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What happens when you turn your most personal struggles into a mission to help others find hope, healing, and belonging? One year, 52 episodes, and countless conversations later, You Can Be Both is celebrating its first anniversary! In this special episode, Lauren Lanzaretta looks back at why she started this podcast, what she's learned along the way, the conversations that changed her life, and what's coming next.Lauren opens up about growing up evangelical, discovering she was gay, spending years in the closet, and the journey that led her to reconcile her faith and sexuality. She shares why she created You Can Be Both for LGBTQ+ people of faith who feel isolated, rejected, or afraid that being gay means losing their relationship with God.Together, we look back at some of the most powerful conversations from the past year, including emotional moments, theological discoveries, stories of religious trauma, and voices that are changing the conversation around LGBTQ+ identity and Christianity.IN THIS EPISODE:🌈 Why Lauren started You Can Be Both and the story behind its launch❤️ Growing up evangelical Christian and struggling with her sexuality💔 Spending years in the closet and the impact of religious shame🙏 How Lauren reconciled being gay and Christian📖 What we've learned about Scripture, theology, and the LGBTQ+ community⛪ Challenging traditional interpretations of the Bible and the so-called clobber verses🧠 Understanding religious trauma and its impact on mental health and relationships🏳️‍⚧️ Learning from LGBTQ+ voices and understanding the trans experience💬 The importance of affirming churches, allies, and supportive families😭 The most emotional moments from our conversations with guests🎤 Lauren's TOP 5 favorite episodes from the past year✨ What's next for You Can Be Both, including new resources, coaching, community events, and more!WHY THIS MISSION MATTERS:You Can Be Both was created for the person who feels alone. The person questioning everything they've been taught. The person afraid of going to hell, struggling with religious trauma, or wondering if they can ever feel fully accepted by God and their community.If that's you, I want you to know something: You are not alone. Your story matters. You don't have to hide who you are to have a relationship with God.And this is only the beginning. We're growing our community, developing new resources, bringing in more experts and guests, and creating opportunities for LGBTQ+ people of faith to connect, heal, and thrive.ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTH:You Can Be Both is a podcast and community for LGBTQ+ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, we explore LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and what it means to embrace both faith and sexuality.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY:https://youcanbeboth.com/community❤️ SUPPORT THE MISSION:Help us continue creating content, resources, and community for LGBTQ+ people of faith. Your support helps us reach more people who need to know they aren't alone.https://donorbox.org/support-the-mission-978622🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC:https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5💬 JOIN THE CONVERSATION:What has been your favorite You Can Be Both episode over the past year? What have you learned? And what topics or guests would you like to see in the future? Let us know in the comments!If this podcast has impacted your life, please subscribe, like, and share this episode with someone who needs to hear this message.You can be LGBTQ+. You can have faith. You can question everything. And you can be both. 🌈❤️#YouCanBeBoth #GayChristian #LGBTQChristian #LGBTQFaith #ChristianPodcast #ReligiousTrauma #ChristianDeconstruction #GayAndChristian #FaithAndSexuality #QueerChristian #LGBTQPodcast #AffirmingChristianity #ReligiousDeconstruction #LGBTQ #QueerFaith #Christianity

What happens when a successful Christian music artist begins questioning the beliefs she's expected to represent, discovers she's gay, and realizes she can no longer participate in an industry that doesn't reflect who she is? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with singer-songwriter Jennifer Knapp to discuss coming out as gay, her experience in contemporary Christian music, religious deconstruction, LGBTQ+ identity, and what it means to reclaim your faith and find your voice.Jennifer shares her journey from growing up in Kansas and entering the Christian music industry to becoming one of the first prominent Christian recording artists to publicly come out as gay. She opens up about the pressure to conform to evangelical expectations, the impact of purity culture, and why she ultimately walked away from Christian music. She also explores the complicated relationship between faith and sexuality, challenging traditional interpretations of Christianity, and why our personal experiences should matter when shaping our spiritual beliefs.In this episode:🌈 Jennifer's journey into contemporary Christian music and becoming a recording artist🎤 What it was like being a successful artist in the Christian music industry❤️ Discovering her sexuality and coming out as gay💔 Why Jennifer walked away from Christian music in 2002⛪ The pressure of evangelical Christianity and traditional gender roles🔥 The True Love Waits movement & purity culture📖 Deconstructing Christianity and questioning traditional theology🧠 Why your personal experiences matter in your spiritual journey🏳️‍🌈 The reality of LGBTQ+ Christians finding affirming faith communities💬 Why being gay and Christian shouldn't be a contradiction🙏 Does Jennifer Knapp still consider herself a Christian?