Advertise on podcast: Practicing Love: Have the Best Love and Sex of Your Life After 40

What happens when desire fades, sex feels effortful, or intimacy keeps getting interrupted by resentment, pressure, or exhaustion? In this episode of Practicing Love, I'm joined by Elana Auerbach, author of The Sure Thing: A Pleasure Practice to Revive the Spark, for a refreshing and deeply human conversation about desire differences, sensual connection, and what actually helps when intimacy takes a back seat. Rather than pushing through, fixing, or forcing desire, Elana offers a radically different orientation: pleasure as a practice of presence, intention, and safety. We explore: Why desire often disappears in long-term relationships, even when love is strong How resentment, withholding, and "trying to get it right" block sensual connection A new definition of orgasm as how much you can surrender to pleasure Why Responsive Desire needs context, safety, and curiosity to arise What to do when intimacy gets interrupted, and why nothing is lost when you pause How short, intentional pleasure practices (even 10 minutes) can rebuild closeness Learning to know what you want, and how to ask for it without pressure How devotion, play, and self-attunement can reignite the spark over time This conversation is for anyone who wants more aliveness, more connection, and more honesty around pleasure, whether you're partnered, single, or somewhere in between. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: CHROXRSGACRHE8NP

Reclaiming eros can impact every area of your life!  In this episode of Practicing Love, Shana James is joined by Erotic Wholeness Guide Darshana Avila, whose work has been featured on Netflix's Sex, Love & goop, The Guardian, The New Yorker, and more. Together, they explore an expanded understanding of eroticism — not as performance or sexuality alone, but as the life force energy of Eros that supports your creativity, intimacy, passion, and aliveness. Darshana invites us to rethink everything we've been taught about erotic energy, showing how cultural conditioning, people-pleasing, perfectionism, and nervous system dysregulation often suppress our erotic vitality — leaving us exhausted, and disconnected from our authenticity and from one another. This conversation weaves together somatic wisdom, relational insights, and deep compassion as Shana and Darshana explore how reclaiming erotic wholeness creates safety, presence, and intimacy in sex and intimacy, as well as every area of life. In this episode, you'll explore: What erotic wholeness (beyond sex) actually means  How erotic energy fuels creativity, connection, and vitality Why many people feel disconnected from desire and aliveness The role of nervous system regulation in intimacy and pleasure How people-pleasing and perfectionism suppress erotic expression Why integrating grief, shame, and protective strategies is part of erotic healing How safety and relaxation allow erotic energy to flow naturally This episode is an invitation to let go of pressure, performance and shame and find more of yourself -- your body, truth, and the full spectrum of your aliveness. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: WGWRQANBJDWAVVM6

A Conversation on Real Connection & Ecstatic Intimacy What do we actually long for in love? In this episode, Shana James is joined by Joanna Shakti, founder and facilitator of Ecstatic Intimacy, for a rich conversation about authentic connection, emotional depth, and intimacy that doesn't require shrinking, over-giving, or shape-shifting to be loved. Joanna introduces the concept of ecstatic authenticity — the shift from hiding parts of ourselves to keep the peace, to honoring who we truly are in relationship and lovemaking. From this place of authenticity, deeper emotional intimacy, trust, and soul-level connection become possible — and passion becomes grounded in honesty, support, and delight. Together, Shana and Joanna also explore masculine and feminine energy not as rigid roles, but as living polarities (like yin and yang) that can create greater attraction, freedom, and aliveness in conscious relationships. In this episode, we explore: Why authenticity is the gateway to deeper intimacy What it really means to feel fully seen, understood, and "gotten" in love How conscious conflict can become communion instead of disconnection A more liberating approach to masculine and feminine dynamics in intimacy The conscious path from authenticity → intimacy → ecstasy If you're longing for a relationship where you can be fully yourself — and experience passion, devotion, and real connection — this conversation is for you. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: OHMHFXBSHHFV307Z

On today's Practicing Love podcast, Shana James is joined by divorce coach and NLP practitioner Rachael Sloan for a powerful conversation about how relationships break down — and how they can be repaired before it's too late. Rachael works primarily with men navigating separation and divorce and is the creator of the Better Beyond Divorce program. Together, Shana and Rachael explore emotional regulation, conflict, boundaries, survival responses, and the unconscious patterns that couples bring into relationships. This episode is for anyone who wants to communicate more effectively, stay connected during conflict, and build a relationship that can weather hard moments with greater compassion and clarity. It's a hopeful conversation about staying in love longer, even when things get hard, and how to stop the downward spirals that couples get stuck in.   Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: 3XO0LDATK42BXEXU

