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If you've ever thought "If I'm hard enough on myself, maybe I'll finally change," then this episode is for you. The short answer is no. Shame does not help you lose weight. In fact, being hard on yourself can make overeating worse. You eat more than you planned. Maybe it's chips on the couch at 9 PM, or one piece of office birthday cake that turns into the whole afternoon. Then the mean voice starts. "What is wrong with me? I have zero control around food." And part of you believes that if the lecture is harsh enough, it will finally stick. I believed that for years. In this episode, I share one of the hardest nights of my life. We were stationed on Guam, I was lonely and overwhelmed, and I was eating my way through it. I woke up at 2:30 in the morning full of shame, sure that if I made myself feel awful enough, I would finally change. I didn't. What I learned instead changed everything. When your brain feels stressed or threatened, it looks for safety. And when the threat is your own inner critic, food is often the safety it finds. That's why shame can keep the emotional eating cycle going. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why shame and self-criticism make overeating worse, not better Why your inner critic thinks she's helping you What a scab and a seed can teach you about lasting change Why being kind to yourself won't make you lazy, and what one study found How to stop the "the day is already ruined" spiral Key Takeaway Being mean to yourself is not the same as being disciplined. Shame tells your brain you're in danger, and a brain in danger reaches for comfort, which is often food. Self-compassion makes it safe to try again. Sustainable weight loss doesn't come from being harder on yourself. It comes from giving yourself the conditions to grow. Listen If You've Ever Thought... "What is wrong with me?" "Why do I overeat when I feel bad about myself?" "If I'm nice to myself, I'll just get lazy." "Well, the day is already shot. Might as well." "Why can't I stop being so hard on myself?" Frequently Asked Questions Does being hard on yourself help you lose weight? No. Self-criticism makes your brain feel threatened, and a threatened brain looks for comfort. For many women, that comfort is food. Why do I overeat when I feel ashamed? Shame feels like danger to your brain. Food feels like safety. So you reach for it, even when you're not hungry. Will being kind to myself make me lazy? No. In one study, students who were kind to themselves after failing a hard test studied longer for the retest. Kindness makes it safe to try again.   Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

If you've ever stepped on the scale, seen it start to move, but then thought "Wait, this is it? Why don't I feel different yet?" then this episode is for you. The short answer: losing weight can change your body, but it can't make you feel like enough. That's because enough was never at the end of the road. It's been inside you the whole time. You worked so hard to get there. You waited for the relief, the moment you could finally relax. Maybe it lasted a day. Then the voice came back: "Maybe five more pounds would be safer." The finish line moved again. In this episode, I share the story of a client of mine who spent decades looking for a corner in a round room. First at work, as a woman in an industry run by men. Then with food and the scale. I tell you about the family trip that changed everything for her, and the morning she looked in the mirror and saw something she'd been missing her whole life. I also share my own story of hunting for enough. Spoiler: it includes getting fired. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why hitting your goal weight often doesn't feel like arriving Why you can feel like you're 14 again around your family What a round room has to do with diets and weight loss How a mirror in a cardboard box helped a man's brain let go of pain he'd felt for ten years Why feeling enough is something you find, not something you earn Key Takeaway Diets promise that once you get there, you'll be done. You'll feel happy, worthy, and free. But there is no finish line where enough is waiting. Sustainable weight loss and real peace with food start when you stop hustling for your worth and start seeing what's already true. You don't have to earn enough. You already are. Listen If You've Ever Thought... "When will I finally feel good enough?" "Why do I still feel the same after losing weight?" "My family still treats me like the old me." "I thought maintenance would feel easier than this." "Why can't I ever just relax around food?" Frequently Asked Questions Why don't I feel happy after reaching my goal weight? Many women believe a certain number will finally make them feel worthy. When they get there, that feeling doesn't show up, because it was never tied to the scale. Feeling enough comes from the inside. Does maintenance ever end? No, and that's not bad news. Maintenance is less like a place you arrive and more like a relationship you live in, like riding a bike. You keep pedaling, and the ride itself is the point. Why do I fall back into old habits around my family? The people who've known you longest often hold an old picture of you. Without meaning to, they invite you back into that old role. You don't have to blame them or fight them. You also don't have to play that role anymore.   Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

