Advertise on podcast: Scorpio – Stoner Astrological Horoscope

Stoner Scorpio you are a resilient amazing creature.  This month will test every astrological characteristic flowing within you.  Remember your resiliency stoner Scorpio.  As waves of positive and negative charges lap at your internal beachfront, it will be your ability to plot forward toward progress that sees you through this turbulent time. Whoa, that was dramatic.  Perhaps the month won't play out like an action film, but more like a romantic comedy.  The bottom line is to prepare for wide arcs of influence from celestial bodies. Nobody knows you better than yourself, my secretive stoner Scorpion.  Stock the stash jars with a wide range of cannabis strains.  This wide selection will allow you to pack the right bud at the right moment.  Trust yourself to be your own bud tender for the month. You are the cannanaut of your own terrestrial experience.  But if I could create a guide for the month within the sacred herbal species, I would suggest: First Decade:  Energetic Sativa.  This will be a phase of learned growth.  The more energy the better! Second Decade:  Indica Dominant Hybrid.  Your stinger will be sharpest during this phase.  Blend clear communicative outpouring with measured contemplative thought. Third Decade:  High CBD Strain.  Feelings will come rushing in at this stage.  Balance and clarity of thought must stabilize your sphere. A wide range of emotions may seem daunting, but with the assistance of the sacred herb you will be able to view this month from a thirty thousand foot view.  You will emerge stronger stoner Scorpio. 

Oh stoner Scorpio, what an interesting life you live.  The final Spring month will be no different. The itch for change remains.  But universal energy is strengthening the key trait of solitude.  I had to take an extra pull on my own joint to work on this reading! Toke time for yourself in the first half of May stoner Scorpio.  Your private nature is strengthened by cosmic winds of internal contemplation.  However, with these early smoke sessions, please take note of the marijuana smoke.  Your fellow terrestrial cannanauts cannot know your intentions or plans without your communication. Yes, decisions and direction must come from internal contemplation my persnipity Scorpion; but everyone can use some guidance and assistance from their canna-crew.  Toke about it and talk about it stoner Scorpio. May is split in two by the total Lunar eclipse on the 15th. Even though the month is split, the work put into the beginning of the month will assist you at the end of the month.  Powerful energy will surround the stoner Scorpio after the Full Moon. The itch for change and the potential repression of feelings could come pouring out.  Make sure to have your stash jars loaded with Indica strains surrounding this Lunar event. Your stinger is sharp stoner Scopio.  Be careful not to injure your cannabis companions with undesired collateral damage from high energy surges during this time. The sedative nature of the Indica species might help soothe your sharp instincts, and find contemplation over attack. However, stoner Scorpio hear me now:  Switch to Sativa strains after the few days of energy overload are over.  We are meant to be in balance; the peak in energy will be followed by a valley. Wow what a month my valiant Scorpion.  Take care of others, and be sure to toke time with yourself.  Seek wisdom and balance.  Everything is going to be ok.

Stoner Scorpio change is in the air this Spring!  Turbulent cosmic winds have knocked you back and forth for what must seem like an eternity.  Important celestial movements this month will create a new period of calm that should soothe the stoner Scorpio like a mellow edible that reaches the perfect level. New beginnings my stable stoner Scorpion.  There is a bit of celestial magic operating at the dawn of April.  The New Moon rises in March and sets in April.  Pack a celebratory bowl of cannabis to welcome in this new phase early in the month. Perhaps you have been working on new beginnings in your personal life.  Agents of chaos might have slowed you down.  Breathe in the calming nature of the sacred herb.  Use your ganja gifted third eye sight to see the roadmap of destiny as it unveils before your eyes. Now is the time to use free will to progress toward your destiny stoner Scorpio. In the work sphere there is more potential for positive change.  Whether it is a project or an occupation, many stoner Scopio’s have been feeling as if there may be new opportunities or a change in direction that could set them free from a stagnant routine. Yes stoner Scorpio, this may be the month where meditative daydreaming turns into terrestrial action. Keep your cannabis consumption to Sativa strains this month.  There will be a lot to do, and a lot to think about.  The creative properties of the Sativa species could loosen those mental gears obstructing progress. One foot in front of the other stoner Scorpio.  You are marching toward your destiny.  And everything is going to be ok.

