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Send us Fan Mail Laura Riordan knows that feeling "too happy" can be dangerous. Most people don't have to worry about feeling too happy, but, when you live with Bipolar 1, that euphoric feeling can be a very real and very nefarious signal that you are slipping into mania. Once that slide happens, it is very difficult to course-correct and you may be flying high on a terrifying ride heading towards the inevitable crash of severe depression. This is what it is to live with the bipolar beast, as Laura calls it. She's learning to tame it. Laura navigates life with bipolar disorder; she and her partner, Chris, are watchful for signs like losing sleep or spiking confidence. They know that coincidences can lead to magical thinking; they check in with each other. It is a delicate dance and finding that content, peaceful middle ground is part of the key to success regarding disease management.   Today, Laura is in training to become a Certified Peer Specialist so that she can help other people living with mental illness by supporting them, sharing her own story, and walking beside them as they navigate the complex and fractured mental health system.  Laura has benefitted from peer support and and Depression/Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) online support groups, which she writes about in the essay she wrote for us a few years ago, "How Bipolar Support Groups Helped Change My Life", which Laura reads aloud in this episode of the show.  Laura is open about how stigma can inhibit help-seeking and can encourage people who are suffering to mask and hide their symptoms, which can be catastrophic. Laura also shares her personal experiences about trial-and-error medication management, side-effects, spotting triggers, setting boundaries, and taking care of herself. If you’re searching for bipolar disorder support, DBSA resources, peer support specialist insights, coping strategies, or an honest conversation about non-linear recovery, this one is for you. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and be sure to leave us a review! Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Casey Cannizzaro is a mental health and addictions clinician and three-time Recovery Diaries author, but he's far, far more than that. Casey's writing on our site-- we encourage you to voraciously devour each of his essays, findable via the links to come-- is exhilarating; his voice is unique, roving, insatiable, and unlike anything else we've published. Casey is just like Recovery Diaries itself: the perfect antidote to AI slop and Chat GPT sterility. His writing will knock your socks off, and make you forget your feet are cold.  But we're not just here to brag about this really talented guy; we sit down with Casey to talk to him openly about his path from his last stretch of treatment into the work he does now, including substance use counseling, LGBTQIA+ focused care, and admissions for a fully virtual intensive outpatient program. Casey talks about his sexuality, his family, his ups, his downs, and he does it with integrity and flair.  Maybe one of the loveliest things about this interview is that it's an opportunity for two men who live with mental illness and aren't afraid to be vulnerable about their emotions to connect with each other, and share their mutual appreciation and respect for the other. A little love-bombing is healthy! During the show, Casey reads his beautiful essay “The (im)possibilities of Love with Bipolar,” a story of devotion, medication, relapse, and grief told with Casey's signature wordplay and vivid imagery. "Recovery is possible. Recovery is f****d," Casey says. Who could disagree with that assessment? If this conversation resonates, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find these stories. And after you've listened, check out Casey's other two, fabulous essays on our site: Six Days on the Good Unit: Hospitalized and Alive and After I Destroyed Myself: Fast and Furious with Bipolar Disorder and Addiction; you'll be glad you did. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Natalia Aiza, LPC, is the founder of Kairos Wellness Collective in Boulder, Colorado. She is educated, well-informed, articulate, empathic, and aware. She's just the kind of person you'd think would be perfectly well-suited to quickly identify and address a mental health challenge in herself, right? Well, not so fast.  