If you've ever thought "Don't get excited, I'm just going to blow it again," then this episode is for you. You have a good week. The scale finally moves. And instead of feeling happy, you feel scared. Part of you is already waiting for the fall. I get it. When you've tried so many times, "I always blow it" can feel like a fact. But what if it's not? What if it's a belief you decided on a long time ago, and you get to decide again? In this episode, I share two coaching stories. One client was heading into a family trip, sure she would never lose weight on vacation. Another had just lost three pounds and was already afraid she'd mess it up. I walk you through the simple tool that helped them both, and why it works with your brain instead of against it. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why "I always blow it" is a thought, not a fact How your body tells you when a thought isn't true Why affirmations can backfire, and what to use instead How one small question on a note card can change a whole weekend Why the women who keep going are the ones who don't hide Key Takeaway You don't have to force yourself to believe something new. Your brain loves to argue with statements, but it loves a puzzle even more. When you ask a better question, your brain goes looking for proof. And the proof that you can do this has been there all along. Listen If You've Ever Thought... "I'm never going to lose weight on vacation." "Why can't I get this right?" "Here we go again." "I wish these thoughts would just go away." "I'm a failure at weight loss." Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

If you've ever thought "How do I stop binging an what do I do after a binge?" then this episode is for you. The short answer is that your eating makes sense, even when it feels out of control. Overeating and binge eating are signals, like a light on your car's dashboard. They point to something going on underneath, such as shame, restriction, stress, or feelings you don't have another way to handle yet. Maybe you eat half a box of cereal standing in the kitchen. Maybe you eat in the car so nobody sees. Then you buy a new box, hide the wrappers, and promise yourself that tomorrow will be different. My guest today, Jane Pilger, knows that feeling well. Jane is a Master Certified Coach and the host of the Binge Eating Breakthrough Podcast. She binged in secret for decades, starting in her first semester of college. Today she talks about binge eating with zero shame, and she helps women see their eating through a whole new lens. Jane shares the eight reasons we eat when we don't want to. Even if you don't call yourself a binge eater, this applies to any time you've eaten in a way you wish you could do over. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why shame and judgment make it harder to stop overeating How the way you talk to yourself can be a form of restriction, even when you eat everything Why food is often how we get away from ourselves The one question that works better than "What's wrong with me?" Why new habits don't stick until the deeper reasons get attention Why on-again, off-again dieting is a sign you're focused on the outside Why Jane says there's no finish line, and why that's good news Key Takeaway Your eating is a light on the dashboard. It's telling you something is going on underneath. Shame keeps the hood closed. Curiosity and compassion open it. When you ask "How does this make sense?" instead of "What's wrong with me?" you start finding real answers, and emotional eating starts to lose its grip. Listen If You've Ever Thought... "Why do I binge eat when I'm not even hungry?" "Nobody can know how much I eat." "I know what to do. I just can't do it." "Why do I keep going on and off my diet?" "Will I ever stop thinking about food?" Frequently Asked Questions Why do I eat when I don't want to? Unwanted eating usually has a reason underneath it. Jane names eight, including shame, restriction, a stressed nervous system, and using food to cope with emotions. Your eating makes sense, even when it feels out of control. Does shame make binge eating worse? Yes. Shame tells you something is wrong with you. When we're hard on ourselves, we want to get away from ourselves, and food is often how we learned to do that. Will I ever stop binge eating for good? Jane says there's no finish line, and that's okay. She still binges on rare occasions. What changed is how she treats herself afterward, and that makes it much easier to move on.   Connect with Jane Pilger janepilger.com Cultivate: janepilger.com/cultivate  The Binge Eating Breakthrough Podcast The Food Freedom Mini Series: Jane’s book The Binge Eating Breakthrough   Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

