Advertise on podcast: Chat with Dr. Kat

If your marriage feels like a roommate relationship with your husband or wife, this episode is for you. Dr. Kat Derrig-Palumbo, licensed psychologist, walks through the 5 signs of a roommate marriage: conversations that are all logistics, no touch, planning trips but not closeness, separate emotional lives, and intimacy that quietly stopped. Then she gives you the first steps back: the honest conversation, bringing back touch, baby steps, date nights, and courting each other again. Ready to apply this to your own marriage? The Yellow Room Method: chatwithdrkat.com/yellowroom New episode every Wednesday. Website: chatwithdrkat.com I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

Living with someone who seems physically present but emotionally elsewhere can leave you lonely, devalued, and questioning what changed. The phone scrolling, flat answers, constant busyness, and sense that they always have one foot out the door can slowly turn a relationship into a place where neither person feels truly met. Dr. Kat breaks down six common signs of emotional disconnection, including going through the motions in conversation, avoiding time together, and offering little support when a partner is vulnerable. She also looks at the domino effect of ongoing neglect—and why rebuilding connection requires consistently resisting patterns of avoidance and leaning back into real engagement. If you’ve been wondering whether distance in your relationship is more than a rough patch, this conversation puts words to what daily disconnection can feel like. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When performance, money, and public opinion are all on the line, there may be nowhere to put the anxiety. College athletes are expected to compete, build a brand, handle criticism, and keep going—even after a bad game. College football coach, author, and former Penn State coach Jay Paterno talks with Dr. Kat about the human pressure behind the sport’s most visible moments. Jay explains how NIL, social media, transfers, parents, and the draft process have changed what young athletes carry. He and Dr. Kat discuss anxiety, self-medication, team culture, learning to hear constructive criticism, and the importance of a grounded support system. Jay also shares Joe Paterno’s “blue line” lesson: focus on what is in front of you, then leave it there when it’s time to return to the rest of your life. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When the truth feels unclear, your mind starts filling in the blanks—and often with the worst-case scenario. As questions about UAPs, UFOs, and possible disclosure keep circulating, uncertainty can bring fear, distrust, anger, and concern about what the future might mean for ourselves and our children. Dr. Kat looks at UAP conversations through a psychological lens, including ontological shock: the unease that comes with the possibility that our sense of reality could change. She explains why uncertainty can feel harder than bad news, how “puzzle piecing” missing information can fuel anxiety and conspiracy thinking, and how to talk about these topics with children without passing along fear. The goal isn’t to decide what is true—it’s to stay informed, grounded, and thoughtful when answers are still incomplete. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When a child is struggling with drugs, fear and shame can make families go quiet—especially when a parent is trying to help without pushing their child further away. Mary Cosby’s public grief and openness about her son’s substance use bring that private turmoil into view: the shock, the helplessness, and the instinct to keep loving someone through a crisis. Dr. Kat reflects on Mary’s response when her son disclosed his drug use, and why honest conversation can open the door to support rather than isolation. She also talks about the many ways people grieve, the coping skills that help people carry an unbearable loss, and concerns about today’s high-potency cannabis, including anxiety, paranoia, and cannabis-induced psychosis. This is a compassionate conversation for anyone carrying worry, loss, or silence in their own family. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

Surviving addiction, grief, illness, or loss doesn’t automatically make life feel better. Sometimes you make it through the crisis only to find yourself exhausted, grieving what’s gone, and wondering how to rebuild without simply waiting for the next thing to fall apart. Andrew Minuto, author of Fatally Resilient, shares what it has meant to keep starting over after addiction, the deaths of his parents, divorce, and recurring cancer. Dr. Kat and Andrew talk honestly about trauma’s physical triggers, why substances can be about relief rather than pleasure, and the difference between blaming yourself and taking accountability. They also explore EMDR, grief, small daily victories, and returning to the hopes and “fantasies” that give life direction. For anyone asking, “I survived—now what?” this conversation makes room for both exhaustion and the choice to keep building. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

