Advertise on podcast: By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care

Episode Summary Host Micaela Tracy brings together four panelists for an honest conversation about their experiences with foster care: a young man who grew up in foster care, a CASA volunteer, a longtime foster parent, and a parent with lived experience. Recorded live at a VOICES community panel, the group talks about building trust, walking into the courtroom, and why it matters to ask where someone is coming from. In This Episode 00:00 Cold open 00:15 Welcome and why this panel became an episode 01:00 Meet the panel 05:00 What people misunderstand about parents 09:00 The CASA volunteer who never gave up 12:00 Building trust with kids and their parents 16:00 Seeing every side of a family 21:00 Walking into the courtroom, from every seat 36:00 What each panelist wishes the community understood 45:00 What they want the judge to know 51:30 Knowing when to ask for support 57:00 Closing thoughts About Our Panelists Bryon Elsberry experienced foster care, had a CASA volunteer from his teens until he aged out, and now works as a youth advocate. Brad Teboe is a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) volunteer in Maricopa County. Shelly Utzke has cared for children living in foster care for about 25 years and is a director at Christian Family Care, a foster care licensing agency. Kristy Dupree is a parent with lived experience who supports parents with DCS cases through the Family Involvement Center. Resources and Links Christian Family Care · cfcare.org Family Involvement Center · familyinvolvementcenter.org Voices for CASA Children · voicesforcasachildren.org National CASA/GAL Association for Children · nationalcasagal.org About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

Episode Summary Kristin Orphan is a foster and adoptive mom and co-founder of Finally Home, and she knows how isolating it can feel to say yes to a child. She talks with host Micaela Tracy about why being safe and willing is only the starting point, and how anyone can help a family stay in their yes, beginning with the benefit of the doubt. In This Episode 00:00 Cold open 00:15 Welcome and today's guest 01:10 Kristin's family and how foster care found them 04:00 How their own story led to Finally Home 08:45 "You're amazing," and why it can feel isolating 09:55 Helping families stay in their yes 11:50 Practical help, from meals to laundry 15:45 Safe and willing does not mean equipped 20:35 Signs a family needs more support 22:40 Start with the benefit of the doubt 27:00 How anyone can come alongside a family 30:15 Where to find Finally Home, and closing thoughts About Our Guest Kristin Orphan, MS, CFLE, is a foster and adoptive mom and co-founder of Finally Home, which has provided education, mentoring, and family support for foster, adoptive, and kinship families since 2008. Resources and Links Finally Home · finallyhome.net Voices for CASA Children · voicesforcasachildren.org National CASA/GAL Association for Children · nationalcasagal.org About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

Episode Summary Joan Ulsher is a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) volunteer who experienced foster care as a child, and the advocate she is today is the one she needed back then. In eight years she has served 36 children, often choosing the most demanding cases. On this episode, she talks with host Micaela Tracy about sibling visits, the silence that counts as a clue, and why the person who keeps showing up is the one a child remembers. Her ask is simple: if this is not your calling, find the one that is. In This Episode 00:20 Welcome and season framing 01:10 What a CASA volunteer is, in plain language 02:35 Her husband's dare, and how Joan found CASA 05:25 Becoming the advocate she did not have 06:15 What the role actually involves, month to month 08:40 Seeing what everyone else missed 10:15 Why judges welcome a volunteer's input 11:30 The other children in the home 13:35 The first visit, and why coming back matters most 17:00 How trust actually gets built 21:35 "I was once you," and what stays private 22:20 Misplaced Childhood, and separating her story from theirs 24:35 The one child who reached her 25:40 If this is not your calling, here is what else you can do 27:25 Why kids in foster care are everyone's business 30:20 The neighbor who watched out for her 31:40 For advocates who are running on empty 34:55 Dressers made with love 37:20 Show up for these children About Our Guest Joan Ulsher is a CASA volunteer and CASA Education Advocate with Child Advocates San Antonio, where she chairs the Legislative Advocacy Team, and the author of the memoir Misplaced Childhood: A True Story of Resiliency and Child Advocacy. She served 20 years in the Army before turning to advocacy, and she has served 36 children in eight years as a volunteer. Resources and Links Joan Ulsher · joanulsher.com Misplaced Childhood: A True Story of Resiliency and Child Advocacy Dresser art on Pinterest · @JoanAkitas Voices for CASA Children · voicesforcasachildren.org National CASA/GAL Association for Children · nationalcasagal.org About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

