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Are we expecting too much from children, or have we become a little too attached to what they should be able to do? From sitting through group time to navigating transitions and managing big feelings, there are a whole lot of expectations we place on children based on their age and what we think they should be capable of. In this episode, I'm unpacking why I prefer the term developmentally aligned expectations, how those little shoulds can get in the way of understanding behaviour, and how we can work out when to hold an expectation, scaffold towards it, or recognise that the expectation itself needs to shift. You'll hear: ✨ Why developmentally aligned expectations encourage us to work with the child in front of us, rather than relying on what children of a particular age should be able to do ✨ How knowing a skill and being able to access it in the moment are two very different things ✨ How to decide when an expectation needs to hold, when a child needs more scaffolding, and when the expectation itself might need adjusting ✨ Why some of the expectations we place on entire groups of children might be contributing to the very behaviours we're finding difficult We can hold high expectations for children while recognising what they're currently capable of. Sometimes that means offering more support, and sometimes it means questioning what we're asking of them in the first place.  Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

When did praising children become so dang controversial?! There’s a lot of noise around praise, from warnings about “good job” destroying intrinsic motivation to advice that we should avoid praise altogether. In this episode, I’m unpacking what the research actually tells us about praise, when it can be genuinely useful, and how we can use it as meaningful feedback without turning it into approval children need to chase. You’ll hear: ✨ Why the research doesn’t support a blanket “praise is bad” approach — and where some of the concerns around praise do have merit ✨ The difference between less effective praise like person, outcome and generic praise, and praise that draws attention to effort, process and progress ✨ Why sincerity, specificity and how praise is received by the child matter just as much as the words we choose ✨ How behaviour-specific praise can make behavioural learning visible, helping children notice the baby steps they’re making without turning praise into a tool for compliance **Very (very) mild coarse language in this episode. Praise doesn’t need to go in the bin, and neither does “good job.” When we use praise thoughtfully, it can give children useful information about their effort, choices and growing skills. Good job isn’t the problem; it just shouldn’t have to do all the heavy lifting. Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

What if we scaffolded children’s behaviour in the same way we already scaffold every other area of their learning? As educators, we understand that knowing how to do something and being able to do it independently aren’t necessarily the same thing but, when it comes to behaviour, we can forget this pretty quickly. In this episode, I’m taking Vygotsky’s ideas around scaffolding and the Zone of Proximal Development and applying them to behaviour, so we can think differently about the support children might need to meet our expectations. You’ll hear: ✨ How the Zone of Proximal Development can help us understand what children can do independently, with support, and what might currently sit outside their capacity ✨ Why scaffolding behaviour doesn’t automatically mean lowering our expectations ✨ How co-regulation, behavioural momentum, playfulness and boundaries can scaffold children towards the behaviour we’re asking for ✨ Why the same expectation can require completely different levels of support for different children (and even for the same child on different days) Behaviour deserves the same developmental lens we already bring to learning, and sometimes the most useful thing we can do is stop repeating the expectation and ask what support might help this child actually get there. Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

Why can we have hundreds of behaviour strategies at our fingertips and still find ourselves wondering what the heck to actually do when behaviour gets hard? Strategies absolutely have a place when we’re working with behaviour, but having more of them doesn’t necessarily make us better equipped to support the child in front of us. In this episode, I’m unpacking why behaviour strategies keep letting us down and why the answer often lies in understanding the behaviour well enough to know which support makes sense (rather than searching for the perfect strategy). You’ll hear: ✨ Why having more behaviour strategies doesn’t necessarily leave us feeling better equipped ✨ How the expectations we hold and the labels we give behaviour shape the strategies we reach for ✨ Why a strategy doesn’t have to immediately stop a behaviour to be “working” ✨ Why behaviour being contextual means the same strategy can work beautifully one day and fall completely flat the next Strategies are useful tools, but they can’t do the thinking for us. The more we understand the child, the context and what might be contributing to behaviour, the better placed we are to choose support intentionally - without needing another strategy every time something new comes up. Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