Splitting the bill can sound fair—until you notice that the cost of a date often starts long before anyone reaches the restaurant. Women are navigating pay gaps, pressure to look a certain way, and safety calculations that can shape everything from what they wear to how they get home. Dr. Kat looks beyond the 50/50 debate at the hidden financial, emotional, and practical costs women carry. She talks about the pressure created by beauty standards, the everyday vigilance many women are taught around personal safety, and why focusing only on the check can become a form of cherry-picking. A story about a school dance offers a simple example of what it can look like to recognize the fuller picture. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When you’ve tried therapy, medication, and all the usual advice but still feel stuck, it can be hard to know what else is worth considering. Dr. Kat talks with Myriam Barthes, co-founder and CEO of Journey Clinical, about ketamine-assisted psychotherapy—not as a shortcut or a “magic pill,” but as a treatment option that combines medicine with an ongoing therapeutic relationship. They break down the practical side of psychedelic-assisted therapy: medical eligibility screening, therapist training, preparation, dosing sessions, and integration afterward. You’ll hear why difficult or anxious moments during treatment are not necessarily “bad trips,” how safety and trust shape the experience, and why the work continues long after a session ends. For anyone wondering whether feeling stuck means they’ve run out of options, this conversation offers a more grounded way to think about what support can look like. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When someone betrays or humiliates you, forgiveness can feel like being asked to pretend it never happened. But holding onto the anger can keep you tied to the person long after the relationship is over—especially when you find yourself choosing the same painful dynamic with a different face. Dr. Kat offers a “three boxes” way to separate what they did, your own accountability, and the forgiveness that helps you release the emotional grip of the past. She explains why forgiving someone does not mean excusing them, forgetting, or returning to the relationship—and why forgiving yourself matters when you recognize a pattern of hoping you can change someone. It’s a conversation for anyone ready to stop revisiting old hurt and make different choices going forward. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When intimacy fades in a marriage, it can feel like being “put out to pasture”—still carrying the daily responsibilities, but no longer touched, noticed, or treated like a priority. And when you finally say you feel unloved or unappreciated, a defensive response can make the distance feel even worse. Dr. Kat unpacks her Cow Theory: how couples become disconnected, why resentment can make affection hard to receive even when it’s finally offered, and how consistency helps rebuild trust over time. She also connects this pattern to the Yellow Room, where partners may feel that nothing they say or do matters. This is a candid look at how to respond with compassion, stop seeking fulfillment outside the relationship, and find your way back to each other. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When someone you love pulls away — a grown child, a partner, a parent — the easy explanation is to blame a therapist who told them to leave, or call someone a narcissist because a checklist on TikTok said so. But the real story is almost always messier and more human than that. Dr. Kat breaks down what's actually driving parental and partner alienation, from social media's oversimplified diagnostic labels to the damage a divorcing parent can do by turning children against the other side. She talks about why most of us would meet at least a few criteria on those "narcissistic parent" lists, what therapists should actually be doing with options instead of directives, and why people don't leave relationships because of therapy — they leave because they finally had a space to say what they'd been feeling all along. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When someone knows exactly how to get under your skin — especially through your kids — co-parenting becomes less about logistics and more about survival. Simi Krishnan, a data scientist and author, joins Dr. Kat to talk openly about leaving an 18-year marriage, rebuilding her health and identity, and learning to co-parent with someone who still wants control. Dr. Kat reframes the challenge: stop being shocked by bad behavior and start being shocked by the good. She walks through practical tools — writing down every trigger so it loses its power, thanking the universe for each reminder that leaving was the right call, and choosing co-parenting apps that coach communication rather than just flagging conflict. There's also an honest conversation about forgiveness as self-protection, not grace for the other person, and why strong people are often the easiest to trigger. If you're co-parenting with someone who won't change, this one's worth your time. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

Somewhere along the way, one person in the relationship kept going — to the gym, to golf, to lunch with friends — while the other quietly stopped. Not because they wanted to, but because someone had to hold everything together. And now, years into parenthood, there's a low-grade resentment that didn't arrive all at once. It crept in, unnoticed, while one partner's life stayed largely intact and the other's slowly disappeared into the household. Dr. Kat unpacks why this imbalance happens so gradually that neither partner fully sees it forming — and why the person who lost the most often ends up waiting for *permission* to reclaim something that was always theirs. She offers a grounded, step-by-step approach: writing down what you want (pen to paper, not your phone), naming a timeline, and bringing that list into the conversation with the same confidence your partner never had to think twice about. She also talks honestly about what pushback means — and what a healthy response actually sounds like. If you've been running the household on empty and aren't sure how to start asking for more, this one is worth your time. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

Parenting a child with ADHD can feel like you're failing every single day — the meltdowns, the walking on eggshells, the guilt at bedtime — even when you're trying everything you've been told to try. Dr. Kat talks with Dana Kay, board certified holistic health and nutrition practitioner and founder of the ADHD Thrive Institute, who came to this work not as a professional first, but as a mom whose young son was headed toward a fourth medication before she started asking different questions. The conversation moves through what those different questions actually look like in practice: how ADHD symptoms can be signals of internal stress rather than just a brain disorder, why the gut-brain connection matters more than most families are told, what Dana calls the "trash can" analogy for understanding a child's cumulative toxic load, and where supplements like magnesium, omega-3s, and vitamin D fit in — and where they don't. Dr. Kat adds her own clinical experience, including a child whose ADHD symptoms disappeared once a wheat and dairy sensitivity was identified. Whether your child was diagnosed last year or you've been managing this for a decade, this episode offers a way to think about the whole picture that most appointments never get to. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/

When you lose someone to sudden violence, the mind doesn't know what to do with that much pain — so sometimes you just try to drown it. LaShawnda lost her 21-year-old son Tyshawn to a random shooting in Cleveland in January 2023, eight days before his birthday. For roughly a hundred days after, she drank a fifth of tequila daily, lost sixty pounds, and — by her own honest account — barely knew how she was getting through each day. It was Tyshawn's dog, visibly wasting away, that finally broke through. Dr. Kat and LaShawnda talk through what grief actually looks like when it has no clean edges — the anger directed at the person you lost, the numbness that can look like functioning, and the slow erosion of a sense of self. Dr. Kat walks through how the brain attaches to pain as a form of problem-solving, why grief can make you feel like you've lost all agency, and how rebuilding starts not with healing but with small, deliberate choices. If you've ever found yourself just existing rather than living, this conversation will feel familiar. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/