Episode Summary When a woman she had just met told Turquoise Skye Devereaux, "I can tell, because you eat like you went to boarding school," she heard how a history she never lived still shaped the way she moves through a day. Turquoise is Salish and Blackfeet, a social worker by training, and the founder of Indigenous Skye, where she has spent more than eight years helping schools, agencies, tribes, and child welfare systems create culturally safe spaces. She talks with host Micaela Tracy about what cultural safety actually means, the Indian Child Welfare Act in plain English, and the questions that help a child feel known instead of tested. Most of the adults in the orbit of a Native child are not Indigenous, and her message is for every one of them: you only know what you know, being present matters more than being perfect, and for a child, culture and identity are not extra. They are part of safety itself. In This Episode 00:00 Cold open 00:20 Welcome and season framing 01:50 Meet Turquoise: Salish and Blackfeet, and how Indigenous Skye began 03:10 What cultural safety actually means, and where the term comes from 05:00 Learning from the people you serve instead of assuming you know 08:10 Making it normal to not know: the zipper response 08:50 Asking about a child without putting the work of teaching on them 10:45 Native students are here to get an education, not to educate 12:30 The gap between what adults were taught and what a child needs 14:50 ICWA in plain English: why the law exists 17:40 The Indian Adoption Project, AIM, and 1978 19:45 ICWA in practice, and why it is hard on the people carrying it out 22:20 Well-meaning assumptions that land as harm 24:40 "Maybe I'm not Native enough": what a child internalizes 26:10 Better questions to ask about home and belonging 28:45 Intergenerational resilience and what else gets passed down 29:50 Seven generations in one body: epigenetics and trauma 31:45 "You eat like you went to boarding school": the story behind the cold open 35:30 Where to start learning on your own 39:30 Being present is enough: showing up where children already are 42:45 The pedagogy of discomfort, and why growth requires it 45:20 One thing to do differently tomorrow 46:15 Reflection and close About Our Guest Turquoise Skye Devereaux, MSW, is Salish and Blackfeet and the founder and lead consultant of Indigenous Skye, LLC, where she has spent more than eight years helping schools, agencies, tribes, and child welfare systems create culturally safe spaces for Indigenous youth and families. She is completing a PhD focused on identity in Indigenous communities in Arizona and Montana. Resources and Links Indigenous Skye · indigenousskye.com · @indigenousskye on Instagram National Indian Child Welfare Association (NICWA) · nicwa.org Voices for CASA Children · voicesforcasachildren.org National CASA/GAL Association for Children · nationalcasagal.org About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

Episode Summary When Jamole Callahan was fifteen, he realized the adults were meeting every few months to decide his future, and he was never in the room. He spent six years in foster care across nine homes and aged out at eighteen into the kind of instability that pushes so many young people straight into homelessness. Twenty years later, the rooms have flipped: lawmakers now invite him in, and he has helped shape the federal housing policy that gives young people leaving care a longer runway of support. He talks with host Micaela Tracy about the meetings he fought his way into, the foster-agency worker who finally leveled with him, the science teacher he now calls dad, and why housing is the foundation everything else depends on. His message reaches past the system to anyone listening: throw the pebble in the pond, because your expertise is someone else's learned skill, and the ripple reaches a shore you may never see. In This Episode 00:00 Cold open 00:30 Welcome and season framing 01:00 Fifteen years old, and the meetings he was never invited to 04:00 "Nothing about us without us": finding out decisions were made without him 06:00 Boycotting school, and the agency worker who finally leveled with him 07:00 The aging-out plan: an apartment, six months of help, then "you're on your own" 08:00 Practicing decisions while there's still a safety net 09:00 Why youth get left out: caseloads, staffing shortages, and old mindsets 11:00 Throwing the pebble in the pond: grassroots change from the ground up 14:00 Did he have an advocate? The people who took him under their wing 16:00 The lasting impact of one adult showing up for a teen 18:00 Aging out by the numbers, and why housing equals stability 18:30 Helping create the Foster Youth to Independence housing voucher 21:00 Getting housed is one thing, staying housed is another 22:00 The Permanency Pact and building a real support list 23:00 "Just like a CASA": the volunteer who stayed nineteen years 25:00 On connection, broken attachments, and being a gumbo pot of every home 25:30 What he's working on now: housing and a healthy workforce 27:30 How the community can support from the outside 28:00 What any volunteer can give: your time and your expertise 30:00 Making it easy to say yes, and getting back to grassroots outreach 31:00 Donating your small talk 32:00 Find your niche: closing words for the system, parents, and youth 34:30 Reflection and close About Our Guest Jamole Callahan spent six years in foster care across nine homes and aged out at eighteen. Today he is a co-founder of ACTION Ohio, a national speaker and trainer known as Mr. Motivator, and an advocate whose work helped advance the federal Foster Youth to Independence housing voucher for young people leaving care. Resources and Links Jamole Callahan  ·  [email protected]  ·  @Jamole Callahan on social media ACTION Ohio (Alumni of Care Together Improving Outcomes Now) Foster Youth to Independence (FYI) vouchers — HUD Fostering Stable Housing Opportunities Act (2019) Permanency Pact — FosterClub Voices for CASA Children National CASA/GAL Association for Children Share Your Voice This season is about the many different voices in the room when a child is in foster care. If that's you, whether you've been there as a professional, a foster or birth parent, or someone who lived it, and you'd like to share your perspective on the show, host Micaela Tracy would love to hear from you. Reach out at [email protected]. About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content note: this episode discusses aging out of foster care and homelessness, and includes brief strong language. Voices for CASA Children  |  By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care