🎶 Finding her voice again and returning to music✨ Why everyone has a theology, even if they don't believe in GodJennifer's story is a powerful reminder that faith doesn't have to mean conformity, and that questioning what you've been taught doesn't mean abandoning everything you believe. You can challenge religious teachings, embrace your identity, and create a spiritual life that reflects your own experiences, values, and understanding of the world.You don't have to let someone else define your relationship with God, your sexuality, or your place in the Christian community. And LGBTQ+ people aren't outsiders to the faith. We've always been here, contributing, loving, leading, and shaping the communities we're part of.You can be LGBTQ+. You can have faith. You can question everything. And you can be both. 🌈❤️ABOUT JENNIFER: https://jenniferknapp.com/ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTH:You Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and faith.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY: youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5✨ LEARN MORE: youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, subscribe, comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. ❤️#YouCanBeBoth #JenniferKnapp #GayChristian #LGBTQChristian #ChristianMusic #ComingOut #ReligiousDeconstruction #ChristianDeconstruction #LGBTQFaith #FaithAndSexuality #QueerChristian #LGBTQ #ChristianPodcast #LGBTQPodcast #ReligiousTrauma #PurityCulture #AffirmingChristian #GayChristians #QueerFaith #Christianity

What happens when a queer therapist who grew up in a nontraditional family enters the Christian church, questions everything she was taught about sexuality, and discovers the lasting impact of religious trauma? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Ann Russo, licensed clinical social worker, theologian, and creator of the Religious Trauma Treatment Model, to discuss LGBTQ+ identity, Christian deconstruction, purity culture, and healing from religious trauma. Ann shares her journey from attending evangelical churches and studying theology to becoming a therapist who helps people navigate the complicated relationship between faith, sexuality, and mental health. She also explains how high-control religion can impact self-worth, relationships, and sexual expression—and why healing doesn't have to mean abandoning your faith.In this episode:🌈 Growing up in a queer, nontraditional family in the 80s & 90s✝️ Can you be LGBTQ+ and Christian?💔 How religious trauma and rejection affect mental health📖 What does the Bible actually say about homosexuality?🧠 Signs you may have experienced religious trauma⛪ High-control religion, church culture, and deconstruction❤️ How to heal while maintaining your faith🔥 Purity culture, sexual shame, and sexual empowerment💬 How to begin healing from harmful religious teachings🫶 Coming out to your family with confidence and self-acceptance✨ The Religious Trauma Treatment Model and finding your own pathAnn's story and clinical work offer a powerful reminder that you don't have to choose between your identity and your faith. You can question the teachings that hurt you, explore what you genuinely believe, and learn to trust yourself again. Healing is a process, and you deserve the freedom to define your values, your sexuality, and your spiritual journey without shame or fear. 🌈❤️You can be LGBTQ+. You can be Christian. And you can be both.MORE ABOUT ANN:https://www.amrtherapy.com/ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTHYou Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and faith.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY: youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5✨ LEARN MORE: youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, subscribe, comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. ❤️#YouCanBeBoth #AnnRusso #ReligiousTrauma #GayChristian #LGBTQChristian #LGBTQ #QueerChristian #ChristianDeconstruction #ReligiousTraumaHealing #PurityCulture #SexualShame #AffirmingChristian #LGBTQFaith #ChristianPodcast #LGBTQPodcast #QueerTheology #GayChristians #FaithAndSexuality #ChurchHurt #Deconstruction

