Advertise on podcast: Green Blooded Bastard's Movie Commentary Podcast

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The Green Blooded Bastard podcasts primarily feature movie commentaries. While they do not cure cancer or offer profound insights into filmmaking, they may provide a touch of humor, and be warned; I swear a lot. In addition to the free weekly movie episodes, I occasionally post side podcasts on the main feed. These include a Star Trek-focused show titled The Bastard Boldly Goes, a Battlestar Galactica series called Fat Apollo is Life, a Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman commentary known as The Bastard V Lois & Clark, an ALF-themed podcast I Am, Therefore I Watch Alf, and an Ash vs Evil Dead show named Ash vs Evil Dead vs The Bastard. Sometimes, I write bad poetry, create chaos art, and am generally emo.

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Green Blooded Bastard - Death and Ramen

2026/04/20

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Death and Ramen. In this short film, Ramen is trying to kill himself and kinda f***s it up so he plays chess with Death and then goes to the club. I'm Bobby Mom!

Green Blooded Bastard - What's a Nice Girl Like You Doing in a Place Like This?

2026/04/13

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches What's a Nice Girl Like You Doing in a Place Like This?. In this short film, a dude goes crazy over a f*****g photo and shit gets crazy for a while.

Green Blooded Bastard - Torque

2026/04/06

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Torque. In this film, the dude from The Grudge teams up with the dude from NWA to take on Adam Scott and Vince from Fast Five and Blade 2! The film closes out with some Nickleback and shit get's real at some point between several dolly zoom shots! F*****g kill me!

Green Blooded Bastard Chaos Art Zine - 07

2026/03/31

This is a crap little zine I threw together, based on some random art, poems, or collage artfuck chaos art I create while recording episodes or burning time. green blooded bastard

Green Blooded Bastard - BMX Bandits

2026/03/30

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches BMX Bandits. Ninety minutes and there's barely a f*****g BMX in it for around 70 minutes! What a f*****g slog. Go watch Gleaming the Cube instead!

Green Blooded Bastard - Hot Frosty

2026/03/23

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Hot Frosty. In this film, a jacked snowman comes to life to help women cum.

Green Blooded Bastard - Ernest Saves Christmas

2026/03/16

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Ernest Saves Christmas. In this film, Santa is trying to give up his powers to some chump so he can bone an old lady. There are some repulsive little s***s and Ernest traffics some underage girl.

Green Blooded Bastard - The Lego Star Wars Holiday Special

2026/03/09

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Lego Star Wars Holiday Special. In this film, some Jedi goes missing in space and time and shit get's real, bro.

Green Blooded Bastard - Jane Austen's Period Drama

2026/03/02

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Jane Austen's Period Drama. In this film, a chick get's her period as the exact wrong moment and hilarity ensues.

Green Blooded Bastard - Weapons

2026/02/23

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Weapons. In this film, some kids go missing and it's up to Cable, Silver Surfer, and Wong team up to find them. Shit hits the fan and gets real real quick.

Green Blooded Bastard - ANIMA

2026/02/16

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches ANIMA. In this film, a prick dude is living in a fantastical world where song & dance happen.

Green Blooded Bastard - The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause

2026/02/09

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause. In this film, a prick tries to save Christmas again, but this time via vaginal creampie and knocks up Elizabeth Mitchell and somehow does. This is the 11th aniversary episdoe! #fuckice

Green Blooded Bastard - The Santa Clause 2

2026/02/02

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Santa Clause 2. In this film, a prick tries to save Christmas by getting married and tit f*****g Elizabeth Mitchell and somehow does.

Green Blooded Bastard - The Santa Clause

2026/01/26

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Santa Clause. In this film, a prick tries to save Christmas and somehow does.

Green Blooded Bastard - Meshes of the Afternoon

2026/01/19

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Meshes of the Afternoon. In this short film, a woman is having issues. Here is a link to the film: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8u3qVKu59Io