Episode Summary For thirty years, neonatal nurse practitioner Tara Sundem watched newborns go through opioid withdrawal under bright lights, separated from their mothers, and for a long time she believed those mothers had brought it on themselves. Then she learned what she had been missing, and she set out to build the opposite of what she had been part of. As co-founder and executive director of Hushabye Nursery in Phoenix, she now cares for substance-exposed babies and their mothers together, treating the two as one patient. She talks with host Micaela Tracy about the night a baby in withdrawal changed her mind, why dignity is a clinical intervention and not a nicety, how she partners with the Department of Child Safety instead of against it, and what families navigating addiction and recovery actually need. Her message holds for anyone who has ever judged a parent from the outside: this is a brain disease, not a choice, and the earliest moments of a child's life can shape everything that follows. In This Episode 00:00 Cold open 00:30 Welcome, season framing, and a content note 01:30 Meet Tara: Hushabye Nursery and the whole-family model 02:00 The nurse who didn't understand: Tara's own change of heart 03:30 Adverse childhood experiences and rethinking the whole approach 05:30 What the research says about keeping families together 09:00 Open child welfare cases, and getting a baby home with mom 10:30 One little win, and changing the safety narrative 12:00 Back to 2015: the hospital and the 2:30 a.m. morphine call 14:00 The night it clicked: soothing a baby through withdrawal 17:30 "So what about the moms?" the question that reshaped the mission 19:00 It isn't a choice: understanding addiction with dignity 21:00 The HOPPE model: meeting mom, baby, and family together 23:00 Same room, six feet, and partnering with DCS 25:00 What a family actually hears when DCS arrives 28:00 Community, staying engaged, and giving back 29:30 Relapse without writing a parent off: the "oopsie" 34:00 Former clients who now do the work 36:00 A mother's impossible math 38:30 What Tara wants anyone who has judged to understand 42:30 Where to find Hushabye 43:00 Reflection and close About Our Guest Tara Sundem is a neonatal nurse practitioner with more than thirty years in intensive care and the co-founder and executive director of Hushabye Nursery, a Phoenix nonprofit that cares for opioid-exposed newborns alongside their mothers rather than separating them. Since 2020, Hushabye has cared for more than 1,000 babies and walks alongside the families learning to care for them. Resources and Links Hushabye Nursery  ·  480-628-7500 (call or text, available 24/7) How Childhood Trauma Affects Health Across a Lifetime — Dr. Nadine Burke Harris (TED Talk) Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) — CDC Voices for CASA Children National CASA/GAL Association for Children About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode includes discussion of substance use, addiction, and sexual violence, and may be difficult for some listeners. Voices for CASA Children  |  By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care

Episode Summary Phoebe Johnson spent her childhood living in foster care. Today she runs the kind of home she once needed. As executive director of Firm Foundation Youth Homes and Gigi's Cottage, she talks with Micaela about what it took to get there, the foster mom who never gave up on her, and the two models that shape how the girls in her care are met every day: Trust-Based Relational Intervention and Grace Based Parenting. Her central message holds for any adult showing up for a child carrying complex trauma. You can't redirect a brain until it feels safe, and connection is what heals it. In This Episode 00:00  Cold open 00:15  Welcome, season framing, and a content note 01:30  Meet Phoebe: Firm Foundation Youth Homes and Gigi's Cottage 03:00  Phoebe's story: foster care, a pastor's family, and seven years to permanency 08:00  Losing Ona, a scholarship she didn't know existed, and the people who walked her into adulthood 12:00  Stepping into the executive director role 14:30  Empathy for a system under pressure: community problem, community solutions 17:00  Why loving your staff well is how you love the girls well 20:00  Length of stay, permanency, and meeting each girl where she is 23:00  Trust-Based Relational Intervention and how complex trauma lives in the brain 26:00  Grace Based Parenting: connection before correction, and play as a regulator 30:00  Staying connected with girls who age out 33:00  What general audiences misunderstand about group homes 36:00  The gaps Phoebe sees, and how anyone can step in 38:00  Where to find Phoebe's work 39:00  Reflection and close About Our Guest Phoebe Johnson is the executive director of Firm Foundation Youth Homes and its DCS-licensed group home, Gigi's Cottage. She grew up in foster care herself and now leads the kind of home that shaped her. Resources and Links Firm Foundation Youth Homes Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI), Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development Grace Based Parenting by Tim Kimmel Voices for CASA Children National CASA/GAL Association for Children About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.   Voices for CASA Children  |  By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care

Episode Summary Dr. Scott Lyons explains why trauma is not about the event, it is about what it does to a body. He walks through co-regulation, why safety can stop feeling safe, and the one thing any caring adult can do differently tomorrow: play. In This Episode 00:00  Cold open 00:15  Welcome and episode framing 01:15  What "somatic" actually means, in plain language 04:45  What the body carries: trauma in the body, not the event 05:45  Memory, temporal collapse, and lifebooks 10:15  An ordinary Tuesday for a child: oxytocin, vasopressin, and why safety doesn't always feel safe 15:15  Why play and movement undo learned helplessness 22:10  Co-regulation, grounding before a visit, and "Mommy needs a moment" 32:50  Behavior is communication, and where CASA volunteers connect the dots 34:50  Hope, and the one thing to do tomorrow 37:30  Reflection and close About Our Guest Dr. Scott Lyons is a holistic psychologist, founder of The Embody Lab, and author of Addicted to Drama. He hosts The Gently Used Human podcast. Resources and Links Addicted to Drama: Healing Dependency on Crisis and Chaos in Yourself and Others The Embody Lab The Gently Used Human podcast Dr. Scott Lyons Website Voices for CASA Children National CASA/GAL Association for Children About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners. Voices for CASA Children  |  By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care

Author and national speaker Tori Hope Petersen joins host Micaela Tracy to talk about the people who shaped her: the court advocate who said "I'm not going anywhere," the foster mom Tanya who let her be a kid without turning every moment into a lesson, and her own decision to become a healed person instead of a hurt one. For anyone wondering whether small acts of consistency really matter, Tori's answer is clear: the seeds you plant today shape generations you may never see. Content note: Tori reflects on childhood abuse and family instability. Listener discretion advised. In This Episode 00:00 Cold open 00:30 Welcome and episode framing 01:00 Tori's story: foster care, reunification, and re-entering at 12 07:00 The court advocate who said "I'm not going anywhere" 1 3:00 The group home and a perspective shift 16:00 Choosing to be a healed person, not a hurt one 20:00 Tanya's house: not every moment is a teaching moment 28:00 Adoption and learning to receive family 34:00 Generational impact: the long game of showing up 37:00 Tori's books and where to find her work 38:00 Reflection and close Standout Quotes "Not every moment needs to be a teaching moment. Some moments just need to be: I'm here for you." "I don't want to be a hurt person that hurts people. I want to be a healed person that helps heal people." "You're not just breaking cycles for one person. It impacts generations." About Our Guest Tori Hope Petersen is a national speaker and author of Fostered and Breaking the Patterns That Break You. She grew up in the foster care system and was later adopted. Today she is also a foster mom, adoptive mom, and biological mom, and writes and speaks about identity, healing, and breaking generational patterns. Resources and Links Fostered and Breaking the Patterns That Break You by Tori Hope Petersen, available wherever books are sold Voices for CASA Children National CASA/GAL Association for Children About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

Host Micaela Tracy opens Season 3 with Jason Lewis, a student at Grand Canyon University, entrepreneur, and aspiring nonprofit founder who spent ten years in the foster care system. Jason talks about what it felt like to grow up alone inside a system that moved him 28 times and through 13 schools, and about the adults who actually got through to him: an advocate who never sugarcoated anything, who asked what he wanted, who took him to summer camps and arcades, and whose presence "screamed I love you" without ever needing the words. His message to CASA volunteers and any caring adult: earn the right to be heard before you try to help. It's a fitting opening to a season about understanding every voice in the room, beginning with the young people at the center of it all. In This Episode: 00:00 Welcome and Season 3 framing 01:00 Safety and consent note 01:30 Meet Jason: GCU, mentorship dreams, and life on campus 03:00 Ten years in care: 28 moves, 13 schools, and the loneliness of growing up that way 05:00 Being misunderstood as an eight-year-old in the system 07:00 The advocate who didn't sugarcoat and asked Jason what he wanted 09:00 What advocacy looked like in practice: arcades, summer camp, advocacy 14:00 The adults who left a lasting impression 17:00 Faith, ministry, and the future Jason is building 22:00 The friends who became family 26:00 What he'd change about how the system shows up for kids 28:00 Advice for caring adults: don't try to be a parent. Be a friend. 30:00 Reflection and close Standout Quotes: "You have to earn the right to be heard." "That tender love that screams I love you with just your actions is the best thing that I could have asked for." "Don't try to be a parent with them. Just try to be their friend." About Our Guest: Jason Lewis is a junior at Grand Canyon University who experienced foster care as a child. He's working toward starting a nonprofit that will mentor young people aging out of foster care. Links and Resources: Voices for CASA Children National CASA/GAL Association for Children About the Show By Their Side: Advocating for Children in Foster Care is produced by Voices for CASA Children. Season 3, "Understanding Every Voice in the Room," features practical, human conversations with professionals and people with lived experience. Hosted by Micaela Tracy. New episodes biweekly. The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of VOICES or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

Welcome to By Their Side, everyone! This episode features an interview with David Ambroz, a national poverty and child welfare expert and the author of the bestselling memoir A Place Called Home: A Memoir! Ambroz shares his powerful personal story of growing up homeless and in the foster care system and how those experiences shaped his lifelong mission to help children and families break the cycle of poverty! David explains that for him, "home" as a child was simply wherever he and his family could find shelter at the time - a church basement, a bus stop, or the subway. He describes the trauma of entering the foster care system, where most of the homes he was placed in were not truly "homes" filled with love and safety. As he's gotten older, David has come to define home not by physical walls but rather by the people and mission that sustain him. Our conversation explores how the child welfare and foster care systems have improved over time, with more policies and programs to support vulnerable children. However, David highlights the fact that there is still much work to be done to address the root causes of childhood poverty and homelessness, and he passionately argues that as a society, we need to stop treating these issues as just statistics and start seeing them as a moral necessity that affects the lives of real children. David also shares some inspiring stories of the "occasional angels" - teachers, social workers, and foster parents who made a profound difference in his life, even via small acts of kindness. He stresses that everyone has the power to be an "occasional angel" and make a big impact, whether by becoming a CASA volunteer, hiring a foster youth intern, or simply having meaningful conversations about these issues. The interview closes with David's call to action - for all of us to get involved, get uncomfortable, and do more to end the intergenerational cycle of poverty and trauma. He believes that with collective passion and action, we can create a society in which every child has access to the resources and support they need to thrive! Highlights: [1:45] - Home wasn't a place for David but rather the people and purpose that he chose. [3:38] - David argues that it's important to celebrate progress in child advocacy while continuing the work that remains unfinished. [5:09] - David reminds us that all wins are important, even imperfect ones. ​​ [8:36] - David encourages people to show children the same passion we give sports and celebrities. [9:52] - David believes that communities tend to step up during visible crises, but we need to shift to collective responsibility. [10:58] - David asserts that we need to address immediate crises like hunger while also fixing the systemic causes that create them in the first place. [13:41] - What did it feel like for David, as a small child, to be suffering yet completely ignored? [14:19] - Hear how David learned early on that society ignored his suffering, revealing to him how little his life mattered to others. [16:54] - Everyday "occasional angels" doing small, compassionate acts can drastically impact a child's life! [19:48] - ​​How might David's life have been different if more people had simply helped in small ways? [20:18] - David points out how a consistent adult presence such as a CASA could have guided him and profoundly changed his life trajectory. [23:44] - Hear how a question from David's mother awakened the idea of choice and sparked his first real hope. [26:00] - Having someone show you options and hope can transform survival-focused minds toward seeing a better future. [27:25] - David describes forgiveness as a lifelong discipline that enabled him to survive unbearable circumstances. [30:49] - Illness, not moral failure, explains many troubling behaviors. [32:35] - David argues that people misunderstand foster care and ignore their duty to oversee its power. ​​ [34:33] - David reiterates that kids living in foster care aren't broken and argues that we need to stop judging struggling families and workers. [37:08] - David feels that kids living in foster care aren't broken. [39:58] - The foster-friendly workplace certification encourages employers to support foster parents, and doing nothing is unacceptable. [41:22] - Don't wait for perfect conditions; show up with heart, take action, and always do more! [43:49] - Where can David be reached online? [44:56] - David expresses gratitude toward adults who helped him, but ending child poverty requires all of us to act. Links & Resources: David's Website David's Instagram Page David's Threads Page David Ambroz - A Place Called Home: A Memoir   Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Voices for CASA Children or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

I am joined in this episode by Jessica Sinarski, a licensed professional counselor, author, and founder of BraveBrains.  Jessica discusses her book What's Inside Your Backpack? which explores how caring adults can help children who have experienced trauma to feel safe, seen, and supported. Throughout the story, her book aims to convey that children are not alone in carrying the "heavy backpacks" of their trauma and that there are ways to find support and face those difficult emotions in empowering ways. Together, we discuss how adults (such as parents, teachers, and CASA volunteers) can approach supporting children who are dealing with big, scary emotions. Jessica highlights the importance of acknowledging the child's grief and pain rather than trying to fix the situation, and she suggests using shared language and metaphors from the book such as "bookmarking" difficult feelings in order to help children feel understood. Jessica highlights the need for adults to also process their own emotions and triggers so that they can show up fully for the children whom they support without projecting their own baggage, and she shares how having a community of trusted peers has been invaluable for her own self-care. Our conversation ultimately emphasizes the power of creating safe spaces for children to feel seen and heard! Highlights: [2:11] - Hear how Jessica unexpectedly found her passion in foster care work, inspiring her to write What's Inside Your Backpack? [4:00] - Jessica illustrates how healing from trauma involves support, self-compassion, and gradual progress. [6:49] - The book offers a powerful message that sharing emotional burdens makes them lighter and creates hope. [8:04] - Jessica hopes that her book helps adults take on difficult conversations with children via empathy and shared storytelling. [11:11] - What's Inside Your Backpack? offers shared language and tools for adults and kids to face emotions together. [12:38] - Kids need empathy, not fixing, while adults need to manage their own emotional triggers. [15:57] - Parenting traumatized children requires not being judgmental of how they grieve and cope. [18:51] - Before encouraging kids to lower their defenses, it's important to first ensure emotional safety. [20:14] - Trauma survivors need to learn when and where it's safe to relax their guard. [22:49] - Jessica highlights the value of helping kids build lasting trust with safe adults. [24:13] - Jessica suggests modeling emotional regulation aloud in order to normalize feelings. [26:45] - Listen as Jessica encourages processing emotions with adults, not kids, and sharing only age-appropriate honesty. [30:53] - Modeling emotions' beginnings and endings teaches kids that emotions are temporary and safe. [32:39] - Jessica expresses hope in child welfare increasingly embracing lived experience. [35:13] - Healing requires supportive friends who can meet emotional needs. [38:25] - Jessica explains that validation, not solutions, best comforts both adults and children during tough emotions. [41:12] - Find out where to connect with Jessica. Links & Resources:   Jessica's Website BraveBrains Jessica's LinkedIn Page Jessica Sinarski - What's Inside Your Backpack? Jessica's Books   Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this episode are those of the guests and host and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Voices for CASA Children or its affiliates. Content Warning: This episode may include discussions of sensitive topics that could be triggering for some listeners.

Welcome back to the show, dear listeners! I am joined in this episode by Tristian Smith, former Army officer, author, and Nebraska CASA volunteer who grew up in the foster care system living in nearly 30 different homes from ages 8 to 18. After experiencing abuse and instability in the system, Tristian went on to graduate college, serve in the military, and now advocates for children in foster care via his volunteer work. Throughout our conversation, Tristian shares his personal story - how he was placed in foster care after his mother passed away and how he and his brother were abused by their uncle. He describes the lack of consistency and support that he faced, with frequent school and home changes and feeling "invisible" in the system. Tristian highlights the importance of having caring adult mentors, noting that if he had a CASA volunteer early on, he likely would have been removed from his uncle's home much sooner. Listen as Tristian credits a few key mentors he met as a young adult in college for helping him develop the resilience and drive to achieve his goals, including graduating, joining the military, and eventually writing a book about his experiences. He stresses the need for foster parents to provide more than just the basics but also true care, compassion and communication. As a CASA volunteer, Tristian is now dedicated to being that consistent, supportive adult whom he wished he had growing up, and he encourages other former foster youth to get involved in advocacy work as it can provide a powerful perspective. Tristian's story is truly an inspiring example of how mentorship and a sense of purpose can help youth overcome adversity and reach their full potential, despite the challenges of the foster care system. I hope that you enjoy my conversation with Tristian, and, if you do, please be sure to grab a copy of his book, Against All Odds! Highlights: [1:20] - Hear how Tristian overcame childhood abuse and became an author and CASA volunteer. [5:02] - After cycling through 30 foster homes, Tristian finally thrived in therapeutic care and pursued multiple master's degrees. [7:19] - Tristian reveals how constant relocation hindered his ability to form long-term connections. [9:56] - Tristan believes that stricter foster parent standards and stronger empathy could have spared him years of neglect. [12:31] - Foster parent training overlooks communication, focusing instead on managing trauma rather than genuine connection. [13:06] - Tristian argues that foster parents need to engage children with love, learning, and compassion rather than screens. [16:36] - We discover how Tristian lost a loving foster home after a failed adoption and never regained that stability. [19:18] - Via discipline and leadership, Tristian's military service changed his trauma into self-reliance. [22:59] - Never having imagined such success, Tristian now inspires foster youth with lived experience and advocacy. [25:47] - Tristian credits two mentors he met as a young adult who became true parental figures in his life. [27:43] - Tristian encourages both foster youth and caregivers to build accountability, empathy, and resilience for success. Links & Resources: Tristian's LinkedIn Page Tristian Smith - Against All Odds: A Memoir

Thanks for tuning back in to By Their Side, dear listeners! For this episode, I interview Gaile Osborne, the executive director of the Foster Family Alliance of North Carolina. Listen in as Gaile shares her personal experience as a foster and adoptive parent, having opened her home to over 28 children living in foster care. Gaile highlights the critical role of having a "village" of support for foster parents, whether through paid help like nannies and nurses, or a network of family and friends. She also discusses the challenges of secondary trauma and burnout that can come with advocating for foster children and families, explaining how she had to set boundaries to take care of her own mental health, even taking a two-month break at one point. Gaile also touches on the trauma that foster parents themselves experience and the importance of respite care in helping them recharge. As an advocate, Gaile shares her perspectives on the need for policy changes, emphasizing the delicate balance foster parents must strike between advocating for the child's best interests and supporting family reunification. She highlights the invaluable role that CASA volunteers can play in supporting foster families and stresses the importance of volunteers who take the time to truly understand the family dynamic. Throughout our insightful conversation, Gaile's passion for supporting foster families and advocating for systemic change is obvious, and her personal experiences and professional insights offer a powerful perspective on the foster care system! Enjoy my conversation with Gaile Osborne! Highlights: [1:38] - Fostering requires a strong support network, blending trusted caregivers, paid help, and community support. [4:16] - Respite has been the foundation that kept Gaile's family functioning through difficult times. [6:56] - Gaile reflects on having embraced leadership but learning to set boundaries after secondary trauma overwhelmed her. [10:29] - Foster parents endure both secondary trauma and firsthand traumatic experiences. [11:24] - Gaile realized how neglecting her own family while overworking forced her to step back and heal. [13:55] - During trauma triggers, Gaile slows life down, returning to basics. [16:35] - By listening more and tracking patterns, Gaile encourages honesty and prevents predictable behaviors. [19:44] - Gaile valued GALs who quietly observed, respected the family, and offered genuine support. [21:57] - A dedicated GAL's consistent presence and advocacy significantly influenced Gaile's family's adoption outcome. [23:53] - Gaile asserts that without enough GAL volunteers, children risk lacking representation in court proceedings. [25:12] - Gaile stresses how churches and communities can ease foster burdens via small, practical acts of kindness. [28:21] - Hear how even small gestures of compassion eased Gaile's deep sense of isolation. [29:02] - Gaile often hears comments mistaking her for a grandmother, leaving her searching for witty comebacks. [31:12] - Gaile wrestles with balancing foster parents' rights while supporting reunification and maintaining vital family bonds. [33:09] - Fostering requires deep emotional investment, yet ombudsman advocacy and permanency remain critical needs. [35:39] - Getting kids into permanent homes faster takes new laws because long waits really hurt families. [37:19] - Gaile credits her eldest daughter's resilience and spirit for shaping her child welfare advocacy. Links & Resources: Gaile's LinkedIn Page Foster Family Alliance of North Carolina's Website   Disclaimer: The conversations you hear on this podcast reflect the personal views and experiences of our hosts and guests. They don't necessarily represent the perspectives of Voices for CASA Children.

Welcome back to By Their Side, everyone! Joining me today is someone with a raw, real, and inspiring story to share. Neil Underwood is the General Manager of Autonation Toyota Tempe, and he comes onto the show for this episode to share his past as a child living through what so many kids in the foster care system are living through today. Before he was leading teams and earning industry-wide awards in the automotive industry, Neil was a teenager sleeping in his car between foster placements, struggling to finish high school after losing his mom and brother at a young age. Listen in as Neil shares what it was really like to grow up in the system in the '70s and '80s, bouncing between homes, (some of which were not even licensed) and how the absence of support systems like CASA shaped his path. We discuss the turning points that helped him keep going, even when it felt like no one else was in his corner, and while Neil's story is raw and real, what really struck me most was his refusal to quit on himself, and how that mindset now drives the way that he leads others and gives back to his community. Neil and I also get into the practical ways that people can show up for youth in foster care, and we don't just just mean professionals but also neighbors, mentors, employers, anyone. Neil offers thoughtful advice to those trying to make a difference: be consistent, be real, and never underestimate the power of simply caring. This conversation got me thinking about the ripple effect of even one adult showing up, and I am sure that will inspire some deep thought within you, too! Neil is proof that resilience is real but also that no kid should have to do it alone. I am so grateful that he shared his story with me and with you! Highlights: [1:54] - Hear how Neil rose from poverty and foster care to become a longtime car industry leader. [3:51] - A lack of support systems left Neil drifting through unstable homes and sleeping in his car. [6:33] - Shelters were overcrowded and bleak, but Neil pushed forward, determined not to give up. [9:38] - Facing sudden independence when he aged out, Neil learned that trust builds via consistent care and presence in kids' lives. [12:51] - Neil believes that strong leadership means understanding and supporting employees at every level, face-to-face. [14:52] - Winning AutoNation's CEO Award helped affirm Neil's commitment to community. [16:34] - Neil is a champion for youth programs, ensuring measurable impact and long-term support even after aging out. [18:58] - Hear how having no safety net taught Neil to rely on himself and keep moving forward. [21:37] - Surrounding yourself with the right people is important for staying focused and avoiding setbacks. [24:58] - Neil found strength and purpose via sports and community support despite early failures and temptations. [27:38] - Supporting kids' dreams via volunteering can impact their future and leave a lasting impression. [30:14] - Neil believes that kids in foster care can thrive when shown care, consistency, and positive attention early on. [33:45] - Many kids in group homes flourish academically when given support, even when they are initially written off. Links & Resources: Neil's LinkedIn Page