begin to change this pattern without losing your compassion for others. We explore: Why people-pleasing can feel almost impossible to stop What fawning reveals about your fear of disappointing others How to find security beyond someone else's approval Small ways to practice saying no without guilt Go Deeper: For more on how to recognize protective patterns and retrain your soul to find security in God's love, explore The Secure Soul and The Secure Soul Companion Guide Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: 1 John 4:1–2 How do you become wise about who to trust without growing suspicious of everyone? In a world full of charismatic leaders, confident voices, and competing spiritual claims, John's instruction to "test the spirits" offers a powerful way to practice discernment while keeping your heart open. In today's episode, we explore: What John really means by "testing the spirits" Why charisma and confidence can cloud our judgment How to recognize the difference between spiritual authority and genuine character Three practical ways to grow in discernment without becoming cynical Go Deeper: Episode 231: How to Know Who You Can Trust: The Difference Between Charisma, Character, and Real Change Episode 190: Self-Brain Surgery, Overcoming Trauma, and the Courage to Change How You Think with Dr. Lee Warren Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you know you can trust someone? In a world where charisma, confidence, and even vulnerability can be carefully performed, knowing who we can trust feels more important than ever. In this powerful conversation, Dr. Alison sits down with longtime friend, therapist, and author Dr. Chuck DeGroat to explore what real character looks like, why genuine change is slower than we want it to be, and how to discern the difference between surface-level transformation and lasting integrity. Together, they unpack this incredibly important question of discerning when someone is trustworthy, as well as how to become people of character ourselves. In this episode, you’ll learn: * Why charisma and vulnerability don’t always signal trustworthy character. * How to recognize manipulation disguised as emotional maturity or spiritual wisdom. * What genuine character change looks like and how long it takes * How to balance compassion for others with healthy boundaries and accountability. About Dr. Chuck DeGroat: Dr. Chuck DeGroat is a professor, licensed therapist, author, and ordained minister specializing in pastoral health, spiritual abuse, religious trauma, and emotional and spiritual well-being. He serves as Professor of Counseling and Christian Spirituality and Founding Executive Director of the Clinical Mental Health Counseling Program at Western Theological Seminary. He is also the founder of The Soul Care Collaborative and a faculty member at the Soul Care Institute. With decades of experience in pastoral ministry, leadership development, and trauma-informed care, Dr. DeGroat helps individuals and church leaders navigate emotional and spiritual challenges toward greater wholeness and flourishing. More Resources: Get Dr. Chuck DeGroat's new book: Who You're Becoming: The Slow and Courageous Work of Cultivating Character in a Narcissistic Age Find more information about Dr. Chuck DeGroat here. Get exclusive access to the first 2 chapters of Dr. Alison’s newest book, ⁠The Secure Soul⁠.  Connect further with ⁠@dralisoncook⁠ on Instagram 📖 Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode⁠ here⁠. Don't forget to browse this week's sponsors, who make it possible for us to bring you these resources for free! Quince - How you dress affects your mood and you can trust that Quince has you covered in every day sustainable wardrobe staples. Go to ⁠⁠Quince.com/bestofyou⁠⁠ for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! *Some of the links above are Amazon affiliate links. If you choose to purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Proverbs 27:9, 17 Finding good friends as an adult can be surprisingly difficult. Friendships change, life circumstances shift, and loneliness can creep in even when we're surrounded by people. Proverbs offers a beautiful picture of friendship that combines genuine enjoyment with the kind of honesty and wisdom that helps us grow. In today's episode, we explore: Two surprising qualities of a good friendship Why the people you spend time with shape who you become What psychology reveals about how long it takes to build a close friendship How to recognize and cultivate friendships that can weather disagreements and disappointments Go Deeper: Episode 58: How to Find Friends Who Bring Out the Best of You with Curt Thompson Episode 61: Reconnecting with Old Friends Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Matthew 16:21–23 What happens when someone who genuinely loves you questions a decision you know you need to make? Even Jesus faced resistance from a close friend who wanted to protect him. His response reveals something surprising about the relationship between selflessness, inner strength, and staying true to your calling. In today's episode, we explore: Why even people who love us can give misguided advice What Jesus reveals about the strength behind true selflessness How to build confidence in your own voice, one small step at a time How to stay connected to someone without letting their fears guide your decisions Go Deeper: For more on developing a strong sense of self, explore The Best of You Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's Scripture: Psalm 31:14–20 Have you ever been in a painful situation where others are urging you to take action, but something deep within you is telling you to wait? There's a difference between avoiding a hard decision and discerning that the time to act hasn't yet come. Psalm 31 offers a powerful picture of what it means to face difficult circumstances honestly while entrusting yourself to God's timing. In today's episode, we explore: How to discern the difference between passive avoidance and the spiritual wisdom of waiting on God What David's prayer, "My times are in your hands," teaches us about trusting God amid injustice, uncertainty, and suffering What it means to suffer wisely How to recognize when the time has come to speak up, advocate for yourself or someone you love, or take the next courageous step Go Deeper: For more on discerning when to fight for change, when to leave, and when to suffer wisely, explore I Shouldn't Feel This Way Connect with Dr. Alison on Instagram: @dralisoncook Join 80,000+ Soul Menders in Dr. Alison’s free email community for ongoing reflection and support. While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices