Advertise on podcast: Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Get the Ultimate Guide to Raising Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/membership   Samantha and Lauren discuss what to do when you mess up as a parent, emphasizing that apologizing is not weakness but modeling accountability, empathy, and healthy relationships. They address parental guilt, especially after a child’s neurodivergence diagnosis, noting “you didn’t know what you didn’t know,” and encourage apologizing without staying stuck in shame. They outline steps to repair: acknowledge what happened without excuses or blaming the child, regulate before reconnecting, apologize without conditions or pressure for forgiveness, and tailor apologies to a child’s communication needs. They stress that apologies must be followed by behavior change through identifying triggers, building and practicing a regulation plan, and involving the child in problem-solving when appropriate. Examples include morning routine yelling, responding during meltdowns, and shifting from punishment to accommodations.   00:00 Apologize or Not00:26 Why Parents Avoid Apologies04:13 Guilt After Diagnosis05:53 Perfection Isn’t Required08:33 Step 1 Acknowledge12:43 Step 2 No Conditions17:22 Step 3 Change Behavior21:29 Real Life Scenarios24:18 Grace Growth and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Get the Ultimate Guide to Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Babble with Brooke: https://www.babblewithbrooke.com/   Samantha and Lauren share strategies for when a child can complete tasks one day but struggles the next. They encourage parents to track patterns (sleep, routine changes, sensory environment, prior demands) rather than judge isolated moments, reduce the size of the first step to support task initiation, and “externalize” executive function with tools like visual schedules, checklists, timers, first-then boards, labeled bins, consistent landing spots, body doubling, and offering two acceptable choices. Samantha and Lauren emphasize regulation before compliance through nervous system support and co-regulation, and recommend flexible supports that can vary day to day without implying regression. They also discuss planning for predictable low-capacity times, when to seek professional help for sudden or intense changes, and classroom supports. Babble is a free weekly newsletter created for women in the thick of real life. Every week, we sort through the noise and deliver the recommendations, discoveries, tips, and fun finds worth your time.   00:00 Why Kids Seem Inconsistent00:37 Track Patterns Like a Detective02:42 Shrink the First Step04:42 Externalize Executive Function08:43 Regulation Before Compliance11:09 Flexible Support Not Regression16:11 Plan for Low Capacity Times18:54 When to Seek Extra Help22:08 Key Takeaway and Weekly Challenge24:10 Babble Newsletter and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Download the Ultimate Guide to Raising Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Samantha and Lauren discuss why children may struggle with tasks they seemed able to do the day before (like getting dressed, brushing teeth, or doing homework) and how parents can respond without assuming laziness or defiance. They emphasize a mindset shift: yesterday’s success doesn’t guarantee today’s ability, and parents should get “curious, not furious” by looking for what helped previously and what’s harder now. The episode explains executive functioning and how multi-step tasks involve transitions, planning, organization, impulse control, memory, and sensory tolerance, which can be affected by ADHD, autism, stress, sleep, sensory processing, and environmental factors like rushing or noise. 00:00 Why Kids Seem Inconsistent02:40 Curious Not Furious04:03 Executive Function Basics04:54 Getting Dressed Breakdown08:37 Hidden Support You Give11:41 ADHD Inconsistency Research13:12 Video Games Versus Homework18:04 Sleep Stress Sensory Environment22:52 Cant Versus Wont23:49 Practical Support Ideas24:42 Part Two And Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Get the Ultimate Guide to Raising Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Samantha and Lauren discuss Samantha’s son’s years-long struggle with chronic, debilitating pain (legs, back, migraines) and how a pain clinic evaluation led to a new explanation: sensory processing disorder with heightened interoception. After extensive normal test results, a multidisciplinary team suggested his internal body-signal sense may be “turned up,” intensifying pain perception. Samantha and Lauren define interoception (internal sensations like hunger, bathroom needs, heart rate, temperature, pain, and emotions) using occupational therapist Kelly Mahler’s framework and note that interoception differences can be muted, intense, or distorted, affecting interpretation of sensations and emotions. The episode emphasizes validation, shifting from “why does he hurt?” to “what support does his nervous system need?”, and introduces Mahler’s “body, emotion, action” approach, encouraging parents to become “body detectives” with neutral body check-ins and curiosity rather than telling kids to “calm down.” 00:00 Welcome and Topic Setup00:15 Years of Chronic Pain Search00:46 Pain Clinic Evaluation02:27 Unexpected Diagnosis Insight04:32 Interoception Explained06:24 When Signals Feel Too Loud09:23 Muted vs Intense Awareness11:56 Validation and Support Mindset15:32 Body Emotion Action Framework20:38 Becoming Body Detectives22:06 Key Takeaways and Next Steps23:44 Resources and Closing Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Get the Free Ultimate Guide to Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/membership Connect with Susan: https://www.LoveBridgecoaching.com     Samantha and Lauren interview Susan Minor, a certified relationship coach trained in the Laura Doyle method, about rebuilding connection in marriage, especially for parents under the stress of raising neurodivergent children. Susan shares how, after nearly 30 years of feeling isolated and disconnected, she used the Laura Doyle skills privately and saw her relationship transform within months, later deepening the work with coaching. She addresses common misunderstandings of The Empowered Wife, emphasizing it is not about shrinking or doing more, but about being heard and creating space for a partner to step up. The discussion covers “triage” after diagnosis, resentment, disengagement, “tools not rules,” gratitude and receiving, self-care, choosing connection over perfect logistics, and using conversation prompts to move beyond schedule-only talk.   00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro01:28 Susan Marriage Turning Point04:03 Empowered Wife Misconceptions06:08 Neurodivergent Parenting Strain11:16 Six Tools for Connection14:28 Gratitude and Receiving18:02 Beyond Logistics Talk24:31 Conversation Starters Ideas26:21 Where to Find Susan28:10 Fun and Final Takeaways28:54 Host Highlights and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Get the Free Ultimate Guide to Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/membership Connect with Dalisse:Instagram: https://instagram.com/lovingpiecesbooks LinkedIn at LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/sequeirosdalisse   Samantha and Lauren interview Dalisse, an autistic author and mom of two autistic boys, living in Barcelona, Spain, who wrote the five-book Loving Pieces series. Dalisse shares her family’s journey since her oldest son's diagnosis at 17 months, discussing early challenges such as meltdowns, guilt, grief, and uncertainty, and advises parents to give themselves time, take things one day at a time, and not treat bleak predictions as fixed outcomes. Dalisse explains receiving her own autism diagnosis after recognizing similarities with her children, emphasizes being honest without romanticizing autism, and describes balancing differing sensory needs within the family through open communication and support from her husband and grandparents.   00:00 Welcome And Guest Intro01:16 Life In Barcelona02:11 Why She Wrote The Books05:20 Advice After Diagnosis10:52 Her Late Autism Diagnosis13:34 Explaining Autism To Kids15:44 Sensory Needs At Home20:17 Finding Your Tribe22:17 Resources And Where To Find Her23:35 Fun Hobbies And Wrap Up24:50 Host Highlights And Book Recap27:45 Final Goodbye And Next Steps   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Get the Ultimate Guide to Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/membership   Samantha and Lauren discuss out-of-the-box ways to teach neurodivergent kids kitchen skills. They share practical strategies to include kids without overwhelm by breaking cooking into clear steps, assigning specific tasks, and using visuals, play kitchens, and practice activities like pouring between measuring cups or “mud pie” measuring. They cover progressive knife and cutting practice with kid-safe tools, softer foods, and Play-Doh, while emphasizing safety routines. The episode also highlights sensory considerations (smells, textures, loud appliances, heat/steam) and executive-function supports (picture recipes, checklists, timers, color-coded tools), encourages experimentation when safe, and suggests building independence in stages and finding ways to say yes.   00:00 Podcast Welcome01:42 Kitchen Skills Topic01:58 Cold Oven Practice04:02 Why Cooking Matters05:43 Visual Steps and Roles08:12 Play Kitchen Practice10:01 Kid Safe Cutting Skills13:37 Sensory Friendly Cooking16:58 Food Reactions and Gloves18:29 Executive Function Supports21:25 Experiment and Independence24:42 Find a Way to Yes26:06 Resources and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Get the Ultimate Guide to Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/   Samantha and Lauren discuss Samantha’s weekend camping trip with extended family and how a recent change in her son’s ADHD medication affected his behavior. Her son had previously thrived on stimulant medication, describing a “quiet” brain and better focus, but after switching meds due to appetite concerns, he became unusually emotional, restless, and reactive which led to conflicts, safety concerns, and relatives criticizing Samantha’s parenting strategies and implying he needed more discipline. Once Samantha realized the new medication needed a higher dose and adjusted it, he returned to baseline and listened better, though others attributed it to discipline. Samantha and Lauren emphasize advocating for neurodivergent kids, using teachable moments to educate family, balancing compassion with expectations, and offering positive feedback amid frequent negative comments.   00:00 Welcome and Setup00:14 ADHD Meds Success Story02:24 Switching Meds Camping Meltdown04:33 Family Judgment and Discipline09:15 Safety and Fixing the Dose10:30 Counting Consequences Reset12:06 Advocating and Educating Family14:01 Teachable Moments Sensory Needs16:54 Positive Feedback and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Get the Guide to Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/   Samantha and Lauren discuss sensory-friendly hygiene routines for neurodivergent kids, emphasizing that hygiene is a health skill, not a test of compliance, and the goal is a safe, sustainable routine that supports autonomy and sensory needs. They review how sensory factors (noise, bright lights, smells, water pressure/temperature, textures) and executive-function demands can make tasks like showering, hair washing, deodorant, toothbrushing, menstrual care, and shaving difficult, and they encourage parents to “get curious, not furious.” Using a notice–name–modify framework, they suggest practical adaptations such as adjusting the bathroom environment, using handheld showerheads, keeping preferred towels nearby, offering shortened routines on hard days, trying different toothpaste/toothbrush options, and using visual schedules and timers. They also cover respectful prompting, privacy and dignity during puberty-related care, when to involve professionals, and the takeaway that sensory distress is information, not defiance.   00:00 Welcome and Topic Setup00:29 Hygiene Is a Health Skill02:01 Sensory Barriers in Bathrooms04:21 Executive Function and Toothbrushing06:21 Get Curious Not Furious08:36 Notice Name Modify Framework10:41 Sensory Friendly Shower Setup12:36 Shower Modifications and Short Routines18:19 Haircare Without the Meltdowns20:06 Skincare and Deodorant Choices23:28 Toothbrushing Adaptations26:02 Prompting Toward Independence28:44 Puberty Privacy and Dignity30:43 Routines for Hard Days32:32 Define Done and Use Supports35:08 When to Call a Professional37:08 Key Takeaways and Next Steps38:53 Resources and Closing Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Get the Ultimate Guide to Parenting Your Neurodivergent Child: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/   Samantha and Lauren discuss how to support autistic boys through puberty. They emphasize that physical puberty changes are generally typical, but sensory sensitivities, uncertainty, social rules, and indirect language can make the experience harder, so autistic youth need complete, factual information about bodies, relationships, boundaries, and safety through many short, ongoing conversations. They recommend explicitly teaching what to expect (odor, acne, hair, genital growth, voice changes, erections, etc.), building visual and predictable supports (timelines, social stories, checklists), and giving choice in how information is delivered, including AAC vocabulary. They myth-bust that education encourages sexual behavior and stress concrete rules for privacy, consent, trusted-adult disclosure, and risks of nude images, plus when to consult a clinician.   00:00 Puberty Kickoff 01:50 Why This Matters 04:51 What Puberty Changes 06:49 Sensory And Routine Shifts 08:28 Myth Busting Puberty 11:00 Consent And Safety Basics 13:58 Teach Clearly And Visually 19:57 Privacy Rules And Sexting 26:38 Mental Health Check In 27:55 This Week Action Steps 30:07 When To See A Clinician 31:05 Resources And Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren discuss strategies for effectively parenting children with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA). They emphasize the importance of collaboration over direct demands to help children feel more in control and safe, which mitigates reactive behaviors. They explain how giving children choices and involving them in decision-making can prevent the activation of their parasympathetic nervous system, which is linked to anxiety and defensive behaviors. Practical examples like offering options instead of direct commands are given and the importance of flexibility and patience in parenting, particularly for neurodivergent families is discussed. Samantha and Lauren also highlight the significance of co-regulation and maintaining a calm demeanor to support a child's sense of autonomy and safety. A PDA cheat sheet with useful scripts and strategies is available for listeners.   00:00 Introduction 00:39 Understanding Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) 03:00 Collaborative Parenting Strategies 06:08 Practical Examples and Scripts 09:37 Managing Parental Expectations and Flexibility 21:30 Maintaining a Regulated Nervous System 24:30 Conclusion and Resources   Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership Get the PDA Cheat Sheet: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/pda-cheat-sheet   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Samantha and Lauren discuss non-traditional, child-led approaches to therapy for kids diagnosed with autism, ADHD, and related needs, contrasting them with more compliance-based, clinical models and emphasizing that therapy should match the child. They highlight alternatives that can complement traditional services like OT, speech, and PT, including equine-assisted services, animal-assisted interventions, aquatic/swim therapy (including water safety), creative arts therapies (music, art, dance/movement, drama) provided by credentialed professionals, nature-based/outdoor therapy, and technology/gaming/special-interest-based approaches like Minecraft and GarageBand. They stress these therapies are not about reducing autistic traits but improving quality of life and participation, and they outline how to evaluate legitimacy by asking about evidence, risks, credentials, meaningful progress measurement, and goals, while warning against “cure,” “detox,” guarantees, and testimonial-only expensive programs.   00:00 Welcome and Topic Setup 00:22 Traditional Therapy Norms 02:10 Why Child-Led Matters 05:12 Equine Assisted Therapy 07:45 Animal Assisted Options 09:52 Aquatic Swim Therapy 13:19 Creative Arts Therapies 20:33 Nature-Based Outdoor Therapy 23:32 Tech Gaming Special Interests 27:44 Spotting Legit Therapies 29:18 Red Flags and Research 31:51 Final Takeaways and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/membership   Samantha and Lauren explain the child evaluation process for concerns like ADHD, autism, anxiety, and learning differences. They normalize parents’ nervousness about labels and judgment, emphasizing that evaluations don’t change a child but provide baseline understanding, shared language, and access to resources. They describe signs that may warrant discussion with a primary care provider, encourage trusting instincts, and outline steps: talk to a pediatrician or school staff, get referrals (developmental pediatrician, psychologist, neuropsychologist, psychiatrist, specialty clinics), and prepare for long waitlists. They explain typical multi-visit evaluations, forms to complete, what to bring, observation and standardized testing, parent involvement, and the feedback report with diagnoses, strengths, challenges, and recommendations, noting that support is needed even without a diagnosis.   00:00 Welcome and Listener Feedback 00:54 Why Evaluations Feel Scary 02:40 When to Seek an Evaluation 07:55 First Steps and Referrals 10:12 Insurance Costs and Waitlists 13:10 Services Without Diagnosis 15:16 What the Evaluation Looks Like 16:28 Forms and What to Bring 20:09 Testing Observation and Parent Role 26:35 Results Recommendations Next Steps 30:20 Wrap Up and Get Help Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Connect with Samantha:https://everybrainisdifferent.com/   Connect with Katey: Website: https://yourdifferentability.com/ Book: https://yourdifferentability.com/book Book Preview (Katey made this free for this podcast's listeners!): https://yourdifferentability.com/welcome Instagram: https://instagram.com/kateyfortun Personal Website: https://kateyfortun.com/   Samantha and Lauren welcome back disability advocate and dyslexic speaker Katey Fortun to discuss her newly published book, "Embracing Your Different Ability," available in standard print, dyslexic-friendly print, and audiobook, along with her "Different Ability Podcast." Katey shares that she was inspired to write the book after feeling prompted on a walk in late 2023, committed in early 2024 to doing “one new thing,” and self-published through Amazon with support from a book-coaching team, ultimately releasing it on March 26, 2024—the same date she signed up to begin the process. Written initially for her eight-year-old self, the book aims to help kids feel seen and understood while also supporting parents, guardians, and teachers, including chapters from Katie’s mother to show both child and parent perspectives. They discuss distinguishing “won’t” vs. “can’t” by defaulting to “can’t” and investigating, the hidden struggles of kids who appear “fine” at school, the trauma of forced reading aloud, and how diagnosis can be validating and unlock resources; Katey also shares a free “welcome package” with sample chapters and resources at her website.   00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro 01:33 Why She Wrote It 04:45 Who the Book Is For 09:21 Won Versus Cant 16:25 School Trauma and Diagnosis 21:43 Dyslexia Strengths and Success 25:24 Closing Questions and Hope 27:16 Where to Find the Book 29:34 Final Advice and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/membership Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/   Samantha and Lauren discuss the third step after a child is diagnosed with autism: building a support system. They recap the first two steps—learning about autism by getting curious about your own child and connecting with autistic adults and other parents, and applying early for resources like Medicaid and therapy waitlists. They validate how overwhelming ongoing therapies and frequent specialist appointments can be, emphasizing that parenting isn’t meant to be done alone and that some family or friends may not provide the support you expect, making it okay to set boundaries or create distance. They outline professional supports (pediatricians, therapists, mental health providers) and personal supports (spouses, friends, online communities), encourage learning from parents further along while avoiding comparison, and note research linking parental support to lower stress and improved outcomes.   00:00 Welcome and Recap 00:57 Why Support Matters 01:43 Overwhelm and Appointments 04:08 Finding Your Village 04:56 When Family Isn’t Supportive 07:49 Professional Support Team 10:01 Emotional Support and Community 11:29 Learn From Others Avoid Comparison 14:50 Support Groups and Action Step 16:18 Three Takeaways and Closing   Connect with Samantha Foote! Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent