Advertise on podcast: Odyssey & Alchemy: Men's Inner Transformation and Depth Psychology with Martin Prihoda

Why do men who understand their patterns perfectly well still not change? Licensed mental health counselor Alexander Osterman, author of Quit Evading: A Therapist’s Field Manual for Men in Drift, explains why insight alone doesn’t change a life, and what does. In this conversation, Martin and Alex cover: What “drift” looks like in a man’s life and how to recognize itHow to start shadow work, including the “level 10 reaction” testWhy men can be both under-therapized and over-therapizedWhat real Stoicism offers that the cold-shower internet version missesPain vs. suffering, Vipassana, and Buddhist psychology meeting Stoic philosophyIdentity collapse, grief, and why holding onto an old role keeps you stuckThe chrysalis: why transformation is messy before it’s beautifulDiscipline as a built skill, tapas, and rebuilding agency with boring daily habitsThe one thing to do this week if you recognize yourself in all of thisAlex also shares his own collapse at 26 (cancer, a seven-and-a-half-year relationship ending, moving back in with his parents) and how making his bed, applying for a job and taking a walk started the rebuild. Find Alexander’s book and work at alexanderosterman.com. Chapters: 02:24 What drift looks like03:37 Why insight doesn’t lead to action04:30 Therapy vs. coaching08:57 Alex’s own collapse and the case against insight alone12:19 Why Jung14:41 Are men over-therapized?17:20 How to start shadow work23:38 Real Stoicism vs. internet Stoicism26:21 Pain, suffering and Vipassana33:37 “Condemned to be free”36:35 What avoidance protects, and identity41:57 Grief and identity collapse45:45 The chrysalis48:16 Discipline and tapas50:15 Working with men vs. women51:16 Rebuilding agency day to day52:23 One thing to do this week

What if the thing sabotaging your next big move isn't fear — it's a security guard who's been on duty since childhood? Dr. Julie Gowthorpe is a registered social worker and founder of Gowthorpe Therapists in Ontario, where she and her team provide trauma-informed care for individuals, couples, and families — including specialized work with police, military members, and First Nations communities navigating intergenerational trauma. Her new book, Heal Childhood Trauma, lays out what she calls self-nurturing therapy: learning to become the parent your inner child never had. In this conversation we explore inner transformation through the lens of attachment and the body — the four attachment styles formed in childhood and how they quietly run your adult relationships, why nervous system regulation (not willpower) is what actually lets someone stop bypassing pain through alcohol, humor, or compulsive behavior, the ACE study and how early trauma shows up decades later at the cellular level, why men specifically tend to be "fine, fine, fine — until they're not," and how intergenerational trauma gets passed down through parents who were never taught how to nurture in the first place. Martin and Julie also get into the Buddhist metaphor of the two bags we carry — one full of everyone else's shortcomings, one full of our own we can't see — and why your "villains" are often the clearest mirror into your own unhealed parts. This is a conversation about what's actually on the other side of doing this work: not happiness, but freedom — the kind where your shoulders drop and you trust yourself to respond with wisdom instead of react from fear. https://drjuliegowthorpersw.com/ If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more people find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

What if connecting to the divine wasn't a mystery — just a signal you'd never learned to turn on? Taras Machula is a certified hypnotherapist who works in the subconscious, treating addiction, trauma, and grief through a method he built himself: the Temple of Divinity. He calls hypnosis a "super highway" to the higher self — and midway through this conversation, he takes Martin through a live, five-minute distance healing on air. In this conversation we explore inner transformation through the lens of the subconscious mind — the separation between the ego (the part of you managing anger, jealousy, and self-protection) and the higher self (unconditional love), why Taras believes every addiction traces back to unresolved trauma rather than moral failure, the shadow work involved in choosing which "wolf" you feed, how trauma can be released without re-living it, and what changed when Taras discovered his own life's purpose wasn't the credentials he chased, but the hearts he could help heal. This is a conversation about the parts of healing that don't show up on a whiteboard — energy, frequency, and the compassion most men have never been taught to receive, let alone give themselves. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

What if your inner critic isn't a villain — just a toddler holding a bullhorn? Peter Kenney calls himself a spiritual handyman — twenty years helping people move from stuck to unstoppable, after a spontaneous out-of-body experience during a kundalini yoga class rerouted his entire life. His book, The Inner Remodel, treats the self like a house, complete with rooms for fear, the inner critic, and the habits you've never actually stopped to look at. In this conversation we explore inner transformation through the metaphor of a house you've never actually toured — the entryway where you decide how the world sees you, the basement where everything you've buried is quietly waiting, and the room shadow work actually lives in: not a beast to be feared, but "an angry, hurt, lonely, tired, hungry aspect of yourself" that just needs to be seen. We get into the real difference between pain and suffering, why understanding beats willpower when it comes to compulsive behavior, the Eastern concept of samskaras mapped onto Western nervous system science, and what it actually means to stop trying to love yourself and instead realize you already are love. This is a conversation about redecorating from the inside out — one room at a time. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

The measure of a man isn't what he says he'll do under fire. It's what he actually does when the bullets start flying. Benjamin Lee spent his career as an EOD technician, defusing bombs on the front lines in Iraq and Afghanistan. He came home with PTSD, an opioid addiction that started with a legitimate prescription after surgery, and no idea who he was without the uniform. He rebuilt himself more than once — including through a rock bottom that involved real suicidal ideation he doesn't sugarcoat — and now runs the Initiation Source, coaching men through the same process using a framework he calls the Reforge Protocol. In this conversation we explore inner transformation through the lens of a man trained to disarm the most dangerous devices imaginable, who had to learn to disarm himself — what war actually teaches about the measure of a man, the difference between acute and chronic PTSD, the two false identities (war hero, then wounded veteran) he had to let die before he could rebuild, and the Reforge Protocol itself: reveal, examine, face, offload, reclaim, grieve, embody. We also get into Jungian shadow work, why nervous system regulation is the real first step of any of it, and what he calls "the waiting room" — the foggy, directionless space between who you were and who you're becoming. This is a conversation about learning to defuse yourself with the same discipline it takes to defuse a bomb — one wire at a time. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

What if the compulsive behavior you're ashamed of has nothing to do with being a bad man — and everything to do with a nervous system that was never allowed to regulate? Bentzy Goldman calls himself living proof it can be rebuilt. He went from addiction and suicidal depression — including an affair that nearly got him killed by a Marine sniper's fiancé's gun — to building and selling businesses. He now coaches men through the same climb using his Free Man Method, built on identity work instead of willpower or shame. In this conversation we explore inner transformation through the lens of desexualizing the brain — what pornography actually rewires in a man's expectations of sex, intimacy, and how he sees women, why willpower alone can't sustain real change and what has to replace it, the difference between managing behavior and rebuilding identity from the ground up, how nervous system regulation explains nearly every compulsive habit men carry into adulthood, and why real brotherhood — not drinking buddies — might be the piece men are actually starving for. This is a conversation about what it actually takes to stop being ruled by desire and start being free. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

What if the "terms and conditions" you've been living under were never real to begin with? Steve Barton took over his father's flower shop at 22 after a stroke sidelined him, built it into the largest in the state, and sold it right before the 2008 crash — then had an out-of-body, near-death experience in the middle of a routine therapy session that cracked his identity wide open. He's now a coach, a longtime student of A Course in Miracles, and author of The Game of Ten and the upcoming Father, the Son and the Aha Moment, co-written with his own son. In this conversation we explore inner transformation set off by something Steve never asked for — the unconscious "terms and conditions" men put on themselves ("I'll be happy when…"), why beating yourself up keeps you stuck instead of making you grow, the difference between chasing self-love and actually becoming aware, and Steve's own emotional healing ritual for letting go of fear, self-doubt, guilt, and shame. He walks Martin through his affirmation practice live on the show, and the shift is audible in real time. This isn't an episode about ego dissolution — it's one where it actually happens. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

What's left of a man when the job, the marriage, or the mask he's worn for decades finally cracks? Dr. Richard Oelberger earned the nickname "Dr. Zero" doing suicide prevention work on Skid Row alongside the LAPD — going out in the middle of the night to talk people down from the edge. A somatic psychologist and author of The Zero Method, he now runs men's groups and a twice-yearly men's retreat through the Remarkable Men's nonprofit. In this conversation we explore inner transformation through the lens of identity collapse — what actually happens in the body when a man loses the job, marriage, or role he built his entire sense of self around, why chaotic or dysregulated childhoods teach kids to become "mini parents" long before their nervous systems can handle it, the somatic tools Richard uses to release stored anger and grief, and how nervous system regulation — not willpower — is what actually lets a man change a pattern instead of just managing it. We also get into shadow work, the Sanskrit concept of samskaras, and why healing has to come before real transformation can happen. This one gets personal — Martin opens up about his own father's death by suicide, and the two find real common ground in what it costs a man to keep the mask on this long. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

A little boy told his therapist what happens to his tears when he's not allowed to cry: "They go down into my tummy, they turn into rocks, and then they come right back out and I throw them around the room." Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst is a licensed psychologist who has spent 30 years in the room with boys — and with the grown men those boys become. Her argument is simple: you can't give your son permission you've never given yourself. In this conversation we explore men's work and why the emotional range boys are born with gets narrowed by infancy — not by nature, but by us. We get into what's actually happening inside a boy the first time he's told to stop crying, why suppressed emotion resurfaces as rage, addiction, and physical illness in grown men, why teenage boys are drawn to influencers like Andrew Tate and trends like T-maxing when no one else is offering them significance, and the simple emotional healing tool — a feelings sheet, taped to the fridge — that can change how a family actually talks to its sons. This is why men die roughly ten years younger than women, why the secondary emotions of unprocessed feeling fill our jails and end half our marriages, and what it actually takes to raise a boy who doesn't have to swallow his tears. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more people find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

Willpower has a ceiling. You can out-hustle almost anything — except a nervous system that's still bracing for a threat. Dr. Alena Candova spent years being the person who had it together — capable, resilient, checking every box — without realizing she was running on survival instincts, not actual alignment. A chiropractor turned nervous system expert, she's the author of Grace Over Grit, and she works with high performers, many of them men who've built their entire identity on grit. In this conversation we explore nervous system regulation and why most self-help gets it backwards — willpower isn't the ceiling, an unregulated nervous system is. We get into how childhood emotional suppression rewires the body for hyper-vigilance, why unexpressed anger and unprocessed emotion can manifest as physical illness, the four pillars of nervous system mastery, and why real strength looks like vulnerability, not armour. This is a conversation about what's actually happening underneath the grit — and why grace, not more willpower, is what finally lets the nervous system come home. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

On March 24th, 2024, Neal Tricarico's autistic son Anthony attempted suicide. Nine weeks later, on May 25th, Anthony passed. Neal had spent 20 years in rooms with Tony Robbins and Steve Leshansky helping other people transform their lives. He thought that was the career. It turned out to be the training. He didn't perform his way through the grief. He didn't wait for closure. He built the Endurant Movement instead — an inner transformation framework for people carrying pain that never resolves, who've stopped waiting to feel better and started learning to carry it differently. In this conversation, Martin and Neal go to places most podcasts won't. Martin shares his own loss — his father's suicide when he was 21, and how that single event set him on 30 years of contemplative practice. Together they explore what grief actually is, what identity becomes when the role you built your life around gets torn out, and what's possible on the other side of the most unimaginable pain a parent can face. They go deep on: autism spectrum disorder and the devastating gap in mental health protocols for neurodiverse youth; why children with Anthony's diagnosis are nearly 30% more likely to die by suicide — and what no one is talking about; the nine weeks between Anthony's attempt and his passing, and what Neal calls the "in-between"; how a community of 75 strangers praying on Zoom carried a family through the uncarriable; Tony Robbins, post-traumatic growth, and what 20 years of transformation work actually prepares you for; mediumship, soul communication, and the decision to let Anthony go; the Endurant Method — a framework for moving from suffering to pain to purpose; the Buddhist philosophy of observing pain rather than fleeing it; and why grief is not something to complete — it's love with nowhere to go, waiting to be redirected. This is one of the most honest, most human conversations on this podcast. If you've lost someone, if you're carrying something that won't resolve, if you're trying to understand what purpose looks like after devastation — this one is for you. If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out to the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988. 🌐 Learn more about Neal's work and the Endurant Movement: https://www.endurantmovement.org/ Odyssey & Alchemy is a podcast about the journey inward and the transformation that follows — hosted by Martin Prihoda from Salt Spring Island, BC.

Most men who struggle with compulsive sexual behavior are told the same story: you're an addict, count the days, wear the chip, fail, repeat. Fran Frye doesn't buy that script — and she's built an entire practice proving why it fails. Fran is a certified sex counsellor based in Charleston who works exclusively with men on compulsive sexual behavior. She's also a sexual assault survivor, a 13-year military spouse, a rape crisis hotline volunteer, and a death doula. Her premise is direct: this isn't addiction — it's a nervous system pattern. And patterns can change. In this conversation, Martin and Fran go straight at the topics most podcasts won't touch. They explore: why compulsive sexual behavior is fundamentally a regulation problem, not a moral failure; the critical difference between sexual compulsivity and addiction — and why the distinction matters for healing; how pornography rewires desire and what getting it back actually looks like; shame as fuel rather than cure — and how to redirect that energy; why NoFap, streak trackers, and Sexaholics Anonymous set men up to fail; sexual transmutation and the Eastern philosophy of moving erotic energy through the body; what happens in a marriage when the browser history gets found; how childhood attachment patterns and religious shame drive compulsive behavior in adult men; and why the nervous system — not willpower — is the real battleground. This is one of the most honest conversations about male sexuality you'll find anywhere. No clinical hedging. No shame spiral. Just the truth about what's happening in men's bodies — and what's actually on the other side of the work. 🌐 Find Fran at: franfrye.com Odyssey & Alchemy is a podcast about the journey inward and the transformation that follows — hosted by Martin Prihoda from Salt Spring Island, BC.

What if grief isn't something you get over, but something you carry to term? Katie Rizzo is a scientist, longtime high school biology teacher, and mother of three who lost her oldest son Nicholas to an opioid overdose in 2024. Instead of looking away, she studied it — turning her research and her grief into her book, The Trimesters of Grief. In this conversation we explore emotional healing after losing a child to addiction, why grief moves in trimesters — invisible, then undeniable, then impossible to hide — the trauma and shame that keep families of addicts silent, what opioids actually do to the brain and body, and why naming the disease out loud might be the thing that saves the next kid. This is a conversation about carrying grief instead of curing it — and why the sunlight, not the silence, is what finally lets a family breathe. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more people find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now on Amazon

What happens when the mask you wear for a living starts wearing you? Bill Marchant has spent nearly four decades inside the craft of acting — on screen in Chappie and Stargate SG1, behind the camera on his own feature Everyone, and for 35 years training actors at Vancouver Film School before recently retiring from the role that shaped his life. In this conversation we explore men's inner work and the mask every man wears without noticing it, how three decades of coaching actors taught Bill to tell the difference between real vulnerability and rehearsed emotion, what Buddhism and non-attachment revealed to him about suffering, shame, and the roles men are conditioned to perform, and why the loneliest thing about masculinity is being seen for the performance instead of the person underneath it. This is a conversation about what's left when the character is gone and you're just standing there as yourself — and why that's the hardest role any man will ever play. If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now.

Happily married on Friday, divorcing on Sunday, back to normal by Tuesday. If that sounds familiar, this episode is for you. Dr. Talina Hermann is a doctor of acupuncture and Chinese medicine, clinical herbalist, and functional medicine practitioner. When conventional medicine failed to explain her own health struggles, she went looking for answers — and built a career giving them to others as founder of the Montecito Wellness Clinic. Her belief is simple: perimenopause isn't a decline, it's a turning point. And today, she's here for the men who love these women. In part one of Perimenopause for Men we explore what perimenopause actually is and why it can start as early as the late 30s, how estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone work as the nervous system's buffer — and what happens in a woman's body and mind when that buffer disappears. We get into why her labs come back "normal" when everything else says otherwise, brain fog, 3am wake-ups, and the shortened fuse, why desire shifts from spontaneous to responsive — and why so many men wrongly conclude she's falling out of love. Talina also gives men the practical playbook: what to say and what never to say, why witnessing beats fixing, why her sleep is the first thing to protect, andropause — the men's-side transition nobody talks about — and the Chinese medicine concept of the Second Spring: why this chaotic passage ends with the most empowered, unapologetic version of the woman you married. If the woman you love has changed and you've been taking it personally — this conversation will change how you see everything. Part two drops next week. Connect with Dr. Talina Hermann: [her links] If this conversation moved something in you, a rating or review helps more men find this work. Martin's book, The Weary Traveller's Guide to a Life Worth Living, is available now. — Odyssey & Alchemy is a weekly long-form interview podcast on men's inner transformation — men's work, spirituality, mindfulness, and depth psychology — hosted by Martin Prihoda, author of The Weary Traveller. Deep, unhurried conversations with therapists, teachers, yogis, and healers, for men ready to do the inner work. 📖 The Weary Traveller: [book link] 🌐 martinprihoda.com | alchemynow.ca