How do we hold boundaries without becoming harsh - and stay responsive without feeling like we have to let everything go? There can be a real tension between being firm and being fair when we’re working with behaviour. In this episode, I’m unpacking warm authority and what it looks like to bring warmth and steadfastness together, so we can lead with confidence, protect children’s dignity, and respond to the child in front of us without losing the boundary altogether. You’ll hear: ✨ Why rights-affirming practice doesn’t mean children always get to choose ✨ How warmth and steadfastness work together when we’re holding boundaries ✨ Why fair doesn’t always mean every child getting exactly the same response ✨ How to work out what genuinely needs to hold (and where there might be room to flex) We can be in control of the situation without trying to be in control of children, and the more confident we become in knowing what needs to hold, where we can flex, and how to stay warm while we lead, the easier it becomes to find that middle ground when behaviour gets hard. Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

Why can a child cope beautifully in one environment yet really struggle in another? Behaviour is incredibly contextual, and the spaces children spend their time in can have a much bigger influence on behaviour and regulation than we sometimes realise. In this episode, I’m unpacking why the environment is plays a major role in our behaviour support ecosystem - and why the most useful thing we can change is often what’s happening around the child. You’ll hear: ✨ How visual and auditory input can contribute to dysregulation ✨ Why opportunities for movement matter - and what happens when children are constantly asked to contain their bodies ✨ How spatial flow and bottlenecks can accidentally create behaviour hotspots ✨ Why felt safety, relational safety and belonging shape the emotional climate of a space The more we pay attention to where and when behaviour is happening, the better placed we are to notice potential mismatches and to make small, intentional changes that can make things easier for children and educators. Please note - very (very) mild coarse language in this episode. I cover the environment in much greater detail in my guide ‘The Stories of the Space’ - check it out here Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

Why can two children experience exactly the same thing... and respond completely differently? Temperament gives us a really useful window into how children experience and respond to the world around them, and understanding it can change the way we make sense of behaviour. In this episode, I’m unpacking why I think temperament is one of the closest things we have to a behaviour cheat code. You’ll hear: ✨ The three broad temperament types: slow-to-warm, easygoing and spirited ✨ The assumptions we can make about each (and why we need to question them) ✨ Why understanding temperament gives us some pretty powerful predictive information ✨ What goodness of fit means and how we can adapt our support to the child in front of us The more we understand about the child showing us the behaviour, the better placed we are to anticipate what they might find tricky - and support them through it. I cover temperament in much greater detail in my guide 'Tuning In To Temperament' - check it out here Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

Consequences get a pretty bad rap in behaviour support. Sometimes, fairly so. They’re widely misused, often completely disconnected from learning, and becoming more and more punitive - but consequences and punishment are not the same thing. In this episode, I’m unpacking how consequences can have a place in rights-affirming behaviour support - and become powerful teaching tools - when we use them intentionally. You’ll hear: ✨ Three common misconceptions about consequences and accountability ✨ The difference between natural, logical and illogical consequences ✨ Why consequences are only one tool in a much bigger toolkit ✨ When logical consequences can actually support learning (and when they probably won’t) ✨ The Five Rs Framework (from Amy McReady) for creating teachable consequences If you've ever felt lost with implementing effective consequences, this one’s for you. Let's start to shift our focus from whether consequences are "good" or "bad" to whether they actually help children learn. I cover consequences in much greater detail in my guide 'Consequences Done Differently' - check it out here Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

This is the final episode of The Bigger Than Behaviour Series! There’s a lot about education that feels heavy right now, and this series has made space for that heaviness - but there’s something else I think we need to talk about: the people we move through the system with. In this episode, I’m exploring the idea of finding your Marigolds - the people who help us grow, remind us who we are when things get hard, and give us somewhere safe to put the messy parts of this work. You’ll hear: ✨ Why finding your people matters when you’re working within systems you can’t always change ✨ Who our Marigolds are - and why we need to look out for pesky walnut trees ✨ What my own experiences with both marigolds and walnut trees taught me about whose voices we allow to shape our own ✨ Why I believe I wouldn’t be the teacher I am today without my marigolds This isn’t a conversation about surrounding ourselves with positive people and pretending the hard stuff isn’t hard. Our people can’t fix the education system, and they can’t remove every barrier or answer the questions we’re carrying. BUT They can sit beside us in the messy middle without making us more hopeless. They can help us stay connected to our values, our voice, our hope, and the reasons we chose this work in the first place. Please note - very (very) mild coarse language in this episode. Read Find Your Marigold: The One Essential Rule for New Teachers from Jenn Gonzalez Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

It's easy to feel overwhelmed by the challenges facing education right now. I've felt the heaviness, too. When the conversations are about burnout, behaviour, staffing shortages and system-wide change, it's easy to start believing that meaningful change is always somebody else's responsibility. In this episode, I sit down with Nikki - early childhood consultant, mentor and founder of NG Wellbeing Consulting - to explore what happens when we stop waiting for the perfect solution and start recognising the influence we already have. You'll hear: ✨ Why "little is better than not at all" has become Nikki's guiding philosophy ✨ The role curiosity plays in creating meaningful change ✨ Why simple, intentional practice is often more powerful than complex strategies ✨ Why leadership isn't just a job title, and that every educator has the capacity to influence change ✨ The tension between wanting to do more and not knowing where to start ✨ Why hope isn't found in having all the answers, but in taking the next small step If you've been listening to this series and feeling the weight of the challenges facing education, I hope this conversation feels like a deep breath. While none of us can change the whole system overnight, we can all be part of changing the experience children have today. Visit Nikki's website: NG Wellbeing Consulting Connect with Nikki on LinkedIn Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

It's easy it is to fall into blame - parents blaming educators, educators blaming parents. And when we do? The children miss out. In this episode, I sit down with Abby Thomason from Early Emotions to explore what happens when we stop searching for who's at fault and start exploring what children - and the adults around them - actually need. Together, we unpack why children's mental health is still treated differently from every other area of development, why early intervention shouldn't stop at speech or motor skills, and what happens when educators are expected to carry more than they were ever trained or supported to. We also explore the growing rates of preschool suspension and expulsion, the importance of supporting adults to respond to children's emotions, and why meaningful partnerships between families and educators have never been more important. You'll hear: ✨ Why children's mental health deserves the same attention as physical and developmental milestones ✨ The gap between identifying concerns and accessing meaningful support ✨ Why supporting children starts with supporting the adults around them ✨ What rising preschool suspension and expulsion rates reveal about our systems ✨ How blame creates distance between educators and families ✨ Why genuine partnership is one of the most powerful protective factors for children ✨ What gives Abby hope for the future of early childhood education This conversation is a reminder that behaviour is never just about the child. Creating better outcomes for children has never been about choosing between parents and educators; it's about building systems where both feel supported enough to stand on the same side. Connect with Abby on Insta @earlyemotions Download Abby's free guide - Navigating Little People's Big Emotions Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

Over the past few months, you've probably heard bits and pieces about the changes to the NDIS and the introduction of Thriving Kids. But what do these changes actually mean for children, families, and the educators supporting them every day? In this episode, I sit down with occupational therapist, author, and founder of Move About Therapy Services, Dave Jereb, to unpack the changes that are coming and the ripple effect they could have across early childhood settings and schools. Together, we explore what meaningful inclusion really looks like, why changing the environment is often more powerful than trying to change the child, and what educators can do when the support around children starts to shift. You'll hear: ✨ What the NDIS changes and Thriving Kids could mean for children, families, and educators ✨ Why participation - not just therapy - is at the heart of supporting children well ✨ What true inclusion looks like beyond simply being present in the classroom ✨ Why changing the environment is often the quickest and most respectful way to support behaviour ✨ How small shifts in connection, expectations, and meaningful engagement can transform a child's day ✨ Why educators need greater support, collaboration, and training if we want inclusion to be successful This conversation is honest, thought-provoking and, ultimately, hopeful. If you've been wondering what these policy changes might mean for your space, or you've ever found yourself asking how we can better support every child without burning out educators in the process, this episode is for you. Visit Dave's Instagram @moveabout.ot Buy Dave's book - Challenging The Story: A Surprisingly Simple Approach to Supporting Children with Challenging Behaviours Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

University teaches you the theory, but what happens when you step into a real classroom? In this episode, I sit down with Chloe - a recently graduated early childhood educator - to explore the gap between what we're taught at university and what it actually feels like to support children, families and colleagues in the real world. You'll hear: ✨ What surprised Chloe most when she stepped from university into the classroom ✨ The invisible mental and emotional load that no textbook can prepare you for ✨ Why understanding behaviour and responding to behaviour are two very different skills ✨ The role mentors play in shaping confident, capable educators ✨ Where Chloe believes universities are preparing educators well - and where there are still important gaps ✨ Why working alongside families is often far more complex than we expect This conversation is honest, thoughtful and incredibly reassuring. Whether you're a new educator finding your feet, a mentor supporting the next generation, or an experienced teacher reflecting on your own journey, I think you'll find yourself somewhere in Chloe's story. Connect with Chloe on RedNote (her ID is 602288284) Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

Most of us begin this work because we care deeply about children but, at some point, many of us discover that caring isn't as simple as we thought. In this episode, I sit down with Sarah Louise Nelson - early childhood educator, researcher, university lecturer and PhD candidate - to explore the concept of professional love, and why relationships aren't just a nice addition to education; they're the foundation that everything else is built upon. You'll hear: ✨ What professional love really means (and why it's so often misunderstood) ✨ Why relationships are an ethical commitment, not just a teaching strategy ✨ The connection between professional love, behaviour support and belonging ✨ How compassion fatigue changes the way we show up for children ✨ Why care has become undervalued in education, despite being essential for learning ✨ Why reconnecting with the relational heart of our work gives Sarah Louise hope for the future of early childhood This conversation is thoughtful, challenging and incredibly hopeful. If you've ever wondered how to keep caring deeply without losing yourself in the process, or what it really means to bring love into professional practice, this episode will leave you thinking long after it ends. Connect with Sarah Louise on LinkedIn Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.

Quality has become one of the most talked-about words in early childhood education but, somewhere along the way, many educators have been left wondering whether we're actually creating quality - or simply chasing it. In this episode, I sit down with Narelle Nettelbeck of Bugs and Bare Feet - early childhood consultant, mentor, and educator with more than three decades of experience - to explore what happens when compliance, expectations, and constant pressure start pulling us away from the very things that matter most. You'll hear: ✨ Why so many educators feel trapped between compliance and meaningful practice ✨ The difference between chasing quality and creating it ✨ How curiosity can become a catalyst for change ✨ Why asking "why?" might be one of the bravest things educators can do ✨ The impact of compassion fatigue and how to find joy in the work again ✨ Why educators need permission to trust themselves, their strengths, and their professional judgement This conversation is hopeful, grounding, and deeply reassuring. If you've ever felt overwhelmed by expectations, questioned whether you're doing enough, or wondered if quality has become more about paperwork than people, this episode is for you. Visit Narelle's website Bugs and Bare Feet Doors to The Behaviour Reset are OPEN! If you want to be able to understand the behaviour you're seeing, decide how to respond, and adapt your approach when things don't go to plan - without constantly questioning whether you're doing behaviour "right" - click here to join us! Doors close on October 22.