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Talking points: trauma, hynotherapy, ADHD, insomnia, neurology, psychology Team, this is an episode chock full of info. I've never touched on the subject of hypnotherapy before, but it's interested me for a while. Professor David Spiegel came to dispel some of the misinfo around hypnosis as a therapeutic practice, and he offered a TON of insight into what's really happening in the mind and brain during a proper session. If you've ever been curious about hypnosis or are looking for new healing methods to try out, this is the episode for you. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:03:05)- Myths about hypnosis (00:09:14) - The neurology behind hypnosis (00:17:43) - Neurological similarities between hypnosis and psychedelic experiences (00:24:26) - More on what’s really happening in the brain during a hypnosis session (00:28:35) - Can hypnosis help with ADHD, and how men tend to have difficult accessing a somatic experience (00:35:52) - How can hypnotherapy help with trauma? (00:42:59) - Hypnotherapy and healing the somatic intensity of trauma responses (00:45:33) - David’s new therapeutic app (00:52:12) - “It doesn’t have to be either/or, it can be both/and” (00:56:10) - Insomnia, what’s involved in falling asleep, and how hypnotherapy may help Dr. David Spiegel is Willson Professor and Associate Chair of Psychiatry & Behavioral Sciences, Director of the Center on Stress and Health, and Medical Director of the Center for Integrative Medicine at Stanford University School of Medicine, where he's been a member of the academic faculty since 1975, and was Chair of the Stanford University Faculty Senate from 2010-2011. David has more than 40 years of clinical and research experience studying psycho-oncology, stress and health, pain control, psychoneuroendocrinology, sleep, hypnosis, and conducting randomized clinical trials involving psychotherapy for cancer patients. He's published 13 books, 404 scientific journal articles, and 170 book chapters on hypnosis, psychosocial oncology, stress physiology, trauma, and psychotherapy. His research has been supported by the National Institute of Mental Health, the National Cancer Institute, the National Institute on Aging, the National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health, the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation, the Fetzer Institute, the Dana Foundation for Brain Sciences, and the Nathan S. Cummings Foundation. Connect with David: -David's app, Reveri: https://www.reveri.com/ -Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/reveri/ *** This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Become your own soulmate, whether you’re looking for one or not. Visit BetterHelp.com/ManTalks today to get 10% off your first month. This episode is also brought to you by Factor. Chef-prepared meals made easy, made healthy, and hey, no mess after! Check out factormeals.com/mantalks50 for 50% off your first box! Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: relationships, conflict Key word there? Improve. There will always be some form of butting heads, no matter the relationship, no matter how long. But it doesn't have to be something that creates wreckage. It can actually be helpful. Here's what to do. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:02:27)- The first three minutes, and why conflict CAN be productive (00:04:57) - Know the role you tend to play (00:05:47) - Breathe and ground, breathe and ground (00:07:20) - Don’t get stuck in the objective reality and ignore the subjective experience of each other (00:11:33) - After a year, most couples already pretty set-in ways of arguing, aka this is gonna take practice (00:12:42) - Study (and I mean study) the first three minutes of conflict *** Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: biology, nervous system, burnout, mindset, anger I've said a number of times on the show that people with regulated nervous systems are going to be extremely well-equipped for the coming days. To that end, I wanted to bring dysregulation expert Dr. Linnea on to show how important—and how possible—it is be grounded, regulated, and flexible in our responses to life. If you're chronically stressed, THIS is the episode to listen to. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:03:56)- Why is learning about nervous system dysregulation so important? (00:11:09) - What the ultimate core function of the nervous system really is (00:21:08) - The intelligence of anger (00:25:30) - How Dr. Linnea helps people identify and move through their anger (00:33:32) - How much are nervous system issues derived from our parents? (00:37:20) - On children, boundary testing, and how a little bit of adversity is actually beneficial (00:43:35) - What’s more important: developing sensitivity to your current nervous system or understanding (00:53:01) - The Alertness Elevator model (00:59:23) - A five-stage plan to reverse nervous system dysregulation (01:08:30) - The restoration, connection, and expansion stages Dr. Linnea Passaler is a multifaceted health professional whose life and career have been driven by a passion for learning and her desire to assist others. With a degree in oral medicine from the renowned Universitá degli Studi in Milan, she interned at HSR Research- Ospedale San Raffaele – an advanced molecular biology facility located there. This experience kindled her interest and enthusiasm for research and immunology specifically. Through her journey and research, Dr. Linnea was able to recognize the effects of nervous system dysregulation on the sensitive person and how it contributes to conditions like anxiety, burnout, and physical and emotional symptoms. This realization drove her to found ‘Heal Your Nervous System,’ a platform that offers tools and resources to help individuals worldwide understand the root cause of anxiety, burnout, overwhelm, and physical and emotional symptoms Connect with Dr. Linnea -Website: https://healyournervoussystem.com/ -Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healyournervoussystem -Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/healyournervoussystem -Book: Heal Your Nervous System: https://amzn.to/3SN3HcC *** Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: attachment, mindset, relationships, psychology The last “A Man’s Guide” was a big hit. I had a feeling it would be, but the response still surprised me! Next up, a serious breakdown of avoidant attachment. Here's the definition, where it comes from, the signs, and tips for moving away from it in a relationship. This is a great episode to listen to with your partner. Take notes, discuss, and see what comes up! Lastly, thank you to everyone who reached out with comments, questions, ideas, and gratitude. I love doing these longer-form presentations; it means I get to nerd out and really lay things down. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:03:56)- Defining secure attachment versus avoidant (00:06:51) - Attachment styles don’t mean you’re broken or diseased in some way (00:08:20) - What an avoidant attachment style ultimately is, where it comes from, and one major type many men embody (00:15:12) - One major origin point of avoidant attachment: emotional distance or unavailability (00:23:59) - Another major origin point: premature independence (00:26:44) - And the third: rejection of attachment (00:29:27) - Last one: inconsistent responses and emotional stability (00:33:49) - Signs of avoidant attachment in your relationship (00:40:39) - What to do if you’re with an avoidant partner (00:50:43) - What to do if YOU are the avoidant partner! *** Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: childhood, trauma, foster care, relationships We all know that poverty can have a massive impact on a child's future well-being, sense of self, attachment style, and more. Foster children face equally (if not more) significant challenges. Rob Henderson, author of the incredibly powerful book, "Troubled", explains some of what happens. Team, I strongly recommend this one if you're interested at all in childhood trauma, how attachment develops, the apparent demonization of young men, absent fathers, and of course, Rob's book. Seriously could NOT stop reading it. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:06:54)- How Rob approached writing such a profound book—and why (00:14:27) - What’s the foster-care system like in America? (00:23:01) - How does the foster-care system shape a child’s perspective on relationships? (00:36:01) - How Rob found a sense of belonging (00:39:23) - How did Rob repair or build relationships with men? (00:46:06) - Rob’s take on how absent fathers impact children (00:51:33) - On “Young Male Syndrome” and the limits of attachment (01:03:40) - How do dating apps impact attachment, and how Rob worked on healing his own attachment style Rob Henderson grew up in foster homes across California, and is a writer on human nature, psychology, social class, TV shows, movies, political and social divisions, and more. He's perhaps most known for pioneering the concept of "luxury beliefs," a term he coined to describe a new way of understanding the American status system. After working as a busboy, a dishwasher, and supermarket bagger, he joined the Air Force at the age of 17, stationed mostly in Europe and deployed in the Middle East. Once described as “self-made” by the New York Times, Henderson obtained a B.S. in Psychology from Yale (thanks to the G.I. Bill) and a Ph.D. in Psychology from the University of Cambridge (St. Catharine’s College), where I studied as a Gates Cambridge Scholar. He is a founding faculty fellow at UATX and a columnist at The Free Press, and have written for the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, and the Boston Globe, among other outlets. Connect with Rob -Substack: https://www.robkhenderson.com/ -Twitter: https://twitter.com/robkhenderson -Book: Troubled: A Memoir of Foster Care, Family, and Social Class: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Troubled/Rob-Henderson/9781982168537 *** Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: mindset, sabotage It's not easy, I know. We all do it, and we all wonder why. But there's a way forward—and it's simpler than you think, my friends. Listen in. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:03:12)- What people do immediately after sabotaging, why it’s NOT effective, and what to do instead (00:06:12) - Practical steps to move beyond self-sabotage (00:10:49) - If there’s one thing to take away from this *** Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: zen, meditation, mindfulness, psychedelics, mindset I'm one of those people who hated sitting down and meditating, even after a few years of trying to practice. It's now something I do nearly every day, and it grounds me in ways I can't explain. This is a pretty common story, especially among men I've worked with, so I brought Henry Shukman back on the show to dig into what novice meditators get wrong, what some good starter methods are, and really: what IS thought, anyway? Listen in for a great look at the start and "end" goal of mindfulness, and Henry's infectious enthusiasm for this powerful practice. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:03:47)- Do men and women have different struggles with meditation? (00:08:35) - Why do meditation and mindfulness draw more women than men? (00:18:45) - What are the initial resistance points when people start a meditation practice? (00:25:03) - What IS thinking? (00:31:57) - But what’s the actual goal of mindfulness, and how do you get there? (00:38:56) - The power of allowing, and what it actually means (00:49:29) - What is “original nature”? (00:56:16) - Do psychedelics offer the same glimpse into reality as meditation does? (01:04:24) - Henry’s upcoming app Henry Shukman is a mindfulness teacher and the spiritual Director of Mountain Cloud Zen Center. He has been trained by several Zen teachers, particularly the roshis Joan Rieck, John Gaynor, Ruben Habito, and Yamada Ryoun Roshi, as well as by teachers and mentors in other traditions. Henry has an MA from Cambridge and an MLitt from St. Andrews, and has written several award-winning books of poetry and fiction. He currently guides a wide range of students from all walks of life. He received dharma transmission (inka shomei) from Yamada Ryoun Roshi, the abbot of Sanbo Zen, and is a Zen Master of the Sanbo Zen lineage of Kamakura, Japan. Connect with Henry -Upcoming app: The Way: https://www.thewayapp.com/ -Website; Mountain Cloud Zen Center: https://www.mountaincloud.org/ -Website; Original Love Meditation: https://originallove.org/ -Book; One Blade Of Grass: https://bit.ly/3CFLuFz -Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mountaincloudzencenter/ *** Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: politics, culture Recent data seems to show young men skewing more and more conservative and women more progressive. Why? Well, to my eyes, there's one major factor and a few others that are generating this shift. Listen in. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:03:21) - What factors into this? (00:04:42) - What happens for men in some progressive circles (00:06:40) - And what happens for men in conservative circles (00:09:26) - Other reasons impacting this shift (00:13:38) - We’ve attached gender roles to political ideologies *** Build brotherhood in person. Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: relationships, mindfulness, marriage, logic, social media Maybe you’ve heard me say this before, but the modern dating scene seems, well, insane. Case Kenny sat down for a great, insightful convo on why that's a thing, from the expectations social media feeds us, to the meaning of marriage to how AI is going to mess with all of it—or not. Listen in and share this ep if you want honest thoughts and some straightforward tips on navigating modern relationships! (00:00:00) - Intro (00:04:34)- Why are women worried about being “too much”? (00:13:43) - What are guys actually trying to communicate to women who feel they’re “too much”? (00:17:01) - On relational conflict, solving it, and how social media doesn’t do you any favours (00:22:10) - On social media, intimacy, independence, and “settling down” (00:33:10) - Case’s take on declining marriage rates (00:39:01) - Case’s great definition of mindfulness, and mindfulness in the context of relationships (00:49:58) - How can men use mindfulness to improve their relationships? (00:56:50) - Case’s hard-hitting questions to journal on (01:05:33) - Will AI impact the mindfulness space? Case Kenny is a Chicago, IL based mindfulness author and podcast host of the top 25 US podcast "New Mindset, Who Dis?" No gurus, no fluff, and no preaching of generic life advice. Just his thoughts on self-help, wellness, and mindsets with practical and personal insights on how to live a passionate, purposeful, and happy life. Connect with Case -Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/case.kenny/ -YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@CaseKenny -Book: That's Bold Of You: https://bit.ly/42hZeDk -Podcast: New Mindset, Who Dis?: https://bit.ly/3Ue7GkT *** Want a more intense, in-person experience? Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: relationship, mindset, psychology This is a big one, dear listener. This is a slightly new format for the series; specific topics I'll do a deeper dive on, centering on how you as a man can better understand them, better work through them, and better help others through as well. First up? Codependency. If you've got a specific topic you'd like me to cover, hit me up on Instagram @mantalks! (00:00:00) - Intro (00:04:11) - What is codependency? (00:08:30) - One the hallmark indicators you’re in a codependent relationship (00:10:43) - Major causes of codependency: the peacekeeper, abuse, emotional unavailability, and the caretaker (00:30:24) - The tale of Johnny Niceguy (00:35:54) - The signs of a codependent relationship (00:38:59) - Seven questions to ask yourself (00:40:47) - Ways to actually move OUT of codependency, plus one that guys generally don’t like (00:49:48) - Perfection is a fuel for codependency *** Want a more intense, in-person experience? Join a Men's Weekend Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: hormones, testosterone, environment, fitness Is there a testosterone crisis? From the headlines I've read it sure seems like it. But what's going on, where is it coming from, and what can you do naturally to stay healthy? I sat down with Lucas Aoun to cover all of these things and more. Dig into this episode for a brilliant intro to optimizing hormone levels—particularly testosterone—and knowledge on how to avoid hormone disruptors. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:01:10) - What’s happening to men’s hormone levels, the symptoms, and what testosterone is responsible for (00:09:41) - On cortisol, testosterone, and key building blocks (00:16:26) - Outside of stress, what are some things negatively impacting test levels? (00:22:07) - What about cardio or fasting? (00:31:33) - Naturally optimizing testosterone with diet and sleep (00:40:47) - Lucas’ take on TRT and the consequences (00:45:06) - On tongkat ali, fadogia, shilajit, and other supplements (00:56:44) - Lucas’ thoughts on creatine Connect with Lucas -Website: https://www.boostyourbiology.com/ -YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BoostYourBiology -The Limitless Course: https://thelimitlesscourse.com/ *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok

Talking points: collaboration, friendship, masculinity Men, few things are more powerful, fulfilling, and expansive than this, so guard it with your life. It took me way too long to learn and understand, and many people diminish or degrade its importance. Listen in. (00:00:00) - Intro (00:01:53) - Men are isolated and less collaborative than ever before, and we miss out on important things (00:05:06) - Without male collaboration, our society would cease to exist (00:06:40) - What I’ve learned over the last decade about male friendships—and male isolation (00:10:02) - Maybe you yourself are one of those men who could use more friendships (00:11:34) - We’ve got to protect this (00:13:16) - Things you can do to foster male collaboration Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | and yes, even TikTok