It will be hard to deny the positivity stoner Scorpio.  The days are getting longer, and that fresh Spring feeling is traveling through the air.  I warned you that the first couple months of 2022 would be a test of internal fortitude; but now it's time to open the curtains, smile at your neighbors, and seek out communal ganja gatherings once again! Toke time to seal the blessings from the universe with a solo meditative smoke session on or around the New Moon of the 2nd.  Create a comfy safe space to explore your internal drives with your cannabis spirit guide.  Inhale the positivity of the plant, and exhale your positive wishes onto the terrestrial world.  The power of this manifesting marijuana meditation will be felt throughout the month. Feel the love and positivity stoner Scorpio.  It will serve you well immediately.  Cosmic winds of conflict could arise in the work sphere in the weeks after the New Moon.  But with cannabis infused universal blessings manifesting, these conflicts will be seen as the simple obstacles that they are.   We can't all be on the same page, or within the same sacred space of perception.  Your internal guide will create an ease of understanding toward your fellow man that should transcend any turmoil. Potentially the magic of the month will be surrounding the Full Moon on the 18th.  This special Moon will blast a bright glow of openness often discarded by the stoner Scorpion.  Seek out your close cannabis companions for a philosophical smoke circle of sharing.  Match bowls with the canna-crew, and share stories. Yes, share yourself stoner Scorpio.  You never know what you might learn by stepping out with the sacred herb as your guide among close cannabis companions.

Ok stoner Scorpio.  I feel you.  Is 2022 going to be 2020 too?  NO. Early in the month, fire up the music, fire up the bowl, and fire up the good vibes.  There is a change coming quickly, and this marker could use a blessing of positivity.  Find a safe space to celebrate.  Whether you are into the healing properties of crystals, or the cleansing properties of smudging, combine your prefered holistic ritual with a bowl burning session with the sacred herb. Use your canna-powers combined with your holistic healing ritual to accept the past, and manifest positivity for the future.  You can't imagine how powerful this medicated meditative smoke session will be. Once complete it will be like finding your voice again.  With honesty and integrity at heart, your words will find the target.  And it's ok stoner Scorpio, sometimes words land hard.  Toke time for self, and smoke about any poor reactions you might receive.  I bet your cannabis compadre might do the same, and discussions with solutions will ensue.   Just give it a chance, and you might find the smoke circle complete once again.  Tensions release with the soothing vapors of the sacred herb.  The ganja gang can laugh, cry, argue, and smoke again all in the same sesh. Stoner Scorpio, in the middle of the month, an interesting conundrum might challenge your bliss.  Make sure you have sacred Indica strains available during this period.  Use the calming nature of your cannabis copilot to envelop all decisions with love and positive intentions.  This will not be the time to duke-it-out or make earnest declarations.   My scorching Scorpion, tell someone (anyone) you love them this month.  Find your voice.  Express love and positivity.

Courage stoner Scorpio.  January marks the beginning of a new year, and an opportunity to set positive intentions for progress and fulfillment that could last well into the future. You are a powerful force within the stoner Zodiac my self-motivated Scorpion.  In January celestial forces will assist in grounding your powerful stoner star sign traits to your inner voice and motivations.  Use the sacred herb as a divining rod of inspiration.  The cannabis strain does not matter.  The positive intention you find in the glow of the burning bowl will light up the night, and your powers of manifestation. Trust yourself stoner Scorpio.  Trust the magic of the sacred herb.  Together, you are a powerful cosmic combination! A key to your powerful presence on the terrestrial plane is your patience, and discipline.  Allow your cannabis copilot to connect the drives of your internal voice to the outward projection of your physical existence. With the sacred herbal-infused connection made to your internal voice, a fresh start and positive direction will be set in January.  The medicated meditations made today, could propel you forward into tomorrow, where passion and progress will be revealed.

Stoner Scorpio, you thought 2020 was an interesting year.  2021 said “hold my bong!”  The final month of the year might be an apropos finish to the wild ride of 2021. The decisions and actions you take in December will be impact-full in future periods.  The year will finish on a serious note, much more-so than whimsical.  But relax my cautious Scorpion, all forks in the road will be navigable with proper preparation and steadfast attention. Load up the stash jar with Sativa dominant cannabis strains and or hybrids.  Mental acuity and creative energy will be required to get the most out of this month. Toke time with your cannabis copilot throughout the month to monitor yourself from a higher perspective.  Celestial bodies may be sending you cosmic support to get lost within passion projects.  While this support might seem nice, you run the risk of getting lost in your own world while life on the terrestrial plane passes you by. As with all things stoner Scorpio, balance must be struck.  Dive into the escape of your own personal passion project, but keep your head.  Use your cannabis copilot to maintain connection to your surroundings. As long as you keep an eye on the necessary terrestrial tasks of the day, you can dive into the solitude of your personal endeavor without concern. The mood of the month may change after the Full Moon on the 18th.  It is at this time that you will need to find your inner chill stoner Scorpio.  Cosmic waves of frenetic influence could push you into perilous situations. Once again, use the sacred herb to find a higher vantage point.  See the situation from a longer timeline so that costly decisions are not made with rash expediency. Remember this as we head into the gift giving season: Nobody requires you to overspend.  Those thoughts are all within your head stoner Scorpio. December will be a fantastic month as long as you find your chill, and operate from a cautious higher perspective.  I’ll smoke to that, and I can’t wait for 2022 either! Tweet

Stoner Scorpio, you have purchased your ticket.  You are buckled in.  There is no getting off this roller coaster ride in November! Perhaps the most important task for the month is the preparation you can make to navigate through all the ups and downs, and twists and turns, expected during this period.  Stock your stash jars with a wide range of cannabis strains:  From deep Indica to pure Sativa strains, and bountiful buds of hybrids in between.  This treasure trove of sacred herbal options will provide the right cannabis tool for the right moment in the cosmic ride expected. Celestial influence will instigate this roller coaster of internal emotions.  It will be up to you to consciously select the cannabis strain for the particular internal movements.  There is no right or wrong selection this month; but instead a conscious choice and awareness is required. Inhale the consciousness expanding nature of the sacred herb my stoner Scorpion.  Understand the concept of high and low within your emotional equilibrium does not equate to good and bad within terrestrial progress. There are great moments of healing and progress that can be found within the extremes of emotional states.  Use and implement your cannabis connection to extract what is necessary from the undulation of cosmic influence this month. The Full Moon of the 19th marks a rebirth for the stoner Scorpio.  Perhaps this rebirth is yet another twist or turn within the roller coaster of November.  Clarity and understanding will begin to peek through the celestial influence with the Full Moon in bright luminosity. It is in this moment that positivity and hope can be seen for future time periods.  Toke time to meditate with the sacred herb near the Full Moon.  Use your cannabis enhanced third eye vision to see the depth of healing and progress you have achieved in the past year. Embrace the rebirth:  Perhaps you will now shed your skin of the past to move forward into a new period of progress. https://youtu.be/01F1phJDsBA Tweet

Stoner Scorpio we are entering into a month of re-balancing.  This October exercise in stability will pull your guarded emotional fringes back to center.  No more leaning on emotional crutches my fierce Scorpion!  By the end of the second Fall month you will be standing firmly on two feet, square, balanced, and confident. Lean into the cosmic winds of stability with balanced cannabis hybrid strains.  All things we meditate internally will be manifested externally.  Use the magical manifesting powers of the sacred herb to target your meditative smoke sessions on calm and contentment. Slow your roll stoner Scorpio, and toke time to settle terrestrial anxieties. Halloween Glass Giveaway Intensity may not be a word you use to describe yourself, but this may be the exact word used by people who cross you on the wrong side of the path. One of the amazing powers of our cannabis copilot is the window it provides into ourselves.  As you focus on balance in October, you may see the intensity you wield on the terrestrial plane.  The sacred herb may show you the results of friendly fire from your powerful stinger. Understanding your power is an important step in the process of internal re-balancing. By the night of the Full Moon of the 20th, this exercise in stability will begin to bear fruit.  Maintain your prescription of balanced hybrid cannabis strains; but now your third eye internal gaze will turn from critical and analytical to appreciation. Use the sacred herb as a catalyst of love.  Toke time for a solo medicated meditative smoke session near the Full Moon.  The exercise in re-balancing will open up a new window into yourself. Use the sacred herb to connect with yourself.  Allow positive thoughts, appreciation, and love to wash over your spirit. By the end of the month the outward terrestrial benefit from this cosmic re-balancing will be plain to see.  As you appreciate and love yourself, so will the canna-fam and broader smoke circle. Tweet

Stoner Scorpio the first Fall month sets up to be a blessed period, but it won’t be devoid of tactical nuance.  So much of the universal influence  and support in September centers around effort born from creativity, married to community.  Wow, that was a mouthful. Early in the month toke time with the sacred herb to tap into the creative complex of the cosmos.  A cannabis strain like Purple Haze could be the perfect tool to tap the cosmic collective consciousness. Stoner Scorpio, the ideas and inspiration that come from this early meditative medicated smoke session will most likely focus on community.  Any adventure worth doing is better done with the canna-fam. Ok stoner Scorpio, you have the ideas.  You have the network of nug-loving canna-buddies.  The remainder of September will be all about hard work and patience. Early moments in the month will require tapping into the creative vibes of the universal flow.  The remainder of the month will require hard work to execute the creative mining. Load the stash jar with a cannabis strain that supports mental focus.  Sour Diesel should do nicely.  Manifestation on our terrestrial plane requires more than meditation stoner Scorpio.  Use your cannabis copilot to support the effort, and clarity, required to execute your creative concoctions. My fierce Scorpion, there is one hidden element out of your control that must be discussed.  Your network of canna-buddies will be required to fulfill your cosmic creation.  However, you cannot control their level of effort or excitement in your project. Understanding and empathy are tools required of any kind project leader. Once again, you can use the enlightened connection of the sacred herb to assist you in harnessing the herd.  When frustration mounts, toke a timeout with cannabis.  Reset your mindset.  Manifest patience.  All things worth doing are best done together.  But we all have different speeds in which we operate. Tweet

Stoner Scorpio, who said the Summer season was all about lounging in the solar rays?  Not you, not this August!  No need to prepare for an ambitious final Summer month, you already know what is coming. And it comes fast stoner Scorpio.  Universal influence will make an immediate impact in the first days of August as all your hard work recently will transition to project completion and professional development. Be mindful my stoner Scorpion.  Use the sacred herb to enhance your third eye vision toward your ambitious options.  Use your keen canna-eyesight to analyze the available projects and your valuable time resource.  The key to August will be to embrace the ambitious celestial influence with confidence, but also with conservative logic. Stoner Scorpio, your spirit animal will morph into a work horse with an abundance of options on the terrestrial plane.  But this cosmic blessing is also a hidden trap. You may want to walk or run down all the trails in front of you.  Take on every challenge available.  The universe will provide a brisk wind to power your ambitious sails, but this very same positive influence could be a trap door for negativity. Gluttony of ambition could leave you bloated and overwhelmed once the music stops. This is where your cannabis prescription for August will play a key role.  Toke time to meditate with the sacred herb to lay out a cost benefit analysis of the potential projects and the available time resource each will consume. Stoner Scorpio, pack bowls of high CBD cannabis for the ambitious work day.  Hold stash jar reserves of the Indica species for the evening unwind.  Your daily routine will follow this formula:  Grind – Appreciate – Repeat. Reflective appreciation for life, and what you have built, will be a necessary step to maintain the momentum of ambitious progress.  These medicated meditative moments of pause in between task mastery will also assist with relationships within the smoke circle. The New Moon of the 8th marks an important window of clarity within the cosmic hustle and bustle of August.  It is impossible to move past errors, mistakes, and transgressions without acknowledging them stoner Scorpio.  The cosmos will offer insight and progress with the passing of the New Moon on the 8th.  But it will be up to you to inhale the magic of the sacred herb, and turn your third eye gaze inward.  Self analysis is never easy, but the breakthroughs last a lifetime. Tweet

Stoner Scorpio rejoice!  It’s officially Summer season, and the warming weather will melt some of your pesky stoner traits.  Get ready to light up the trails to sacred terrestrial smoke spots.  Fears and inhibitions will withdraw as walls of confidentiality are broken down. The planetary influence of July will mute the stoner Scorpion’s natural inclination to recoil from outward ambition.  Tail tingling, you should strut your stuff on the terrestrial plane in the second Summer month. It’s time to come out of your cozy cave stoner Scorpio.  Stock your stash jar with Sativa dominant cannabis strains.  The cosmos will bring a logical gust of wind into your house this month.  This base logical influence, mixed with your bright and energetic Sativa cannabis copilot, will allow you to shed your natural guards. Smokin Js online headshop now accepts Bitcoin and Ethereum. Sharpen your stinger stoner Scorpio!  No soul will be injured, but your powers must be on full display in July.  Especially at the beginning of the month, release tension with contemplative smoke sessions.  Dive deep into yourself. Now is the time to ask important questions of yourself and the universe.  Answers will surely be found this month stoner Scorpio.  And these answers will come without reservation or injury.  Your cannabis copilot will assist in the creativity of inquiry, and the rationale of response. But what is a smooth Summer month without adventure?  Buckle up, hit the road, and make sure you take your cannabis travel kit with you.  Whether it is a backyard barbeque with the ganja gang, or a nighttime dip under the celestial lights, fun favors the baked my stellar Scorpion. Feel the energy of the moment stoner Scorpio.  Opening yourself up to the wonder of the universe, and your fellow tokin terrestrial astronauts, may not be your usual jam.  But universal support will accentuate an expansive mind and body this month. So much of this cosmic tale works in concert with the Sativa species of the sacred herb.  But if nerves and emotions start to fray with burnt bowls under the Summer sun, be sure to mix in a cannabis strain like Harlequin with low THC levels.  Perhaps you smoke the Green Crack during meditative question inducing smoke sessions, and Harlequin during the ambitious answering adventures. The world is yours this month stoner Scorpio, smoke it like you own it! Tweet