What happens when a gay man raised in an evangelical missionary family leaves Christianity, then starts asking questions about God again? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with comedian, actor, and writer Matt LeGrande to discuss being gay and Christian, deconstruction, family, and finding a personal understanding of faith.Matt shares why he stepped away from the church and how he is exploring spirituality, rereading the Bible, and questioning beliefs he once accepted. He also opens up about the pain of knowing his mother believes he is going to hell because he is gay—and how he continues to approach their relationship with love, honesty, and a willingness to seek truth.In this episode:🌈 Growing up gay in an evangelical missionary family✝️ Can you be gay and Christian?💔 When a parent believes you’re going to hell📖 Rereading the Bible and asking questions🧠 Christian deconstruction and questioning what you were taught🙏 Leaving the church and finding your way back to God❤️ Loving family members when you disagree about faith💬 Why seeking truth matters more than being right😂 Comedy, religion, and spirituality✨ Exploring faith with an open mindMatt’s story is a reminder that faith journeys aren’t always linear. You can question what you were taught, step away from religion, and remain curious about God. You can love your family while being honest about who you are, and you don’t have to abandon your identity to explore faith. 🌈❤️You can be LGBTQ+. You can be Christian. And you can be both.ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTHYou Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and faith.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY: youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5✨ LEARN MORE: youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, subscribe, comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. ❤️#YouCanBeBoth, #MattLeGrande, #GayChristian, #LGBTQChristian, #LGBTQ, #QueerChristian, #ChristianDeconstruction, #ReligiousTrauma, #AffirmingChristian, #LGBTQFaith, #ChristianPodcast, #LGBTQPodcast, #QueerTheology, #GayChristians, #LGBTQCommunity, #Christianity, #FaithAndSexuality

What happens when one of the most well-known gay Christian voices becomes the target of criticism from within the LGBTQ+ community? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with Matthew Vines to address the controversy surrounding his New York Times article, “I’m Gay, Not Queer. It Matters.” Matthew responds directly to the criticism that he is too conservative, too focused on acceptance, or trying to conform LGBTQ+ people to traditional Christian values. He explains what he actually meant, why he believes LGBTQ people should be free to think for themselves, and why being gay shouldn't come with a predetermined political, sexual, or ideological worldview.In this episode:🔥 Matthew responds to the backlash over his New York Times article🏳️‍🌈 “I’m Gay, Not Queer” — what Matthew actually meant✝️ LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity & affirming theology🧠 Queer theory vs. affirming theology💬 Why being LGBTQ+ shouldn't dictate what you believe❤️‍🩹 Can LGBTQ+ people be more conventional without being “less queer”?💍 Monogamy, marriage & sexual ethics🔥 Why Matthew says LGBTQ+ people shouldn't be pressured to conform🗣️ The importance of disagreement, debate & freedom within the LGBTQ+ community✨ Finding a middle ground between faith, identity and freedomMatthew also addresses one of the biggest questions surrounding the controversy: Can LGBTQ+ people be fully accepted without all believing the same things? His answer is a powerful argument for allowing LGBTQ+ people the freedom to define themselves, their relationships, their beliefs, and their faith for themselves. 🌈❤️You can be LGBTQ+. You can be Christian. And you can be both.ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTHYou Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and faith.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY:youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC:https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5✨ LEARN MORE:youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, subscribe, comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. ❤️#YouCanBeBoth, #MatthewVines, #GayChristian, #LGBTQChristian, #LGBTQ, #QueerChristian, #ChristianDeconstruction, #ReligiousTrauma, #AffirmingChristian, #LGBTQFaith, #ChristianPodcast, #LGBTQPodcast, #QueerTheology, #GayChristians, #LGBTQCommunity, #Christianity, #FaithAndSexuality

What happens when you start questioning everything you were taught about God, Christianity, women, relationships, and your own identity? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with Hope with Holly to talk about Christian nationalism, religious trauma, deconstruction, patriarchy, relationships, and finding the freedom to become your authentic self.Holly spent years deeply involved in evangelical Christianity and eventually began questioning the fundamentalist beliefs she had been taught. Today, she helps people heal from religious and relationship abuse, build healthier boundaries, and reclaim their identity.In this episode:🔥 Christian nationalism & fundamentalist Christianity✝️ Questioning everything you were taught about God💔 Religious trauma, shame & spiritual abuse🧠 Deconstructing Christianity & rebuilding your beliefs👩‍🦰 Women, patriarchy & purity culture🏳️‍🌈 LGBTQ+ people of faith & religious trauma❤️‍🩹 Healing, boundaries & learning to trust yourself✨ Finding freedom and living as your authentic self💛 Why you don't have to prove your worth to anyoneHolly also shares a powerful message for LGBTQ+ people of faith: you are worthy, you belong here, and you don't have to choose between authenticity and love. 