Why does connection and communication break down in long-term relationships, even when love is still there? In this episode of Practicing Love, Shana James and Hannah Chapman explore the hidden dynamics that cause couples to talk past each other, shut down, or feel chronically misunderstood. Drawing from vulnerable relationship experiences and decades of coaching, this conversation illuminates how defensive communication forms, what matters more than "being right," and how to rebuild connection over time. You'll learn: Why long-term couples often repeat the same painful communication cycles The difference between defensive communication and open, connected dialogue How curiosity and nervous-system safety change dynamics What it really takes to rebuild emotional intimacy and trust How partners feel seen, heard, and met again Whether you're feeling disconnected, stuck in recurring arguments, or longing for deeper closeness, this episode offers practical insight and hope for creating a relationship where communication becomes a source of connection, not conflict. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!   Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: JYEBEACXSYUOYD5E

Dating feels brutal for so many relationship-ready singles, especially over 40. In this episode, Shana James talks with Adam Cohen Aslatei, CEO of Three Day Rule, about how AI is reshaping modern matchmaking and how AI makes it easier for people to date and find real, emotionally available love. They explore dating burnout, why the apps are failing people, the power of intentional dating, and how AI can even support deeper human connection. A must-listen for those who want to stop unconsciously swiping and start consciously dating and creating meaningful relationships. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: IHVPCN3F5C1BO2Q0

Passion doesn't fade because "that's just what happens." Passion fades because couples are missing a few essential skills. When you learn them, you can create spark and reignite it in long term relationships. In today's video, I break down some deeper reasons passion fades in long-term relationships and marriages, based on 20 years as a dating and relationship coach and the teachings from my book Honest Sex.

How do you have a relationship that feels peaceful and loving, rather than feeling like a rollercoaster? In all phases, from dating to long term relationships, this is something clients tell me they want most. Therapist and author Jessica Baum joins me to explore why safety is essential for real love, and what the foundations of a healthy relationship are. We dive deep into attachment theory, nervous system regulation, and the biology of trust, exploring how early attachment wounds shape your adult dynamics, and usually not for the better. You'll learn what healing requires, and how to create the secure, loving bond you've always longed for, but were never taught how. We talk about how to heal, and even bypass, the struggles most people face in love and relationships. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: CNP489SMTIUXHOMC

Trust can break in small ways, or shatter completely. Craig and Michelle Pera, founders of The Mindful Habit, join us to talk about how they help couples navigate trust challenges — from minor breaches to sex and porn addiction. Drawing on their professional experience, and own healing journey, they give you practical tools to rebuild trust, deepen connection, and restore intimacy in your relationship. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: ELRUV6G8JHUP8JAW

If you want to feel more loved and respected in your relationships, this episode is for you. Shana talks with Karen McMahon, founder of Journey Beyond Divorce about how claiming your self-worth and setting healthy boundaries can transform your love life. The more you stand in your truth, protect your heart, and create deeper, more fulfilling connections Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: WGWRQANBJDWAVVM6

Most of us never got the "emotional potty training" we needed as kids. Instead, we learned to hide, suppress, or ignore our feelings, which often wreaks havoc in our adult love lives. In this Practicing Love episode, I talk with therapist Rachel Kaplan, author of Feel, Heal, and Let That Sh*t Go, about why learning to feel our emotions is the missing key to deeper intimacy, resilience, healing, and keeping a relationship alive. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: X6DOTPWFPO5ZGZDX

If you think shared values are the key to making a relationship last, think again. Shana James talks with Nick Brancato, author of Prioritize Us: Unlock Lasting Love with One Simple, Proven Test, about why relationships fall apart despite shared values. We discuss the real keys to lasting love and intimacy. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!   Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: 3XO0LDATK42BXEXU

If you've ever found yourself replaying childhood wounds in your romantic relationships, this episode explores how parent-child dynamics often show up in love. And how you can break the cycle and create a relationship rooted in wholeness, sovereignty, and joy. We look at the path from codependency to conscious connection — and what it takes to truly heal the mother and father wounds. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!   Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: JYEBEACXSYUOYD5E

The relational patterns you learn in childhood shape your romantic relationships, often without you knowing it. In this episode, we dive deep into how early experiences influence adult love — and what it takes to unlearn those patterns to build real, lasting connection. Host Shana James and executive coach Jake Fishbein explore emotional resilience, trust, and the courage to embrace vulnerability in love. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!   Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: FTDWN40V3UIZ5PJL

A big reason many relationships fall apart is because most couples don't make clear, conscious agreements. In this episode, I talk with Krista and Will VanderVeer (hosts of The Art of We podcast) about how relationship agreements can profoundly deepen intimacy, support emotional repair, and help couples navigate the ups and downs of love with more grace and clarity. Find out how to have the best love and sex of your life!     Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/prigida/burble License code: HDF76SDCD7O26RO5