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Welcome back! This episode is on different aspects of safety - which is a timely topic right now, especially for those living in the United States presently. Elle discusses many themes including proactive steps we can take to make ourselves feel and be more safe. Elle is now a fully licensed LMFT in California (#159064) and is accepting clients currently. She accepts several insurance plans and also has spots open for cash-pay. If you would like to learn more about being a client, please visit her website: estherloewen.com. To share a comment or idea for the program, or to join Elle's support groups, please email [email protected] Thank you so much for your emails and well-wishes. I'm sorry for the break and hoping to get back to more regular recordings. All the best!

In this installment of Transgender Woman Talking, Elle hosts a conversation with Mary Almy and Cheryl Shaver about a documentary they created together. Cheryl is a filmmaker and director who spent time with Mary and her loved ones to explore and present an intimate portrait of her world. In the episode, Elle talks with the two of the importance of story-telling, the poignancy and power of Mary's experiences, and what we expect yet ahead. The film "Mary: Her Journey from Pain to Purpose" is currently in the film-festival pre-release phase and so has limited availability publicly. However, interested folks can reach out through instagram or Cheryl's website (below) to potentially host a screening or talk more about how to share the project. In some ways, the film resonates with Will Ferrell's work on "Will and Harper" a Netflix documentary about the celebrity's relationship with an old friend and colleague who transitioned later in life. Watch a Trailer for Mary's film here.Cheryl Shaver's website SLA Video can be found here; her company's facebook page is here.Mary and Cheryl's Instagram for the project.Film Will and Harper⁠⁠Elle's BlueSky Account⁠⁠ As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy with her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes or Sacred Wounds support group, please email ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠.

Elle checks back in with her thoughts about the current political discourse regarding trans people, including the many cruel and stigmatizing executive orders the new president of the United States signed during the first few weeks in office. Elle discusses some of the practical things she's doing to take care of herself, and how she believes we will all survive these times. Included in the episode are references to the following links and resources: Elle's BlueSky AccountThe Parable of the Sower &The Parable of the Talents by Octavia ButlerBalatro Game (*caution* you may not be able to stop)Amy Beaver'sTik-Tok EncouragementPride Plans Estate PlanningThe LGBTQ Center of the Desert in Palm Springs -Scott Hines Behavioral Health ClinicSacred Wounds Support Group (Zoom) for LGBTQ People who have experienced religious hurt. Every Wednesday morning at 10am PST.Email for access. As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠. The group meets ever 2nd and 4th Tuesday evening of the month on Zoom at 6:30pm PST.

I am still here. And so are you. This episode is the first following the American election of 2024, which was upsetting and disappointing for many of us. In it, Elle talks about Transgender Day of Remembrance, and provides a recording of a speech she gave at a in person gathering in her area. In it, she also reflects on surviving, thriving, and still showing up even during difficult times. Blessed are the Trans Kids, Esther's poem based on The Beatitudes Therapy, a poem by Nayyira Waheed A brief history of Transgender Day of Remembrance As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠

In this belated episode, Elle talks about a book published just this past summer on the history of women's running. Better Faster Farther, by Maggie Mertens, explores the myths that have restricted women athletes access to competitive sports (namely running) and that continue to threaten them to this day. Read or learn more about it here and here. Included in this conversation are reflections on trans athletes competing with women, as well as intersex athletes who sometimes do not discovery they are intersex until being tested as part of Olympic protocols. Some of the resources referenced in the show include: Erin in the Morning's reporting on Blaire Fleming, the volleyball player from San Jose State University who became the center of a hate campaign in October 2024. Bobbi Gibb, Marathoner Fierce Femmes Support Group As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠

This week's episode is a recording of a sermon/lecture that Elle gave back in May at Paradox Church in Redlands (see their website here). In the speech, Elle reflects on some of the unique ways that queer people are often harmed by especially high control religions. As a spiritual person and one who practiced rigid religion for many years, Elle has experiences with both being negatively impacted by religious trauma and also being a perpetrator as a Christian leader. Watch a video version of the sermon with Elle's visuals here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZpnn09daAY&t=14s Learn more about Kevin Garcia's work on religious harm, including his book "Bad Theology Kills" here: https://www.thekevingarcia.com/ To learn more about inviting Elle to come speak for your event or organization, please visit her website: https://estherloewen.com/speaking As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠⁠[email protected]⁠

In this edition of the show, Elle talks about the idea of the 24/7 news cycle, and how it creates predictable waves of outrage throughout our culture, and into our lives. She reflects on the common denominators of the cycle as described by author Mark Manson (from the Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck) in a ⁠block post⁠, and explores how these dynamics are uniquely experienced by trans and gender expansive people. Elle talks about her experiences of feeling pressure to "have a take" when the news cycle hits, and anxiety about how that take or lack of a take may be received. Some of the resources discussed in the show include: ⁠Better, Faster, Farther,⁠ by Maggie Mertens The work of ⁠Erin in the Morning⁠ ⁠Church Redwood Trees Scandal⁠ As always, to learn more about Elle and her work, or to explore the possibility of accessing psychotherapy from her, please visit her website at ⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠. For constructive feedback on the show, to ask questions, or to get access to the Fierce Femmes support group, please email ⁠[email protected]⁠

Dr. Jill Hingston, LMFT is a psychotherapist, fierce ally of the trans community, and brilliant queer cisgender woman who currently serves as the Director of Behavioral Health Services at the LGBTQ Center of the Desert in Palm Springs. During this episode, Elle talks with Jill about her extensive experience working especially with transgender youth. Reach out to Jill via contact info on The Center website. Contact Elle via email at [email protected] to learn more about the support group Fierce Femmes, and to get involved. If you are in need of psychotherapy services and would like to talk with Elle about what therapy would look like with her, learn more and contact her on her website: (www.estherloewen.com).