🌈❤️You can be LGBTQ+. You can be Christian. And you can be both.ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTHYou Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and faith.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY: youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5✨ LEARN MORE: youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, subscribe, comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. ❤️#YouCanBeBoth, #HopeWithHolly, #ChristianDeconstruction, #ReligiousTrauma, #ChristianNationalism, #LGBTQChristian, #LGBTQChristians, #GayChristian, #QueerChristian, #LGBTQFaith, #DeconstructingChristianity, #Exvangelical, #ReligiousAbuse, #SpiritualAbuse, #LGBTQHealing, #LGBTQPodcast, #ChristianPodcast

Can you really change your sexual orientation? And why is same-sex attraction “unwanted” anyways?In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren takes a deeper look at the “ex-gay” movement and the idea of “unwanted same-sex attraction.” She explores the difference between sexual orientation, trauma, shame, self-destructive behavior, and healing—and asks whether the goal should be changing your sexuality or actually healing from the experiences that shaped how you see yourself.Lauren also talks about religious trauma, internalized shame, the pressure LGBTQ+ Christians can feel to reject their sexuality, and the belief that you have to choose between being LGBTQ+ and having a relationship with God.In this episode:🏳️‍🌈 Being LGBTQ+ and Christian ✝️💭 “Unwanted same-sex attraction”💔 The “ex-gay” movement🧠 Sexual orientation, trauma & shame🙏 Can you change your sexual orientation?📖 Christianity, homosexuality & judgment❤️‍🩹 Healing vs. changing who you are⛪ Religious trauma and internalized shame🌱 Learning to live from love instead of fear❤️ Finding peace with God as an LGBTQ+ ChristianIf you’ve ever been told that being gay means you’re separated from God, this conversation is for you. 🌈❤️You can be LGBTQ+. You can be Christian. And you can be both.ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTHYou Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and what it means to know that you can be both.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY:youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC:https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5Cnw4wOsCyYeVHzAif?si=UQLfKf5lTq6Zlx1BspX1lw&nd=1&dlsi=72b0ad4c14024c0c✨ LEARN MORE:youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, subscribe, comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear that *you don't have to choose between who you are and your relationship with God.*#YouCanBeBoth, #UnwantedSameSexAttraction, #SameSexAttraction, #ExGay, #ExGayMovement, #GayChristian, #LGBTQChristian, #LGBTQChristians, #ChristianAndGay, #ReligiousTrauma, #LGBTQFaith, #FaithAndSexuality, #ConversionTherapy, #GayChristians, #QueerChristian, #ChristianityAndLGBTQ, #LGBTQHealing, #DeconstructingChristianity, #LGBTQPodcast, #ChristianPodcast

What happens when you’re gay, you love Jesus, and you’ve spent years believing those two things can’t coexist?In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with Brian Nietzel, LGBTQ+ advocate and co-founder of Renovus and the Making Things Right project, for an honest conversation about faith, sexuality, family, and finding peace with God.Brian shares his journey from conservative Christianity and years of celibacy to coming out, wrestling with Scripture, and realizing he didn't have to choose between being gay and following Jesus.They talk about coming out to his family, religious trauma, the “ex-gay” movement, deconstructing faith, LGBTQ+ Christians and conservative evangelicals, and whether it's possible to bridge the divide.Brian also shares why LGBTQ+ people don't have to be bridge builders—and how rediscovering the heart of Jesus helped him find freedom in his faith.In this episode:🏳️‍🌈 Being LGBTQ+ and Christian✝️ Faith and sexuality💔 The “ex-gay” movement📖 The Bible and homosexuality👨‍👩‍👦 Coming out to family🤝 LGBTQ+ Christians and evangelicals🌱 Deconstructing faith❤️ Finding peace with GodABOUT BRIAN NIETZELBrian Neitzel is a longtime advocate helping Christians and churches move beyond doctrinal debates toward more thoughtful conversations around LGBTQ+ issues. He co-founded Renovatus in 2019 and launched the Making Things Right project in 2021.ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTHYou Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and what it means to know that you can be both.🌈 JOIN THE COMMUNITY:youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC:https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5Cnw4wOsCyYeVHzAif?si=UQLfKf5lTq6Zlx1BspX1lw✨ LEARN MORE:youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, subscribe, comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear that **you don't have to choose between who you are and your relationship with God.**#GayChristian, #LGBTQChristian, #LGBTQFaith, #GayAndChristian, #ReligiousTrauma, #Deconstruction, #ExGay, #LGBTQChristians, #QueerChristian, #FaithAndSexuality, #BibleAndLGBTQ, #YouCanBeBoth, #BrianNeitzel

What makes a healthy lesbian relationship work? How do you navigate communication, conflict, intimacy, and keeping the spark alive? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with Dr. Lorri Sulpizio, a leadership psychologist, relationship coach, and director of the Conscious Leadership Academy at the University of San Diego, for an honest conversation about lesbian relationships—the good, the bad, and the ugly.They discuss dating, attachment, boundaries, relationship trauma, navigating exes, codependency versus healthy interdependence, maintaining individuality, and becoming a healthier partner.And yes—we talk about sex, desire, body confidence, romance, and whether lesbian bed death is real. ❤️‍🔥For LGBTQ+ people of faith, they also explore how religious shame can impact our relationship with our bodies, sexuality, and self-worth—and how we can begin unlearning those messages. Whether you’re single, dating, or in a long-term relationship, this episode offers encouragement and practical insight for building love rooted in trust, communication, authenticity, and joy. 🌈 In this episode, we talk about: 🏳️‍🌈 Lesbian relationships 💗 Healthy relationships and dating 🚩 Red flags and green flags 🧠 Trauma and relationship patterns 💬 Communication and conflict 🤝 Codependency vs. healthy interdependence 👩‍❤️‍👩 Navigating exes 🌱 Maintaining individuality 🔥 Romance, intimacy, and desire 💋 Is lesbian bed death real? ❤️ Body confidence and sexuality ✝️ Religious shame and LGBTQ+ identity About Dr. Lorri Sulpizio Dr. Lorri Sulpizio is a leadership psychologist, executive and relationship coach, and director of the Conscious Leadership Academy at the University of San Diego. She works with individuals, couples, teams, and organizations to build stronger relationships, healthier cultures, and greater confidence.🎧 Subscribe to You Can Be Both for more conversations about faith, sexuality, relationships, healing, and authenticity. ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTH You Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and what it means to know that you can be both. 🌈 JOIN THE YOU CAN BE BOTH COMMUNITY: youcanbeboth.com/community 🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5Cnw4wOsCyYeVHzAif?si=UQLfKf5lTq6Zlx1BspX1lw ✨ LEARN MORE: youcanbeboth.com If this episode connected with you, subscribe, leave a comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear that they don't have to choose between who they are and their relationship with God. #GayChristian #LGBTQChristian #GayCouple #Christianity #LGBTQFaith #GayAndChristian #ReligiousTrauma #ConversionTherapy #AffirmingChurch #YouCanBeBoth #LesbianRelationships #LesbianDating #HealthyRelationships #LGBTQRelationships #LesbianLove #QueerRelationships #RelationshipAdvice #LesbianBedDeath #LGBTQWomen #RelationshipCoach #RelationshipTrauma #EmotionalIntimacy #LGBTQFaith #ReligiousTrauma #YouCanBeBoth

What happens when two gay Christian men fall in love—but one of them is a pastor?In this deeply personal episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with Kade Rogers and Dr. Greg Neal, a married gay Christian couple whose journey brings together love, faith, coming out, church, and the struggle to live authentically.Greg is an ordained pastor and theologian who spent years wrestling with his sexuality, faith, and the fear of what coming out could mean for his ministry. Kade came from a very different background, but when the two met, a friendship unexpectedly grew into love.Their relationship challenged everything they thought they knew about faith, identity, and what it means to truly live openly. Together, they navigated the difficult realities of being a gay couple within the church while holding onto their love for God and each other.Their story is ultimately about love, courage, faith, and finding a way to belong without hiding who you are.In this conversation, we talk about:❤️ Their love story and how they met✝️ Being gay and Christian💍 Same-sex marriage and faith🏳️‍🌈 Coming out later in life⛪ Church hurt and religious trauma📖 What the Bible actually says about homosexuality💔 Conversion therapy and its lasting impact🔥 Facing hatred from other Christians🙏 Finding an affirming church🌈 What it really means for a church to be LGBTQ affirming❤️ Choosing love instead of fear🫂 Creating a church where LGBTQ people truly belongIf you've ever wondered whether you can be gay, Christian, and fully yourself, I hope this conversation reminds you:You don't have to choose between who you are and your relationship with God.You can be both.Subscribe to You Can Be Both for more honest conversations about LGBTQ identity, Christianity, healing, faith, and belonging.ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTHYou Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and what it means to know that you can be both.🌈 JOIN THE YOU CAN BE BOTH COMMUNITY:youcanbeboth.com/community🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC:https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5Cnw4wOsCyYeVHzAif?si=Uq3s_dhUTXmZmTsHxneDTA✨ LEARN MORE:youcanbeboth.comIf this episode connected with you, follow, leave a comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear that they don't have to choose between who they are and their relationship with God.#GayChristian #LGBTQChristian #GayCouple #Christianity #LGBTQFaith #GayAndChristian #ReligiousTrauma #ConversionTherapy #AffirmingChurch #YouCanBeBoth

What happens when you're told you can't be gay AND have a relationship with God? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with professional MMA and bare-knuckle fighter Miranda Barber for an honest conversation about being lesbian, Christian, family rejection, relationships, faith, and finding your purpose. Miranda shares her story of coming out as a teenager, leaving home at 17, finding her identity in Christ, and learning not to let other people's opinions determine her relationship with God.She also talks about her career as a fighter, toxic relationships, resilience, and why she believes her fight is about so much more than what's happening inside the ring. This episode is for you if: • You struggle with being gay and Christian • You've been told your sexuality separates you from God • You've experienced rejection from your family or church • You're questioning whether you can be LGBTQ and still have faith • You're a gay Christian healing from religious trauma • You've struggled with toxic relationships or finding your worth • You want to hear an LGBTQ Christian perspective that is honest, hopeful, and unapologetic 🥊 MIRANDA'S NEXT FIGHT Miranda's next bare-knuckle fight is October 23, 2026 in Biloxi, Mississippi. Follow her on Instagram for updates and fight camp coverage. ABOUT MIRANDA BARBER Miranda Barber is a professional MMA and bare-knuckle fighter, coach, mentor, lesbian, and Christian. She has spent 15 years in boxing and has competed in the Professional Fighters League. ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTH You Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God.Hosted by singer-songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, the podcast explores LGBTQ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, the Bible, deconstruction, healing, and what it means to know that you can be both.🌈 JOIN THE YOU CAN BE BOTH COMMUNITY: youcanbeboth.com/community 🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3OUE5Cnw4wOsCyYeVHzAif?si=0nGICoZsTFWvhUZ9jrb_Ww ✨ LEARN MORE: youcanbeboth.com If this episode connected with you, subscribe, leave a comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear that they don't have to choose between who they are and their relationship with God. #LGBTQ, #LGBTQFaith, #GayChristian, #LesbianChristian, #ChristianLesbian, #LGBTQChristians, #YouCanBeBoth, #ReligiousTrauma, #FaithAndSexuality, #ChristianPodcast, #LGBTQPodcast, #MMA, #MMAFighter, #LesbianAthlete, #BareKnuckleBoxing, #MirandaBarber, #LaurenLanzaretta

What happens when you grow up believing there is only one path to God… and then realize that path requires you to deny who you are? In this powerful episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with Dr. Sara Glass, a psychotherapist, author, and lesbian who was raised in an ultra-Orthodox Hasidic Jewish community in Brooklyn. Sara shares what it was like growing up in a deeply religious community where girls were prepared for marriage from a young age, sexuality was heavily controlled, and questioning the rules could mean losing your family and community. She opens up about being married at 19, believing she was supposed to overcome her attraction to women, and eventually realizing that she was gay. Sara also answers one of Lauren’s biggest questions: Is Orthodox Judaism a cult? Her answer is nuanced and deeply personal. Sara explains why she believes the particular sect she was raised in met the criteria of a cult, while also emphasizing that Orthodox Jewish communities and families are not all the same. The conversation also explores religious trauma, LGBTQ identity, coming out, family rejection, deconstruction, purity culture, sexuality and religion, and whether it is possible to be both LGBTQ and Jewish. And perhaps most importantly, Sara talks about the places where LGBTQ Jews CAN find community, support, and a way to hold onto their faith without abandoning themselves. If you've ever been told you have to choose between your identity and your relationship with God, this conversation is for you. ABOUT DR. SARA GLASS Dr. Sara Glass is a psychotherapist in New York City, author of Kissing Girls on Shabbat, and a clinical expert who works with people navigating trauma, relationships, sexuality, and religious deconstruction. She also works with people leaving ultra-Orthodox communities. Sara's story offers a powerful look at what happens when religious belief, sexuality, family, and identity collide. ABOUT YOU CAN BE BOTH You Can Be Both is a podcast for LGBTQ people of faith who have been told they have to choose between being queer and believing in God. Lauren Lanzaretta created this space to remind LGBTQ people that your sexuality does not have to mean losing your faith, your spirituality, or your relationship with God. 🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC Lauren is a singer-songwriter who creates music specifically for LGBTQ people of faith. Find her music on Spotify, Apple Music, YouTube, and wherever you listen to music. 🌈 JOIN THE YOU CAN BE BOTH COMMUNITY Connect with other LGBTQ people of faith, join community conversations, attend Wellness Wednesdays, participate in book club, hear from guest speakers, and build real friendships with people who understand what you've been through. youcanbeboth.com/community ✨ LEARN MORE ABOUT LAUREN + YOU CAN BE BOTH youcanbeboth.com If this episode connected with you, subscribe to You Can Be Both, leave a comment, and share this episode with someone who needs to hear that they don't have to choose between who they are and what they believe. #LGBTQ #ReligiousTrauma #OrthodoxJudaism #LGBTQFaith #JewishLGBTQ #GayChristian #Deconstruction #ReligiousDeconstruction #LGBTQPodcast

What happens when the voice you were taught to believe was God’s voice becomes the voice telling you that you’re going to hell?In this powerful episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with licensed psychotherapist SC Nealy, an LGBTQ+ affirming therapist specializing in religious trauma, LGBTQ+ issues, and relationship counseling, to unpack what happens when faith, identity, shame, fear, and trauma become intertwined.SC shares their personal experience growing up in an ultra-conservative evangelical environment, being taught from a young age to fear LGBTQ+ identity, and eventually finding freedom in embracing who they are. SC also opens up about being kicked out of a church after coming out, navigating religious trauma, and how those experiences ultimately shaped their work as a therapist.In this conversation, we talk about:• How to recognize religious trauma• The difference between guilt and shame• How high-control religious environments can impact LGBTQ+ identity• Why LGBTQ+ people can struggle with identity exploration after religious trauma• Why the fear of hell can remain even after leaving or deconstructing from the church• How religious trauma can affect your nervous system• Why you can intellectually know something isn't true while your body still feels unsafe• Practical grounding techniques for moments of fear, shame and anxiety• The impact of being rejected by your church or family• Whether you can be LGBTQ+ AND Christian• How to separate God’s voice from the messages we’ve been taught by people• Why healing often means moving away from black-and-white thinking• How finding safe LGBTQ+ community can help with healing• What it means to stay in religion while actively challenging oppressive systems• Why SC believes we should lean into curiosity instead of certaintyOne of the most powerful moments in this conversation is when SC explains that religious trauma isn't always one huge traumatic event. For many people, it's “a thousand cuts over time” — layer upon layer of shame, fear, rejection, control and messages that teach your body it isn't safe.And if you've ever left the church, accepted your LGBTQ+ identity, or begun deconstructing your faith but still occasionally find yourself thinking:“What if they're right?”“What if I'm going to hell?”“What if I'm doing something wrong?”SC explains why those thoughts and feelings can continue long after you've intellectually rejected the beliefs that caused them — and why healing isn't always about convincing your mind. Sometimes, it's about teaching your body that you're safe.We also talk about how community can play a powerful role in healing from religious trauma, especially for LGBTQ+ people who have experienced rejection from their families or churches. As SC explains, what is broken in groups can sometimes be healed in groups.SC's book, Healing Sacred Wounds, explores religious trauma and invites readers to ask questions rather than simply accepting someone else's answers. SC's goal isn't to tell people what to believe — it's to help people examine what they've experienced and decide what they believe for themselves.If you've experienced religious trauma, church hurt, spiritual abuse, Christian deconstruction, LGBTQ+ rejection, fear of hell, shame surrounding your identity, or confusion about how your faith and sexuality can coexist, this episode is for you.You don't have to choose between who you are and your relationship with God.🌈 JOIN THE YOU CAN BE BOTH COMMUNITYA safe community for LGBTQ+ people of faith:YouCanBeBoth.com/community📖 SC Nealy's book — Healing Sacred WoundsLearn more at lgbtcounselingdmv.com/healing-sacred-wounds🎙️ Subscribe to You Can Be Both for conversations about LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, religious trauma, deconstruction, faith, healing, and learning that you really can be both.If this episode speaks to you, like, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs to hear this.#YouCanBeBoth