Natalia believes now that she was living with OCD since age seven, but she didn't recognize it for years; even while training and working as a therapist. Natalia describes her early experiences with motherhood, plagued by incessant, intrusive thoughts about harming her baby, but even though she managed to get through these thoughts, soon, another nagging obsession took that one's place: she needed to control everything about her child's (and later, her children's) eating. For her, it was just a concerned mom being mindful about “healthy eating” In reality, this was uncontrolled, untreated, and unidentified OCD running amok, resulting in food shopping trips taking multiple hours, methodically scanning labels on every possible food item, and placing unhealthy ideas about food into her children's minds. Natalia openly describes the shame, guilt, grief, and other negative consequences of what she now calls orthorexia-by-proxy; a disordered obsession and compulsion with the healthy eating of others. A few years ago, she wrote a wonderful, open and honest essay about her particular form of OCD, and she reads it aloud here on the show. Natalia, now successfully managing this mental health challenge (with grown children who are able to joke about it with her) discusses with us why reassurance-based talk therapy can unintentionally enable the OCD brain, and how exposure and response prevention (ERP) helps you stop responding to intrusive thoughts with rituals and safety behaviors. Natalia discusses SSRIs, what it means when OCD gets quieter instead of disappearing (it may very well never disappear, and Natalia still has her moments of struggle), and why access to proper OCD treatment is still a significant public health problem. It is so easy for OCD to get missed, even by a professional, and that's why our conversation with Natalia Aiza is so important; so many people out there are struggling with something they may not understand; a mental health challenge that presents itself under the guise of something "good" or "healthy", but one that actually has the potential to cause harm. Subscribe for more Recovery Diaries in Depth, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review if you enjoyed our conversation with Natalia. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail They thought she was "just an anxious kid" growing up-- that, other than that, there was nothing really "wrong" with her. But writer and translator Giovanna Errore was suffering in silence; trying like hell to be a functional teenager and then young adult while something was happening in her body and her mind that she didn't understand. She was masking, feeling psychic and physical pain and, finally, a fibromyalgia diagnosis turned the key and unlocked the door, helping her heal. Chronic, unrelenting pain isn't just a physical malady; there is a psychological component to it-- the ceaseless patter of self-eroding doubt, isolation, and allowing the external doubt of your own reality to slowly become your own internal monologue. Giovanna shares enthusiastically during our interview about her fascinating and hopeful research from her graduate work in psychological communication on chronically ill people in online communities, and why participation can increase self-determination, belonging, and satisfaction with life; perhaps that's why she likes Recovery Diaries so much! We are, after all, our own online community of vulnerable, capable human beings telling their stories and supporting each other.  Then Giovanna reads her essay “How Severus Snape Saved My Life,” exploring how this intense, cloistered fictional character can mirror the parts of us we keep hidden. After all, Snape had something going on inside which he couldn't share with anybody. Giovanna openly and freely talks with our host, Gabe Nathan (who thoroughly enjoyed editing Giovanna's essay several years ago) about therapy, stigma, work, accommodations, and the challenging, but necessary, choice to stop keeping secrets.  Subscribe to Recovery Diaries in Depth for more earnest, honest conversations like this one. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail A film is a snapshot in time. When we first met this extraordinary young woman, it was eight years ago. Back then, she was Lilah James, an extraordinarily talented fashion and conceptual designer creating a bold, beautiful collection for her final project, "Anxiety Descending." Each look represented a different facet or symptom of her CPTSD diagnosis and she and her work are beautifully represented in our film about her, Recovery on the Runway | PTSD, Mental Health & Fashion.  So much as changed since 2018, for Lilah, for the world. She is now Lilah Velez, happily married to her devoted and safe go-to support person. She is still living with and navigating life with CPTSD, finding healthy ways to cope with triggers and panic, trying her best to notice when things aren't going well before a crisis emerges so she can make a plan to take care of herself and her needs.  Lilah is open and honest about her experiences with mental healthcare, including her participation in intensive outpatient program (IOP) programs. Lilah, in her vulnerable and disarming way shares about how needing different levels of care at different points in her life, and knowing what she needs when she needs it, is not a sign of failure, weakness, or some kind of setback; it is simply meeting a therapeutic need. Lilah knows the foolishness of comparing your struggles to somebody else's and about the true cost of carrying secrets. Lilah also discusses, in our candid and thoughtful interview, about how, to someone with CPTSD, finally getting what you've always longed for: a peaceful living space with a safe, supportive partner, can be a shock to the CPTSD brain, a brain that is always on high alert, looking for the next betrayal or unsafe situation. She is learning to calm that part of her brain and accept her safety, while continuing to create and take care of herself.  This episode is a must-hear for anyone with CPTSD or anyone who loves someone who lives with this mental health challenge. Lilah is hopeful, brave, and honest, and we hope you share this conversation with someone in your life who needs it. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Someone once turned to our guest, Coli Sylla, and said to him, “Keep that mental health crap to yourself.” Thankfully, that b******t didn't fly. Award-winning screenwriter and director Coli Sylla talks about what happens when creativity, bipolar disorder, trauma, and ambition collide. While the entertainment industry has changed significantly over the last few decades, as Coli can attest there are parts of that world that still punish vulnerability, and encourage people with mental health challenges to  shrink themselves. Coli opens up about bipolar II disorder, ADHD, generalized anxiety, and how he manages depression, especially when grief and life stress hit at the same time. Coli talks openly about how living with mental health challenges as a Black man is different, and how many of his peers simply lack the language to express themselves, or know what to do when one of their own opens up. Coli reads aloud his powerful essay, “The Death That Gifted My Purpose, Living and Writing with Trauma and Bipolar Disorder,” recounting the night his college roommate Troy died and how a 3 a.m. wake-up has haunted him for decades. Coli talks about the practical side of recovery: therapy, medication management, sleep, sleep, and sleep, and building a creative life that can survive mood shifts. Coli is working on a new film, f.31.9, the diagnostic code for bipolar disorder. We celebrate his creativity, his ambition, and his recovery in this compelling interview you won't want to miss.  Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail It's hard to imagine what you'd do if you're a touring musician whose primary instrument is the guitar, and you start to lose the use of your hands. It may seem like an incongruous response, but Paul Curreri chose to stop drinking. And it wasn't exactly an intentional choosing of sobriety. It was more, "I'm not drinking today and I'm probably not going to drink tomorrow either." And that has turned a choice that he makes every single day.  Like so many in the music industry, Paul felt connectedness to the life that alcohol gave him; the clubs and bars where everybody congregated, the vibe, but Paul knew that alcohol was taking away far more than it was giving him. He knew he was making up stories about "sober people" and what they were like, and he knew he needed to make changes to help his marriage and to help himself.  While he is still struggling with his hands, and the relatively recent diagnosis of tension myositis syndrome, he is trying to be and stay in the moment. He very recently returned to the stage for the first time in a very long time, and our conversation on Recovery Diaries in Depth is a vulnerable, emotional, sincere return to Paul's essay he wrote for us when he was five years into his sobriety from alcohol, an essay Paul had not returned to since it was published. His reading of that essay and our conversation are as genuine and as gentle as it gets.  Our conversation wanders like a contemporary folk song Paul may well have written himself; covering sobriety, relapse prevention, anger, ambivalence, chronic illness, identity loss, grief, recovery, the soothing noise of music to the din of modern life; Paul and our host, Gabe are two men living with mental illness who connect intimately and sincerely, and it's a conversation you won't want to miss out on. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Recovery Diaries in Depth guest Nick Emeigh and our show's host Gabe Nathan are old friends, both of whom live with mental health challenges. They're both passionate, compassionate, vulnerable, and unafraid (while simultaneously being afraid of pretty much everything). That's a lot of what makes them good friends, and so much of what makes this interview a must-hear.  Right out of the gate, their conversation goes right towards suicide. And it's no accident that it happens that way: Nick just came to this interview from a Bucks County school that recently lost a young man to suicide. Nick helps people in Bucks County every single day who are contemplating suicide, have attempted, family and community members who have suffered a suicide loss. He lives and breathes mental illness and suicide every single day as Executive Director of NAMI-Bucks County, PA. Nick has survived multiple suicide attempts, he is in addiction recovery, he is a peer, an advocate, a mental health superhero (watch this film to be acquainted with the coolest guy in tights since Peter Pan) and he never stops urging politicians, changemakers, and community members to pay attention, to listen. To listen to stories. To his story.  Nick shares that story with refreshing honesty: a tale of intense bullying and early suicidal thoughts, an eating disorder shaped by control and approval, addiction, psychosis, trauma and grief. But what makes recovery sustainable or even possible? Therapy, medication, self-care, peer support, and the work of building NAMI Bucks County into a network that reaches tens of thousands through school education, support groups, and a warm line; and it's so, so much more. It's Nick's irrepressible personality that is heartwarming, sincere, and worthy of attention. So pull up a chair alongside these two old friends and listen. And share. And feel. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Today, Kayla Ackelson lives, breathes, and thrives through independent expressive, mixed media artistry. But it wasn't always that way. For years, she struggled with incessant worries-- about everything, from swimming to sleepovers, movies, the dark (where people often watch movies), to people she loved dying. Never fear, though; she had maladaptive coping strategies to "help" her through all of those unrelenting anxieties. Afraid your partner will leave you? Cling on tighter! Scared of things; just ratchet up the hypervigilence! Check on everyone, all the time. Check, check, check. Then, check again; just to be sure. Kayla knew living this way was unsustainable; she would hide at work, trying to pull herself together through her tears. It couldn't go on like this. Gradually, slowly, with therapy, with insight, with help; from herself and from others, she started to turn the corner. Medication, meditation, journaling, neuroplasticity, and the practical mental health habits that actually support recovery: sleep, hydration, easing up on caffeine, and making room for quiet came along for the ride, and now, she's in a better place. She's writing, creating, and is the host of her own podcast, Unhurried. She encourages you to pause, unwind, maybe have a cup of (not thoroughly caffeinated) tea, and listen. We extend that invitation to you, too. We're so grateful to Kayla for coming on as a guest to talk about her mental health, her life, and her recovery. She reads her lovely essay, "It Was Cute Until It Wasn’t Anymore – My OCD, Anxiety, and Depression" aloud on the show, and it's a treat.  If you’ve ever felt alone in your own mind, we hope this brings language, comfort, and a next step. Subscribe for more Recovery Diaries In Depth, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find these mental health stories. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail From ages 13-19, Levi Mericle wanted to die, pretty much every day. There was reckless, impulsive behavior, suicide attempts, hospital stays, agonizing torment for Levi and assuredly endless nights of the most intense anxiety possible for his devoted parents, who struggled to understand what was happening to their previously happy-go-lucky boy.  Serious and persistent mental illness can often rip families apart. Our Executive Director and podcast host, Gabriel Nathan, has seen it in his years working at a locked, inpatient psychiatric hospital; parents absolutely at their wits end after years and years of destructive behavior by children, sometimes despairing and bereft of resources and support, child/parent bonds can become fractured, marriages can be obliterated-- mental illness is the ultimate wrecking ball. But Levi's bipolar disorder was no match for his parent's love; they refused to watch their son succumb to this illness, which tempted Levi to end his life by his own hand countless times. Neither would Levi's family let their strong Christian faith sway them from seeking urgent psychiatric help for their son. As Levi says in his interview, many Christians view mental illness as either not real, or something that needs to be "given to God", to the exclusion of potentially lifesaving medications and crisis interventions. Levi is an eternally grateful son, citing the love of his family as the main reason why he is still here, singing the songs life wants to hear.  Our interview with Levi is wide-ranging and passionate; he is an ardently sensitive and introspective soul who spares no detail in discussing his incredibly dark adolescence and young adulthood, and what helped him turn the corner to finding purpose, meaning, and a yearning to live.  Levi closes our time together by reading his poem “The Corner In A Dark Room,” a stark, accurate portrait of depression’s numbness and time distortion.  If this conversation helps you, subscribe, share it with someone who needs hope today, and leave a review so more people can find Recovery Diaries In Depth. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail For decades, Jacquese Armstrong let others write her story. She was labeled, marginalized, medicated, and was essentially given a life sentence by physicians who spent no more time with her than you spend with the clerk at a 7-Eleven. She was told she'd never work. She was told. Now, she tells. And the story she tells is one of boundless creativity, advocacy, a passionate engagement in the expressive arts. She speaks about the system that subjugated her; pigeon-holed her, overdiagnosed and overmedicated her, took away her agency and her hope.  Jacquese challenges herself and us to not accept culturally incompetent care, to not lay down and accept whatever is thrown at us by the medical model, a system that routinely fails to see people as complex and nuanced human beings. She holds fast to her faith, her compassion for herself, and her love of creating. Jacquese is an award-winning poet and memoirist who has rebuilt her life following decades of medications that stunted and blunted her. She still struggles, and she is open about that as she is about so much; ageism, misogyny, psychiatric harm, injustice; she pours out her heart in articles, essays, poems, and her forthcoming book.  Jacquese has worked ceaselessly to help others, and to build the ladder, rung by rung, she uses to climb out of the pit she found herself in. Her mental health challenges may always be there, but she is learning to live and fight for herself and her dignity and her rights, every day; doing so artfully and gracefully.  If you’ve ever felt mislabeled, unseen, or stuck in a system that talks over you, Jacquese Armstrong offers validation, direction, and hope. Her extraordinary and moving book, fabricating a home 'cause you never had one, is available for purchase here. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Manndi Maphies lives with obsessive compulsive disorder. It was undoubtedly present in her childhood, where she exhibited behaviors that could be perhaps described as "quirky" but her OCD caught fire following a miscarriage, followed by a new pregnancy. Manndi was, understandably, terrified that she miscarried because of something she "did", and she was absolutely not going to let that happen again; so OCD obligingly took over, letting Manndi know that she needed to compulsively wash her hands, be frightened of certain foods, watch every move she made... in order to keep her unborn child "safe."  Fortunately, Manndi's doctor convinced her that medication, while it carried some small risks, might very well do less harm to her unborn child than her out-of-control OCD was doing, in the form of extreme stress, compulsive behaviors, and unmanaged anxiety. Manndi listened, and got help that helped. In Manndi's wonderful essay, "Excuse Me While I Obsess; Learning to Manage my Lifelong Struggle with OCD", she writes about her mental health and her recovery. She has been through divorce, unexpected loss, and blending families, where stress briefly outpaced her tools. But Manndi doesn't fall apart; she regroups and she falls almost effortlessly into new seasons of her life, finding joy, creating and connecting.  Manndi finds comfort in faith, humor, and community. She is using her voice and her writing to help others find hope and help. We are so grateful that she was our guest here on Recovery Diaries in Depth, and we are lucky to share her wisdom and kindness with you.  If this conversation resonates, share it with someone who needs language for what they’re feeling, then subscribe, leave a review, and join our mailing list at recoverydiaries.org so you never miss new stories, essays, and films.  Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail “If I don’t communicate, I feel like I’m disappearing.”  This is a bedrock principle that guides Sarah An Myers in her advocacy for schizoaffective disorder, her writing, and her life. She refuses to disappear, she refuses to be silent, she refuses to let others speak for her. Sarah An Myers lives with schizoaffective disorder, a mental illness that combines aspects of a thought disorder (hallucinations, delusions, psychosis) with symptoms of a mood disorder (mood instability, depressive or manic episodes).  While schizoaffective disorder is an undeniable component of who Sarah is, she is so, so much more than her mental illness. She writes constantly, giving people a window into her unique and nuanced perspectives about mental illness and other topics, she lives independently, she cares for her dog, she takes fencing lessons, she travels around the world. Sarah's life is as bold and vibrant as the striking pink coat she wears in the film we made about her called "Thriving with Schizoaffective Disorder".  In this episode of Recovery Diaries in Depth, our host, Gabriel Nathan, is joined not just by Sarah An Myers, but by filmmaker Glenn Holsten who directed that film about Sarah's life with schizoaffective disorder. In this vulnerable, intriguing three-way conversation, Gabe, Glenn, and Sarah talk about the creative process of documentary filmmaking, and Recovery Diaries' collaborative approach to creating a piece like "Thriving with Schizoaffective Disorder." Glenn and Sarah really worked as a team, both in pre-production conversations and during the shoot to create moments that felt authentic to Sarah's experience, like a subway shoot to let viewers see and hear what it is like to hallucinate, and an in-studio recording session where actors read aloud some of Sarah's auditory hallucinations. Sarah speaks openly about what the experience was like, both making the film and then her anxiety upon its release. She also shares some of her very important views about the infantilization of psychiatric patients, the role medication has played in her life and recovery, and the work she is doing now. You won't want to miss this conversation with some