If you’ve ever wondered “Is this ever gonna get easier?” then this episode is for you.  You had a really good couple of weeks. The food noise got quiet. You were sleeping well, stopping when you'd had enough, and thinking, "Maybe I finally have this." Then one night it all came creeping back. Maybe it was a bag of chocolate on the couch after dinner. And the next morning, the big question showed up: "What happened? I was doing so well. Is it ever going to get better?" In this episode, I share a coaching call with a client who was in that exact spot. We use one simple picture, riding a bike, to see what's really going on. Because weight loss has flat stretches and it has hills. A hill doesn't mean you did something wrong. It just means you hit a hill. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why a hard night after a good stretch can feel like failure, even when it isn't The "second arrow" we shoot at ourselves, and why it makes eating harder Why a good week can feel almost scarier than a hard one Simple ways to make a hill feel smaller What the "I might as well wait until January" voice is really doing A study showing that a hill looks less steep when a friend is with you Key Takeaway Easy weeks and hard weeks are just part of the road. They say nothing about who you are or whether this is working. You don't need a perfect, flat road to lose weight. You just keep making your everyday choices, like drinking your water, stopping at enough, and going to bed. That's what keeps you moving, and it's normal life, not a punishment. Listen If You've Ever Thought… "I was doing so good. Why did I do that?" "Two good weeks, and now it's all for nothing." "Is the food noise ever going to go away?" "This feels too easy. What am I missing?" "The holidays are coming. I might as well start over in January." "Why does my husband lose weight so fast?" Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

Do you feel like your worth depends on how much you get done in a day? Meals, errands, work projects, other people's problems. Every morning the score resets to zero, and you have to earn your place all over again. Then you finally sit down to rest, and guilt comes crashing in. Shouldn't I be doing something? In this episode, I share a coaching conversation with a client of mine who was always on the go. She kept eating at night, tired and resentful as she watched her husband relax on the couch. What we found underneath that resentment surprised us both. It has a lot to do with emotional eating, worth, and the deep need to be needed. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why rest can bring up so much guilt How resentment often points to what you secretly want for yourself What the Karpman Drama Triangle is, and how it shows up in weight loss Why being a good listener can matter more than being a good fixer How to find your worth beyond being needed Key Takeaway Your worth was never on your to-do list. It was there before you checked off a single thing. Like the sun on a cloudy day, it keeps shining whether anyone notices or not. When you let yourself rest without earning it first, food no longer has to be your only break at the end of a long day. Listen If You've Ever Thought: "I can't sit down until everything is done." "Why does he get to relax and I don't?" "If they don't need me anymore, what am I for?" "I'll rest after I finish this one last thing." "Why do I always end up eating at night?" Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

If you keep asking who am I to think I can do this and want to finally believe you're allowed to try anyway, then this episode is for you.   Have you ever felt like you're the only one struggling with weight loss while everyone else has it figured out? Maybe you've watched a friend or coworker have success with weight loss medication and thought, maybe I should try that too. Or maybe that sneaky little thought creeps in, if I really wanted this, I would be doing better by now. That voice has a name. It is called imposter syndrome, and it does not just show up in your career or your goals. It shows up in weight loss too. In this episode, I dig into why self-doubt and comparison show up so much on this path, why waiting to feel ready is a trap, and how to stop comparison from stealing your progress. Because self-doubt does not mean you are failing. It means you are human. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why imposter syndrome shows up in weight loss, not just your career or goals The difference between feeling doubt and letting doubt run the show Why comparison quietly fuels self-doubt, and how to catch yourself doing it How your brain uses food for safety when it feels threatened A simple way to notice a doubtful thought and take action anyway Key Takeaway Self-doubt is not proof that you are failing. It is proof that you are human. You do not have to feel confident to take action. You just have to take the next small step, doubt and all. Listen If You've Ever Thought… "If I really wanted this, I would be doing better by now." "Why is this so easy for everyone else?" "I should already have this figured out." "What if I can't keep the weight off?" Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show. Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

The Secret to Never Dieting Again Do you ever feel like the second you stop dieting, all bets are off? Maybe it's a vacation. Maybe you got sick. Maybe it's just a weekend. And suddenly you're back to old habits, wondering why you can't just eat like a normal person. If that sounds familiar, I want you to know you are not alone. This episode came from a real conversation I had with a client, one where I mapped out a simple three-step process on the spot. And I knew right away it needed to be an episode. Here's the thing. The secret to weight loss that actually lasts is not another diet. It is not a quick fix. It is slowly changing what normal eating looks like for you, one small step at a time. In this episode, I walk you through why diets keep failing you, and I give you the exact three-step framework I use with clients to build a new normal that sticks, without feeling deprived. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why diets are built to fail you, even the ones that work at first The three-step process you can use to change any habit, for good Why tiny changes work better than big, drastic ones How to stop telling yourself you need to "get back on track" Real examples you can use today, from fast food to late night snacking Key Takeaway Lasting change does not come from a diet. It comes from slowly building a new normal, one small level up at a time. When you stop trying to overhaul everything overnight, your brain stops fighting you, and the change actually sticks. Listen If You've Ever Thought… "Why does healthy eating always feel like punishment?" "I did so good, then I went on vacation and lost it all." "I need to get back on track." "Will I ever just feel like a normal eater?" Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

If you're exhausted from being all in for two weeks and then all out for two more and want to find some steady middle ground, then this episode is for you.   Why You Keep Starting Over Do you ever feel like you're always restarting your weight loss? One week you're all in, doing everything right, and a few weeks later you're worn out and back to old habits. The weight creeps back and it feels like you're right back at zero. If that sounds familiar, this episode is for you. We're talking about why weight loss brings out all-or-nothing thinking, even in women who are flexible and easygoing in every other part of their life. The second a cookie shows up, it can feel like it's broccoli or bust. We're also talking about something a lot of my clients say. "I just want to be done thinking about this." I get why you'd want that. But that mindset can actually keep you stuck. There's a better way to think about it, one that feels a lot more freeing. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why all-or-nothing thinking shows up so much around food and weight loss The real reason you feel like you have to start over after one off day Why wanting to be "done" with weight loss can work against you A mindset shift that helps you stay steady through busy or hard seasons Simple ways to track your wins that actually stick Key Takeaway One off day does not erase your progress. You are not starting over, you are picking up where you left off. Real change happens in the messy weeks, not just the perfect ones. Listen If You've Ever Thought… "I blew it, might as well start over Monday." "I just want to be done thinking about food." "Why is this the one area where I can't just relax?" "I feel like I'm back at zero again." Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

"I want to go for my goal and lose weight but... "This isn't the right season." "I should focus on my health first." "Once things calm down at work." In this episode, I'm talking about the four sneaky ways fear shows up and tries to pass itself off as good judgment. I share the story of a thermostat quietly running in the background of your brain, keeping you exactly as small as it thinks is safe. And I walk through the same four step process my own coach used with me when I got nervous before speaking to a crowd of five hundred people. This one goes deep on why staying stuck can feel so much safer than growing, even when growing is what you actually want. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why your brain hands you a "reasonable" excuse instead of just admitting you're scared The four fear patterns behind almost every stuck moment (thank you, Gay Hendricks) A simple four step process for moving through fear instead of around it Why trying to force your feelings to settle usually makes things worse What it means to stop handing fear the pen on your own story Key Takeaway Fear rarely shows up announcing itself. It shows up sounding like common sense. But underneath almost every "not right now," there's an old, understandable reason your brain thinks staying small keeps you safe. You don't have to argue with that voice or wait for it to disappear. You just have to stop handing it the pen every time it asks for it. Listen If You've Ever Thought... "I'll start when things settle down." "Maybe this just isn't the right time for me." "Why do I always talk myself out of things I actually want?" "I know what to do, so why can't I just do it?" Quote credits: Quote from A Return to Love — Marianne Williamson (1992)   Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

If you’ve ever thought "I'll do that when I've lost the weight." or "Who am I to think my voice matters?" then this episode is for YOU.  This is episode #200! Happy birthday Confident Body podcast!  When I started this podcast, I almost didn't. I wanted a co-host because I didn't think I could carry a whole show by myself. I was scared I'd run out of things to say. (Guess that wasn’t an issue.) Even though I was scared, I started messy, and I kept going. Two hundred episodes later, I want to talk about something that goes way beyond the scale. Because somewhere in all the tracking and the trying and the starting over, a lot of us forget to ask the bigger question. What is all this weight loss actually FOR? This episode is about the parts of your life you've put on hold while you wait to feel ready. The trip. The class. The creative thing. The relationship. The version of you that's been waiting in the wings for "someday." What You'll Learn in This Episode Why weight loss was always meant to be a doorway, not a waiting room How to spot the ways you might be putting your real life on hold without even noticing Why your gifts are not yours to sit on What it means to let your "music" out, even when you don't feel ready Who you might impact when show up imperfectly Key Takeaway You don't have to finish losing weight before you start living. Your gifts, your voice, your particular way of showing up in the world, are needed right now, not on the other side of some number on a scale. Ready isn't a feeling that shows up. It's a decision you get to make today. Listen If You've Ever Thought… "I'll do that when I've lost the weight." "Who am I to think my voice matters?" "I'm doing all the right things but I still feel stuck." "I keep waiting to feel ready." Music and quote credits: "Be the Light" — Reesh Seely, 2025 (Carolina Sky Records) Quote from A Return to Love — Marianne Williamson (1992)   Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

Why You Feel Like a Stranger in Your Own Body and The Five-Minute Tool That Calms Rage and Helps You Actually Sleep Have you been waking up lately and feeling a little off? You are getting everything done, but somewhere in there you lost the version of you who felt steady and clear and easy to be around. In this episode, I sit down with Jessica Long, a certified trauma informed breathwork facilitator and certified menopause coaching specialist. We talk about why so much of how you feel comes from your body first, before your thoughts ever get involved. That is a different starting point than most of us were taught when it comes to fixing stress, fog, or feeling stuck. Jessica explains why so many of us breathe in a way that quietly tells our nervous system something is wrong, even when we are just sitting at our desk or scrolling our phone. We also talk about a skill called interoception. That is your ability to feel what is happening inside your own body. So many women lose touch with this skill without ever realizing it, and it is part of why you might feel disconnected from yourself. This conversation is for any woman who has thought, "I just don't feel like myself anymore," and wants to understand why, and what to do about it. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why your body sends safety signals to your brain, not the other way around What the vagus nerve is and why it matters for feeling calm Why shallow chest breathing can signal danger to your nervous system without you noticing What interoception is, and why losing touch with your body can leave you feeling foggy and disconnected A few small ways to build a breathwork habit, even if meditation never stuck for you before How breathwork before bed can help you fall asleep faster How a calmer nervous system gives you more room to pause before a craving takes over Key Takeaway Feeling calm and feeling like yourself again does not start in your head. It starts in your body. When you give your nervous system a clear signal of safety, something as simple as your breath can do this, everything else gets a little easier. That includes the food noise in your head and how often you find yourself thinking about food. You do not need an hour or a perfect routine. You need a few minutes and a little bit of practice. Listen If You've Ever Thought... "I just don't feel like myself anymore." "I know what to do, so why can't I make myself do it?" "I've tried meditation a hundred times and it never sticks." "Why do I want to eat the second I finally sit down at night?" "I'm too in my head to relax."   Learn More About Jessica Long Jessica’s FREE Sleep Breathwork Session  https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep Next-Level You Waitlist: A 3-month breathwork program for the woman who’s done white-knuckling through life  https://www.belongwellness.com/work-with-me Jessica’s website  https://www.belongwellness.com/ Instagram @heyjessicalong  https://www.instagram.com/heyjessicalong Midlife Advice Podcast  https://www.belongwellness.com/podcast   Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

Have you ever looked at an old picture of yourself and thought, wow, I looked amazing? And then you remembered that back then, you didn't feel good about yourself at all. You were on a diet then too. You were sure something needed to change. That gap between how you looked and how you felt is what this episode is about. So many of us have hit a goal weight, or gotten close to one, and found out the peace we were promised never showed up. We just kept going, chasing the same feeling, sure that the next ten pounds would finally deliver it. This episode comes from a real conversation I had with a client who found an old journal from when she was in her twenties. She weighed less than she does now. And she felt exactly as not enough as she does today. Same feeling, decades apart. We get into why that happens, and what it actually takes to feel different this time, not just look different. What you'll learn in this episode: Why chasing a goal you've never actually defined keeps your brain searching forever What your heart already knows before your head can catch up A simple daily practice that helps you notice you're already enough, no proof required Why "worthy" and "enough" were never things you were supposed to find outside yourself Key takeaway: You can hit a goal weight and still feel exactly the way you did before you started. That's not a willpower problem. It's a sign that the target you were chasing was never clearly defined in the first place. The steadiness you're looking for isn't waiting for you somewhere out there. It's something you already carry, and this episode is about learning to trust it instead of keep searching for it. Listen if you've ever thought: "I finally lost the weight and I still don't feel any different." "Why do I still feel the same way I did years ago?" "I don't even know what would make me feel like enough." "I keep chasing a feeling I can't quite name."   Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss   Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

Why personality tests can explain a lot, but they are not your identity. Have you ever known exactly what you were supposed to do and done the opposite thing anyway? You know the plan. You know you should rest instead of reaching for a snack. And somehow you end up in the pantry anyway. In this episode, I sit down with life coach Kelly Tibbitts for a podcast swap. Kelly is an expert in the Enneagram and human design, and we talk about why knowing what to do and actually doing it are two completely different jobs. Kelly used something as simple as a grocery cart in a parking lot to explain why two people can look at the same task and have a completely different, deeply held opinion about the right way to handle it. Once you hear it, you'll probably recognize yourself or someone you love immediately. We also get into people pleasing, perfectionism, and a simple tool for feeling a feeling instead of eating over it. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why knowing what to do and doing it can feel like two different jobs How people pleasing quietly shows up around food A simple three step tool for feeling a feeling instead of eating it Why perfectionism is really about safety, not about getting things right How guilt-free rest can be a real weight loss tool Key Takeaway Your patterns make sense. The way you're wired explains why you reach for food, why you push through instead of resting, and why rest can feel impossible to give yourself. None of that means something is wrong with you. Once you understand your own wiring, you can trade judgment for grace. And underneath the wiring, underneath the patterns, the part of you that already knows who she is has been there the whole time. Listen If You've Ever Thought… "Why do I know what to do and still not do it?" "I feel guilty every time I actually rest." "Why does she handle this so differently than I do?" "Am I a perfectionist, or is something else going on?"   Learn More About Kelly Tibbitts Website https://kellytibbitts.com Live a Vibrant Life Podcast:  https://coachkellytibbitts.buzzsprout.com/ Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/kelly_tibbitts/ Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle

Who Are You Really Hiding From?  Have you ever eaten something completely alone? In your car, in a closet, with the door locked, just so nobody would see. And then made sure there was no evidence left behind. If that's you, I want you to know you are so not alone. In this episode, I'm joined by Amber Abila, a binge eating coach and host of the Become a Confident Eater podcast. Amber spent years in her own cycle of restriction and bingeing before she found her way out, and now she helps women understand what their body has actually been trying to tell them this whole time. We talk about why certain foods feel impossible to resist, why even "eating a little healthier" can backfire, and the real reason so many of us hide what we eat. This isn't about willpower. It's about understanding your own body again. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why your brain treats some cravings like an emergency How restriction can quietly set off a binge, even when it doesn't look extreme Why food companies can make a flavor without the nutrition that flavor used to promise The real reason so many women eat in secret A few small ways to start trusting your hunger again Key Takeaway Binge eating is not a character flaw and it is not a willpower problem. It's a habit your brain built to respond to restriction and to a food system that learned how to imitate nutrition without delivering it. The secrecy that comes with it doesn't protect you from judgment. It just means you're the only one judging. The work isn't punishing your body into behaving. It's learning to trust it again. Listen If You've Ever Thought… "Why can't I just be normal around food?" "I'm so tired of thinking about food all the time." "I ate that completely alone so no one would know." "Something must be wrong with me." "I know what to do, so why can't I just do it?"   Learn More About Amber Abila Get instant access to Amber’s guided audio to “Stop a Binge Before it Starts” ⁠HERE⁠! https://www.theconfidenteater.org/urge-guest Podcast:  https://www.theconfidenteater.org/podcast Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/theconfidenteater_/ Youtube:  https://www.youtube.com/@amberabila Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/amber.abila.77/ Free Support Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/532434625387487/?mibextid=c7yyfP Want More? If this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to subscribe to The Confident Body Podcast. Every week we talk about the mental and emotional side of weight loss, the part that diets never cover. We cover things like sustainable weight loss, emotional eating, self-trust around food, and how to break free from diet rules that have never worked long term. Because the goal isn't just to lose the weight. It's to become someone who knows how to keep it off and feel good while doing it. Leave a review if this episode helped you. It only takes thirty seconds and it helps other women find the show.   Get the book my new book LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss Check out my new Substack page! You’ll get bonus articles, inspiration, and wisdom. Plus some extra goodies I’ve got rolled up my sleeve. Check it out at: https://substack.com/@coachlizziemerritt   PS: Ever had that moment when you just WANT it?  Your brain doesn’t care if you’re hungry. It just tastes SO good and you just want it.  If that’s you, then download the guide I JUST WANT IT. IT TASTES SO GOOD at: confidentbody.coach/wantit   Also, check out my first book: You Are A Miracle