Is street preaching actually biblical — or is it pushing people further away from Jesus? In this episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren Lanzaretta takes a deeper look at street preachers, aggressive evangelism, and the Christians who show up at Pride events with signs of condemnation. After several uncomfortable encounters with street evangelists herself, Lauren asks an important question: Is this really how Jesus taught Christians to reach people? We look at what the Bible actually says about evangelism, how Jesus treated people, religious hypocrisy, the psychology behind why forceful preaching can create resistance, and research suggesting people are far more receptive to conversations about faith through genuine relationships than strangers preaching at them on the street. Lauren also explores the culture surrounding aggressive street preaching, masculinity, authority, religious fundamentalism, and why confronting street preachers can sometimes reinforce their belief that they are being persecuted for telling “the truth.” For LGBTQ+ people who have already experienced rejection, discrimination, and religious trauma, being confronted with condemnation at Pride or in public spaces can be especially painful. So how should LGBTQ+ Christians respond? Maybe the most powerful form of evangelism isn’t yelling louder. Maybe it’s loving people. Serving people. Knowing people. Listening to people. And allowing our lives to demonstrate the love of Jesus before our words ever do. 🌈 **Join the You Can Be Both community for LGBTQ+ people of faith:** youcanbeboth.com/community 🎙️ Subscribe for weekly conversations about LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, faith, religious trauma, deconstruction, healing, and what it means to know that **you can be both.**

What should Christian parents do when their child comes out as gay, transgender, or nonbinary? In this deeply personal episode of You Can Be Both, Lauren sits down with Shari Bruck—a mother of two LGBTQ+ children—to discuss faith deconstruction, religious fear, unconditional love, and what it truly means to support your child. Raised in a strict Catholic family, Shari grew up surrounded by religious shame, guilt, patriarchy, and the belief that there was only one acceptable path to God. As she began questioning those teachings, she developed a spirituality rooted not in fear or control, but in love, curiosity, acceptance, and our shared humanity. Years later, both of Shari’s children came out—Taylor as gay and Riley as LGBTQ+, gender-nonconforming, and using they/them pronouns. Shari shares honestly about what came naturally, what required learning, the mistakes she has made, and why parents do not need to understand everything about their child’s identity in order to love and respect them. This conversation explores: • How parents should respond when their child comes out • Why being LGBTQ+ is not a choice • Learning to use they/them pronouns • Supporting a nonbinary or gender-nonconforming child • Deconstructing harmful religious beliefs • The damage caused by shame, rejection, and religious fear • Why rejecting your LGBTQ child will not change who they are • Finding chosen family when your biological family does not accept you • Choosing love even when you do not fully understand As Shari powerfully explains, your child is still the same person you have always known and loved. Coming out does not change them—it allows you to know them more honestly and deeply. “You’re not going to pray the gay away. You’re not going to ostracize the gay away.” For every Christian parent struggling to understand their LGBTQ+ child, this episode offers a simple place to begin: pause, listen, ask questions, keep your heart open, and default to love. If your family has rejected you because of your sexuality or gender identity, please remember: you are worthy of love, you are not alone, and there are people who will accept you exactly as you are. Join the You Can Be Both Community: YouCanBeBoth.com Subscribe for honest conversations about LGBTQ+ identity, Christianity, faith deconstruction, religious trauma, healing, inclusion, and discovering that you truly can be both. CHAPTERS: 00:00 Meet Shari Bruck 00:43 Growing up in strict Catholicism 02:38 Deconstructing religion and redefining spirituality 07:31 Creating a home where children feel safe 10:24 When Taylor came out as gay 15:16 Loving LGBTQ children without shame 23:50 Learning about nonbinary identity and they/them pronouns 31:19 Why parents should “default to love” 36:05 How to respond when your child comes out 40:37 Religious fear versus your child’s truth 45:08 Accepting yourself and finding chosen family 48:29 Let love be your guiding principle #LGBTQChristian #ChristianParents #YouCanBeBoth