extraordinary and creative human beings, doing vital work to de-stigmatize mental illness in new, original ways. About Sarah: Sarah An Myers is a writer, mental health advocate, and creative living in New York City. She writes a column on Psychology Today about psychotic disorders, reporting on the latest and cutting-edge research to combat stigma. She has written for human rights, freethinking, psychiatry, and literary publications including Free Inquiry, The Brooklyn Rail, Open Minds Quarterly, Psychiatry at the Margins, and more. She earned her MA in behavioral neuroscience from the University of Missouri-St. Louis and her MFA in creative nonfiction from The New School. She recently finished a literary memoir on living with schizoaffective disorder and is looking for an agent. Find her on social media @sarahanmy.  Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Erika Nichols-Frazer joins us today as our guest. She's an old friend of Recovery Diaries, having published three essays with us; Lies Mania Has Told Me, A Double-Edged Sword: Facing the Grief of Miscarriage with Bipolar Disorder, and the essay we're privileged to have her read aloud during this episode, Manic MFA: How My Degree Almost Cost Me My Sanity. While Erika is now a profilic writer, "Manic MFA" was, in fact, the very first time Erika had every written publicly about her bipolar diagnosis, a fact we at Recovery Diaries are very proud of. Erika speaks openly and candidly about her decision to write about the pressures and triggers she was experiencing during her MFA program, and the impact her mental illness and its symptoms of mania had on her relationship with her husband.  Our interview with Erika is expansive and hopeful; covering how women with mental illness are treated in literature, and #irl, how her relationship with food has evolved over the years, where she has been in the early days of her bipolar diagnosis, and where she is now. Erika is thoughtful, insightful, and easy to talk and listen to; we think you'll find our conversation with her illuminating and impactful. She has a lot to say about mental health storytelling, and advice for anyone considering putting pen to paper with a mental health narrative of their own. We're so grateful to Erika for taking some time to talk with us on "Recovery Diaries in Depth." Like our conversations? If you find them helpful and hopeful, chances are someone you love will, too. So share us with someone who needs us, and leave a review to help more listeners find stories that help. About our guest: Erika Nichols-Frazer (she/her) is the author of the memoir, Feed Me: A Story of Food, Love and Mental Illness and the poetry collection, Staring Too Closely. She has two books forthcoming in 2026, the poetry chapbook, Can you see her, the moon? and the short story collection, No One Will Ever Hear You. Erika's work has been published in numerous literary magazines and venues such as HuffPost Personal, River Teeth's Beautiful Things, Emerge Literary Journal, and others. She has an MFA in Fiction from the Bennington Writing Seminars. She lives in Vermont and works at Vermont State University. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/

Send us Fan Mail Today, Chris Russell is a grounded, hopeful human being who helps others navigate suicidal ideation as a volunteer for the Suicide/Crisis Lifeline. He definitely still has his struggles with symptoms related to his bipolar ii diagnosis, but he is managing his mental health in a way that was inconceivable to him not too long ago, where he was struggling with intense, unmanaged anger, impulsiveness, incessant thoughts of taking his own life. In this moving and heartfelt interview, Chris opens up to host Gabe Nathan, who struggles with many of the same issues Chris does, about his mental illness, how it has impacted his work as an actor, writer, and teacher, and where he was in his mind the night that he finally reached out for help, to what was then the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. It wasn't perfect or without frustrations (after all, Chris was 44th in the queue) but it was enough to keep Chris from killing himself, it was enough for him to slowly move towards recovery, to share what he was experiencing with others, to give them the opportunity to give him understanding and support, to feel seen and heard. A chance to start encouraging other men like him to shed their archaic armor and be vulnerable. Chris is an extraordinary human being, volunteering to take calls from people in the throes of suicidality and other psychiatric emergencies, as part of his own recovery, as a way to honor himself and his mother, as a way to give something back. We are so grateful for his strength, his creativity, his openness, and his courage; and we're excited to share this conversation with you. Please share it with someone you love; you'll be glad you did. Conversations like the ones on this podcast can sometimes be hard, but they’re always necessary. If you or someone you know is struggling, please consider visiting wannatalkaboutit.com. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call, text, or chat 988. https://recoverydiaries.org/