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Have you ever felt like you’re in trouble, even as an adult? Like you’re not doing enough for other people, someone is disappointed in you, or there’s always something you need to make right? This is the experience that coach Kristen Carder explores in her book You’re Not in Trouble: The ADHD Guide to Building Healthy, Connected Relationships. In this conversation, you’ll hear why relationships can feel so difficult when you have ADHD or grew up in an environment where you were taught to put everyone else’s needs above your own. Kristen shares practical frameworks to help you understand your relationships, recognize what’s working and what isn’t, and finally have the tools to be honest about what you want from your relationships. How long have you been putting off the hard conversation? Join Sara live for one hour for her free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Here’s what you’ll uncover in this episode: The ways that You’re Not in Trouble will help you map out your relationshipsWhy other people’s reactions can have such a strong impact on your sense of security in relationshipsHow to recognize the difference between mutual, asymmetrical, and parasitic relationshipsHow relationship tiers can help you decide how much time, energy, and vulnerability to invest in different peopleWhy it’s never too late to renegotiate a relationship and ask for what you need Find Kristen here: ihaveadhd.com ihaveadhd.com/book ihaveadhd.com/podcast www.instagram.com/i.have.adhd.podcast www.facebook.com/ihaveadhdpodcast Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Staying in the box you were taught to fit into can feel easier than speaking up and risking conflict, but what happens when silence means letting down the people you love? In this episode, you’ll hear from Mandy Giles, founder and CEO of Parents of Trans Youth, about how parenting transgender young adults helped her find her voice and become an advocate for the world she wants her kids to live in. Her story shows what can happen when standing up for what matters becomes more important than keeping everyone else happy. How long have you been putting off the hard conversation? Join Sara live for one hour for her free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Here’s what you’ll uncover in this episode: Why talking about your transgender child with other people can be one of the biggest hurdles, even when you’re fully acceptingHow advocating for your children can help you discover a courage you didn’t know you hadHow to talk about LGBTQ+ topics in a way that is helpful and supportiveWhy stepping outside the boxes you were taught to fit into can help you live more authentically and make room for others to do the sameThe resources available to parents of transgender youth and how to find support Find Mandy here: bit.ly/allytoadvocate www.parentsoftransyouth.com www.instagram.com/parentsoftransyouth Mandy Giles (she/her) is the parent of two transgender young adults and the founder and CEO of Parents of Trans Youth, a social impact business that provides learning, support, and community for caregivers of transgender, nonbinary, and gender-diverse kids and young adults. She has been heavily involved in advocacy work since 2021 and has testified before the Texas Legislature dozens of times. Mandy is the 2026 Pride Houston Ally Grand Marshal, recipient of the Equality Texas 2025 Business Champion Award, and former president of PFLAG Houston. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

The holiday season is approaching fast, and alongside the excitement, you may already be feeling the weight of all the expectations that come with it. Between family traditions, travel plans, and trying to make everyone happy, you can end up with very little energy to enjoy the things you were looking forward to. If you’re ready to do things differently this year, today you’ll get three simple sentences you can use to help you navigate difficult conversations with loved ones when speaking up feels hard. This episode was originally released closer to the holidays, but it is worth revisiting now so you can keep these sentences in your back pocket as you start making plans and navigating expectations. How long have you been putting off the hard conversation? Join Sara live for one hour for her free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Here’s what you’ll uncover in this episode: Why changing family traditions or plans can bring up anxiety, guilt, and fear of disappointing peopleWhy you feel the need to prove or justify what you want before asking for itHow to acknowledge someone else’s perspective without giving up your own wants and needsThe conversational tug of war that happens when someone disagrees with your choicesWhy someone else’s disappointment doesn’t have to come at the expense of what you want Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Overthinking can cost you more than time. It can keep you from taking chances and becoming the person who can have what you want. In this episode, you’ll hear a conversation with Dr. Priyanka Venugopal about what it took to move from thinking “Probably not me” to “Why not me?” and pursue a dream without having any evidence that it would work. This mindset shift helped her lose over 60 pounds without counting calories and prepared her to take the stage for her TEDx Talk. It’s not easy, but when you learn to make peace with the idea of failure and be proud of yourself just for trying, so much becomes possible. How long have you been putting off the hard conversation? Join Sara live for one hour for her free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Here’s what you’ll uncover in this episode: How to break the habit of treating disappointment as proof that you did something wrongWhy desire will start to outweigh the fear surrounding something when you really want itHow to think about rejection as information instead of turning it into self-criticismHow overthinking can turn something you care about into a performanceThe benefit of seeking support if you’re used to figuring things out on your own Find Priyanka here: https://youtu.be/-p6KtUizbvs?si=gw38DixCjlL9TyED https://www.instagram.com/dr.priyankavenugopal/ https://priyankavenugopal.com/ https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-burn-stress-lose-weight-podcast/id1618073362 Dr. Priyanka Venugopal is an OB-GYN physician, podcaster, TEDx speaker, and entrepreneur. She’s also a coffee-lover and self-proclaimed expert overthinker. After losing 60 pounds while juggling call shifts and two young kids, she discovered the real problem for smart women was never a lack of discipline... it was the time and energy lost to overthinking. Today she helps overachieving professional women reach their next goal in health, home, or career — and get back the 10+ hours a week overthinking quietly steals. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

How much time and energy do you spend defending choices you’ve already trusted yourself to make? Whether it’s your career, parenting, relationships, or something else entirely, it’s exhausting to keep explaining yourself after you’ve already done the work of deciding. Good girl conditioning can make you feel obligated to defend yourself when someone questions your choices, instead of recognizing what’s actually happening in the conversation. In this episode, you’ll learn the difference between a request, a demand, and a boundary so you can get more clear about what you will and won’t participate in and build the skills to talk about it. How long have you been putting off the hard conversation? Join Sara live for one hour for her free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Here’s what you’ll uncover in this episode: The real definition of a boundary and why it often gets confused with something elseHow to tell the difference between a request and a boundaryA question to ask before you make a request or set a boundaryHow a demand can be disguised as a boundaryWhy following through is the essential step in setting a boundary Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

How much time do you spend overanalyzing the texts you send to a potential partner or giving guys on dating apps a chance because they seem to have the traits you’ve been taught to look for? If you’re tired of continuing conversations because you feel like you should, giving someone the benefit of the doubt when the evidence in front of you says otherwise, or second-guessing whether you’re being too picky, this episode will help you recognize how good girl conditioning can shape the way you date. Today’s guest, Dr. Jennie Young, creator of the Burned Haystack Dating Method, helps you see the patterns in your dating life more clearly so you can trust your judgment and make choices that create more peace and safety. Want to take this work deeper? Join Sara live for one hour for her free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Here’s what you’ll uncover in this episode: Why “good” is a more abstract and gendered term than you may realizeHow good girl conditioning can make it harder to see the meaning behind someone’s words and behaviorHow being trained to see “potential” in men can affect the choices you make in datingWhy treating politeness as protective can actually work against youWhy you need to give yourself permission to walk away when the evidence tells you something isn’t right Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Jennie here: burnedhaystack.substack.com/p/burned-haystack-dating-method-quick www.facebook.com/groups/9116647515019601 Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What do you say when you don’t want to go? Your friends are making plans, everyone is excited, and you’re worried that if you say “no” this time, they’ll stop inviting you altogether. So you say “yes” even though what they’re planning isn’t really your thing, and you spend the rest of the week dreading it. You may tell yourself you don’t have a good enough reason to say no, but the cost of going along with everyone else is more than one night you don’t enjoy. This is the final episode of a series called “What Do You Say When…” These short episodes will each give you one concrete thing you can say when you’re stuck in a difficult moment. If you want more, join Sara live for one hour this week for a free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What do you say when you’re unhappy with how it turned out? You get your nails done or have new bathroom tile put in, and the work isn’t what you expected. Still, you hesitate to say anything because you don’t want to be viewed as picky, difficult, or demanding. You’ve learned that being agreeable is safer than asking for what you really want, so you might say “No, no, it’s fine” and live with the disappointment instead. But the cost of avoiding that uncomfortable moment is more than paying for something you don’t like. This is the sixth episode of a series called “What Do You Say When…” These short episodes will each give you one concrete thing you can say when you’re stuck in a difficult moment. If you want more, join Sara live for one hour this week for a free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What do you say when your kid wants the money before he does the work? You know the lawn hasn’t been mowed, but when he comes asking for $40, it feels easier to say “yes” than to deal with his disappointment or an argument. You want to have a good relationship with your kid, and every “no” can feel like it costs you closeness. But when you keep bending the rules to avoid that discomfort, the real cost is a relationship where you’re constantly reminding or doing things yourself instead of building the trust and mutual respect you really want. This is the fifth episode of a series called “What Do You Say When…” These short episodes will each give you one concrete thing you can say when you’re stuck in a difficult moment. If you want more, join Sara live for one hour this week for a free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What do you say when you’re done being the family peacemaker? This pattern has probably been going on for years. You may tell yourself that someone has to do it or that it’s just easier when you handle things. You’re worried your family will fall apart if you don’t mediate conversations between your siblings or your parents, but constantly managing everyone else’s emotions is costing you time and energy. This is the fourth episode of a series called “What Do You Say When…” Over the next week, these short episodes will each give you one concrete thing you can say when you’re stuck in a difficult moment. If you want more, join Sara live for one hour this week for a free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What do you do when you’re the one who always reaches out? If you’re the one who always sends the text, makes the plans, and keeps the friendship moving, you may eventually start to feel tired or resentful, wondering why the effort isn’t more balanced. You can tell yourself it’s okay because she’s busy or you’re just better at planning, but the issue goes deeper than fairness. You’re ultimately wondering whether the friendship means as much to her as it does to you, and that uncertainty and loneliness you feel come at a cost. This is the third episode of a series called “What Do You Say When…” Over the next week, these short episodes will each give you one concrete thing you can say when you’re stuck in a difficult moment. If you want more, join Sara live for one hour this week for a free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What do you say when you have to tell a client something she doesn’t want to hear? You know something isn’t lining up during a presentation, but you hesitate to point it out because you don’t want to disappoint her or be the person who ruins the meeting. You might tell yourself it’s not your responsibility or soften what you really need to say, but protecting yourself from her reaction costs more than you may realize: your professional integrity and the confidence that comes from speaking up. This is the second episode of a series called “What Do You Say When…” Over the next week, these short episodes will each give you one concrete thing you can say when you’re stuck in a difficult moment. If you want more, join Sara live for one hour this week for a free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What do you say when he’s on his phone during the show? Maybe you tell yourself it’s not a big deal, so you don’t say anything. There’s no argument and no chance of being hurt by what he says when you bring it up. But your silence is still costing you something: connection. This is the first episode of a series called “What Do You Say When…” Over the next week, these short episodes will each give you one concrete thing you can say when you’re stuck in a difficult moment. If you want more, join Sara live for one hour this week for a free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Register for SPEAK UP: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Is it normal for you to spend several hours a day thinking about a conversation you’re avoiding? Three hours each day adds up to 1,095 hours a year, which means that’s more than 45 days of your life dedicated to thinking about something you haven’t even said out loud yet. If you’re stressed, exhausted, and overwhelmed, you may be spending far more time and energy on difficult conversations than you realize by doing the good girl math: the internal cost-benefit analysis of whether speaking up is worth the risk. You’re rehearsing what you’ll say, looking for the right words and the right time, and trying to predict how the other person will respond before you ever open your mouth. Today, you’ll learn why all of that thinking feels productive and what’s actually happening underneath it so you can get those hours back and have the freedom and confidence that comes from knowing you can have any conversation you need to. How long have you been putting off the hard conversation? Join Sara live for one hour on September 9th at 12PM PT or September 15th at 2PM PT for her free workshop, SPEAK UP. There’s no replay, so bring the conversation you keep avoiding. You’ll learn the Three Speak Up Skills and figure out what’s keeping you stuck. Here’s what you’ll uncover in this episode: Why you can speak up when someone else needs you to but struggle when you’re the one who has something to gainWhat starts running through your head the moment something matters to you and someone else might not want to hear itTwo compelling reasons why you may be doing good girl math whenever you have something to sayWhy all the researching, rehearsing, and gathering evidence still can’t tell you how another person will respondHow the younger part of you that learned to calculate the risk of being rejected still impacts your thinking Register for the FREE workshop: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Most of us know when we need to have a hard conversation. It’s more difficult to notice the ones we’re quietly putting off because we think there’s always more time. There are two different kinds of hard conversations, and understanding which kind you’re dealing with can make a difference. A deadline conversation has urgency built in: avoiding it can lead to unwanted consequences. A drift conversation is about something important, but it's easy to postpone because nothing terrible happens today if you don’t say what you need to say. In this episode, I’m breaking down both types of conversations, why drift conversations can be especially easy to avoid, and how to start participating more intentionally in the relationships that matter to you. Because whether there’s a deadline or not, the same skills can help you start the conversation, stay in it, and handle whatever happens next. Here’s what I cover: Why deadline conversations can actually be easier to act on when time and external consequences make avoiding them harderThe reason drift conversations are so easy to put off and why your relationship continues to change even when you decide to “deal with it later”How the thoughts and stories you keep to yourself can become part of the drift in a relationshipWhy recognizing that you have a finite amount of time in every season of a relationship can help you decide what’s worth sayingHow to participate in creating the relationships you want without needing to control how the other person responds Reserve your seat for Sara’s next workshop: sarafisk.coach/voice Find Sara here: sarafisk.coach pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations instagram.com/sarafiskcoach facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333