In this episode, Elle addresses the elephant in the room and plans for the show going forward. She furthermore reflects on the many kinds of breaks we all take through our lives and transitions. This latest installment touches on themes of anxiety, trust, mindfulness practices, vacations, privilege and class, and of course transgender identities. . To join the Fierce Femmes support group on the 2nd & 4th Tuesdays of every month at 6:30pm PST, please email Elle at [email protected]. To offer questions, constructive feedback, and other connections to the show, use the same email :)

After an unplanned hiatus, Elle talks about the learned nature of gender, how gender is socialized, and the validity of gender and sex being changed and performed. She talks about the reasons we might choose to do gender in different ways, including safety, joy, and internal personality alignment. Some of the resources and additional materials referenced and recommended from this episode include: Abigail Thorn from Philosophy Tube on Judith Butler's ⁠Philosophy (ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANCE) Dylan Mulvaney - Days of Girlhood Lizzo - "Like a Girl" Judith Butler and Gender Trouble. Another piece by Judy in a recent NYT article. F*****g Harrison Butker and his Sexist Speech Reach out to Elle at [email protected] with questions, constructive feedback, and questions. To learn about what psychotherapy with Elle might look like, please visit her website: https://estherloewen.com/ and click "Therapy".

In this week's installment, Elle talks about a recent tattoo she got commemorating her graduation from therapy school. In addition, she reflects on some of the history and conversation in and around body modifications, including the perjorative accusation of "mutilation". Elle references her tattoo artist, Adrianne Marcella, as well as the work that she got done on her forearm for her transition ceremony in 2022 (read more here). Please take a minute to send Elle an email at [email protected] to ask questions, make constructive suggestions, or name possible guests. To inquire about psychotherapy with Elle, please fill out a request form on her website at: www.estherloewen.com

On this episode, Elle brings back her book report format, exploring her reactions and thoughts about Taylor Jenkins Reid's masterful novel, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Among the themes included in this monologue are: reflections on allyship, the difficulty of being in the closet, how names and labels for the queer experience have changed over the years, the ways in which the dangers and societal expectations have shifted in even the last 70 years, the importance of feminism, and the fabulous and informative podcast "Bad Gays". Many thanks for tuning in to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to [email protected]. If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

In this episode of the program, Elle talks about some of her understanding of religious trauma or spiritual abuse. As a former pastor and lifetime member of the Seventh-day Adventist Christian denomination, she resonates very strongly with many of the experiences folks identifying as victims of religious trauma describe. In the program, Elle also reflects on some of her understanding of trauma in general from a therapist's perspective, as well as some of the symptoms that people who have been hurt by religion go through. Some of the resources mentioned on the episode this week include: Sacred Wounds religious trauma support group (Elle leads this weekly with one of her colleagues on Wednesday mornings at 10am on Zoom) - email for the link Bessel Van der Kolk - "The Body Keeps the Score" Gabor Mate - "The Myth of Normal" EMDR Trauma Therapy Marcos Torres and the Hunger Podcast on religious trauma / take the quiz here As always, thank you so much for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to [email protected] If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

Nex Benedict was a 16 year old trans child who used he/him/they/them pronouns and lived in Oklahoma outside of Tulsa. Early in February, they were bullied to death in the girls bathroom at school. Before passing, video and text messages were captured from Nex reflecting on the experience of the fight that took his life and the years of harassment and bullying that led up to it. Many folks have been struck by his unjust and untimely passing - including bad actors and bigots like the head of Libs of TikTok who was recently appointed to an Oklahoma position overseeing library books. For most queer folks, however, Nex's killing evokes painful memories about our own traumas -- and the deaths of our queer siblings over the years including especially Matthew Shepherd, Brandon Teena, Brianna Ghey, the Q Nightclub Shooting, The Pulse, O'shae Sibley, and on and on and on. In this episode, Elle shares her feelings that come up after hearing of Nex's death -- as well as short recordings taken from the Vigil in her town. She finishes the episode with an invitation to take constructive action to push back against the hate. Some resources shared and mentioned on today's podcast include: Therapy with Elle "A Warped Version of the Bible Killed NEx Benedict" by Serene Jones The work of Kevin Garcia, "Bad Theology Kills" The work of Jeffrey Marsh As always, thank you so much for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to [email protected] If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠⁠ and click on "Therapy".

Elle talks about some recent experiences she's had with haters, and how she chose to respond. She reflects on some of the principles she's used in the past (and present) for shaping reactions, offering a matrix of priorities that may arrive in a variety of priorities depending on the situation. The themes and topics addressed in this episode include Nex Benedict's death, verbal and physical threats, intimidation, personal safety, blocking and deleting on social media, attending to self-respect, getting our needs met, fighting for justice, ghosting, reconciliation, forgiveness, intimacy, and leaving good reviews :) Thank you once again for listening to the program, for your constructive feedback, and encouragement. Continue to send it to [email protected] If you'd like to become one of Elle's clients in therapy, and you are in the state of California, please reach out to her on her website: ⁠www.estherloewen.com⁠ and click on "Therapy".